NationStates Jolt Archive


umm... ok...?

Dakini
12-06-2007, 01:16
What's the deal with exes who pop in every so often to "say hi", but they're not really saying hi, they just want to tell you how their lives are running along smoothly as though you cared.

I mean, if you're going to pretend to want to talk to someone the least you can do is something other than just blather on for a bit about what you're up to, like perhaps asking them how they are and what they're up to? I kinda thought this made up polite conversation...
Johnny B Goode
12-06-2007, 01:18
If I knew, I'd tell you. My stache sense says he's probably a creep.
New Manvir
12-06-2007, 01:19
because they're jerks?
Greater Trostia
12-06-2007, 01:20
because they're jerks?

Of course they're jerks. That's not only why ya break up with them, it's why ya dated them to begin with!
Tatarica
12-06-2007, 01:23
Of course they're jerks. That's not only why ya break up with them, it's why ya dated them to begin with!


Word!
Druidville
12-06-2007, 01:24
As a guy, I make it a point not to talk to the ex's I've dumped. Honestly, I don't care how they're doing. Fallen off the face of the earth and into Bill Gate's Hell? Fine, enjoy the trip. Kicking butt and taking names? Have Fun! Celebate? Great!

They're not my bother any more.
Dakini
12-06-2007, 01:24
because they're jerks?
I think that this guy is more the pathetic sort of type who wants to make himself feel superior.
Zilam
12-06-2007, 01:26
What's the deal with exes who pop in every so often to "say hi", but they're not really saying hi, they just want to tell you how their lives are running along smoothly as though you cared.

I mean, if you're going to pretend to want to talk to someone the least you can do is something other than just blather on for a bit about what you're up to, like perhaps asking them how they are and what they're up to? I kinda thought this made up polite conversation...

Guy are jerks. End of story. He wants to make it seem as if his life is better without you(which I would doubt). The best thing to do is grin and bare it. Counter back how well your life is going. :)
Dakini
12-06-2007, 01:28
As a guy, I make it a point not to talk to the ex's I've dumped. Honestly, I don't care how they're doing. Fallen off the face of the earth and into Bill Gate's Hell? Fine, enjoy the trip. Kicking butt and taking names? Have Fun! Celebate? Great!

They're not my bother any more.
I dunno, I wouldn't mind talking to him if he actually acted like he wanted to talk instead of being like "oh yeah, so I'm doing this and this and this... oh look I have to go". Like I do talk to some exes and we actually talk about things instead of just listening to him brag about his insignificant successes.
Imperial isa
12-06-2007, 01:30
only time my mate's ex drops by it's to start shit for all
Dakini
12-06-2007, 01:32
Guy are jerks. End of story. He wants to make it seem as if his life is better without you(which I would doubt). The best thing to do is grin and bare it. Counter back how well your life is going. :)
I would have, but he took off before I could.

Although I don't really care what he thinks of me and I think that perhaps pointing out that his achievements are insignificant and crushing his ego wouldn't be particularly nice of me. I'm not that vindictive.
Katganistan
12-06-2007, 01:40
Next time he just happens to drop by, just happen to have a previous engagement.
Mikesburg
12-06-2007, 01:44
This is a reason why I'm a fan of the clean break. Perhaps this guy has a hatchet he never buried? Perhaps you insinuated that he wouldn't amount to something or something along those lines? Who knows.

Either he's trying to 'get back' at you, for some perceived poor treatment, or he's trying to get back 'with' you, by listing his many accomplishments. It's all supposition, but you know the guy best, and nuance means everything.

Either way, best to burn brigdes and dance around the ashes I say.
Vittos the City Sacker
12-06-2007, 01:49
they just want to tell you how their lives are running along smoothly as though you cared.

Sounds like he did a good job.
Infinite Revolution
12-06-2007, 01:56
either they're still in love with you and they're actually a complete mess and want you back, or they really are doing well and they hate you and they are smug dickheads who want to rub your face in it. i'd bet on the former, unless you are in the habit of dating arseholes.
Psychotic Mongooses
12-06-2007, 01:57
This is a reason why I'm a fan of the clean break.

Is there ever such a thing in a relationship?
Mikesburg
12-06-2007, 02:00
Is there ever such a thing in a relationship?

Yup.
Psychotic Mongooses
12-06-2007, 02:04
Yup.

Then you're quite lucky.
Ilie
12-06-2007, 02:08
It's very common, kind of the "just wanted to let you know how I'm doing because you obviously think about me as constantly as I think about you" thing.
Riknaht
12-06-2007, 02:11
You know, I think it's best to be honest and tell your ex how truly bad your life is. Everythings miserable, you've lost your purpose, no longer living but rather dying.

It's almost as bad as when you were together.
Mikesburg
12-06-2007, 02:19
Then you're quite lucky.

I suppose it's one of the advantages of a long distance relationship. The odds of 'bumping into' someone aren't likely.
East Begorrahland
12-06-2007, 02:29
Guy are jerks. End of story.

