NationStates Jolt Archive

What is the strangest Question you've ever been asked?

Feel free to answer such questions when people post them. I will.

"Would you rather have a bucket stuck to your hand or foot for a year?"

Texted by my friend in December during the holidays. Clearly very bored at the time.

My Mum - "Could you find me some pictures of two guys having sex online?"

Most. Disturbing. Day. EVAR.

My Mum - "Could you find me some pictures of two guys having sex online?"

Most. Disturbing. Day. EVAR.

This has just replaced the ending sequence of F.E.A.R. as what's going to keep me awake at night...

*shudder*

This question wasn't asked to me personally.

Do they use clothes in Puerto Rico?

It was asked to Franchesca (a friend of mine from Puerto Rico) in Finland, 1997.:D

My Mum - "Could you find me some pictures of two guys having sex online?"

Most. Disturbing. Day. EVAR.

Hard to beat that one...

Hard to beat that one...

This is one of those bittersweet victories I think :p

A cute girl walked straight up to me in school and asked "What color is your comb?". I answered "Black." and an awkward silence followed while I desperately tried to come up with anything interesting to add about my comb. Then the girl turned around and walked away as quickly as possible. Left to stand there and stare blankly while trying to make sense of the event I decided that was the strangest question ever.

What is the strangest Question you've ever been asked?

Feel free to answer such questions when people post them. I will.

"How the hell did you get a pager superglued to your scrotum?"

or one of my favorites:

"Where the fuck did you hide my clothes?"

:D

"What's the brand of your umbrella?"

Used as a pickup line for one of my friends.

"Do you sell stuffed deer here?"
To me as a shop assistant a few years back.

An uncle in New York asked me, as my grandfather's birth-day was approaching, whether there was anyplace nearby I could get a birth-day card. I thought he was crazy; I live in Parramatta, not out deep in the bush! When I challenged him, though, he said, "Well, I don't know what you have in Australia."
He was asking whether we have birth-day cards in Australia....

What is the strangest Question you've ever been asked?

what do you do all day on the Internet? (asked by a naive woman)

to which I replied (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWEjvCRPrCo)

it's more of an accusation really, but walking down the street one day, someone shouted from their car:
"YOU KILLED MY MOM!!"

I had no idea how to reply, besides "I'M SORRY!"

it's more of an accusation really, but walking down the street one day, someone shouted from their car:
"YOU KILLED MY MOM!!"

I had no idea how to reply, besides "I'M SORRY!"

:D

A simple yet unbelievably complex question I heard a small kid ask his parent once was:
"Why are you"

From what I remember the parents dodged that question pretty well.:p

My wife was once asked by a student at work (she's a teacher):
"When did the world turn colour?"

...when they invented technicolor?:p

LMAO!!:D

My wife was once asked by a student at work (she's a teacher):
"When did the world turn colour?"

"Have you ever masturbated?"

E-mailed to me by a 14 (or 15)-year-old girl.

not the strangest question but the most stupid:

my sister had to have part of her stomach removed a few years back, some time afterward the husband of a friend of hers asked "well you cant have children anyway because you only have half a stomach, right?"

my sister told him that it was the stupidest question she had ever been asked.

not the strangest question but the most stupid:

my sister had to have part of her stomach removed a few years back, some time afterward the husband of a friend of hers asked "well you cant have children anyway because you only have half a stomach, right?"

my sister told him that it was the stupidest question she had ever been asked.

...Does this guy also think you can eat with your vagina, and that oral sex can produce kids?

I had asked somebody where an elevator was, and she replied "Can you use the stairs instead?"

Um... no. I'm in a wheelchair, which, unless she was blind, was clearly visible!:rolleyes:

I had asked somebody where an elevator was, and she replied "Can you use the stairs instead?"

Um... no. I'm in a wheelchair, which, unless she was blind, was clearly visible!:rolleyes:

I remember pushing my sister (I was a teenager at the time) to the head of the line at the Baltimore Aquarium, past a long, long line of people who were there to get tickets to get in.

She has MS, and is a bit older than I am, and we joke a lot about her condition.

We were allowed to cut to the front because of her "handicap" and as soon as we had the tickets, I said, "Ok, Michelle, you can stand up now."

Lots of ugly looks from the people in line...

I'm quite sure that's not one of the most entertaining questions you'll find here in this topic but mine was "I'm sorry if I'm being insensitive, you do know what a fork is, don't you? I'm really not sure if you use forks in Turkey."

Question was asked by a grad student from the States and we were at an IRC room, chatting. I said "no, what is that? I googled it but couldn't find anything..."

Cheerio!

