NationStates Jolt Archive

I was driving by a self-storage facility that was auctioning off delinquent storage units.

The short explanation is that if someone with a storage unit doesn't pay the rent for an extended period of time and are unreachable, the facility will auction off the contents of the unit unseen to the highest bidder with a starting bid of the delinquent rent. The winner then gets the contents of the unit. Could be crap, could be not. Some people get some very valuable stuff sometimes.

It occurred to me that an enterprising mischief maker could rent one of the larger units, fill that unit floor-to-ceiling with ping pong balls(a logistical feat, but I've had some practice in similar operations) and then let the rent payments expire. Six months, a year or however longer, they hold one of those auctions and someone wins the unit. The unit gets opened and.... mayhem ensues. A lot of mayhem. ten thousand pingpong balls go nuts and bounce everywhere. They'll go all over the facility, and maybe even beyond. Delightful Chaos. :)

One of my best friends was with me at the same time and he suggested that the facillity might call the police, give them the name of the original renter and have me arrested. I said, "For what?" After a long pause and a laugh, he realized that he couldn't think of a charge. I asked my wife(who is a police officer) and except for some questionable things like 'criminal mischief' and 'disturbing the peace', she couldn't think of any. She said even those are arguable since technically, the pingpong balls aren't mine any more. What I want to know, once your giggling dies down, is if any legal eagles out there can think of a charge I can get snagged with, or if I've found the Perfect Prank.

Unless someone dies under a torrent of ping pong balls...I don't believe so.

Also I want pics of this event when it occurs!

Um...uh.....hrm.....

I got nothing.

I was driving by a self-storage facility that was auctioning off delinquent storage units.

The short explanation is that if someone with a storage unit doesn't pay the rent for an extended period of time and are unreachable, the facility will auction off the contents of the unit unseen to the highest bidder with a starting bid of the delinquent rent. The winner then gets the contents of the unit. Could be crap, could be not. Some people get some very valuable stuff sometimes.

It occurred to me that an enterprising mischief maker could rent one of the larger units, fill that unit floor-to-ceiling with ping pong balls(a logistical feat, but I've had some practice in similar operations) and then let the rent payments expire. Six months, a year or however longer, they hold one of those auctions and someone wins the unit. The unit gets opened and.... mayhem ensues. A lot of mayhem. ten thousand pingpong balls go nuts and bounce everywhere. They'll go all over the facility, and maybe even beyond. Delightful Chaos. :)

One of my best friends was with me at the same time and he suggested that the facillity might call the police, give them the name of the original renter and have me arrested. I said, "For what?" After a long pause and a laugh, he realized that he couldn't think of a charge. Except for some questionable things like 'criminal mischief' and 'disturbing the peace', she said even those are arguable since technically, the pingpong balls aren't mine any more. What I want to know, once your giggling dies down, is if any legal eagles out there can think of a charge I can get snagged with, or if I've found the Perfect Prank.

I'd worry a bit about the Goofball family credit rating for letting the rent lapse (they're starting to get a bit sticky about that, reporting every minor lapse now), unless you rent under an assumed name. But then, if they caught you, it could be considered fraud. *thinks a bit" I know, rent it under Ruffy's name!

Unless someone gets injured......I don't see what case they would have, it's not illegal to store ping pong balls.

Unless someone gets injured......I don't see what case they would have, it's not illegal to store ping pong balls.

and there mere fact that someone got injured might not be sufficient. Although that gets a bit complicated, so tell me if you want me to go along with that line of thought LG.

Please video tape this. PLEASE.

and there mere fact that someone got injured might not be sufficient. Although that gets a bit complicated, so tell me if you want me to go along with that line of thought LG.

Well, I certainly don't intend injuries. I already ruled out marbles and even bouncy rubber balls for that reason. Does intent matter?

and there mere fact that someone got injured might not be sufficient. Although that gets a bit complicated, so tell me if you want me to go along with that line of thought LG.

Quit adding reality to mayhem.

Also, LG you will have a TG soon plz check thanks.

Go for it. I don't see any problems as long as there isn't an insane amount of balls there so injury could be a predictable and plausible result.

*Doesn't know the dimensions of the storage units*

Well, I certainly don't intend injuries. I already ruled out marbles and even bouncy rubber balls for that reason. Does intent matter?

intent to cause injury from a civil law perspective is irrelevant. Intent to cause contact is all that matters. The injury caused is a matter for determination of damages.

