NationStates Jolt Archive

MASS SPOILERS AHOY!







































http://one.fsphost.com/potterspoiler/

What do you think? I'm still confused about what the guy just made up, and what's real. Some of it seems legit.

Here are the last pages. :D

Ok, maybe not, Junii told me to take it down.

But here's the gist of it: Harry marries Ginny, three kids, Ron marries Hermione, Lupin marries Tonks (I think), Draco has a kid, Snape is headmaster.

:eek:
OMG! Spoilarz!

Meh, I actually don't really care that much, might as well wait awhile after all the madness had calm down, then I'll read it.

a son :eek:

I haven't read any of them (I missed the fad by about 20 years) but I hear they all die. Could be a rumor though. :p

You probably should have put the spoiler warning in the thread title, as someone could read subsequent pages from the OP and get spoiled.

I put a spoiler warning in the OP. Mods, could you put one in the title? Please don't delete >_<

Here are the last pages. :D

I would remove that if I were you. the Publisher was pissed at the website that had the actual book on-line and gave spoilers. they could order a C&D to Jolt and/or Max Berry.

I would rather not have this site in any legal troubles.

I would remove that if I were you. the Publisher was pissed at the website that had the actual book on-line and gave spoilers. they could order a C&D to Jolt and/or Max Berry.

I would rather not have this site in any legal troubles.

Fine.

I would remove that if I were you. the Publisher was pissed at the website that had the actual book on-line and gave spoilers. they could order a C&D to Jolt and/or Max Berry.

I would rather not have this site in any legal troubles.

Aye.

Though I must admit I immediately started searching torrent sites when I read this because I thought the entire book was leaked. (Mainly because I'm starved for some new entertainment and I am curious to see the end of this series.)

Aye.

Though I must admit I immediately started searching torrent sites when I read this because I thought the entire book was leaked. (Mainly because I'm starved for some new entertainment and I am curious to see the end of this series.)

Feh, you know the ending. Everyone marries everyone and has kids.

Aye.

Though I must admit I immediately started searching torrent sites when I read this because I thought the entire book was leaked. (Mainly because I'm starved for some new entertainment and I am curious to see the end of this series.)

I heard several news stories that the Publisher sicced their lawyers on any site that released spoilers before the book was published. and since the US release hasn't occured yet, I rather not take the chance of being bitten by a rabid lawyer. :p

Feh, you know the ending. Everyone marries everyone and has kids.

after reading some of the Ship Fanfics... I now have images of Harry and Lucius Malfoy in a Same Sex Cerimony...

:headbang:

I heard several news stories that the Publisher sicced their lawyers on any site that released spoilers before the book was published. and since the US release hasn't occured yet, I rather not take the chance of being bitten by a rabid lawyer. :p

Well, it's not like they can stop it. Nothing can stop the Internet. I've told tons of people already.

after reading some of the Ship Fanfics... I now have images of Harry and Lucius Malfoy in a Same Sex Cerimony...

:headbang:

No, no, dear god no. Harry and Ginny, Ron and Hermione, Lupin and Tonks. Remember it, believe it, please don't give me that mental image ever again.

I heard several news stories that the Publisher sicced their lawyers on any site that released spoilers before the book was published. and since the US release hasn't occured yet, I rather not take the chance of being bitten by a rabid lawyer. :p

When is the release date again?

When is the release date again?

My mum says next Saturday.

Did I mention how annoyed I am at Harry? His wife is hot >_<

always though it would end with Harry on the dole in a one room bedsit

always though it would end with Harry on the dole in a one room bedsit

Nah, turns out he's getting more sex than all of us. Which is bullshit, 'cause he's a nerd! You're a nerd, Potter!

My mum says next Saturday.

Thank you, Rusty.

And I really recommend you take the spoilers out of your signature, lest the mods bring down the wrath of Ban Hammer or something.

Nah, turns out he's getting more sex than all of us. Which is bullshit, 'cause he's a nerd! You're a nerd, Potter!

Damm

Thank you, Rusty.

And I really recommend you take the spoilers out of your signature, lest the mods bring down the wrath of Ban Hammer or something.

Fine. Ruin ALL my fun.

Moderator danke.

Here is your Spoilers......

Gandalf kills them all...and JRR Tolkien rises from the dead with zombie Lenin (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CLe6fhBejNI)...and JK Rowling will write a new book about a magical Raccoon named squiggles who has an afro (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERsUdYjgjIk&mode=related&search=)


Or this will happen (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GNcw5uBEnEA)

Enjoy...:D :D :D

Is there another link?

