NationStates Jolt Archive

Hello there. I've got a bit of a romantic issue that's been causing me quite a bit of mental trauma, and I was wondering if there is anyone out there who would be able to help me with it.

Still reading? Haven't bored you yet?

Okay, well here's a basic synopsis of the story: there girl at school who I fell in love with while acting with her in a school production. However, now that it's over, she hangs with her friends in her older year group, one year above me, and I don't really see much of her. I've wanted to tell her how I feel before she leaves in about five weeks, but I am afraid that will ruin whatever friendship we already have. She hasn't really made any hints that she likes me, and I don't think it's very likely anything's ever going to happen. In fact, I'm 99% sure that nothing ever will.

Does a kind soul out there have any kind of advice to give? Or are you sitting there laughing?

1. Tell her
2. Video telling her
3. Post on Youtube
4. Send us the URL

We'll better be able to assess then

Only 99%, well you'll never know for sure unless you actually talk to her about it or whatever. You never know, you could be caught completely by surprise in finding that she likes you too.

Get over it. The easiest, less complicated, solution. Also the one that probably is going to bring more happiness to those involved.

Let things go down the course, find a new crush, and enjoy it.

How often do you talk to her? Do you even know her enough to figure out if she likes you or not?

Hello there. I've got a bit of a romantic issue that's been causing me quite a bit of mental trauma, and I was wondering if there is anyone out there who would be able to help me with it.

Still reading? Haven't bored you yet?

Okay, well here's a basic synopsis of the story: there girl at school who I fell in love with while acting with her in a school production. However, now that it's over, she hangs with her friends in her older year group, one year above me, and I don't really see much of her. I've wanted to tell her how I feel before she leaves in about five weeks, but I am afraid that will ruin whatever friendship we already have. She hasn't really made any hints that she likes me, and I don't think it's very likely anything's ever going to happen. In fact, I'm 99% sure that nothing ever will.

Does a kind soul out there have any kind of advice to give? Or are you sitting there laughing?

I read the thread title and thought "A homeless Roman?"

...girl at school who I fell in love with....

School.... love.... I doubt it

School.... love.... I doubt it

Meh. As cynical as I am, I believe love comes in all forms, not just the neverending-shakespeare-wedding-vows kind of love. High school fucklove is just as much a type of love as anything other.

I know this feeling all too well, and have dealt with it in various ways in the past, not all of them good.

1. Try and ignore it in the hope that it will go away. It will eventually go away, but you'll be kicking yourself in the head forever for not doing anything about it.

2. To test how much you really like her, try and find someone else you like. If you succeed, then you didn't really like her that much and it therefore doesn't matter. If you fail, then your feelings could be much more serious.

3. Get out of your head for a while. Drink, drugs or other "displacement activities" can play a part here - but other than a lifetime supply of heroin, nothing is going to work too well.

4. Tell her how you feel. It's the only way you're ever going to know whether she likes you in that way. This doesn't have to mean an end to your friendship - but if that is the result you get, ask yourself this: If you tell a friend that you love them and they don't want to be your friend any more, what sort of a friend were they in the first place?

I know it's an unorthodox thing to say these days (and many pretentious yuppies out there would probably disagree with me on this), but I think that the best loving relationships are built on friendship - you CAN be friends with someone and in love with them at the same time.

Meh. As cynical as I am, I believe love comes in all forms, not just the neverending-shakespeare-wedding-vows kind of love. High school fucklove is just as much a type of love as anything other.

Those phrases are both a tad extreme aren't they? I still think that love starts somewhere in between the two.

Hello there. I've got a bit of a romantic issue that's been causing me quite a bit of mental trauma, and I was wondering if there is anyone out there who would be able to help me with it.

Still reading? Haven't bored you yet?