So if someone is engulfed in ping pong balls, and you intended for them to be engulfed in ping pong balls...well...technically, that's a battery. Now will it get you sued? Unlikely...how likely is it someone is actually going to be injured?

When has a ping pong ball ever hurt anyone? A storage room full of golf balls, on the other hand, that could do some damage.

intent to cause injury from a civil law perspective is irrelevant. Intent to cause contact is all that matters. The injury caused is a matter for determination of damages.

So if someone is engulfed in ping pong balls, and you intended for them to be engulfed in ping pong balls...well...technically, that's a battery. Now will it get you sued? Unlikely...how likely is it someone is actually going to be injured?

Not very. Ping Pong balls are light and fairly crushable. Someone could slip and fall, but I suspect the fall would be no worse than any other. In fact, the ping pong balls might even cushion it a bit.

Does it matter that technically, due to the auction, the ping pong balls arent mine anymore? :p

ya but...

if anything sue-able happens there is this thread as evidence that you had some kind of knowledge or inkling that something bad might happen and that you planned it all in advance.

yeah sure your name isnt on it but when it hits "the wire" one of your many enemies here is sure to send a link to the relevant party as gleaned from the newspaper article that will be quoted HERE.

I was driving by a self-storage facility that was auctioning off delinquent storage units.

The short explanation is that if someone with a storage unit doesn't pay the rent for an extended period of time and are unreachable, the facility will auction off the contents of the unit unseen to the highest bidder with a starting bid of the delinquent rent. The winner then gets the contents of the unit. Could be crap, could be not. Some people get some very valuable stuff sometimes.

It occurred to me that an enterprising mischief maker could rent one of the larger units, fill that unit floor-to-ceiling with ping pong balls(a logistical feat, but I've had some practice in similar operations) and then let the rent payments expire. Six months, a year or however longer, they hold one of those auctions and someone wins the unit. The unit gets opened and.... mayhem ensues. A lot of mayhem. ten thousand pingpong balls go nuts and bounce everywhere. They'll go all over the facility, and maybe even beyond. Delightful Chaos. :)

One of my best friends was with me at the same time and he suggested that the facillity might call the police, give them the name of the original renter and have me arrested. I said, "For what?" After a long pause and a laugh, he realized that he couldn't think of a charge. I asked my wife(who is a police officer) and except for some questionable things like 'criminal mischief' and 'disturbing the peace', she couldn't think of any. She said even those are arguable since technically, the pingpong balls aren't mine any more. What I want to know, once your giggling dies down, is if any legal eagles out there can think of a charge I can get snagged with, or if I've found the Perfect Prank.

Wait YOUR wifes a cop?

Wait YOUR wifes a cop?

How do think I've stayed out of jail this long? :D

Do it!

*does the chaos dance*

First off, I gotta say it comes as no surprise to find out your wife is a cop. For some reason that just seems to click so perfectly.

Secondly, there is potential for a lawsuit or criminal prosecution here (Of course, I'm the first to complain that now-a-days you can be sued for making a bad sandwich if somebody was determined enough. The state of our judicial system is cracked like). Renting a storage unit with the deliberate intent of not paying the rent could count as fraud, and any company which is owed money could sue for payment without that fraud bit, and if you fabricated contact info so they can't find you to sue you then it definitely is fraud. Also, intent does matter, and extraordinarly so in some cases (It is, for example, one of the key differences between murder and manslaughter); even if the ping-pong balls aren't legally yours anymore when Person A opens the container you can still be held at fault for whatever happens afterwards since that was your original intention. I can't think of specific crimes committed by the tumbling balls, apart from the afore-mentioned criminal mischief and the like, but like I said, in this day and age people can sue you for damn near anything.

Of course, with all that taken into consideration, I'm still saying go baby go! and definitely record this thing if you can.

Unless someone dies under a torrent of ping pong balls...I don't believe so.

Also I want pics of this event when it occurs!

Please video tape this. PLEASE.

Go for it. I don't see any problems as long as there isn't an insane amount of balls there so injury could be a predictable and plausible result.

*Doesn't know the dimensions of the storage units*

Do it!

*does the chaos dance*

Now I'm not saying I'm gonna do it. If a similar event makes the news some time in the unforeseen future, it could be a happy coincidence. :)

how much would a storage-unit-full amount of pingpong balls COST?

can you get them in that kind of bulk?

how many .... pickup truck loads would that be?

ive been to a storage unit auction...the one i went to didnt sell the contents without opening the doors so you could at least see what there was to see from the outside.

