NationStates Jolt Archive

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351866,00.html

Ridiculous. Stupid Dutch causing global warming and freaking people out.

Along with Eco therapy (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351353,00.html) it won't be long before people are killing themselves so they can be buried in an eco-friendly coffin so they won't be a burden on the earth anymore.

Along with Eco therapy (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351353,00.html) it won't be long before people are killing themselves so they can be buried in an eco-friendly coffin so they won't be a burden on the earth anymore.

I support that.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351866,00.html

Ridiculous. Stupid Dutch causing global warming and freaking people out.

Along with Eco therapy (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351353,00.html) it won't be long before people are killing themselves so they can be buried in an eco-friendly coffin so they won't be a burden on the earth anymore.

One visitor, Linda McDowall, admired another coffin bundled in a beige, leaf-adorned felt shroud, saying it looked comfortable.

Who cares if the coffin is comfortable, the occupant is dead?

Wouldn't it be simpler to bury us without coffins?

A cardboard coffin really doesn't sound like that bad of an idea. From my point of view, once I'm dead, I'm dead, and preserving this old hunk o' meat for two hundred years really doesn't mean much. It's probably cheaper than a fancy-pants Eternal Rester 9100 (r), too.

Ridiculous. Stupid Dutch causing global warming and freaking people out.

*raises eyebrow*
Where are the Dutchies in this story ?

Wouldn't it be simpler to bury us without coffins?
:D
A cardboard coffin really doesn't sound like that bad of an idea. From my point of view, once I'm dead, I'm dead, and preserving this old hunk o' meat for two hundred years really doesn't mean much. It's probably cheaper than a fancy-pants Eternal Rester 9100 (r), too.
My thoughts as well...

*raises eyebrow*
Where are the Dutchies in this story ?

They're not, but global climate change is part of their nefarious plan to take over the world... http://i236.photobucket.com/albums/ff315/Sarothai/Smileys/nod.gif

They're not, but global climate change is part of their nefarious plan to take over the world... http://i236.photobucket.com/albums/ff315/Sarothai/Smileys/nod.gif

Indeed. Think about it. Who has the most to gain from Global Warming? The Dutch. When the icecaps melt the Dutch will be safe behind their inflatable dams and amphibious houses until the waters recede, and then they will take over the world from its drowned inhabitants.

Though, at this rate, they don't need the floods...they just need to wait for everyone to get all eco-nutty and kill themselves for the good of the earth.

A cardboard coffin really doesn't sound like that bad of an idea. From my point of view, once I'm dead, I'm dead, and preserving this old hunk o' meat for two hundred years really doesn't mean much. It's probably cheaper than a fancy-pants Eternal Rester 9100 (r), too.

That's a fair deal. But the potential for some to spend thousands on eco-friendly coffins is silly.

I think when I die, I want a huge monument that carries me around and eats trees to power itself as it roams the earth, telling everyone how awesome I was when I was alive.

With an emphasis there on how it eats trees.



And baby seals.

Soylent products would make it more eco-friendly.

when i snuff it i'm getting myself burned in a crematorium that's hooked up to the national grid. none of those tree products for me. i hope such a crematorium exists otherwise i might just have to get myself on a pyre that'll produce a heat source for the party.

Soylent products would make it more eco-friendly.

What if the secret ingredient of Slurm is people!?

What if the secret ingredient of Slurm is people!?

That makes it even more eco-friendly.

What if the secret ingredient of Slurm is people!?

That would take away the need for coffins entirely.

I would like to be buried feet first like a tree food spike, right under a newly planted fruit tree.

Bonus points to anyone who gets the literary reference. It's not a bad idea though anyways.

Psh, Fuck Coffins...

Im bein Cremated Bitches, lol...:gundge:

That makes it even more eco-friendly.

Fail.

That would take away the need for coffins entirely.

And fail.

The correct response was:

"No, they already have a cola like that. It's called Soylent Cola."

To which the proper response is:

"Oh, how is it?"

To which the proper response is:

"It varies from person to person."

I want my body compressed into a diamond, etched with "Here lies <me>, as hard in death as he was in life." in very small almost imperceptible lettering. Then, I wish to be given to someone who would find it utterly disturbing, and them not be told what the diamond is.

When they had it appraised, the jeweler would find the etching, leaving the person shocked and mortified. Bonus points if s/he screams and/or faints.

One final joke.

...it won't be long before people are killing themselves so they can be buried in an eco-friendly coffin so they won't be a burden on the earth anymore.

