NationStates Jolt Archive

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

Nothing.
Why, what do you think I should do?

convince him to advicate in my favor.

Probably the same you will do as a Catholic when you die and find yourself face to face with Anubis.

Wait, this is a trick question, right?

quote bertrand russell

there is nothing to do. the die is cast.

either belief is irrelevant and im judged on my behavior in life or belief is everything and im sent to hell.

in any case, its too late to change anything then.

I would probably ask him if all the Gods got on with eachother.

If he said 'yes' then I'd ask why they couldn't make all their followers do the same

Nothing. Like "God" I am that I am. I certainly wouldn't change just to please a God I never believed in or worshipped in life, so why would I in death? If that means damnation, then so be it.

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

say YOU die and find that god only accepts baptists as true christians and the rest are blasphemers who must go to hell? what do YOU do?

say YOU die and find that god only accepts baptists as true christians and the rest are blasphemers who must go to hell? what do YOU do?

I cry and beg for forgiveness and claim I knew no better?

quote bertrand russell

Please do.

(Which Bertrand Russel quote?)

To answer the OP's question: Nothing. Shrug my shoulders and go wherever it is I'm supposed to for being a nonbeliever.

If entrance to heaven is based on deeds, then I'm fine. If it's based on faith, then such a monster does not deserve worship.

say YOU die and find that god only accepts baptists as true christians and the rest are blasphemers who must go to hell? what do YOU do?

You go to hell... if there is a god and you are death then its done....no wait... for mormons you can actually repent after death and be forgiven!

I understand that Deata is one of the new kids on the block, but his trolling seems to be quite professional. Well, it's good to know where the next virtual bukkake of religion threads originate from.

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

Go to hell enthusiastically.

"You didn't see that unfortunate drunken incident with the Nativity scene Jesus doll when I was sixteen did yo...."

...

"...oh, you did. What about the thing with the socks and the mayonnaise?"

...

"You saw that too, huh? Hmm." *shifts uncomfortably*

"Did you laugh?"

I cry and beg for forgiveness and claim I knew no better?

god already knows that eh?

say YOU die and find that god only accepts baptists as true christians and the rest are blasphemers who must go to hell? what do YOU do?

Then I'm in trouble, aren't I? that's just the way it'll be in that situation. If I were offered a chance to beg of course...

I just love "what if" situations.

Please do.

(Which Bertrand Russel quote?)

"not enough evidence, god, not enough evidence."

WTF did you created me atheist MFing SOB!?!?!?!?!?! :upyours:

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

Flip it off. If god exists then it's a major league asshole.

"not enough evidence, god, not enough evidence."

Heh.

Thanks.

Seriously? Either nothing or I'd be a total asshole.

god already knows that eh?

A human can dream....

convince him to advicate in my favor.

Do you mean advocate (i.e. ask God to intercede on your behalf -- but with whom?) or abdicate (step down so you can become God) or something else entirely?

Back to the question: First off, what makes you think God even cares that I've died? Doesn't seem to care much if I live. If I weren't an agnostic leaning toward atheism, I'd probably think God has better things to do than welcome me to the afterlife.
Also, what if you die and there's nothing there?

Do you mean advocate (i.e. ask God to intercede on your behalf -- but with whom?) or abdicate (step down so you can become God) or something else entirely?

Back to the question: First off, what makes you think God even cares that I've died? Doesn't seem to care much if I live. If I weren't an agnostic leaning toward atheism, I'd probably think God has better things to do than welcome me to the afterlife.
Also, what if you die and there's nothing there?

Abdicate... sorry dont know wat iz wus spellin

http://evaporatingpuddle.blogspot.com/2007/10/not-enough-evidence-god-not-enough.html

Flip it off. If god exists then it's a major league asshole.

The Bible does seem to suggest that God can sometimes be a bit unreasonable, but surely we can overlook a few cases of large scale genocide done by the divine power Himself or executed in His name?

You know, this thread made me envision heaven as just sitting on the comfy chair of your choice, munching on an endless supply of delicious popcorn or whatever snacks you want as you watch an endless stream of unbelievers/hell-bound people meet face-to-face with God.

