NationStates Jolt Archive

How happy was your childhood? Mine was one of the deeper circles of Hell, but how did you live the first years of your life?

How happy was your childhood? Mine was one of the deeper circles of Hell, but how did you live the first years of your life?
As far as I remember, at home in a nappy.

Fucking shitly.

I'm not sure I could describe it as happy, more like ignorant, considering that when I was around 13 I realised I was not happy and could not remember being happy ever.

the best childhood imaginable ;)

I hated it immensely and thought it was the absolute lowest pit of Hell! But, compared to what I've learned about other people's childhoods--information I never got to see when I myself was a child (like about child abuse, etc.)--mine would actually have been one of the higher circles of Hell.

But still Hell. Such lack of empowerment...ARGH! My passing the "magic" birthday, #18, was a very good thing indeed.

A lot of frustration instantly vaporized upon the Law's recognition of my right to say NO to various lousy "family" ideas. The fact that my "YES, I'm doing it"s also have to be honored was/is equally important.

I was a lucky one. Great childhood for me.

Jolt bumped me above LG. What a great day.

I behaved very oddly back then. :)

it was ok. not spectacular, but not bad either. i only realy started liking my life recently, although i had some fun before that too. i especially remember lego and drawing.

How happy was your childhood? Mine was one of the deeper circles of Hell, but how did you live the first years of your life?
My childhood was extremely happy. My parents rock. Hi Mom and Dad! *wave*

Pretty awesome up till about age 10/11.

I don't know, I was built as an adult by the Umbrella Corporation

Good patches, some bad. I was bullied and that sucked. My mother was and still is a total bitch... but at least I still have my best friend around and my cat! My cat turns 15 soon! ^_^

No wrecks and nobody drownded,
Fact, nothing to laugh at at all.

in some ways good, in others it was bad.

i had a roof over my head, food in my belly, and loving, non-abusive parents.

however i also had parents who rarely had time for me, who were going through shit and couldn't really keep it from me (all the shouting and stuff), and who were kinda pushy. also had dyslexia, which got me labelled "stupid" by teachers at school, i was bullied, and our our house was in the middle of nowhere so i was often lonely. we lost the house and stuff when i was 10 or so, too. that kinda sucked.

i have some happy memories and some severely distressing memories and some truly horrific memories and some latent feelings that things happened that weren't right without actually being remembered. all my happiest memories were when i was not at school, my worst memories are fairly evenly divided between school and home.

but the fact is i don't really trust my memory to give me an accurate picture of my childhood seeing as it is barely adequate for recalling the events of last week.

what i'm trying to say is, i haven't a fucking clue if my childhood was a happy one or not, but i do have an overall bad feeling about it.

I had 2 much older brothers other than that I guess I can describe it as doing cough and drop before realizing the doctors hands are warm

though I think I spent far too much time playing with my penis :p

i had ADHD have ADHD and am a kid i love it!!!

my childhood was fine as long as I was high or drunk or away from home. (preferably a combo of two... that made things just skippy!)

Well so far I'm glad that at least I didn't have a little sister, from what I've heard they're about the most irritating thing in the world. Two brothers the same age as me was (and still is) annoying though, especially when they gang up on me.

At first I was ignorant and childish. Then I was depressed for half a year. Then I more or less became what I am now. Ignorance may be bliss. But it's still ignorance. Flippancy is fairly worthy substitute that keeps depression at bay and doesn't require lack of knowledge. There's some apathy in there too. Seriousness shows up every now and again when it's needed.

I don't know, I was built as an adult by the Umbrella Corporation

ZOMG Resi reference :eek:

I'd rather not talk about it.

But once, when somebody asked me "Wouldn't it be great to be a kid again?", my immediate response was to say, "God, no!"

I'm quite enjoying mine, I reckon.

I'd rather not talk about it.

But once, when somebody asked me "Wouldn't it be great to be a kid again?", my immediate response was to say, "God, no!"

I know what you mean. When people say "oh, kids, what could they possibly be stressed/worried/depressed about?" I keep wanting to say "the same things adults would be stressed/worried/depressed about except it's worse because you have little control over your circumstances"

stupid happy childhood people. :mad:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=4Sa0MkWoeTk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_tBdliqSM4

I know what you mean. When people say "oh, kids, what could they possibly be stressed/worried/depressed about?" I keep wanting to say "the same things adults would be stressed/worried/depressed about except it's worse because you have little control over your circumstances"

stupid happy childhood people. :mad:

when i say i want to be a kid again i mean i wish i could start over again, not relive it. that's just me though.

when i say i want to be a kid again i mean i wish i could start over again, not relive it. that's just me though.

I can't figure out how to be a kid again without all the crap that happened to me happening again.

I can't figure out how to be a kid again without all the crap that happened to me happening again.

Black Magic? http://www.newgrounds.com/icon/176000/portal_176037.gif

I can't figure out how to be a kid again without all the crap that happened to me happening again.

I have it figured out. All I'd have to do is relive childhood -- as someone else.

I have it figured out. All I'd have to do is relive childhood -- as someone else.

Every time I think about reliving my life. The fact that I would be a completely different person with no memories of my sixteen years and all the people I've met in that time stop me from thinking about it any more.

Every time I think about reliving my life. The fact that I would be a completely different person with no memories of my sixteen years and all the people I've met in that time stop me from thinking about it any more.

In my case, that would be a good thing.

In my case, that would be a good thing.

me too :) if I figure out how to do that, I will let you know k?

I have it figured out. All I'd have to do is relive childhood -- as someone else.

I'm actually doing quite well by living vicariously through my son's childhood. He has a lot of the same "issues" I had, but since I'm aware of them, I have a much better idea of how to deal with them and help him than my parents did. So he's doing quite well, and is a mostly happy little kid. (He's 2, so he's not happy all of the time, but compared to most 2-year-olds, he's not bad at all.)

And before anyone starts, no, I'm not going to try to make him be me. That was my dad's problem with me. I'm going to give him the space to make his own choices, and just try to give him the guidance he needs to make good ones. He's smart and good-natured, so I'm confident he'll do well on that score. Just seeing my son happy, and knowing that he trusts me unconditionally, is the best therapy I could have.

Every time I think about reliving my life. The fact that I would be a completely different person with no memories of my sixteen years and all the people I've met in that time stop me from thinking about it any more.

Ever wonder what it would be like going through childhood again knowing what you know now?

If you haven't, don't. It's not healthy. :D

me too :) if I figure out how to do that, I will let you know k?

It's a deal. :)



I'm actually doing quite well by living vicariously through my son's childhood. He has a lot of the same "issues" I had, but since I'm aware of them, I have a much better idea of how to deal with them and help him than my parents did. So he's doing quite well, and is a mostly happy little kid. (He's 2, so he's not happy all of the time, but compared to most 2-year-olds, he's not bad at all.)

And before anyone starts, no, I'm not going to try to make him be me. That was my dad's problem with me. I'm going to give him the space to make his own choices, and just try to give him the guidance he needs to make good ones. He's smart and good-natured, so I'm confident he'll do well on that score. Just seeing my son happy, and knowing that he trusts me unconditionally, is the best therapy I could have.