Isn't that what AlGore and the eco-terrorists want? For all of us to kill ourselves and save the planet? Perhaps they should lead the way instead of playing Chicken Little. :mad:

Isn't that what AlGore and the eco-terrorists want? For all of us to kill ourselves and save the planet? Perhaps they should lead the way instead of playing Chicken Little. :mad:

No, they want to play on people's fear in order to tax us more and sell us bogus 'carbon credits'. If we all kill ourselves there will be nobody to make Al and Co. rich.

Screw coffins, screw cardboard coffins

when i die im going to be buried in an underground stone mausoleum in siberia,
where i hope no-one ever finds me:D

Screw coffins, screw cardboard coffins

when i die im going to be buried in an underground stone mausoleum in siberia,
where i hope no-one ever finds me:D

At that point screw being buried...it's Siberia, no one is going to find you. And that's assuming they actually stay there long enough to try.

Who cares if the coffin is comfortable, the occupant is dead?

Indeed. Dump all the bodies in a mass grave. Cheaper, easier, uses less space, and is better for the environment.

I want my body compressed into a diamond, etched with "Here lies <me>, as hard in death as he was in life." in very small almost imperceptible lettering. Then, I wish to be given to someone who would find it utterly disturbing, and them not be told what the diamond is.

I'd love to be made into a diamond. There's a company that actually extracts the carbon from your body and compresses the molecules to make a diamond. They also do pets.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LifeGem
http://lifegem.com

WTF?!?
Biodegradable coffins also differ from the traditional mahogany.
isn't Mahogany biodegradable? just don't treat it with chemicals and polish!

Cardboard coffins—which are as thick as their wooden counterparts—can be decorated by family and biodegrade within three months. and so can wooden coffins...
and what happens after the three months... the body will still be there...
so why does it matter that the coffin degrades within three months?

The cemetery was a pasture when it opened in 1995. It is now speckled with more than 1,600 trees that mark plots along with a wooden plaque.
So wood is ok for a plaque, but not for a coffin? can you say a reason to increase costs?

Marble tombstones are frowned upon. Jeremy Smite, a funeral director at Green Endings, notes that shipping and mining produce carbon and that marble is not a renewable resource. and a waste since Marble will last for a LOOOOONG time but the coffin will be gone in three months and the wooden plaque can be worn away...

Particular care is taken in how coffins are buried at eco-friendly graveyards like Oakfield Wood, Peacock said.
why? what difference does it make how these coffins are buried... why can't they use trees to mark the spots where normal coffins are buried?

For cremations—which account for 70 percent of British funerals—a person's ashes and the remains of the eco-friendly coffin are placed in bamboo, glass or ceramic urns.
so you spend the money for a cardboard coffin only to burn it and put it in a bamboo, glass or ceramic urn?

since when is bamboo, glass and ceramic more eco-friendly than wood?

New legislation in Britain requires reductions in the mercury content of plastics and treatments used in coffins starting in 2010. this is sound. a great idea.
All biodegradable coffins meet the new standards.
??? so biodegradable coffins DON'T meet this standard NOW? what makes them better than wooden coffins? the fact that the plot will be empty after three months?

(of course, the person's bones will still be there... so why a biodegradable coffin, why not, as others said, bury them without a coffin?)

Cassidy said small details are important for green funerals, such as using smaller cars instead of limousines in funeral processions.
"yeah, that cardboard box strapped on the top of the compact is the deceased..." :p

"What people are wanting is to know that they're doing the best they can both for their loved ones and for the environment," Cassidy said. the best... we got daddy the best cardboard woven casket money can buy, no marbel tombstone, just a wooden plaque, no embalming, we just kept him on ice untill the funeral... all the best for daddy... :rolleyes:

this just smacks of a money making scheme feeding off of the eco-friendly movement.

I'd love to be made into a diamond. There's a company that actually extracts the carbon from your body and compresses the molecules to make a diamond. They also do pets.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LifeGem
http://lifegem.com

gives new meaning to the term "Family Jewels"

gives new meaning to the term "Family Jewels"

hah! =) sure does

I'd love to be made into a diamond. There's a company that actually extracts the carbon from your body and compresses the molecules to make a diamond. They also do pets.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LifeGem
http://lifegem.com

That's just fucking cool. I also wonder how much fossil fuel has to be burned for the process...I might want this instead of my tree-eating robot monument...

Hell, I'll just get the tree-eating robot to carry my diamond-ized body around.

Who cares if the coffin is comfortable, the occupant is dead?

Who wants to wake up for the apocalypse/zombie rising/etc with a crick in their back?

That's just fucking cool. I also wonder how much fossil fuel has to be burned for the process...I might want this instead of my tree-eating robot monument...

Hell, I'll just get the tree-eating robot to carry my diamond-ized body around.

