NationStates Jolt Archive

Let us say that due to a freak accident involving a crate of tongue depressors, two gallons of whipped cream, a plate of chocolate chip cookies, and a very, very depraved walrus, all the NS Mods were laid low.

AND! While contemplating such a tragic turn of events, [Violet] gets knocked out by a flying wooden clog flung by a passing troop of wandering Irish clog dancers. Upon regaining consciousness (albeit slightly concussed), he/she/Max Berry decides that YOU are the perfect candidate to form the core of the new NS Mods. Heading straight away to his/her/Max Berry's computer he/she/Max Berry sends you a telegram with the password to the super secret Mod Cave and offers you the power of Mod.

So... would you take it? And what would you do with it before [Violet]'s concussion heals?

As for me, the not-so-serious answer is of course I would and hand out automatic bans for anyone who dares starts yet another Creationism vs Evolution thread.

The serious answer would be no, just don't have the time it would take.

Disclaimer: No Mods, Senior Admins, or walruses were harmed in the making of this post.

I'd give everyone post editing and deleting powers, and give people I like ban powers.

Since I'm hardly ever around, I'm not sure I would qualify.



Or would that make me extra qualified?

I'm a mod/assistant manager in a few groups, and thus am experienced with the threat of the "intarnet lawyer", death, mutilation and damnation that accompany the deletion of posts that start "Fuck yo momma...." on a religous topic....

Since I'm hardly ever around, I'm not sure I would qualify.



Or would that make me extra qualified?


Thats called 'keeping a light hand on the tiller'....

I have a tendency to abuse power, so yes.

I would if asked to. I would not myself ask to. If you get what I mean.

TOTAL COSMIC POWERRRRRRR


...wait...what ?

Oh who me, abuse my powers if I were a mod? Perish the thought, I'd never do anything like that. ;)

Oh who are we kidding, I'd abuse 'til the bastard was blue in the face.

back in the day i would have, but these days i'm not around as much. plus i'm bitter and would probably ban a few of you right off the bat just because i could :D

In all honesty, I think I would be a pretty good mod. I'm active on the forums (I frequently check several times a day), and I'd use my mod powerz sparingly. I might try to enforce a ban on posts written in atrocious English.

I've spent my entire internet/fourming carrer defyin the communist machine that controls the internet. I couln't turn on my fellow renagades.

I command about as much respect as a twig around here, being a mod would be such an uphill battle that it wouldn't be worth it on any level.

Yea I would become a Mod, and I would put an end to the abortion threads. I mean comon, you're not going to change anyone mind's on abortion. Abortion is one of those subject that either side refuse to budge on, and neither side will budge, EVER!

Let the universe howl in despair, for I am MOD!

I've spent my entire internet/fourming carrer defyin the communist machine that controls the internet. I couln't turn on my fellow renagades.
This guy. First against the ban wall when the revolution comes.

No, not the communist revolution. The Anti-"I'm so persecuted" Revolution.
Let the universe howl in despair, for I am MOD!

Bitch please, the universe's voice is ruined after all the howling it did when I became an admin.

No, not the communist revolution. The Anti-"I'm so persecuted" Revolution.


I am so joining that revolution. I'll be its Che fucking Gueverra, the guy who is creepily too into it...

If I was mod... damn, I'd pwn.

In a good way, of course.

*snip*

I would alter some people's names.

Ifreann would become Ilfreann, because that's how I always see it.

Nobel Hobos would become Nigel Hobos, it sounds better.

Fassitude would become Fussitude because I prefer it.

There's others as well, mark my words.

EDIT: Oh yeah, given the OP, you'd be Nervun - your capitalization piques me.

Barry. Max Barry.

Also: believe, atheist, grammar, masturbation, European, necessary, relevant, and definitely.

I am so joining that revolution. I'll be its Che fucking Gueverra, the guy who is creepily too into it...
We'll put your face on some t-shirts too. It won't be as ironic as Che, but we'll still make money. Revolutions aren't cheap you know!
I would alter some people's names.

