NationStates Jolt Archive

My friends and I recently got into a debate about who we thought would win in a fight: Master Chief, IG-88, Terminator(1st), or Jesus. Personally, I think that Terminator would win, being almost indestructable. But I'd like to hear anyone elses thoughts, comments, opinions, or jokes. (P.S., they're all fighting at the same time with their full arsenals at hand.)

what is IG-88?

Supposition time is it? Jesus would clearly win, his powers are unlimited after all, they come from a deity.

what is IG-88?

:eek:

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/IG-88

IG-88 is a killing robot from Star Wars. Try looking it up on wicipedia or google it.

Jesus surely can't match up against MC driving 100 tons of tank whoop-ass.

On a side note, I'd love to see Jesus' weapons.

Jesus would win, he can respawn.

Jesus wouldn't nessicarly win; he might not recieve power from God or choose not to fight. He's a wild card

Jesus would win, he can respawn.

Yeah, but he's lagging.


Srsly, beyond the meme, it's awful trying to hit a bad lagger with guns, or anything.

If the Terminator was a Reprog from TechCom then it would probably side with MC and Jesus. Otherwise it would nominally join up with IG-88.

But IG-88 got its shiny metal ass blown out of space by Boba Fett so it's not even putting up a fight.

Jesus wouldn't want to fight, and try to encourage peace. But if sorely pressed he would resort to unleashing the Jesus Christ Superstar Roundhouse Kick, adapted from the lengthy lessons taught to him by sensei Chuck Norris.

Jesus is a hippie, with his whole "love your enemy" stuff...

The terminator would win

I have played the hell out of Halo 2, so I know what MC can and can't do. I'm going to say Jesus will win. I mean, he can respawn without turning into a braindead zombie. His father could destroy all of mankind on a whim. He can walk on water. Hell, he could probably heal himself. He's practically invincible, even against an overhyped never-was(like a has-been, but not) and a couple killbots.

Jesus wouldn't nessicarly win; he might not recieve power from God or choose not to fight. He's a wild card

He has the powers from God to begin with. And he will be fighting two robots so it is not as if he will be feeling some kind of sympathy for a human soul. As for Master Chief, Jesus could kill him with a glance or if he doesn't want to kill, simply make himself immortal so nothing that Halo guy can do will have any effect. So this whole "what if" seems rather silly.

not sure about it, exect that jesus will be the first to die.

Alchemy always beats out machines, and Jesus'll just transmute the two bots, so it's between Jesus and Master Chief. And I think with the machines out of the way the two'd probably call it a draw and head off for a drink anyway.

I don't think so. In the future were the Terminator came from, his kind are frequently killed by the humans they are at war with. It's more a matter of having enough firepower.

IG-88, or at least his lessor copies, was easily pwnt by Boba Fett, so he doesn't even warrant much consideration.

Master Chief on the other hand is one of those run n' gun unstoppable forces that single handedly laid waste to entire armies of alien invaders. Also, as protagonist of his own story, it is essential that he never lose.

However, Jesus, being the incarnation of God, would ask his Dad politely to smite MC's dumb ass.

hmmm.... I likely should have not put Jesus in.

hmmm.... I likely should have not put Jesus in.

Obviously not! He wouldn't stand a chance!

Nobody knows who IG-88 is...

Jesus would teleport all his opponents to the phantom zone.

Master Chief.

Rocket Launcher. M6D Pistol. Plasma Grenades. Nuff said.

If a Termie can be brought down with pipe bombs, it could be brought down with blue spiders.

88 can eat rocket.

Jesus gets sniped.

Hamburger gets eaten (something the robots can't do).

Jesus gets sniped.

One does not simply snipe Jesus.

One does not simply snipe Jesus.

People seem to forget that he has the powers of God. (understate much?) The idea that any mortal (or machine in the case of this hypothetical) can kill him without Jesus allowing it to occur is ludicrous.

I like the idea of "you've just been brutally beat down by Jesus" flashing across MC's screen as he dies.

Jesus would kill them all in a few seconds in rage....and then respawn them and sit them on his lap

So survey says....DRAW!

not sure about it, exect that jesus will be the first to die.

Perhaps, but he can respawn. So he'd win.

I kinda like the idea of MC and Jesus teaming up against the Flood, just so he can say "I Kick Ass For the Lord!!"

which Jesus are we on about the mortal version or the full on sword coming out of the mouth ,smitting people one of revelations

which Jesus are we on about the mortal version or the full on sword coming out of the mouth ,smitting people one of revelations

That's just Jesus when somebody truly pisses him off and he goes Super Saiyan.

We're on the New Testament Jesus who can transform into warrior Revelations Jesus.

