NationStates Jolt Archive


I arrest you for dying!

Londim
13-07-2008, 20:23
Source (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/programmes/from_our_own_correspondent/7501691.stm)



Residents of Norway's Svalbard Islands are used to dealing with the dangers of polar bears but, for one remote settlement, wild animals are not the only worry.

Map of Norway and Svalbard Islands

It is forbidden to die in the Arctic town of Longyearbyen.

Should you have the misfortune to fall gravely ill, you can expect to be despatched by aeroplane or ship to another part of Norway to end your days.

And if you are terminally unlucky and succumb to misfortune or disease, no-one will bury you here.

The town's small graveyard stopped accepting newcomers 70 years ago, after it was discovered that the bodies were failing to decompose.

Corpses preserved by permafrost have since become objects of morbid curiosity. Scientists recently removed tissue from a man who did die here. They found traces of the influenza virus which carried him and many others away in an epidemic in 1917.


Longyearbyen town
Longyearbyen is in the land of the polar bear, an animal which causes real dread among its residents
Longyearbyen's "no death" policy stems as much from its remote location as from its harsh climate.

At 78 degrees north, it lies on the archipelago of Svalbard, a group of islands between Norway's northern coast and the North Pole.

About 1,500 people inhabit small wooden houses which are partly sheltered from the Arctic winds by the settlement's location in a mountain valley.

Global warming

Kristin Grotting is a physiotherapist, who moved here 12 years ago.

Girl in Longyearbyen
The children's heavy clothes can leave them with mobility problems

Her naturally light complexion has been reddened by the constant summer sunlight.

The Arctic day lasts from March until October but it never gets very warm and, on the day we met, Kristin kept her thick coat zipped tight.

Looking out towards Longyearbyen bay, she explained that the Icefjord - as it is known - has stopped being icy.

Even in midwinter, the water no longer freezes and the glaciers around it are receding.

"We used to be able to take our snowmobiles right across that fjord," she told me. "Now we can't do that any more and we have to go the long way around."

Global warming is not her only concern. She also worries about what she will do when she retires, as this community has no facilities to care for the old or frail, hence perhaps its entrenched fear of death.

But although there is no old people's home, there is a kindergarten.

In winter - when the darkness lasts for months on end - the children make images of the sun with yellow paint and tissue paper and stick them to the windows.

Kristin has met some of the children at her physiotherapy clinic.

She says they have developed mobility problems because of their heavy winter clothes and must be trained to stretch their limbs in the warmth.

Polar bears


Polar bear
Hunting for polar bears is strictly forbidden and, if you do shoot one in self defence, you must inform Svalbard's governor

Trips outside the kindergarten's walls carry a more immediate danger for the children and, for this reason, the teacher carries a gun.

Longyearbyen is in the land of the polar bear, an animal which causes real dread among its residents.

Every student at the university spends their first day learning how to shoot bears.

Aim toward the chest, runs the advice, rather than the head which is easy to miss.

If you are unarmed when you encounter a bear, toss your mittens on the snow in the hope of distracting it.

But if you see it snap its teeth with a smacking sound, it is readying for a kill.

At which point, I suppose, you could try reminding the bear that it is forbidden to die in Longyearbyen and hope it shows respect for local law.

Hunting for polar bears is strictly forbidden and, if you do shoot one in self-defence, you must inform Svalbard's governor, Per Sefland.

He has a large stuffed one in his office, which he assured me he did not shoot himself.

Wildlife

In fact, it is the governor's enthusiasm for wildlife that led him to take this remote posting, after working for the state prosecutor's office as a lawyer in Oslo.

He also has an interest in graphic design and showed me a special road sign designed to emphasise the polar bear threat.

Like other hazard signs, its red triangle signals potential danger. But the inside has been shaded black so that the image of a large white predator can be easily seen by passing motorists.

The governor drove me past the sign in his 4x4 to see the town's huskies.

When not working with a sled team, the dogs live in large cages overlooking the fjord. They eat seal meat provided by local fishermen.

A colony of Eider ducks has made its home between the husky kennels, about 100 pairs in all. Mr Sefland told me the birds chose that spot because Arctic foxes, which prey on young ducks and eggs, are scared of huskies and will not intrude.

