NationStates Jolt Archive

Last night my roomie and I had a terrible row. I'd been a little cranky lately, having been sick. Yesterday it seemed everytime he opened his mouth it irritated me.

Last night he decided to get back at me by standing outside my bedroom door thumping on the wall and stomping aroung as I was trying to sleep. At first I ignored him, figuring he'd get tired of such childishness and quit after a bit. Thirty minutes later dumbass is still doing it.

So I finally decided to have it out with him. When I entered the livingroom and started bitching at him he started throwing stuff. Mind you, nothing big. Pencils and model parts. Merely irritating. But at this point I lost it. Knowing full well he's totally paranoid about cops I said "Well, technically that's assault, so I'm calling the cops."

He told me that if I called the cops he'd kill my cat. I picked up the phone anyway. He shoved past me into the bedroom and grabbed my cat by the neck. Not really his best move.

I launched myself straight at his face. He's a lot bigger than I, well over six foot and three-hundred pounds. So I went for his eyes. With my claws. Yes, I fought like a girl. But since he's more than double my size, it seemed to be my best bet. Besides, I was pissed.

So now his face looks like raw hamburger. I have a cracked rib and extremely sore shoulder. Not to mention he tried to strangle me. I finally decided not to call the cops. I figured they'd just arrest us both.

He cried and told me he could never have actually hurt the cat, he just wanted me to think he would. Not his best idea. And after I thought it over, I figured he was probably telling the truth. He bawled like a big baby when the neighbor's dog killed one of the cats.

But back to the original question. Am I evil? Just stupid? How much blame for this fiasco is mine? Should I forgive? Should he?

Am I evil? Just stupid? How much blame for this fiasco is mine? Should I forgive? Should he?

I'd say it's probably not the best idea to be living with someone who threatened to kill your cat, strangled you and cracked your rib

sounds like he was being a complete dickhead, i'd have done the same. well i'd probably have punched and kicked him rather than scratched. threatening someone's pet is seriously not cool and he was being a childish idiot before then anyway. would definitely have flipped my lid after all that.

Er, prolly both of you share blame, who should get the larger share of the blame doesn't matter... heck, blame wouldn't do anything anyway. So both of you should just make up and bury the hatchet, it'd probably be better if both of you sit down and talk, explain honestly, and talk about making things better and repairing your relationship. 'Course, your roommates are one of those people who are in a better position to help you in times of need...

And while he can break your rib, he has a soft spot, y'know. A big big guy who cried at you? And he's afraid of cops... I'm rather inclined to believe both of you just got carried away...

I’ve entertained some suspicions that this forum has more than it's fair share of entirely dysfunctional people...

My suspicions have been confirmed. ;)

I’ve entertained some suspicions that this forum has more than it's fair share of entirely dysfunctional people...

My suspicions have been confirmed. ;)You just suspected? A bit slow, friend.

You are actually in love with him. Thats why you clawed his face, it's a sign of love.

Er, prolly both of you share blame, who should get the larger share of the blame doesn't matter... heck, blame wouldn't do anything anyway. So both of you should just make up and bury the hatchet, it'd probably be better if both of you sit down and talk, explain honestly, and talk about making things better and repairing your relationship. 'Course, your roommates are one of those people who are in a better position to help you in times of need...

And while he can break your rib, he has a soft spot, y'know. A big big guy who cried at you? And he's afraid of cops... I'm rather inclined to believe both you just got carried away...
I'm inclined to go this way. Yeah, he was pretty uncool. But he's just lost his job and I've been a bit of a bitch to live with. I did insist he get counseling, since he has a bit of an anger management problem. And told him in no uncertain terms to keep his hands off the cat.

You are actually in love with him. Thats why you clawed his face, it's a sign of love.Actually, I love you better. Where do you live?

Last night my roomie and I had a terrible row. I'd been a little cranky lately, having been sick. Yesterday it seemed everytime he opened his mouth it irritated me.

Last night he decided to get back at me by standing outside my bedroom door thumping on the wall and stomping aroung as I was trying to sleep. At first I ignored him, figuring he'd get tired of such childishness and quit after a bit. Thirty minutes later dumbass is still doing it.

So I finally decided to have it out with him. When I entered the livingroom and started bitching at him he started throwing stuff. Mind you, nothing big. Pencils and model parts. Merely irritating. But at this point I lost it. Knowing full well he's totally paranoid about cops I said "Well, technically that's assault, so I'm calling the cops."

He told me that if I called the cops he'd kill my cat. I picked up the phone anyway. He shoved past me into the bedroom and grabbed my cat by the neck. Not really his best move.

I launched myself straight at his face. He's a lot bigger than I, well over six foot and three-hundred pounds. So I went for his eyes. With my claws. Yes, I fought like a girl. But since he's more than double my size, it seemed to be my best bet. Besides, I was pissed.

So now his face looks like raw hamburger. I have a cracked rib and extremely sore shoulder. Not to mention he tried to strangle me. I finally decided not to call the cops. I figured they'd just arrest us both.

He cried and told me he could never have actually hurt the cat, he just wanted me to think he would. Not his best idea. And after I thought it over, I figured he was probably telling the truth. He bawled like a big baby when the neighbor's dog killed one of the cats.

But back to the original question. Am I evil? Just stupid? How much blame for this fiasco is mine? Should I forgive? Should he?

Sounds like good fun. No-harm done. forgive, and forget. Fights are nice.

Your just insane

Your just insaneI realize that. But how did you come to that conclusion?

Unless this happens all the time, you're not an evil person; you just lost control. You're human. It happens. No worries.

It sounds like he provoked it. And if he grabbed the thing by the neck, that is a real danger to it. I'd say you acted like a normal human.

Fuck him and make up.

Errr... if he were your boyfriend, we would all be advising you to get the hell out before he kills you.

The advice is still good. If you two are the type of people who get violent when angry, you need to NOT BE LIVING TOGETHER before something worse happens.

Domestic abuse does not only mean "abuse between people who are supposedly in love with each other", it can also mean between people who merely share a domicile.

Forgive him, sure but you both need to be seeing a counsellor. And you both need to not be living under the same roof. Violence is never acceptable.

And you honestly didn't think about putting the knee into his gonads?

Shame on you!

I realize that. But how did you come to that conclusion?

read your original post again

I'm inclined to go this way. Yeah, he was pretty uncool. But he's just lost his job and I've been a bit of a bitch to live with. I did insist he get counseling, since he has a bit of an anger management problem. And told him in no uncertain terms to keep his hands off the cat.
See, you both have issues... I defer to Upper Botswavia's post. But you both need to patch up things right now. ;)

and you're roommate is stupid. just accept it.

Move out and move on.

Meh.

The mental health quotient in our household is pretty low. I'm bipolar and I'm not sure about the roomies, but they both have some problems. But threatening the crazy-cat-lady's cat is not wise.

Last night my roomie and I had a terrible row. I'd been a little cranky lately, having been sick. Yesterday it seemed everytime he opened his mouth it irritated me.

Last night he decided to get back at me by standing outside my bedroom door thumping on the wall and stomping aroung as I was trying to sleep. At first I ignored him, figuring he'd get tired of such childishness and quit after a bit. Thirty minutes later dumbass is still doing it.

So I finally decided to have it out with him. When I entered the livingroom and started bitching at him he started throwing stuff. Mind you, nothing big. Pencils and model parts. Merely irritating. But at this point I lost it. Knowing full well he's totally paranoid about cops I said "Well, technically that's assault, so I'm calling the cops."

He told me that if I called the cops he'd kill my cat. I picked up the phone anyway. He shoved past me into the bedroom and grabbed my cat by the neck. Not really his best move.

I launched myself straight at his face. He's a lot bigger than I, well over six foot and three-hundred pounds. So I went for his eyes. With my claws. Yes, I fought like a girl. But since he's more than double my size, it seemed to be my best bet. Besides, I was pissed.

So now his face looks like raw hamburger. I have a cracked rib and extremely sore shoulder. Not to mention he tried to strangle me. I finally decided not to call the cops. I figured they'd just arrest us both.

He cried and told me he could never have actually hurt the cat, he just wanted me to think he would. Not his best idea. And after I thought it over, I figured he was probably telling the truth. He bawled like a big baby when the neighbor's dog killed one of the cats.

But back to the original question. Am I evil? Just stupid? How much blame for this fiasco is mine? Should I forgive? Should he?


He's a moron. Try, if you can, to find another roommate.

You didn't exactly cover yourself with glory, but he's just wacko and you need to lose him.

But back to the original question. Am I evil? Just stupid? How much blame for this fiasco is mine? Should I forgive? Should he?

I don't what you are but your story made me laugh, I wish I was there. I wonder if that makes me evil, finding assault funny.

Video taped proof, or it didn't happen.

Last night my roomie and I had a terrible row. I'd been a little cranky lately, having been sick. Yesterday it seemed everytime he opened his mouth it irritated me.

Last night he decided to get back at me by standing outside my bedroom door thumping on the wall and stomping aroung as I was trying to sleep...Tell him to give you a good long lick and then.. do him.
Its going to calm you down.. both of you.

Sex is what the Doctor ordered.. Sex is the miracle drug.

I don't what you are but your story made me laugh, I wish I was there. I wonder if that makes me evil, finding assault funny.
But we all already know you are evil.

You are actually in love with him. Thats why you clawed his face, it's a sign of love.

If you're a Klingon.

The answer, BK, is in Khadgar's signature:

"Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity." Hanlon's Razor.

Women are crazy; men are stupid. Why are women crazy? Because men are stupid.

Women are crazy; men are stupid. Why are women crazy? Because men are stupid.every now and then Girls need a certain amount of :fluffle:.. affection.

It would be stupid not to give them.

Fuck, that reads like a white trash parody.

Women are crazy; men are stupid. Why are women crazy? Because men are stupid.George Carlin?

Last night my roomie and I had a terrible row. I'd been a little cranky lately, having been sick. Yesterday it seemed everytime he opened his mouth it irritated me.

Last night he decided to get back at me by standing outside my bedroom door thumping on the wall and stomping aroung as I was trying to sleep. At first I ignored him, figuring he'd get tired of such childishness and quit after a bit. Thirty minutes later dumbass is still doing it.

So I finally decided to have it out with him. When I entered the livingroom and started bitching at him he started throwing stuff. Mind you, nothing big. Pencils and model parts. Merely irritating. But at this point I lost it. Knowing full well he's totally paranoid about cops I said "Well, technically that's assault, so I'm calling the cops."

He told me that if I called the cops he'd kill my cat. I picked up the phone anyway. He shoved past me into the bedroom and grabbed my cat by the neck. Not really his best move.

I launched myself straight at his face. He's a lot bigger than I, well over six foot and three-hundred pounds. So I went for his eyes. With my claws. Yes, I fought like a girl. But since he's more than double my size, it seemed to be my best bet. Besides, I was pissed.

So now his face looks like raw hamburger. I have a cracked rib and extremely sore shoulder. Not to mention he tried to strangle me. I finally decided not to call the cops. I figured they'd just arrest us both.

He cried and told me he could never have actually hurt the cat, he just wanted me to think he would. Not his best idea. And after I thought it over, I figured he was probably telling the truth. He bawled like a big baby when the neighbor's dog killed one of the cats.

But back to the original question. Am I evil? Just stupid? How much blame for this fiasco is mine? Should I forgive? Should he?

Evil? Nah. Stupid? Probably, after all he is bigger than you. Justified? I'd say so. I would've probably liked to witness the fight, hell probably would've jumped in too.

Don't beat yourself up any more than you have. Your cat's fine, you're fine (for the most part) and he's fine as well. Move on already.

The trick to being evil is to do enough of it that you dont have to pause to ask yourself these silly questions. It just slows you down. I suggest escalation of the incident immediatly.

Fuck, that reads like a white trash parody.

I sometimes forget that things that are typical in Oklahoma are.....not typical elsewhere.

Also, Bitchkitten.... drama much? Surely you and your roomies can figure out more passive aggressive ways to piss each other off.

I haven't had a domestic incident in my house in like 8 years.....although we did buy that refrigerator poetry set a while back, sarcastic haiku goes a long ways to prevent violence.

I don't know about evil, but you two probably shouldn't be living together. Or, at least, are in need of some vacation time from each other.
Me and my brother are the same way in that if we spend more than a couple weeks in the same building it always comes to blows, which really sucks since he's such a pussy that as soon as someone draws blood he gets all whiny.

But back to the original question. Am I evil?
No.
Just stupid?
In this case, yes.
How much blame for this fiasco is mine?
I don't know. You say that your roommate was getting back at you, so if you really wanted blame to be alloted we'd have to know more about the situation before he started stomping.
But it's probably about 50-50. Even if it's not 50-50, pretend it is so that neither of you feels superior.

Should I forgive? Should he?
Yes, because forgiveness is so nice. :)

However, someone earlier brought up a good point: you might want to reconsider living with someone who broke your rib.

You're not evil, or even abnormal. You got in a fight, almost everyone gets in a fight at least once in their lives. But you seriously need some better conflict resolution skills, and your roommate needs those skills even more than you do. Most people learn how to avoid fights before they're old enough move out of their parents house.

If I where you I'd seriously consider calling the cops. If you're really so much smaller than he is it shouldn't be hard to convince them it was self defense. But if you really think you can get along with this guy from now on, go ahead and forgive him. At least you'll have something to talk about 2 years from now.

He deserved it, if anyone threatened to kill one of my cats i would do the same.

Wow, I would totally be on NSG with a cracked rib.

Well it sounds like you really pissed him off to make him try to keep you awake. Don't do that.

You're both at fault obviously.

How old is this guy anyway?

Sounds like he's a teenager.

Errr... if he were your boyfriend, we would all be advising you to get the hell out before he kills you.

The advice is still good. If you two are the type of people who get violent when angry, you need to NOT BE LIVING TOGETHER before something worse happens.

Domestic abuse does not only mean "abuse between people who are supposedly in love with each other", it can also mean between people who merely share a domicile.

Forgive him, sure but you both need to be seeing a counsellor. And you both need to not be living under the same roof. Violence is never acceptable.


What he said.

Seriously, IIRC you described yourself as bipolar and I quite clearly remember other posts of yours that tell us about your obvious deficiency when it comes to anger management, and you should absolutely not be living with someone who cannot deal with that in a safe manner.

Make peace ASAP, then see counseling (both of you, together). You don't want this to happen again, do you?

There are people here who are actually saying that because he CRIED after threatening to kill your cat,actually grabbing it by the neck, breaking your rib, hurting your shoulder, and throwing things at you, you should just make up?

I'd be moving the fuck out before he KILLS you.

Send this to him :)

http://hometown.aol.com/jacky72000/images/you%20make%20kitty%20scared.jpg
As for evil no
Things could have been better but the breaking point was him threatening your pet ... he went over then.

so thats your side of the story, whats the real story?

from what you said it made it seem like he was making noise just for the hell of it. what time was it and what else was going on?

Hmm, I suggest you get away from him.

But back to the original question. Am I evil? Just stupid? How much blame for this fiasco is mine? Should I forgive? Should he?

I wouldn't say you're evil, we all have our breaking points. As for stupid, I can't say. Some blame does fall on you for attacking him first, but he also should have handled things better. If both of you are willing to look past this, then you should both forgive each other.
However, if you were irritated with him, you should have told him why and he should have been more mature with how he dealt with it.

There are people here who are actually saying that because he CRIED after threatening to kill your cat,actually grabbing it by the neck, breaking your rib, hurting your shoulder, and throwing things at you, you should just make up?

I'd be moving the fuck out before he KILLS you.For people that grew up with annoying siblings, this stuff is normal. Or maybe my sibling is extra annoying.

However, if you were irritated with him, you should have told him why and he should have been more mature with how he dealt with it.I get the impression that the kitten person probably tormented the other guy all day for being "irritating," and finally drove him over the edge.

Last night my roomie and I had a terrible row. I'd been a little cranky lately, having been sick. Yesterday it seemed everytime he opened his mouth it irritated me.

Okay, we all get cranky once in a while...

Last night he decided to get back at me by standing outside my bedroom door thumping on the wall and stomping around as I was trying to sleep. At first I ignored him, figuring he'd get tired of such childishness and quit after a bit. Thirty minutes later dumbass is still doing it.

Woah, that's a big leap - what exactly was he getting back at you for - if just for crankiness then he's acting like a 6-year old child, perhaps you were more than just cranky - this points to a situation where logic and mutual conversation are disappearing as options, which leads to regression in terms of being able to deal with the conflict. Still, no big deal at this point.

So I finally decided to have it out with him. When I entered the living room and started bitching at him he started throwing stuff. Mind you, nothing big. Pencils and model parts. Merely irritating. But at this point I lost it. Knowing full well he's totally paranoid about cops I said "Well, technically that's assault, so I'm calling the cops."

Again, we talk of escalation and this has gone from cranky - stomping - call the cops. There's surely history of riling each other up and being verbally abusive at least, especially since you're needling him on a particular area - calling assault on pencils being thrown also shines a light on where you expect this all to go, where your mind is.

He told me that if I called the cops he'd kill my cat. I picked up the phone anyway.

Now at this point, well, to be fair, arguments can get to this point among many people, whether close friends, siblings or couples, tempers flare and we do stupid things - mostly, we realise we're being idiots since, at this point, there's a stand-off because most reasonable people are unwilling to escalate it to the next level - we're all sorry and etc., or we stomp off to separate areas and sulk for a while.

He shoved past me into the bedroom and grabbed my cat by the neck. Not really his best move.

Hello? Seriously, you've leapt to the point where he's shoving and grabbing cats - both of you are angling for a fight.

I launched myself straight at his face. He's a lot bigger than I, well over six foot and three-hundred pounds. So I went for his eyes. With my claws. Yes, I fought like a girl. But since he's more than double my size, it seemed to be my best bet. Besides, I was pissed.

Yet given your story, this is unlikely to be the first time...

...and bam, you get what you wanted.

So now his face looks like raw hamburger. I have a cracked rib and extremely sore shoulder. Not to mention he tried to strangle me. I finally decided not to call the cops. I figured they'd just arrest us both.

Cracked rib? That's fairly serious violence.

He cried and told me he could never have actually hurt the cat, he just wanted me to think he would. Not his best idea. And after I thought it over, I figured he was probably telling the truth. He bawled like a big baby when the neighbor's dog killed one of the cats.

See, you're going through a classic confrontation-redemption scene here - this is halfway house to domestic violence, whether you're in a physical relationship or not, and, in fact, you're already going through the motions. To some extent, all this would be fine if not for this redemption scene, the crying and asking for forgiveness - it's this that is most troubling.

I'd say there's serious unresolved tension between you both, where you both rely on each other for emotional interaction yet are unable to follow through on that interaction, leading to requiring an outlet, which is verbal and physical abuse towards each other.

But back to the original question. Am I evil? Just stupid? How much blame for this fiasco is mine? Should I forgive? Should he?

No, you're not evil - you have serious issues between the two of you that are unlikely, to be honest, to be resolved unless there's serious time spent apart, and I mean minimum one year if not more.

Get out.

Evil? No

Strange? Probably

Raising cougar kittens with children as live meals? Almost certainly :D