NationStates Jolt Archive

Every time I look at the singles ads, either on the Internet or computer, I always skip over the single mothers. It's not that I don't think they may be great women, or that I wouldn't fall for them. It's just that well I don't want children, now I know that I've said this in the past, and hell I'm still thinking about getting a Vasectomy so that I would be able to make love and not have to worry about reproducing. However, it's only recently that I've realized why I don't want children. It's not that I don't think babies are cute, or that they wouldn't be fun, it's just that well, I cannot handle the responsibility. Raising a child is a lifetime commitment and a huge responsibility and honestly I really, honestly do not think I am up for that task.

Now I know there are others who don't want children, so tell us what is your reason for not having children?

Just a gut feeling in my case. Unless you're in your thirties though (or thereabouts), I wouldn't go closing the door on having kids just yet. ;) If you're still dead-set against it then, by all means go and get neutered. :p

Just a gut feeling in my case. Unless you're in your thirties though (or thereabouts), I wouldn't go closing the door on having kids just yet. ;) If you're still dead-set against it then, by all means go and get neutered. :p

I doubt I'll be changing, I mean hell I can't even stand it when my nephew cries. Usually I just hand him off to someone else and just leave the room.

I doubt I'll be changing, I mean hell I can't even stand it when my nephew cries. Usually I just hand him off to someone else and just leave the room.

You might be surprised - I've seen some people do some amazing 180s on the issue. And no, not because they forgot contraception. :p

you mean you actualy want someone to go in, and snip? Wouldn't it be a lotcheaper and easier to use extra thick condoms?

While I haven't yet ruled out the possibility of having kids, my current line of thinking is that I don't want one.

It has nothing to do with my own ability (or lack thereof) to raise a child...I simply think we have enough people on this ball of mud without me adding one (or more) to the mix.

In the end I don't think it'll be my call anyway. :p

I really don't have an opinion at this point. Plenty of life left to think about it.

While I haven't yet ruled out the possibility of having kids, my current line of thinking is that I don't want one.

It has nothing to do with my own ability (or lack thereof) to raise a child...I simply think we have enough people on this ball of mud without me adding one (or more) to the mix.

In the end I don't think it'll be my call anyway. :p

There's a lot of people, sure, but most of them are Chinese. You *are* in favor of diversity, aren't you? :p

you mean you actualy want someone to go in, and snip? Wouldn't it be a lotcheaper and easier to use extra thick condoms?

I can't say from experience, but I think the standard ones are effective enough. :p

There's a lot of people, sure, but most of them are Chinese. You *are* in favor of diversity, aren't you? :p

Neither in favor, nor opposed.

I couldn't care less about the ethnic makeup of the global, national, or local population...now, or generations from now.

One big "meh" from me. :p

Neither in favor, nor opposed.

I couldn't care less about the ethnic makeup of the global, national, or local population...now, or generations from now.

One big "meh" from me. :p

Yeah, that's basically my feeling too. You won't hear me say it in public though! :p

I had a child when I was twenty and a vasectomy when I was twenty-one. I don't regret the decision, but I'm 38 now and getting it reversed in October. There's a lot of life ahead of you is all I'm saying.

Survival instincts says I should give my progeny a better chance than others.

Single mothers = an affront to my genetic legacy, even the hot ones.

This is me making a joke by the way.

My reasons for not wanting kids are...

1. during baby sitting for JROTC, I had a little blonde kid jumped on my back and bite me, which was really horrible and weird.

2. other reasons, I observe my peers, noticed that they're messed up, stupid, ungrateful, and useless

3. Having children will force me to put my life on hold and I will no longer be able to pursue a career or life of my own, and I won' be able to maintain my career because I am a woman, and most likely I will be forced to take care of the child.

I just never have wanted them.

I didn't like kids when I was one and still don't.

I'd be a terrible parent.

I'd pass on a few genes that may or may not mean they would be disabled.

There are enough children in the world without me producing a couple.

why do people actually want kids? What for? to look after them when they are old? because babies are cute? I just don't get it.

My reasons for not wanting kids are...

1. during baby sitting for JROTC, I had a little blonde kid jumped on my back and bite me, which was really horrible and weird.

2. other reasons, I observe my peers, noticed that they're messed up, stupid, ungrateful, and useless

3. Having children will force me to put my life on hold and I will no longer be able to pursue a career or life of my own, and I won' be able to maintain my career because I am a woman, and most likely I will be forced to take care of the child.

Babysitting is a part of ROTC? :p Really?

I was dead set against children when I got married. The world is an awful place, and its really selfish to have kids and bring them into a world I think is going to go straight to hell in my own lifetime.