I would ask if he really did speak with a big, booming voice.
Then ask why there was massive lack of evidence for his existence.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=6mmskXXetcg

You know, this thread made me envision heaven as just sitting on the comfy chair of your choice, munching on an endless supply of delicious popcorn or whatever snacks you want as you watch an endless stream of unbelievers/hell-bound people meet face-to-face with God.

Yes that makes sense... Heaven must be like that. Seeing all those atheist/unbelievers/heretics/blasphemers BURN IN HELL WHILE YOU LAUGH!!!!! for not being as good, mercyfull, prudent and moral like you were.

I love religions of peace and love

Yes that makes sense... Heaven must be like that. Seeing all those atheist/unbelievers/heretics/blasphemers BURN IN HELL WHILE YOU LAUGH!!!!! for not being as good, mercyfull, prudent and moral like you were.

Sounds good to me.

buy a few hundred rounds of shots, pass out. I'm dead anyway, might as well see what it does for my tolerance.

I love religions of peace and love

And tolerance, don't forget to include the tolerance.

Yes that makes sense... Heaven must be like that. Seeing all those atheist/unbelievers/heretics/blasphemers BURN IN HELL WHILE YOU LAUGH!!!!! for not being as good, mercyfull, prudent and moral like you were.

Ever read Jonathan Edwards?

Ever read Jonathan Edwards?

Oh yes... "sinners in the hands of an angry god" is just awesome!!!!

I can feel the love!!! JESUS MUST REALLY LOVE ME!

The Bible does seem to suggest that God can sometimes be a bit unreasonable, but surely we can overlook a few cases of large scale genocide done by the divine power Himself or executed in His name?

Like hardening the Pharaoh's heart so he could genocide all those little kids?

Though that would be just the Christian god. A more general complaint is that any omnipotent/omniscient god is doing a piss poor job at something that with that level of power ought be easy.

I'd stare the big dude straight in the face, and say:

"Oh. Shit." :eek:

Sounds like Jesus even loves you hard, in a "bend over and pick up the soap" way.

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

Say "Nice to meet you. I fear I do not particulary like you based on your biography, but thanks for giving us the world".

And then I will burn in hell. Ohwell.

Oh yes... "sinners in the hands of an angry god" is just awesome!!!!

One of his explanations for the happiness of those in Heaven was their sadistic pleasure in the misery of the damned.

Charming fellow.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=6mmskXXetcg

The Great JuJu from the bottom of the sea is one of my poker buddies. He always scarfs down the Cheetos. :(

You know, this thread made me envision heaven as just sitting on the comfy chair of your choice, munching on an endless supply of delicious popcorn or whatever snacks you want as you watch an endless stream of unbelievers/hell-bound people meet face-to-face with God.

"hey ben, call me over when bush gets here, i wanna see the look on his face when god reviews his sins"

Not being an athiest, but being rational, I am forced to ask:

If you experience physical death, and subesequently encounter a being who claims to be God, how do you know it's really God?

Ask him to create a universe?

A heck of a lot of charlatans get by on the "Thou Shalt Not Test Me!" gimmick.

As a Human, I have nothing against being tested to show off my abilities. When I interview for a job, I proudly show off what I can do.

Why does the biggest job of all, then, Master of the Universe, mean no testing?

So, I suppose, if I was athiest and encountered God posthumously, my reaction would have to be: "God would certainly not me to fall on me knees in front of the first being claiming His Identity. He gave me a brain, and expects me to use it. So let's discuss this and see if you can convince me."

Wave and use my gentlemanly charm to blag a spot into heaven or its equivalent by namedropping various saints and martyrs who I really empathised with, obviously.

One of his explanations for the happiness of those in Heaven was their sadistic pleasure in the misery of the damned.

Charming fellow.

That would also explain nicely why it's impossible for everyone in the world to be happy. Without suffering, happiness wouldn't be possible as well.

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

Well, as far as I remember from religion class, the bible states something along the lines that after we die, we are dead for a while first. Then at some not closer defined point we are all raised from the graves, which sounds a bit disgusting and then we will be judged.
If God did judge one as unrighteous our soul will be destroyed.

Well, having my soul annihilated is the exact thing I as an atheist believe what will happen to us anyway.

So even if God would exist, it would make no difference for me.

I would climb god, as if he were a mountain, and when I reached his holy visage...

..I would carve my own face upon it.

That would also explain nicely why it's impossible for everyone in the world to be happy.

