NationStates Jolt Archive

And these are a little too close to home (http://www.wftv.com/news/13681617/detail.html) for my taste.
EDGEWATER, Fla. -- An Edgewater councilwoman and her husband are under investigation for allegedly performing an exorcism on their 18-year-old daughter. Police have recommended the State Attorney's Office file charges of battery and false imprisonment against Debra and Daniel Rogers.

Investigators said the couple admitted they tried to exorcise the demons out of their daughter by pouring olive oil on her while they held her hands behind her back on June 27. Their attorney said the Edgewater councilwoman and her husband are innocent.

"I don't think any person should have to endure what occurred that night," said Edgewater Police Detective Heather Brady.

Detectives said it all started when the 18-year-old got into a yelling match with her twin sister. Her father told police he was trying to anoint his daughter with olive oil to "cast the demons out of her."
Damn. Olive oil for an exorcism? Everyone knows you're supposed to use canola.

How come every time I see a little hope for humanity, it gets squashed back down into the grave?

Hey, you have to remember that it's Florida we're talking about.

At least he didn't use motor oil...[/worst silver lining ever]

How come every time I see a little hope for humanity, it gets squashed back down into the grave?

two entire people adequately represent the other 6.6 billion?

Hey, you have to remember that it's Florida we're talking about.

Hmmm true. You know, this would be deliciously ironic if it was in Kansas or Kentucky though.

Hmmm true. You know, this would be deliciously ironic if it was in Kansas or Kentucky though.

Yeah, in that case, I would've laughed.

Wait, so some crazy parents poured olive oil all over there naked 18 year old daughter?

Hmmm true. You know, this would be deliciously ironic if it was in Kansas or Kentucky though.
This is Edgewater. It's practically Kansas or Kentucky. You have to understand that civilization in Florida is basically south of I-4, with islands of it around Saint Augustine and Jacksonville. :D

Wait, so some crazy parents poured olive oil all over there naked 18 year old daughter?

I don't think she was naked, but other than that, yeah. In an attempt to get the demons out of her.

Yeah, in that case, I would've laughed.

I would've printed out the story in a huge stack and just pass them out with either the picture of the Phelps Family, or the Creation Museum (depending on where the story took place) and under the picture it'd say "This happened in the same state that they reside in."

I would be laughing the whole time too.

They should've done it before the kid turned 18 - less red tape, I believe. :p

I don't think she was naked, but other than that, yeah. In an attempt to get the demons out of her.

Why do I automatically think that this may be incest and that this whole exorcism excuse is total bull?

Welcome to what goes on in my mind half the time. :D

You don't want to know about the other half.

Wait....they poured olive oil on her? What are they being charged for? 'Failure to properly oil there daughter before exorcism'?

I know, parents have strange ways of trying to make their children behave...but why do the police have to be in on this?

Police found the teen's clothes torn off in the struggle
I'm guessing naked.






And covered in olive oil.

Wait....they poured olive oil on her? What are they being charged for? 'Failure to properly oil there daughter before exorcism'?

I know, parents have strange ways of trying to make their children behave...but why do the police have to be in on this?

You can't just detain an adult and perform rituals on them, even if they're your own kid. ;)

I'm guessing naked.






And covered in olive oil.

Damn. How did I miss that?

You can't just detain an adult and perform rituals on them, even if they're your own kid. ;)

Yep. The magic number here is 18.

Oh, didn't read the whole story ^^"

Ya, well, I hope she doesn't have any more personal demons. (Horrible pun....I really need to go to sleep now -_-)

Wait....they poured olive oil on her? What are they being charged for? 'Failure to properly oil there daughter before exorcism'?

I know, parents have strange ways of trying to make their children behave...but why do the police have to be in on this?

According to the article...


Police found the teen's clothes torn off in the struggle and bruises on her arm and knees


...so the police involvement probably has to do with the battery and false imprisonment. Like the OP says.

Yep. The magic number here is 18.

Or any number, considering the apparent injury caused by the whole mess.

Yea, my mind is leaning more towards Incest rather than exorcism.

I'm sick....I know.

If you're right, then that adds a whole 'nother level of fucked-upped-ness to the situation. How fucked must your family be to use exorcism as an excuse for something else?

Damn. How did I miss that?

Yea, my mind is leaning more towards Incest rather than exorcism.

I'm sick....I know.

Yea, my mind is leaning more towards Incest rather than exorcism.

I'm sick....I know.

No they're sick. You are pessimistic. (pretend that that was spelled right)

So did they get rid of the demons or not? :p

No they're sick. You are pessimistic. (pretend that that was spelled right)

No need to pretend. ;)

No they're sick. You are pessimistic. (pretend that that was spelled right)

What about optimistic?




Just kidding guys...

So did they get rid of the demons or not? :p

Well it depends on whether or not they used contraceptive.

Hey, you have to remember that it's Florida we're talking about.