That being said, I knew my wife wanted children but she accepted that with me we would never have kids. Eventually, I changed my mind, not for me, but for her. Call me sappy but I love my wife.

I too thought, "oh man, how can I ever raise kids? I'm a freakin' bum" But, once we had my daughter it all changed. Those things that seemed important or that I wanted to make sure I kept up on, didn't matter anymore. I had a responsibility, a duty to this new little life, this little person. I was gonna be damned if I was gonna fuck that up.

Frankly, you may be exactly the type of person that should have kids, you understand how big a deal it really is. You are not some person that will view their kids as their personal property or as some ridiculous "requirement" of a successful marriage or family.

while I still worry about the world and future in store for my daughter, I wouldn't change my decision for anything. She is wonderful, the most important thing in my life. I always used to think people were full of crap when they said you changed how you look at things, how you feel and what is important. I have to say, it really did change me. Anybody that it doesn't change, that aren't totally dedicated to their children (and I don't mean spoil them rotten, you DO have to say NO and lay down the law sometimes) do us the favor and give your kids up to parents that don't suck.

Best thing I have ever done or will ever do.

Every time I look at the singles ads, either on the Internet or computer, I always skip over the single mothers. It's not that I don't think they may be great women, or that I wouldn't fall for them. It's just that well I don't want children, now I know that I've said this in the past, and hell I'm still thinking about getting a Vasectomy so that I would be able to make love and not have to worry about reproducing. However, it's only recently that I've realized why I don't want children. It's not that I don't think babies are cute, or that they wouldn't be fun, it's just that well, I cannot handle the responsibility. Raising a child is a lifetime commitment and a huge responsibility and honestly I really, honestly do not think I am up for that task.

Now I know there are others who don't want children, so tell us what is your reason for not having children?

I don't want children because they're noisy, they smell, they're messy, they're loud, and they basically steal the lives of the parents.

I'd adopt. And none of that "I want a baby and make my own" or whatever the reason is there's a baby waiting list. Get me a 7-year-old that's potty trained and doesn't spit up any more.

Or so I say now, we'll see.

I'd adopt. And none of that "I want a baby and make my own" or whatever the reason is there's a baby waiting list. Get me a 7-year-old that's potty trained and doesn't spit up any more.

Or so I say now, we'll see.

That's a lot of waiting and paperwork, though, I think. ;) Might be cheaper, but I hear it's a real hassle with the forms and notices and stuff.

I'd be a decent parent, but not popular with the others. Teachers and fellow parents would take a dim view if my child asked me "What's sex?" (and that WOULD happen if I had hatchlings) and I explained it.

As Alan Grant famously said in Jurassic Park, they're noisy, messy, expensive, and they smell. :p

I don't want children because...they basically steal the lives of the parents.

For a while. Then...

why do people actually want kids? What for? to look after them when they are old?

So it works out in the end...at least for the parents.

As Alan Grant famously said in Jurassic Park, they're noisy, messy, expensive, and they smell. :p

Heh. Was that Goldblum or the other guy (can't ever remember his name)? :p

Heh. Was that Goldblum or the other guy (can't ever remember his name)? :p

The other guy.

The other guy.

That guy's great. I liked him in the one where he was on the spaceship and goes nuts. :)

That guy's great. I liked him in the one where he was on the spaceship and goes nuts. :)

The original or the sequel?

That's a lot of waiting and paperwork, though, I think. ;) Might be cheaper, but I hear it's a real hassle with the forms and notices and stuff.

Are the forms anything like changing a diaper?

"The Other Guy" would be Sam Neil

The spaceship movie is Event Horizon (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0119081/)...one of my favorites, and Neil does indeed kick ass in that film.

"You know nothing. "Hell" is only a word. The reality is much, much worse."

Pure badassness. :p

Are the forms anything like changing a diaper?

Probably worse. :p

...so tell us what is your reason for not having children?

Growing up in a home where a parent provided day care services. Imagine having a constant stream of 2 to 4 year olds running around your house three or four at a time...for two decades. Children are so completely overrated. Innocent and pure my backside.

To any parents out there:

Raise your OWN spawn, damn it!

Thank you. :)

"The Other Guy" would be Sam Neil

The spaceship movie is Event Horizon (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0119081/)...one of my favorites, and Neil does indeed kick ass in that film.

"You know nothing. "Hell" is only a word. The reality is much, much worse."

Pure badassness. :p

Yeah, that's the one! :p Taught me to pay attention in Latin class, that's for sure. Well, no, not really. :p

"The Other Guy" would be Sam Neil

The spaceship movie is Event Horizon (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0119081/)...one of my favorites, and Neil does indeed kick ass in that film.

"You know nothing. "Hell" is only a word. The reality is much, much worse."

Pure badassness. :p
Yeah, well, Jeff Goldblum was The Fly, so, pwnd.

Yeah, well, Jeff Goldblum was The Fly, so, pwnd.

I liked him as Capt. Hennesey.

Yeah, I know no one saw that movie. :p

I liked him as Capt. Hennesey.

Yeah, I know no one saw that movie. :p

Which?

Which?

Exactly. ;)


But seriously, http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0362270/ (It's a safe site, I'm pretty sure)

I think about 4 people saw it. :p

Exactly. ;)


But seriously, http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0362270/ (It's a safe site, I'm pretty sure)

I think about 4 people saw it. :p

I'm not one of those 4, as you may have surmised. ;):p

I liked him as Capt. Hennesey.

Yeah, I know no one saw that movie. :p

That movie was awesome! :)

If you see it on DVD, be sure to check out the deleted scenes. "Klaus on Fire" is absolutely hysterical!

...*leaves to avoid more offtopicness* :p

I'm not one of those 4, as you may have surmised. ;):p

Yeah. :p

Really, it wasn't a 'great' movie, but it was fun and I like Bill Murray. It was more of an 'atmosphere' comedy for people who watched PBS in the 70s and 80s. :p

Yeah, that's the one! :p Taught me to pay attention in Latin class, that's for sure. Well, no, not really. :p

"Liberate tutamae ex infernis!" *holds eyeballs in hands* :D

Oh and on topic, I don't want kids either. :)

That movie was awesome! :)

If you see it on DVD, be sure to check out the deleted scenes. "Klaus on Fire" is absolutely hysterical!

...*leaves to avoid more offtopicness* :p

I heard it was smug and tried too hard to be weird.

That movie was awesome! :)

If you see it on DVD, be sure to check out the deleted scenes. "Klaus on Fire" is absolutely hysterical!

...*leaves to avoid more offtopicness* :p

Sweet. :p I agree, though: back on topic. Although the movie is pretty relevant to the topic, if you think about it - the whole theme of childhood and parenthood and everything. Unless I'm way, way, off in my interpretation. :p

Yes, the kids are noisy, smelly and expensive. The same can be said about cars. Both provide certain rewards, if one chooses to think of it that way.
When my daughter was born, I didn't notice any change in myself. The world however has changed radically. There is much more to love and care about in it now.

I personally doubt that I will have children, although I am not saying anything definite in the mean time

I just never have wanted them.

I didn't like kids when I was one and still don't.

I'd be a terrible parent.

There are enough children in the world without me producing a couple.

QFT!

Raising a child is a lifetime commitment and a huge responsibility and honestly I really, honestly do not think I am up for that task.

It's very much your right and your motivation is relevant. A lot better than the "oh, I just never considered it" bunch.
Don't feel bad about it.

Now I know there are others who don't want children, so tell us what is your reason for not having children?They're icky.

Well, mostly when they're really young though. I might consider a single mom if her children are past the needing someone to take them to the bathroom stage.

I'm selfish and I want to concentrate on myself.

If for some odd reason I ever woke up desperate for a kid, I'll adopt. But I'll probably end up with a puppy or kitten instead -- the emotional stress is a lot less. ;)

(keep in mind, 10 months a year I have close and constant contact with 400 teens other people have had.)

It was my wife that first raised the question of kids in our household. I was happy enough without any but didn't think that we would NEVER have kids - just not now. Anyway, pregnancy followed and we found ourselves with a small human. I remember emailing a friend and saying "Aarrgh the responsibility! How am I supposed to give advice and pass on wisdom?!" and he, who already had a kid, replied "It's not that difficult really. At the moment all I need to say with regard to wisdom and advice is 'don't run around with that sheet over your head'."

Nature guides you into it slowly :) all you really need is patience, love and lots of cuddles.
That small human just swam by herself today for the first time and I feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

It is your choice after all, but ECC is correct. Having kids changes you, it changes your outlook on life, it is a marvelous thing.

Now I know there are others who don't want children, so tell us what is your reason for not having children?
For me, it's not about having reasons to NOT have children, it's about lacking reasons to have children.

Making babies is not the default for me. I believe you should have children only if you have both the active desire to have them and also the practical means to support them.

Right now, I have neither.

The main reason I don't want to have children is that I'm asexual. This doesn't stop some people who really want to have children, but in my case I couldn't stand having sex in order to have a child, but I don't think I'd want to be alone to raise a child. Maybe I could adopt someday, but I don't know.

The main reason I don't want to have children is that I'm asexual. This doesn't stop some people who really want to have children, but in my case I couldn't stand having sex in order to have a child, but I don't think I'd want to be alone to raise a child. Maybe I could adopt someday, but I don't know.

You're asexual?

Asexual what?

Mmmpphhhahehehe.

You're asexual?

Asexual what?

Mmmpphhhahehehe.

It means that I'm not sexually attracted to anyone. I made a thread about it.

I must have children, otherwise my all-powerful genes won't be able to rule the world in the future.

It means that I'm not sexually attracted to anyone. I made a thread about it.

Damn me, I was jokeing, making a joke, havin' a laff! :eek:

Damn me, I was jokeing, making a joke, havin' a laff! :eek:

She should be alert, the world needs lerts.

The world needs children as well and any decent person will soon understand on having a child that it's not about being ready, or being able to support, or making the right decisions - on having a child you just do, it takes extraordinary circumstances for a parent to do not.

I want one of them critters.

She should be alert, the world needs lerts.

The world needs children as well and any decent person will soon understand on having a child that it's not about being ready, or being able to support, or making the right decisions - on having a child you just do, it takes extraordinary circumstances for a parent to do not.

I want one of them critters.

Yeah I agree, I always reply to these 'don't have kids until you can afford it' mob, that if we done that no kids would be born except the super rich.

Kids cost loads of money, and I mean loads of the stuff. The best time to have kids is quite simply when you want them, when the urge hits you.

I can't sell you one of mine, but I may loan one out, for cash!

Yeah I agree, I always reply to these 'don't have kids until you can afford it' mob, that if we done that no kids would be born except the super rich.

Kids cost loads of money, and I mean loads of the stuff. The best time to have kids is quite simply when you want them, when the urge hits you.

I can't sell you one of mine, but I may loan one out, for cash!

Probably explains why farmers have so many kids so often - put them to work, and they cover some or maybe even most of the expense. :p

Probably explains why farmers have so many kids so often - put them to work, and they cover some or maybe even most of the expense. :p

Yeah that or, have you seen countryside TV?

Yeah that or, have you seen countryside TV?

I'm not sure what that is. ;) But I know a few people from families of 14 or 16 - crazy numbers. All farmers. Well, except one, but the old man in that case was a game warden and zookeeper, which is kinda close.

I hated kids when I got pregnant, I totally and completely thought I would suck as a parent (some days I still think I totally suck as a parent) but, it's done and what are you going to do now?

I like my kids, they are very interesting little people, I don't feel like they have stolen my life or that my "life is on hold" (whatever the hell that means anyway), I can tell you that the responsibility is often crushing, not in the amount of work (which there is a lot but I have always been a hard worker) but in the realization that if someone is going to screw them up, it's nearly always the parents, and the subsequent realization that statistically I am probably going to screw them up more than my husband ever will. I am with my kids nearly 24/7 with a few breaks for them to pursue interests outside what I can provide (the oldest goes to community college, the youngest to art class) and while most people (parents and non-parents alike) would cringe at the thought, I really couldn't think of anyone better to hang out with........of course my kids are for the most part smarter than many of the adults I know.

If you for any reason, think you don't want kids, or can't handle the responsibility by all means abstain. Be nice to the parents around you though, it's a hard job, and please show a little respect to the kids, growing up isn't easy, it's even harder when some people hate you just because of who you are.

I'm not sure what that is. ;) But I know a few people from families of 14 or 16 - crazy numbers. All farmers. Well, except one, but the old man in that case was a game warden and zookeeper, which is kinda close.

http://www.duggarfamily.com/

http://www.duggarfamily.com/

I've heard of them. :p Interesting thing is, the people I've met from huge families have never been religious types - huge families, but without the "be fruitful and multiply" motivation, just sort of something the parents were into.

I've heard of them. :p Interesting thing is, the people I've met from huge families have never been religious types - huge families, but without the "be fruitful and multiply" motivation, just sort of something the parents were into.

there are a lot of homeschooling families in my area that are the "quiver full" type who think you must have as many kids as God will give you, and they look down on me and are snarky because I decided to stop at 2. I would love to have 40 kids or whatever, but I can't provide for 40 kids, and my body apparently doesn't like being pregnant.....I get really really sick, like near death sick.

Once our kids get older we might adopt.....but just because we will still be very young when the kids are old enough to be independent. (well, and also because we want another kid or two, but we want to adopt older kids and your kids are supposed to be older than the kids you adopt, so to balance it out our kids need to be much older than they are now)

there are a lot of homeschooling families in my area that are the "quiver full" type who think you must have as many kids as God will give you, and they look down on me and are snarky because I decided to stop at 2. I would love to have 40 kids or whatever, but I can't provide for 40 kids, and my body apparently doesn't like being pregnant.....I get really really sick, like near death sick.

Once our kids get older we might adopt.....but just because we will still be very young when the kids are old enough to be independent. (well, and also because we want another kid or two, but we want to adopt older kids and your kids are supposed to be older than the kids you adopt, so to balance it out our kids need to be much older than they are now)

That's cool. :) I've known a bunch of great people who have adopted (and was adopted myself, coincidentally :p) - it's a great thing, even if, from what I hear, the legal end is rather frustrating.

As for finances, I can see financial *stability* being important, but I can't help but think some people who have posted earlier might be overestimating the importance of wealth in raising kids. Some of the greatest parents and kids I know do things on a budget, and do perfectly well. :)

http://www.duggarfamily.com/

Ok, so I'll never have THAT many kids... maybe a reasonable two, or three, but not--What was that, 16?

I think having children would be a very enjoyable thing (for the most part), but, like others, I don't feel I'm up to the responsibility it entails. I don't think I'm good around children at the moment, but then again, I wouldn't say I'm good around people in general.

While there is a certain appeal in spawning a child who is required to do your bidding, such as chores you hate, dishes, mowing the lawn, et cetera, and a chance to one up my own father and be a good parent. Nah, little bastards are entirely too much trouble.

That's the great thing about being gay, you never accidentally end up with a kid.

While there is a certain appeal in spawning a child who is required to do your bidding, such as chores you hate, dishes, mowing the lawn, et cetera, and a chance to one up my own father and be a good parent. Nah, little bastards are entirely too much trouble.

That's the great thing about being gay, you never accidentally end up with a kid.

So long as you never donate any genetic material to one of those banks - courts seem to want to make you a parent in those cases nowadays. :p Sounds crazy, but it has happened.

Every time I look at the singles ads, either on the Internet or computer, I always skip over the single mothers. It's not that I don't think they may be great women, or that I wouldn't fall for them. It's just that well I don't want children,

(quote snipped, so to speak)

I would never in a million years try to convince someone that they should have kids. I have children and love them beyond words, and would do it over again given the choice. I didn't always think I wanted them -- I waited until I did and am a far better parent for having come to that decision over time. I think not wanting kids should be the *default* opinion and people should arrive at a decision to want them. Unfortunately, society hasn’t gotten to that point yet. I’m all behind a person’s decision to have an elective sterilization to prevent unwanted pregnancy. In fact, if someone is even remotely on the fence, I'm the first to scream "don't do it unless you are 1000% certain!" I'll never try to talk someone into it.

However I will say this about your post: not every single mother is looking for a guy to be a parent to her kids. Many of those kids have perfectly great fathers who love their kids and are very involved in their lives; for one reason or another the spouse thing was the broken part of the family.

My parents divorced and each became involved with someone else. Under no circumstances was either of their significant others a parent substitute for me. I had a mom, and I had a dad -- I didn’t need or desire and would have rebelled vehemently against step-anythings. Their relationship with their sig. others was their thing alone. If there was an issue that involved me, it was also between them to navigate how to handle it within their relationship.

Now, not wanting to be in a house with kids is another reason to pass over them, to be sure. I just wanted to dispel the myth that all single parents are out to snag another “parent” for their kids, that’s all.

i'm not against children but its the idea of actually squeezing one out that bothers me.

i'm not against children but its the idea of actually squeezing one out that bothers me.

Yeah I can't say I know much about that. Although, I was there for the birth of both my kids, but man it was fun squeezing them in!

Yeah I can't say I know much about that. Although, I was there for the birth of both my kids, but man it was fun squeezing them in!

I might advise not mentioning that around the kids - I think I would die if I were in their shoes. :p

I might advise not mentioning that around the kids - I think I would die if I were in their shoes. :p

Bwahahah it's far too late. They are already largely immune to perantual embaresment.

yeah parents and sex.

we all know they never have it. except maybe the once or twice when they concieved us or our siblings.

even then i'm sure they didn't enjoy it:D

As a parent, I would like to point out that there is no rational reason to have children, and that I would do it all over again if I could.

i'm not against children but its the idea of actually squeezing one out that bothers me.

Hey, if the doorway is too narrow, the docs can always let 'em out a window. That happened to me twice, and while I wouldn't recommend it as a first choice, it's good to have as an option.

Every time I look at the singles ads, either on the Internet or computer, I always skip over the single mothers. It's not that I don't think they may be great women, or that I wouldn't fall for them. It's just that well I don't want children, now I know that I've said this in the past, and hell I'm still thinking about getting a Vasectomy so that I would be able to make love and not have to worry about reproducing. However, it's only recently that I've realized why I don't want children. It's not that I don't think babies are cute, or that they wouldn't be fun, it's just that well, I cannot handle the responsibility. Raising a child is a lifetime commitment and a huge responsibility and honestly I really, honestly do not think I am up for that task.

Now I know there are others who don't want children, so tell us what is your reason for not having children?

You must be young. Because usually when people turn older and realize they havent acomplished shit in their life, nor ever will, they start thinking about having kids, because having kids is "special" (even through any idiot can have them).

Hey, if the doorway is too narrow, the docs can always let 'em out a window. That happened to me twice, and while I wouldn't recommend it as a first choice, it's good to have as an option.

Now thats a fantastic turn of phrase!

1) I don't like children
2) My attention span on any one project is 1 week, 2 at most
3) I value my independance
4) I don't like children
5) I firmly support the idea that children need a healthy fear of their parents and elders, a fear that needs to be beaten into them, a concept that has been all but outlawed.
6) I cried getting lazer hair removal, there's no fucking way I'm pushing out a kid.
7) I hate children

You must be young. Because usually when people turn older and realize they havent acomplished shit in their life, nor ever will, they start thinking about having kids, because having kids is "special" (even through any idiot can have them).

Very pessimistic view of life you have there. I want to have kids when I know where my future is going i.e. when i've qualified, am in a stable relationship, etc and not because I feel my life hasn't produced any accomplishments

You must be young. Because usually when people turn older and realize they havent acomplished shit in their life, nor ever will, they start thinking about having kids, because having kids is "special" (even through any idiot can have them).

mmmmmmmmmmmmmm

well I'm the older side of 40, have a good job, enough money in the bank to take month long holidays.

I have also accomplished less materialistic things such as saving someone's life.

So maybe because I have accomplished something I'm not about to change my mind and start producing kids.

Every time I look at the singles ads, either on the Internet or computer, I always skip over the single mothers. It's not that I don't think they may be great women, or that I wouldn't fall for them. It's just that well I don't want children, now I know that I've said this in the past, and hell I'm still thinking about getting a Vasectomy so that I would be able to make love and not have to worry about reproducing. However, it's only recently that I've realized why I don't want children. It's not that I don't think babies are cute, or that they wouldn't be fun, it's just that well, I cannot handle the responsibility. Raising a child is a lifetime commitment and a huge responsibility and honestly I really, honestly do not think I am up for that task.

Now I know there are others who don't want children, so tell us what is your reason for not having children?

Same thing. I wouldn't be able to do it.

Having children isn't about having fun, nor is it about having cute babies. It isn't about being able to create something you know will love you unconditionally. Having children is about leaving something behind when you die. It's about imitating in the creative love of the Lord God, and producing new life.

Momento mori quia pulvis es et in pulvem reverteris.

So maybe because I have accomplished something I'm not about to change my mind and start producing kids.


But when your parents are dead, when your friends are dying, and you are stuck in a nursing home...who will visit you? Who will quench your lonliness? If you hit the rocks, who will take care of you?

If you are hungry, who will feed you?
If you are sick or in prison, who will come to visit you?
If you are thirsty, who will give you to drink?
If you naked, who will clothe you?

But when your parents are dead, when your friends are dying, and you are stuck in a nursing home...who will visit you? Who will quench your lonliness? If you hit the rocks, who will take care of you?

If you are hungry, who will feed you?
If you are sick or in prison, who will come to visit you?
If you are thirsty, who will give you to drink?
If you naked, who will clothe you?

Jesus?

But when your parents are dead, when your friends are dying, and you are stuck in a nursing home...who will visit you? Who will quench your lonliness? If you hit the rocks, who will take care of you?

If you are hungry, who will feed you?
If you are sick or in prison, who will come to visit you?
If you are thirsty, who will give you to drink?
If you naked, who will clothe you?

The good Samaritan himself?

Y'all had better hope to hell that when you are old and decrepid, there are really good Christians around. If there aren't, you'll be screwed.

I'll hope for really good people instead. Increase my odds and all that

Jesus?

Y'all had better hope to hell that when you are old and decrepid, there are really good Christians around. If there aren't, you'll be screwed.

I don't place any hope in hell, it sounds like a horrible place.

Oh burn!!!



I apologise for that ..... kind of

Y'all had better hope to hell that when you are old and decrepid, there are really good Christians around. If there aren't, you'll be screwed.

I don't place any hope in hell, it sounds like a horrible place.

Just answer me this:

When you die, who will mourn, if you don't have children?