Not if we can be happy without being sadists.

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

While I already answered the question, I do have one for you... why are you excluding the Judaic one? It is essentially the same one as the Christian and Islamic God; the only difference is the name. Did you exclude it because in Judaism there is no hell?

While I already answered the question, I do have one for you... why are you excluding the Judaic one? It is essentially the same one as the Christian and Islamic God; the only difference is the name. Did you exclude it because in Judaism there is no hell?

Basically.

This adds a reason to think about things, if there may be a bad situation waiting for you. If the same thing awaits you no matter what, what's the point of the question?

I'd tell him that his mother sucks cocks in Hell. After that, I'd invite Mary down for some coffee.

This is a variation of Pascal's Wager, though Pascal was far more clever in its application.
The problem with Pascal's wager is that it is merely a bet. You are betting on a set of circumstances where you do not know the outcome. Do you bet in the favour of there being a God or not.
My answer, which I still uphold, is that you bet the color and not the number if you really feel like betting for.
The God you mention is a jealous one. Says so in scripture. You choose the wrong means of worship even and you might get hell-slammed. So why bet for the more jealous god? Bet for one of the ones that are used to sharing. The Greek gods will be more forgiving if you worship Zeus for instance and you find yourself facing Aphrodite. (Which would not be an unpleasant circumstance.)
Odin probably would be a little miffed if he found you preferred Loki, but Loki will still be around and thus an escape clause.
Oh, but these are all mythical man-made structures of religion meant to explain natural phenomenon you say. Right, man created these religions to fill voids in understanding, to make certain men powerful and to fill a void in self.
So, if there is a God then what makes you think he cares about your man-made institutions and rules (I.E. Religion)?

God, for someone who is overhyped and overpraised, I don't think I'd draft you to my fantasy football team.

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

It has to be hypothetical.... there are so many 'god' stories, and they're so hard to reconcile with each other.

But - should it be 'proved' that there really is a 'god' (or gods, I guess), after all... I would have no problem with it. Evidence is all I ever wanted, anyway.

Not being an athiest, but being rational, I am forced to ask:

If you experience physical death, and subesequently encounter a being who claims to be God, how do you know it's really God?

Ask him to create a universe?

A heck of a lot of charlatans get by on the "Thou Shalt Not Test Me!" gimmick.

As a Human, I have nothing against being tested to show off my abilities. When I interview for a job, I proudly show off what I can do.

Why does the biggest job of all, then, Master of the Universe, mean no testing?

So, I suppose, if I was athiest and encountered God posthumously, my reaction would have to be: "God would certainly not me to fall on me knees in front of the first being claiming His Identity. He gave me a brain, and expects me to use it. So let's discuss this and see if you can convince me."

its always seemed to be the assumption that once you are in the spirit realm you just KNOW these things. you arent going to be waylayed by satan and taken to hell in a case of mistaken identity.

but you do make a good point. is that a correct assumption? one would br new to this whole bodiless existence thing and could easily mistake a spiritual conman for the real thing. you would have no basis for judgement and could as easily be duped as the poor foreigner who was sold the brooklyn bridge.

Not if we can be happy without being sadists.

I can't see that ever happening.

I can't see that ever happening.

Oh, come on. Horror, disgust, and compassion are at least as common reactions as pleasure to suffering being inflicted on others.

The human species is bad enough without people exaggerating its failings.

If god is omnipotent, I would dare him about his omnipotence, for his seat on the throne, to create a stone that is too heavy for him too lift...

Since this is all hypothetical, I'll take him out with the same level 100 Yoshitsuna that I took out Baal with. >_>

If entrance to heaven is based on deeds, then I'm fine. If it's based on faith, then such a monster does not deserve worship.

This.

I think it's like buying a birthday present for someone who's really hard to shop for. You go in with good intentions, you do your best, then when you die God (if one exists) thanks you and sends you up to Heaven. Then S/He turns in the gift receipt of your soul for something S/He really wanted, like a dirt bike. Or a cloud bike.

I'll owe Him a Coke.

there Is Nothing To Do. The Die Is Cast.

Either Belief Is Irrelevant And Im Judged On My Behavior In Life Or Belief Is Everything And Im Sent To Hell.