Okay, well here's a basic synopsis of the story: there girl at school who I fell in love with while acting with her in a school production. However, now that it's over, she hangs with her friends in her older year group, one year above me, and I don't really see much of her. I've wanted to tell her how I feel before she leaves in about five weeks, but I am afraid that will ruin whatever friendship we already have. She hasn't really made any hints that she likes me, and I don't think it's very likely anything's ever going to happen. In fact, I'm 99% sure that nothing ever will.

Does a kind soul out there have any kind of advice to give? Or are you sitting there laughing?

Just tell her, and if she laughs and gives ya the big fuckoffski, then count it as one o life lessons. Heh on the other hand, it may all go well, and you'll get to 'fill ya boots up, my son'

Those phrases are both a tad extreme aren't they? I still think that love starts somewhere in between the two.

*shrugs* It's different for everyone. Like I said, there are all kinds.

Forget about her. Stick to porn.

I'd say go for it, but be subtle. And don't confess that you love her... just say that you like her. Saying the other L word will only freak her out.

At any rate, just ask her out to the movies or something, just the two of you. Take things from there.

If she says no, at least you've tried and you don't have to wonder "what if?". If she says yes, then you'll maybe get to second base or something and who doesn't like boobies?

I'd advocate trying. If she's leaving in five weeks, what long term repurcussions will there be?

I'd say go for it, but be subtle. And don't confess that you love her... just say that you like her. Saying the other L word will only freak her out.

At any rate, just ask her out to the movies or something, just the two of you. Take things from there.

If she says no, at least you've tried and you don't have to wonder "what if?". If she says yes, then you'll maybe get to second base or something and who doesn't like boobies?

Hehe off topic I know, but I love the baseball/sex metaphore. I wonder why we Brits don't use Cricket terms for sexual metaphore?

I'd say go for it, but be subtle. And don't confess that you love her... just say that you like her. Saying the other L word will only freak her out.

At any rate, just ask her out to the movies or something, just the two of you. Take things from there.

If she says no, at least you've tried and you don't have to wonder "what if?". If she says yes, then you'll maybe get to second base or something and who doesn't like boobies?

Can someone explain me exactly that baseball system of the american people?

Can someone also explain me how your so called "dating system" should work?

Globalization hasn't covered that part here, yet.

Hehe off topic I know, but I love the baseball/sex metaphore. I wonder why we Brits don't use Cricket terms for sexual metaphore?

Because "he's driven her for six" doesn't sound that Romantic really.:D

Oh dear; asking for romance help on an internet message board. Still, you're young and don't know any better, so I'm sure we'll let you off! ;)

If you have this desire to "promote" (that makes it sound so business-like, haha) your friend to a potential girlfriend, you have to be CERTAIN, since by doing so you'll lose her as a friend. My friend - you are FAR from certain. She's not exactly tested the waters to see if you like her herself, has she?
I agree with Impy about friends becoming lovers, but really, if it's unrequited the other person might feel awkward, it DOES skew the friendship, after all.

I can't help but wonder if you feel this because you're pre-empting the seperation anxiety that you'll never talk again when she leaves, as if you're not friends outside of school.

Can someone explain me exactly that baseball system of the american people?

Can someone also explain me how your so called "dating system" should work?

Globalization hasn't covered that part here, yet.

First base: Kissing.

Second base: Kissing boobies.

Third base: Kissing vagina.

Home Run: Invading vagina.


I think that's how it goes. That's mine, anyway.

1. Tell her
2. Video telling her
3. Post on Youtube
4. Send us the URL

We'll better be able to assess then

Best option yet. In fact, you have nothing to lose by doing so.

First base: Kissing.

Second base: Kissing boobies.

Third base: Kissing vagina.

Home Run: Invading vagina.


I think that's how it goes. That's mine, anyway.

"Invading", that's a funny term.

"Be covered with", now I prefer that one :)

First base: Kissing.

Second base: Kissing boobies.

Third base: Kissing vagina.

Home Run: Invading vagina.