Why does it matter to me who mourns?

And how about friends instead

I don't place any hope in hell, it sounds like a horrible place.

Just answer me this:

When you die, who will mourn, if you don't have children?

Just answer me this:

When you die, who will mourn, if you don't have children?

I have children and there are still days that I think nobody would mourn my death....mostly the morning after the day when I was really bitchy to everyone for no reason.

Am I the only one who finds the idea of "you have kids so they can take care of you when you're old" incredibly repugnant?

If you don't like children, don't have them.

I like children.

I have had two, one from each of my previous wives, who decided they didn't want children.

I have one I inherited from my current wife.

I have two I inherited from her sister, who became a heroin addict and couldn't handle children, much less her own life.

So that's five - 7,9,10,12,14 - two boys, three girls.

And I had a vasectomy after my second child...

Kids can get into your life even if you weren't planning on them.

I have children and there are still days that I think nobody would mourn my death....mostly the morning after the day when I was really bitchy to everyone for no reason.

Comrade, you are taking care of your children. Bitchy or not, you are supporting them, providing for them, etc. My own parents are sons of bitches, and I never fail to tell them so.

And I doubt I'll tell them this, but I still love them, and I'd be really at a loss if they died.

Am I the only one who finds the idea of "you have kids so they can take care of you when you're old" incredibly repugnant?

nope. Probably though, I don't think I should have to take care of my mom, I do, but I don't like it, and I intend to quit soon.

And how about friends instead

Your friends won't be around forever, man.

nope. Probably though, I don't think I should have to take care of my mom, I do, but I don't like it, and I intend to quit soon.

What if your mother would have said the same thing?

What if your mother would have said the same thing?

she basically did, by the age of 3 I was roaming around the house on my own fixing my own food because she was passed out. I am not really sure how I lived to make it to 3......to tell you the truth.

I made my first box of mac and cheese when I was 4 years old.

Your friends won't be around forever, man.

It would be a bit arrogant to think I will outlive them

Why does blood matter so much to you?

she basically did, by the age of 3 I was roaming around the house on my own fixing my own food because she was passed out. I am not really sure how I lived to make it to 3......to tell you the truth.

I made my first box of mac and cheese when I was 4 years old.

I'm sorry to hear that. Nonetheless, she is your mother.

I'm sorry to hear that. Nonetheless, she is your mother.

fat lot of good that does her.

I'm sorry to hear that. Nonetheless, she is your mother.

who cares?

I don't talk to most of my extended family because they are evil. My mom is a lazy horrible person, I don't much see any point in continuing a relationship with her.

http://rous.redbarn.org/objectivism/Writing/PeterVoss/Children.html <-- you should read that.

I don't much see any point in continuing a relationship with her.

For good or for ill, I'm sure you turned out fine.

You owe your mother, for you exist. And if you enjoy your existence, then you should be thankful to your mother.

For good or for ill, I'm sure you turned out fine.

You owe your mother, for you exist. And if you enjoy your existence, then you should be thankful to your mother.

That doesn't mean you have to take her shit.

For good or for ill, I'm sure you turned out fine.

You owe your mother, for you exist. And if you enjoy your existence, then you should be thankful to your mother.

How Machiavellian...

For good or for ill, I'm sure you turned out fine.

You owe your mother, for you exist. And if you enjoy your existence, then you should be thankful to your mother.

I turned out fine because I took responsibility for myself......and it was a sucky path to get to that realization.

I owe that woman nothing, just like my kids owe me nothing, they didn't ask to be born, they have no choice as to who their parent is.

But when your parents are dead, when your friends are dying, and you are stuck in a nursing home...who will visit you? Who will quench your lonliness? If you hit the rocks, who will take care of you?

If you are hungry, who will feed you?
If you are sick or in prison, who will come to visit you?
If you are thirsty, who will give you to drink?
If you naked, who will clothe you?

Well I'm not sure if you have noticed but this is not the Victorian era. The chances of me outliving my parents are not as high as you might imagine. I already employ a carer so that I can live independently and not in a nursing home. I take responsibility for my life.

My carer is a professional who does things the way I want, not the way he thinks is best.

I've seen elderly people looked after by their grown up children. They do not respect them, they do not treat them professionally. They are too involved emotionally to even understand care standards let alone display them.

Having children just so they will look after you has to be the most selfish reason. It's almost like a form of slavery "I gave birth to you so now you have to do everything I tell you to"

I'm selfish and I want to concentrate on myself.

If for some odd reason I ever woke up desperate for a kid, I'll adopt. But I'll probably end up with a puppy or kitten instead -- the emotional stress is a lot less. ;)

(keep in mind, 10 months a year I have close and constant contact with 400 teens other people have had.)