In Any Case, Its Too Late To Change Anything Then.

if Entrance To Heaven Is Based On Deeds, Then I'm Fine. If It's Based On Faith, Then Such A Monster Does Not Deserve Worship.

Qft

I think it's like buying a birthday present for someone who's really hard to shop for. You go in with good intentions, you do your best, then when you die God (if one exists) thanks you and sends you up to Heaven. Then S/He turns in the gift receipt of your soul for something S/He really wanted, like a dirt bike. Or a cloud bike.

lol

what an idea. im going to have to roll that one around in my head for a while.

I'd introduce myself to him, and perhaps ask what the fuck is going on.

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.
* Puts on English professor accent *

'I am sorry lord, but you didn't provide enough evidence'.

I think it's like buying a birthday present for someone who's really hard to shop for. You go in with good intentions, you do your best, then when you die God (if one exists) thanks you and sends you up to Heaven. Then S/He turns in the gift receipt of your soul for something S/He really wanted, like a dirt bike. Or a cloud bike.

Wow... that's insightful... *goes off to mull*

The human species is bad enough without people exaggerating its failings.

I agree with you, I really do. Still that statement doesn't explain why you're a member of this forum!

I would do my best to put him under citizens arrest for crimes against humanity.

I'd try to kill it.

You're talking about an alien species here. One that has clearly shown that it hates the human race. There isn't room in the universe for homo sapiens and deus malus.

First? First I probably poop myself a little. I think that would be the normal reaction.

I'd try to kill it.

You're talking about an alien species here. One that has clearly shown that it hates the human race. There isn't room in the universe for homo sapiens and deus malus.

*Narrows eyes. Draws Holy Raygun*

We are fortunate. Our secret was almost out. Now it dies with you!

*Fires*

*Narrows eyes. Draws Holy Raygun*

We are fortunate. Our secret was almost out. Now it dies with you!

*Fires*

:eek:

I didn't know.

Nothing much. After all, I'd be .... y'know, dead.

I don't know what I'd do. But, I know that I'd be happier than a religious person who dies and doesn't go to any sort of afterlife.

If god is omnipotent, I would dare him about his omnipotence, for his seat on the throne, to create a stone that is too heavy for him too lift...

should I take this one or leave it to this week's Chuck Norris Facts people?

Ah hell....

God would create a stone that is too heavy for him to lift. But, being God, he'd lift it anyway, just because he's powerful enough to transcend logic like that. *nods*

lol that question is totally irrelevant because God is not limited by what He created - physics.

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.
My resolve being steeled, i seduce it, of course.

lol that question is totally irrelevant because God is not limited by what He created - physics.
Not really irrelevant - just points out what kind of cowardly, noncommittal imbecile he is.

I would ask if he really did speak with a big, booming voice.
Then ask why there was massive lack of evidence for his existence.Given as many times as he tried to erase his work, i'd say he's an incompetent, bloodthirsty sociopath with the concept of perfectionism that never comes to fruition in his hands, especially if there's free will involved. He's an incorrigible artist that thinks he's on par with Michaelangelo but is far more on par with James Ensor.
After that, the creeping awareness of his pathetic nature resulted in public cowardice.

There isn't room in the universe for homo sapiens and deus malus.Oddly enough, though, there's just enough room here on NS. :)

Mention that while I didnt pray to him i didnt do false things in his name either. I consider myself to be a good person most of the time. I know there are plenty worse people then me

what do you mean what do i DO?

i have no problem with big, friendly, and invisible. we've hugged each other many times.

the question that needs to be asked is: "how likely is it, for the 'main stream' of popularity of human assumptions, to have diddly to do with the nature, origen, form, or anything else, of whatever is; big, friendly, or even little, or otherwise, of what IS UNKNOWN?"

i expect to find when this body i'm wearing wears out and gives out the rest of the way completely, either i'm in some kind of semi wilderness that streatches forever in all directions, neither hungry nor tired, and understanding that my owns perceptions of it are playing a roll in its appearent shape and form, that or inside the womb of some other creative and spiritual PHYSICAL life form, on some other world somewhere, waiting to be born and go through childhood and infancy as they exist on THAT world, quite likely an unimaginably long time latter, which won't matter anyway, because of the unlikelyhood of having retained any sort of solid memory of this life i'm entering the last quarter of now.

god or gods, being as likely as not, just as far off stage as they are currently in this life.

but if not, if that's fine too.

while there's no reason anything can't exist, neither in any way does its/their existence make any less up to us, all of us togather, to avoid screwing everything up, for each other, whatever else does exist.