Just have it carry an empty coffin and/or one filled with traps. That way when someone tries to steal it: Surprise!

Your real body can be in two glittering diamonds in the thing's eye-sockets.

Your real body can be in two glittering diamonds in the thing's eye-sockets.

You mean one diamond in one eye-socket, with the other being normal but horrendously cursed. Just to throw an element of luck into the grave-robbery.

So that want to go back too something greener?

Well, I got a good idea.

Viking burial time.

*Randomly grabs a guy and throws him in a pyre.*

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351866,00.html

Ridiculous. Stupid Dutch causing global warming and freaking people out.

Along with Eco therapy (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351353,00.html) it won't be long before people are killing themselves so they can be buried in an eco-friendly coffin so they won't be a burden on the earth anymore.

I fail to see anything wrong with these ... what is the problem with potentially cheaper or at least more environmental method for burial

I don't wish to be buried at all. I don't suppose I'll care though.

I'm considering cork or bamboo floors at my new place though, they are a bit more expensive, but they are much more friendly than hardwood floors.

Along with Eco therapy (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351353,00.html) it won't be long before people are killing themselves so they can be buried in an eco-friendly coffin so they won't be a burden on the earth anymore.
Chairman Bob APPROVES.

I wish I had a scan of one of those "Chairman Bob APPROVED" signs. I have the sign, just haven't scanned it.

On the one hand, I think it's helpful in grieving to make some sacrifice (of time or money) ... but I don't see why that has to involve material resources like slabs of marble or big mahogany boxes. Perhaps spending a bit of time composing a song or just dressing really carefully is more sincere than digging deep for pompous accoutrements.

That kind of symbolism is rather obsolete in our crowded world.

I don't like cardboard, but the wicker coffin looks fine to me.

I don't wish to be buried at all. I don't suppose I'll care though.

I'm considering cork or bamboo floors at my new place though, they are a bit more expensive, but they are much more friendly than hardwood floors.

Bamboo floors are great and if you get the odd termite they don't eat em.

Bamboo floors are great and if you get the odd termite they don't eat em.

Really? If so, that's something to keep in mind...

Really? If so, that's something to keep in mind...

I lived on a commune for a while where we built just about everything from bamboo (that or mud). If you're doing it yourself, you have to heat-treat the bamboo because it has it's own kind of borer. Another thing to watch out for is the dust when you cut it, has silicate or something in it.

It really is amazing stuff, brittle across the grain but with fantastic strength-to-weight in the right direction (comparable to steel I believe.) It's also very wear-resistant so I guess if milled flat it would make a good floor.

Isn't there a health risk associated with human bodies decaying directly into the soil?

Isn't there a health risk associated with human bodies decaying directly into the soil?

That could be why my grandma always told me not to sleep in the graveyard ...

A cardboard coffin really doesn't sound like that bad of an idea. From my point of view, once I'm dead, I'm dead, and preserving this old hunk o' meat for two hundred years really doesn't mean much. It's probably cheaper than a fancy-pants Eternal Rester 9100 (r), too.

Have you considered Cryonics?

Isn't there a health risk associated with human bodies decaying directly into the soil?

That's where they decay anyway. It just takes a lot longer if the box they're in is made of a hard wood instead of cardboard. I wouldn't think there would be any more risk of a human body decaying into the soil than any other biological material doing so.

That's where they decay anyway. It just takes a lot longer if the box they're in is made of a hard wood instead of cardboard. I wouldn't think there would be any more risk of a human body decaying into the soil than any other biological material doing so.

Knowing what anaerobic decomposition SMELLS like, I can't help thinking that the best solution might be to let some air at the body and those robust aerobic bacteria deal with everything. Not out in the open air where it can waft away, of course.

There's plenty of nasty stuff (foot-and-mouth, tetanus, even plague) in the soil anywhere, and it doesn't give us too much trouble.

But then there's prions (eg CJD,) and we don't really understand them well enough to be sure. Bacteria won't kill them, quite possibly cremation won't kill them.

I think my grandma is right. Don't sleep in the graveyard.

Have you considered Cryonics?

It seems to have worked for Ron Paul. :D

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351866,00.html

Ridiculous. Stupid Dutch causing global warming and freaking people out.

Along with Eco therapy (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351353,00.html) it won't be long before people are killing themselves so they can be buried in an eco-friendly coffin so they won't be a burden on the earth anymore.


Bwhahaha you are funny. Whats your beef exactly with biodegradable coffins then?

Bwhahaha you are funny. Whats your beef exactly with biodegradable coffins then?

I try. It's just over the top, is all. I would think being dead is enough of lessening the burden on the earth...

Isn't there a health risk associated with human bodies decaying directly into the soil?

:confused:

Isn't there a health risk associated with human bodies decaying directly into the soil?

yes there is. you didn't you know that death of the person is 100% of all instances where human bodies decay directly into the soil? :eek: :p

Why bother with coffins? When I die, my body will be donated to a research facility. When they're through with it, I doubt there'll be much left. That can be cremated and scattered.

Can't get much more eco-friendly than that.

My body will be donated to a research facility.


*sprays ASD's corpse with that chemical used in the 'Return of the Living Dead' movies*

Why bother with coffins? When I die, my body will be donated to a research facility. When they're through with it, I doubt there'll be much left. That can be cremated and scattered.

Can't get much more eco-friendly than that.
yeah, me too. going to the body farm, going to decomp for science!

it won't be long before people are killing themselves so they can be buried in an eco-friendly coffin so they won't be a burden on the earth anymore.

What these tree-hugging green wackos should do is follow the example of the top nut on the PETA fruitcake, Ingrid Newkirk:

http://www.peta.org/feat/newkirk/will.html

They can have a big party, fire up the grill, and consume the remains of the dead greenies. Reminiscent of rabbits eating their own shit :p

What these tree-hugging green wackos should do is follow the example of the top nut on the PETA fruitcake, Ingrid Newkirk:

http://www.peta.org/feat/newkirk/will.html

They can have a big party, fire up the grill, and consume the remains of the dead greenies. Reminiscent of rabbits eating their own shit :p

Ho.
Ly.
Shit.

...What? (http://catsnstuff.files.wordpress.com/2007/05/dude-wait-what.jpg)

That's...kind of messed up.



Just kind of.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351866,00.html

Ridiculous. Stupid Dutch causing global warming and freaking people out.

Along with Eco therapy (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351353,00.html) it won't be long before people are killing themselves so they can be buried in an eco-friendly coffin so they won't be a burden on the earth anymore.

That girl's face scares me. :eek:

Ho.
Ly.
Shit.

...What? (http://catsnstuff.files.wordpress.com/2007/05/dude-wait-what.jpg)

That's...kind of messed up.



Just kind of.

Apparently human meat tastes rather like veal. Tasty.

Mind you, I'm all for protecting the environment and reducing pollution. But no one will ever convince me not to eat meat.

Apparently human meat tastes rather like veal. Tasty.

Mind you, I'm all for protecting the environment and reducing pollution. But no one will ever convince me not to eat meat.

You know...I say the same thing now, but in my head is an image of her getting BBQ'd and that just turns my stomach...

Damn that woman! Damn her and the Dutch both!

You know...I say the same thing now, but in my head is an image of her getting BBQ'd and that just turns my stomach...

Damn that woman! Damn her and the Dutch both!

I also picture her getting barbecued. What I don't picture is her being butchered. Her flesh being barbecued I picture just like any other pieces of meat, which is why it doesn't turn my stomach at all. Mmmmm... ribs and rump steak. I bet she'd be good with a nice marinade.

That could be why my grandma always told me not to sleep in the graveyard ...

That's where they decay anyway. It just takes a lot longer if the box they're in is made of a hard wood instead of cardboard. I wouldn't think there would be any more risk of a human body decaying into the soil than any other biological material doing so.

:confused:

yes there is. you didn't you know that death of the person is 100% of all instances where human bodies decay directly into the soil? :eek: :p

Well, I wouldn't claim to be an expert, it's just that whenever you hear of a natural disaster or the like there is always a risk of rescuers getting infections from the bodies. If people are buried in a coffin that doesn't 'protect' them adequately, then I would have thought you had a risk of such infections getting into the water table.

But, like I say, I'm no expert.

Well, I wouldn't claim to be an expert, it's just that whenever you hear of a natural disaster or the like there is always a risk of rescuers getting infections from the bodies. If people are buried in a coffin that doesn't 'protect' them adequately, then I would have thought you had a risk of such infections getting into the water table.

But, like I say, I'm no expert.

I think it's more because as a body decays openly, as in not buried, it attracts rodents and pests that carry deseases. you also have the 'rotting meat' condition that becomes a breeding ground for bacteria that can be harmful to a living human system.

as for infecting the water table, the same thing could be true when one buries a pet, or any other animal.

If a human body dies of a disease, that disease can get into the water table. It's not as big of a deal with pets because generally diseases that affect certain animals don't affect humans. This isn't that big of a deal today, though because generally people don't die of disease, it's cancer or heart problems or what have you, not smallpox.

If a human body dies of a disease, that disease can get into the water table. It's not as big of a deal with pets because generally diseases that affect certain animals don't affect humans. This isn't that big of a deal today, though because generally people don't die of disease, it's cancer or heart problems or what have you, not smallpox.

yeah, that too.

Why bother with coffins? When I die, my body will be donated to a research facility. When they're through with it, I doubt there'll be much left. That can be cremated and scattered.

Can't get much more eco-friendly than that.

When I was about twelve, I was on a bushwalk with a bunch of adults. Being a bolshy little shit, I was arguing with them about any old thing that came up, which around a campfire is just about anything imaginable.

Me: Being buried is a load of sentimental nonsense. I'm going to give my body to science!
Hostile greyhair: Yeah, but which branch of science? (applause, like that's a win)
Me: Astronomy. They deal with heavenly bodies.

Shortly after that, I went to bed. No-one was talking much any more.

=========

Apparently human meat tastes rather like veal.

veal
–noun
1. a calf raised for its meat, usually a milk-fed animal less than three months old.
2. the flesh of the calf as used for food.

from dictionary.com (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/veal)

Correcting your own statement is left as an exercise in good taste. ;)

============

If a human body dies of a disease, that disease can get into the water table. It's not as big of a deal with pets because generally diseases that affect certain animals don't affect humans. This isn't that big of a deal today, though because generally people don't die of disease, it's cancer or heart problems or what have you, not smallpox.

This post has an alarming tendency to make sense. Your spamming skills are slipping!

When I was about twelve, I was on a bushwalk with a bunch of adults. Being a bolshy little shit, I was arguing with them about any old thing that came up, which around a campfire is just about anything imaginable.

Me: Being buried is a load of sentimental nonsense. I'm going to give my body to science!
Hostile greyhair: Yeah, but which branch of science? (applause, like that's a win)
Me: Astronomy. They deal with heavenly bodies.

Shortly after that, I went to bed. No-one was talking much any more.

=========



veal
–noun
1. a calf raised for its meat, usually a milk-fed animal less than three months old.
2. the flesh of the calf as used for food.

from dictionary.com (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/veal)

Correcting your own statement is left as an exercise in good taste. ;)

============



This post has an alarming tendency to make sense. Your spamming skills are slipping!

Not sure what you're taking issue with... I'd thought that this was well known:

Prior to 1931, New York Times reporter William Buehler Seabrook, allegedly in the interests of research, obtained from a hospital intern at the Sorbonne a chunk of human meat from the body of a healthy human killed by accident, and cooked and ate it. He reported that, "It was like good, fully developed veal, not young, but not yet beef. It was very definitely like that, and it was not like any other meat I had ever tasted. It was so nearly like good, fully developed veal that I think no person with a palate of ordinary, normal sensitiveness could distinguish it from veal. It was mild, good meat with no other sharply defined or highly characteristic taste such as for instance, goat, high game, and pork have. The steak was slightly tougher than prime veal, a little stringy, but not too tough or stringy to be agreeably edible. The roast, from which I cut and ate a central slice, was tender, and in color, texture, smell as well as taste, strengthened my certainty that of all the meats we habitually know, veal is the one meat to which this meat is accurately comparable."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cannibalism

The article in question has sources cited, so no whining.

Not sure what you're taking issue with... I'd thought that this was well known:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cannibalism

Interesting, but I was only joking. Next time I make a baby-eating joke, I won't try to be such a smartarse about it.

The article in question has sources cited, so no whining.

I have never whined about any poster citing Wikipedia, I'm fine with it. If some "fact" in a linked article there is wrong, the onus is on the other party to show that with some other source, not whine about "wiki isn't a real source."

I think if Wikipedia had existed when I was a teen, I would have simply refused to go to school on the basis that school was taking time away from my studies :)

Interesting, but I was only joking. Next time I make a baby-eating joke, I won't try to be such a smartarse about it.



I have never whined about any poster citing Wikipedia, I'm fine with it. If some "fact" in a linked article there is wrong, the onus is on the other party to show that with some other source, not whine about "wiki isn't a real source."

I think if Wikipedia had existed when I was a teen, I would have simply refused to go to school on the basis that school was taking time away from my studies :)

Oh, sorry. I was wondering if you were irritated at me for using the term "veal" incorrectly or something.

And I wasn't saying that you specifically had, it's just a common thing to do, you know, to say "oh you can't use wiki as a source." I mean, really, you'd think that some people want you to check out a book from the library just to get a source for a post on a stupid internet forum.

This post has an alarming tendency to make sense. Your spamming skills are slipping!

Until you realize that I have actually managed to embed smallpox into the post.