NationStates Jolt Archive


Let's change the subject

Trotskylvania
17-10-2007, 17:32
There's been a lot of really bitter discussion over religion. So, I think that we need to talk about something a little bit warmer and fuzzier. Something that'll really open the cockles of your heart. Something like genocide. Or mass murder, that'd be good to. Or how about war crimes, rape, necrophilia (kick back and crack open a cold one ;) ), human sacrifice, cannibalism or Donald Trump's hair cut. Really despicable things that we can all agree on.
Dexlysia
17-10-2007, 17:36
omg bush is teh evilz0rz nazi111111111112





...

Be careful what you wish for.
Trotskylvania
17-10-2007, 18:01
omg bush is teh evilz0rz nazi111111111112
...
Be careful what you wish for.

z0MG! teh ebil kommiez w4nt ur children!!!11!!

At least some hysteria over another subject would be a nice change of pace
Zaheran
17-10-2007, 18:04
Go genocide! *waves with flag* :)
Linus and Lucy
17-10-2007, 18:30
There's been a lot of really bitter discussion over religion. So, I think that we need to talk about something a little bit warmer and fuzzier. Something that'll really open the cockles of your heart. Something like...rape

"Qualifications?"
"Rape, murder, arson, and rape."
"You said 'rape' twice."
"We like rape."
"Excellent! Sign here."
Dododecapod
17-10-2007, 19:26
So what'd you do?

Rustling cattle.

Not very evil...

Through the Vatican?

Kinky!
South Lorenya
17-10-2007, 19:36
Catgirls are sexy.
Linus and Lucy
17-10-2007, 19:39
Where da white women at?
Trotskylvania
17-10-2007, 19:41
Dilbert: What ethical person would board a sinking ship just to plunder its cargo?

Dogbert: "I can't tell you what I have planned for this company, but I'll tell you this: it rhymes with 'village'"
Soviestan
18-10-2007, 18:43
"Qualifications?"
"Rape, murder, arson, and rape."
"You said 'rape' twice."
"We like rape."
"Excellent! Sign here."

Its not rape. Its surprise butsecs, amirite?
The South Islands
18-10-2007, 18:51
ITT /b/
Three-Way
19-10-2007, 04:51
"Qualifications?"
"Rape, murder, arson, and rape."
"You said 'rape' twice."
"We like rape."
"Excellent! Sign here."

So what'd you do?

Rustling cattle.

Not very evil...

Through the Vatican?

Kinky!

Send a wire to the main office, and tell 'em that I said (*gets hit on the back of the head with a shovel*) OWWWWWWWW! (*falls down*)

(Man taking notes, writing while he speaks): "Send wire, main office, tell them I said 'OW'. Gotcha!" (*walks off*)
Wilgrove
19-10-2007, 05:01
Taggart: What do you want me to do, sir?
Hedley Lamarr: I want you to round up every vicious criminal and gunslinger in the west. Take this down.
[Taggart looks for a pen and paper while Hedley talks]
Hedley Lamarr: I want rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers and Methodists.
Taggart: [finding pen and paper] Could you repeat that, sir?

:D
Deputy Dan
19-10-2007, 05:05
There's been a lot of really bitter discussion over religion. So, I think that we need to talk about something a little bit warmer and fuzzier. Something that'll really open the cockles of your heart. Something like genocide. Or mass murder, that'd be good to. Or how about war crimes, rape, necrophilia (kick back and crack open a cold one ;) ), human sacrifice, cannibalism or Donald Trump's hair cut. Really despicable things that we can all agree on.

OK; how about Katganistan's avatar?

So what'd you do?

Rustling cattle.

Not very evil...

Through the Vatican?

Kinky!

Where da white women at?

Send a wire to the main office, and tell 'em that I said (*gets hit on the back of the head with a shovel*) OWWWWWWWW! (*falls down*)

(Man taking notes, writing while he speaks): "Send wire, main office, tell them I said 'OW'. Gotcha!" (*walks off*)

"Have you lost your mind? Can't you see that that man over there is a ni-" (*looks and realizes he's talking to Cleavon Little*) Sorry! Wrong person! (*goes and takes Harvey Korman instead*) "Have you lost your mind? Can't you see that that man over there is a ni-"

"The fool's going to... I mean the SHERIFF's going to DO it!"

"I!" (*Crowd repeats "I!") "Your name!" (*Instead of giving their individual names, crowd repeats the phrase "Your name!"*) "Pledge allegiance!" (*Crowd repeats "Pledge allegiance!" ) "To Hedley Lamarr! (*Crowd says "To Hedy Lamarr!"*) "That's Hedley!" (*Crowd repeats "That's Hedley!"*)
United Chicken Kleptos
19-10-2007, 05:05
There's been a lot of really bitter discussion over religion. So, I think that we need to talk about something a little bit warmer and fuzzier. Something that'll really open the cockles of your heart. Something like genocide. Or mass murder, that'd be good to. Or how about war crimes, rape, necrophilia (kick back and crack open a cold one ;) ), human sacrifice, cannibalism or Donald Trump's hair cut. Really despicable things that we can all agree on.

