NationStates Jolt Archive

...and you only had a cinderblock and a stick...what would you do to save your family? :D

Save my family? I'd crack their heads open and start eating their brains now.

Call MacGyver.

I'de get in the car and drive like hell, ofcourse.

Call MacGyver.
Call him with a cinderblock?
I'de get in the car and drive like hell, ofcourse.

Drive away in the cinderblock?

...and you only had a cinderblock and a stick...what would you do to save your family? :D

Use the cinderblock to hobble them then run away while the zombies are busy eating.

Call him with a cinderblock?


Drive away in the cinderblock?

Thank you for getting the spirit of this ridiculous scenario.

Call him with a cinderblock?


Drive away in the cinderblock?

There's always a Mr. Negative when a crisis is on :)

Thank you for getting the spirit of this ridiculous scenario.
I do what I can.
There's always a Mr. Negative when a crisis is on :)

I've got my plan, all I have left to do Is poke holes in yours.

I've got my plan, all I have left to do Is poke holes in yours.

Well, since you're around, I'd cry 'Quick, make a fire!', shove the cinderblock and stick in your hand and run like hell.

You're back on your own with the cinderblock and stick :)

...and you only had a cinderblock and a stick...what would you do to save your family? :D

Well luckily for me, my house is surrounded by mines that I can detonate with a remote! So HA!

...and you only had a cinderblock and a stick...what would you do to save your family? :D

I'll burn some zombies and then run, run like a whore at 3AM, escaping a Pimp Named Slickback!:eek:

Drive away in the cinderblock?
I'm home, means my car is parked in front :)

It depends... how many zombies, and are we talking the original George Romero zombines that move slow but can break through glass, or the Dawn of the Dead remake zombies that can run very fast but were unable to penetrate the mall even though it had plate glass walls and doors?

Because I'm in a ground floor apartment with a sliding glass door...

So assuming the worst, I'd take my family upstairs to one of the empty units on the second floor and kick the door in, then secure it with either the deadbolt (If I didn't break it already) or I'd grab a door off teh hinges from within the apartment and angle-wedge it under the entry door knob to hold it shut.

Next, I'd look out over the balcony to determine how many zombies there are and how fast they can move. I'd get the family up onto the roof by means of the balconies (It's only a 3 level building) and from there we could, if there weren'ttoo many zombies, make our way from building to building (they're connected) to a zombie-free spot and since the buildings are on a hill there's always a side with only 2 stories exposed.

We'd make our way back down (smashing windows if necessary) to street level then make tracks.

Call him with a cinderblock?


Drive away in the cinderblock?

If I only have a stick and a cinderblock, I don't have a family so I wouldn't need to protect them...

If I only have a stick and a cinderblock, I don't have a family so I wouldn't need to protect them...

Genius!

But I have a shotgun! I don't need to worry about your scenario.

I would pierce my flesh with the stick and perform the traditional prayer dance of my people. Periodically, my son would be encouraged to bash me with the cinder block in order to increase the agonies of my flesh and the power of the ritual.

...and you only had a cinderblock and a stick...what would you do to save your family? :D
A cinderblock and a stick? Family in my house? Utterly unrealistic situation.

...and perform the traditional prayer dance of my people.

The Kent's of Akron, Ohio have a traditional prayer dance?

The Kent's of Akron, Ohio have a traditional prayer dance?
Yes, they do, and it involves Mr. and Mrs. Kent, as well as a goat and several jars of Vaseline.
I, however, am not affiliated with them in anyway.

I'd throw the stick of dynamite at the crowd of zombies and run

I certainly wouldn't stick around

Yes, they do, and it involves Mr. and Mrs. Kent, as well as a goat and several jars of Vaseline.
I, however, am not affiliated with them in anyway.

Goats must really resent this role, anytime someone feels like a sacrifice of a weekend it's either them or the chickens.

Imagine what the goat felt like when God said, 'S'alright Abraham, take Isaac off the altar and kill the goat instead'

Gutted.

I'd throw the stick of dynamite at the crowd of zombies and run

I certainly wouldn't stick around

/thread.