How do think I've stayed out of jail this long? :D

Skils? :)

Sounds like great fun to me. =)

how much would a storage-unit-full amount of pingpong balls COST?

can you get them in that kind of bulk?

how many .... pickup truck loads would that be?

ive been to a storage unit auction...the one i went to didnt sell the contents without opening the doors so you could at least see what there was to see from the outside.


According to my calculations, 591 balls per cubic foot. Assuming I rent a 150 square foot unit and fill it 8 feet deep, I'll eed 709,200 balls. I'm estimating the cost at $70,000.

:(

Secondly, there is potential for a lawsuit or criminal prosecution here (Of course, I'm the first to complain that now-a-days you can be sued for making a bad sandwich if somebody was determined enough. The state of our judicial system is cracked like).

Of course you could. To sue merely means to follow a lawsuit. You can sue, IE file a lawsuit, for anything you want.

WINNING is another matter all together.

I asked my wife(who is a police officer) and except for some questionable things like 'criminal mischief' and 'disturbing the peace', she couldn't think of any.
:eek: Your wife is a police officer??

And I'd like to buy that storage space. Nothing turns me on like being drowned in thousands and thousands of pingpong balls. :D

Speaking as someone who once helped fill an entire room floor-to-ceiling with packing peanuts and then got its owner to open the door, I very much approve of this plan. :D

now to address the question, I'm having an issue figuring out what crime it would be. MAYBE assault/battery, but that's really pressing it and the odds of a prosecutor picking this up are....well...not good.

The biggest risk that I would see, from a legal perspective, is someone tripping on one of the balls and getting injured. That would be the most likely cause of action that I can see. It's not really criminal mischief, since it's not really a trespass to chattels.

According to my calculations, 591 balls per cubic foot. Assuming I rent a 150 square foot unit and fill it 8 feet deep, I'll eed 709,200 balls. I'm estimating the cost at $70,000.

:(

wow

if i win the big jackpot in the powerball lottery ill fund it!

wow

if i win the big jackpot in the powerball lottery ill fund it!

I've managed to squeak it down to $55,000 but I'm hitting a price wall here. By the way, that many ping pong balls at once may constitute a world record. :)

By the way, that many ping pong balls at once may constitute a world record.
Most probably; they'll give you a world record in any old stupid bullshit these days.

And not the good kind of stupid bullshit, either.

Most probably; they'll give you a world record in any old stupid bullshit these days.

And not the good kind of stupid bullshit, either.

Well the most I can find is 500,000 by japanese scientists to simulate an avalanche. So if i can arrange for a member of Guiness World Records to attend the auction with me along with a camcorder, I might be able to garner some infamy before the lawsuit. :)

I say switch the ping pong balls for butt plugs. And then encourage your local prudish church to bid on it.

If you can't get ping pong balls, maybe you can use styrofoam packing popcorn. It blows all over the place in the slightest breeze, clings to everything and is virtually impossible to round up once it gets loose.

Of course you could. To sue merely means to follow a lawsuit. You can sue, IE file a lawsuit, for anything you want.

WINNING is another matter all together.

If our current legal system has taught us anything, it's that winning isn't another matter; there have been victories in the most frivolous, pointless lawsuits you could imagine, including, if this goes to court, the inevitable People v. Lunatic Goofballs.

1) You could always just say that you've cleared everything out, and close up the service, hence not defaulting on anything, which won't kill your credit rating.

2) If you get this on camera, any sensible judge will high-five you and call any and all actions against you 'totally lame'. Seriously.

There's a feasibility issue with this, stuffing ping pong balls into an enclosed space can become a little tiresome since the buggers escape at any given opportunity, they're almost the LG of the ball world.

We did this with balloons in a friend's room at Uni, we'd thought of ping pong balls but you need a lot of them and, as said, they're a bugger to keep under control.

Your best bet might be putting the balls in a giant box inside the rented space, putting the 'lid' on it's side to get the same effect.

The reasons being:

You can do this with less of a chance of getting caught in the act of filling it
- think about the pain in the ass of a difficult fill that will take time and ingenuity that is unnecessary. After all, you don't want to spend that kind of money then have it ruined by getting caught.


The box is way easier to fill and then lie on its side.


you can put in a sheet and attach it to the doors that pull the sheet when opened to thrust the balls out rather than allow them simply to spill out.
- can you make doors that are lightly spring loaded and block themselves from being closed again?
- don't want to let them just peek inside with no real spillage.