Yeah, the only positive thing I got from my childhood is that I learned what not to do as a parent.

My sister died, my Mum got cancer and was very ill a lot, then she got depression. I got raped when I was nine.

let's say i block alot of my childhood

I first contemplated suicide at the age of 5.

It was pretty much downhill from there.

Well, I would love to go back in time and relive my childhood. that would give me mom back, and give me a chance to tell her that it was ok, that she didn't need to pick me that day, that I would walk home.

If that makes me a stupid happy childhood person, then I am one, I am as good as any of those stupid people living their traumas today.

I first contemplated suicide at the age of 5.

It was pretty much downhill from there.

Ditto. I first actually attempted it at 11.

Ditto. I first actually attempted it at 11.

Hmm. I've never, ever been that unhappy. Nor have my siblings. Not from the time I was born to my current middle-aged life.

Hmm. I've never, ever been that unhappy. Nor have my siblings. Not from the time I was born to my current middle-aged life.

I've been that unhappy multiple times. But I tend to overreact to things. Whenever I lose things. Things get thrown. Not broken though usually I have enough sanity to protect anything I will need later.

Bad childhood, suicide, what? Didn't you folks know how to get the best out of childhood? Or were you just spoiled kids who expected too much?

Hmm. I've never, ever been that unhappy. Nor have my siblings. Not from the time I was born to my current middle-aged life.

In my experience, it's not a question of happiness or unhappiness. Some people seem to be able to go through any amount of unhappiness and still not ever contemplate suicide. (So far, I fall into that category myself.) Others seem to contemplate it all the time, even though they are far less unhappy or depressed than some others who never contemplate it. It seems that some people - for whatever reason - are prone to suicidal thoughts, and others aren't. There's not much objective rhyme or reason to it.

i had ADHD have ADHD and am a kid i love it!!!
You love ADHD? :confused:

My sister died, my Mum got cancer and was very ill a lot, then she got depression. I got raped when I was nine.

I first contemplated suicide at the age of 5.

It was pretty much downhill from there.

:fluffle:

My sister died, my Mum got cancer and was very ill a lot, then she got depression. I got raped when I was nine.

/thread

*big hugs* :(

Bad childhood, suicide, what? Didn't you folks know how to get the best out of childhood? Or were you just spoiled kids who expected too much?

Well, if you must know, I was physically and emotionally abused, and there are people on this thread who went through worse. Thanks for caring, though.

My sister died, my Mum got cancer and was very ill a lot, then she got depression. I got raped when I was nine.

How old was your sister?

What kind of cancer?

Are you male or female? Was it abuse or outright rape?

In my experience, it's not a question of happiness or unhappiness. Some people seem to be able to go through any amount of unhappiness and still not ever contemplate suicide. (So far, I fall into that category myself.) Others seem to contemplate it all the time, even though they are far less unhappy or depressed than some others who never contemplate it. It seems that some people - for whatever reason - are prone to suicidal thoughts, and others aren't. There's not much objective rhyme or reason to it.

I've seen that as well. There are a few suicidal people I've met - and I can't fathom what's so bad about their life.

Ditto. I first actually attempted it at 11.

that never pop into my head to kill myself

lol, do we have some emos posting in here today.
"my childhood sucked, i have never been happy." lol


my childhood was pretty good. lots of good times.

lol, do we have some emos posting in here today.
"my childhood sucked, i have never been happy." lol


my childhood was pretty good. lots of good times.

Do you have Asperger's Syndrome, by any chance?

I've seen that as well. There are a few suicidal people I've met - and I can't fathom what's so bad about their life.

It's not something that is easy to understand if you've never been through it.

I can't figure out how to be a kid again without all the crap that happened to me happening again.

well yeh, but it's only idle dreaming. like imagining that you got the birthday present that you'd asked for, or imagining that the kids at school had decided someone else ought to be the outcast, or imagining that you're (meaning my) dad had been less depressive and had less seizures, or imagining that you're mum was not prone to violent outburst when things didn't go her way. or whatever, y'know?

lol, do we have some emos posting in here today.
"my childhood sucked, i have never been happy." lol


my childhood was pretty good. lots of good times.

Well good for you. You never had anyone beat you senseless then tell you how much they loved you. Bravo.

I feel bad now. Most depressing thread ever... :(

Well, if you must know, I was physically and emotionally abused, and there are people on this thread who went through worse. Thanks for caring, though.Then maybe I was just lucky? Or the 70s were just better for kids? In what evil country did you grow up? And what is physical and emotional abuse for you?
Well good for you. You never had anyone beat you senseless then tell you how much they loved you. Bravo.and why so you now try to accuse someone of his good childhood?

It's not something that is easy to understand if you've never been through it.

I've been through it. And I still hardly understand it. I'm interested though. Why is everyone still here?

Well good for you. You never had anyone beat you senseless then tell you how much they loved you. Bravo.

That happens to a lot of people. Specially to male children. Doesn't make you anything special.

It's not something that is easy to understand if you've never been through it.

I get the impression that you don't know what it's like never to be depressed, so you probably can't understand me either. You probably think I'm some kind of a freak.

That happens to a lot of people. Specially to male children. Doesn't make you anything special.

Unsurprisingly I'm well aware of that. But thanks for saying so! :fluffle:

I've been through it. And I still hardly understand it. I'm interested though. Why is everyone still here?

Sometimes I wonder why I'm still here. I eventually got out of the situation I was in as a child, but I still have to deal with the aftermath; chronic depression and PTSD.

I get the impression that you don't know what it's like never to be depressed, so you probably can't understand me either. You probably think I'm some kind of a freak.

Actually, no. If you have moments when you aren't depressed, I envy you.

Sometimes I wonder why I'm still here. I eventually got out of the situation I was in as a child, but I still have to deal with the aftermath; chronic depression and PTSD.

Try Cymbalta and neurontin. I've seen it work for people I've known with chronic depression and PTSD (and bipolar on top of it).

That happens to a lot of people. Specially to male children. Doesn't make you anything special.

yup as a two year old i got beaten but mom got the worst of it

Try Cymbalta and neurontin. I've seen it work for people I've known with chronic depression and PTSD (and bipolar on top of it).

I"m already on a very large dose of Wellbutrin. It seems to be working, in as much as I haven't tried to commit suicide since I've been on it.

yup as a two year old i got beaten but mom got the worst of itWhy on earth would someone beat a 2-year-old??

Why on earth would someone beat a 2-year-old??

You'd have to ask isa's parents, or mine.

I"m already on a very large dose of Wellbutrin. It seems to be working, in as much as I haven't tried to commit suicide since I've been on it.

Wellbutrin works only on the norepinephrine receptors. Cymbalta works on those, and on the serotonin receptors at the same time.

Sort of a two-edged approach to depression, and it is rather dramatic in effect.

The neurontin appears to work on PTSD and anxiety without doping you up.

Together, I've seen someone crippled by depression, PTSD, bipolar, and anxiety attacks turn into someone who is not depressed, never anxious, and of normal mood (no more swinging).

Why on earth would someone beat a 2-year-old??

It's quite common. Some people never grow out of being a bully.

