NationStates Jolt Archive

The New New Great British Imperial Party
Official Manifesto of the Emparh

http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e283/Slippery__Jim/UnionJack.jpg

Welcome to the New New Great British Imperial Party, good chap!
Your very presence should help stay the bloody awful weather we always seem to having in dear old Blighty, wot!

This manifesto will attempt to detail you of our goals, aims and objectives, as well as lay down the rules which all lawful and loyal citizens of the Emparh should follow!
Perhaps once you have read it you will agree with us that NationStates would benefit immeasurably from joining the ever-growing list of the Emparh's dominions, wotwot!

In summary:


The tea industry is to be subsidised by NationStates General.
Coffee shall be banned in public areas, though it may be enjoyed in the comfort of one's own home. We're not dictators, wot!
It will be compulsory to wear a top hat and carry an umbrella around at all times.
Received Pronunciation will be the official mode of speech of the Emparh and the entire population will be taught to speak it correctly.
American English will be removed from the face of the Earth. Microsoft Word shall be updated thusly and Bill Gates shall be incarcerated in the deepest dungeons and have all his earthly possessions, including money, requisitioned by the British Government for daring to spread the travesty that is American English. (We don't care if American English is closer to Old English than British English. It's not our fault that Americans can't keep up with the times. (If British English be found to be closer, then the following argument is to be used: we don't care if you decide to spit on tradition.))
The English language shall be placed under the official protection of the law from such things as intentional deviations from the Queen's English, the travesty that is 'leet speak' and other such abominable behaviours and modes of speech. Anyone disobeying this, unless outside of the Anglosphere, shall be flogged.
The 'United Kingdom' shall be defined in the following way: an English success is 'English'. An English failure is 'Henman'. A Henman success is a bloody miracle! A Scottish success is 'British.' A Scottish failure is 'Scottish' (this also applies to Wales and those pesky Northern Irish, wot!).
Instead of warnings, forum bans or deletions, the primary method of enforcing NS rules will be to send in a gunboat. Or HMS Victory (the famous one).
Anyone from a former part of the British Empire is to be referred to as a "damned colonial".
Anyone not from a former part of the British Empire or Britain is to be referred to as a "damned foreigner".
From this day forth newsreaders are banned from walking around the studio grinning when announcing thousands of deaths.
All food dishes must be served with a double portion of chips.
The statue of the pregnant woman in Trafalgar Square shall be replaced with one of Terry Wogan and another of Lord Philosopy.
The word "Empire" must be pronounced "Emparh" with reference to the British Empire.
It is compulsory to moan about the "bloody weather" at least once per day, or at any time when noticing the bloody weather. This shall be the case even when the bloody weather is not, in fact, in such an awful condition as to merit the word 'bloody'.
An official moratorium is to be put in place upon the phrases "Well done" and "Congratulations". Instead, the phrase "Jolly good show!" must be used.
Watching (and waving a Union Flag during) the Last Night of the Proms is compulsory.
The manufacture of tweed jackets, bowler hats, top hats and umbrellas is to be subsidised. The manufacture of three-piece suits is also to be subsidised.
NationStates shall invest vast sums of money into expanding the Royal Navy.
Celebrating the battles of Agincourt, Trafalgar and Waterloo is compulsorary on pain of removal of tea rations and, well, pain.
NationStates is to apply for Commonwealth membership and recognise the Queen as head of state.


Now, go and join. For Emparh!

