NationStates Jolt Archive

The Daily Mail, arguably the UK's worst rag, popular mainly because it blathers on about how immigrants are destroying society, is being accused of having tried to fabricate evidence of bad driving by Polish immigrants.


'Beatroot', a Polish blogger who lives in Warsaw, recently posted an item about the time Sue Reid of the 'Daily Mail' got in contact. "Ms Reid said that she would offer me £800 to come over and park illegally and speed – just 10 miles an hour over the speed limit, no more... " wrote Beatroot. "We would then go back to Poland and wait for the demands for payment of the fines... the 'Mail' would publish the whole thing as an exclusive, on how Poles and others are breaking the law in the UK and getting away with it." Beatroot declined.


(link (http://news.independent.co.uk/media/article3127314.ece))

Well, as long as there are xenophobic readers willing to lap up any kind of nonsense, I doubt the Mail would hesitate long between honesty and profit.

Big surprise there... :p

It doesn't surprise me that the Daily Mail are shitty enough of a 'newspaper' to make up stories. What surprises me is that they were stupid enough to think this would work.

Well let's see, due to the existence of the EU, they could in fact be fined.

The only question that then remains is: Are the british police willing to bother fining someone who drove 10 miles above the speed limit?

I mean, is the postage going to cost more than the fine? :p

Heard about this a few days ago. Absolutely and completely unsurprised, and as long as their political opponents do not sink to similar levels they will hold an undisputable and immense moral high ground.

We must now assume that every anti-immigration stunt in the tabloid media is based on a pack of self-serving lies. As far as I'm concerned, the only valid lines of argument against immigration in this country are that the UK is instigating a drain of workers from other countries that might benefit more from them (and they can't exactly stop that one with regard to Eastern Europe without EU withdrawal) and that the population is growing too quickly (to which there are other solutions, and don't forget that emigration is soaring too - mostly right-wing anti-immigration hypocrites moving to Dubai or Spain to form their own ethnic ghettos, something that makes me unbelievably angry).

Well let's see, due to the existence of the EU, they could in fact be fined.

The only question that then remains is: Are the british police willing to bother fining someone who drove 10 miles above the speed limit?

I mean, is the postage going to cost more than the fine? :p

I don't think they actually did it....

emigration is soaring too - mostly right-wing anti-immigration hypocrites moving to Dubai or Spain to form their own ethnic ghettos, something that makes me unbelievably angry).

The BBC had some interesting statistics a while ago on British emigration. And I seem to remember that one in 17 British nationals is now living abroad.

Another tidbit on that: I quite recently read a book about Australian history, in which the author (James Jupp, if I recall correctly) mentioned that the only two immigrant groups which have a tendency to "ghettoise" in Australia today are the Vietnamese... and the British. (Not to say that they all do so, of course; far from it.)

i'm pretty sure this isn't the first time the Mail has made shit up to pursue its sensationalist right-wing agenda

no big surprise here

It's right-wing media, so I'm torn between my reaction being "well, duh", "quelle surprise" or a very sarcastic "Oh REALLY"?

It's right-wing media, so I'm torn between my reaction being "well, duh", "quelle surprise" or a very sarcastic "Oh REALLY"?

http://www.ocf.berkeley.edu/~jskong/orly.gif

http://www.ocf.berkeley.edu/~jskong/orly.gif

Genius.

don't forget that emigration is soaring too - mostly right-wing anti-immigration hypocrites moving to Dubai or Spain to form their own ethnic ghettos, something that makes me unbelievably angry).

That's not the same though. As British culture is superior to other nations they actually benefit from British people going there. Its true, I read it in the Mail *nods*

That's not the same though. As British culture is superior to other nations they actually benefit from British people going there. Its true, I read it in the Mail *nods*

lol

Clicky clicky: http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Daily_Mail

lol

Clicky clicky: http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Daily_Mail

I think this is the first time I've actually found Uncyclopedia amusing.