My question is: how much disposable income do you have that you can buy that many ping-pong balls?

My suggestion is: mix in some marbles, tennis balls, and maybe a bowling ball or two.

I got it! Set up a PO box to take ping pong ball donations and paypal to take money for ping pong ball purchases.

I'll send you all of the ping pong balls I own. Although with the price of shipping them I could just paypal you the money I'd spend for postage instead so that you can buy them yourself.

How are you going to fill it? IIRC, those places usually have garage-type doors that close top down...and ping pong balls are...well...balls. As such, they roll.


maybe a vacuum system to blow them in?

How are you going to fill it? IIRC, those places usually have garage-type doors that close top down...and ping pong balls are...well...balls. As such, they roll.

maybe a vacuum system to blow them in?

or perhaps some sort of biodegradable plastic wrap, which breaks down in like 2 weeks under storage locker conditions?

What you want to do is set up fairly cheap speakers to a pulley system so that when someone lifts the door it clicks.

You then have a booming recorded message along the lines of....

'Fools! You have now opened the portals of hell, Ba'al will once more arise and rule the universe. All your base are belong to us! Fear my pointy tail....'

And so on...

Some red flashy lights and a smoke machine might be considered.

There's a feasibility issue with this, stuffing ping pong balls into an enclosed space can become a little tiresome since the buggers escape at any given opportunity, they're almost the LG of the ball world.

We did this with balloons in a friend's room at Uni, we'd thought of ping pong balls but you need a lot of them and, as said, they're a bugger to keep under control.

thats why i went with wadded up newspaper.

I say switch the ping pong balls for butt plugs. And then encourage your local prudish church to bid on it.

I agree with that. And BTW your very hot :)

Just be sure that there's nothing *else* in the storage space other than the balls. Defending your property by use of a booby trap isn't constitutional as I recall, and an avalanche of ping pong balls could easily be considered a booby trap. :p

Remember this guy?

http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,902833,00.html

Yeah.

Just be sure that there's nothing *else* in the storage space other than the balls. Defending your property by use of a booby trap isn't constitutional as I recall, and an avalanche of ping pong balls could easily be considered a booby trap. :p

The constitution really has nothing to do with it....however in most jurisdictions, a "defense of property" claim will fail if deadly force is used.

So you can uset booby traps, just not fatal ones.

The constitution really has nothing to do with it....however in most jurisdictions, a "defense of property" claim will fail if deadly force is used.

So you can uset booby traps, just not fatal ones.

I dunno. I could imagine someone arguing that tens of thousands of ping pong balls add up to excessive force. :p The point was, if the ping pong balls *themselves* are the property in the storage unit, you wouldn't be defending them by having them pour out all over the pavement, would you? That would circumvent any claim that you've set a booby trap to begin with. Whether Iowa's state constitution is typical or atypical, I didn't bother to look up.

I agree with that. And BTW your very hot :)

*bows* Thank you, thank you

Your welcome.

I was driving by a self-storage facility that was auctioning off delinquent storage units.

The short explanation is that if someone with a storage unit doesn't pay the rent for an extended period of time and are unreachable, the facility will auction off the contents of the unit unseen to the highest bidder with a starting bid of the delinquent rent. The winner then gets the contents of the unit. Could be crap, could be not. Some people get some very valuable stuff sometimes.

It occurred to me that an enterprising mischief maker could rent one of the larger units, fill that unit floor-to-ceiling with ping pong balls(a logistical feat, but I've had some practice in similar operations) and then let the rent payments expire. Six months, a year or however longer, they hold one of those auctions and someone wins the unit. The unit gets opened and.... mayhem ensues. A lot of mayhem. ten thousand pingpong balls go nuts and bounce everywhere. They'll go all over the facility, and maybe even beyond. Delightful Chaos. :)

One of my best friends was with me at the same time and he suggested that the facillity might call the police, give them the name of the original renter and have me arrested. I said, "For what?" After a long pause and a laugh, he realized that he couldn't think of a charge. I asked my wife(who is a police officer) and except for some questionable things like 'criminal mischief' and 'disturbing the peace', she couldn't think of any. She said even those are arguable since technically, the pingpong balls aren't mine any more. What I want to know, once your giggling dies down, is if any legal eagles out there can think of a charge I can get snagged with, or if I've found the Perfect Prank.
It would appear that you have pinged your last pong. :D

I obviously went into the wrong field when I decided to go to law school, because I'm far more interested in the engineering problem of how to get 700,000 ping pong balls into a storage unit and keep them there than I am in the possible legal consequences thereof.

I mean, I suppose you could spread layers of plastic wrap across the storage at increasing heights as you fill in the unit with balls, but once you remove the plastic wrap to shut the door they'll all spill out, and if you leave the plastic wrap there, they won't spill out once the lucky winner opens the unit up. :(

Also I want pics of this event when it occurs!

And a video, go LG go

The best way to fill it up depending on what type of storage shed it is and if you can is to take the roof off and fill it up that way. The storage shed I used was a tin shed in which the roof was screwed on, but if it is one of those brick sheds well thats another problem.

Or you could have some sort of divider with just enough room at the top of the door frame and pour your balls in that way, just before the door is firmly against the ground pull out the divider and slam the door against the ground, some ping pong balls may escape but not enough to wreck to event when they open it.

I mean, I suppose you could spread layers of plastic wrap across the storage at increasing heights as you fill in the unit with balls, but once you remove the plastic wrap to shut the door they'll all spill out, and if you leave the plastic wrap there, they won't spill out once the lucky winner opens the unit up. :(

and that's why i suggest some sort of degradable plastic that'll break down long before the door is opened

and that's why i suggest some sort of degradable plastic that'll break down long before the door is opened

No one cares for your sensible suggestions.

I say drill a hole in the top left hand corner and then ping them in using a reverse Dyson vacuum cleaner with a large bag extension.

EDIT: There's millions of other uses for this device as well now I come to think of it.

How are you going to fill it? IIRC, those places usually have garage-type doors that close top down...and ping pong balls are...well...balls. As such, they roll.


maybe a vacuum system to blow them in?

I'll probably use a breakaway tarp.

You set up a tarp across the door with two pull ropes attached to breakaway points near the top. You then fill the space with ping pong balls, the tarp providing a makeshift wall with just enough space to pour box after box of balls into. Then when full, you close the door to about the last inch or so. You pull the ropes to detach the tarp then pull the tarp out through the one inch gap. Close the door and you are good to go. I've done something similar with a cubicle and popcorn, a locker and oatmeal and with a dorm room and crumpled up newspaper. :)

I just like this idea of a space that people will discover...

I'm thinking you could buy some mannequins and both dress and place them appropriately so that when they open it they're faced with this grotesque, debauched mannequin orgy, I mean seriously disturbed stuff - I'm sure you can get some animal mannequins in there.

I can't see it being illegal either and it has a good chance of making the local news.

You could almost apply for some sort of Arts grant if you make it a series.

I'll probably use a breakaway tarp.

You set up a tarp across the door with two pull ropes attached to breakaway points near the top. You then fill the space with ping pong balls, the tarp providing a makeshift wall with just enough space to pour box after box of balls into. Then when full, you close the door to about the last inch or so. You pull the ropes to detach the tarp then pull the tarp out through the one inch gap. Close the door and you are good to go. I've done something similar with a cubicle and popcorn, a locker and oatmeal and with a dorm room and crumpled up newspaper. :)
I was going to suggest something like that. Also, it means you don't have to fill it up all the way, just enough so that plenty of ping pong balls spill out.

Have you tried asking fraternities to donate their used beer pong balls?

This is far too good an idea to pass up due to legality fears. Sometimes the law should step aside to allow a good prank to continue (the naked, night-time tickler for example).

and that's why i suggest some sort of degradable plastic that'll break down long before the door is opened

Do we have that? Can it be bought in a store, ideally in wrap form?

Littering.

Credit rating worries would be a bit of a concern, though.

I'd worry a bit about the Goofball family credit rating for letting the rent lapse (they're starting to get a bit sticky about that, reporting every minor lapse now), unless you rent under an assumed name. But then, if they caught you, it could be considered fraud. *thinks a bit" I know, rent it under Ruffy's name!

People don't think about it but only if one gives their Social Security number can they link it to a person. I don't think rental units require a Social Security number. They may copy your drivers license but that isnt linked to your credit. So to put it nicely any goofball could rent and not get a bad mark on the credit.

Also LG I would tape it and then sell it to a local station for a small bit of cash. I am sure they would pay money to air that one.

Cant be littering because you dont know the litter. I was thinking that it could be something more upon the lines of setting up a trap. Prehaps some kind of weapon for the poor fellow who oppens it.

Either way im sure that the court system will get you with something random because they cant think of the traditional.