You'd have to ask isa's parents, or mine.

ask my step dad an at same time ask why he place a shotgun to my moms head

ask my step dad an at same time ask why he place a shotgun to my moms head

Did he...touched you too?

It's quite common. Some people never grow out of being a bully.Where is this quite common?

Where is this quite common?

Deep America, it seems.

Did he...touched you too?

no but he did to my older sister as i have work out from somethings my mom said

Wellbutrin works only on the norepinephrine receptors. Cymbalta works on those, and on the serotonin receptors at the same time.

Sort of a two-edged approach to depression, and it is rather dramatic in effect.

The neurontin appears to work on PTSD and anxiety without doping you up.

Together, I've seen someone crippled by depression, PTSD, bipolar, and anxiety attacks turn into someone who is not depressed, never anxious, and of normal mood (no more swinging).


I'll have to mention it to my doctor.

Then maybe I was just lucky? Or the 70s were just better for kids? In what evil country did you grow up?
You were just lucky. Child abuse is something that has always gone on and always will go on, in every society in the past and present. You'd have to be living in a fantasy world to think other otherwise.

Anyway, my childhood as a little kid was pretty good. Loving parents and, carefree life. The only thing that certain people would class as abuse was my dad hitting me, but that was only when I screwed up and it wasn't abusive. I'm a teenager now and my dad has an annoying habit of giving me a quick clout round the back of the head when I don't do something quick enough. Grrrrrr.

no but he did to my older sister as i have work out from somethings my mom said

Are you female?

What did you have to do?

Are you female?

What did you have to do?

male

Where is this quite common?

Everywhere. Look around you. Read the newspapers. Hell, there's enough evidence in this thread to prove that child abuse is an unfortunately common occurrence; why can't you see it?

Everywhere. Look around you. Read the newspapers. Hell, there's enough evidence in this thread to prove that child abuse is an unfortunately common occurrence; why can't you see it?
QFT... yeah, UB, what planet are you living on?

Everywhere. Look around you. Read the newspapers. Hell, there's enough evidence in this thread to prove that child abuse is an unfortunately common occurrence; why can't you see it?

I do not believe in what dishonorable scums like you say. :rolleyes:

male

Well, guess it was gender-selective.

Blissful ignorance, as someone had mentioned in another forum. It was the greatest time of my life.

I do not believe in what dishonorable scums like you say. :rolleyes:

Well, well, somebody was finally dumb enough to fall into that trap. It kind of surprised me that, after I'd used this nation name on this forum for so long, nobody had ever tried to use it as an ad hominem attack against me. Believe it or not, you're the first one to do it. Congratulations - you've stooped lower than anyone else on NSG.

But back on topic - don't take my word for it. Take the word of all the other people who have been through hell at the hands of their own family. Or do you so casually dismiss them too, just because you prefer not to believe what they say? :rolleyes:

Well, guess it was gender-selective.

IT got his ass kick by my sceond step dad who help mom get away from him

Well, well, somebody was finally dumb enough to fall into that trap. It kind of surprised me that, after I'd used this nation name on this forum for so long, nobody had ever tried to use it as an ad hominem attack against me. Believe it or not, you're the first one to do it. Congratulations - you've stooped lower than anyone else on NSG.

But back on topic - don't take my word for it. Take the word of all the other people who have been through hell at the hands of their own family. Or do you so casually dismiss them too, just because you prefer not to believe what they say? :rolleyes:

Your lack of sense of humor is remarkable, even with the smilie you didn't manage it to catch it. Next time I'll try to place the jokes in pink letters, or send the post to Lunatic goofballs so he posts it.

And it was entirely joking. I don't deny abuse exists. However, emo culture has made it extremely common, to the point of faking.

IT got his ass kick by my sceond step dad who help mom get away from him

Why police!, we have new step dads!

How happy was your childhood? Mine was one of the deeper circles of Hell, but how did you live the first years of your life?

Thus far, I would have to say not very fun. Not very nice or happy.

Your lack of sense of humor is remarkable, even with the smilie you didn't manage it to catch it. Next time I'll try to place the jokes in pink letters, or send the post to Lunatic goofballs so he posts it.

And it was entirely joking. I don't deny abuse exists. However, emo culture has made it extremely common, to the point of faking.

Sorry, you can't back out of it now by claiming that you were joking. You walked right into it, and I'm not letting you out of it until I'm finished my victory dance. :p

Your lack of sense of humor is remarkable, even with the smilie you didn't manage it to catch it. Next time I'll try to place the jokes in pink letters, or send the post to Lunatic goofballs so he posts it.

And it was entirely joking. I don't deny abuse exists. However, emo culture has made it extremely common, to the point of faking.

Emo kids should be given something to cry about.

Sorry, you can't back out of it now by claiming that you were joking. You walked right into it, and I'm not letting you out of it until I'm finished my victory dance. :p

Remember it's only joking if the target thinks it's funny!

Why police!, we have new step dads!

oh he got it from my moms friends who are in the police force in the state mom was born when he found out we where living there

Sorry, you can't back out of it now by claiming that you were joking. You walked right into it, and I'm not letting you out of it until I'm finished my victory dance. :p

It's not even a cute victory dance. With that ad hominem crap and everything. You could have walked the Path of Laugh, and you went for the Path of Conflict.

And no, it is funny if the maker is laughing, humiliation humour is funny just because the target do not laugh.

And Imperial Isa, sorry but I cannot read and understand what you write. I suppose you took too many blows to the head back then.

Everywhere. Look around you. Read the newspapers. Hell, there's enough evidence in this thread to prove that child abuse is an unfortunately common occurrence; why can't you see it?So the few cases here and in the news are representative of all children everywhere on the planet?

So the few cases here and in the news are representative of all children everywhere on the planet?
WTF?

Many cases of child abuse are reported.

Therefore, many children are abused.

Is this so difficult a concept to grasp? It seems like you think someone has been claiming every single child in the world is abused by their parents...

WTF?

Many cases of child abuse are reported.

Therefore, many children are abused.

Is this so difficult a concept to grasp? It seems like you think someone has been claiming every single child in the world is abused by their parents...So what does "quite common" mean? How many cases out of the total number of children? Reading this thread it seems that 98% have been abused....

Well, I have four months left on my childhood before I'm turning 18. It could be described like this:

1-4: Probably good cuz I didn't understand anything that happend around me
4-13: Good-very good. I was happy and had fun. Had many friends to
13-present: Really shitty- Moved to another place. Been alone in my room since.

Well, I have four months left on my childhood before I'm turning 18. It could be described like this:

1-4: Probably good cuz I didn't understand anything that happend around me
4-13: Good-very good. I was happy and had fun. Had many friends to
13-present: Really shitty- Moved to another place. Been alone in my room since.Then go out. As simple as that. Or get a job. How old are you?

It's a deal. :)
:)






Yeah, the only positive thing I got from my childhood is that I learned what not to do as a parent.
and that's the bright side! My kids have awesome parents, because my husband and I know exactly how not to treat kids. In fact we may be better than parents who had "happy childhoods" because we go out of our way to make sure our kids feel safe, loved, and respected.

It was great up until I was about 12. After that, my parents went off the deep end with wanting me to get straight A's in school. They made me stay home all the time and study. I've only been able to go to my friend's house about 4-5 times in the last 6 years. I'm either playing computer games or on the internet while pretending to study in my room, so it isn't so bad.

Why on earth would someone beat a 2-year-old??

I got hit in the face with a baseball bat at 18 months for not eating all of my breakfast, so I guess... being wasteful.

...
And Imperial Isa, sorry but I cannot read and understand what you write. I suppose you took too many blows to the head back then.Weren't you just complaining about ad hominem crap??

Speaking as someone with 8 years professional experience in child welfare, child abuse and neglect is VERY common. I am providing a link to very good information if anyone would like to look at the real data. Now, please keep in mind that this is reported incidents. Many, many more incidents go unreported.

http://www.childwelfare.gov/systemwide/statistics/

:)







and that's the bright side! My kids have awesome parents, because my husband and I know exactly how not to treat kids. In fact we may be better than parents who had "happy childhoods" because we go out of our way to make sure our kids feel safe, loved, and respected.

Good for you, and good for your kids. I hope to do the same if I ever get to be a parent.

It was very good. No relatives died, my parents were awesome, I visited a lot of my family, cousins and friends. I´m of the older generation where I had friends in the street and we played outdoors almost all days for many hours. Yes, we played video games, but together, not through the internet, and not all the time. I used to ride my bicycle everywhere, did some stunts and got some bruises, but never any broken bone. Did a lot of shit, yet never got busted or fucked over for it.

I also traveled a lot, which is a plus. It was quite awesome.

It was very good. No relatives of my died, my parents were awesome, I visited a lot of my parents, cousins and friends. I´m of the older generation where I had friends in the street and we played outdoors almost all days for many hours. I used to ride my bicycle everywhere, did some stunts and got some bruises, but never any broken bone.

I also traveled a lot, which is a plus. It was quite awesome.

Yep, playing in the neighborhood everyday during the summer was fun even if I had nothing to do. Too bad I'm lazy now. I just sit at home all day on the computer but I still have fun.

My childhood was relatively happy for a girl who moved to the UK from the USA and then back. Nothing major happened, except the moving. My childhood was great up until I was 7.

Becuae that's when I moved to North Carolina. :(

My childhood was relatively happy for a girl who moved to the UK from the USA and then back. Nothing major happened, except the moving. My childhood was great up until I was 7.

Becuae that's when I moved to North Carolina. :(

:fluffle: :fluffle:

How happy was your childhood? Mine was one of the deeper circles of Hell, but how did you live the first years of your life?

Some good, some bad. Developing an interest in the fairer sex is not one of best memories, frankly.

:fluffle: :fluffle:

:fluffle:

North Carolina should be re-named Hell. South Carolina can just be Carolina.

Weren't you just complaining about ad hominem crap??

Yeah, but it is scientifically proven that someone abused and badly mistreated in their infancy may develop mental troubles and deficiencies, even more when we are talking about abuse as hitting someone in the head with a baseball bat. I was commenting that I, actually, cannot understand anything he has said in the last three posts, at least properly. Looks like he has either dyslexia or something related, and that could be, actually, a consequence of him taking too many blows to the head at an early age. Where is that ad hominem of yours?

And Smunkee...At 18 months? Didn't that send you to the Hospital?

I suffered psychological pressure, but not that kind of extremely raw and brutal behavior. My mother, for example, after I threw up all the soup she tried to feed me during several days, decided to make eat my own vomit, so I could learn to not vomit the soup. "So, you didn't like the soup. The soup is still in the plate, not looking as good as before, but you are not standing until you eat all the soup". I learned.

I don't see such things as abuse, they helped me to understand and also learn things. But I cannot see how someone could learn something by blows to the head.

I am also afraid of people that boost around how wonderful parents they are...Such security in doing something so delicate and totally unproven...It is better to question your methods all the time...

Yeah, but it is scientifically proven that someone abused and badly mistreated in their infancy may develop mental troubles and deficiencies, even more when we are talking about abuse as hitting someone in the head with a baseball bat. I was commenting that I, actually, cannot understand anything he has said in the last three posts, at least properly. Looks like he has either dyslexia or something related, and that could be, actually, a consequence of him taking too many blows to the head at an early age. Where is that ad hominem of yours?

And Smunkee...At 18 months? Didn't that send you to the Hospital?

I suffered psychological pressure, but not that kind of extremely raw and brutal behavior. My mother, for example, after I threw up all the soup she tried to feed me during several days, decided to make eat my own vomit, so I could learn to not vomit the soup. "So, you didn't like the soup. The soup is still in the plate, not looking as good as before, but you are not standing until you eat all the soup". I learned.

I don't see such things as abuse, they helped me to understand and also learn things. But I cannot see how someone could learn something by blows to the head.

I am also afraid of people that boost around how wonderful parents they are...Such security in doing something so delicate and totally unproven...It is better to question your methods all the time...

dyslexia
which i did not find out i had till two years after i got to go to a new school to do year 12

:fluffle:

North Carolina should be re-named Hell. South Carolina can just be Carolina.

we have a town name Hell why can't you have a state called Hell

And Smunkee...At 18 months? Didn't that send you to the Hospital?


yep, and it landed me in foster care with an abusive couple for about a week until they turned me over to my abusive aunt for 6 months, after that I went home to mom and her brand new abusive boyfriend (who was only slightly less evil than the one before)

It broke my nose and my two front teeth fell out and fractured my left cheek bone.

we have a town name Hell why can't you have a state called Hell

But then we'd have to re-name the other Carolina.

On the bright side, though, the Viriginians might start urbanizing West Virginia... re-unite the Virginias...

But then we'd have to re-name the other Carolina.

On the bright side, though, the Viriginians might start urbanizing West Virginia... re-unite the Virginias...

good point

Well, we moved around a lot- we were an Air Force family. Other than that (along with extreme lack of friends until 7th grade and the interaction with an overly friendly uncle *hint-hint*), it was just dandy.

I suffered psychological pressure, but not that kind of extremely raw and brutal behavior. My mother, for example, after I threw up all the soup she tried to feed me during several days, decided to make eat my own vomit, so I could learn to not vomit the soup. "So, you didn't like the soup. The soup is still in the plate, not looking as good as before, but you are not standing until you eat all the soup". I learned.

I don't see such things as abuse, they helped me to understand and also learn things. But I cannot see how someone could learn something by blows to the head.

I am also afraid of people that boost around how wonderful parents they are...Such security in doing something so delicate and totally unproven...It is better to question your methods all the time...

no, thats abuse. jot that down in case you think to do it to your own child some day.

making a kid eat vomit is abuse.

I would qualify mine as "very happy."

no, thats abuse. jot that down in case you think to do it to your own child some day.

making a kid eat vomit is abuse.

making a kid think that eating vomit is the act of a loving parent.....also abuse.

it took me a long time to figure out that if someone loved me they wouldn't hit me, and that if they hit me they didn't love me......way too many abusive relationships in the interim.

no, thats abuse. ...
...making a kid eat vomit is abuse.definitely. some folks should not have kids, really. and I just cannot grasp, how a victim of such abuse could express understanding...

I did get hit a few times. Nothing major, no kicks or punchs or belt beatings. Just some slaping to my butt and things like that, which I totaly deserved.

The only thing that COULD be considered abuse was once when I went skating in a hill my dad had forbiden me. He had reasons: it was very high, there were a lot of cars around, and at the botton there was this garrage where people getting out couldnt see those going down.

Anyway, I went there and fell. My right leg got completely busted. I got inside, my father saw it and asked. I said the truth, and he got a bottle of alcohol and droped the alcohol on my leg.

Now, that hurt like hell. At the moment I just thought it was a punishment. A few days latter I saw that the place did heal much faster than I had predicted it would. Then a few years latter I got an infection from a very small cut in my hand, and then I realized how easily you can get infected.

So, all in all, it did hurt, but I guess it was the best for me. My leg was completely fucked. Nowadays I consider it a teaching, even if some may consider it to be an abuse.

Yet, the vomit thing, that is disgusting.

My childhood is pretty happy right now.

My dad cheated on my mom a few years ago (four times, not once) but they're still together, so I'm happy. My parents love each others, and I get all the attention I need. I have chronic depression though, but I keep it to myself and I can get happy again with prayer and meditation. I have no friends, but I don't really have the social drive like kids my age do.

I travel a lot, so that's fun.

God has blessed me with a providing father, and a loving mother, and I couldn't ask for me. I'm really grateful.

My childhood was fairly bad, though not as bad as some others described in this thread. I was abused at home and bullied at school, which, coupled with a complete lack of friends or neighbors to confide in and a mental disorder which no one could correctly identify and for which my parents blamed me, did not exactly lead to a happy Poliwanacraca. Honestly, though, I really don't think of the physical abuse as being half so terrible as the emotional abuse. To this day, I still cry when I remember the day about 18 years ago when I finally turned on my mother and said that I would call the police if she hit me again. She answered, "Go right ahead. We'd be glad to be rid of you, but good luck finding another family. No one could ever love a worthless little brat like you."

Whee. Fun memories... :(

My childhood was fairly bad, though not as bad as some others described in this thread. I was abused at home and bullied at school, which, coupled with a complete lack of friends or neighbors to confide in and a mental disorder which no one could correctly identify and for which my parents blamed me, did not exactly lead to a happy Poliwanacraca. Honestly, though, I really don't think of the physical abuse as being half so terrible as the emotional abuse. To this day, I still cry when I remember the day about 18 years ago when I finally turned on my mother and said that I would call the police if she hit me again. She answered, "Go right ahead. We'd be glad to be rid of you, but good luck finding another family. No one could ever love a worthless little brat like you."

Whee. Fun memories... :(

Shit, that sucks. I hope you´re better now.

My childhood was fairly bad, though not as bad as some others described in this thread. I was abused at home and bullied at school, which, coupled with a complete lack of friends or neighbors to confide in and a mental disorder which no one could correctly identify and for which my parents blamed me, did not exactly lead to a happy Poliwanacraca. Honestly, though, I really don't think of the physical abuse as being half so terrible as the emotional abuse. To this day, I still cry when I remember the day about 18 years ago when I finally turned on my mother and said that I would call the police if she hit me again. She answered, "Go right ahead. We'd be glad to be rid of you, but good luck finding another family. No one could ever love a worthless little brat like you."

Whee. Fun memories... :(
:( I had one of those too. Complete with the "biggest mistake I ever made was not aborting you when I had the chance"

if it helps any, your mom was wrong. (mine too)

:( I had one of those too. Complete with the "biggest mistake I ever made was not aborting you when I had the chance"

if it helps any, your mom was wrong. (mine too)
Ouch, that's awful for a mother to say that.

Shit, that sucks. I hope you´re better now.

Well, my life is certainly better in many ways nowadays. I have wonderful friends who regularly assure me that I am, in fact, lovable, and I have enough common sense not to place a lot of faith in my mother's opinions of me. It took me a long time and a serious of relationships ranging from moderately dysfunctional to profoundly abusive before I actually managed to come to the conclusion that I am a nice person and I don't actually deserve to be treated like crap, but coming to such a conclusion late is a great deal better than never. :)

:( I had one of those too. Complete with the "biggest mistake I ever made was not aborting you when I had the chance"

if it helps any, your mom was wrong. (mine too)

It does help, and your mother was indeed wrong. Honestly, how any mother can say something like that to her child is something I'll never understand.

It does help, and your mother was indeed wrong. Honestly, how any mother can say something like that to her child is something I'll never understand.

in order for me to have any sort of relationship with her now I have to realize that she was on illicit drugs and suffering from bipolar disorder, now that she is on her meds (when she takes them) she is 100% different.

in order for me to have any sort of relationship with her now I have to realize that she was on illicit drugs and suffering from bipolar disorder, now that she is on her meds (when she takes them) she is 100% different.

Well, that's good to hear. :)

I can't help being rather amused by the contrast in our respective situations, though, insofar as I have bipolar II disorder, while my mother is fairly aggressively "normal." It's funny how similar disorders can affect people so very differently - even at my worst, I've always channelled all my rage and depression inwards, and would sooner have my hands cut off than hit a child in anger. My mentally healthy (in theory) mother, on the other hand, still firmly maintains that I deserved every nasty thing she ever said or did to me.

Well, that's good to hear. :)

I can't help being rather amused by the contrast in our respective situations, though, insofar as I have bipolar II disorder, while my mother is fairly aggressively "normal." It's funny how similar disorders can affect people so very differently - even at my worst, I've always channelled all my rage and depression inwards, and would sooner have my hands cut off than hit a child in anger. My mentally healthy (in theory) mother, on the other hand, still firmly maintains that I deserved every nasty thing she ever said or did to me.

my mom had a pretty messed up childhood of her own, probably partially because of her bipolar disorder that showed up when puberty hit (she is type II and rapid cycles off meds) so, it's not like she was coming from a healthy background to begin with, and then being high all the time is not great for BPD.

I tend to turn my anger and stuff in on myself too, which leads to all sorts of problems... luckily I have been able to find more healthy outlets as of late. :)

:( I had one of those too. Complete with the "biggest mistake I ever made was not aborting you when I had the chance"

if it helps any, your mom was wrong. (mine too)

Never got that one, but my mother did once tell me she wouldn't stop hitting me until I said that I blamed her for my disability.

Fergi America;12529409']I hated it immensely and thought it was the absolute lowest pit of Hell! But, compared to what I've learned about other people's childhoods--information I never got to see when I myself was a child (like about child abuse, etc.)--mine would actually have been one of the higher circles of Hell.

But still Hell. Such lack of empowerment...ARGH! My passing the "magic" birthday, #18, was a very good thing indeed.

A lot of frustration instantly vaporized upon the Law's recognition of my right to say NO to various lousy "family" ideas. The fact that my "YES, I'm doing it"s also have to be honored was/is equally important.
What were your family's ideas that you hated?

Awesome. There were things that could have been better, but nothing is perfect, and I like where I am right now. :)

This message has been deleted by Grainne Ni Malley. Reason: NSG is not my therapist.

Are you sure about that?

I had a very good childhood.

I had a very good childhood.Just don't tell all the depressing folks around here...

Meh...my childhood was better than a lot of the ones shown here, in that there was no physical abuse, but there was sure as hell a good deal of mental abuse.

My father used guilt as a weapon and blew things out of proportion. I once found a golf ball from a driving range in my bag after shooting some balls, and he told me that I "stole" it. It's no wonder so many people mistake accidents for criminal behavior, with idiotic behavior like that. He also told both me and my brother that no one cared about us and that no one would be upset if we died. Except our mother, whom he hated (yes, I am a product of divorce.)

My mother? A blithering idiot, a liar, and a backstabber, but that came out after I had left home. She was gay (and still is, by all acoounts) and her partner was a verbally abusive bigot who seemed to think it was OK to be gay (and mandatory, no less, at least for her "kids") but not OK to be black. She hated me especially, though she lied about it, and was an alcoholic, and for a time, my mother wised up and left her. This partner even threatened her with power tools at one point (no word on if she was actually holding them at the time) and my mother, being the Mensa member that she is, went back to her a short year later. And the bitch was still drinking. And now that I've made it clear that I want nothing to do with this bitch, my mother takes it out on - and this is really low of her - my wife.

Sorry. It just sucks to know that, though your parents care about you, they care more about making themselves look good and the other parent look bad more. It's not angering or traumatizing, but it's beyond frustrating. And it's been going on since I was 4 and my parents' (extremely nasty) divorce. Spending 13 years as a possession will create resentment.

Just don't tell all the depressing folks around here...

Why not? It's not like we "depressing people" are going to hunt him/her down and say "How dare you have had a nice childhood when I didn't?!" That would be just a wee bit odd, don't you think?

Why not? It's not like we "depressing people" are going to hunt him/her down and say "How dare you have had a nice childhood when I didn't?!" That would be just a wee bit odd, don't you think?Oh, just read through the thread, and you might get the impression that some of the depressies are doing just that.

Oh, just read through the thread, and you might get the impression that some of the depressies are doing just that.

I did read through the thread, and did not get at all that impression, but hey, believe what you want.

Oh, just read through the thread, and you might get the impression that some of the depressies are doing just that.

I'll ask you the question I asked of someone else earlier in this thead. Do you happen to have Asperger's Syndrome?

I'll ask you the question I asked of someone else earlier in this thead. Do you happen to have Asperger's Syndrome?Nope. Thanks for caring, though.

How old was your sister?

What kind of cancer?

Are you male or female? Was it abuse or outright rape?

My sister was a baby

Breast Cancer, with a full radical mastectomy when I was 4/5 years old

I am female

Rape

In more recent times, my father has disowned me and tells people I assaulted him, he lives with a much younger man who called me a whore and tried to get me arrested for kidnapping and then attempted to blackmail my father...so being grown up isn't always so great either.

My childhood was not always dreadful, I enjoyed (or so it seems to me in my memory) snow every winter, sun all summer long and never a drop of rain. I had a puppy and a horse, my own bedroom and a bike. I had friends over and got nice presents. I was a happy kid and even the bad stuff that happened did not make me an emo or a freak. It was just stuff that happened, I was not responsible for it.

Nope. Thanks for caring, though.

Well, I was just asking because I was wondering if there was a medical reason for you to be acting like a total prick, or if you were just doing it for shits and giggles.

Well, I was just asking because I was wondering if there was a medical reason for you to be acting like a total prick, or if you were just doing it for shits and giggles.what's your problem, kid? i'm not responsible for someone else's bad childhood. thanks for caring, though.

Are you sure about that?

Positive. My childhood is far too easy to go on a rant and rave about. I don't really care who knows about my personal details, but I opted to make the thread less awkward for others.

A lot of people's childhoods were absolutely miserable and mine is just another corn flake in the bowl of Sucky Krisps.

what's your problem, kid? i'm not responsible for someone else's bad childhood. thanks for caring, though.

1) I'm older than you in all likelyhood, so don't call me kid.

2) What's wrong is that I'm tired of people like you that have the sensitivity of a cactus posting on threads like this for no other purpose than to heckle people. If you can't contribute something constructive, I suggest you refrain from taking part in this discussion about things you wouldn't understand, and perhaps examine why you feel the need to cut others down.

I had a great childhood excepting the death of a close family friend who was like an older brother to me.

I always felt guilty though, because I grew up in an area where I was the only kid in my class who had happily married parents (I was one of the few who knew who their father was) and who wasn't routinely bashed and thrown out of the house (these are my primary school years). I was made to feel guilty by every person who told me that I had nothing to complain about, every teacher who told me that there were kids in the class far worse off than me, every person who told me that I should be grateful because I got presents, and had good parents. I honestly thought that I was abnormal for the longest time. I actually wanted my parents to beat me up or to divorce so that I would be "normal". It wasn't until I went to high school that I realised that I was in fact average.

I had a great childhood excepting the death of a close family friend who was like an older brother to me.

I always felt guilty though, because I grew up in an area where I was the only kid in my class who had happily married parents (I was one of the few who knew who their father was) and who wasn't routinely bashed and thrown out of the house (these are my primary school years). I was made to feel guilty by every person who told me that I had nothing to complain about, every teacher who told me that there were kids in the class far worse off than me, every person who told me that I should be grateful because I got presents, and had good parents. I honestly thought that I was abnormal for the longest time. I actually wanted my parents to beat me up or to divorce so that I would be "normal". It wasn't until I went to high school that I realised that I was in fact average.
I'm sorry people took out their problems on you. You didn't deserve that, just for having a good home life. If it makes you feel any better, I have no idea who my father was and my mother doesn't even remember who I am half the time, but I wouldn't resent you for not having the same problems.

I'm sorry people took out their problems on you. You didn't deserve that, just for having a good home life. If it makes you feel any better, I have no idea who my father was and my mother doesn't even remember who I am half the time, but I wouldn't resent you for not having the same problems.

It's not that they resented me. It was that because there were people with much, much worse problems than mine, any that I had were perceived as whining or ungratefulness. I got told constantly that there were kids who didn't get enough to eat, so I should be grateful. I felt guilty that I had all these marvellous things, like toys and clothes and multiple school uniforms (most kids only had one, that was never washed), and two parents. I felt especially guilty when I felt hard-done-by or unhappy. Which, during high school was quite often.

It's not that they resented me. It was that because there were people with much, much worse problems than mine, any that I had were perceived as whining or ungratefulness. I got told constantly that there were kids who didn't get enough to eat, so I should be grateful. I felt guilty that I had all these marvellous things, like toys and clothes and multiple school uniforms (most kids only had one, that was never washed), and two parents. I felt especially guilty when I felt hard-done-by or unhappy. Which, during high school was quite often.

Wow. That would really, really suck. I've felt unhappy a lot, but I never felt guilty about it. I can't imagine what my life would be like if I felt ungrateful for being sad about my shitty situation. In some ways, you were worse of thatn me. In other ways, you were much, much better off.

no, thats abuse. jot that down in case you think to do it to your own child some day.

making a kid eat vomit is abuse.

Well, it told me a lesson, anyway. I found it useful and I didn't, nor do I do now, consider it abuse.