Ifreann would become Ilfreann, because that's how I always see it.

Nobel Hobos would become Nigel Hobos, it sounds better.

Fassitude would become Fussitude because I prefer it.

There's others as well, mark my words.

Fun fun fun

Fun fun fun

I'd also lengthen my own name and then DoS anyone who abbreviated it.

Barr - I can't remember who it was but they're outta here!

I'd also lengthen my own name and then DoS anyone who abbreviated it.

Barr - I can't remember who it was but they're outta here!

I'm calling you Baz from now on. Maybe Bazza.

I'm calling you Baz from now on. Maybe Bazza.

Damn you Ilfreann!

Damn you Ilfreann!

:fluffle:

Does it involve wearing fish-tail parkas and riding a scooter?

:fluffle:

Fluffles won't save you - time ticks on your abbreviating ways.

Does it involve wearing fish-tail parkas and riding a scooter?

No one wants to join your scooter gang.

I'd also lengthen my own name and then DoS anyone who abbreviated it.

Barr - I can't remember who it was but they're outta here!

What if we alter it to "Ringtone"? That's what always pops into my mind when I see your handle..

What if we alter it to "Ringtone"? That's what always pops into my mind when I see your handle..

AWESOME!

What if we alter it to "Ringtone"? That's what always pops into my mind when I see your handle..

*writes down SoWiBi on list*

I am curious as to what SoWiBi stands for though, it might get you off the list if explained.

As someone who has had moderator and/or admin powers on other boards, I'd take it. I might not use it, but I'd take it.

I command about as much respect as a twig around here, being a mod would be such an uphill battle that it wouldn't be worth it on any level.

it would be fun to watch from the outside when you went from everyone's favorite hippy uncle to he who must be sucked up to at any cost.

(im not saying that i think you would change, just that people tend to overreact to mods)

im not interested in rule enforcement myself. i would last a week and get fired for telling everyone who complains in the moderation forum to grow the fuck up and put whoever they are whining about on ignore.

*writes down SoWiBi on list*

I am curious as to what SoWiBi stands for though, it might get you off the list if explained.

Hah! I made it onto the exquisite guest list! ...right?


That's somewhat simple: I originally made this nation as part of a project for a uni class... SoWi is the commonplace abbreviation for my major (SozialWissenschaften = Social Sciences), and Bi is the official abbreviation for my town, Bielefeld (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bielefeld).

Barry. Max Barry.

Also: believe, atheist, grammar, masturbation, European, necessary, relevant, and definitely.

Don't forget intelligence.

What if we alter it to "Ringtone"? That's what always pops into my mind when I see your handle..

Great. Now I read it like that, too. Thanks for nothing. :rolleyes:

Don't forget intelligence.

I don't. They do!


Which reminds me: thread, legislation, democracy, and friend.

And loose/lose.

TOTALLY DIFFERENT WORDS, PEOPLE!

Power...

Noooo....


*Tears up, runs away.*

Disclaimer: No Mods, Senior Admins, or walruses were harmed in the making of this post.Yeah, but what about the whipped cream?

Yeah, but what about the whipped cream?

It got eaten.

I'd give everyone post editing and deleting powers, and give people I like ban powers.

That's the best idea ever.

It got eaten.

In my defense, I had not yet eaten breakfast, so I was very hungry.

This guy. First against the ban wall when the revolution comes.

No, not the communist revolution. The Anti-"I'm so persecuted" Revolution.


Go to Civilization Fanatics Forums, then take a right-wing stance. You'll then understand.

If I where a mod, I would immediately discard all rules, even for myself.

I command about as much respect as a twig around here, being a mod would be such an uphill battle that it wouldn't be worth it on any level.

I don't remember having a lot of respect in General before I accepted the Mod position.

I don't think it hurts to have the respect of the community, but you can always gain it by being fair after becoming a Mod. In theory, at least.

I'd very much like to help out around here, and I'm certain I could make a difference. But for the time being I'm busy with college; best not to be distracted.