Yup. That'll do it.

She should be alert, the world needs lerts.

The world needs children as well and any decent person will soon understand on having a child that it's not about being ready, or being able to support, or making the right decisions - on having a child you just do, it takes extraordinary circumstances for a parent to do not.

I want one of them critters.

:confused: Were you talking about me?

If you are then I don't understand what you're trying to say to me. I'm just not going to have sex so that I can have kids, as I hope to never have sex. I'm only 17 now anyway. If I want to adopt someday, I will, but chances are that I won't because I'll be alone.

Kids terrify me.

Because they're sniveling brats who smell of old cheese and spoilt milk, and you can never have a decent conversation with one.

Me: "So, Johnny, after four years of consecutive existence on this planet, what do you think about the growing strength of the Chinese economy?"

Four-year-old: "I wanna cookie."

Because they're sniveling brats who smell of old cheese and spoilt milk, and you can never have a decent conversation with one.

Me: "So, Johnny, after four years of consecutive existence on this planet, what do you think about the growing strength of the Chinese economy?"

Four-year-old: "I wanna cookie."

that doesn't sound like my 4 year old at all.

Me: "So squishy, what do you think about W commuting that guy's sentence?"

Four-year-old: "everyday I think more and more that the president is a bad guy, maybe we should fire him"

that doesn't sound like my 4 year old at all.

Me: "So squishy, what do you think about W commuting that guy's sentence?"

Four-year-old: "everyday I think more and more that the president is a bad guy, maybe we should fire him"

She's only saying that because she knows that's what you want to hear.

that doesn't sound like my 4 year old at all.

Me: "So squishy, what do you think about W commuting that guy's sentence?"

Four-year-old: "everyday I think more and more that the president is a bad guy, maybe we should fire him"
Ddin't somebody once leave a recording of Bush's voice on your answering machine, and your 4 year old got scared and started crying?

Ddin't somebody once leave a recording of Bush's voice on your answering machine, and your 4 year old got scared and started crying?

she woke up and was crying yeah. She kept saying "DELETE DELETE DELETE" because she didn't want me to play it again.

when she was about 18 months-2 years he came through town and we went to see him and he smirked at her, she has been afraid of him ever since.

she woke up and was crying yeah. She kept saying "DELETE DELETE DELETE" because she didn't want me to play it again.

when she was about 18 months-2 years he came through town and we went to see him and he smirked at her, she has been afraid of him ever since.

Aw... poor kid. Then again if Bush's voice came up on my answering machine I'd be alittle freaked out too.

So long as you never donate any genetic material to one of those banks - courts seem to want to make you a parent in those cases nowadays. :p Sounds crazy, but it has happened.

There's nothing wrong in making people responsible for their genetic legacy.

But when your parents are dead, when your friends are dying, and you are stuck in a nursing home...who will visit you? Who will quench your lonliness? If you hit the rocks, who will take care of you?

If you are hungry, who will feed you?
If you are sick or in prison, who will come to visit you?
If you are thirsty, who will give you to drink?
If you naked, who will clothe you?

It sure as hell won't be kids. Look at how many adult children DON'T give a crap about their parents in homes.

Have kids because you want them, not because you want a free nurse later in life.

But when your parents are dead, when your friends are dying, and you are stuck in a nursing home...who will visit you? Who will quench your lonliness? If you hit the rocks, who will take care of you?

If you are hungry, who will feed you?
If you are sick or in prison, who will come to visit you?
If you are thirsty, who will give you to drink?
If you naked, who will clothe you?
If those are your concerns, then I think you'd be better served making piles of money so you can pay people to care for you in your old age. It's certainly more reliable than making babies in the hopes that they will 1) still be around to take care of you, 2) will be financially/physically able to take care of you, and 3) will be inclined to bother to take care of you.

We need Indians on this thread.

I'm sure their outlook would be much different.

I think it's good to be self-aware enough to be that concerned about your ability to handle the responsibility. Ironically, that suggests that you're taking it seriously enough that you CAN handle it.

My oldest son was born when I was 18 years old. I was scared but decided that one way or another, I'd take care of him to the best of my ability. I figured, heck, I'm a reasonably intelligent guy, I love my son, people with less intelligence and love than I have been able fathers, so I just gave it my best.

Today, he's 14 and gets all 'A's in school, is well on his way to earning Eagle Scout, has a very deep and stable spiritual life, and rides beside me into battle on the Warhammer Table. (Not that I can take sole credit for that, of course, but I do my part :) )

What's not to like? :p