NationStates Jolt Archive

My story: this morning I heard some knocking on the door. I felt lazy and waited for the visitor to leave. I thank Jehovah I didn't answer it. He saw to my safety.

Later that day I opened the door and went-out. I found a Jehovah's Witness pamphlet attached to the doorknob.

So, what do you have to be thankful for?

This delicious fruit soda.

That I have enough free time to read these things

My story: this morning I heard some knocking on the door. I felt lazy and waited for the visitor to leave. I thank Jehovah I didn't answer it. He saw to my safety.

Later that day I opened the door and went-out. I found a Jehovah's Witness pamphlet attached to the doorknob.

So, what do you have to be thankful for?

*slaps your forehead*

You idiot, you missed an opportunity to mess with a Jehovah's Witness.

As for me, I thank Jehovah for my girlfriend. She is just awesome. :)

everything. absolutely everything.

I'm thankful that pamphlets are easy to dispose of, unlike real live Jehovah's Witnesses.

I'm thankful that pamphlets are easy to dispose of, unlike real live Jehovah's Witnesses.
We use them as scratch paper, or use them to make paper planes, or paper cranes.

Thank Jehova you're not dumb enough to be in this bloody cult to begin with, and you dont believe that doorknocking, harrassing and trying to convince thousands of people while doing nothing remotely fun is the only way to go to Heaven. I mean personally im religious and i have respect for all religions... except Jehova's Witness and Scientology.

I am thankful I met my new neighbor down the road, she seems really nice. :)

Although I'm non-religious, to keep with the OP I'm thankful that I've found some really cool pitch and harmonic relationships in this Wolf lied, but I now need to convert it into an essay.

For everything created for us..wich we boud to destroy and not care!
What u think of that?

So, what do you have to be thankful for?

I thank Jehovah for chariots made of iron.
*Judges 1:19*

I'm thankful that pamphlets are easy to dispose of, unlike real live Jehovah's Witnesses.

...and their inverted nipples.

I thank Jehovah for chariots made of iron.
*Judges 1:19*

Oh, Jehova likes old Cadillacs too? Can't say I disagree there. :p

I thank Jehovah for chariots made of iron.
*Judges 1:19*

What is your deal with always quoting the old testament? :p

What is your deal with always quoting the old testament? :p

Just the juicy parts, you know, like Malachi 2:3 ! :p
I mean juicy.
http://www.websmileys.com/sm/crazy/156.gif

Oh, Jehova likes old Cadillacs too? Can't say I disagree there. :p

Ye-ah ... pimp-mobile, boiiiii.
http://sensiblyeclectic.com/b2evolution/blogs/media/bush_pimp.jpg

Just the juicy parts, you know, like Malachi 2:3 ! :p
I mean juicy.
http://www.websmileys.com/sm/crazy/156.gif

:p

My story: this morning I heard some knocking on the door. I felt lazy and waited for the visitor to leave. I thank Jehovah I didn't answer it. He saw to my safety.

Later that day I opened the door and went-out. I found a Jehovah's Witness pamphlet attached to the doorknob.

So, what do you have to be thankful for?

I am thankful that Jehovah is actually fictional and does not exist.

I am thankful that Jehovah is actually fictional and does not exist.

Hallelujah.

I thank Jehovah for vowels.

I thank Jehovah for vowels.

This is strongly remniscient of Subgenius inference. :)

*slaps your forehead*

You idiot, you missed an opportunity to mess with a Jehovah's Witness.

As for me, I thank Jehovah for my girlfriend. She is just awesome. :)

You should invite them in to play WiiSports. *nods*

I thank JHVH for Halibut.

What's a Jehovah ?

What's a Jehovah ?

Why? Je-hov-ah problem with it?

Why? Je-hov-ah problem with it?omg

omg

Come on, admit it, you laughed :)

Why'd I read the thread title as "Things to thank Jenova for."?

I thank thank Jehovah for implicitly agreeing to be chow for my god Cthulhu when "the stars are right".

Don't you want the gift to be eaten first (http://www.geocities.com/neverclan/c/cthulhu.html)?

I'm thankful that when Jehova's Witnesses drive up, the design of my house and position of my driveway and walkway to my front door gives me fifteen to twenty precious seconds to prepare for their arrival. :)

I'm thankful that when Jehova's Witnesses drive up, the design of my house and position of my driveway and walkway to my front door gives me fifteen to twenty precious seconds to prepare for their arrival. :)

I'm sure they're not thanking Jehovah for you :p

I'm thankful that when Jehova's Witnesses drive up, the design of my house and position of my driveway and walkway to my front door gives me fifteen to twenty precious seconds to prepare for their arrival. :)

One day you're going to have to video tape your antics and put it up on YouTube LG.

I'd sooner be thankful for Jenova than Jehovah.

Why? Je-hov-ah problem with it?

I thank Jehovah for bad puns. And NSG, of course.

I'd sooner be thankful for Jenova than Jehovah.

? (http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=200)

What do I thank Jehovah for? Daisy Chains (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daisy_Chain#Human_sexual_relations).

One day you're going to have to video tape your antics and put it up on YouTube LG.

Some day. Maybe when the kids are old enough to help me work on the Mrs. *nod* I'll break out the video library. :)

I thank Jehovah for these oddly stain resistant pants and the great strength and sharpness of Sabatier carbon steel knives. If given the chance, I would follow Osama Bin Laden to the gates of Hell and kill him (as well as any prostitutes I happen to meet on the way their) with your fine products, Sabatier.
Then I'd store his dismembered corpse in a Continental Triple Door Commercial Freezer. Continental Freezers, for when you care enough about keeping a fuck ton of shit cold to spend $5,000.

I don't worship Jehovah. Just look at my flag.

Now, look! No one is to stone anyone until I blow this whistle! Do you understand?! Even, and I want to make this absolutely clear, even if they do say 'Jehovah'.

And there's the concluding part of the scene

Now, look! No one is to stone anyone until I blow this whistle! Do you understand?! Even, and I want to make this absolutely clear, even if they do say 'Jehovah'.

And there's the concluding part of the scene

You have gained a considerable amount of respect from me for that quote.
I hereby thank Jehovah for Monty Python.

You have gained a considerable amount of respect from me for that quote.
I hereby thank Jehovah for Monty Python.

Amen to that ;)