Seeing the duck feathers on the frosty ground made me think of eiderdown and I imagined how cosy it must feel to snuggle beneath a quilt to escape the polar cold when the season turns to winter.

Perhaps even with a cuddly toy - although not, I think, a white teddy bear, which could provoke bad dreams throughout an Arctic night which never seems to end.

What other strange laws have you come across?
That Imperial Navy
13-07-2008, 20:26
Now THAT is depressing... and slightly mad.

I know that in California, it is illegal to drive in a swimsuit. :D
Kalmar and Lotharingia
13-07-2008, 20:47
In France, it is illegal to call a pig Napoleon.
Call to power
13-07-2008, 21:27
In Britain its illegal to set off a nuclear weapon :(
Lord Tothe
13-07-2008, 21:35
In Britain its illegal to set off a nuclear weapon :(

oops.
Liberepopulo
13-07-2008, 21:44
In Britain it is also illegal to die in the houses of parliament, as it is an act of treason.
Ifreann
13-07-2008, 21:44
In Ireland, the maximum penalty for urinating in public is a €2 one-the-spot fine. Or so I've heard. So it probably isn't. Still, funny.
Galloism
13-07-2008, 23:44
In Florida, it is illegal to fart in public after 6pm.
Unitary States
14-07-2008, 00:00
In Austin, Texas wire cutters can not be carried in your pocket.
Setulan
14-07-2008, 00:03
In Florida, its illegal to have sex in anything other than the missionary position. :p

Or so I have heard. Not sure if it is entirely accurate.
Self-sacrifice
14-07-2008, 03:14
Its illegal in Canberra to park your car without locking it and closing all the windows

This was created to deter thieves
Galloism
14-07-2008, 03:16
In Florida, its illegal to have sex in anything other than the missionary position. :p

Or so I have heard. Not sure if it is entirely accurate.

Actually that's true, technically.

We all know that the guy who wrote it just wanted to take pictures of the crime scene.
Holy Paradise
14-07-2008, 03:20
Actually that's true, technically.

We all know that the guy who wrote it just wanted to take pictures of the crime scene.

lol!!!
United Chicken Kleptos
14-07-2008, 03:44
In France, it is illegal to call a pig Napoleon.

rofl

What about Snowball?
KneelBeforeZod
14-07-2008, 05:02
In France, it is illegal to call a pig Napoleon.

In Soviet France, pigs call YOU Napoleon!
KneelBeforeZod
14-07-2008, 05:04
In Britain it is also illegal to die in the houses of parliament, as it is an act of treason.

How do you punish someone for DYING anywhere? You can't, because they're DEAD.
Self-sacrifice
14-07-2008, 06:57
Its the act of dying. If your dead there can not be a trial but it you are fatally ill they could remove you

This may come down to space available to bury people. If they are running out of land it may be decided to move people about to die out of the jurisdiction.

I believe every law has a purpose its just not always obvious due to changing times.
Golugan
14-07-2008, 07:05
In Nebraska, it's illegal to sneeze in church. Also, whaling is illegal in Nebraska, but that's only ridiculous when you consider that Nebraska is in the direct middle of the continental United States.
Lunatic Goofballs
14-07-2008, 07:09
I don't know if any have succeeded, but in many states, lawmakers have tried to make suicide a capital offense. I kid you not. :p
Imperskie Staaten
14-07-2008, 07:17
As I recall, in Virginia it is illegal to have sex with the lights in the room on....

http://www.dumblaws.com/
Self-sacrifice
14-07-2008, 07:29
The only logic I can think for making suicide a capital offence is to stop the individual killing themself

According to the Bible if you commit suicide you will go to hell. This is not the case if you get killed. So to stop someone from going to hell the kind thing is to kill them and give them the chance of going to heaven. In the mean time the people who killed the person can pray for their souls and meet him in heaven later

Now I do not believe in Hell or Heaven or God or well anything, but that is the kind of argument that follows making suicide a capital offence
Calarca
14-07-2008, 07:33
A capital offence?

I can see the judges summing up...

"you were found hanging from a rope in your living room by the postman who passed your front windows on the way to the mail slot in your door, you were pulled down and the paramedics revived you, you cost the state health system a lot of money in the time and materials spent resusticating you and medicating you for the after effects. The police spent a lot of time and scarce manpower resources investigating your attempted self murder, now you have spend several days in court with the associated lawyers fees and DA hours, plus the costs of a jury.