...and you only had a cinderblock and a stick...what would you do to save your family? :D

Why would I only have a cinderblock and a stick? They're approaching MY house, right? Where's all my shit gone?

I'd throw the stick of dynamite at the crowd of zombies and run

I certainly wouldn't stick around

Right, because that would blow your lead away...

Imagine what the goat felt like when God said, 'S'alright Abraham, take Isaac off the altar and kill the goat instead'

Gutted.

"YOU SONOVA!!!! :mad:"

Thats what it felt.

"If A Wild Pack of Zombies" Wild pack? Do they come Tame? Farm raised? Organic?

Retreat into a narrow corridor with only one way in and completely safe behind me. The family goes behind me. Then, with all of the zombies cramming through this narrow opening, place down the cinder block to trip any zombie that comes through. Cudgel the undead with the stick, and eventually you get a nice barricade of zombie bodies that'll hold while me and the family (which mostly consists of the girlfriend and the dog) run to the bedroom, where the guns are kept. Figure out a way of escape, probably the fire-escape, and either get to street level, or head to the roofs, preferably the former.

clime on top of the roof, bring as much food as i could, a easy sat up tent, some blankets,high proof vodka and a box of matches + lots of water.;)

then id set up camp, block up the exits and wait them to see somone else to eat.

if they get to close i would cover them in the vodka and light them on fire, then put the fire out with the water.

obviously if i had a phone i wud call the police, failing that i wud use the burning zombies as a flare and wait for help.

how's that for a survival story!

Why would I only have a cinderblock and a stick? They're approaching MY house, right? Where's all my shit gone?

youv just been robed by som1 with a lot of time on their hands!

Use the ciderblock to smash a window, Tie a shard of glass to the stick, hey presto, instant sword.

Seeing as this would be the end of the world, I would sit down and hope that my constant praying to Cthulhu would cause him/her/it to come down from the great Ocean and smite me and my family quick and painlessly, thus removing the threat of my eventual demise at the hands of a wild pack of zombies.

I'd lock all my doors, put my family inside of my 1970's bomb shelter (MY dad was a scared American, you know "o god here come the reds") then I'd find an exit where there aren't any zombies around, find the zombies throw the cinder block at them to get their attention then run to another house break in find better weapons and kill um all, my community is full of redneck hicks (Alabama) so a gun wouldn't be hard to find, or I'd just get eaten, fucking zombie bastards.

I would probably behave oddly. *nod*

King Arthur the Great ---- Retreat into a narrow corridor with only one way in and completely safe behind me. The family goes behind me. Then, with all of the zombies cramming through this narrow opening, place down the cinder block to trip any zombie that comes through. Cudgel the undead with the stick, and eventually you get a nice barricade of zombie bodies that'll hold while me and the family (which mostly consists of the girlfriend and the dog) run to the bedroom, where the guns are kept. Figure out a way of escape, probably the fire-escape, and either get to street level, or head to the roofs, preferably the former.


I have to say that I love that idea!

A stick and a cinderblock?
If it's more than three or four zombies, I'm completely screwed, and even if its only a few, I'm probably screwed.

I'd need to completely bludeon the zombie's brain to deal any significant damage to it. Considering the unweildiness of a cinderblock, I'd probably get bitten in the process of killing a single zombie -- though kill is, admittedly, an inaccurate word to use here. If there are only a few zombies, I could probably "kill" all of them, get bitten in the process, and then have my spouse or children kill me before I go zombie.

If there are more zombies than that, then they'd probably kill everyone.

My only chance would lie in a well-coordinated ambushing effort inside the house. My family would remove their clothes and rip them to shreds, which can be used as a significant supply of rope. These ropes could be used, with proper practice and coordination, to restrain a single zombie, while the cinderblock is dropped on its head.

