NationStates Jolt Archive

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?

I don't see why people should be persistently happy, either. Optimism is such a waste.

The cynic is never dissapointed.

Negativity towards that which you perceive to be external and oppressive is generally a sign that you feel the need to validate your resentment towards those things. It's a normal habit of humans to reinforce their choices and beliefs with a two-fold strategy of preaching their own beliefs and complaining about others. This habit serves to increase their feeling of security in a world that makes them feel very insecure.

The cynic is never dissapointed.
Quite so - if I am ever inordinately happy I know quite well that something is going to reduce this considerably. Ergo, I spare myself the inevitable disappointment.

Apathy is the true sign of intelligence, I think.

The negativity stems from egotism.
Seriously, I know from experience ;)
People are negative and whiny because they see themselves as right while everybody and everything else is wrong. They can't control anybody else and they can't make the world operate in the way they think best so it makes them mad.
The problem is in believing that you have all the answers because, for whatever reason, you're better than everybody else (not meaning you in particular).

Has society conditioned people to be this way?

I blame Santa.

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?

For me, it would have to be because I'm handicapped and because of that I was picked on, beaten up, discriminated against and basically was bent over and I took it right up the poop chute (with no lube) when it came to organization like the FAA, Department of Motors Vehicles, Pfeiffer University, and the Cabarrus County School system. So after 23 years of the above, I have become a cynical reclusive guy who basically distrust and hate humanity.

Negative attitudes don't benefit me in the slightest, and aren't even remotely supported by the path of human history. I've got better things to do than fear the future.

As with above it goes along with my life philosophy.

If you expect nothing from someone then you can never be disappointed only get what you expect or be pleasantly surprised. Thus the Cynic is happier than the optimist.

As with above it goes along with my life philosophy.

If you expect nothing from someone then you can never be disappointed only get what you expect or be pleasantly surprised. Thus the Cynic is happier than the optimist.

Exactly.
I'm very optimistic about my pessimism.:)

I'm usually happy.

But there are some things where I really don't expect much good to happen. For instance, it's likely that my career path will prevent me from finding a nice, happy, long-lasting relationship. If I don't end up in a house full of cats, I'll be pleasantly surprised.

It's because being positive isn't rewarded in the real world :(

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?

Geez, Zilam, why are you only focusing on the bad things about people? Why can't you perceive them in a positive way? ;)

It's because being positive isn't rewarded in the real world :(

It seems like all of the world's most successful people are optimists.

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?
Meh.

*shrugs*

As with above it goes along with my life philosophy.

If you expect nothing from someone then you can never be disappointed only get what you expect or be pleasantly surprised. Thus the Cynic is happier than the optimist.

Indeed, quite true.

It seems like all of the world's most successful people are optimists.

Shit, I'd probably be more optimistic if I was among the worlds' most successful.
But then again, I'm a cynic.;)

Geez, Zilam, why are you only focusing on the bad things about people? Why can't you perceive them in a positive way? ;)


hah! I was waiting for that. To answer it though, its just an objective observation about people. When people are whiners, its usually subjective, because what ever is negative, is negative in their eyes.

It seems like all of the world's most successful people are optimists.
Of course they are. I'd be an optmist too if I was rich.

hah! I was waiting for that.

I figured. :p

Most of life is drab. Only success, wealth, and extreme emotions and states are not.

How can one find even Romantic beauty in the dull grey blurs that so tediously live out their lives in the dull grey sprawl of suburbia? In my experiance those people who are most engaging and interesting are either "alternative", rich, or both.

Perhaps they're being realistic and those who are not negative are not being realistic?

Without bad times / experiences we have no way of knowing what good times and experiences would feel like. Therefore a little bit of depression and negativity is normal.
To more directly answer the question though I would have to say that people thrive on pessimism because it is more easy to come by, and it's easier to come by.
Personally I eventually came to a piont in my life where I made a decision to avoid being depressed and much to my surprise I enjoy my life ten fold now. I make more money (quite a bit more), I get more sex, I am better liked and I care a lot less what people think of me.
To all you depressed people - stay sad, leave more of the worlds happiness to me and mine.

Without bad times / experiences we have no way of knowing what good times and experiences would feel like. Therefore a little bit of depression and negativity is normal.
To more directly answer the question though I would have to say that people thrive on pessimism because it is more easy to come by, and it's easier to come by.
Personally I eventually came to a piont in my life where I made a decision to avoid being depressed and much to my surprise I enjoy my life ten fold now. I make more money (quite a bit more), I get more sex, I am better liked and I care a lot less what people think of me.
To all you depressed people - stay sad, leave more of the worlds happiness to me and mine.

Because everybody who you deem depressed can cure it themselves? You clearly were not genuinely depressed, for it is a disease that requires help more than "manly strength of will".

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?

Hmm. Are you sure you arent psychologically projecting?

It seems like all of the world's most successful people are optimists.

Yes, but the question is: are they successful because of their optimism, or are the optimists because of their success?

Most people would say I'm negative, but that's not really true. I have an interest in human nature, especially the dark side of it. I see the world for what it is. The world isn't positive or negative, it just depends on each individual situation that has different impact on each person.

