NationStates Jolt Archive


Is it normal...

Shakal
19-03-2007, 04:43
Is it normal to be a virgin at 16

My question to you, the all knowing residents of NS, is this.

Is it normal to be a virgin at 16 years of age?

Personally, I am raised in two different ways, my Oma and Opa (Grandparents) are Jehovahs Witnesses and have always hinted towards me that you should wait until marraige. In this age I dont honestly believe that this is practical. (Feel free to criticize) Second is my parents, my father maintains the usual father attitude towards it, while my mother almost has a heart attack when I even joke about it.

I will make a poll for this.
IL Ruffino
19-03-2007, 04:47
You're a virgin at that age? You must be ugly.


Freak.
Europa Maxima
19-03-2007, 04:50
I'm 20 and a virgin. If being a virgin at 16 is abnormal, I'm fucked.
And no longer a virgin! :)
Deus Malum
19-03-2007, 04:51
Is it normal to be a virgin at 16

My question to you, the all knowing residents of NS, is this.

Is it normal to be a virgin at 16 years of age?

Personally, I am raised in two different ways, my Oma and Opa (Grandparents) are Jehovahs Witnesses and have always hinted towards me that you should wait until marraige. In this age I dont honestly believe that this is practical. (Feel free to criticize) Second is my parents, my father maintains the usual father attitude towards it, while my mother almost has a heart attack when I even joke about it.

I will make a poll for this.

I'm 20 and a virgin. If being a virgin at 16 is abnormal, I'm fucked.
Kyronea
19-03-2007, 04:51
I'm 20 and a virgin. If being a virgin at 16 is abnormal, I'm fucked.

Looks like we're fucked together.

Shakal: What language are the words Oma and Opa from? Also, worry not. Despite what popular culture, the typical teen, and everything around you might say, there is nothing wrong with being a virgin at any age nor is it something to be mocked or dreaded. Now, it would be useful to be experienced when it comes to love-making for the sake of relationships, but then, everyone has to start somewhere.
MrWho
19-03-2007, 04:52
I'm quite sure there is nothing wrong with being a virgin at 16. I'm 18 and I'm still a virgin. Although I've never actually tried to get laid, so that's probably why.
IL Ruffino
19-03-2007, 04:52
Careful. Wouldn't wanna offend certain people on here. ;)

The liberals?
PrincessChelsie
19-03-2007, 04:52
Yes it is normal to be a virgin when you are sixteen because you should keep it as long as possible and until you find the right person that you want to spend the rest of your life with.
Europa Maxima
19-03-2007, 04:54
You're a virgin at that age? You must be ugly.


Freak.
Careful. Wouldn't wanna offend certain people on here. ;)
Novus-America
19-03-2007, 04:54
Twenty-one here and never even been on a date.
NERVUN
19-03-2007, 04:55
I was the grand old age of 19 before I lost it (My mind I lost quite a bit earlier though), so no.
Zilam
19-03-2007, 04:55
I'm 20 and a virgin. If being a virgin at 16 is abnormal, I'm fucked.


QFT
IL Ruffino
19-03-2007, 04:55
Yes it is normal to be a virgin when you are sixteen because you should keep it as long as possible and until you find the right person that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

There's nothing wrong with casual sex.
Shakal
19-03-2007, 04:56
What language are the words Oma and Opa from?

They are German.

Oma=Grandma
Opa=Gradfather

I must honestly say that Im surprised by the replies. I thought most would be like Ruffino over there.
Kiryu-shi
19-03-2007, 04:57
Let me be the first to vote PURPLE MONKEY DISHWATER.

I lost my virginity during my 16th year. I'd say that it's certainly not abnormal to be a virgin at 16.
IL Ruffino
19-03-2007, 04:58
Nah, they belong to the cult of promiscuity as it is. I meant me, fool. :)

Buh..

I thought you were a whore?
Kryozerkia
19-03-2007, 04:59
There's nothing wrong with being a teenage virgin. I would consider it normal to be a virgin at that age, just as it's also fine not to be a virgin at that age as well. It depends on your person and if the moment is right.
Kyronea
19-03-2007, 04:59
They are German.