Most Honourable Members of Her Majesty's Empire*:
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Ilaer, CBE, OBE, MBE, Party President
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Steely Glint, CBE, OBE, MBE, Secretary of State for the Foreign Office
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Forsakia, CBE, OBE, MBE, Minister for the Bloody Weather and Minister for Sheep
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Barronia, CBE, OBE, MBE, Minister for Administering Her Majesty's English
The Right Honourable Most Respected Lord Sir Admiral Professor Philosopy, CBE, OBE, MBE, Former Party President and Owner of a Jolly Large House in the Country Somewhere
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Hydesland, CBE, MBE, OBE, Knight of the New BBC
The Right Honourable Lord Sir The blessed Chris, CBE, OBE, MBE, Viceroy of the East India Trading Company, Minister of Tea and, Crumpet Comptroller General
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Imperial isa, CBE, OBE, MBE, Duke of Australia and Commanding Field Marshal of Her Majesty's British Armies
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Cruxium, CBE, OBE, MBE, Minister for Queueing & Administration
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Don Jubbly, CBE, OBE, MBE, Minister for Propaganda
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Hamberry, CBE, OBE, MBE, Marshal of the Royal Air Force and Minister Responsible of Top Hats
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Fleckenstein, CBE, OBE, MBE, Admiral of the Fleet, Minister of Monocles and Minister of the As-Yet-Unexpected-And-Unimplemented British Inquistion.

*This thread assumes that no former members are automatically members.
Any former members who wish to join must simply state their wish and they can be reinstated with their old titles.

For Glory and Emparh! For the Queen! For Britannia!

The former threads:

The New British Choose Your Imperial Pogo Stick Wisely Party (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=517747)

The New British Imperial Party (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=499781)

Hunting down the first...
Edit: Gotcha! (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=443192)

I wish to rejoin with my former title of secretary of state for foreign affairs if I may.

Ha ha! Fantastic. I must declare however that I do partake in numbers 14 and 16, respectively. I also say "damned" a lot and spent approximately 20 minutes trying to force Word 2007 to change the default to British English. Damned newfangled contraption.

I should also like to join the party, if you'll have me.

Lord Ilaer, old boy, you have my support as always, wot wot! May we repeat the glorious success of our previous campaign!

Huzzah for the Emparh!

I say, would be much obliged old bean if you could reinstate me, tally ho and so on and so forth.

I wish to rejoin with my former title of secretary of state for foreign affairs if I may.

Done. :)

Ha ha! Fantastic. I must declare however that I do partake in numbers 14 and 16, respectively. I also say "damned" a lot and spent approximately 20 minutes trying to force Word 2007 to change the default to British English. Damned newfangled contraption.

I should also like to join the party, if you'll have me.

But of course, good sir! Just state what position in Her Majesty's Government you wish, wot!

Lord Ilaer, old boy, you have my support as always, wot wot! May we repeat the glorious success of our previous campaign!

Huzzah for the Emparh!

Huzzah! Huzzah! Shall I reinstate you, then, Lord Sah?

I say, would be much obliged old bean if you could reinstate me, tally ho and so on and so forth.

Also done. :)

But of course, good sir! Just state what position in Her Majesty's Government you wish, wot!

Jolly good show! Do you happen to have a Minister for Administering Her Majesty's English? And if you would, I'd prefer to be known as just "Barronia".

Huzzah for the Emparh! God Save the Queen!

Done. :)


My god sah but that was quick. *tips top hat*

One is here, ready to do all that is required of me to defeat these damn colonials and foreigners in the NSG elections.

Jolly good show! Do you happen to have a Minister for Administering Her Majesty's English? And if you would, I'd prefer to be known as just "Barronia".

Huzzah for the Emparh! God Save the Queen!

It occurs to me that I will be saying 'done' a lot.
Oh well.

Huzzah for Emparh!

My god sah but that was quick. *tips top hat*

One is here, ready to do all that is required of me to defeat these damn colonials and foreigners in the NSG elections.

I thank you, good sah!
*tips own top hat in return*

For the moment I think we just wait...

Huzzah! Huzzah! Shall I reinstate you, then, Lord Sah?

I shall be a member of NBIP until the day I croak it, wot wot! Give me a glorious title and a manor house in the country, good sah, and I shall be your obedient servant!

Huzzah!

Can I ask the right honorable Ilaer to give a pure bred Brit and lover of the empah an honorable title in the nngip, wot wot?

I shall be a member of NBIP until the day I croak it, wot wot! Give me a glorious title and a manor house in the country, good sah, and I shall be your obedient servant!

Huzzah!

Do you want to be co-president, old chap?
Please do. You're much more popular on here than me... :)

Can I ask the right honorable Ilaer to give a pure bred Brit and lover of the empah an honorable title in the nngip, wot wot?

Of course, good sah! Do you wish to specify a title?

Do you want to be co-president, old chap?
Please do. You're much more popular on here than me... :)

Co-President? Why, good sah this is England; we can only have one person at the top, wot wot! I am most flattered by your comments, and am more than happy to take on an honorary title, but you most be strong, good sah! You are British: your diet of tea and scones has made you a fearsome beast, wot!

Now, let us build a new armada of dreadnoughts, and invade the nation of some tinpot dictator! For Emparh, Her Majesty, and the promotion of tea! Huzzah!

Of course, good sah! Do you wish to specify a title?

Oh blast, that is a toughie. How about you grant me a lordship, as well as knighthood also with an OBE, CBE and an MBE, (unless those are reserved). I also request, sir Ilaer that I be head of the new nationalised BBC, where there will be daily praise of the great empah!

Co-President? Why, good sah this is England; we can only have one person at the top, wot wot! I am most flattered by your comments, and am more than happy to take on an honorary title, but you most be strong, good sah! You are British: your diet of tea and scones has made you a fearsome beast, wot!

Now, let us build a new armada of dreadnoughts, and invade the nation of some tinpot dictator! For Emparh, Her Majesty, and the promotion of tea! Huzzah!

Very well, good sah! I shall be prepared to be a blithering idiot, but a strong blithering idiot nonetheless, sah!
Well, it's been the tradition for three electoral terms now in the UK, for the leader to be a blithering idiot...

Oh blast, that is a toughie. How about you grant me a lordship, as well as knighthood also with an OBE, CBE and an MBE, (unless those are reserved). I also request, sir Ilaer that I be head of the new nationalised BBC, where there will be daily praise of the great empah!

Done, sah!

Done, sah!

Manythanks good sah!

No problem, good chap!

Oh, and Pan-Arab Barronia: I was right in assuming that you were female, right?

Now, let us build a new armada of dreadnoughts, and invade the nation of some tinpot dictator! For Emparh, Her Majesty, and the promotion of tea! Huzzah!

Good sahs! I would like to propose myself as Admiral of the Fleet, First Sea Lord of your great and glorious tinpot-deposing navy!

This of course would entail abandoning my post as NSDSP leader, saving if the Emparh would allow me to continue my "duties", wot?

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/34/England_Expects_Signal.png/480px-England_Expects_Signal.png

*puts on bicorn hat and uniform*

No problem, good chap!

Oh, and Pan-Arab Barronia: I was right in assuming that you were female, right?

'Fraid not old bean.

Oh, millenium hand and shrimp...

lol, ... imperialists.



punks and pirates FTW!!! :D

YAARRRRRRRR!!

:p

*plunders*

i don't know all that work and getting the Tea lady (joke between me and TBD) in the old party i just don't know

i don't know all that work and getting the Tea lady (joke between me and TBD) in the old party i just don't know

*gives you the tea lady*

Don't worry, chaps; I'll buy the party a new one...

lol, ... imperialists.



punks and pirates FTW!!! :D

YAARRRRRRRR!!

:p

*plunders*

See how the cowardly pirates are so scared of losing the hopefully upcoming elections that they are forced to attack a legitimate political party! Shame on you!
:)

*hunts for battleship images*

Edit: *finds*
Fire!

http://www.timegun.org/dreadnought.jpg

See how the cowardly pirates are so scared of losing the hopefully upcoming elections that they are forced to attack a legitimate political party! Shame on you!
:)

*hunts for battleship images*
*preempts*

http://www.brainydays.co.uk/images/Orchard%20Toys%20Pirate%20Ship.jpg

*pwns*

:p

*gives you the tea lady*

Don't worry, chaps; I'll buy the party a new one...

be in Russia with her

Because it just wouldn't be the same without yours truly!

I humbly request my old title of Viceroy of the East India Trading Company, along with the new title of minister of tea, and crumpet comptroller general.

be in Russia with her

That reminds me... Do you wish to have your position reinstated, good sah?

Because it just wouldn't be the same without yours truly!

I humbly request my old title of Viceroy of the East India Trading Company, along with the new title of minister of tea, and crumpet comptroller general.

Done, sah!

That reminds me... Do you wish to have your position reinstated, good sah?

Duke and Commander of the Army

Oh, millenium hand and shrimp...

Worry not good sah, a regular occurence wot wot.

If it weren't for work I would be quite up for another go at the Bally French wot wot!!

If it weren't for work I would be quite up for another go at the Bally French wot wot!!



Porc-chiens anglais ! Aller bouillir vos fonds, fils d'une personne idiote !

Porc-chiens anglais ! Aller bouillir vos fonds, fils d'une personne idiote !

Begone, you fiend! *fixes bayonet to hunting rifle*

Charge!

Begone, you fiend! *fixes bayonet to hunting rifle*

Charge!

Retraite!

*Drops rifle and flees, in the true French military tradition*

The New New Great British Imperial Party
Official Manifesto of the Emparh

http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e283/Slippery__Jim/UnionJack.jpg

Welcome to the New New Great British Imperial Party, good chap!
Your very presence should help stay the bloody awful weather we always seem to having in dear old Blighty, wot!

This manifesto will attempt to detail you of our goals, aims and objectives, as well as lay down the rules which all lawful and loyal citizens of the Emparh should follow!
Perhaps once you have read it you will agree with us that NationStates would benefit immeasurably from joining the ever-growing list of the Emparh's dominions, wotwot!

In summary:


The tea industry is to be subsidised by NationStates General.
Coffee shall be banned in public areas, though it may be enjoyed in the comfort of one's own home. We're not dictators, wot!
It will be compulsory to wear a top hat and carry an umbrella around at all times.
Received Pronunciation will be the official mode of speech of the Emparh and the entire population will be taught to speak it correctly.
American English will be removed from the face of the Earth. Microsoft Word shall be updated thusly and Bill Gates shall be incarcerated in the deepest dungeons and have all his earthly possessions, including money, requisitioned by the British Government for daring to spread the travesty that is American English. (We don't care if American English is closer to Old English than British English. It's not our fault that Americans can't keep up with the times. (If British English be found to be closer, then the following argument is to be used: we don't care if you decide to spit on tradition.))
The English language shall be placed under the official protection of the law from such things as intentional deviations from the Queen's English, the travesty that is 'leet speak' and other such abominable behaviours and modes of speech.
The 'United Kingdom' shall be defined in the following way: an English success is 'English'. An English failure is 'Henman'. A Scottish success is 'British.' A Scottish failure is 'Scottish' (this also applies to Wales and those pesky Northern Irish, wot!).
Instead of warnings, forum bans or deletions, the primary method of enforcing NS rules will be to send in a gunboat. Or HMS Victory (the famous one).
Anyone from a former part of the British Empire is to be referred to as a "damned colonial".
Anyone not from a former part of the British Empire or Britain is to be referred to as a "damned foreigner".
From this day forth newsreaders are banned from walking around the studio grinning when announcing thousands of deaths.
All food dishes must be served with a double portion of chips.
The statue of the pregnant woman in Trafalgar Square shall be replaced with one of Terry Wogan and another of Lord Philosopy.
The word "Empire" must be pronounced "Emparh" with reference to the British Empire.
It is compulsory to moan about the "bloody weather" at least once per day, or at any time when noticing the bloody weather. This shall be the case even when the bloody weather is not, in fact, in such an awful condition as to merit the word 'bloody'.
An official moratorium is to be put in place upon the phrases "Well done" and "Congratulations". Instead, the phrase "Jolly good show!" must be used.
Watching (and waving a Union Flag during) the Last Night of the Proms is compulsory.
The manufacture of tweed jackets, bowler hats, top hats and umbrellas is to be subsidised.
NationStates shall invest vast sums of money into expanding the Royal Navy.
Celebrating the battles of Agincourt, Trafalgar and Waterloo is compulsorary on pain of removal of tea rations and, well, pain.
NationStates is to apply for Commonwealth membership and recognise the Queen as head of state.


Now, go and join. For Emparh!

Most Honourable Members of Her Majesty's Empire*:
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Ilaer, CBE, OBE, MBE, Party President
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Steely Glint, CBE, OBE, MBE, Secretary of State for the Foreign Office
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Forsakia, CBE, OBE, MBE, Minister for the Bloody Weather and Minister for Sheep
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Barronia, CBE, OBE, MBE, Minister for Administering Her Majesty's English
The Right Honourable Most Respected Lord Sir Admiral Professor Philosopy, CBE, OBE, MBE, Former Party President and Owner of a Jolly Large House in the Country Somewhere
The Right Honourable Lord Sir Hydesland, CBE, MBE, OBE, Knight of the New BBC
The Right Honourable Lord Sir The blessed Chris, CBE, OBE, MBE, Viceroy of the East India Trading Company, Minister of Tea and, Crumpet Comptroller General

*This thread assumes that no former members are automatically members.
Any former members who wish to join must simply state their wish and they can be reinstated with their old titles.

For Glory and Emparh! For the Queen! For Britannia!

My parents came to America from India. Does that make me a damned colonial or a damned colonial's son?

Duke and Commander of the Army

Of course, good sir!

Worry not good sah, a regular occurence wot wot.

Thank you...

If it weren't for work I would be quite up for another go at the Bally French wot wot!!

:(
Who cares about work when there's Emparh-building to be done?!

Retraite!

*Drops rifle and flees, in the true French military tradition*

Reminds me of the old joke about French tanks having six gears; five reverse and one forward.
The forward one is only used when they're attacked from behind. :)

My parents came to America from India. Does that make me a damned colonial or a damned colonial's son?

Um... Both, sah!

Porc-chiens anglais ! Aller bouillir vos fonds, fils d'une personne idiote !

Rhubarb to you too Sah! ;)

Who cares about work when there's Emparh-building to be done?!



Sadly the building does not pay the rent :(

Sadly the building does not pay the rent :(

Sadly so...

Um... Both, sah!

I guessed as much.

I guessed as much.

Don't you forget young damned colonial chap, the USA was once part of the beloved emparh too! So you would be a colonial whatever the case young sah Johnny!

Being a bit new here, I'm wondering wot the point of a party is. Can someone fill me in?

Good sahs! I would like to propose myself as Admiral of the Fleet, First Sea Lord of your great and glorious tinpot-deposing navy!

This of course would entail abandoning my post as NSDSP leader, saving if the Emparh would allow me to continue my "duties", wot?

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/34/England_Expects_Signal.png/480px-England_Expects_Signal.png

*puts on bicorn hat and uniform*

As it seems I've been ignored here, I will take my navy-leading services somewhere else. . .

Being a bit new here, I'm wondering wot the point of a party is. Can someone fill me in?

To fight the Bally French and teach those cowardly Pirates in the Car...

oh god...shoot me!

As it seems I've been ignored here, I will take my navy-leading services somewhere else. . .

Argh...
I didn't even see your post, sah!

Come back, sah!

@Hamberry:
To participate in the NSG Parliament and generally have a laugh.

Ya'll spelt honor wrong.

Ya'll spelt honor wrong.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Honour

away, damned colonial!

away, damned colonial!

as long as it's him and not me

Ya'll spelt honor wrong.

*shoots the American*

Wait a moment... It's Unithu, isn't it...

*shoots the American again to make sure that he doesn't write random erotica in binary again*

*shoots the American again to make sure that he doesn't write random erotica in binary again*

o.O

Sometimes I'm glad I don't have the free time to sit on NSG I used to.

o.O

Sometimes I'm glad I don't have the free time to sit on NSG I used to.

It was in the Spam forum quite a while ago...

Oh I say, what a spiffing good thread. About time a party arose that incorporates both my love of being English, and my distaste for the French! Provided you are willing, I would rather be interested in assuming the position of Minister for Queueing & Administration. Might I also propose an addition to the manifesto, that all suits must be three-piece.

For the Queen, For the Emparh, For Britannia!

*Patriotic flag wave*

My apologies, I cannot grace you with machine code erotica, as I have lost my leetkey extension and I'm too lazy to get it again.