The problem is swarm. If a single zombie enters the house, then one of the ropes could theoretically be used to restrain its moan, and prevent it from notifying nearby zombies of our presence. Perhaps two zombies could be restrained in this way.
But if its more than two or three zombies, the coordination becomes logistically unfeasible. Even if I could manage to kill a somewhat larger group of zombies, they will inevitably call their undead kin. I can't kill a large group of zombies with a cinderblock, and any barricade will keep me in, without supplies, as well as it will keep any zombie out. They can wait longer than I can. Oh, and most barricades won't keep them out.

The stick is worthless. I would need to strike directly through the eye socket for it to be effective, and that is as unlikely as it is crucial.

My best bet is probably to walk casually out of the house and away from the zombies. If I can get outside their general perimeter, then I have a good chance of escape if I can walk to another town. They have endurance, but I have speed, and reaching another town is basically golden.
If I can't get outside their perimeter, I'm dead anyway.

I am a student of the Zombie Survival Guide.

I would commit seppuku, with the cinder block. Totally painless death.;)

Lean the stick on the cinder block to make the zombies trip over it. :D

/ stick

[oo] cinder block

/[oo] ultimate zombie trap!


And if that doesn't work: Poke'em in the eye!!!

Well if my family were in my halls of residence. They'd be safe. I assume that security would shut the metal gates at the entrance. Then my flat is on the 2nd floor of a block and to get into the building, you have to have a key card or the door will not open. Safe enough I feel.

Genius!

Not really. The opening post states both that you have a family and that the only tools you have are a stick and cinderblock. No car. No shotgun. Is it really that hard to play by simple rules without saying LOLZ BUT I G0T A T4NK!!!111

Call MacGyver.

I was actually going to say that...Use the cinderblock to keep the door closed until he got there and use the stick to poke someone for the hell of it.

There are tame domesticated packs of zombies?

There are tame domesticated packs of zombies?

You get three for a quid.

You get three for a quid.

Quid......tastic?

If I could use anything else, I'd put marbles in my paintball gun and aim for the head. Then steal a car, and go to my dad's and get his guns, then procee to try and kill as many as I could.

Wild pack eh? Not like all those domesticated packs of zombies you're always hearing about.

Nothing. I'd let them all die, because I don't care.

...and you only had a cinderblock and a stick...what would you do to save your family? :D

Then I wouldn't have a house, family, or for that matter, an existence no? Thereby, I can conclude that my consciousness is non-corporeal and as such, the zombie hoard is no threat to me as they are corporeal. Perhaps by concentrating hard enough, I can alter reality so that there are no zombies then.

Problem solved.

...and you only had a cinderblock and a stick...what would you do to save your family? :D

Get eaten.

Um, ditch the cinderblock, take the stick and find a good place to fortify...like a mall.

EDIT: Or a fort

Wild pack eh? Not like all those domesticated packs of zombies you're always hearing about.

I hear those things are great with kids!

Either engage the zombies in combat to distract them whilst my family makes it's daring escape or hold up in the house.

...and you only had a cinderblock and a stick...what would you do to save your family? :D

If I have only a cinderblock and a stick, I'm clearly not at my house. Problem solved! :D

If I only have a stick and a cinderblock, I don't have a family so I wouldn't need to protect them...
maybe the cinderblock and the stick are your family...

"I'll call you Cinders! and you can be Sticky McStick. Oh joy! My own family at long last!"

Where the hell did I get a freaking cinderblock? Stick I can see but Cinderblock? WTF.

I deny the existance of said cinderblock, causing a mini black hole to open up that will suck in the zombies.

If I could use anything else, I'd put marbles in my paintball gun and aim for the head. Could that kill?

I'd use the cinderblock to bash open the lock on the liquor cabinet then take all the alcohol found there. Then I would take the cinderblock and bash my brother over the head with it. I'd surround his unconcious body with the bottles of liquor with strips of cloth from his shirt which I would tear and place inside. After creating a path of alcohol to the remaining bottles. Then I would take the stick and using the old boy scout move cause it alith. Then keep the fire going. Most likely by taking off my shirt and setting it on fire. Then while I am doing this I would have my girlfriend, sisters, and my mother tie my father up in the upstairs bedroom with their shoelaces. While I wait at the end of the path for the zombies to come in and go for my brother. When they do I set light to the alcohol and watch the zombies get consumed in a giant ball of fire.