Necrophilia is fun. Wait, what?
JuNii
19-10-2007, 05:15
So what'd you do?

Stampeding cattle.

Not very evil...

Through the Vatican?

Kinky!

Corrected. ;)

see how many can guess where this one is from.

Colonel Ticonderoga: Let me just ask you one question. There's one thing I'm most curious about. Why bring the body here? My god, this is a home! People live here!
Jim: Well, Colonel, we didn't know exactly what to do with him.
Colonel Ticonderoga: Bury him! How 'bout that? Don't you think that's a good idea?
Jud: Oh, yes sir, yes sir, Colonel!
Colonel Ticonderoga: I mean, do you think that when somebody dies, they place them permanently on the family couch?
Jim: No sir.
Colonel Ticonderoga: Gee whi-iz!
Maineiacs
19-10-2007, 05:18
Republicans gave me cancer.

How's that for a non sequitur?
Soviet Houston
19-10-2007, 05:19
Send a wire to the main office, and tell 'em that I said (*gets hit on the back of the head with a shovel*) OWWWWWWWW! (*falls down*)

(Man taking notes, writing while he speaks): "Send wire, main office, tell them I said 'OW'. Gotcha!" (*walks off*)

Taggart: What do you want me to do, sir?
Hedley Lamarr: I want you to round up every vicious criminal and gunslinger in the west. Take this down.
[Taggart looks for a pen and paper while Hedley talks]
Hedley Lamarr: I want rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers and Methodists.
Taggart: [finding pen and paper] Could you repeat that, sir?

:D

"All right, we'll give some land to the n-----s and the c----s, but we don't want the Irish!"

Throw out your hands, stick out your tush,
Hands on your hips, give them a push,
You'll be surprised you're doing the French Mistake!
Voila!

"LePetomane Thruway?!" (*turns head*) "Hey somebody go back and get us a s---pot full of dimes!"

Hillbilly on rooftop: (*Looks through telescope; discerns that the approaching sheriff is black*) "The sheriff is a ni-" (*drowned out by church bell ringing*) "What did he say?" "The sheriff is near!" Hillbilly: "No, dag nabbit goldarnit dadblastit! The sheriff is a ni-" (*drowned out by church bell again*)

"Fifteen is my limit on schnitzengruben!"

(*holding self at gunpoint*) "Nobody move, or the n----- gets it!"
Maineiacs
19-10-2007, 05:24
"So, what's your name, cowboy?"

"Tex, ma'am."

"Tex ma'am? Well tell me, Tex ma'am, are you in showbiz?"

"No, ma'am."

"Then why don't you get your friggin' feet off the stage!"
Erisian chaoates
19-10-2007, 05:34
Here, have a paragraph I wrote for school. note: I mostly wrote it to piss off the teacher (It's a private Christian school, they gave me a list of topics to choose from, so I chose this)

Capital punishment should be used in every state. Many might ask why we should implement such a drastic policy. One of the reasons is simple economics. After all, housing, feeding and caring for millions of prisoners is a massive drain on our governments already floundering budget. It would be much cheaper to simply eliminate a large amount of that useless (Or rather, unused) population. Another reason is to curtail the massive overcrowding problem experienced by the U.S. prison system in general. Admittedly, 38 of the 50 states have already legalized capital punishment, but legalizing it in all of them would serve to reduce the stigma it currently carries and make it easier to push through legislature to speed up the process and increase efficiency. Finally, capital punishment is the perfect excuse for the implementation of wide-scale eugenics. If a prisoner is found to have detrimental genes, he can be removed from the gene pool without much ado if capital punishment is already in place. As when people hear about executions enough, eventually they’ll become desensitized to the idea of them and then capital punishment can be used to eliminate all manner of undesirable traits from the population. As you can see, with regards to monetary, logistic, and indeed genetic concerns, capital punishments implementation in all fifty states can only serve to improve the standard of living for every American the government deems has the right to live.
KneelBeforeZod
19-10-2007, 05:36
You say change the subject, do you? Very well then, here's a new subject:

KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!
Erisian chaoates
19-10-2007, 05:37
You say change the subject, do you? Very well then, here's a new subject:

KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!

Kneel before Eris.


Or y'know, just freak someone out, it's all the same.
Trotskylvania
19-10-2007, 06:38
Catgirls are sexy.

I see much kinky anime neko in you future!
The Brevious
19-10-2007, 09:04
You say change the subject, do you? Very well then, here's a new subject:

KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!
I knelt before Zod ... and I found a shiny penny! My day's looking up already!
This was on another thread?
The Brevious
19-10-2007, 09:06
I see much kinky anime neko in you future!

Or at least special scenes with Halle Berry. Grrroowwwwwwl.
http://www.tribuneindia.com/2004/20040822/spectrum/hl1.jpg
http://images.wikia.com/openserving/entertainment/images/thumb/8/8e/HalleBerryCatwoman.jpg/300px-HalleBerryCatwoman.jpg