But don't worry, that won't happen, (the part of me having a children), yet I think every kid should learn that they cannot eat whatever they want, whenever they want. Not just for the "obese kid" symdrome, that is so common right how in the United States, but because actually, sometimes, in some places, you just have to eat what it is in front of you, no matter what.

making a kid think that eating vomit is the act of a loving parent.....also abuse.

it took me a long time to figure out that if someone loved me they wouldn't hit me, and that if they hit me they didn't love me......way too many abusive relationships in the interim.

Noone "convinced" me it wasn't abuse, I realized it all by myself.

Luckily, noone placed a hand over me but to caress or tickle me during my childhood. I think both my parents loved me dearly, and treated me like such. I was a bit of the problem kid, yet of course, I didn't take any medication or got doped for it.

definitely. some folks should not have kids, really. and I just cannot grasp, how a victim of such abuse could express understanding...

Oh, because as opposite to most people in this thread, mostly I'm very happy with my childhood, overall, and I am pretty happy with my life and with the human being I have become, in every field. I then believe the upbringing my mother in the beginning and my father in the latter years of my infancy and teen years was a success, and that I was free enough to do whatever made me happy. If I would blame them of something, I would blame them of passing me some wrong genes.

Did they make mistakes?, yes they did, raising kids is a too much delicate issue, and everyone make mistakes, including those who think they are the perfect parents. To raise a kid, for me, is like tuning a violin, you can't let the strings too loose, and you can't tight them too much, if you expect the instrument to play the right notes.

Oh, because as opposite to most people in this thread, mostly I'm very happy with my childhood, overall, and I am pretty happy with my life and with the human being I have become, in every field. I then believe the upbringing my mother in the beginning and my father in the latter years of my infancy and teen years was a success, and that I was free enough to do whatever made me happy. If I would blame them of something, I would blame them of passing me some wrong genes.

Did they make mistakes?, yes they did, raising kids is a too much delicate issue, and everyone make mistakes, including those who think they are the perfect parents. To raise a kid, for me, is like tuning a violin, you can't let the strings too loose, and you can't tight them too much, if you expect the instrument to play the right notes.On the other hand, a child is not at all an instrument that is supposed to produce the notes desired by the parents.

Well, it told me a lesson, anyway. I found it useful and I didn't, nor do I do now, consider it abuse.

But don't worry, that won't happen, (the part of me having a children), yet I think every kid should learn that they cannot eat whatever they want, whenever they want. Not just for the "obese kid" symdrome, that is so common right how in the United States, but because actually, sometimes, in some places, you just have to eat what it is in front of you, no matter what.



Noone "convinced" me it wasn't abuse, I realized it all by myself.

Luckily, noone placed a hand over me but to caress or tickle me during my childhood. I think both my parents loved me dearly, and treated me like such. I was a bit of the problem kid, yet of course, I didn't take any medication or got doped for it.



Oh, because as opposite to most people in this thread, mostly I'm very happy with my childhood, overall, and I am pretty happy with my life and with the human being I have become, in every field. I then believe the upbringing my mother in the beginning and my father in the latter years of my infancy and teen years was a success, and that I was free enough to do whatever made me happy. If I would blame them of something, I would blame them of passing me some wrong genes.

Did they make mistakes?, yes they did, raising kids is a too much delicate issue, and everyone make mistakes, including those who think they are the perfect parents. To raise a kid, for me, is like tuning a violin, you can't let the strings too loose, and you can't tight them too much, if you expect the instrument to play the right notes.

I'm amazed you can forgive your parents like that. I haven't forgiven the man who made more than half of my life a terror, although I don't hate him. I don't really hate anyone or love anyone. I don't feel much. But to b able to hate and choose not to, I admire that.

What were your family's ideas that you hated?
Oh, nothing compared to what's come up in this thread after I made my other post in it (on page 1)!

I just hated being dragged to all the family events (recitals...at one point there were 3 active music teachers...mind you, these "recitals" were generally awful, not like getting free concerts by any stretch), being stuck going on their so-called 'vacations' that were more work than work is, etc.

It wasn't so much the "what" but the powerlessness aspect that got me. It was like being a slave. A "kind master" is far better than a mean one, but NO MASTER is the only really acceptable state, to me. The problems arose because it was also the only acceptable state to me when I was a kid!

From what I've heard others say is "just normal" and don't even gripe about, I had (and still have) an unusual lack of ability to handle those types of situations--situations where I feel trapped/disempowered in any way. Even as an adult, my high aversion to things that bring up such feelings has had a lot of impact.

Now that this thread has developed, my complaints sound pretty lame, and I can already see the "you had it goods" :p And compared to those who've suffered abuse, yeah suppose I did, in some ways (although I'll never be "grateful for the opportunity" to do stuff I didn't want to, and go places I never wanted to, like I've had suggested on occasion.).

As an adult, I can put it in better perspective, although it still sucked. It's a matter of degree. Other people having a huge mound of hog manure, doesn't make my little pile of dog manure somehow stop being manure...

My childhood surely wasn't depressing/bad 100% of the time, but the real high point for me was still when it ended!

I'm not sure I could describe it as happy, more like ignorant, considering that when I was around 13 I realised I was not happy and could not remember being happy ever.

Yeah, I was ignorant too; still am, because my counselor lady keeps telling me my childhood really wasn't a good one. I won't understand for a while, because I didn't take any of the things that happened as negative ones, except for maybe a couple. A car wreck and .. uh... parents fighting, like, twice. Out in the hall, though - never around me.

By the way, the counselor lady gets her info from my parents. Yes, I am a kid, so it makes sense.

My childhood is divided between our beautiful trip to Vermont, and being touched very inappropriately by my neighbor at age six. Two things I remember from my childhood at somehow the latter managed to make the cut. :mad:

I had two parents, neither of whom was overworked or particularly frustrated, and who both loved me to bits in their different ways. They had interesting friends who treated me like their own kid. Regular meals, my own room, a big garden and a safe, leafy suburb to roam around. A good school, a bike of my own and a lift to school if I wanted it. A little sister to feel superior to.

But get this: each year, as the six-week holiday loomed, my dad would get the four of us together and we'd choose a country to visit. We'd pack and take a plane there, backpack around SE Asia or Europe or the US, living pretty cheap but not missing a thing. At least four weeks, usually six, and sometimes trips away in the term breaks (my folks worked the school year.) It's what my parents used to do before they had us kids, and they saw no reason to stop, bless them.

So, an almost unbelievably good childhood that I remember. But I don't know much of what happened before I was about six, and sometimes I suspect there was some bad shit back about then. And of course, I was always me, limiting just how happy I could be with anything.

I had two parents, neither of whom was overworked or particularly frustrated, and who both loved me to bits in their different ways. They had interesting friends who treated me like their own kid. Regular meals, my own room, a big garden and a safe, leafy suburb to roam around. A good school, a bike of my own and a lift to school if I wanted it. A little sister to feel superior to.

But get this: each year, as the six-week holiday loomed, my dad would get the four of us together and we'd choose a country to visit. We'd pack and take a plane there, backpack around SE Asia or Europe or the US, living pretty cheap but not missing a thing. At least four weeks, usually six, and sometimes trips away in the term breaks (my folks worked the school year.) It's what my parents used to do before they had us kids, and they saw no reason to stop, bless them.