You are hereby sentanced to death, at an enourmous cost of state time and money we are doing exactly what you were attempting to by hanging yourself.




Couldnt you have closed your curtains before you made your attempt, it would have saved the taxpayers a lot of money"
Hoyteca
14-07-2008, 08:43
http://www.cracked.com/article_16459_13-things-you-wont-believe-are-against-law-somewhere.html

Here's a list. I think you can get around that "no feeding the homeless" law if you just happen to leave a pizza outside near a homeless guy, you know, to feed the pigeons, and the homeless guy just happens to beat the pigeons to it.
Blouman Empire
14-07-2008, 09:06
In Britain it is also illegal to die in the houses of parliament, as it is an act of treason.

And illegal to wear a suit of armour while in Parliament.

Another strange law is that it is perfectly legal to kill a Scotsman inside the old city walls of York if he is carrying a bow and arrow.

As for others where to start, so many in the US such as in Texas (granted it may be some other state) it is illegal to fire a gun immediately after having sex.


I don't know if any have succeeded, but in many states, lawmakers have tried to make suicide a capital offense. I kid you not. :p

While not a capital offence it is illegal in Australia and if you fail you can be arrested for attempted murder.

And self-sacrifice while that might be a possible explanation I doubt that it is the actual reason.
Ryadn
14-07-2008, 09:34
Apparently in California, Korean rice cakes can not be made using any animal products.

Last I heard, it was still legal in Texas for a man to fatally shoot his wife and/or her male lover if he discovers them in bed together.
Cholestera
14-07-2008, 09:38
Ohio:
No one may be arrested on Sunday or on the Fourth of July.

It is illegal to get a fish drunk.

The Ohio driver’s education manual states that you must honk the horn whenever you pass another car.

Bay Village,OH:
It is illegal to walk a cow down Lake Road.

Florida:
You may not fart in a public place after 6

You may not kiss your wife’s breasts.

Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.

It is considered an offense to shower naked.

It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.

Doors of all public buildings must open outwards.
Khazistan
14-07-2008, 09:50
in england its illegal to make up lots of stupid laws and post them in threads on the internet.
Risottia
14-07-2008, 09:50
What other strange laws have you come across?

In Italy suicide is a crime.
This is a paradoxical law... anyway it was made so that encouraging someone to suicide is a crime - and attempting suicide is a crime, too, so policemen, medical emergency teams and even bystanders are allowed to stop, even forcefully, the would-be-suicide.
Rambhutan
14-07-2008, 10:07
Cann's Legal Digest used to have a section on the UK law on offensive weapons that went...

"...being in possession of a death star in a public place is a criminal offence"

I think they were referring to shuriken rather than having something the size of a moon concealed about your person.
Barringtonia
14-07-2008, 10:28
In Hong Kong, a wife who catches her husband in bed with another woman has the right to kill him but she can only use her bare hands.

Lucky no one knows Kung Fu.
Risottia
14-07-2008, 10:31
In Hong Kong, a wife who catches her husband in bed with another woman has the right to kill him but she can only use her bare hands.

Lucky no one knows Kung Fu.

What about the husband catching his wife in bed with another woman?

Mmmhhh... Shaolin Threesome...
That Imperial Navy
14-07-2008, 10:40
In Canada, it is illegal to pleasure yourself with a live fish. :D
South Lorenya
14-07-2008, 12:37
This topic needs a link to www.dumblaws.com.
Blouman Empire
14-07-2008, 12:50
in england its illegal to make up lots of stupid laws and post them in threads on the internet.

Good thing that no one on this thread is a law maker in England then.
Khazistan
14-07-2008, 13:17
Good thing that no one on this thread is a law maker in England then.

I meant make up as in anybody just just thinking it up off the top of their head, no actually getting them ratified. Dammit, I hate having to explain jokes, especially if they're not that good in the first place.
Blouman Empire
15-07-2008, 01:11
I meant make up as in anybody just just thinking it up off the top of their head, no actually getting them ratified. Dammit, I hate having to explain jokes, especially if they're not that good in the first place.

I got your joke the first time mate. I was having my only little joke please don't make me explain it.