Oma=Grandma
Opa=Gradfather

I must honestly say that Im surprised by the replies. I thought most would be like Ruffino over there.

Ah, okay. And here I was thinking something Asian...know not do I much of languages.

Anyway, you'll find that on NationStates most are a bit more mature than your average internet forum.

Don't feel rushed, I should add. Casual sex is fine, but you shouldn't try losing your virginity just for the sake of losing it. Wait till it's right for you. And hey, if you feel sex is something to be shared between close lovers rather than casual, that's okay too. It's how I feel personally even if I have no problem with others having casual sex. It's all about what you feel is right.
Europa Maxima
19-03-2007, 05:00
The liberals?
Nah, they belong to the cult of promiscuity as it is. I meant me, fool. :)
Lunatic Goofballs
19-03-2007, 05:00
Being a virgin at 16 is normal.

NOT being a virgin at 16 is normal.

Fucking a jar of peanut butter isn't normal. :p
Deus Malum
19-03-2007, 05:00
There's nothing wrong with casual sex.

Nothing at all.
Amarenthe
19-03-2007, 05:01
Jesus. I feel old saying this, but it's going to come out regardless:

I am absolutely dismayed at our society if, at the age of 16 - MERELY 16 - one feels he or she should have already had sex.

In other words, it is completely okay and normal. Please don't feel rushed. :p
Deus Malum
19-03-2007, 05:03
Being a virgin at 16 is normal.

NOT being a virgin at 16 is normal.

Fucking a jar of peanut butter isn't normal. :p

True words of wisdom.
Poliwanacraca
19-03-2007, 05:03
Yes, it is perfectly normal to be a virgin at 16. For that matter, it's perfectly normal to be a virgin at 30. The latter may not be particularly common, but there's nothing wrong with it. Lots of people wait to have sex until they're married; lots of other people don't. Neither is objectively better than the other. The best time to lose your virginity is when it feels right to you - not when friends, pop culture, or anything else tells you you "should" do so.
Europa Maxima
19-03-2007, 05:27
Buh..

I thought you were a whore?
I'm a cocktease. :)
Kyronea
19-03-2007, 05:30
I'm a cocktease. :)

...as opposed to what? A vagina tease?
Shakal
19-03-2007, 05:30
Yes, it is perfectly normal to be a virgin at 16. For that matter, it's perfectly normal to be a virgin at 30. The latter may not be particularly common, but there's nothing wrong with it. Lots of people wait to have sex until they're married; lots of other people don't. Neither is objectively better than the other. The best time to lose your virginity is when it feels right to you - not when friends, pop culture, or anything else tells you you "should" do so.

Im lucky in that way. My friends dont pressure me at all, and pop culture...lets just say that has less effect on me than trying to sink a battleship with a flyswatter. (Although the principle involved in this truly does boggle ones mind...)
Barringtonia
19-03-2007, 05:33
Originally Posted by Lunatic Goofballs
Being a virgin at 16 is normal.

NOT being a virgin at 16 is normal.

Fucking a jar of peanut butter isn't normal.


True words of wisdom.

...apart from the peanut butter bit
Kreitzmoorland
19-03-2007, 05:35
TOTALLY normal. When I was 16 I'd never been on a date, much less had sex. At 20, I'm a happy, moderately normal non-virgin. Don't fuss.
Kyronea
19-03-2007, 05:35
Im lucky in that way. My friends dont pressure me at all, and pop culture...lets just say that has less effect on me than trying to sink a battleship with a flyswatter. (Although the principle involved in this truly does boggle ones mind...)

That's good. You should never let popular culture influance who you are and how you act.
Europa Maxima
19-03-2007, 05:41
...as opposed to what? A vagina tease?
Yes, not into girls at all. :D
Proggresica
19-03-2007, 05:42
Being a virgin at 16 is normal.

NOT being a virgin at 16 is normal.

Fucking a jar of peanut butter isn't normal. :p

Speak for yourself.

http://www.jif.com/products/images/prod_shoot.jpg
HOT!
Kyronea
19-03-2007, 05:42
Yes, not into girls at all. :D

Oh, yes, of course. My mistake.

In that case...um...look at that body builder! *flees*

Proggresica: Oh, come on...grape jelly is so much better.
Kanabia
19-03-2007, 05:48
Is it normal to be a virgin at 16 years of age?