The Daily Wail, also known as The Daily Heil is a hugely popular British comic for those who believe themselves (usually mistakenly) to be members of the middle classes. A pair of rose-tinted spectacles must be worn to read articles in the Daily Mail, which describe how everything was great in the 1950s before the Islamic Conquest and the introduction of drugs, fat women, paedophiles, the homeless and the invention of sex made daily life intolerable for the conservative middle-class and retired army colonels that inhabit these sceptred isles.

[...] During the 1930s the Daily Mail briefly supported the Blackshirts and Nazis before they realised the former were too moderate and liberal while the latter were German and therefore European[1]. Nowadays the paper campaigns against abortion of heterosexual foetuses [2], while also maintaining the entirely logical and consistent position of demanding the withdrawal of welfare payments to fallen women to support their unwanted bastards.

[...] Common Headlines
PAEDOPHILE ASYLUM-SEEKERS SWAMP BRITAIN
SIKHS IN SURREY: IS NOWHERE SAFE?
FURY AS MUSLIM MOVES NEXT DOOR
LESBIAN ASYLUM-SEEKERS TORMENT MIDDLE-ENGLAND
HOW BROWN FLEECES MIDDLE-CLASS TO FUND GAY ADOPTION
THE IRISH:WHY THE FAMINE WAS A GOOD IDEA
WILL WHITE BRITONS GO THE WAY OF THE RED SQUIRREL?


http://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/6/6b/Mailcrud.JPG

I think this is the first time I've actually found Uncyclopedia amusing.



http://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/6/6b/Mailcrud.JPG

It is rather accurate.

[...] Common Headlines
PAEDOPHILE ASYLUM-SEEKERS SWAMP BRITAIN
SIKHS IN SURREY: IS NOWHERE SAFE?
FURY AS MUSLIM MOVES NEXT DOOR
LESBIAN ASYLUM-SEEKERS TORMENT MIDDLE-ENGLAND
HOW BROWN FLEECES MIDDLE-CLASS TO FUND GAY ADOPTION
THE IRISH:WHY THE FAMINE WAS A GOOD IDEA
WILL WHITE BRITONS GO THE WAY OF THE RED SQUIRREL?

lmao :p brilliant

Mock the Week did a great bit on the Mail years back. if i wasn't at work i'd try to find it on youtube...

I think this is the first time I've actually found Uncyclopedia amusing.



http://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/6/6b/Mailcrud.JPG

I read the headlines and I thought 'hmm, someone should really write a program to put words together and generate those randomly."

I was foolish to believe it hadn't been done. I love the interwebs.

http://www.qwghlm.co.uk/toys/dailymail/

DO PAEDOPHILES INFECT THE COUNTRYSIDE WITH AIDS?
COULD BRUSSELS BUREAUCRATS GIVE YOUR MORTGAGE CANCER?

Hurrah for cheap laughs.

Well, to get back on topic, I echo the shock and horror of others that such a pillar of British journalism should ever stoop this low.

DOES CHANNEL 4 TAX YOUR DAUGHTERS?
WILL IMMIGRANTS CHEAT YOUR DAUGHTERS?
WILL TEENAGE SEX RIP OFF THE CONSERVATIVES?

The Daily Mail has a thing for teenage girls, it seems.

WILL PAEDOPHILES IMPREGNATE YOUR HOUSE?

Only if its a new house...

WILL PAEDOPHILES IMPREGNATE YOUR HOUSE?

Only if its a new house...

Ba dum tish

A bias newspaper... and how is this news? Name me a truly impartial newspaper that specialises in true journalism and not this pseudo-journalistic crap that's being passed off as objective.

A bias newspaper... and how is this news? Name me a truly impartial newspaper that specialises in true journalism and not this pseudo-journalistic crap that's being passed off as objective.

Not just biased. Outright lying. Sure, every other newspaper will bias themselves to pander to the opinions of their readers, but actually(allegedly) paying someone to break the law so you can sell your paper is pushing it.