Is there another link?

Rawr it's down!

Crap. Oh well. Better luck next time. Although I can more or less sum up the epilogue.

I want it to be out already! Wah! This waiting stuff sucks.

I heard the final line was gonna be;

After reaching the dining room, Harry and Ron turned their wands on themselves.

Come on thats so good it got to be true!


But really I rekon Harry will turn evil and Ron and Hermione will have to take him down. Then Rowling can get out of writing more, but if she get done for tax evasion or wastes her money or something (you know the crap all thoose types do). She can rehash the books with Harry as Voldermort, I can see it now Garry Cotter or Larry Hotter.

Here are the last pages. :D

Ok, maybe not, Junii told me to take it down.

But here's the gist of it: Harry marries Ginny, three kids, Ron marries Hermione, Lupin marries Tonks (I think), Draco has a kid, Snape is headmaster.

Snape becomes headmaster? I don't think so. The rest are at least somewhat plausible. I just don't see Snape becoming Headmaster.

Snape becomes headmaster? I don't think so. The rest are at least somewhat plausible. I just don't see Snape becoming Headmaster.

Sounds like something Rowling would do...

The next book will be one line long:
Rocks fell. Everyone died.

The next book will be one line long:
Rocks fell. Everyone died.

Yet that line will somehow take up 1,037 pages and cost $39.99 + tax.

Yet that line will somehow take up 1,037 pages and cost $39.99 + tax.
Really big fonts, and lots of pictures.

Yet that line will somehow take up 1,037 pages and cost $39.99 + tax.

And they'll make a three hour movie out of it.

Read it last night. I don't think the epilogue was real. See, the writing was completely out of character for Rowling. It read like some Fan Fiction writer.

Aye.

Though I must admit I immediately started searching torrent sites when I read this because I thought the entire book was leaked. (Mainly because I'm starved for some new entertainment and I am curious to see the end of this series.)

It comes out in a week. Surely you can wait a little longer? :p

Snape becomes headmaster? I don't think so. The rest are at least somewhat plausible. I just don't see Snape becoming Headmaster.

it's possible. if something happened to McGonigal.

Read it last night. I don't think the epilogue was real. See, the writing was completely out of character for Rowling. It read like some Fan Fiction writer.

Why would they go to the trouble to actually PRINT it?

At least some of it has to be real, since it's down now. The publisher's lawyer squad probably got it removed.

Why would they go to the trouble to actually PRINT it?

Photoshop. Given the quality of the pictures, photoshopping them wouldn't be that tough. The only thing that makes that seem unlikely is that they have pictures which are both in the style of the illustrator and, I beleive, unique. However, given that the author is, himself, apparently unreliable from line to line, I'm not sure that he is a reliable source. Given that it also doesn't have the more airy nature of much of Rowling's prose, and the name Albus Severus is actually used (along with Lily and James?), it reads like Fan Fiction.

Of course, I will publicly acknowledge that I am wrong if, when I get the book, that is the last chapter.

Photoshop. Given the quality of the pictures, photoshopping them wouldn't be that tough. The only thing that makes that seem unlikely is that they have pictures which are both in the style of the illustrator and, I beleive, unique. However, given that the author is, himself, apparently unreliable from line to line, I'm not sure that he is a reliable source. Given that it also doesn't have the more airy nature of much of Rowling's prose, and the name Albus Severus is actually used (along with Lily and James?), it reads like Fan Fiction.

Of course, I will publicly acknowledge that I am wrong if, when I get the book, that is the last chapter.

Hey, if that's PS, it's some top fucking PS. I wish I could PS like that.

I'll be disappointed if that's not the real ending, I quite liked it. Cliched as all hell, but at least it's happy.

Hey, if that's PS, it's some top fucking PS. I wish I could PS like that.


Wouldn't really be that hard, if you had the skills, to do most of it. All you need is a book and the images of the cover (which are available). Cleaning the text from that book wouldn't be difficult (cleaners for Manga do the same thing). Rowling lists what font she uses in the back of each book. Given the quality of the images themselves (unfortunately, I read it last night, and as they are no longer available, I am functioning on imperfect memory), imperfections might be hard to notice.

Sorry for the Double Post, but I've done a bit of research. Apparently this origionated on 4chan. That tends to arouse my suspicion. Not only are the /R/etards or whatever the fuck they call themselves (t/r/olls?) known for Photoshop usage, it also explains the inconsitent nature of the claims. I call hoax.

Sorry for the Double Post, but I've done a bit of research. Apparently this origionated on 4chan. That tends to arouse my suspicion. Not only are the /R/etards or whatever the fuck they call themselves (t/r/olls?) known for Photoshop usage, it also explains the inconsitent nature of the claims. I call hoax.

Aye. It's a hoax.

But then, there were those who said Snape killing Dumbledore was a hoax, we all know how that turned out.

Meh. I didn't read the pictures anyway so it's not as if I actually know what the (fake) spoilers were.

Aye. It's a hoax.

But then, there were those who said Snape killing Dumbledore was a hoax, we all know how that turned out.

Meh. I didn't read the pictures anyway so it's not as if I actually know what the (fake) spoilers were.

Found a second copy of the epilogue pictures (not posting them). There is no dustjacket. It's even more apparently a fake.

Found a second copy of the epilogue pictures (not posting them). There is no dustjacket. It's even more apparently a fake.

Can you TG me the links? I'm curious to look at them, even if they are fakes.

Feh. Even if it is fake, it probably kicks the shit of how it actually will end.

What bothers me is why the site is down if it's just fake.

Can you TG me the links? I'm curious to look at them, even if they are fakes.

Sent.

And to FO, from what I'm reading, people are putting these sites up and taking them down to ensure that no one can figure out where it started. 30 minutes of searching brought me only a couple more copies of the link I sent Kyronea.

Sent.

And to FO, from what I'm reading, people are putting these sites up and taking them down to ensure that no one can figure out where it started. 30 minutes of searching brought me only a couple more copies of the link I sent Kyronea.

Thank you.

And yeah, it's obviously a fake, though a pretty decent one that can fool those who don't know how to look for fakes.

Thank you.

And yeah, it's obviously a fake, though a pretty decent one that can fool those who don't know how to look for fakes.

No problem.

What gave it away is the inconsitency between the two documents. The "Ron Weasley is killed by Bellatrix Lestrange" conflicts directly with the epilogue. So does the claim, further up the page, that the epilogue is in newspaper form. Clearly at least one, and (given the presentation) both are false.

No problem.

What gave it away is the inconsitency between the two documents. The "Ron Weasley is killed by Bellatrix Lestrange" conflicts directly with the epilogue. So does the claim, further up the page, that the epilogue is in newspaper form. Clearly at least one, and (given the presentation) both are false.

I imagined he did that on purpose, just to fuck with us. The epilogue looked pretty real, the rest was fake.

I imagined he did that on purpose, just to fuck with us. The epilogue looked pretty real, the rest was fake.

There have been a few observations made regarding the epilogue. The first is that the prose reads like a much more heavy-handed author than Rowling. The second is that the book has no cover, and that makes it that much easier to Photoshop. The third is that the format isn't quite right.

Here are the last pages. :D

Ok, maybe not, Junii told me to take it down.

But here's the gist of it: Harry marries Ginny, three kids, Ron marries Hermione, Lupin marries Tonks (I think), Draco has a kid, Snape is headmaster.

I hear Hermione (And Hagrid) both die.

I hear Hermione (And Hagrid) both die.

That claim appears to have been unsubstantiated. It was posted on a hacking mailing-list by an anonymous user.

That claim appears to have been unsubstantiated. It was posted on a hacking mailing-list by an anonymous user.

So I hear. I wouldn't really be too suprised if either Hermione or Ron get offed, though.

So I hear. I wouldn't really be too suprised if either Hermione or Ron get offed, though.

I'm guessing Ron. They bump off father figures/mentors to Harry, bigger each time. The only way she can top Dumbledore dying is Ron and/or Harry going. I'll be upset if Harry doesn't die but he probably will.

I'm guessing Ron. They bump off father figures/mentors to Harry, bigger each time. The only way she can top Dumbledore dying is Ron and/or Harry going. I'll be upset if Harry doesn't die but he probably will.

I'm almost sure that Harry will die. On a side note, Sirius might come back from the dead, and I'm terrifed that Neville will die, even though I really don't think he will.

I'm almost sure that Harry will die. On a side note, Sirius might come back from the dead, and I'm terrifed that Neville will die, even though I really don't think he will.

Poor Neville, I love him so. :(

I'm almost sure that Harry will die. On a side note, Sirius might come back from the dead, and I'm terrifed that Neville will die, even though I really don't think he will.

Why do you think Sirius might come back?
I don't think he will just because they went on for so long about once you're done you're gone, no coming bak from the dead blah, blah, blah
I also, hope Neville doesn't die. I hope that Harry, being a horcrux will have to be killed and Neville will do it and ultimately defeat the darklord etc. because he was marked by the darklord, not physically but his parents insanity affected him greatly.
I also think that Wormtails hand will hve something to do with something. They put too much emphisis on Wormtail owes Harry and cannot harm him in the third book. And the prophecy says that one must die at the hand of the other. J. K. said that she phrased the prophecy carefully, and at first glance it seems simplistic so I think that there will be a twist with that. Or concerning the change of verb from neither can live while the other survives (they talk about half lives with the unicorn blood in book 1). I dunno...

Why do you think Sirius might come back?
I don't think he will just because they went on for so long about once you're done you're gone, no coming bak from the dead blah, blah, blah
I also, hope Neville doesn't die. I hope that Harry, being a horcrux will have to be killed and Neville will do it and ultimately defeat the darklord etc. because he was marked by the darklord, not physically but his parents insanity affected him greatly.
I also think that Wormtails hand will have something to do with something. They put too much emphisis on Wormtail owes Harry and cannot harm him in the third book. And the prophecy says that one must die at the hand of the other. J. K. said that she phrased the prophecy carefully, and at first glance it seems simplistic so I think that there will be a twist with that. Or concerning the change of verb from neither can live while the other survives (they talk about half lives with the unicorn blood in book 1). I dunno...

I dunno. They never said Sirius was really dead-he just passed through the veil. Who knows, maybe he's just floating around in there or something. It's just a feeling. As for Neville, i'm just afraid that it's a possiblilty, no matter how unlikely.

Wormtail will definetly play a big part in this. I'm sure of it.

I hope everyone dies because the Earth is demolished for a hyperspatial express route. Just to piss everyone off.

I'm starting to like the "rocks fell, everyone died" idea more.

I've read the "leaked" section that has been made available online. It does, indeed, appear to be for real. My bad, I guess.

Ok, boys and girls, my sources say that I may very well quite possibly not making any promises but very open to the idea that we have a complete, legit copy online.

I'll let you know.

Ok, I'm fairly confident this is real. Either than or somebody has far, FAR too much time on their hands.

I've read the "leaked" section that has been made available online. It does, indeed, appear to be for real. My bad, I guess.

The supposedly fake epilogue is part of the book I've might possibly in the occurrence of my daily life acquired. So either someone wrote a 800 page fake, or it's real.

The supposedly fake epilogue is part of the book I've might possibly in the occurrence of my daily life acquired. So either someone wrote a 800 page fake, or it's real.

It's real. The epilogue is just not very good. The rest of the book is pretty good, but the experience is ruined by the terrible glare that made it next to impossible to read.

It's real. The epilogue is just not very good. The rest of the book is pretty good, but the experience is ruined by the terrible glare that made it next to impossible to read.

Lol. Yeah, the epilogue's corny. It's too... you know, fairytale. Everyone marries everyone and has kids and lives happily ever after.

...

Why did I bother spoilering that? It's already posted here.

Anyway, even the end starts to read like a generic epic. Actually, kinda like a video game.

Lol. Yeah, the epilogue's corny. It's too... you know, fairytale. Everyone marries everyone and has kids and lives happily ever after.

Yup. But, after all, it's a kid's book. Kid's books do have to have happy endings.

Yup. But, after all, it's a kid's book. Kid's books do have to have happy endings.

Even then, it's like she threw away years of darkening and horror/thriller aspects and reverted back to the early books. I dunno, just seems weird.

Even then, it's like she threw away years of darkening and horror/thriller aspects and reverted back to the early books. I dunno, just seems weird.

Given that the Epilogue was apparently written at the same time as book One, that isn't a huge suprise.

Given that the Epilogue was apparently written at the same time as book One, that isn't a huge suprise.

Fair enough. But bloody hell. Didn't seem like there was enough build up to what happens in the epilogue. You know?

Kinda like if Tolkien wrote a LotR epilogue, and it said "And Frodo married Galadriel." You'd just say "What? Where the fuck did that come from?"

So, wait...there really is a leaked copy of the book on the interwebtubes?

So, wait...there really is a leaked copy of the book on the interwebtubes?

Actually, by now it's on everyone's hard drives :D

I CBF reading it. As long as I know how it all ends.

Actually, by now it's on everyone's hard drives :D

I CBF reading it. As long as I know how it all ends.

...

How odd. I searched and found photocopied pages, but no standard document.

Hmm...maybe I'll take the time to transcribe it so people don't have to deal with the glare...

...

How odd. I searched and found photocopied pages, but no standard document.

Hmm...maybe I'll take the time to transcribe it so people don't have to deal with the glare...

What I've got is actual PHOTOGRAPHS of the book. Complete with crap like "About the author", "About the illustrator", and the dedication.

What I've got is actual PHOTOGRAPHS of the book. Complete with crap like "About the author", "About the illustrator", and the dedication.

...
Yes, that's what I meant. By standard document I was referring to a text version rather than just the pictures.

...
Yes, that's what I meant. By standard document I was referring to a text version rather than just the pictures.

There is a 200 something PDF fake floating around. Which is fake enough. But when photographs, very, very realistic photographs, turn up, it has to be real.

PM me if you'd like.

There is a 200 something PDF fake floating around. Which is fake enough. But when photographs, very, very realistic photographs, turn up, it has to be real.

PM me if you'd like.
No need, because I have them myself. I just figured that such a document should exist because reading photographs--especially ones with this kind of glare--is not my cup of tea.

...

But then I plan on purchasing a copy of the book anyway whether I have such a document or not...I'm just impatient and a bit starved for entertainment.

No need, because I have them myself. I just figured that such a document should exist because reading photographs--especially ones with this kind of glare--is not my cup of tea.

Oh, yeah, that would be nice. But photos are the only real way to prove that it's leaked.

Actually, I don't get any glare on my photos; somebody went to the effort to invert the colours on all of them, so the text is clear visible, if not a little blurry.

Oh, yeah, that would be nice. But photos are the only real way to prove that it's leaked.

Actually, I don't get any glare on my photos; somebody went to the effort to invert the colours on all of them, so the text is clear visible, if not a little blurry.

...

Link me in a telegram.

Done comrade.

Done comrade.

Thank you again. Took me a minute to get the bloody thing to work...stupid website was insisting on displaying in Japanese and my computer either misplaced or deleted its East Asian Language files somehow at some point and I've never been able to get them restored.

Apparently, the publisher's entire security and anti-leak system is collapsing like a house of cards: leaks all over the 'Net, some guy in Maryland received the book four days early.

It's official: the cats out of the bag, and the shit's hit the fan.

Luckily for them, most of their customers don't understand how to obtain leaked copies of the book. But now I feel bad, and I rarely feel bad about pirating.

...

Yep, definitely purchasing a copy of the book. Gotta support them even if I contributed to the demise of the anti-leak system.

After reading the ending, the only part I ever care about, the book itself looks like it will be promising but will turn into an absurd "let's end the series with a bang!" game that turns anticlimactic quickly.

The publisher still hasn't admitted the leak, although they've called it "convincing". I'd be very surprised if it was a fake. Very, very surprised.

And yeah, my mom's got her copy pre-ordered, so... yeah.

I got a thrill out of the whole leak thing. I dunno. It's like, the publisher spent ten million pounds to keep it secret and secure until the release, and cracking it wide open is kinda exhilarating, in a weird way.

EDIT: This isn't to say I was actually involved in the original leak, I wasn't. But you could probably link me through online acquaintances to the original leaker, in a "Six Degrees of Separation" sort of way.

Saturday is going to suck for me. :(

For those that don't know, I deliver mail. Since the final Harry Potter book will be out on Saturday, I'm estimating that at least 1/2 of the parcels I'll have to deliver will be coming from places like Amazon.com, Waldenbooks, etc.

Stupid pre-orders.

Someone telegram me a link, please.

Someone telegram me a link, please.
Who need a link when you know where to find pirates. You know, where they keep their ships..

Who need a link when you know where to find pirates. You know, where they keep their ships..

Wow. The thing is actually quite readable...
Still, should contribute to the "Make Rowling rich fund".

So, did Harry die?

So, did Harry die?

Readability reffered to the quality of the scan. Not the actual plot ;)

Readability reffered to the quality of the scan. Not the actual plot ;)

Damnit.

As you may or may not have learned a copy of the new Harry Potter book was leaked to the internet. I have a copy and I must say that this may be the best of the series. Not because its a good story but because so many people die and it will no doubt send many and emo fan-fag into pseudo-suicidal rage over the loss of their favorite characters and the trampling of their many sick fantasies.

The following are the best moments from this droning waste of stationery:

lol dead people spoilers:
Burbage dies on pg. 12
Hedwig dies on pg. 56
Mad-Eye dies on pg. 78
Scrimgeour dies on pg. 159
Wormtail dies on pg. 471
Dobby dies on pg. 476
Snape dies on pg. 658
Fred Weasley dies on pg. 637
Harry gets fucked up by Voldemort on pg. 704
He comes back to life on pg. 724
Tonks, Lupin, and Colin Creevy have their deaths confirmed on pg. 743
Voldemort kills himself on pg. 743

19 years after the events in the book:
Ron has married Hermione, their two children are named Rose and Hugo
Harry has married Ginny, their three children are named Lily, James, and Albus Severus.
Draco Malfoy has a son named Scorpius
The epilogue shows all of the children boarding the train for Hogwarts together.

The final lines of the book are:
"The scar had not pained Harry for nineteen years. All was well."
"NOT MY DAUGHTER YOU BITCH!" : Molly Weasley, to Bellatrix Lestrange, P. 736
Also: Draco Malfoy is balding by the end of the book.

Have fun using this list of spoilers to piss off potter fans lining up at the bookstore, though don't be suprised if quite a few already have had the scalding pot of beans hurled on their face.

Tell me, have you participated in the popularzation of that fake Leroy Jenkins video on youtube with the spoilers in it? You should, you'll get a lot of people that way too.

I'm quite mad Harry didn't stay dead though. Oh well.

I love you!

Oh, yeah, that would be nice. But photos are the only real way to prove that it's leaked.

Actually, I don't get any glare on my photos; somebody went to the effort to invert the colours on all of them, so the text is clear visible, if not a little blurry.

If you still have it, can i have a linky? Pretty plz?

1) That isn't true. JKR said that only two main characters die, and Harry and/or Voldemort. I take that as possibly 4 deaths, and your list is far off.

Edit: You apparently got the fanfic version of DH, because people cannot come back to life in the Harry Potter world.

Harry and Voldemort join forces with Al Gore to stop global warming.

Harry and Voldemort join forces with Al Gore to stop global warming.

He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is crusading against the inconvenient truth! I love it!

He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is crusading against the inconvenient truth! I love it!

hahaha! nice!

If you still have it, can i have a linky? Pretty plz?

To quote the above, who needs a link when you know where Pirates weigh anchor and bury their treasure.

He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is crusading against the inconvenient truth! I love it!

Reduce that carbon footprint or scary snake face man will come and fuck you up.

1) That isn't true. JKR said that only two main characters die, and Harry and/or Voldemort. I take that as possibly 4 deaths, and your list is far off.

Edit: You apparently got the fanfic version of DH, because people cannot come back to life in the Harry Potter world.

There is a rumor that the leaked one is a fake, made by J.K. Rowling even.

Edit: You apparently got the fanfic version of DH, because people cannot come back to life in the Harry Potter world.
Depends if he was actually killed..

There is a rumor that the leaked one is a fake, made by J.K. Rowling even.
That's alot of work to go through, making an entire new book and all...

Reduce that carbon footprint or scary snake face man will come and fuck you up.

the death eaters will come for you if you don't recycle!

That's alot of work to go through, making an entire new book and all...

The biggest evidence towards it is how much it sucks.

1) That isn't true. JKR said that only two main characters die, and Harry and/or Voldemort. I take that as possibly 4 deaths, and your list is far off.

Edit: You apparently got the fanfic version of DH, because people cannot come back to life in the Harry Potter world.

It's real. I've read it. It isn't the Melindaleo Fic that was being bandied about earlier. I was skeptical, but it is real.

the death eaters will come for you if you don't recycle!

The dark mark appears over the homes of people who throw away things that could be recycled.

Reduce that carbon footprint or scary snake face man will come and fuck you up.

"Why didn't you buy that Prius?" Voldemort hissed, swooping down on his hapless SUV-owning victim.

"B-but.. I like my SUV!"

"NONSENSE!" voldemort roared. "You're destroying the environment, you filthy Muggle! You're releasing carbon into the atmosphere! You see, my Death Eaters and I didn't fight for Wizard supremacy and blood purity and all that rubbish, we fought you Muggles because you're destroying the environment!"