I would assume so.
Soviet Haaregrad
19-03-2007, 06:00
I'd say it's pretty normal to to lose it anywhere between the ages of 12 and 24.
IL Ruffino
19-03-2007, 06:04
I'm a cocktease. :)

Bastard!
Soviet Houston
19-03-2007, 06:06
Is it normal to be a virgin at 16

My question to you, the all knowing residents of NS, is this.

Is it normal to be a virgin at 16 years of age?

Personally, I am raised in two different ways, my Oma and Opa (Grandparents) are Jehovahs Witnesses and have always hinted towards me that you should wait until marraige. In this age I dont honestly believe that this is practical. (Feel free to criticize) Second is my parents, my father maintains the usual father attitude towards it, while my mother almost has a heart attack when I even joke about it.

I will make a poll for this.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a virgin at 16, or with waiting till you're married before having sex.

And no longer a virgin! :)

I'm 30 years old and still a virgin... (10-second pause) ...unless you count masterbation. And yes, I know how to spell it correctly (mastUrbation); I just think it looks funnier with another "e" instead of the "u".:D

The liberals?

Forget about the @#$%*&?! liberals. They're so hypersensitive, thin-skinned, self-righteous, and easily offended that I think they need a good dose of deliberate, in-your-face, politically INcorrect speech.

Right in their faces, of course.:D
Akai Oni
19-03-2007, 06:10
I don't like to use the word "normal" with regard to sexual practices. I think it allows for perfectly harmless sexual practices to be marginalised.

Whatever is right for you is what you should be concerned with. There's nothing really to use as an objective standard.

I should hope that there's nothing abnormal about being a virgin at 16. Otherwise I'm in trouble.
Soviestan
19-03-2007, 06:27
Being a virgin at 16 is normal.

NOT being a virgin at 16 is normal.

Fucking a jar of peanut butter isn't normal. :p

ROFL! so true
Athiesta
19-03-2007, 06:31
Twenty-one here and never even been on a date.

Wow, when you say you "vow to fie a free man" - you really mean it. :p
Europa Maxima
19-03-2007, 06:41
Oh, yes, of course. My mistake.

In that case...um...look at that body builder! *flees*
Body builders aren't my thing. ;) More into models (http://www.hellomagazine.com/2003/08/07/malemodelsgallery/imgs/shaun1a.jpg).

Bastard!
You can look but don't touch. :D
Luporum
19-03-2007, 06:50
Yes it is normal to be a virgin when you are sixteen because you should keep it as long as possible and until you find the right person that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Bwahahaha!

Oh my god what a homo.
The Brevious
19-03-2007, 07:07
Is it normal to be a virgin at 16

My question to you, the all knowing residents of NS, is this.

Is it normal to be a virgin at 16 years of age?

Personally, I am raised in two different ways, my Oma and Opa (Grandparents) are Jehovahs Witnesses and have always hinted towards me that you should wait until marraige. In this age I dont honestly believe that this is practical. (Feel free to criticize) Second is my parents, my father maintains the usual father attitude towards it, while my mother almost has a heart attack when I even joke about it.

I will make a poll for this.

Nothin' wrong with being a virgin at that age ... any, really. There's occasionally a LOT wrong with perceptions of virginity/prowess, however.
Soheran
19-03-2007, 07:13
Oh my god what a homo.

:confused:
Europa Maxima
19-03-2007, 07:15
:confused:
Tantamount to saying "that's so gay." ;)
Luporum
19-03-2007, 07:17
:confused:

I always laugh when people say: "wait for the person you're going to spend the rest of your life with."

Deep down I feel I was seperated from my life partner and must mock anyone who has any such hope...*drinks*
Cabra West
19-03-2007, 07:20
Yes it is normal to be a virgin when you are sixteen because you should keep it as long as possible and until you find the right person that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Ok, that silly and dangerous advise.
While yes, it is perfectly normal to be a virgin at 16 (I was, and I was for a long time after), don't save it till marriage. Don't believe that there's going to be one single person that was meant for you, that doesn't exist. Instead , there are a good few hundred with whom you will get along and develop an emotional connection. Have sex when YOU feel it's right and want to, not when someone else tells you you should or shouldn't.

It's just as wrong to "wait until married/for the right person" as it is to have sex just because everybody else already had. Both are extremes, and both are bad ideas.
Cabra West
19-03-2007, 07:24
worst...advice...ever.

Virginity is not something to be "kept". It is not something to be "lost". Virginity is a technical term for one who has never had sex. To romanticize it as something "special" is ludicrus.

Very, VERY good point :)
Arthais101
19-03-2007, 07:27
Yes it is normal to be a virgin when you are sixteen because you should keep it as long as possible and until you find the right person that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

worst...advice...ever.

Virginity is not something to be "kept". It is not something to be "lost". Virginity is a technical term for one who has never had sex. To romanticize it as something "special" is ludicrus.
Soheran
19-03-2007, 07:29
Tantamount to saying "that's so gay." ;)

Yeah, because we all know how those damn prudish homos all faithfully wait to have sex until marriage....

:)
Soheran
19-03-2007, 07:33
Yes it is normal to be a virgin when you are sixteen because you should keep it as long as possible and until you find the right person that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Practice makes perfect.
Orlzenheimerness
19-03-2007, 07:39
:eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:
WOOOOOAAAAHHHHH!
PURPLE MONKEY DISHWASHER!?
THOSE ARE MY ALL TIME FAVOURITE WORDS...
*faints in disbelief*
Kyronea
19-03-2007, 07:50
Bwahahaha!

Oh my god what a homo.
He's a prefix meaning one or singular or same? Interesting. I didn't know someone could be a part of speech.
Terrorist Cakes
19-03-2007, 07:53
And I'm a seventeen-year-old virgin. Join the club.
Poliwanacraca
19-03-2007, 07:58
To the OP and anyone else dealing with this decision: I really hope that you take some of the advice you're getting here with a grain of salt. There will always be people convinced that the only moral choice is waiting until marriage, or that the only sensible position is to regard sex as emotionally insignificant, and that's great for them, but it really doesn't have to be great for you. I'm friends with a couple who had their first kiss on their wedding day, and they're really, really glad they waited. I'm also friends with people who have engaged in orgies with complete strangers, and they're really, really glad that they see sex as a purely casual activity. This is one of those subjects where everyone has an opinion and no one's opinion is right or wrong for anyone but themselves. The best choice you can make is the one that feels right to you, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. :)
Europa Maxima
19-03-2007, 08:03
Yeah, because we all know how those damn prudish homos all faithfully wait to have sex until marriage....

:)
Clearly you must mean those few, rare exceptions amongst us who don't choose to live a life of chastity and celibacy. ;)
Seathornia
19-03-2007, 08:10
To the OP and anyone else dealing with this decision: I really hope that you take some of the advice you're getting here with a grain of salt. There will always be people convinced that the only moral choice is waiting until marriage, or that the only sensible position is to regard sex as emotionally insignificant, and that's great for them, but it really doesn't have to be great for you. I'm friends with a couple who had their first kiss on their wedding day, and they're really, really glad they waited. I'm also friends with people who have engaged in orgies with complete strangers, and they're really, really glad that they see sex as a purely casual activity. This is one of those subjects where everyone has an opinion and no one's opinion is right or wrong for anyone but themselves. The best choice you can make is the one that feels right to you, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. :)

You just went from sex to first kiss.

Are you sure they wouldn't have enjoyed themselves more if they'd, you know, actually kissed each other more often?

And for those doing orgies.

Are you sure they wouldn't have enjoyed themselves more if they gave it a days rest in between? :p
Infinitus
19-03-2007, 08:14
I was actually raised in a different way. I went to a private school where the pressure from peers was mostly to wait until marriage. However, my parents were the ones telling me not to wait. While not necessarily encouraging random hook-ups, they didn't want me to wait until marriage because marriage is based on so many different factors.

I have actually come to realize that this is true. Marriage is not just about love; it's about compatibility, too. There are many levels of compatibility: personality, sex, work ethic, life goals, and so much more. My parents encouraged me to explore these areas before getting married so that the marriage itself would be a lasting and permanent thing. They even encouraged me to move in with someone before marriage to further test that making sure the living situation is compatible on a day-in day-out basis. They've been married for 26 years now, and are still going strong.