Ick.. The Daily Heil. I always feel dirty after touching it.

I'm with the majority who are unsurprised about this.

A bias newspaper... and how is this news? Name me a truly impartial newspaper that specialises in true journalism and not this pseudo-journalistic crap that's being passed off as objective.

I think the difference here is between broadsheets, which tend to have an editorial bias but are usually above printing outright lies and sensationalism, and tabloids which will do just that.

WILL PAEDOPHILES IMPREGNATE YOUR HOUSE?

Only if its a new house...

I laughed, I'm ashamed to say.

DO SINGLE MOTHERS IMPREGNATE THE ELDERLY?

:eek:

COULD THE LEFT INFECT YOUR HOUSE WITH AIDS?
COULD THE BBC IMPREGNATE CAR DRIVERS?
WILL GYPSIES GIVE BRITAIN'S SWANS CANCER?
DOES FEMINISM DESTROY BRITISH SOVEREIGNTY?
DOES ALASTAIR CAMPBELL LEAD THE QUEEN ASTRAY?
COULD GREENPEACE INFECT BRITAIN'S SWANS WITH AIDS?
WILL THE FRENCH STRIP YOUR DAUGHTERS OF ALL DIGNITY?

Heard about this a few days ago. Absolutely and completely unsurprised, and as long as their political opponents do not sink to similar levels they will hold an undisputable and immense moral high ground.

We must now assume that every anti-immigration stunt in the tabloid media is based on a pack of self-serving lies. As far as I'm concerned, the only valid lines of argument against immigration in this country are that the UK is instigating a drain of workers from other countries that might benefit more from them (and they can't exactly stop that one with regard to Eastern Europe without EU withdrawal) and that the population is growing too quickly (to which there are other solutions, and don't forget that emigration is soaring too - mostly right-wing anti-immigration hypocrites moving to Dubai or Spain to form their own ethnic ghettos, something that makes me unbelievably angry).
My partner and have bought a property in Southern Spain and will be moving in 2 years time. The difference being that WE ARE TAKING WEALTH INTO our host country, not drawing benefits from it. We have both taken the trouble to learn the language of our hosts and we do NOT expect them to change their culture to fit in with us. :cool:

The difference being that WE ARE TAKING WEALTH INTO our host country, not drawing benefits from it. We have both taken the trouble to learn the language of our hosts and we do NOT expect them to change their culture to fit in with us.

The difference with... what? whom?

Heard about this a few days ago. Absolutely and completely unsurprised, and as long as their political opponents do not sink to similar levels they will hold an undisputable and immense moral high ground.

We must now assume that every anti-immigration stunt in the tabloid media is based on a pack of self-serving lies. As far as I'm concerned, the only valid lines of argument against immigration in this country are that the UK is instigating a drain of workers from other countries that might benefit more from them (and they can't exactly stop that one with regard to Eastern Europe without EU withdrawal) and that the population is growing too quickly (to which there are other solutions, and don't forget that emigration is soaring too - mostly right-wing anti-immigration hypocrites moving to Dubai or Spain to form their own ethnic ghettos, something that makes me unbelievably angry).

EU withdrawal suits me. When can we start?

As for "white flight", it really is not that great a surprise. Much as New Labour might bleat moralistically and brandish crude statistics like a caveman would a torch against the darkness, the simple fact is that in a qualitative context, one upon which statistics are of less use than words, Britain has devolved into an awful place to live, and to bring up a family. The state education system is rabidly anti-intellectual and conformist; the exceptions, Grammar schools, are now seen as bastions as elitism. Public services are now committed to ever increasing spending with diminishing returns, whilst wave upon wave of immigration has eroded what indiginous community spirit still exists. Frankly, I hope everybody who voted New Labour enjoys their spiralling crime rate, pensions crisis and fractured society; I intend to watch from abroad and laugh.:)

I intend to watch from abroad and laugh.:)

You're emigrating? Where to?

You're emigrating? Where to?

At the moment, being only 18, I haven't a clue. The Isle of Man has a certain Clarksony charm, and Gibraltar, The East Coast of the USA and New Zealand are high on my list. Italy would be alright actually.

At the moment, being only 18, I haven't a clue. The Isle of Man has a certain Clarksony charm, and Gibraltar, The East Coast of the USA and New Zealand are high on my list. Italy would be alright actually.

The only ones I've been to are Italy and New Zealand. Italy is lovely, but frightfully hot in summer. New Zealand is OK.

Why New Zealand?

I hope everybody who voted New Labour enjoys their spiralling crime rate

Do please inform me of when this spiralling crime rate begins, I can't say I've noticed it yet.

Do please inform me of when this spiralling crime rate begins, I can't say I've noticed it yet.

Hush.. The doctors say it's dangerous to disturb them when they get like this..

I intend to watch from abroad and laugh.:)

Gah!
:eek: IMMIGRANT!!! Unclean! UNCLEAN!!!

*Flees*

At the moment, being only 18, I haven't a clue. The Isle of Man has a certain Clarksony charm, and Gibraltar, The East Coast of the USA and New Zealand are high on my list. Italy would be alright actually.

Here's hoping you're treated like you wish immigrants were treated there.

Here's hoping you're treated like you wish immigrants were treated there.

I have no objection to professionaly, qualified and cultured migrants. Just mass immigration.

Do please inform me of when this spiralling crime rate begins, I can't say I've noticed it yet.

Knife crime? Juvenile delinquency?

I have no objection to professionaly, qualified and cultured migrants. Just mass immigration.

"I don't want to gas ALL Jews, just some."

"I don't want to gas ALL Jews, just some."

Disagreeing with mass immigration = wanting to kill immigrants?

Disagreeing with mass immigration = wanting to kill immigrants?

No, I was actually pointing out the idiocy in choosing certain human beings over others.

No, I was actually pointing out the idiocy in choosing certain human beings over others.

I was chosen to enter university over others based on certain grades I achieved. Idiocy?

No, I was actually pointing out the idiocy in choosing certain human beings over others.

Thats not idiocy, its actually quite smart to do so. Immigrants who bring with them ability are clearly more favorable than those without ability.

No, I was actually pointing out the idiocy in choosing certain human beings over others.

That might well be the most ludicrous statement I've read.

There is every good reason to choose certain human beings over others; in regards to immigration, I tend to choose those whom are likely to benefit my country without simply settling upon it like a turd.

I have no objection to professionaly, qualified and cultured migrants. Just mass immigration.

Savour the delicious irony...

Chris, considering the fact that you are neither professionally qualified nor particularly cultured, your best bet would be a country that specifcally allows for mass immigration.

Please do not choose Canada. You wouldn't like it. We think multiculturalism is a good idea over here.

Knife crime? Juvenile delinquency?

Is that why the number of violent crimes between April and June 2007 there were 20 odd thousand violent crimes recorded by the police less than compared to the same period last year? Apparently crime has fallen by 7% since last year. Would this spiral be a downward one?

Savour the delicious irony...

Chris, considering the fact that you are neither professionally qualified nor particularly cultured, your best bet would be a country that specifcally allows for mass immigration.

Please do not choose Canada. You wouldn't like it. We think multiculturalism is a good idea over here.

I'm probably better qualified than you were at my age, and I'm easily better than cultured than yourself. That I'm a bastard really is of no consequence.:)

Trilby63;13193566']Is that why the number of violent crimes between April and June 2007 there were 20 odd thousand violent crimes recorded by the police less than compared to the same period last year? Apparently crime has fallen by 7% since last year. Would this spiral be a downward one?

No, I think this is all a misunderstanding. When he said we should enjoy the sprialling crime, I thought he was being sarcastic. Maybe he was actually wishing us well, as we enjoy the downward spiralling crime rate that has existed since 1995.

Trilby63;13193566']Is that why the number of violent crimes between April and June 2007 there were 20 odd thousand violent crimes recorded by the police less than compared to the same period last year? Apparently crime has fallen by 7% since last year. Would this spiral be a downward one?

I know full well why crime has fallen; the government are actually doing something about it now, considering what a god awful state suburbia is in. Strage how actually policing works eh?

I'm probably better qualified than you were at my age, and I'm easily better than cultured than yourself. That I'm a bastard really is of no consequence.:)

Really? By all means then, list your qualifications and inform me what you know about culture.

No, I think this is all a misunderstanding. When he said we should enjoy the sprialling crime, I thought he was being sarcastic. Maybe he was actually wishing us well, as we enjoy the downward spiralling crime rate that has existed since 1995.

Dream on. Nothing New Labour has done is anything more than statistical gymnatsics; ask an average member of the public whether they feel safer, or more threatened, now than in 1996, and the answer would favour John Major I feel.

I know full well why crime has fallen; the government are actually doing something about it now, considering what a god awful state suburbia is in. Strage how actually policing works eh?

It peaked at 1995. Remind me. Was that under a Tory government by any chance?

Really? By all means then, list your qualifications and inform me what you know about culture.

Would qualification comparisons not be a little difficult when you both come from different education systems (as far as i know)?

Not to mention nothing can be verified

Dream on. Nothing New Labour has done is anything more than statistical gymnatsics; ask an average member of the public whether they feel safer, or more threatened, now than in 1996, and the answer would favour John Major I feel.

I know full well why crime has fallen; the government are actually doing something about it now, considering what a god awful state suburbia is in. Strage how actually policing works eh?

Yeah, I'm having a little trouble reconcilling these two statements. Which one is it? A New Labour conspiracy or policing in action?

Would qualification comparisons not be a little difficult when you both come from different education systems (as far as i know)?

Not to mention nothing can be verified

At 18, I was fluent in a second language (English), skilled in a third (Spanish), had read many of the so-called classics, and on it goes.

I'm probably better qualified than you were at my age, and I'm easily better than cultured than yourself. That I'm a bastard really is of no consequence.:)

That's nice that you believe that.

There is still the fact that you probably do not qualify for any 'skilled worker' visa since you probably have little more than a secondary school education. Perhaps you could get a job as an overseas correspondent for the Daily Mail. I think you have the necessary education, and you seem to have the right attitude. Your English could use a little work.

Perhaps you could get a job as an overseas correspondent for the Daily Mail. I think you have the necessary education, and you seem to have the right attitude.
Thanks a lot, that burn just set my fire alarm off. *Grumble*

That's nice that you believe that.

There is still the fact that you probably do not qualify for any 'skilled worker' visa since you probably have little more than a secondary school education. Perhaps you could get a job as an overseas correspondent for the Daily Mail. I think you have the necessary education, and you seem to have the right attitude. Your English could use a little work.

You know, it's really infuriating when I try and I try to win a thread and someone like you just up and wins it. :p

I'm truly not surprised that the Daily Heil has been caught manufacturing stories. I'm sure I heard something similar of them a while ago, concerning a story that involved the evil immigrants killing and eaten one of the Queen's animals, namely a swan.

I find the paper quite funny and would regularly read it because of its fear-mongering and sensationalism. Plus, they would often feature a double-page spread on some bizarre theory. One of the choice ones was about how there were actually many technologically advanced civilisations in the past, the proof of this being spark plugs found under a sand dune, or something else easily explainable

No surprise about the fabricating. They once published a story about a two-year old who was supposedly addicted to the N64 game Goldeneye 007, which meant that he must have been very advanced at reading, considering you have to complete objectives to finish the game (which you could see had happened as the magnum cheat was unlocked). And also telekinetic, since he wasn't actually touching most of the necessary buttons in the picture (and his hands were too small anyway). Oh, and they claimed his parents were buying him a "portable version", no such thing existing.