"But... But Tom..." Harry interrupted. "I thought your massacres and terrorism were for immortality."

"At first they were, Harry," Voldemort said. "at first they were. But then you stood in the way of that, your mom gave her life for you, blah blah blah, and then when I came back I decided to help the environment so I could live and not have to worry about polluting my lungs. I don't want to live for an eternity with asthma and global warming and pollution and all that, you know."

"Oh..."

"So it's still for immortality?" Harry asked.

"Err... let's get back to torturing this guy. CRUCIO!"

"Hey!" Harry intervened. "We can't torture a Muggle!"

"Yeah.. well.. AVADA KEDAVRA!" Harry fell dead. The man screamed.

"So... trade your SUV in for a hybrid. Now. Save the planet or face the dire consequences!"

"But the SUV was cheaper! You stupid tree-hugging hippie, I don't have a ton of money, you know!"

"AVADA KEDAVRA!"

[/fanfic]

Yes, thank you for not marking your thread with a spoilers tag. I hate it when people spoil stuff for others for the sake of harming them. Yes, I spoiled myself...I read the whole thing. I can, in fact, confirm every detail he mentioned.

What he glosses over is the rest of the book...even knowing these details, it's still a fun read. Best in the series, as he said, for different reasons. 'Course, it's still a children's book, but hey, as children's books go, it's a damned good one.

I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure. *nod*

I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure. *nod*

Seriously, how are you not ruler of the planet yet?

I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure. *nod*

Ah shit...game over man...game over!

Seriously, how are you not ruler of the planet yet?

Well, there are these photos....

*shifts uncomfortably*

So, did Harry die?

Yes and no.

Well, there are these photos....

*shifts uncomfortably*

I've seen them. I'd still vote for you.


Actually, I get get you the pervert vote if some more photos are "leaked".
>.>
<.<

can some one e-mail me the link quicky so I can take my e-mail down before someone spams it?
insane.carpet.stealer@gmail.com

Nah, turns out he's getting more sex than all of us. Which is bullshit, 'cause he's a nerd! You're a nerd, Potter!

And?
Obviously you have NOT been around Sci-Fi/Fantasy/Anime conventions or Ren Fests. All supposedly nerdy, lots of sex to go around.

And?
Obviously you have NOT been around Sci-Fi/Fantasy/Anime conventions or Ren Fests. All supposedly nerdy, lots of sex to go around.

my husband is pretty nerdy.....he seems to be satisfied. (although I am a bit of a geek myself.....)

There is a rumor that the leaked one is a fake, made by J.K. Rowling even.

I don't think JKR made two books (jesus!) however, I am confident that both copies are fake, considering that in the one leaked in this thread were 1. incompatible with the rest of the Harry Potter series, and 2. out-of-character for *certain* people, and 3. not something JKR would likely write.

I'm treating all the "spoilers" in this thread a s fake until the weekend, when I KNOW for sure if they are fake.

Honestly, people, can't you wait a few days, or must you spoil everything, even when your "spoilers" came from some site off the internet?

I don't think JKR made two books (jesus!) however, I am confident that both copies are fake, considering that in the one leaked in this thread were 1. incompatible with the rest of the Harry Potter series, and 2. out-of-character for *certain* people, and 3. not something JKR would likely write.

I'm treating all the "spoilers" in this thread a s fake until the weekend, when I KNOW for sure if they are fake.

Honestly, people, can't you wait a few days, or must you spoil everything, even when your "spoilers" came from some site off the internet?

I haven't and probably never will read any of the books, but frankly, if half the stuff quoted in this thread is actually in the book, then Rowling's no better a writer than Paolini.

I don't think JKR made two books (jesus!) however, I am confident that both copies are fake, considering that in the one leaked in this thread were 1. incompatible with the rest of the Harry Potter series, and 2. out-of-character for *certain* people, and 3. not something JKR would likely write.

I'm treating all the "spoilers" in this thread a s fake until the weekend, when I KNOW for sure if they are fake.

Honestly, people, can't you wait a few days, or must you spoil everything, even when your "spoilers" came from some site off the internet?

I've read it. It's real. The epilogue is just not well written becaus it was written over a decade ago.

I don't think JKR made two books (jesus!) however, I am confident that both copies are fake, considering that in the one leaked in this thread were 1. incompatible with the rest of the Harry Potter series, and 2. out-of-character for *certain* people, and 3. not something JKR would likely write.