That's just Jesus when somebody truly pisses him off and he goes Super Saiyan.
Man, I am so ordering a commission for my front room of a stained-glass window of a yellow spiky-haired Jesus shooting an energy beam from his palms.

Master Chief *nods*

The terminator is too slow, star wars is a joke of a poorly written universe, and jesus would well...turn the other cheek.

Finals match: Master Chief vs Kratos :eek:

I kinda like the idea of MC and Jesus teaming up against the Flood, just so he can say "I Kick Ass For the Lord!!"

Everyone knows God sent the Flood in the first place.

Man, I am so ordering a commission for my front room of a stained-glass window of a yellow spiky-haired Jesus shooting an energy beam from his palms.

Is he gonna be doing it traditional Kamehameha, or Old School Jesus Ascending style?

:D

And if you ever get it, post a pic.

My friends and I recently got into a debate about who we thought would win in a fight: Master Chief, IG-88, Terminator(1st), or Jesus. Personally, I think that Terminator would win, being almost indestructable. But I'd like to hear anyone elses thoughts, comments, opinions, or jokes. (P.S., they're all fighting at the same time with their full arsenals at hand.)
Jesus did push a boy off of a roof and killed him according to the Gospel of Judas or summin.
Jesus wins.

IG-88

I've always wondered, was the number 88 chosen on purpose? Or was it just some number that sounded cool?

Ridley wins. And if he doesn't he gets rebuilt and comes back.

Terminator and IG-88 would both evaluate each other as the greatest threat, (the other two would be dismissed as "only human") and attack each other. Both are purpose designed assassin robots, but the Terminator has the capacity to function with more severe damage, so he would defeat IG-88. Meanwhile, Master Chief guns Jesus down quite easily, then hits the Terminator with a series of rockets and grenades, winning the fight without even being scratched. However, Jesus comes back from the dead three days later and kills Master Chief in his sleep.

Jesus, with such a high midi-chlorian count, has the powers of force speed, force jump and force protection. The Terminator and IG-88 are merely droids; useless against a lightsaber in skilled hands. The Master Chief's fancy armour won't protect him against Jesus' mastery of nature; force lightning.

Mr. Rogers (http://www.weebls-stuff.com/toons/ultimate+showdown/) wins.

I don't know who this particular Master Chief you speak of is, but I can tell you that I know many Master Chiefs (my cousin, for instance, is a Master Chief Petty Officer in the SEALs) and they can beat God.

I don't know who this particular Master Chief you speak of is, but I can tell you that I know many Master Chiefs (my cousin, for instance, is a Master Chief Petty Officer in the SEALs) and they can beat God.

Halo games

Jesus thinking aloud:
Ok, last time I did not ask for daddies help and was crucified. That was very slow, extremely painful and generally unpleasant - not to mention the resurrection really stung. So let us not repeat such a mistake.

"Daddy, could you please kill these thingies for me ? Thank you. You're the coolest !".

Jesus did push a boy off of a roof and killed him according to the Gospel of Judas or summin.
Jesus wins.

And brought the kid back to life. Jesus double wins.

Jesus has access to The Ultimate Godmode.

Jesus wins... if he ever decided that turning the other cheek just simply wasn't going to work.

Then he goes Super Saiyan with a sword in one hand.

And finishes off everyone with his Crucifixion Stance Kamehameha.

:D

Jesus has access to The Ultimate Godmode.

Jesus wins... if he ever decided that turning the other cheek just simply wasn't going to work.

Then he goes Super Saiyan with a sword in one hand.

And finishes off everyone with his Crucifixion Stance Kamehameha.

:D

And then he gets speared by Pontius Pilate...who gets assassinated by the Terminator, which gets disassembled by IG-88, which gets destroyed by the Terminator that was sent back in time to get rid of the IG-88....which gets destroyed by another IG-88 knockoff...and the universe collapses.

http://www.ultimateshowdown.org/ You guys will like this.

BTW I'm not a religious church type but dude.. its Jesus. Jesus FTW.

I eat the hamburger, Master Chief, IG-88 and, and Terminator duke it out for awhile and MC gives up after Terminator and IG-88 are piles of droid rubble. Jesus tells him to get back to his video game and never bother the real world again.

Terminator vs Jesus?
Been done:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xbYfKHzQ_B0

And brought the kid back to life. Jesus double wins.
Jesus is lawlsome.

The Terminator would just be sent back in time to kill Jesus's mother.

Perhaps, but he can respawn. So he'd win.

how can he respawn? He's just a guy. If he has the power of respawning, then so do I.

how can he respawn? He's just a guy. If he has the power of respawning, then so do I.

I say we test this theory *pumps shotgun*

I say we test this theory *pumps shotgun*

Hey! You can't kill some-one over the internet! We don't have the technology yet!