Do NOT stereotype us guys by saying we are ALL jerks. We are NOT all jerks. SOME of us may be, but being a man does not automatically make any of us a jerk.:mad:

WOMEN are just as capable of being jerks as we men are.
East Begorrahland
12-06-2007, 02:30
As a guy, I make it a point not to talk to the ex's I've dumped. Honestly, I don't care how they're doing. Fallen off the face of the earth and into Bill Gate's Hell? Fine, enjoy the trip. Kicking butt and taking names? Have Fun! Celebate? Great!

They're not my bother any more.

Ditto here. Agree 100%. 110%, in fact.
Infinite Revolution
12-06-2007, 02:31
Do NOT stereotype us guys by saying we are ALL jerks. We are NOT all jerks. SOME of us may be, but being a man does not automatically make any of us a jerk.:mad:

WOMEN are just as capable of being jerks as we men are.

oh noez, yor stereotyps r opressing meeeee!!!!


(only if you believe them, eh? ... well, also if your associates believe them too, but if that's the case you have the wrong associates)
East Begorrahland
12-06-2007, 02:34
oh noez, yor stereotyps r opressing meeeee!!!!


(only if you believe them, eh? ... well, also if your associates believe them too, but if that's the case you have the wrong associates)

The problem is not whether or not I believe them (FTR, I don't), but that WOMEN believe them.
Infinite Revolution
12-06-2007, 02:35
The problem is not whether or not I believe them (FTR, I don't), but that WOMEN believe them.

what, all of them?!


now who's stereoptyping? like i said, you need better associates.
Ghost Tigers Rise
12-06-2007, 02:42
Do NOT stereotype us guys by saying we are ALL jerks. We are NOT all jerks. SOME of us may be, but being a man does not automatically make any of us a jerk.:mad:

WOMEN are just as capable of being jerks as we men are.

Nope. Women are far nicer than men, in all cases.

Men, however, are superior in every other way. That's why we get paid more.
Darknovae
12-06-2007, 02:42
Most of the guys I've gone out with have tried to ask me out again.

Three of them, anyway.

Ex A thinks he can be a perv.

Ex B is completely wrapped around band. That's really all he's into. And me. He's totally into me too... still. On the trip to Canada he was trying to kiss me and all that... while I was trying to write. Nothing pisses me off more than people trying to mess with me while I write. Once he got the hint that I wasn't into him anymore, he started to flirt with two of my friends, who weren't into him. One managed to tell him off, while the B basically attached himself to my other friend. :mad:

Ex C STILL thinks he has a chance. He doesn't. Now he just annoys the hell out of me.
Darknovae
12-06-2007, 02:44
Nope. Women are far nicer than men, in all cases.

Men, however, are superior in every other way. That's why we get paid more.

*slap*

Women > men.
German Nightmare
12-06-2007, 03:06
What's the deal with exes who pop in every so often to "say hi", but they're not really saying hi, they just want to tell you how their lives are running along smoothly as though you cared.

I mean, if you're going to pretend to want to talk to someone the least you can do is something other than just blather on for a bit about what you're up to, like perhaps asking them how they are and what they're up to? I kinda thought this made up polite conversation...
And that is why I have their bones nicely stacked in my basement.

Wait... did I just say this out loud? :eek::p:D

(I honestly have not contact whatsoever with any of my exes except for one. And even with her I haven't spoken in years and only recently received an eMail where she did indeed express genuine interest in how I was doing. I have yet to answer her, though, and it's not on any list of priorities I might have.)
OcceanDrive
12-06-2007, 03:07
As a guy, I make it a point not to talk to the ex's I've dumped. Honestly, I don't care how they're doing. Fallen off the face of the earth and into Bill Gate's Hell? Fine, enjoy the trip. Kicking butt and taking names? Have Fun! Celebate? Great!Yup..
Caller ID.. cant live without it.

Phone is ringing.. let it ring. just let it ring.

and Now ladies and gentlemen.. a song for all the beautiful girls of my life.. I love each one of you.

______________________________

"I can't deny we had some good times.
We would ride a bike built for two.
But I can't lie to you.
The rumors coming through. Oh.

Another girl's arousing my (woooo)
curiosity.

Another girl's arousing my (woooo)
curiosity.

And there's not a thing I can do.

I thought my ways would change around you.
I was wrong. I can't be tamed.
It's been a pleasure loving you.
But now the pleasure's through. Oh.

Another girl's arousing my (woooo)
curiosity.

Another girl's arousing my (woooo)
curiosity.

I can't deny we had some good times.
Hanging out without a parachute.
But if I stay with you
I'll have to cut myself in two. Oh.

Another girl's arousing my (woooo)
curiosity.

Another girl's arousing my (woooo)
curiosity.