Maybe if they needed help in the summer :p.

and babysit this bunch of delinquent self-styled bunch of psuedo-intellectuals?

I think not.

Hell no.

I'd leave them all to their own devices.

lase faire. Then fry their asses at random for abitrary reasons.

Everyone would be scared shitless.:cool:

That's somewhat simple: I originally made this nation as part of a project for a uni class... SoWi is the commonplace abbreviation for my major (SozialWissenschaften = Social Sciences), and Bi is the official abbreviation for my town, Bielefeld (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bielefeld).

How disappointing. You aren't a white woman from the South of the USA, then?
For some reason, I always imagine you typing standing up. Is that wrong too?

I'd give everybody avatars, but I'd choose the avatars, so if I wanted to turn somebody into a toad, I could.

And I'd choose a Sig of the Month and paste it at the top of the forums, and I'd have a newsline feeding across the top that'd mix real world news in with NS news so people would occasionally misread it and think that the Pope had approved gay marriage and NSG had signed Kyoto (well, it more or less has, but still).

And I'd make the yellow in the colour palette darker so I could read Ifreann's sig properly on my cheap monitor and not see KU URZ every time he posts.

And if people annoyed me (especially ones with high post-counts), I'd put them back on moderated posts, and they'd have to wait forever for their clever retort to appear, and then it wouldn't seem so clever, or even make sense, HAH!

And I'd make HotRodia stop hogging the whipped cream, if I were a ...

oh. sorry, I forgot. All right, all right, already, you don't have to shout ...

Yes. I would. There are a few flamers who'd get banned quite shortly. I'd also get a cool looking avatar. Yeah.

I would resign immediately, pleading insanity.

I'd slap Violet in the face and tell him/her/Max Barry to actually think before picking someone next time.

I don't think I could be impartial enough to moderate this forum. Too many posters just really get under my skin.

I'd give everybody avatars, but I'd choose the avatars, so if I wanted to turn somebody into a toad, I could.

And I'd choose a Sig of the Month and paste it at the top of the forums, and I'd have a newsline feeding across the top that'd mix real world news in with NS news so people would occasionally misread it and think that the Pope had approved gay marriage and NSG had signed Kyoto (well, it more or less has, but still).

And I'd make the yellow in the colour palette darker so I could read Ifreann's sig properly on my cheap monitor and not see KU URZ every time he posts.

And if people annoyed me (especially ones with high post-counts), I'd put them back on moderated posts, and they'd have to wait forever for their clever retort to appear, and then it wouldn't seem so clever, or even make sense, HAH!

And I'd make HotRodia stop hogging the whipped cream, if I were a ...

oh. sorry, I forgot. All right, all right, already, you don't have to shout ...


wow i wish you were a mod!

I'd give every poster on NS a million dollars and a pony, and improve NSG by making it more graphical, e.g. by adapting it to the Quake 3 engine.

I've got sillier ideas than that, but I'm keeping them secret for now.

wow i wish you were a mod!

Yeah, Ardchoille is just this kid who hacked Jolt. ;)

Frankly, though, I like toads and amphibians of all sorts ... I'd be as irritating as possible, trying to attract the toading.

Yeah, Ardchoille is just this kid who hacked Jolt. ;)

Frankly, though, I like toads and amphibians of all sorts ... I'd be as irritating as possible, trying to attract the toading.


You're using the conditional tense there?:p

I've already come up with your avatar. It's the Charlie Chaplin tramp with Einstein's head photoshopped on.

You're using the conditional tense there?:p

I've already come up with your avatar. It's the Charlie Chaplin tramp with Einstein's head photoshopped on.

What would I be? What would I be?

Hell no.
Yeah, just like Ruffy said!!

...a crate of tongue depressors, two gallons of whipped cream, a plate of chocolate chip cookies, and a very, very depraved walrus, ... a flying wooden clog flung by a passing troop of wandering Irish clog dancers...

If all that happened and THEN I was named mod, I would cry and cry and cry because I hadn't been around for the days when secret mod parties were really cool.