I remember pushing my sister (I was a teenager at the time) to the head of the line at the Baltimore Aquarium, past a long, long line of people who were there to get tickets to get in.

She has MS, and is a bit older than I am, and we joke a lot about her condition.

We were allowed to cut to the front because of her "handicap" and as soon as we had the tickets, I said, "Ok, Michelle, you can stand up now."

Lots of ugly looks from the people in line...LMFAO. I could just imagine. :p

lol some people are such idiots. I once had to carry a (male) friend down a flight of stairs because the elevator had broken sometime between us coming up in it and then realising we were on the wrong floor, was an interesting experience to say the least!That happened to me last semester!

Me and a friend were going to class together and the elevator was out of order, so we just stood/sat there for a while wondering how we were gonna get to class (mind you, he could have gone, but refused to leave me behind), so he just grabbed me out of the chair, walked up the stairs and sat me down, then pulled the chair up.

It was an interesting experience, and quite funny when people coming down the stairs saw it. :D

I had asked somebody where an elevator was, and she replied "Can you use the stairs instead?"

Um... no. I'm in a wheelchair, which, unless she was blind, was clearly visible!:rolleyes:

lol some people are such idiots. I once had to carry a (male) friend down a flight of stairs because the elevator had broken sometime between us coming up in it and then realising we were on the wrong floor, was an interesting experience to say the least!

A friend of my fiance once asked him why is it that when you put a lollipop on your hand it gets sticky but when you put it on your mouth, it doesn´t.:p

While working at the country newspaper, an old lady named Gerry (rest in peace) used to call us sporadically and talk the ear off anyone who was not steel-hearted enough to hang up on her. One time she called and asked me for information about an obituary (nevermind that she called the sports department) and rambled on in a long spiel about how much it sucks to get old that ended in, "Do you live anywhere near the cemetery? I can't take the bus. Can you drive me there?"

After politely explaining that I could not, in fact, drive her to a funeral, she went on to tell me how much pain she was in (a common topic of conversation) and ended the call with, "Oh well, I've already got one foot in the grave anyway."

A friend of my fiance once asked him why is it that when you put a lollipop on your hand it gets sticky but when you put it on your mouth, it doesn´t.:p

The answer to that is obvious...

It belongs in your mouth, not your hand ;)

My wife was once asked by a student at work (she's a teacher):
"When did the world turn colour?"
Better yet:
After being reminded of that "when did the world turn colour" question by my mention of this post just this morning, my wife chanced to mention it to a class today. One of the students then related that a friend in a science class had once adamantly refused to believe the world was round, arguing that "if the world is round, then why doesn't the water all just drip off?"

Better yet:
After being reminded of that "when did the world turn colour" question by my mention of this post just this morning, my wife chanced to mention it to a class today. One of the students then related that a friend in a science class had once adamantly refused to believe the world was round, arguing that "if the world is round, then why doesn't the water all just drip off?"

lol

Getting asked random questions is par for the course when you're a teacher, even more so when you teach in Japan.

I think the most random one I've been asked by my kids was, "Sensei, are you sky?" To this day I have NO idea what it was they were asking.

Other ones I've been asked in Japan, "How many guns do you have?" After replying I don't have any, "Oh, but don't Americans have to own guns?", "Do you have four seasons in America?", "I want to go America someday, can I see New York and LA in two days?", and of course the all time favorite, beloved by gaijins everywhere in Japan, "Can you use chopsticks?"

I also worked tech support at my university and my three favorite random questions (From kind souls who assumed that a university Help Desk MUST mean it can help with anything) are:
"Hey, there's an emu loose from a farm in my backyard. Animal control won't do anything so could you send over a few biology students to catch it?"

"A friend of mine's father has passed away, should I send a sympathy card addressed to her or her and her husband?"

And the number one: "When I die, I want to donate my body to you guys, how do I do that?"

"Do the stairs also go down?"

There is only one possible answer to that question: no, only sideways.

"So if i gave you a horse vibrator, would you wear that too?"
n/k

I've been asked many, many peculiar questions. This is merely the first to come to mind.

By a local when I visited Florida 8 years ago:

"What language do you speak in Australia?"

I was going to write that one, but I thought it was just too stupid even to mention.... Still, since you did:
American: Where are you from?
Australian: From Australia.
American: Yeah, that's what I thought I had heard. Say, what language do you guys speak over there?
Australian (incredulously): English. Why? Does it sound like I speak anything else?
American: Oh, we just thought you spoke really good English for a foreigner.

How about this one, asked by a VERY ignorant American on an on-line forum:
"Was America the first to have television and culture and that sort of thing?"