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?
I think you get a false sense of that from the people that inhabit this forum. I'm not sure what it is about them, but they truly seem to enjoy their cynicism about life.

I prefer to focus cynicism where it might do the most good. Politics and Money.

Of course they are. I'd be an optmist too if I was rich.

It doesn't work that way. You have to be optimistic about the future to make plans into it. Getting rich is just a reward for having confidence in the future.

Because everybody who you deem depressed can cure it themselves? You clearly were not genuinely depressed, for it is a disease that requires help more than "manly strength of will".

Fair enough. Perhaps it wasn't genuine depression. (It sure felt like it). And maybe it wasn't so much a decision I made as a series of events in my life that helped me realize that if I didn't do something for myself odds were good no one else would either.
I still feel that that depression is blamed on too many of many peoples problems, I don't feel it is a billion dollar industry just because all of a sudden everyone and their dog suddenly developed life threatening depressions.

Happy people don't buy things to make themselves feel better.

I think you get a false sense of that from the people that inhabit this forum. I'm not sure what it is about them, but they truly seem to enjoy their cynicism about life.

I prefer to focus cynicism where it might do the most good. Politics and Money.

I think part of this forums problem might be that some people are upset that they don't have friends out side of the internet, and they think they only count for something when posting a well thought out rebuttal on NS. Its thats the case, then I think I'd be negative like them.

For instance, I am just a poor college boy, min. wage job,and holes in most of my clothes, but this school year, there has yet to be a smile on my face.

You see folks? Poverty makes sadness. ;)

Happy people don't buy things to make themselves feel better.

You know, to be honest, people with money and things are probably less happy inside than most. For instance, I am just a poor college boy, min. wage job,and holes in most of my clothes, but this school year, there has yet to be a smile on my face. On the contrary, my mom has a nice truck, computer, and such, yet she is always miserable because she wants more and more. She gets feed up with her job because it doesn't give her enough for her to make a payment on a bigger truck, or a faster computer. I love my mom and all, but when it comes to this issue, I don't think I have much respect. She is always worrying about bills and crap, and as a result is always in a foul mood. If she would just give up her truck for a smaller car with a lower payment, and focus on spending time with family, and relaxing, then she would be happier.

You know, to be honest, people with money and things are probably less happy inside than most. For instance, I am just a poor college boy, min. wage job,and holes in most of my clothes, but this school year, there has yet to be a smile on my face. On the contrary, my mom has a nice truck, computer, and such, yet she is always miserable because she wants more and more. She gets feed up with her job because it doesn't give her enough for her to make a payment on a bigger truck, or a faster computer. I love my mom and all, but when it comes to this issue, I don't think I have much respect. She is always worrying about bills and crap, and as a result is always in a foul mood. If she would just give up her truck for a smaller car with a lower payment, and focus on spending time with family, and relaxing, then she would be happier.

Speaking of automobiles, it's hard to be sad with these bad boys (http://s160.photobucket.com/albums/t197/Urara322/) sitting in your garage.

You see folks? Poverty makes sadness. ;)

Naw, its not that. I have given myself a reason to be happy, mainly through my faith. I know I am not the greatest of believers, but I am actually getting a chance to help out, by teaching other Christians here at school. The happiness from seeing changed lives, and having a clean feeling about me overrides all other things.

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?

I've searched for the answer to this question for most of my adult life.

As near as I can tell, childen who didn't get to play with Play Doh enough as children grow into unhappy adults. *nod*

I've searched for the answer to this question for most of my adult life.

As near as I can tell, childen who didn't get to play with Play Doh enough as children grow into unhappy adults. *nod*

Well perhaps that explains me. I still find enjoyment with Play Doh!

Well perhaps that explains me. I still find enjoyment with Play Doh!

Who doesn't? Pity I can't find enough in one place to jump into. :(

I like most people and most thins. :)

Except Yankee fans. *glare*

Come midwinter I'll have my annual midwinter depression, which lasts a week or so. It's that whole "No sign of the sun since September" thing, but I get over rather quickly. Back to my usual peppy self after that for another fifty-or-so weeks.

I like most people and most thins. :)

Except Yankee fans. *glare*

Good choice. The Yankees suck.

Good choice. The Yankees suck.

Oh, they do more than suck. They are the root of all evil in this world. Trust me. And put on these handmade hats with the Yankee insignia crossed out with jarring red ink. They're made of tinfoil.

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?
Many middle- to upper-class white male heterosexuals find it hard to grasp the fact that the majority of humans on Earth don't enjoy the same perks as rich straight honkies. "Why," wonders the lad, "why are people so sad?"

People who don't have enough tend to be bummed about that. People who have the crap oppressed out of them tend to be cranky about it. People who are routinely abused will routinely be in a lousy mood.

If you faced the realities that confront the majority of humans living on Earth, you'd probably be a mite less chipper, too. I know I would.

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?

Hehe thats really funny. Asking why people are so negative, and then comeing out with the negative statment 'Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things' Cheers, you just made my day.

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?

I actualy disagree anyhoo. Not everybody is negative, everybody does not have a negative outlook on life, nor are people generaly unhappy.