=^^=
.../\...

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.What if it's the Aztec Gods that won't let you in unless you died while being sacrificed, in battle, or during childbirth?

The first thing I would do.... Ask him what he has against gays.

The second thing I would do.... Criticise his fashion sense and hairstyle.

id say, "nice to meet you Ma'am." you really should do something about that book those pricks wrote about you.

Oddly enough, though, there's just enough room here on NS. :)

Hehehe. Well, room enough for one Deus Malum. Dunno what would happen if more of us popped in.

Give the diety a piece of my mind and then join whichever resistance there is to it.

Hehehe. Well, room enough for one Deus Malum. Dunno what would happen if more of us popped in.Sobering thought indeed. ;)
Thought of you the other day, reading this, dunno if you'd heard already ...:
http://www.princeton.edu/main/news/archive/S20/90/55G21/index.xml?section=topstories
exotic behavior of electrons in a bulk crystal of bismuth-antimony without any external magnetic field being present.
+
Recently, theorist Charles Kane and his team at the University of Pennsylvania, building upon a model proposed by Duncan Haldane of Princeton, predicted that electrons should be able to form a Hall-like quantum fluid even in the absence of an externally applied magnetic field, in special materials where certain conditions of the electron orbit and the spinning direction are met. The electrons in these special materials are expected to generate their own internal magnetic field when they are traveling near the speed of light and are subject to the laws of relativity.

In search of that exotic electron behavior, Hasan's team decided to go beyond the conventional tools for measuring quantum Hall effects. They took the bulk three-dimensional crystal of bismuth-antimony, zapped it with ultra-fast X-ray photons and watched as the electrons jumped out. By fine-tuning the X-rays, they could directly take pictures of the dancing patterns of the electrons on the edges of the sample.
Whatcha think? Or did you already have something to do with this? ;)

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?I would pity him.
I mean, how boring must it be to be immortal, omnipotent and omniscient? Never a joke you for which you don't already know the clue; everything is always the same old same old. Never a challenge. And an eternity of it to boot.
Nevermind us, ungrateful creatures that we are.

Also, I might suspect I'm hallucinating.

I would be most surprised, after which I would ask the entry qualifications, as well as just how many people in the history of the world has qualified :rolleyes:

Ask him if wouldn't mind being a good chap and fetching me a nice gin and tonic.

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

Tell him\her\it I can run things better.

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

Well, if he's real... At that point, I'd give all of myself to him/her and beg for forgiveness and entry into his kingdom.

But frankly..I don't believe.

"Come on, God, let me into heaven. Please! I'll suck yo dick."

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

Join everyone apart from most of the prophets in hell. I say most...because if I remember correctly wasn't Mohammed in charge of a whorehouse and did he not sleep with a nine year old? Seems a wee bit out of step with what we today consider to be 'religious' attitudes towards sex :p

I would talk to him about the Babel Fish and watch him disappear.
Then I'd enjoy my eternity of nothingness.

What do you do?

I start laughing :D

Edit: Oh and then ask him what was that shit (life) all about.

I open my arms and say ''father, its me'' and hope the man who had his son crusified is not a good dad.

Then I'd enjoy my eternity of nothingness.

You'll run out of things to do sooner than you'll like.

Challenge him/her/it to melee combat.

Whoever loses has to wear a silly hat. :D

spit in his eye!!! and ask to be shown the door.

That depends. If deeds got me into Heaven, I'd say a hefty "nice to meet you" and enter. If He demanded worship, I'd overthrow Him and replace Him. Then I'd allow deeds to get a person into Heaven and rescue the souls that didn't make it before due to lack of belief.

*Narrows eyes. Draws Holy Raygun*

We are fortunate. Our secret was almost out. Now it dies with you!

*Fires*

Holy Handgranades of Antioch out of stock?

Probably the same you will do as a Catholic when you die and find yourself face to face with Anubis.intercourse?

Ask him if he's really as crazy a buttfuck as the Bible makes him out to be.

He'll probably blame it on bad marketing.

there is nothing to do. the die is cast.

either belief is irrelevant and im judged on my behavior in life or belief is everything and im sent to hell.

in any case, its too late to change anything then.