A cute girl walked straight up to me in school and asked "What color is your comb?". I answered "Black." and an awkward silence followed while I desperately tried to come up with anything interesting to add about my comb. Then the girl turned around and walked away as quickly as possible. Left to stand there and stare blankly while trying to make sense of the event I decided that was the strangest question ever.

Now, you can put this down to my dirty little mind, but... did she say "comb" or "cum"?

Now, you can put this down to my dirty little mind, but... did she say "comb" or "cum"?

This is what I was thinking as well.

My ex-girlfriend cam up with a couple of strange questions such as:

Where is Norwegia? When I questioned what the hell she was talking about she said "Norwegia, the country where Norwegians are from" I had to explain to her that Norwegians came from Norway and not Norwegia, I am not to sure if she entirely believed me though. (The saddest part is that she is now a high school teacher)

One night she came up with this beauty "Was I born in 1886 or 1986?" All I could do was laugh.

And this from someone who I used to work with she was looking at a way of getting home for Christmas as all the planes had been booked up, she came to me the next day saying that she spoke to her mum the last night who had came up with a solution she could hire a car and drive up, and that this is what she was going to do. I stared at her for a few minutes before reminding her that she doesn't know how to drive nor does she have a license. (Not a question I know but a conversation that has always stuck with me, along with a bunch of other equally stupid quotes that I have heard over the year)

Now, you can put this down to my dirty little mind, but... did she say "comb" or "cum"?
Comb, and those 2 words are not similar at all in Swedish.

Working on the information desk of the public library, I once had someone walk up to me and ask "Do you have any books?"

Comb, and those 2 words are not similar at all in Swedish.

Ah, ok. Didn't know that, sorry ;)

Working on the information desk of the public library, I once had someone walk up to me and ask "Do you have any books?"

A library classic - I always reply "No this is a fish shop".

I once had someone come into the library and ask if we had a section on bestiality.

Only one I can remember right now;

"Have you had your [cervical cancer] vaccine?"

I'm (clearly) male and this was to my face. Though in fairness AFAIK the vaccine is of some use to men.

When I was a butcher.

Lady: Excuse me, how much is that leg of lamb?
Me: Which one darling?
Lady: That one up there, that says £4.95.
Me: Ummm....£4.95 love.

The answer to that is obvious...

It belongs in your mouth, not your hand ;)

Yeah, it is quite obvious to you and to me, but not to my fiance's friend.:D

"Will you bear my child?" from a complete stranger on a bike...

Mine has to be:

Do they have Chritians in foreign places. Cos I thought it was the church of England?

"Will you bear my child?" from a complete stranger on a bike...

Best response: "Hell no, I can't even bear you."

"Doesn't that stink?" said to me while I was doing my (thankfully former) job as a cleaner of portable toilets.

A friend of my fiance once asked him why is it that when you put a lollipop on your hand it gets sticky but when you put it on your mouth, it doesn´t.:p

You're mouth has a certain material, so stuff doesnt get sticky...Or it's just wet all the time :D

You're mouth has a certain material, so stuff doesnt get sticky...Or it's just wet all the time :D

Saliva, yup.:D

"Will you bear my child?" from a complete stranger on a bike...
...not several incomplete strangers on NSG? :p

"Why is the TV upside down?"

What is the strangest Question you've ever been asked?

That question.

North American tourist asking about Xixón, Asturias:

Xixón, is that a Spanish dish? Can you eat it with wine?

To which I responded:

Xixón is not a dish, it's a city. Are you ok?

:sniper:

My daughter used to work in a vitamin store. A woman, who was browsing the multi-vitamin shelf picked up a bottle which had clearly printed on the label "one-a-day" and asked my daughter, "how often do you take these."

StrangeQuestions (tm) are a daily fate when you are an exchange student; this appears to run especially rampant with students who get sent to the US. My favorites have been:

So, do you ride polar bears to school, then? (To my Finnish exchange student partner in crime)

Are you allowed to drive other cars than Volkswagens in Germany? (To me)

When do you reckon will they introduce electricity to Japan? (My Japanese host sister)

How's your king, Hitler, doing these days? (NOT joking, and coming from a British teenager)

Would you like me to show you what a pizza is?


Other random, non-exchange related questions I rather enjoyed were

May I please measure your earlobe and your middle toe?

Ma'am, when you say here "Choose one out of these three questions" on number five, do you mean we have to do the first one?