And since you don't know where I live, I win by default.

Hey! You can't kill some-one over the internet! We don't have the technology yet!

I'll get Chandelier to do it. She can.

how can he respawn? He's just a guy. If he has the power of respawning, then so do I.
Please got to Danzig or whatever dull name you call it now, and walk on water.
Please do and keep walking and don't come back now, ya hear.
*Beverly Hillbillies thee music plays*

how can he respawn? He's just a guy. If he has the power of respawning, then so do I.

He's not just a guy, he's Jesus. Why would you put real life limits on Jesus when two contestants are robots and one is some kind of super soldier with magic armor(I don't play Halo, feel free to correct me on what the hell Master Chief is)?

Hey! You can't kill some-one over the internet! We don't have the technology yet!

And since you don't know where I live, I win by default.

You're the guy from Warsaw with no sense of humour. Shouldn't be too hard to find you.

He's not just a guy, he's Jesus. Why would you put real life limits on Jesus when two contestants are robots and one is some kind of super soldier with magic armor(I don't play Halo, feel free to correct me on what the hell Master Chief is)?
Maybe even Chef from Southpark...

You're the guy from Warsaw with no sense of humour. Shouldn't be too hard to find you.
What? All Poles are like that...

Sorry

Are we talking standard issue Jesus or the 50ft variety?

What? All Poles are like that...

Sorry

Pun-tastic.

Are we talking standard issue Jesus or the 50ft variety?

It's Raptor Jesus.

Please got to Danzig or whatever dull name you call it now, and walk on water.
Please do and keep walking and don't come back now, ya hear.
*Beverly Hillbillies thee music plays*
he fight on that
You're the guy from Warsaw with no sense of humour. Shouldn't be too hard to find you.

i think they all are like that

He's not just a guy, he's Jesus. Why would you put real life limits on Jesus when two contestants are robots and one is some kind of super soldier with magic armor(I don't play Halo, feel free to correct me on what the hell Master Chief is)?

Typical middle-ages type, any science you don't understand is instantly classified as "magic".

And for anyone that loves Spartan IIs, this (http://www.gametrailers.com/umwatcher.php?id=57998) video is pretty cool... although it slowly degenerates into a fanboy's wet dream over its course.

EDIT: What do I mean degenerates into... it actually transitions from figuratively to literally

Typical middle-ages type, any science you don't understand is instantly classified as "magic".

So Halo has real science behind that suit? Or just jargon for fanboys to fap too?

Pun-tastic.

... pun? All I did was joke about how Polish people have no sense of humour. :confused:

... pun? All I did was joke about how Polish people have no sense of humour. :confused:

Poles-no sense of humour.
poles-no sense of humour.

Pun.

Jesus converts all the contendants into followers and wins. Then, since he's from Middle-East and has got a lot of WMD as followers, he gets blasted into smithereens by a nuke sent by Mr.Bush, who then chokes while eating an hamburger-on-a-pretzel.

The hamburger wins.:D

So Halo has real science behind that suit? Or just jargon for fanboys to fap too?

I don't know and I don't care.

Poles-no sense of humour.
poles-no sense of humour.

Pun.
*gags*

I don't know and I don't care.

Then I stand by my claims of magic armour.

So Halo has real science behind that suit? Or just jargon for fanboys to fap too?

Then I stand by my claims of magic armour.

yes there is real science behind that suit
it stuff the US trying to make real

yes there is real science behind that suit
it stuff the US trying to make real

Cool, real magic armour.


Maybe the magic armour bit is getting a little old now :p

Poles-no sense of humour.
poles-no sense of humour.

Pun.
Those Barber polls are rather funny.

yes there is real science behind that suit
it stuff the US trying to make real

It is stuff France (the Félin suit) and Germany already have. The French suit is better and ready to roll for about 30000 french infantrymen, deliveries begin this year.:cool:

It is stuff France (the Félin suit) and Germany already have. The French suit is better and ready to roll for about 30000 french infantrymen, deliveries begin this year.:cool:

France beat America? Yay!

It is stuff France (the Félin suit) and Germany already have. The French suit is better and ready to roll for about 30000 french infantrymen, deliveries begin this year.:cool:

thats why i said trying to make real :D
but really if the suit from Halo was real i think it be better then those two

thats why i said trying to make real :D
but really if the suit from Halo was real i think it be better then those two

Awww - rightyho.
I'd love the Ghost suit of Starcraft, anyway.

Awww - rightyho.
I'd love the Ghost suit of Starcraft, anyway.

both are cool

I kinda like the idea of MC and Jesus teaming up against the Flood, just so he can say "I Kick Ass For the Lord!!"

Isn't that a quote from Dead Alive, the B zombie flick Peter Jackson made before LOTR?