For a long time I went more with my peers and the wait until marriage philosophy. However, after 2 years of college I began thinking for myself and seeing things in a more objective light, as well as finally seeing what my parents were saying. I lost my virginity at age 19, and honestly, it was not eventful. Afterward I thought to myself, "that's it? That's what has everyone tied up in knots over? That's what's so controversial?" I could hardly believe it. In fact I'd categorize it as a non-event. Looking back, I was ready then. But I would not have categorized myself as ready before then. Not to say that one should go out and have lots of random sex. No, mainly because of the risk of disease and/or pregnancy. But sex is what you make of it. Many people overly dramatize it. For me, it's some combination an expression of telling someone how I feel about them and mutual pleasure.

Back to the point, don't do it until you're quite certain you're ready. For me, it would have been unthinkable at 16. However, I don't subscribe to the wait until marriage philosophy.
Poliwanacraca
19-03-2007, 08:38
You just went from sex to first kiss.

Are you sure they wouldn't have enjoyed themselves more if they'd, you know, actually kissed each other more often?

No, but they are, and it's their opinions that matter when it comes to their personal choices.

And for those doing orgies.

Are you sure they wouldn't have enjoyed themselves more if they gave it a days rest in between? :p

No, but they are, and it's their opinions that matter when it comes to their personal choices.

(Seeing a theme here?) :p

Me, I can't fathom how my absolutely-abstinent-until-marriage friends managed to keep their hands off each other during the two years of their engagement, and I don't see any appeal whatsoever in completely casual sex. But the people who made those decisions are entirely happy with them, and I find it idiotic to tell any of them that their choices were somehow wrong. I get very tired of people insisting that losing one's virginity "should" be something incredibly amazing and special, or that losing one's virginity "should" be totally insignificant, or anything in between; all that possibly accomplishes is making people who disagree feel pressured to do things that don't suit them.
Anti-Social Darwinism
19-03-2007, 09:08
There's nothing wrong with casual sex.

There's nothing wrong with abstinence either. What's wrong is when people start trying to make others feel like outsiders because they are doing what's right for them.

People should just relax and be what they are. Trying to fit in with another's idea of what is appropriate is silly.
Rotovia-
19-03-2007, 09:19
Anything preceded with 'is it normal to'...is not
Divine Imaginary Fluff
19-03-2007, 09:49
Anything preceded with 'is it normal to'...is notIs it normal to exist?
Hamilay
19-03-2007, 09:50
Is it normal to exist?
Do you know how many people don't exist? There's far too many to count. :p
Imperial isa
19-03-2007, 09:52
you lose when you lose, i lost it at 13
Divine Imaginary Fluff
19-03-2007, 09:54
Do you know how many people don't exist? There's far too many to count. :pVery well, then; is it normal to either exist, not exist, or do both at the same time?
The Infinite Dunes
19-03-2007, 10:31
Whether I'm a virgin depends upon your definition of the word.They are German.

Oma=Grandma
Opa=Gradfather

I must honestly say that Im surprised by the replies. I thought most would be like Ruffino over there.Really? Opa means 'elder/respected sister' in the Persian languages. And something that sounds quite like Oma means 'elder/respected brother' - I think.
Ex Libris Morte
19-03-2007, 10:41
I lost it at the tender age of 14 to a girl who later informed me that the rash I developed was "normal"

Yay for crabs!
Luporum
19-03-2007, 10:42
The first kiss has some meaning, but sex is just sex no matter how much you try to romanticize it. No matter how many candles you light both people just end up acting like animals.
IL Ruffino
19-03-2007, 10:48
I lost it at the tender age of 14 to a girl who later informed me that the rash I developed was "normal"

Yay for crabs!

You get a rash when you have crabs?
Ex Libris Morte
19-03-2007, 10:54
I did because I'm allergic.
I V Stalin
19-03-2007, 10:54
Fucking a jar of peanut butter isn't normal. :p
At 16, or at any age?
Cabra West
19-03-2007, 11:01
At 16, or at any age?