Then I would go out and acquire a vat of rubber cement, thirty five pounds of tacos, a zonkey (half donkey, half zebra), a Tinkerbell costume, a sixteen piece all bagpipe orchestra, 68 bags of M&M's and a Boy Scout Troop and throw my own party.

Oh, and I would invite anyone from NSG who wanted in.














If there were any survivors, we would all sign a get well card for the mods.







And the walrus.

What would I be? What would I be?

Well, surely, You'd Be The Walrus, koo-koo-ka-choo ...

(Re-reading the OP, I realise I've just said you're very depraved. I shall now go and clean out the moderated posts queue as penance.)

I'd hunt down the Max Headroom video pirate and grant him the power to ban Chuck Swirsky and all the fuckin' liberals. Oh, Jesus! Catch the wave. [screams and moans]

TOTAL COSMIC POWERRRRRRR


...wait...what ?

Iiiiiitty-bitty living space.

Iiiiiitty-bitty living space.

Oh, thank you! I knew it was from something but I couldn't remember what until you said that.

Oh, thank you! I knew it was from something but I couldn't remember what until you said that.

Yes, the secret is out....

This mod watches lots of Disney animation. :)

[hijack](speaking of, I like the 3-d CGI stuff but.... I'm Jonesing for the good old-fashioned 2-d drawn stuff.)[/hijack done]

"Now I am become Mod, the destroyer of posts."
I would, who wouldn't enjoy abusing the banhammer for a couple days, and there's a couple people I'd really enjoy banning, too.

How disappointing. You aren't a white woman from the South of the USA, then?
For some reason, I always imagine you typing standing up. Is that wrong too?

Call me disappointing once more and I'll.. oh, there are mods in the thread, no?

Anyhow, no, I'm a woman, and usually classified as white, but I have no association whatsoever with the Southern USA.

That, and I usually type sitting in my desk chair with my left leg in the crossed-legs position and my right leg in the hugging-leg-to-chest position, so you're wrong on that count, too, yes.

Sure. It would be one more step towards world domination.

EDIT: Oh yeah, given the OP, you'd be Nervun - your capitalization piques me.
Touch my capitalization and I send an EVA to put an AT Field somewhere very uncomfortable. ;)

I don't think a libertarian could be a mod. I'd just sit on the sidelines and tell people to sort their stuff out themselves, while ridiculing the PG-13 rule.

So I couldn't be bothered, and they wouldn't want me, just like a welfare department wouldn't want a minarchist party in government.

Let us say that due to a freak accident involving a crate of tongue depressors, two gallons of whipped cream, a plate of chocolate chip cookies, and a very, very depraved walrus, all the NS Mods were laid low.

AND! While contemplating such a tragic turn of events, [Violet] gets knocked out by a flying wooden clog flung by a passing troop of wandering Irish clog dancers. Upon regaining consciousness (albeit slightly concussed), he/she/Max Berry decides that YOU are the perfect candidate to form the core of the new NS Mods. Heading straight away to his/her/Max Berry's computer he/she/Max Berry sends you a telegram with the password to the super secret Mod Cave and offers you the power of Mod.

So... would you take it? And what would you do with it before [Violet]'s concussion heals?

As for me, the not-so-serious answer is of course I would and hand out automatic bans for anyone who dares starts yet another Creationism vs Evolution thread.

The serious answer would be no, just don't have the time it would take.

Disclaimer: No Mods, Senior Admins, or walruses were harmed in the making of this post.

This "freak accident" you speak of would not involve anything so crude as "tongue depressors", "whipped cream", "chocolate chip cookies", or any "walrus", but rather my eye lasers.

And as for this "[violet]", s/he would not be knocked out by any "flying wooden clog" or any "passing troop of wandering Irish clog dancers", but by ME, General Zod, your rightful leader!

And, of course, I would immediately assume this "power of Mod" you speak of, should such a thing happen, and then shoot the person who started this "thread" with my eye lasers for misspelling my name ("Mod"), because my name is not "Mod"; it is ZOD!