Yeah, it could have been California - probably would have been something esoteric though, like garlic-infused olive oil. Or is that for vampires?

I'm guessing naked.






And covered in olive oil.

Kinky.


There, that had to be said.

Kinky.


There, that had to be said.

aww you made my day!:fluffle:

Wait, so some crazy parents poured olive oil all over there naked 18 year old daughter?

I'm guessing it was Extra Virgin.

I'm guessing it was Extra Virgin.
Maybe not--that might have been the reason for the fight in the first place. ;)

Maybe not--that might have been the reason for the fight in the first place. ;)
Ahh...
She lost her virginity so they poured Virgin Olive oil to somehow bring it back.
Right..
...
....
.....
*Brain snaps*

It turns out the demons identified themselves as *Vodka, Gin, Sex and Liberal Media*

My first thought echoes Dinaverg: Kinky!

Why olive oil? Do demons hate italian food? Do they have high cholesterol? WHat do these parents know that the rest of us are missing?

I think we'll have a deeper understanding of both the real and supernatural universes if we knew why olive oil exorcises demons. *nod*

I'm guessing she's the evil twin?

1. Holy Water
2. Blessed Crucifix
3. Exorcism Book
4. ???
5. Profit

I think we'll have a deeper understanding of both the real and supernatural universes if we knew why olive oil exorcises demons. *nod*

...because 'olive' is an anagram of 'devil' if you add a line to the o - the line represents the divide between God and Lucifer. Devil oil burns Lucifer.

Honestly, these things are very simple to understand if you read the Bible properly.

...because 'olive' is an anagram of 'devil' if you add a line to the o - the line represents the divide between God and Lucifer. Devil oil burns Lucifer.

Honestly, these things are very simple to understand if you read the Bible properly.
Day-um. That's good.

...because 'olive' is an anagram of 'devil' if you add a line to the o - the line represents the divide between God and Lucifer. Devil oil burns Lucifer.

Honestly, these things are very simple to understand if you read the Bible properly.

Impressive. :)

Day-um. That's good.

Impressive. :)

I can at last tell my parents that all those years they spent down the mines to pay for my education were not years spent in vain - as testified by someone from Florida itself and a clown....doh!

I can at last tell my parents that all those years they spent down the mines to pay for my education were not years spent in vain - as testified by someone from Florida itself and a clown....doh!

Your certificate is in the mail. :cool:

Your certificate is in the mail. :cool:

I'm guessing the same 'mail' the check is in :mad:

Wait....they poured olive oil on her? What are they being charged for? 'Failure to properly oil there daughter before exorcism'?

I know, parents have strange ways of trying to make their children behave...but why do the police have to be in on this?


What are you kidding? Belief in demons and possession is a classic sign of schizophrenia. Many, many times when parents believe that their kids are "possessed", the kids end up dead.

For instance:
Andrea Yates (hhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andrea_Yates)

Many serial murders believe that their victims are sinful or possessed by demons.

In a case in Mississippi, a woman judged criminally insane poured boiling water on the genitals of her 14 year old son because she believed that he was masturbating.

Many ignorant fundamentalists mistake mental illness with demonic possession Autism or Demonic Possession? 8 year old killed in exorcism attempt (http://barnson.org/node/77)

Freedom of religion doesn't cover psychos torturing their kids to cast out demons. They are nucking futz and need to be put away in a laughing academy where they can deal with their own demons.

I pity any poor children that have religious lunatics for parents.

I'm guessing the same 'mail' the check is in :mad:

I think he meant it's in the "male."

I have no idea what I meant by that--I just wanted to bump the thread. :p

Hey, you have to remember that it's Florida we're talking about.

The world is crazy - you don't have to go to Florida to see crazy.

Hey, you have to remember that it's Florida we're talking about.
Yeah, this kind of stuff is why every Friday on Major Geeks the news is dedicated to something fucked up in Florida.

The world is crazy - you don't have to go to Florida to see crazy.
Depends how hard you want to look for it.

I think he meant it's in the "male."

Ah, so the USPS finally caved on anal mailbags?

I have no idea what I meant by that--I just wanted to bump the thread. :p

"There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again."

Wait, so some crazy parents poured olive oil all over there naked 18 year old daughter?

This thread needs pictures.

Wait....they poured olive oil on her? What are they being charged for? 'Failure to properly oil there daughter before exorcism'?

I know, parents have strange ways of trying to make their children behave...but why do the police have to be in on this?

WTF? Did you read the story?

Detective Brady said police believe this wasn't the first time this happened.

"This is bizarre, but this apparently was a normal occurrence," Brady said.

Police found the teen's clothes torn off in the struggle and bruises on her arm and knees. At first, she was taken into police custody for a psychological evaluation, but she was released almost immediately.

The teen is now staying at a safe house.

"Investigation has revealed she attempted to get away. She didn't want that to occur and she received injuries during that," Brady said.

