NationStates Jolt Archive

We asked AOL (http://money.aol.com/insurance/auto/best-traffic-ticket-excuses) users to share the best (and worst) excuses they have ever used to try and get out of traffic tickets. Some of their responses were doozies!

This one made me laugh like crazy:

The Box in the Backseat
AOL user Thecoachroy says:
"My wife didn't care for long drives on the interstate when she traveled on business alone. So she would put a box of tampons (visible) in the backseat. Whenever she was stopped for speeding, she would act jumpy, exasperated and irate. When questioned as to why she was driving so fast -- usually 90 mph -- she would point to the box of tampons in the backseat. No male officer ever ticketed her!!"

What's your excuse for getting out of being ticketted by a police officer?

This is one of those stories that people just don't believe but it happened so anyway...

Back in the day, in Australia, myself and two friends, having worked in Sydney for a while decided we may as well blow the rest of our time there driving round the entire coast.

Since we were not rich as Croesus, we bought a crappy Ford Holden stationwagon off a couple of Irishman that came completely without:

1. Pink Slip (registration)
2. Insurance
3. License plates
4. Handbrake
5. Working back lights.

It did come with:

1. Phat tires - too cool to describe
2. Those open front seats, like two sofas, one in the front and one in the back

So we headed down to the underground garage below our apartment and found a dusted up old Porsche, the sort that looks like the owner has left it there for years, and unscrewed the license plates, which we tied to our own car with shoelaces. Then we headed out of Sydney up to Newcastle for our first stop.

There's a lot of memories from that trip, trying to make it to Newcastle before it got dark so we wouldn't have to turn on lights, trying to find somewhere to park that didn't necessitate handbrakes...

Anyway, we made it to Byron Bay and then we headed up Mount...I forget the name but if you're at the top you're the first to see the sunrise over Australia. We had guitars, beer, weed...no tent so we slept in the car and were booted out by the park ranger around 7am.

As we turned back onto the Bruce Highway, the sound we'd been dreading finally came, the wailing siren of a policeman. We pulled over and put on our best innocent, if not slightly retarded, backpacker faces and waited.

Over he comes and asks for all the relevant documents, of which we have none aside from a driving license - we tell him we'd bought the car off these two Irishmen who'd sworn everything checked out and we didn't realise we needed registration - blatant lie. He then asks the immortal question...

'Do you know why I pulled you over?'
'No officer', looking like we were ready to pee our pants, which is not far from the truth.
'According to your license plates you should be driving a Porsche.

He then looks over our sorry state of a car, possibly admiring the phat tires but whatever...

'Bet you wish you were!'

How we all laughed, basically he explained that we were so close to the Brisbane border, since there was no point giving us a ticket because we were English and he'd have to send it to the driving license address and we'd never pay it, and since he didn't want to haul us in, he told us to get over the border since the Queensland police would not have NSW plates on record and we'd be ok.

He left with the advice not to buy off Irishmen.

We got that car to Adelaide.

Never underestimate the power of looking stupid.

What's your excuse for getting out of being ticketted by a police officer?I've never been ticketed, but my dad had a fun story a while back:

He was caught speeding somewhere near DC back when he was still in the army and had the lucky opportunity to see the guy ahead of him fall flat on his face trying to use the excuse that he was a soldier and it was every patriotic citizens duty to accomodate him as an American hero. So all he had left was his West Virginia driver's license.
So the cop comes over, asks for license and registration, and then points to a speed sign.
"Don't they have those in West Virginia?" he asks.
"Sure," my dad replies. "Those tell us the lowest speed we have to drive."
The cop gets a look of desperation on his face. Clearly he didn't want to spend the time explaining speeding laws to this country bumpkin, so he reduced the speed my dad had been caught doing somewhat so that my dad didn't have to face any serious consequences.

Never underestimate the power of looking stupid.

No kidding. When I was in Copenhagen, I would occasionally ride the trains out beyond my paid area without paying the additional fare. If I got stopped, I'd pull out my pass and act confused when told that I needed to pay extra to be on this train. Never got ticketed, and I have the clueless-American-tourist stereotype to thank for it.

"AAAM ZORRY, AM FREEEENSH, NO TALK EEEENGLISH!"
"Uuuhu"

I have claimed to be an NSDF agent once. Nobody plays Battlezone anymore.

I have claimed to be an NSDF agent once. Nobody plays Battlezone anymore.
BZ2 was oh so superior.

I flash my old military ID and say there has been a Recall and i have to get back to post to see if it is real or just training. as long as i have shaved in the last 3 days and i am not drunk it works.