And then there was this absolutely brilliant exchange I had with a student (remedial English) today:

He: "What's English for Zähne putzen?"
Me: "To brush one's teeth" *goes to write that on board*
He: *looks somewhat troubled* "Hmm.. so what's "one's"?"
Me: *realizes these kids are far more behind than I had thought* "It's a generalization we put in when we learn the word as a vocabulary item. When you write your text [they were supposed to write about how their morning went], you substitute it with "my, your, his/her/its, out, your, their" as appropriate." *goes to add a little arrow to the "one's" on the board and writes "my, your, his/her/its, out, your, their" next to it* "You understand?"
He: "Yes. Thanks." *continues writing*
[Time passes; the kids have finished their texts and I go round, checking them. I arrive at the desk of the aforementioned student]
Me: *realizes they are far, far more behind than I had thought. Also realizes an improvised grammar lesson is in order* "Okay, class, listen. I think I ought to explain the "one's" thing that's on the board again..."

... he had written "In the morning first I brush my, your, his/her/its, our, your, their teeth." He later explained he had thought from what I had said that one says "one's" in formal writing such as school books, and "my, your, his/her/its, our, your, their" in texts such as theirs. What saddened me most about all this was that quite apparently he had been so disillusioned by his experience with learning English so far, and internalized acceptance for this "OMG this all sounds like absolute gibberish to me" feeling so completely that it never occurred to him to question whether such as string of unconnected words really could be what he was looking for.

This question wasn't asked to me personally.

Do they use clothes in Puerto Rico?

It was asked to Franchesca (a friend of mine from Puerto Rico) in Finland, 1997.:D
"Do they have cars in Germany?"
Also not asked personally.

The stupidest question I've been asked was "You know it's in English, right?" after having showed the cashier at the movie theater my UVA ID for a rebate on a movie.

I had asked somebody where an elevator was, and she replied "Can you use the stairs instead?"

Um... no. I'm in a wheelchair, which, unless she was blind, was clearly visible!:rolleyes:

I get that all the time, too.;)


I remember pushing my sister (I was a teenager at the time) to the head of the line at the Baltimore Aquarium, past a long, long line of people who were there to get tickets to get in.

She has MS, and is a bit older than I am, and we joke a lot about her condition.

We were allowed to cut to the front because of her "handicap" and as soon as we had the tickets, I said, "Ok, Michelle, you can stand up now."

Lots of ugly looks from the people in line...

Good one. One of my favs is to challenge random people to a joust.:D

Good one. One of my favs is to challenge random people to a joust.:D

I always thought that would be cool. For a while I fenced, and I really wanted to someday see a wheelchair fencing bout. It probably wouldn't be that different from a traditional one.

The stupidest question I've been asked was "You know it's in English, right?" after having showed the cashier at the movie theater my UVA ID for a rebate on a movie.

I'll have to note that this is very relevant in Belgium, where any one movie can be shown in English, French or Dutch and unless you're clear about it, you might end up with a language you didn't expect :P

I did once, but solved that by just going to another room :P

...
Good one. One of my favs is to challenge random people to a joust.:D

You know i can see how someone might be thrown by a challenge like that.:p

In line at the ATM today ... (back story another time)
inattentive lady catching up: "Think you could stand any closer?"
me, reflexively: "Think you might at least buy me some flowers first?"
*went on about business unabated*

In line at the ATM today ... (back story another time)
inattentive lady catching up: "Think you could stand any closer?"
me, reflexively: "Think you might at least buy me some flowers first?"
*went on about business unabated*

Hahahaha.

That's happened to me before. I'm stealing that retort.

Also link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAknJSsXQRY

I'll have to note that this is very relevant in Belgium, where any one movie can be shown in English, French or Dutch and unless you're clear about it, you might end up with a language you didn't expect :P

I did once, but solved that by just going to another room :P'cept this theater only really shows things in Original Version, which was why I interpreted her remark as pertaining to my ability to speak and understand English =/

Today:
Say, what do you do with those Parliament guests that do not meet proper attire requirements?

Em... like, we don't let them inside... duh!

Today:
Say, what do you do with those Parliament guests that do not meet proper attire requirements?

Em... like, we don't let them inside... duh!

:eek:
That's bigoted against slovenly people
:mad:

:eek:
That's bigoted against slovenly people
:mad:

I understand, but it's Parliament, not the beach.;)

A new weird question: A fencing buddy comes-up to me and says: "Do you realize you are doing your retreats backwards?"

Hahahaha.

That's happened to me before. I'm stealing that retort.Don't you mean you're reclaiming that retort? :p
And if it were you, i probably would've offered the flowers, no hesitation.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAknJSsXQRY
So far, it's been just evil. :p
Funny how our House is having a closed door session on wiretapping. :eek: