NationStates Jolt Archive

So my friend and I were talking today (she works the night shift and I like to call her and keep her company on the drive home) and the topic of porn, strip clubs, and relationships came up. We talked about when it's ok to look at porn or go to a strip club and when it isn't. She doesn't like porn, or strip clubs at all. She finds the whole thing degrading and she thinks it doesn't really do anything for you anyways. She doesn't like it when guys go to strip clubs for their bachelor party either because she thinks it's a sign of disrespect and that you're not really ready to make a lifelong commitment to the person you're engaged to.

I actually agree with her on going to the strip club for your bachelor(ette) party. I mean let's face it, you're engaged and you are about to make a commitment to your partner to love them, honor them, and cherish them, till death do you part. That's a pretty damn big commitment. So, if you're going to make that commitment and if you're serious about making it, then should you really be at a strip club? To me at least, it is disrespectful to your fiance(e), and it does show that you may not be ready to make that commitment.

Now as for the porn deal, for me, if you're single and if you're not interested in someone. Then hell look at all the porn you want. I mean guys and women do have needs and sometimes you don't always have someone who can help you in that department. So, you have to lend yourself a...helping hand. However, IMHO, as soon as you become interested in someone or start dating, you should stop because all of your sexual energy should be put on that person. Once again it goes back to respect, faithful and honest with that person. That's just me though.

What do you guys think?

I can remember one lecturer telling the story of a woman who sometimes tells her husband, "I am not in the mood for sex right now; here's twenty bucks and go get yourself some prostitute!"

*twenty bucks here is about 40 US cents.

The very purpose behind a bachelor party is to have one last look at what you leave behind for that big commitment. This is why it involves strip club, strippers and binge drinking. Because it's the last time you're supposed to do these kind of things.

If a bachelor party involves one drink in a basement telling jokes, then it's just an evening with the guys. You can have that anyday. A bachelor party is one last hurrah before the big commitment. There should be nudity. It should be over the top. If you're not into that, then don't have a bachelor party. Period.

As for porn, the importance is to respect each other and their level of tolerance. Each couple should have a discussion and comes to term with what is acceptable.

As someone who has been to several strip clubs with his girlfriend, and has watched porn with her on many occasions, this isn't really much of a concern in my relationship

If it interferes with your relationship with that person or other people then it's a problem.

Personally, I wouldn't go to a strip club when I'm in a relationship, because I'd rather be spending the time with the other person than looking at some slutty girl sliding up and down a greasy pole in a dodgy club surrounded by 70 year old men trying to subtly masturbate 2 feet away from me.

That is also the reason I don't go to strip clubs often when I am not in a relationship. (I have to be quite drunk)

Porn, well... I don't see anything wrong with it as long as you're not choosing porn over your partner or getting obsessive over it. One mate of mine always used to brag that he hand >100GB of porn.

When you're single, porn can be good, but make sure it doesn't become a problem to you. If you need porn to be able to get off, then you need to cut it back.

So my friend and I were talking today (she works the night shift and I like to call her and keep her company on the drive home) and the topic of porn, strip clubs, and relationships came up. We talked about when it's ok to look at porn or go to a strip club and when it isn't. She doesn't like porn, or strip clubs at all. She finds the whole thing degrading and she thinks it doesn't really do anything for you anyways. She doesn't like it when guys go to strip clubs for their bachelor party either because she thinks it's a sign of disrespect and that you're not really ready to make a lifelong commitment to the person you're engaged to.

I actually agree with her on going to the strip club for your bachelor(ette) party. I mean let's face it, you're engaged and you are about to make a commitment to your partner to love them, honor them, and cherish them, till death do you part. That's a pretty damn big commitment. So, if you're going to make that commitment and if you're serious about making it, then should you really be at a strip club? To me at least, it is disrespectful to your fiance(e), and it does show that you may not be ready to make that commitment.

Now as for the porn deal, for me, if you're single and if you're not interested in someone. Then hell look at all the porn you want. I mean guys and women do have needs and sometimes you don't always have someone who can help you in that department. So, you have to lend yourself a...helping hand. However, IMHO, as soon as you become interested in someone or start dating, you should stop because all of your sexual energy should be put on that person. Once again it goes back to respect, faithful and honest with that person. That's just me though.