Nailed it!

intercourse?

No, that is Atum. Anubis prefers going for walkies.

I'd make a disaproving face while saying:

"You know all of those illnesses, deaths and famine you could have easilly spared us from? Not cool at all, Big Dude."

say YOU die and find that god only accepts baptists as true christians and the rest are blasphemers who must go to hell? what do YOU do?

be glad I was baptised. :p

be glad I was baptised. :p

and if god tells you that it was the catholics who had it right the whole time so you arent really baptised at all and you have been guilty of thousands of mortal sins throughout your life because of missing going to the one true church every sunday and holy day of your life so.....baptism not withstanding you are going to hell for a lifetime's accumulation of sins?

you understand the point of turning the question back onto the OP eh?

and if god tells you that it was the catholics who had it right the whole time so you arent really baptised at all and you have been guilty of thousands of mortal sins throughout your life because of missing going to the one true church every sunday and holy day of your life so.....baptism not withstanding you are going to hell for a lifetime's accumulation of sins?

you understand the point of turning the question back onto the OP eh?

"What a dick!" would be my first though.

I dunno. Would depend on which god.

I suppose though, that I'd probably do nothing. Not like I can change anything after I'm dead. Also, I can't imagine that any god by himself would have the time or patience to individually sit with every dead person to go over how disappointed he is, so I don't suppose I'll be talking to god at all. Possibly a disgruntled angel with a bug up his butt for having to deal with suddenly deceased athiests all day instead of enjoying paradise as he wants to.

Id say hi...If he/she was enough of a Dick to hold it against me...

The Hellion Army needs more recruits anyway, lol...

I'd obviously be at the mercy of a Being's will for simply being weaker than it so nothing different if I were kidnapped and beaten for the rest of my 'life'. Might makes right as far as deities are concerned.

*Narrows eyes. Draws Holy Raygun*

We are fortunate. Our secret was almost out. Now it dies with you!

*Fires*

*takes out Deus Malum with entirely unholy .50 Barret*

Tell him Satan is cooler anyway.

That depends. If deeds got me into Heaven, I'd say a hefty "nice to meet you" and enter. If He demanded worship, I'd overthrow Him and replace Him. Then I'd allow deeds to get a person into Heaven and rescue the souls that didn't make it before due to lack of belief.

hope you go before me

OH YEAH!?!?!

Well I have a question for all you religious types!?!?!

what would YOU do if you die and find out that there is NO afterli.... wait...hummmm...mmmmmmm....oh forget it.:p

Can god create a rock so large that even he himself can't move?

PD: Bearing in mind that he is almighty.

Can god create a rock so large that even he himself can't move?

PD: Bearing in mind that he is almighty.

Probably...I think he'd just do it to show he could and then destroy it...A rock that he couldnt move or break thats the question...

Can god create a rock so large that even he himself can't move?

PD: Bearing in mind that he is almighty.

yes! . . . .wait no . . .wait but yes . . . .but NO YES ARGH!!!!!
*meltdown*
*Chernobyl*

Can god create a rock so large that even he himself can't move?

PD: Bearing in mind that he is almighty.

I hate it when my question is repeated without quoting ;) :gundge:

and if god tells you that it was the catholics who had it right the whole time so you arent really baptised at all and you have been guilty of thousands of mortal sins throughout your life because of missing going to the one true church every sunday and holy day of your life so.....baptism not withstanding you are going to hell for a lifetime's accumulation of sins?

you understand the point of turning the question back onto the OP eh?

Considering that I also attended mass and communion... :p

and yes, I do. but that doesn't mean I can't have fun with either question. hence the ":p" or ":D" smilies I use.

No, in seriousness, I would tell him that in the future he should "inspire" more competent writers and have them get in touch with each other or at least make sure they do their research (in the case of books written hundreds of years apart from each other), so that in the future his text is not so filled with blatant contradictions. In the case of Islam Id tell him that maybe his angels should pick better people to reveal themselves to.

I would also tell him he needs to maybe learn a little more about the universe he allegidly created, because pi does not equal 3. Just an example. Id say maybe he aught to get his history right too.

Finally, Id tell him he needs to hire a new PR guy, because he comes across as a misogynistic, homophobic, genocidal lunatic.