I'm treating all the "spoilers" in this thread a s fake until the weekend, when I KNOW for sure if they are fake.

Honestly, people, can't you wait a few days, or must you spoil everything, even when your "spoilers" came from some site off the internet?

Ok, listen. This is not some Word file being passed around. It is photographs, actual photos, of EVERY SINGLE PAGE IN THE BOOK.

Ok, listen. This is not some Word file being passed around. It is photographs, actual photos, of EVERY SINGLE PAGE IN THE BOOK.

And it isn't like she doesn't have a history of leaking false titles, plot points, etc...

At any rate, everyone will know, according to this thread, within the first 15 pages if the leak is real. Though the idea that, even with all her precautions, she still couldn't keep the final book under raps is entertaining.

I've read it. It's real. The epilogue is just not well written becaus it was written over a decade ago.

I still don't see why that makes any sense...either she knew every plot detail from the beginning--which is bullshit, because no one plans something out to that level of detail--or else she just edited it slightly to fit with the way things went, also bullshit because it implies she wouldn't want to make it more decent.

No, she just wanted to write a happy ending, which I'm fine with. It is, after all, in the end, a children's book.

Ok, $50 says that if this is a fake, it's better than the real thing.

I still don't see why that makes any sense...either she knew every plot detail from the beginning--which is bullshit, because no one plans something out to that level of detail--or else she just edited it slightly to fit with the way things went, also bullshit because it implies she wouldn't want to make it more decent.

No, she just wanted to write a happy ending, which I'm fine with. It is, after all, in the end, a children's book.

She says she wrote it years ago. I'm willing to beleive her.

Sorry for the double post, but:

It's real (http://www.baltimoresun.com/entertainment/booksmags/bal-2potter0718,0,2741335.story?coll=bal-mdpolitics-utility). The Baltimore Sun confirms that the details from the leaked book are what was in their copy.

She says she wrote it years ago. I'm willing to beleive her.

Oh really.

...

Well, okay then.

Oh really.

...

Well, okay then.

It has been editted since then, though. It used to end with "scar" apparently, but some edits changed.

Sorry for the double post, but:

It's real (http://www.baltimoresun.com/entertainment/booksmags/bal-2potter0718,0,2741335.story?coll=bal-mdpolitics-utility). The Baltimore Sun confirms that the details from the leaked book are what was in their copy.

Yep. SPOILERS MASS:

The thing about the three Deathly Hallows gave it off.

So the best that Rowling can come up with is Voldie offs himself?

Granted I don't know the details, but that seems incredibly weak.

Yeah, a tad lame.

So the best that Rowling can come up with is Voldie offs himself?

Granted I don't know the details, but that seems incredibly weak.

It has been editted since then, though. It used to end with "scar" apparently, but some edits changed.

Aye. Wasn't all that fantastic, though...I'm not sure Harry would name a kid Albus Severus even taking into account everything that happened...

Telesha: After a whole complicated series of events. It's not as if it's something without build-up.

...

Okay, still a bit weak, but it's not as weak as it first appears.

Aye. Wasn't all that fantastic, though...I'm not sure Harry would name a kid Albus Severus even taking into account everything that happened...

Harry: I know. Let's name him Albus Severus.
Ginny: Fuck off, we're giving him a normal name.

Aye. Wasn't all that fantastic, though...I'm not sure Harry would name a kid Albus Severus even taking into account everything that happened...

Telesha: After a whole complicated series of events. It's not as if it's something without build-up.

...

Okay, still a bit weak, but it's not as weak as it first appears.

Oh, I'm sure I'm being overly critical. As I said, I don't know the details and really have no interest in finding them. But, hey, if it works it works. If I can live with what happens in the first 20 pages of Eldest I can handle listening to my fangirl wife complain :D

Ok, So two major newspapers have reviewed it, and their reviews match the leak.

How can it possibly be a fake now?

Ok, So two major newspapers have reviewed it, and their reviews match the leak.

How can it possibly be a fake now?

A grand conspiracy involving the Illuminati, Raptor Jesus, the Jews and secretly headed by the Space Pope?

A grand conspiracy involving the Illuminati, Raptor Jesus, the Jews and secretly headed by the Space Pope?

You forgot the Librul Media. You can't do without them.

You forgot the Librul Media. You can't do without them.

Oh yes of course, that's a subsidiary of Raptor Jesus Co.

It's virtually been confirmed now. NY Times took the liberty of matching their review copy to the leak.