My apologies, I cannot grace you with machine code erotica, as I have lost my leetkey extension and I'm too lazy to get it again.

I have an extension in my pants, if you need it ;)

I'm sorry, i'm so sorry, i'm not gay (assuming you're a guy) I just couldn't resist....

..

SAH

I have an extension in my pants, if you need it ;)

I'm sorry, i'm so sorry, i'm not gay (assuming you're a guy) I just couldn't resist....

..

SAH

That's my new favorite one liner, just so you know.

Oh I say, what a spiffing good thread. About time a party arose that incorporates both my love of being English, and my distaste for the French! Provided you are willing, I would rather be interested in assuming the position of Minister for Queueing & Administration. Might I also propose an addition to the manifesto, that all suits must be three-piece.

For the Queen, For the Emparh, For Britannia!

*Patriotic flag wave*

Done, sah!
The manufacture of three-piece suits is to be subsidised, to allow for people of different tastes to wear what they want.

My apologies, I cannot grace you with machine code erotica, as I have lost my leetkey extension and I'm too lazy to get it again.

For which we all thank you.

HUZZAH!

\

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v427/vonbek/rourke.gif

May I join this most glorious party? I would make a rather excellent Minister for Propaganda, I dare say.

@Hamberry:
To participate in the NSG Parliament and generally have a laugh.



I say, sah, then I'd certainly love to sign up. Marshal of the Royal Air Force and Minister Responsible for Top-Hats would be a spiffing title if I could.

Huzzah! It seems your party Lord Sir Ilaer is gathering pace! And all, so far, with a decent grasp of Her Majesty's English!

Except for that damned colonial. Honour, I say! Honour!

May I propose in future that all bastardisational spellings of our glorious mother tongue be made a flogging offence, or at least cause one to be made the subject of severe ridicule, severe I say. In persistent offences, it could be considered an act of war.

Huzzah! It seems your party Lord Sir Ilaer is gathering pace! And all, so far, with a decent grasp of Her Majesty's English!

Except for that damned colonial. Honour, I say! Honour!

We cannot stand idly by while our beautiful language is being disgraced, those bloody colonials must learn how to spell correctly.

I propose that all party members bold the letter 'u' whenever they type honour.

HUZZAH!

\

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v427/vonbek/rourke.gif

Huzzah!

May I join this most glorious party? I would make a rather excellent Minister for Propaganda, I dare say.

But of course, good sah!

I say, sah, then I'd certainly love to sign up. Marshal of the Royal Air Force and Minister Responsible for Top-Hats would be a spiffing title if I could.

Also but of course, good sah, wotwot!

May I propose in future that all bastardisational spellings of our glorious mother tongue be made a flogging offence, or at least cause one to be made the subject of severe ridicule, severe I say. In persistent offences, it could be considered an act of war.

Flogging? Hmmm...
An intriguing idea...

Huzzah! It seems your party Lord Sir Ilaer is gathering pace! And all, so far, with a decent grasp of Her Majesty's English!

Except for that damned colonial. Honour, I say! Honour!

I wonder whether you ever read the sort of original thread by the Lord Sah Philosopy?
'Twas a brilliant thread, and certainly more active than this one...

We cannot stand idly by while our beautiful language is being disgraced, those bloody colonials must learn how to spell correctly.

I propose that all party members bold the letter 'u' whenever they type honour.

What an excellent idea!
It could get a little tedious, though. Hmmm.
We need a program to do it for us...

I wonder whether you ever read the sort of original thread by the Lord Sah Philosopy?
'Twas a brilliant thread, and certainly more active than this one...

It seems to me that we need to recruit more people into our party. There must be more people willing to serve Queen and country, wot!

What an excellent idea!
It could get a little tedious, though. Hmmm.
We need a program to do it for us...

Surely it won't be that tedious, honour is not a word most people use frequently.