And there's not a thing I can do.
__________________________________

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AjA1gU_9pjo
Maineiacs
12-06-2007, 03:08
My ex used to call me up specifically to tell me how much happier she was with her new boyfriend. She kept it up until I moved and didn't tell her where I was going.
Mikesburg
12-06-2007, 03:13
My ex used to call me up specifically to tell me how much happier she was with her new boyfriend. She kept it up until I moved and didn't tell her where I was going.

That's a problematic ex.
Maineiacs
12-06-2007, 03:14
That's a problematic ex.

No, that's a psychotic ex. I seem to have a knack for attracting crazy women.
Mikesburg
12-06-2007, 03:20
No, that's a psychotic ex. I seem to have a knack for attracting crazy women.

Or being attracted TO crazy women.

Do you get all hot and bothered when you're watching the movie Carrie, and lust after the mother? That might be a sign.
Maineiacs
12-06-2007, 03:23
Or being attracted TO crazy women.

Do you get all hot and bothered when you're watching the movie Carrie, and lust after the mother? That might be a sign.

Eww... just...ewww.
Darknovae
12-06-2007, 03:26
Or being attracted TO crazy women.

Do you get all hot and bothered when you're watching the movie Carrie, and lust after the mother? That might be a sign.

:eek:

Dude...

I'm speechless. :eek:
Mikesburg
12-06-2007, 03:31
Eww... just...ewww.

:eek:

Dude...

I'm speechless. :eek:

Ah, good.

*puts another notch on his keyboard*

Make that two.
Ghost Tigers Rise
12-06-2007, 03:32
*slap*

Women > men.

Please. Everyone knows women are possessed sex dolls.

Only a demon could cause so much pain through the act of talking. :D
Darknovae
12-06-2007, 03:32
Please. Everyone knows women are possessed sex dolls.

Only a demon could cause so much pain through the act of talking. :D

:eek: *slap* Just for that, I'm stealing your trebuchet. :mad:
Ghost Tigers Rise
12-06-2007, 03:33
Or being attracted TO crazy women.

Do you get all hot and bothered when you're watching the movie Carrie, and lust after the mother? That might be a sign.

...I may have to reconsider my life, now...
Maineiacs
12-06-2007, 04:46
:eek: *slap* Just for that, I'm stealing your trebuchet. :mad:

Now, what would a girl your age do with a trebuchet?



Wait, don't answer that...
Dakini
12-06-2007, 20:53
Sounds like he did a good job.
Not really, I don't care how his life is, I just care that he feels the need to bother me with details of his life.
Dakini
12-06-2007, 20:56
Yup..
Caller ID.. cant live without it.

Phone is ringing.. let it ring. just let it ring.
Well, he msn'd me and I thought that he might actually have something important to say (we're in the same marching band except that I havent' been able to go lately due to work) so I responded.
Tatarica
12-06-2007, 21:06
What's wrong with you people? :p

With all my ex'es I get along super.. now I read this topic and notice how almost everyone claims that they've got psychotic, odd, egoist and whatnot ex'es.. :rolleyes:
Dakini
12-06-2007, 21:31
With all my ex'es I get along super.. now I read this topic and notice how almost everyone claims that they've got psychotic, odd, egoist and whatnot ex'es.. :rolleyes:
No, some of my exes are fine. It's just that this one's a bit annoying, he also always says hi to my current bf in the hall (they have offices near each other) even though they've never been introduced.
Darknovae
12-06-2007, 21:32
Now, what would a girl your age do with a trebuchet?



Wait, don't answer that...

I'd just hide it so LNI wouldn't launch his flaming corpse at me, which he enjoys doing. :p
Gravlen
12-06-2007, 21:54
I don't suffer such a problem, nor do I inflict it on others...

Then again I have ex'es I don't speak to and ex'es I've been very friendly with post relationship... It's always different :)
Neo Bretonnia
12-06-2007, 21:59
Generally I've found that the only reason an ex maintains contact with someone is that they're holding out a candle and want to keep communication lines open.

No matter how twisted that might be or no matter how consistently the visit might result in a confrontation, the fact is that if they were completely over you, you'd never hear from them.

And it might not even be that deep emotionally. A while back my wife suddently started getting phonecalls from a guy that she had once been close with. They had never truly become an item but for a time it was definitely heading that way before this guy suddenly knocked up some girl and married her. A couple years later suddenly he's calling my wife (fiancee at the time) just to "Touch bases and see how she was."

I told her he was putting out feelers. She assured me I was being silly. I shrugged, because I knew time would vindicate my statement.

Next phonecall she got he started dumping about how unhappy he was in his marriage and how he wished he were still single and that he hadn't broke things off with her yadda yadda yadda. She listened sympathetically, but later in the conversation our relationship came up and she told him that it was really going great.

He never called again.

I'm keeping that "I told you so" in reserve.
OcceanDrive
13-06-2007, 02:17
.. suddenly he's calling my wife (fiancee at the time) just to "Touch bases and...Do you know if he ever made it to second base? :D

Me bad.. I could not help-it