Considering that I also attended mass and communion... :p

and yes, I do. but that doesn't mean I can't have fun with either question. hence the ":p" or ":D" smilies I use.

i highly recommend that if you are a member in (even slightly) good standing that you put it in your living will that you get last rites from a catholic priest. there are few of us who can be sure that we have every lapse covered.

when my mother died, (or to be more exact "was dying") her sister made sure that she got last rites. my mom hadnt been to mass in ..... a large number of years... but with last rites, none of that matters and she went to heaven with a clean slate.

it meant nothing to me, of course, but her sister was very comforted by the whole thing. that made it all worth the effort.

but with last rites, none of that matters and she went to heaven with a clean slate.


Im not Catholic, and have never attended a Catholic Service...so i have a question...

What does Last Rites mean? like, could Hitler have gotten last rites and gone to heaven with a clean slate?

i highly recommend that if you are a member in (even slightly) good standing that you put it in your living will that you get last rites from a catholic priest. there are few of us who can be sure that we have every lapse covered.

when my mother died, (or to be more exact "was dying") her sister made sure that she got last rites. my mom hadnt been to mass in ..... a large number of years... but with last rites, none of that matters and she went to heaven with a clean slate.

it meant nothing to me, of course, but her sister was very comforted by the whole thing. that made it all worth the effort.

I will keep that in mind. :cool:

Can god create a rock so large that even he himself can't move?

PD: Bearing in mind that he is almighty.

Yes, but in doing so he would be rendering himself not-omnipotent.

Im not Catholic, and have never attended a Catholic Service...so i have a question...

What does Last Rites mean? like, could Hitler have gotten last rites and gone to heaven with a clean slate?

As I understand it, yes. But it's probably one of those 'You have to really mean it' things, rather than saying the magic words and getting a get out of hell free pass.

Im not Catholic, and have never attended a Catholic Service...so i have a question...

What does Last Rites mean? like, could Hitler have gotten last rites and gone to heaven with a clean slate?

last rites (extreme unction) is a sacrament that does indeed wipe out all the sins that would keep you from heaven. hitler would have gone to heaven with a clean slate.

which, for all any of us knows, might be the case even though he committed suicide and died with the deaths of himself, his family and untold millions of other innocents on his slate. god decides who goes to heaven, we dont.

i dont know if any of it will make sense to you but http://www.fisheaters.com/unction.html seemed like a nice explanation to me.

Bit off topic...Who would win in a fight Jehova vs Zues/Jupiter...

Bit off topic...Who would win in a fight Jehova vs Zues/Jupiter...

Unicron.

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

Who says either the Christian one or the Muslim one are the "mainstream" God?

What if you wake up and find out Gaia's who you've got to deal with?
What if you never wake up because there is no God and you're just dead?

Unicron.

Oh...wait, the Alien Overlords of Xenthu rendered them Impotent...my bad, lol...

Who says either the Christian one or the Muslim one are the "mainstream" God?

What if you wake up and find out Gaia's who you've got to deal with?
What if you never wake up because there is no God and you're just dead?

Well, the Biblical God IS the mainstream god. Not necessarily the correct one, but certainly the most commonly referred to.

Who says either the Christian one or the Muslim one are the "mainstream" God?

What if you wake up and find out Gaia's who you've got to deal with?
What if you never wake up because there is no God and you're just dead?

What if you dont have the money to pay the Ferryman?...im makin sure i get two coins on my eyes dammit, lol...

WTF did you created me atheist MFing SOB!?!?!?!?!?! :upyours:

Actually, you chose that.

Well, the Biblical God IS the mainstream god. Not necessarily the correct one, but certainly the most commonly referred to.

Idk, I think there's more Asians than Westerners/Arabs...

What if you dont have the money to pay the Ferryman?...im makin sure i get two coins on my eyes dammit, lol...

i highly recommend that you get classic copper pennies just in case he doesnt take zinc or plastic coinage.

its VERRRRRRY cheap insurance.

Idk, I think there's more Asians than Westerners/Arabs...

But they seem to have the good sense to either ignore their god completely in the public eye or at least leave him out of politics.

But they seem to have the good sense to either ignore their god completely in the public eye or at least leave him out of politics.