What do you guys think?

When is it not right? when the missus says no. I agree with the strip clubs thing though, not becuase of the reasons you have, we can all look at other people as desirable sexual objects and it mean nowt to our realationships. No I just think they are a waste of time, once you have seen a stripper at work, then thats it you have seen it, might as well cross it off your 'to do' list, one is very much like another.

it all depends on whether you go to the strip club to LOOK or to TOUCH.

nothing wrong with looking. touching is for single people.

which is why there is nothing (inherently) wrong with looking at porn. no touching possible. but dont be surprised if your sweetheart is shocked that your whole collection of porn features animals.

In my experience, porn (although I dislike and in some cases outright hate some extreme variations) and such enhances libido leading to a healthier sex life as long as no other real person is physically involved in the process.

Anyways, sex is nobody's business other than the four people involved and the store where they bought the equipment, so...

:P

Cheerio!

Your sexual desires are up to you. If you like to go to strip clubs, look at pron, etc. then find someone who accepts that. If your mate doesn't then make a choice for one or the other. Your own sexuality is your business so do what you want.

So my friend and I were talking today (she works the night shift and I like to call her and keep her company on the drive home) and the topic of porn, strip clubs, and relationships came up. We talked about when it's ok to look at porn or go to a strip club and when it isn't. She doesn't like porn, or strip clubs at all. She finds the whole thing degrading and she thinks it doesn't really do anything for you anyways. She doesn't like it when guys go to strip clubs for their bachelor party either because she thinks it's a sign of disrespect and that you're not really ready to make a lifelong commitment to the person you're engaged to.

I actually agree with her on going to the strip club for your bachelor(ette) party. I mean let's face it, you're engaged and you are about to make a commitment to your partner to love them, honor them, and cherish them, till death do you part. That's a pretty damn big commitment. So, if you're going to make that commitment and if you're serious about making it, then should you really be at a strip club? To me at least, it is disrespectful to your fiance(e), and it does show that you may not be ready to make that commitment.

Now as for the porn deal, for me, if you're single and if you're not interested in someone. Then hell look at all the porn you want. I mean guys and women do have needs and sometimes you don't always have someone who can help you in that department. So, you have to lend yourself a...helping hand. However, IMHO, as soon as you become interested in someone or start dating, you should stop because all of your sexual energy should be put on that person. Once again it goes back to respect, faithful and honest with that person. That's just me though.

What do you guys think?

I think that this post is very, very, very sad

it all depends on whether you go to the strip club to LOOK or to TOUCH.

nothing wrong with looking. touching is for single people.

Or poly people :p

However, IMHO, as soon as you become interested in someone or start dating, you should stop because all of your sexual energy should be put on that person. Once again it goes back to respect, faithful and honest with that person. That's just me though.

I disagree with that part, and that's because of personal experience.

While porn should never replace a healthy sex life with your partner, it often happens that the two partners don't have similar sex drives. Then, it's better to take care of it yourself instead of trying to push it to have more sex, or to just not have any and become frustrated.

I, for one, was in a relationship for three years. I had a much higher sex drive than my boyfriend, so I ended up complementing with some pr0n. This never caused any problem apart form his occasional half-hearted whining, which stopped whenever I reminded him that I had never had said "no" to making love, not even once, in all the time we'd been together.

I will agree that it becomes unhealthy the moment it starts to replace a normal sex life, but there are ways for it to have a place in a healthy relationship.

And on a more serious note, I think the only person who should be telling me what is disrespectful to my partner is my partner, not you. I think posts like this are not only more than a little self righteous, they’re borderline insulting. You don’t get to speak for my partners, you don’t get to decide for them what is disrespecting to them, you don’t get to decide what limitations I have in my relationships with other people.

