Remote Observer
13-08-2007, 16:26
Yes, it's time for today's hilarious translation...
If you can find similar hilarity in another religious book, please post it in this thread.
From the Koran.
http://www.usc.edu/dept/MSA/fundamentals/hadithsunnah/bukhari/052.sbt.html#004.052.276
Volume 4, Book 52, Number 276:
Narrated Al-Bara bin Azib:
The Prophet appointed 'Abdullah bin Jubair as the commander of the infantry men (archers) who were fifty on the day (of the battle) of Uhud. He instructed them, "Stick to your place, and don't leave it even if you see birds snatching us, till I send for you; and if you see that we have defeated the infidels and made them flee, even then you should not leave your place till I send for you." Then the infidels were defeated. By Allah, I saw the women fleeing lifting up their clothes revealing their leg-bangles and their legs. So, the companions of 'Abdullah bin Jubair said, "The booty! O people, the booty ! Your companions have become victorious, what are you waiting for now?" 'Abdullah bin Jubair said, "Have you forgotten what Allah's Apostle said to you?" They replied, "By Allah! We will go to the people (i.e. the enemy) and collect our share from the war booty." But when they went to them, they were forced to turn back defeated. At that time Allah's Apostle in their rear was calling them back. Only twelve men remained with the Prophet and the infidels martyred seventy men from us.
This verse appears similar to those you might find in the Old Testament, where God gives orders through some Prophet to fight a certain way, and the people fail, and so God hands them over to their enemies.
So, yes, I do get the meaning of this portion.
But the idea of men watching women run away, showing their legs, and the men becoming excited enough to shout, "The booty! The booty!" - well, I had to clean off my keyboard.
So - your task is to find something from Christianity, Judaism, Buddhism, or any other religion, that's hilarious if read in a modern context.
If you can find similar hilarity in another religious book, please post it in this thread.
From the Koran.
http://www.usc.edu/dept/MSA/fundamentals/hadithsunnah/bukhari/052.sbt.html#004.052.276
Volume 4, Book 52, Number 276:
Narrated Al-Bara bin Azib:
The Prophet appointed 'Abdullah bin Jubair as the commander of the infantry men (archers) who were fifty on the day (of the battle) of Uhud. He instructed them, "Stick to your place, and don't leave it even if you see birds snatching us, till I send for you; and if you see that we have defeated the infidels and made them flee, even then you should not leave your place till I send for you." Then the infidels were defeated. By Allah, I saw the women fleeing lifting up their clothes revealing their leg-bangles and their legs. So, the companions of 'Abdullah bin Jubair said, "The booty! O people, the booty ! Your companions have become victorious, what are you waiting for now?" 'Abdullah bin Jubair said, "Have you forgotten what Allah's Apostle said to you?" They replied, "By Allah! We will go to the people (i.e. the enemy) and collect our share from the war booty." But when they went to them, they were forced to turn back defeated. At that time Allah's Apostle in their rear was calling them back. Only twelve men remained with the Prophet and the infidels martyred seventy men from us.
This verse appears similar to those you might find in the Old Testament, where God gives orders through some Prophet to fight a certain way, and the people fail, and so God hands them over to their enemies.
So, yes, I do get the meaning of this portion.
But the idea of men watching women run away, showing their legs, and the men becoming excited enough to shout, "The booty! The booty!" - well, I had to clean off my keyboard.
So - your task is to find something from Christianity, Judaism, Buddhism, or any other religion, that's hilarious if read in a modern context.