May I revive this thread to remind members that they should be supporting that bastion of British sportsmanship Mr Tim Henman esq in his traditional five-set first round match against the damn Spaniard Moya. 2 sets all, 10-9 up in the final set.:)

Success. In an event comparable to the defeat of the Spanish Armada, Henman defeateed the dastardly spaniard by the amazing tactic of having his opponent double fault on Henman's seventh match point. Huzzah.

Success. In an event comparable to the defeat of the Spanish Armada, Henman defeateed the dastardly spaniard by the amazing tactic of having his opponent double fault on Henman's seventh match point. Huzzah.

Huzzah! More glory for the Emparh! :)


I suggest an amendment to rule number 6:

The 'United Kingdom' shall be defined in the following way: an English success is 'English'. An English failure is 'Henman'. A Henman success is a bloody miracle! A Scottish success is 'British.' A Scottish failure is 'Scottish' (this also applies to Wales and those pesky Northern Irish, wot!).

Huzzah! More glory for the Emparh! :)


I suggest an amendment to rule number 6:

The 'United Kingdom' shall be defined in the following way: an English success is 'English'. An English failure is 'Henman'. A Henman success is a bloody miracle! A Scottish success is 'British.' A Scottish failure is 'Scottish' (this also applies to Wales and those pesky Northern Irish, wot!).

Done, sah!
And what splendid news, might I say. Why, it almost rivals that of the news of Wellesley's Waterloo victory, wotwot!

And sorry for being absent from the thread for a couple of days, everyone. I've been a bit frustrated with my life recently so I'm visiting forums less in case of arguments.

*Charges into thread riding a horse, flailing a sabre, wearing French Napoleonic attire*

Vive la France! Vers le bas avec la Grande-Bretagne!

*Quickly retreats*

*Charges into thread riding a horse, flailing a sabre, wearing French Napoleonic attire*

Vive la France! Vers le bas avec la Grande-Bretagne!

*Quickly retreats*

*fires glock*

Argh...
I didn't even see your post, sah!

Come back, sah!

On the condition of me acquiring the preceding titles and Minister of Monocles and the As-Yet-Unexpected-And-Unimplemented British Inquistion.

*proffers hand*

For the Emparh.

Admiral of the Fleet has a nice ring, doesn't it?

*Charges into thread riding a horse, flailing a sabre, wearing French Napoleonic attire*

Vive la France! Vers le bas avec la Grande-Bretagne!

*Quickly retreats*

Ghandi. :)

*Charges into thread riding a horse, flailing a sabre, wearing French Napoleonic attire*

Vive la France! Vers le bas avec la Grande-Bretagne!

*Quickly retreats*

Vous lâche ! Vous êtes chauve-souris merde fou pour essayer cela ici ! Je vous empalerai avec mes qualifications bilingues ! Sortie, Grenouille !

*Charges into thread riding a horse, flailing a sabre, wearing French Napoleonic attire*

Vive la France! Vers le bas avec la Grande-Bretagne!

*Quickly retreats*

Vous lâche ! Vous êtes chauve-souris merde fou pour essayer cela ici ! Je vous empalerai avec mes qualifications bilingues ! Sortie, Grenouille !

Fools! The French are NOT the UK's weakness. Their ultimate RPS weakness:

Gandhi. :)

I dare the Brits to try and overcome the might of Gandhi's independence movement.

On the condition of me acquiring the preceding titles and Minister of Monocles and the As-Yet-Unexpected-And-Unimplemented British Inquistion.

*proffers hand*

For the Emparh.

Admiral of the Fleet has a nice ring, doesn't it?

You ask for a lot, but meh.
Done.

You ask for a lot, but meh.
Done.

Ah, I love the smell of extortion in the morning. :D

Ah, I love the smell of extortion in the morning. :D

who do you think you are me :p

Ghandi. :)

Gandhi

Vous lâche ! Vous êtes chauve-souris merde fou pour essayer cela ici ! Je vous empalerai avec mes qualifications bilingues ! Sortie, Grenouille !

Argh! You fiend! Those...spaces! Between the last letter of your word and the exclamation mark! It is butchery, sah! And to do so in French! I'll bloody Waterloo you, wot wot!

Charge!

Gandhi

Thanks for the spelling correction. :)