I know a good few women who liked to be slapped in the face and called bitch, something that would seem awfully disrespectful, but I’m sure they’d have quite a few words for you if you tried to tell them that a partner who does that to them, because they like it, is disrespecting to them. If my partner doesn’t like certain parts of my behavior, she can inform me, and I can make the choice as to whether to suspend that behavior and maintain the relationship, or end the relationship and maintain the behavior. That’s between me and her, I don’t think either one of us need you telling me what kind of behavior is “disrespectful”

SNIP

This pretty much sums it up poifectly

I like porn. But it feels so wrong! :fluffle: At least no one gets pregnant.

I like porn. But it feels so wrong! :fluffle: At least no one gets pregnant.

To me it feels so very, very right.

I, for one, was in a relationship for three years. I had a much higher sex drive than my boyfriend, so I ended up complementing with some pr0n. This never caused any problem apart form his occasional half-hearted whining, which stopped whenever I reminded him that I had never had said "no" to making love, not even once, in all the time we'd been together.


Do Want. Do Want Very Much.
/threadjack.

Seriously though, I think that too much porn will actually keep you from getting into a relationship in some cases. Unfortunately, most real women aren't going to approach you, like a stripper would. And they're probably not going to let you get physical within the first two minutes, even if you can "make it rain". Since me normally have to be the aggressors in starting relationships, we have to do the things that attract women, not the things seen in porn, which would work to attract men.

Although...in that case, maybe watching porn would help you from gay relationships, since you're trying to turn on a man? I dunno, my head hurts now.:headbang:

Although...in that case, maybe watching porn would help you from gay relationships, since you're trying to turn on a man? I dunno, my head hurts now.:headbang:
I watch lots of porn and I've been single for several years.

(I'm a man, by the way)

(I'm a man, by the way)

hahahaha. Oh I bet that changes the mental image people were having a whole lot.

Well, there goes the Do want part.

Yep, that died quicker than Giuliani's presidential hopes.

Neo Art summed it up very nicely already, but it bears repeating - what's okay and not okay in a relationship is the decision of the people in that relationship, and no one else. There's no "one size fits all" rule, and it's frankly silly to suggest that there is or should be one.

Well, there goes the Do want part.

Yep, that died quicker than Giuliani's presidential hopes.
http://www.narutomania.com/gallery/data/1117/house-do-want_thumbnail.jpg

Pr0n!Jk.;)

So my friend and I were talking today (she works the night shift and I like to call her and keep her company on the drive home) and the topic of porn, strip clubs, and relationships came up. We talked about when it's ok to look at porn or go to a strip club and when it isn't. She doesn't like porn, or strip clubs at all. She finds the whole thing degrading and she thinks it doesn't really do anything for you anyways. She doesn't like it when guys go to strip clubs for their bachelor party either because she thinks it's a sign of disrespect and that you're not really ready to make a lifelong commitment to the person you're engaged to.

I actually agree with her on going to the strip club for your bachelor(ette) party. I mean let's face it, you're engaged and you are about to make a commitment to your partner to love them, honor them, and cherish them, till death do you part. That's a pretty damn big commitment. So, if you're going to make that commitment and if you're serious about making it, then should you really be at a strip club? To me at least, it is disrespectful to your fiance(e), and it does show that you may not be ready to make that commitment.

Now as for the porn deal, for me, if you're single and if you're not interested in someone. Then hell look at all the porn you want. I mean guys and women do have needs and sometimes you don't always have someone who can help you in that department. So, you have to lend yourself a...helping hand. However, IMHO, as soon as you become interested in someone or start dating, you should stop because all of your sexual energy should be put on that person. Once again it goes back to respect, faithful and honest with that person. That's just me though.

What do you guys think?

Not this...

And on a more serious note, I think the only person who should be telling me what is disrespectful to my partner is my partner, not you. I think posts like this are not only more than a little self righteous, they’re borderline insulting. You don’t get to speak for my partners, you don’t get to decide for them what is disrespecting to them, you don’t get to decide what limitations I have in my relationships with other people.

I know a good few women who liked to be slapped in the face and called bitch, something that would seem awfully disrespectful, but I’m sure they’d have quite a few words for you if you tried to tell them that a partner who does that to them, because they like it, is disrespecting to them. If my partner doesn’t like certain parts of my behavior, she can inform me, and I can make the choice as to whether to suspend that behavior and maintain the relationship, or end the relationship and maintain the behavior. That’s between me and her, I don’t think either one of us need you telling me what kind of behavior is “disrespectful”

...but THIS.