How could the police not be involved?

This thread needs pictures.
Second.

Depends how hard you want to look for it.

Google is your friend.

http://www.katc.com/Global/story.asp?S=6779611

The Lafourche ordinance approved 5-4 on Wednesday by the Parish Council goes beyond saggy pants that expose underpants or buttocks _ the target of the Pointe Coupee proposal and the one sought by Lafourche council member Lindel Toups.

If Lafourche Parish President Charlotte Randolph signs the ordinance, it will be illegal for anyone to reveal any underwear or dress in a manner "not becoming to his or her sex."

Not even remotely compare.

Not even remotely compare.

This one's pretty crazy...

SYDNEY, Australia - A driver stranded on a remote stretch of Australian highway Wednesday tried to summon help by playing dead in the middle of the road, a police officer said.
A woman who was driving with her two children spotted the man and had to swerve to avoid hitting him, said Doug Backhouse, a detective with the Western Australia state police.
"She drove around the body — which didn't move at all — and got to the nearest phone," Backhouse said.
Local police arrived with an ambulance and found the man alive and well, but with car troubles.
"The best way he thought to get a vehicle to stop was to lay down in the middle of the road and pretend to be dead," Backhouse said, adding that the man didn't think anyone would stop if he were standing up.
Police said they told the man that lying in the road was "a stupid thing to do," but didn't charge him with any offense.
The incident occurred near Esperance, about 450 miles southeast of the state capital, Perth.

Try that around here, and the whole stream of traffic will run you over...

The power of Christ compelled them.

This is Edgewater. It's practically Kansas or Kentucky. You have to understand that civilization in Florida is basically south of I-4, with islands of it around Saint Augustine and Jacksonville. :D

I live south of I-4...yay! :)


That's pretty messed up though. An exorcism? :eek:

Try that around here, and the whole stream of traffic will run you over...
Which would be a more interesting story.

Had that been in Florida...
The man would have laid down in the middle of the road. Some old person would have run them over and dragged them for a few miles under the car and then gotten pulled over by a cop who would find the body under the car.

Or a soccer mom would have swerved around him only to have the SUV she was driving flip over in the middle of the road on top of the man, cause a car coming the other way to crash off the side of the road and back up the highway for miles.

All right, let's go over what we learn from the article:

1) girl on girl fight

2) 18-yr-old girl stripped, restrained, and covered with oil

3) lots of struggling and ritualistic role play

And "exorcism" is the new euphemism for this, I guess? Riiiiight... :rolleyes:

Also, the quote from the sheriff about how it seemed to be a "normal occurrence" - I assume he meant it happened regularly in that household. Yeah, uh-huh, no child abuse masquerading as religion there.

Which would be a more interesting story.

Had that been in Florida...
The man would have laid down in the middle of the road. Some old person would have run them over and dragged them for a few miles under the car and then gotten pulled over by a cop who would find the body under the car.

Or a soccer mom would have swerved around him only to have the SUV she was driving flip over in the middle of the road on top of the man, cause a car coming the other way to crash off the side of the road and back up the highway for miles.

And then, someone would stop and rub oil on them...

Summary:
*History of Mental problems being "Demons".*

Some of the "Human monsters" were illinesses and problems as well.

And it's rumored that the 'evil' behavior of the "Witches" in the Salem Witch trials were in fact caused by Halluginetic Mushrooms.

Does anyone from the UK remember the live exorcism done on channel 4? It was one of the most pathetic yet hilarious things i've ever seen.

Does anyone from the UK remember the live exorcism done on channel 4? It was one of the most pathetic yet hilarious things i've ever seen.No, but I'd have loved to have done a MST3K night based on it.

And it's rumored that the 'evil' behavior of the "Witches" in the Salem Witch trials were in fact caused by Halluginetic Mushrooms.

Eh. I saw an article on that once. The conclusion was that it was pretty unlikely. The stuff that was hallucinogenic was well-known, and not likely to be accidentally ingested repeatedly. :p

Eh. I saw an article on that once. The conclusion was that it was pretty unlikely. The stuff that was hallucinogenic was well-known, and not likely to be accidentally ingested repeatedly. :p
The one I read blamed it on argot(?) that grew in the rye used as a primary od source for the Salem township. Same idea--the food caused hallucinations.

The one I read blamed it on argot(?) that grew in the rye used as a primary od source for the Salem township. Same idea--the food caused hallucinations.

Ergot. Argot's slang, usually prison slang, I believe. :p

http://www.straightdope.com/columns/050114.html

That one's also not too likely. It's amazing though, that by all accounts the hallucinogenic and poisonous plants were widely known by even many average people back then - I doubt too many people today would know what they were looking at. :p Between farmers and the local Indians having had experience with them, most of the dangerous hallucinogens were well-known, from what I've read. Early literature seems to back it up.