If your perception is differant then perhaps you need to change your friends!

Plan for the worst, hope for the best. Then when you inevitably get screwed, atleast you planned for it.

I've searched for the answer to this question for most of my adult life.

As near as I can tell, childen who didn't get to play with Play Doh enough as children grow into unhappy adults. *nod*

Well perhaps that explains me. I still find enjoyment with Play Doh!

I played with play-doh all the time as a kid, and I'm miserable and depressed most of the time.

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?

Or, you could stop making assumptions about people and just go and fuck yourself.

****.

[/feeble attempt at humour]

Because people take themselves too seriously now a days and forget to laugh.

As with above it goes along with my life philosophy.

If you expect nothing from someone then you can never be disappointed only get what you expect or be pleasantly surprised. Thus the Cynic is happier than the optimist.

I don't know quite what to make of this. If you're joking, it's funny. If you're serious, I'm appalled.

Yes, but the question is: are they successful because of their optimism, or are the optimists because of their success?

Well, their optimism usually keeps them successful.

You know, to be honest, people with money and things are probably less happy inside than most. For instance, I am just a poor college boy, min. wage job,and holes in most of my clothes, but this school year, there has yet to be a smile on my face. On the contrary, my mom has a nice truck, computer, and such, yet she is always miserable because she wants more and more. She gets feed up with her job because it doesn't give her enough for her to make a payment on a bigger truck, or a faster computer. I love my mom and all, but when it comes to this issue, I don't think I have much respect. She is always worrying about bills and crap, and as a result is always in a foul mood. If she would just give up her truck for a smaller car with a lower payment, and focus on spending time with family, and relaxing, then she would be happier.

A study was conducted a few years ago. The results were that, after your initial needs are met (food, water, shelter, safety, clothing...), the amount of money you have doesn't have much effect on your happiness.

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?

Why are you so negative about other people's outlooks?

Why are you so negative about other people's outlooks?


He was just asking a question. Why does everyone have to twist everyone else's words and motives on this forum?

Why are you so negative about other people's outlooks?

But I am not negative on people's outlooks. I want to try and understand why there are so many unhappy people.

He was just asking a question. Why does everyone have to twist everyone else's words and motives on this forum?

Gawd, why are you being so negative about NSG?

I don't see why people should be persistently happy, either. Optimism is such a waste.

Not really. Assume there is a fifty-fifty chance that things will get better (optimism is correct, in other words). Although it is just as likely the optimist is wrong, there is a difference: he is happy.

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?

At this point in my life I currently don't care, because pretty much everything sucks right now.

Not really. Assume there is a fifty-fifty chance that things will get better (optimism is correct, in other words). Although it is just as likely the optimist is wrong, there is a difference: he is happy.

Wrong. The pessimist is the better gambler; if everything goes tits up, he has planned for this, expected it, and is thus prepared. By contrast, if things go rather well, he is doubly as happy as the optimist in the same situation.

Wrong. The pessimist is the better gambler; if everything goes tits up, he has planned for this, expected it, and is thus prepared. By contrast, if things go rather well, he is doubly as happy as the optimist in the same situation.

No, there is a difference between being pessimistic and being realistic. A hardcore pessimist (which may not actually exist) would see no point in preparing for the worst, as it will happen anyway. If things go well, he will continue to fear the worst is about to happen.

Keep in mind, the people we are describing are not real. No one, except maybe the clinically depressed, believes things will get worse, nor does anyone, except the delusional, think things can only get better. But in general, a more optimistic person is better off than a more pessimistic person.

Not really. Assume there is a fifty-fifty chance that things will get better (optimism is correct, in other words). Although it is just as likely the optimist is wrong, there is a difference: he is deluded.

Fixed and reposted.

Don't forget that the unhappy tend to be louder than the content. Have you ever seen a political rally that was held because people were happy with the way things were?

People on the whole are not so negative about life as it might seem, you're just more likely to hear about it when they are.

Fixed and reposted.

Being optimistic is no more deluded than being pessimistic. Both unreasonably assume the outcome of the future.

Why is it that people are so negative in life? Everyone always seem to have a negative outlook towards things, alternative ideas, or groups of people that are different. I just don't understand why people are so negative, and whiny, and generally unhappy. What is so bad that people must think all of life is a drab? Has society conditioned people to be this way?


You're just keeping the wrong company. Stop hanging out with goddamned emos and ditch your whiney f***ing friends. Replace them with optimists (who, in my opinion, are equally unrealistically biased) or if you're really smart, hang out with committed stoics.

Don't forget that the unhappy tend to be louder than the content. Have you ever seen a political rally that was held because people were happy with the way things were?

People on the whole are not so negative about life as it might seem, you're just more likely to hear about it when they are.

That's true. People tend to take what they have good for granted, and complain about what is wrong with the world (not an entirely bad tendency).

Many middle- to upper-class white male heterosexuals

I think just about every other post you make singles out this group. I'm waiting for you to make sunspots and tornadoes the fault of white maledom.

What makes you think rich white women, or rich northern indian hermaphrodites for that matter don't experience ennui ? There's nothing particulaly white or male about bitching. Honestly, your misandry is showing.