Porn/strippers, like anything that affects the pleasure centers of the brain, can be addictive. If it becomes something that interferes with the normal operations of your daily life, then it's a problem. But every person has their own levels of tolerance for potentially addictive things.

In short, treat porn however you want to treat it, but leave your "should" as the albatross around your own neck, please. I don't really care that much for jewelry -- especially pretentious, self-righteous, nonsensical jewelry made by people with little experience and even less common sense.

So my friend and I were talking today (she works the night shift and I like to call her and keep her company on the drive home) and the topic of porn, strip clubs, and relationships came up. We talked about when it's ok to look at porn or go to a strip club and when it isn't. She doesn't like porn, or strip clubs at all. She finds the whole thing degrading and she thinks it doesn't really do anything for you anyways. She doesn't like it when guys go to strip clubs for their bachelor party either because she thinks it's a sign of disrespect and that you're not really ready to make a lifelong commitment to the person you're engaged to.

I actually agree with her on going to the strip club for your bachelor(ette) party. I mean let's face it, you're engaged and you are about to make a commitment to your partner to love them, honor them, and cherish them, till death do you part. That's a pretty damn big commitment. So, if you're going to make that commitment and if you're serious about making it, then should you really be at a strip club? To me at least, it is disrespectful to your fiance(e), and it does show that you may not be ready to make that commitment.

Now as for the porn deal, for me, if you're single and if you're not interested in someone. Then hell look at all the porn you want. I mean guys and women do have needs and sometimes you don't always have someone who can help you in that department. So, you have to lend yourself a...helping hand. However, IMHO, as soon as you become interested in someone or start dating, you should stop because all of your sexual energy should be put on that person. Once again it goes back to respect, faithful and honest with that person. That's just me though.

What do you guys think?

You might have guessed, I disagree.
I honestly don't see how either porn (unless you're into the creepy stuff, that goes without saying) or strip clubs are in any way degrading or disrespectful, and I can understand even less how you looking at porn or going to a strip club is disrespectful towards your partner.
I would object to lying about the whole thing, dishonesty most certainly is disrespectful. But if he/she knows and is ok with it?

The idea to stop watching porn because you're dating seems, I'm sorry to say it, downright ridiculous.
I'm engaged, I love my fiance with my whole heart, and I love watching porn with him and having sex with him. But I also love myself, and I love looking at porn on my own, and having sex with myself. I don't see any conflict in that whatsoever.
I would have more of a problem if my finace decided to focus all his sexual energy on me, just imagine the pressure that would put on me!! THAT would most certainly be detrimential to our relationship.

As someone who has been to several strip clubs with his girlfriend, and has watched porn with her on many occasions, this isn't really much of a concern in my relationship

QFT

*twenty bucks here is about 40 US cents.Brute.
Hurry up and buy some land.

dont be surprised if your sweetheart is shocked that your whole collection of porn features animals.Whatwhatwhat?
http://news.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/06/11/2056247&from=rss

I agree about strip clubs to some extent, I haven't actually thought much about them or worked out how I feel about it. But I disagree about porn. All of your sexuality doesn't "belong" to your partner any more than all of your money or time. These are details that need to be worked out between two people to each partner's satisfaction, but I personally never had an issue with my bf looking at porn, and vice versa. Same with masturbation--some women are downright insulted if their guy continues to masturbate at ALL in a relationship, but it's a totally normal, pleasurable thing. I think it's only a problem if you start to prefer the computer and your hand to your mate.

Same with masturbation--some women are downright insulted if their guy continues to masturbate at ALL in a relationship, but it's a totally normal, pleasurable thing. I think it's only a problem if you start to prefer the computer and your hand to your mate.

Heh. Even if she's willing to meet your orgasming requirements, she can't be around ALL the time. :p

hahahaha. Oh I bet that changes the mental image people were having a whole lot.

I have to admit it did, 'cause I was going to reply with something like "Same thing here" but, um, I am decidedly of the female gender.