I think that's how it goes. That's mine, anyway.


And It's so much more sweeter when you do it away from home, too.

And It's so much more sweeter when you do it away from home, too.

What, a home run away from home? We call those "traveling balls". *nod*

I'd say go for it, but be subtle. And don't confess that you love her... just say that you like her. Saying the other L word will only freak her out.

At any rate, just ask her out to the movies or something, just the two of you. Take things from there.

If she says no, at least you've tried and you don't have to wonder "what if?". If she says yes, then you'll maybe get to second base or something and who doesn't like boobies?

listen to dakini, she knows stuff.

dont barge up to her and say "I WUV YOUUUU". it will only lead to immense humililation.

find her in a moment when she is not yakking with her friends and say something like "i miss seeing you every day, wanna go get a cup of coffee after school?"

then if she turns you down flat you know she isnt interested. if she does, its good.

no humiliation happens unless you have misjudged her and she is a raving bitch.

listen to dakini, she knows stuff.

dont barge up to her and say "I WUV YOUUUU". it will only lead to immense humililation.

find her in a moment when she is not yakking with her friends and say something like "i miss seeing you every day, wanna go get a cup of coffee after school?"

then if she turns you down flat you know she isnt interested. if she does, its good.

no humiliation happens unless you have misjudged her and she is a raving bitch.

And if you do decide to go up to her and say, "Wanna fuck?" make sure you post the video on YouTube.

And if you do decide to go up to her and say, "Wanna fuck?" make sure you post the video on YouTube.

I'll second that. Provided you take a strap-on out of your bag when you do.

By the way, if all else fails - come out to her as gay. Chances are she'll want a shag you should she need a baby later on in life.

Ask her out. If she says yes, problem solved. If she says no, it won't matter in 5 weeks.

Don't be a hopeless romantic. Be a hopeful romantic ;)

I'll second that. Provided you take a strap-on out of your bag when you do.

I just want to see the look on her face when he drops his pants.

I just want to see the look on her face when he drops his pants.

And she sees the alredy lubed schlong.....

Wow, all these replies only a few hours after I created this topic. Guys, I really have to thank you. In here is some great advice, as well as some hilarious stuff that I'm afraid just isn't going to happen (and how the hell would I film that without her noticing???).

Basically, I've gathered two main stances here:

1) That I should hope for the best, tell her, and see what happens.

2) That telling her directly is not the way to go.

I agree, telling her without her reciprocating the feeling would most probably skew our friendship, make it kind of awkward around each other. Basically, I have no problem telling her before she leaves, because then I have that weight off my chest, I know she knows how I feel, and if she doesn't feel the same way, then tough, I'd most likely hardly see her again.

But, if I really want a quality relationship to happen, it's probably best telling her soon, but then that brings about the skewing the friendship thing again... confusion!!!

I'm no expert (obviously), but I think I need to get a better idea of whether or not she likes me. Any subtle ways to approach this?

Not telling her anything at all was my advise, although...

If you don't say something there's a 100% chance nothing will happen.

Try this:

Buy a flower, attach it to her locker with a note, at a time just before she gets there. In the note tell her your feelings. Since school is almost up, she will either totally avoid you (if she's not interested) or she may try to get ahold of you. Doing nothing though is a great way to have nothing happen.

If you don't say something there's a 100% chance nothing will happen.

Try this:

Buy a flower, attach it to her locker with a note, at a time just before she gets there. In the note tell her your feelings. Since school is almost up, she will either totally avoid you (if she's not interested) or she may try to get ahold of you. Doing nothing though is a great way to have nothing happen.

That is probably the best solution anyway. To have nothing happen.