Somebody once told me a story about a Calzone Pizza... you know, the ones that you fold over?
Risottia
19-03-2007, 11:08
Yes it is normal to be a virgin when you are sixteen because you should keep it as long as possible and until you find the right person that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

No. It is normal to be a virgin until you find a person you really like, trust and possibily love. The "spend the rest of your life with" part is utter nonsense- leaving out religious issues, that is. But why has this religion thingie always to spring up, expecially when people are talking about sex?

Sometimes I have the impression that religions are most of the time about "do not fuck unless I approve" than about "try to be a nice person".
Risottia
19-03-2007, 11:10
Somebody once told me a story about a Calzone Pizza... you know, the ones that you fold over?

It's called a "calzone". Not a "calzone pizza". Try asking any italian waiter for a "calzone pizza" and very probabily you'll get a calzone AND a pizza. Mmmhhh... that's an idea.
Philosopy
19-03-2007, 11:15
Is it normal to be a virgin at 16

Normal? It's something to be encouraged.

At the end of the day what's right will be unique to you, but don't feel that you should be doing things because that's what's 'normal'. A lot of people really mess up their lives by having sex before they're ready for it. Do it because you're comfortable, not because you feel you 'ought' to.
Cameroi
19-03-2007, 11:35
it is equaly "normal" to be a virgin or nonvirgin at almost any age.
so i wouldn't worry too much about it.
opportunities happen when they do and when they don't they don't.

i felt that life had shafted me, and still do, when i was still a virgin at 13.

sadly i was still one at 20! but fortunately not for much longer after that.

society needs for people to have and enjoy sex, but it doesn't need a more crowded world. there's no shortage of humans. by about 20 times too many of us for optimal ecological balance.

the only rational reconciliation of these two realities that i can see is to somehow lower all human firtility accross the board without bias or exception.

hopefully the day will come when either more people see it that way, or nature is somehow able to intervien to bring this about in some less then totaly painful and draconic a manor.

i wish you huggs and happiness and good fortune.

=^^=
.../\...
Cabra West
19-03-2007, 11:48
It's called a "calzone". Not a "calzone pizza". Try asking any italian waiter for a "calzone pizza" and very probabily you'll get a calzone AND a pizza. Mmmhhh... that's an idea.

I know, I know. I called it that for the benefit of the US posters, mostly.
Lunatic Goofballs
19-03-2007, 11:49
Originally Posted by Lunatic Goofballs
Being a virgin at 16 is normal.

NOT being a virgin at 16 is normal.

Fucking a jar of peanut butter isn't normal.




...apart from the peanut butter bit

Oh, especially the peanut butter bit.
Lunatic Goofballs
19-03-2007, 11:50
Speak for yourself.

http://www.jif.com/products/images/prod_shoot.jpg
HOT!

Hey, I didn't say it wasn't fun, I just said it wasn't normal. :p
Lunatic Goofballs
19-03-2007, 11:52
At 16, or at any age?

Exactly. *nod*
SimNewtonia
19-03-2007, 14:12
Twenty-one here and never even been on a date.

Wow, I thought I was the only one.

:eek:
Smunkeeville
19-03-2007, 14:52
Is it normal to be a virgin at 16

My question to you, the all knowing residents of NS, is this.

Is it normal to be a virgin at 16 years of age?

Personally, I am raised in two different ways, my Oma and Opa (Grandparents) are Jehovahs Witnesses and have always hinted towards me that you should wait until marraige. In this age I dont honestly believe that this is practical. (Feel free to criticize) Second is my parents, my father maintains the usual father attitude towards it, while my mother almost has a heart attack when I even joke about it.

I will make a poll for this.

you should wait until you feel emotionally and mentally ready to have sex, if that's at 17 or 27 it doesn't matter. don't worry about being "normal", you should do what's right for you.
Johnny B Goode
19-03-2007, 14:55
Is it normal to be a virgin at 16

My question to you, the all knowing residents of NS, is this.

Is it normal to be a virgin at 16 years of age?

Personally, I am raised in two different ways, my Oma and Opa (Grandparents) are Jehovahs Witnesses and have always hinted towards me that you should wait until marraige. In this age I dont honestly believe that this is practical. (Feel free to criticize) Second is my parents, my father maintains the usual father attitude towards it, while my mother almost has a heart attack when I even joke about it.

