NationStates Jolt Archive

Well, at least they didn't kill him, or pull a train on his ass.

Thursday, May 3, 2007 A man in South Africa was robbed by armed thieves who broke into his house – then stripped him naked and superglued him to his exercise bike.

The man was forced to look on, helpless, at the burglars ransacked his house, and helped themselves to his finest Chivas Regal Scotch whisky while they were at it.

The men – smartly dressed in suits – kidnapped the man in an affluent Johannesburg suburb, and forced him to take them to his house. Once there, they made him strip, then superglued him to the seat of the exercise bike. The also superglued his hands and feet, and – just to make sure – superglued his mouth shut as well.

The man was only discovered when his partner arrived home several hours later. He was eventually removed from the exercise bike by emergency services, using a mixture of chemicals and Vaseline.

http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=47744&in_page_id=2

Of course, this story is useless without pictures.

While I'm not a fan of criminals, I do believe that this group shows some imagination that is commendable. I hope that the next time they strike, we're provided with some new form of humiliation that tops this one.

I also hope that other criminals take note, and instead of killing people, try to outdo each other in this way.

I support prank related crimes. Stealing a mans whiskey is pretty low but glueing him to his bike, thats ingenious. Crimes not going to go away, so why not have some fun with it eh?

Well, at least they didn't kill him, or pull a train on his ass.



http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=47744&in_page_id=2

Of course, this story is useless without pictures.

While I'm not a fan of criminals, I do believe that this group shows some imagination that is commendable. I hope that the next time they strike, we're provided with some new form of humiliation that tops this one.

I also hope that other criminals take note, and instead of killing people, try to outdo each other in this way.

This gets the Goofball Seal of Approval! :)

Pathetic. When a society can even countenance accepting a crime, or lauding as it "funny", I would imagine it lacks something in a moral sense. Has anybody cared to consider the mental anguish caused to the victim? Much like the majority of criminals, I fear not.

This gets the Goofball Seal of Approval! :)

Hmmm....

"Mr. Goofballs, exactly where were you on the night in question?"

:p

This gets the Goofball Seal of Approval! :)

I feel so honored!

Well, at least they didn't kill him, or pull a train on his ass.



http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=47744&in_page_id=2

Of course, this story is useless without pictures.

While I'm not a fan of criminals, I do believe that this group shows some imagination that is commendable. I hope that the next time they strike, we're provided with some new form of humiliation that tops this one.

I also hope that other criminals take note, and instead of killing people, try to outdo each other in this way.*LOL at image...*

That's alot of superglue... "A thousand and one uses... now a thousand and two."

But you have to be careful. I remember one story where a person caught their significant other cheating on em. the punnishment? her hand was superglued to his... tool... the problem... the chemical was absorbed through the membrane and I believe it had to be amputated.

The man was only discovered when his partner arrived home several hours later.
Sounds like the hate crime mobile is going to be coming soon.

Pathetic. When a society can even countenance accepting a crime, or lauding as it "funny", I would imagine it lacks something in a moral sense. Has anybody cared to consider the mental anguish caused to the victim? Much like the majority of criminals, I fear not.

Nobody got hurt. They may be criminals, and if they're caught, they'll certainly do time. I'm not going to break em out of jail. :p But can't one applaud their mischievous natures?

As for mental anguish; have you ever been superglued naked to anything or anyone? I have. I turned out okay. :)

Pathetic. When a society can even countenance accepting a crime, or lauding as it "funny", I would imagine it lacks something in a moral sense. Has anybody cared to consider the mental anguish caused to the victim? Much like the majority of criminals, I fear not.

did anyone say they didn't care about the victim? someone alluded that such humiliation was better than killing the victim... and I kinda agree. at least, when those two are caught, you have someone who can testify.

meanwhile, the image is still chuckleworthy.

Egghiccup;12609128']They should have superglued his anus shut and given him some prunes and laxatives.

I bet his eyes would have popped out!! :D

:gundge:

Better yet, feed him some broccoli (any fresh veggie should work) and see if farting out one ears is actually possible.

Hmmm....

"Mr. Goofballs, exactly where were you on the night in question?"

:p

Uh...

<_<

>_>

I want my lawyer.

Nobody got hurt. They may be criminals, and if they're caught, they'll certainly do time. I'm not going to break em out of jail. :p But can't one applaud their mischievous natures?

As for mental anguish; have you ever been superglued naked to anything or anyone? I have. I turned out okay. :)

and can you imagine what those two would go through in jail?

and you can't end your post like that without the details LG.

Nobody got hurt. They may be criminals, and if they're caught, they'll certainly do time. I'm not going to break em out of jail. :p But can't one applaud their mischievous natures?

As for mental anguish; have you ever been superglued naked to anything or anyone? I have. I turned out okay. :)

Yet to be proven.

I wonder if "the partner" took advantage of the situation before calling the police.

If he had had this (http://www.hollanders.com/supplies/bookbinding/images/bbgluegun.jpg), they wouldn't have stood a chance!

and can you imagine what those two would go through in jail?

and you can't end your post like that without the details LG.

SOme things are better left to the imagination. ;)

If he had had this (http://www.hollanders.com/supplies/bookbinding/images/bbgluegun.jpg), they wouldn't have stood a chance!

I think my wife HAS one of those.:eek:

I think my wife HAS one of those.:eek:

Well, she glued my dick to my stomach - it still itches...

Yet to be proven.

I'm using a broad definition of 'okay'. *nod*

I think my wife HAS one of those.:eek:

My parents have two of them... :eek:

I'm using a broad definition of 'okay'. *nod*

The master of understatement strikes again.:D

BTW this gets added to my "creative uses of superglue file.

If he had had this (http://www.hollanders.com/supplies/bookbinding/images/bbgluegun.jpg), they wouldn't have stood a chance!

I wouldn't want to imagine someone being hot melt glued naked onto a bike seat. That's got to hurt like a motherfucker.

I wouldn't want to imagine someone being hot melt glued naked onto a bike seat. That's got to hurt like a motherfucker.

Yes, it does. :(


...

what?

Well at least it wasn't weird or unnecessary

The master of understatement strikes again.:D

BTW this gets added to my "creative uses of superglue file.

Superglue is useful, but often gets a lot more attention than it deserves. There are many other glues that are quite entertaining that one rarely hears about. *nod*

I wonder how long it took for the partner to realize that he wasn't just getting a workout.

Nobody got hurt. They may be criminals, and if they're caught, they'll certainly do time. I'm not going to break em out of jail. :p But can't one applaud their mischievous natures?

No. From what I infer from the text, they stole the majority of his possessions, not simply the odd bottle of alcohol. Moreover, in supergluing his mouth together, tehy risked poisoning him.

Isn't South Africa the home of all those weird Car Protection systems with flame throwers and airbags that explode out of the ceiling?
Something about living that close to Antarctica must just make people crazy.

Superglue is useful, but often gets a lot more attention than it deserves. There are many other glues that are quite entertaining that one rarely hears about. *nod*... glitter glue?

No. From what I infer from the text, they stole the majority of his possessions, not simply the odd bottle of alcohol. Moreover, in supergluing his mouth together, tehy risked poisoning him.
not just the mouth, but the skin around the genital area can also absorb chemicals that can poison a person.

... glitter glue?

I like the way you think. :)