If she is interested in you, she would let you know, even more if she is the open type. If she hasn't, don't spoil what you have, and don't suddenly let her know that you have something in your pants pulsing and bulging for her, because that in our friends normally scare the shit out of us females when we are that young.

psh dont listen to Aelosia. Woman like risk takers. And if she says she doesn't shes lyinggggggg. Take a risk dude, be a man. Worse that will happen is she won't be interested.

psh dont listen to Aelosia. Woman like risk takers. And if she says she doesn't shes lyinggggggg. Take a risk dude, be a man. Worse that will happen is she won't be interested.

Whoah, macho crap. Women like men with self confidence, that sometimes are risk takers, we don't like meddlers or daredevils. But of course, you know more about women than women, so forget my point.

live a life of abstinence and rid yourself of all the troubles.

Inform her that you have a 10'' wing dang doodle. Then inform her that you're referring to girth, not length.

Oh, and yeah, videotape yourself doing this and post it on youtube.

Home Run: Invading vagina.

I love how you call it "invading".

If you don't say something there's a 100% chance nothing will happen.

Try this:

Buy a flower, attach it to her locker with a note, at a time just before she gets there. In the note tell her your feelings. Since school is almost up, she will either totally avoid you (if she's not interested) or she may try to get ahold of you. Doing nothing though is a great way to have nothing happen.

i wouldn't do that. just tell her, way more personal, wich is mostly better. i wouldn't advice you to say her directly you lover her, that would scare her. just ask her out to a bar or wherever you go when you're a bit to young for a bar.

I love how you call it "invading".

Makes for quite the odd metaphor to make of 300.

I'd say go for it, but be subtle. And don't confess that you love her... just say that you like her. Saying the other L word will only freak her out.

At any rate, just ask her out to the movies or something, just the two of you. Take things from there.

If she says no, at least you've tried and you don't have to wonder "what if?". If she says yes, then you'll maybe get to second base or something and who doesn't like boobies?

I approve of this advice very much. Especially the "who doesn't like boobies?" part.

i wouldn't do that. just tell her, way more personal, wich is mostly better. i wouldn't advice you to say her directly you lover her, that would scare her. just ask her out to a bar or wherever you go when you're a bit to young for a bar.

Yeah, I'm not really liking the thought of a whole mass of her friends crowding around her locker, reading the note with her, and then the following humiliation etc, you know how it is.

If only this was Switzerland, then we could go to a bar. But no.

And guys, as funny as some of your comments may be, I think some of you are kind of missing the point here. I'm not just in it for the sexy time, to quote Borat (as has been done to death), I really like this girl. If a sexy time is what follows, then I have no problem with that (after all, who doesn't like boobies?), but that's not my main objective.

I think some of you are kind of missing the point here. I'm not just in it for the sexy time, to quote Borat (as has been done to death), I really like this girl. If a sexy time is what follows, then I have no problem with that (after all, who doesn't like boobies?), but that's not my main objective.

Whatever outright lie works for you dude

If she is going to be living far away from you, you're better off staying friends. I've been in a long distance relationship for 5 years now... and it is NOT EASY.

Furthermore, I would say don't make the move, simply because you asked on the internets. If you need to ask people you don't know for advice, you aren't ready. Even if she does like you too... it's not gonna end well.

Not telling her anything at all was my advise, although...

Yes... bottle it up all in side... bottle up everything, and let it brood... and it will brood... oh yes, young one, it will brood to such a ferocity that one day you will explode in a hail of fluffy kitties, freeze-pops, and milkduds, raining all holy-hell upon the world. What a wonderful day it will be, and I shall dance!

Dance with me! Dance! Can you feel the dance!

*looks aboot*

That was hardly constructive, eh? That is all I can see happening with such efforts of bottling it up.

Furthermore, I would say don't make the move, simply because you asked on the internets. If you need to ask people you don't know for advice, you aren't ready. Even if she does like you too... it's not gonna end well.

Sorry mate, but I have to disagree with you here. I wanted to see what others thought, as this is a particular situation I haven't encountered before. I've asked close friends their opinions, and I simply wanted to widen my range of advised options.

One word: Choloroform.