My first official action as what you humans call "Mod" would be to eye-laser (via your computer screens) those of you defiant cowards who do not kneel before me!

OOC: Shoot eye-lasers at people from their computer screens! ROFL

That'd be a neat trick if I could really do it!

Mmm, I'd be too lenient on spam, s'eh...

Also, I might mess with some sigs a bit.

"Now I am become Mod, the destroyer of posts."
I would, who wouldn't enjoy abusing the banhammer for a couple days, and there's a couple people I'd really enjoy banning, too.

Like who, for example?

I would not take it because then people would be scareda me, and I would be sad because it is lonely at the top.

*looks stoically into the distance as a chilly breeze blows her hair*

Let us say that due to a freak accident involving a crate of tongue depressors, two gallons of whipped cream, a plate of chocolate chip cookies, and a very, very depraved walrus, all the NS Mods were laid low.

AND! While contemplating such a tragic turn of events, [Violet] gets knocked out by a flying wooden clog flung by a passing troop of wandering Irish clog dancers. Upon regaining consciousness (albeit slightly concussed), he/she/Max Berry decides that YOU are the perfect candidate to form the core of the new NS Mods. Heading straight away to his/her/Max Berry's computer he/she/Max Berry sends you a telegram with the password to the super secret Mod Cave and offers you the power of Mod.

So... would you take it? And what would you do with it before [Violet]'s concussion heals?

As for me, the not-so-serious answer is of course I would and hand out automatic bans for anyone who dares starts yet another Creationism vs Evolution thread.

The serious answer would be no, just don't have the time it would take.

Disclaimer: No Mods, Senior Admins, or walruses were harmed in the making of this post.

You really should have included an "H N Fiddlebottoms VIII is Max Barry" option.

Or maybe a "[violet] is Max Barry".

As much as there are humorous responses, yes I would like to join them if I had the opportunity. I am around a lot, enjoy the place and would like to help continue to keep it a place people like to come to discuss.

So I'd get to edit and delete other people's posts and ban people? ooohh...

As for the whole poll option thing, I'm already a poll option (well, I was at least...) on most polls...

I would resign immediately, pleading insanity.

Smart person, Saevitian Archipelago is. Listen and learn from them.

So... would you take it?

I'll take the serious answer (Hell no, I won't go!) for $1000, Alex...

And what would you do with it before [Violet]'s concussion heals?

William Tecumseh Sherman said it best: “If nominated I will not accept; if elected I will not serve.”

Lordy! My Nana's whole side of the family are spinning in their graves at my quoting Sherman in a positive way, I'm sure. Allow me to settle their restless memories - G.D.YANKEEYS! There that ought to do it.

Hell no.

I'd give it a try. Not going near II or NS though, they scare me.

I'd give it a try. Not going near II or NS though, they scare me.

Why? NS is fun and II is just kinda dumb.

Touch my capitalization and I send an EVA to put an AT Field somewhere very uncomfortable. ;)

Why not send three?

I'd treat it like all the other places I have modded... I'd do my job and wouldn't complain to anyone from NS about it.

Why? NS is fun and II is just kinda dumb.

Its the whole - I shall send 10,000,000 infantry and 3000 fighter jets to invade your lands - malarkey. I find it a bit scary that anyone can say that with a straight face. Writing stories about places, I can handle. But the play armies just freak me out.

Its the whole - I shall send 10,000,000 infantry and 3000 fighter jets to invade your lands - malarkey. I find it a bit scary that anyone can say that with a straight face. Writing stories about places, I can handle. But the play armies just freak me out.

That's mostly II. And it's not scary, just stupid.

As for me, the not-so-serious answer is of course I would and hand out automatic bans for anyone who dares starts yet another Creationism vs Evolution thread.

But are mods created, or do they crawl out of primordial sludge? The people deserve to know!

But are mods created, or do they crawl out of primordial sludge? The people deserve to know!

The mods created the primordial sludge. LG crawled out of it. :D

Hell no. Too much work and I hate the cults.

*stocks up on whipped-cream and hides The Bucket in moderation*