After that I get upstairs to the bedroom and send my mother and sisters outthe window on a rope made of their spare clothes and bedsheets. Sending the four running off in different directions. Then down me and my girl go. Making our own way secretly to the pawn shop down the street while the zombies are busy killing everyone else. Pick up some weapons at the pawn shop and steal a car. Find the nearest Gun and Bow and pick up some serioues firepower and weapons. And then kick zombie tail all over.

Family, me and my girlfriend, saved.

Zombies have an aversion to fire, right? I'd rub the sitck on the cinderblock to turn the stick into a torch and run like hell holding it. When the zombies came close, they'd see the fire and go "Aiiee!" before stumbling backwards. :D

Zombies have an aversion to fire, right? I'd rub the sitck on the cinderblock to turn the stick into a torch and run like hell holding it. When the zombies came close, they'd see the fire and go "Aiiee!" before stumbling backwards. :D

http://i134.photobucket.com/albums/q100/TheSteveslols/zombiepostersmall.png

Wake the family, then start casually walking away.

Zombies are NOT known for speed.

EDIT: And I'd remind them that 2/3 of the previous post's image is blantantly false.

Wake the family, then start casually walking away.

Zombies are NOT known for speed.

EDIT: And I'd remind them that 2/3 of the previous post's image is blantantly false.

Sif its false. I for one wouldn't want great balls of flaming zombies munching on my brain.

...and you only had a cinderblock and a stick...what would you do to save your family? :D

leave my family and find a fucken gun...shit family is a liability at that moment, if they can't save themselves then fuck 'em. Sure I love 'em but I aint gunna die with them, which I know would happen.

...and you only had a cinderblock and a stick...what would you do to save your family? :D

Are they Shaun of the Dead zombies?

Id call MacGyver...

Order a group of fat people to 'run' in the opposite direction as the zombies will go after the easier target and leave me be.

...and you only had a cinderblock and a stick...what would you do to save your family? :D

I would appoint myself as the absolute leader of the group, and if anyone objected, I would murder them with the cinderblock.

After that, I have no idea what I would do.

I would take the stick, make a spear out of it with the cinderblock, and kill the zombies one by one. Hey, zombies can't run, remember? they can barely walk!

I would divide by zero and pray that it doesn't backfire on me jinxing it so that it invariably will. But, as the protagonist, I'll make my way through it.

I'd ditch the stick and cinderblock and start shuffling around and moaning, so by the time the zombies reached me they would think I was one of them. Once they were gone I'd cry over the corpses of my dead (or probably zombified) family for 0.2 seconds and get to a car to drive away.
Or I could wound one of my family with the stick, pin them with the cinderblock, and run away as fast as I could.

Use the cinder block as a shield, the stick as a spear, then go SPARTAAAAA on the zombies.

Leonidas won in the end....right? *looks around nervously*

Id change the Channel...

Easy.

Lock the front door.

Lock the back door. Use stick and cinderblock to make sure that basement door stays shut.

After that, I'm safe. My house is elevated enough so that the windows can't be reached from the ground outside.

Then I would eat some soup with my family.

If the Zombies somehow got in, we could all just go up to the attic and pull the ladder/door up after us. And the need for this retreat would be unlikely.


The scenario is odd, though, because if it's my house, that would mean that my family's vast assortment of tools would be accessible.

Dive in and go wild.

Rule 1: stay away from zombies.
Rule 2: if zombies cannot be avoided, aim for head. Cinder blocks can crush skulls, so a cinder block could be used as a blunt weapon.
Rule 3: zombies created by a viral infection of some sort are reanimated dead people. They don't remember anything. Not fire, friends, or f- well, they seem to remember food, and you're it. Kill them or be killed.
Rule 4: a stick, if reasonably long and sturdy, can be used like a spear to crack skulls. Speak softly and carry a big stick, right? 6' ash pole it is. Thrust the end at a zombie's noggin and you can squash his skull.