...it's not a bad change though necessarily...

Heh. Even if she's willing to meet your orgasming requirements, she can't be around ALL the time. :p

My experience has been the opposite, actually, but I'm a modern-day girl. ;)

Heh. Even if she's willing to meet your orgasming requirements, she can't be around ALL the time. :pI'm finding myself with a peculiar quandary - i've never REALLY been afraid of you until now.

I'm finding myself with a peculiar quandary - i've never REALLY been afraid of you until now.

Oh, c'mon. It's not like I'm masturbating right now.


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Wait, scratch that. Hold on.


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mmmmmm


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aaahhhh.....





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Okay.

Where was I? Oh yeah:

Oh, c'mon. It's not like I'm masturbating right now. :p

My ladyfriend is comfortable with the fact that I look at porn now and then. She'd be upset if I went to a strip club, though. So I don't go to strip clubs. Because I don't like making her unhappy.

Oh, c'mon. It's not like I'm masturbating right now.


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Wait, scratch that. Hold on.


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mmmmmm


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aaahhhh.....





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Okay.

Where was I? Oh yeah:

Oh, c'mon. It's not like I'm masturbating right now. :p:fluffle:
BTW, "Too Cute To Strangle" doesn't look like it's gonna fit on the birth certificate with any other names. :p

:fluffle:
BTW, "Too Cute To Strangle" doesn't look like it's gonna fit on the birth certificate with any other names. :p

Pity. It kind of rolls off the tongue. Now if you'll excuse me, I feel a nap coming on.

Oh, c'mon. It's not like I'm masturbating right now.


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Wait, scratch that. Hold on.


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mmmmmm


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aaahhhh.....





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Okay.

Where was I? Oh yeah:

Oh, c'mon. It's not like I'm masturbating right now. :p

I don't know if I'm laughing more from this or amused/horrified/disgusted look I'm imagining on Straughn's face.

I don't know if I'm laughing more from this or amused/horrified/disgusted look I'm imagining on Straughn's face.
It did exactly what i should have expected from a professional clown - it amused me to the point of forgetting how truly evil he is. :)

It did exactly what i should have expected from a professional clown - it amused me to the point of forgetting how truly evil he is. :)

Because, as we all know, the true purpose of clowns is to lure their audience into their dressing rooms and anally rape them one by one.

And don't even get me started with the freaky shit they do with those balloons...

Because, as we all know, the true purpose of clowns is to lure their audience into their dressing rooms and anally rape them one by one.Good thing he's nappin', then?
You get the Nair, i gets tha cayenne. I'm pretty sure he has his own cheese grater.

And don't even get me started with the freaky shit they do with those balloons...
Well, given the addictive quality of the sounds the balloons make, that's kinda understandable.

Oh, c'mon. It's not like I'm masturbating right now.


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Wait, scratch that. Hold on.


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mmmmmm


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aaahhhh.....





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Okay.

Where was I? Oh yeah:

Oh, c'mon. It's not like I'm masturbating right now. :p

LMAOSHIH!

(Laughing my ass off so hard, it hurts)

*salaams to LG's greatness*

I'm gonna go with "depends on the couple".

I don't particularly like the idea of hubby going to a strip club, but luckily it's not an issue because he doesn't particularly want to go. He has been with clients on lunch breaks......because they wanted to go, but he just ate his lunch and watched the show. I think I don't care as long as there aren't any lap dances.

As far as porn I don't like it, but meh. I would rather just have sex and hubby doesn't seem to mind that agenda. I don't think it's cheating unless like....well, I don't think it's cheating. I think it can cause problems, especially if one of the partners becomes addicted or something.

I've watched snippets of porn online for the "quick fix" release, but I own no porn. I prefer my own imagination, though. As for strip clubs, I've never been to one, and at 37, I don't think I need to go. I certainly don't WANT to -- from 1999-2001, I worked at the county licensing agency and had to license "adult entertainers". $52 and a mug shot, and I swear, I'd have given some of those women double that to keep their clothes ON. In addition, I got that job after quitting teaching high school music because it was only part time and I needed money. Nothing prepares you for the moment when you must license three former singers in your HS choir. :(

Whatwhatwhat?
http://news.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/06/11/2056247&from=rss

ohmygod that was funny. i like the judges excuse-- 'uhhhh i didnt think that anyone could see that"

that is the kind of thing i would expect that almost every man with an internet connection to have looked at on the first day he was connected.