So, an almost unbelievably good childhood that I remember. But I don't know much of what happened before I was about six, and sometimes I suspect there was some bad shit back about then. And of course, I was always me, limiting just how happy I could be with anything.
That sounds really gorgeous. Wanna switch pasts some time?

if a majority of people's childhoods were as happy as the dominant culture brainwashes them into pretending they were, why then would a majority of people occlude that majority of their actual memories of it?

i did not have a "normal" childhood. i had one that was a good bit less unhappy then what i take to be average. and thus have very little to occlude. even though mine was far from privelaged. if anything, i grew up with little other then the basics. we did always have a roof and food. it was an era when one provider could insure that. many decades ago.

=^^=
.../\...

if a majority of people's childhoods were as happy as the dominant culture brainwashes them into pretending they were, why then would a majority of people occlude that majority of their actual memories of it?

i did not have a "normal" childhood. i had one that was a good bit less unhappy then what i take to be average. and thus have very little to occlude. even though mine was far from privelaged. if anything, i grew up with little other then the basics. we did always have a roof and food. it was an era when one provider could insure that. many decades ago.

=^^=
.../\...
Alas, such is no longer the case. I'm glad you had a 'less unhappy' childhood than the average. I always like to see people doing less badly.

Well, it probably lies in your opinion whether you think my 'childhood' already is over or not, after all I'm not older than 13 years; but I'd say I never had a true childhood. My parents always wanted me to be as intelligent and mature as possible... but over that they forgot that a kid needs love and affection too. They were never there for me, and after my father died when I was 11 years old, my mother started ignoring me even more. And when she actually noticed me, all she did was screaming at me and breaking me down psychically.
I became depressive, and even after the doctors told her I got BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) and my first suicide attempt, she kept her behavior.

So, talk about great childhood.

Well, it probably lies in your opinion whether you think my 'childhood' already is over or not, after all I'm not older than 13 years; but I'd say I never had a true childhood. My parents always wanted me to be as intelligent and mature as possible... but over that they forgot that a kid needs love and affection too. They were never there for me, and after my father died when I was 11 years old, my mother started ignoring me even more. And when she actually noticed me, all she did was screaming at me and breaking me down psychically.
I became depressive, and even after the doctors told her I got BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) and my first suicide attempt, she kept her behavior.

So, talk about great childhood.
You have my sympathy. I know what it's like to not have a father and have a mother who doesn't even know you're alive.

Well, it probably lies in your opinion whether you think my 'childhood' already is over or not, after all I'm not older than 13 years; but I'd say I never had a true childhood. My parents always wanted me to be as intelligent and mature as possible... but over that they forgot that a kid needs love and affection too. They were never there for me, and after my father died when I was 11 years old, my mother started ignoring me even more. And when she actually noticed me, all she did was screaming at me and breaking me down psychically.
I became depressive, and even after the doctors told her I got BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) and my first suicide attempt, she kept her behavior.

So, talk about great childhood.

I am sorry you are going through such rough stuff. You know when they say the best revenge is a life well led? they are telling the truth. Start right now getting the best grades in school, talk to your guidance counselor about what kind of schedule you need to have to take the right classes and try to work hard enough to go to a college far far away from your family. Life is better on your own sometimes, and when you get to college, work really hard so that your life can be whatever you want it to.

Well, it probably lies in your opinion whether you think my 'childhood' already is over or not, after all I'm not older than 13 years; but I'd say I never had a true childhood. My parents always wanted me to be as intelligent and mature as possible... but over that they forgot that a kid needs love and affection too. They were never there for me, and after my father died when I was 11 years old, my mother started ignoring me even more. And when she actually noticed me, all she did was screaming at me and breaking me down psychically.
I became depressive, and even after the doctors told her I got BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) and my first suicide attempt, she kept her behavior.

So, talk about great childhood.

This is going to sound really weird, given the contrast between our childhoods as related. But here goes anyway.

That's a very impressive first post. If you really are no more than 13 y-o, your parents certainly succeded in making you intelligent and mature beyond your years. I think my parents did that too, and I don't resent it now, though there were a few awkward years when I wished I could just let go and have fun like my fellow teenagers.

And then there was my twenties. They were kind of fucked-up too, I was lonely as hell but too proud to reach out to anyone. I managed to relax enough to have sex for the first time, but it took a mental institution, tricyclic antidepressants, alcohol and a very willing country girl to achieve that. I dumped her when we were discharged. Share houses in the cheapest Sydney inner-suburbs, I swapped books with friends (Dostoeyevsky for Vonnegut) and did all the drugs I could get. Any job I got I lost in matter of days, because my parents had never taught me to follow instructions. They'd taught me to think for myself and question everything.

My thirties weren't much better. I had a deadly serious relationship, I did more drugs, I travelled around Australia and lived for a few weeks at a time in the major capitals. I lived in the country. I never found a job I could stand, it always seemed like make-work, like be-busy-but-achieve-nothing. The pantheon of drugs with it's dangerous and ever-changing rituals of observance gave way to the simple convenience of walking into a shop in any town, night or day, and turning over twenty bucks for a bottle.

Now I'm 43. My material assets amount to two thousand bucks (my computers.) Despite dedicating most of my adult life to the cultivation of my soul, I still feel as though my heels are at the precipice as I struggle with my demons. Those are my demons, they grew and were nurtured in my soul, feeding on the life energy which I reserved, chose not to apply to the world. I don't want to hurt anyone, so here I am being hurt.

And you know what? I wouldn't do anything differently. If this is life, I'll take it; I'm pleased with how things are going. I'm alive in the most exciting times of recorded history, I expect to live decades more in interesting times. I still have my childhood and its curiosity, I still have my adolescence and it's uncertainty and random passions, I still have my adulthood and it's self-assurance and adult legal rights. I even have a touch of maturity, with it's responsibility and understanding of consequences. I spend a lot of time with people older than me (twice as old even) and I look forward to having what they have, a thing I dimly comprehend as yet and cannot give a name.

And I'm not sad that Kurt is dead. For the sake of the kid, it might have been better if it had been Courtney who died, but so it goes.

I'll conclude this longish core-dump from my soul with a little quote, from memory:

"The rich kid becomes a junky,
The poor kid an advertiser.
What a tragic waste of potential!
(Being a junky ain't so good either)"

This Is Serious Mum (AKA TISM) Greg, the stop sign

It could have been better. My parents were constantly fighting, usually about money and my father's girlfriends and his unwillingness to hold a job. Later, his behaviour towards me and my female friends became a subject of discussion as well (he had somewhat pedophiliac/incestuous tendencies - threatened but only partially realized).

On the other hand, a child is not at all an instrument that is supposed to produce the notes desired by the parents.

If you believe that what you do and what you don't do when raised a kid won't shape the life of your son or daughter, then you are really missing the target wide. If the influence is unavoidable, then you could try at least shape them for both them to be happy, and for you to like them.

Noone hitted me, noone abused me, Verdici, there is nothing to forgive after all.