Touche my friend...I wish we'd learn from them....Our "Founding Fathers" had the lesson...but, there were just too many Zealots for it to last...

What if you dont have the money to pay the Ferryman?...im makin sure i get two coins on my eyes dammit, lol...

sorry, but due to inflation... :p

I'd prove he didn't exist. Boy would his face be red...

Idk, I think there's more Asians than Westerners/Arabs...

Fun fact: There are more asian Muslims than arab Muslims.

God is real, eh? What does he look like, then?

Fun fact: There are more asian Muslims than arab Muslims.

Really? wouldntve pegged that one...

Since the Arab peninsula is part of Asia, most Arab Muslims actually are Asian Muslims. Looks like CthulhuFhtagn quite effectively shot himself in the foot.

hope you go before me

Those beautiful feelings are reciprocated. :p

What if you dont have the money to pay the Ferryman?...im makin sure i get two coins on my eyes dammit, lol...

Sexual favors.

Mythology doesn't say anything about that.

Since the Arab peninsula is part of Asia, most Arab Muslims actually are Asian Muslims. Looks like CthulhuFhtagn quite effectively shot himself in the foot.

Non-arab Asian Muslims then. Still outnumber the Arab Muslims. I only shot myself in the foot if you don't know what the phrase means.

Mythology doesn't say anything about that.

No? Dude, the Greek mythos had more sex than the vicinity of a blown-up Viagra/Female viagra factory!

Okay, there's a lot of hardcore sex going on when talking about the wacky adventures of the Gods worshipped by the ancient Greek, but I never heard of Charon having the newly dead pay him in alternative and more erotic ways.

And CthulhuFhtagn has a point. English is not my native language, every now and then I write something that just doesn't make sense. Usually I get away with it, though.

And CthulhuFhtagn has a point. English is not my native language, every now and then I write something that just doesn't make sense. Usually I get away with it, though.

Sorry about being snarky, I've just been in a somewhat bad mood lately. I apologize.

English is not my native language

Oh? Where are you from?

Sorry about being snarky, I've just been in a somewhat bad mood lately. I apologize.

I don't hold it against you, I'm often a nasty bugger myself on this forum. And to answer Heikoku 2's question: I'm from the Netherlands, Europe.

I don't hold it against you, I'm often a nasty bugger myself on this forum. And to answer Heikoku 2's question: I'm from the Netherlands, Europe.

Hey, do you know where I can find English translations of "Leonard is a genius"?

In all honesty, whether or not you believe in "God", as it were, is entirely a matter a choice to take whichever "God"'s word that He/She/It is the real deal.

The minute a created creature can understand what it's creator is, that creator ceases to be deity.

As it is, worship occurs exactly BECAUSE there is a space for the unexplainable, a realm of knowledge where either I accept something as beyond my ability and capacity to understand, or I ask for proof that explains the issue - but this works out as a contradiction, for I am not capable of understanding.
A catch-22 for the explaining party, as it were.

And yes, I'm a Christian.

In all honesty, whether or not you believe in "God", as it were, is entirely a matter a choice to take whichever "God"'s word that He/She/It is the real deal.

The minute a created creature can understand what it's creator is, that creator ceases to be deity.

As it is, worship occurs exactly BECAUSE there is a space for the unexplainable, a realm of knowledge where either I accept something as beyond my ability and capacity to understand, or I ask for proof that explains the issue - but this works out as a contradiction, for I am not capable of understanding.
A catch-22 for the explaining party, as it were.

And yes, I'm a Christian.

i dont think you can say that.

yeah there have been some debunked dieties through the ages but they have all had the explanation of "you have been duped" (in essense). if THOR were found today and he had actual powers beyond the natural world we might find many people feeling compelled to worship him.

until we find a god that doesnt have a mundane explanation we dont know how people would react to one.

say you die and you find out God (either the mainstream Christian or the Muslim one, you get the idea, judging and monotheistic, immortal, omnipotent, and omniscient) is real.

What do you do?

bear in mind that this is all hypothetical.

Is there anything that I can actually do? According to religious scriptures, isn't it up to god/s at that point?

As it is, I'm already arguing with the hypothetical him/her/it/them on a regular basis. I'm on record as being displeased by his/hers/its/their treatment of the world in general and me in particular. I doubt that my attitude would change if I were actually face to face with a real live him/her/it/them.