More fun to go to a swingers' club with your spouse, if you need that bit of strange.

More fun to go to a swingers' club with your spouse, if you need that bit of strange.

The number of spouses (especially female spouses), proportional to all spouses, who are GGG (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Savage_Love#GGG) enough to permit that activity, let alone seek it out and enjoy it, is probably very low.

And/or I'm not meeting the right people. ;)

The number of spouses (especially female spouses), proportional to all spouses, who are GGG (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Savage_Love#GGG) enough to permit that activity, let alone seek it out and enjoy it, is probably very low.

And/or I'm not meeting the right people. ;)

I've met tons of swingers (okay, only about 30) most of them (okay about 25) are not attractive to me.

I've met tons of swingers (okay, only about 30) most of them (okay about 25) are not attractive to me.

That's why you practice being selective. There are far more of them out there than you realize.

I've met tons of swingers (okay, only about 30) most of them (okay about 25) are not attractive to me.

I have found this to be true as well.

That's why you practice being selective. There are far more of them out there than you realize.

I'm not interested enough to go out looking.

Good thing he's nappin', then?
You get the Nair, i gets tha cayenne. I'm pretty sure he has his own cheese grater.

This is the sort of thing I can expect when I pass out??? It's like being back in college! :p

It's only inappropriate in a relationship if you or your significant other thinks it's inappropriate.

More fun to go to a swingers' club with your spouse, if you need that bit of strange.

What's strange about that? :confused:

I like porn. But it feels so wrong! :fluffle: At least no one gets pregnant.


Your soooo right:cool:

I've watched snippets of porn online for the "quick fix" release, but I own no porn. I prefer my own imagination, though. As for strip clubs, I've never been to one, and at 37, I don't think I need to go. I certainly don't WANT to -- from 1999-2001, I worked at the county licensing agency and had to license "adult entertainers". $52 and a mug shot, and I swear, I'd have given some of those women double that to keep their clothes ON. In addition, I got that job after quitting teaching high school music because it was only part time and I needed money. Nothing prepares you for the moment when you must license three former singers in your HS choir. :(


Would you have paid the highschool girls to keep their clothes on?:p

So my friend and I were talking today (she works the night shift and I like to call her and keep her company on the drive home) and the topic of porn, strip clubs, and relationships came up. We talked about when it's ok to look at porn or go to a strip club and when it isn't. She doesn't like porn, or strip clubs at all. She finds the whole thing degrading and she thinks it doesn't really do anything for you anyways. She doesn't like it when guys go to strip clubs for their bachelor party either because she thinks it's a sign of disrespect and that you're not really ready to make a lifelong commitment to the person you're engaged to.

I actually agree with her on going to the strip club for your bachelor(ette) party. I mean let's face it, you're engaged and you are about to make a commitment to your partner to love them, honor them, and cherish them, till death do you part. That's a pretty damn big commitment. So, if you're going to make that commitment and if you're serious about making it, then should you really be at a strip club? To me at least, it is disrespectful to your fiance(e), and it does show that you may not be ready to make that commitment.

Now as for the porn deal, for me, if you're single and if you're not interested in someone. Then hell look at all the porn you want. I mean guys and women do have needs and sometimes you don't always have someone who can help you in that department. So, you have to lend yourself a...helping hand. However, IMHO, as soon as you become interested in someone or start dating, you should stop because all of your sexual energy should be put on that person. Once again it goes back to respect, faithful and honest with that person. That's just me though.

What do you guys think?

I wouldn't go to a strip club, because there you can actually get something like a lap dance or possibly more. But I would do porn. Face it, the person you're dating won't be available all the time. They'll have their own life to deal with, and they'll be too tired to sex sometimes.

Would you have paid the highschool girls to keep their clothes on?:p

Without a doubt -- but not for the same reason.

This is the sort of thing I can expect when I pass out???There'll be a little change up every time. Kinda like water on the forehead.
It's like being back in college! :pHope so. Sarkhaan'll be our consultant.
<.<
>.>

LMAOSHIH!

(Laughing my ass off so hard, it hurts)
:eek:
Because, as we all know, the true purpose of clowns is to lure their audience into their dressing rooms and anally rape them one by one.
:eek: :eek:

BTW - i think this says something about his sig, actually ... it's only off ever-so-slightly ...
Some are born clowns. Some achieve clownness. And some have clownness thrust into them.

ohmygod that was funny. i like the judges excuse-- 'uhhhh i didnt think that anyone could see that"I really thought you were referencing that, actually. :)
You know that ended up in a mistrial or something like that?

that is the kind of thing i would expect that almost every man with an internet connection to have looked at on the first day he was connected.Yup, got a friend who did exactly that. Saw champagne irrigation, cactuscoitus, getasquidouttames and peer-to-peer all in the first drunken night. :)

Whatwhatwhat?
http://news.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/06/11/2056247&from=rss

You'd think I'd have learned by now not to ever click a link on this site.

You'd think I'd have learned by now not to ever click a link on this site.
THAT is the expurgated version. Seriously, the other more interesting ones i couldn't put on forsomereasonorother.

I don't know if I'm laughing more from this or amused/horrified/disgusted look I'm imagining on Straughn's face.
Surely he'd only be horrified if he found out that LG was thinking of him when he masturbated.
So no-one tell Straugh, okay?
whoops.

Back on topic: Surely it's only a problem when it interferes with the relationship and if the couple can't distinguish between fantasy and reality. By that I mean the guy knows that the stripper/porn star he's watching/jerking off to is not interested in what she's doing at all and just views it as a job and little else: That (overwhelming majority of) women don't get sexually aroused being strippers/pron stars. And that the girl realises that the guy, by jerking off to a movie etc, isn't 'cheating' on her and doesn't view her as nothing more than a outlet for his sexual needs. It's just that he needs it more often than she does and this way is the path of least resistance, in that the other option is annoying the crap out of her for a shag when she's not into it.

I think these issues are more a sign of power struggles in a relationship than anything else. A woman who demands his man to never look at porn cause 'she's all he should ever need' is either totally unable to understand men at all or is just using it to gain power in the relationship.
Which is bad. very bad. and suggests a relationship not expected to last.

Surely he'd only be horrified if he found out that LG was thinking of him when he masturbated.
So no-one tell Straugh, okay?
whoops. Hey, if i can get a god to whack off to the thought of me, all the better. The stuff the olde tragedies were full of, certainly.
:)

I'm perfectly alright if someone I'm dating wants to go to a strip club (so long as they don't go broke doing so) and watches porn. Hell, one time I went to a strip club with the guy I was seeing and his friends, it was entertaining.

I mean, I don't think that stripping or porn is inherently degrading and if women and men want to participate in these industries then they should go for it, good on them. It's not something I would choose to do with my life, but whatever, to each his/her own.

At any rate, I would be annoyed if a boyfriend tried to tell me what I should masturbate to or how I should spend time with my friends so I don't see why men should tolerate this either.

I disagree with that part, and that's because of personal experience.

While porn should never replace a healthy sex life with your partner, it often happens that the two partners don't have similar sex drives. Then, it's better to take care of it yourself instead of trying to push it to have more sex, or to just not have any and become frustrated.

I, for one, was in a relationship for three years. I had a much higher sex drive than my boyfriend, so I ended up complementing with some pr0n. This never caused any problem apart form his occasional half-hearted whining, which stopped whenever I reminded him that I had never had said "no" to making love, not even once, in all the time we'd been together.

I will agree that it becomes unhealthy the moment it starts to replace a normal sex life, but there are ways for it to have a place in a healthy relationship.
It's not just a matter of different libidos, sometimes one partner has to do a lot of work in a week or has to take a trip somewhere (business related or otherwise) or maybe each partner likes having some special time to themselves every now and then.