I will make a poll for this.

In my opinion, perfectly. In my town, sex doesn't usually start until 15, and that's pretty young from what I've heard. I'm 13, and I've never kissed anyone other than my mom. Of course, I can't remember kissing my mom either...
Dishonorable Scum
19-03-2007, 15:09
It is neither normal nor abnormal to be a virgin at any age past puberty. Don't sweat it. If you're inclined to be sexually active, then sooner or later you'll find someone who want to be sexually active with you. If you're not so inclined - don't worry about it. It's a perfectly legitimate choice. Either way it's not worth obsessing about. Relax, concentrate on finding someone you want to have sex with instead of concentrating on just having sex, and one day it will all work out.

(Says a 41-year-old married man. But yeah, I was once a severly horny teenaged virgin. And I remember what it was like.)

:D
Giant Kitty
19-03-2007, 15:41
Well I'm 23, still a virgin, and I'm generally ok with that. I tend to be the wait until marriage type, partly because I was raised that way and partly just because I think it's a good idea. But wait until marriage or not, I could never have casual sex with just anyone. For me to even think about sex, I have to care about the other person a pretty good bit. And I know if I already care about someone, sex is just going to make me more attached. There's really only one or two people I've ever really thought about having sex with, but it would be so hard for me to just walk away and have the relationship continue on as before. I think it's up to the individual to decide when to lose their virginity but there's a lot to consider and I wouldn't do it just because.
Newer Kiwiland
19-03-2007, 16:24
I'm amazingly relieved by the number of 'Yes'....
Bottle
19-03-2007, 16:27
Is it normal to be a virgin at 16

My question to you, the all knowing residents of NS, is this.

Is it normal to be a virgin at 16 years of age?

Sure. Why not?

I know this is a radical idea, but have sex when you want to have sex.

The person who decides when you have sex should be YOU. Not Oma and Opa. Not Mom and Dad. Not God, or priests, or nuns or monks. Not teachers. Not friends. Not relatives. Not boyfriend or girlfriend. Not MTV, not Fox, not Cosmo or Maxim. Not the Bible or Playboy.

Other people may have good information to share with you. It is good to listen and to learn from others. It is bad, horrible, wrong, completely and totally crappy to have other people make your sex decisions for you. It is bad, horrible, wrong, completely and totally crappy to make your sex decisions based on what OTHER people want from you.

Have sex when you feel it is right for you. When it is what you want to do, and what you feel is right for you. Trust yourself and your judgment. Respect yourself by thinking about sex seriously and clearly and honestly. Respect your body by learning how to take care of it, and accept that it is a good thing to want to be healthy and feel good.
The Infinite Dunes
19-03-2007, 16:38
What surprises me about this thread is the low take up of the joke options. People must take this issue very seriously.
Smunkeeville
19-03-2007, 16:39
Sure. Why not?

I know this is a radical idea, but have sex when you want to have sex.

The person who decides when you have sex should be YOU. Not Oma and Opa. Not Mom and Dad. Not God, or priests, or nuns or monks. Not teachers. Not friends. Not relatives. Not boyfriend or girlfriend. Not MTV, not Fox, not Cosmo or Maxim. Not the Bible or Playboy.

Other people may have good information to share with you. It is good to listen and to learn from others. It is bad, horrible, wrong, completely and totally crappy to have other people make your sex decisions for you. It is bad, horrible, wrong, completely and totally crappy to make your sex decisions based on what OTHER people want from you.

Have sex when you feel it is right for you. When it is what you want to do, and what you feel is right for you. Trust yourself and your judgment. Respect yourself by thinking about sex seriously and clearly and honestly. Respect your body by learning how to take care of it, and accept that it is a good thing to want to be healthy and feel good.

*prints this post*

sorry, but I have been telling this to a girl for ages, she thinks I say it because of my "puritanical values", I can print this and some of your other posts and maybe she will listen........
Snafturi
19-03-2007, 16:43
Totally normal. I lost mine at 17. I didn't have any of the emotional connection to my first time. I'd decided I wanted to lose it so I found someone to take it. Everything was well after.
Brutland and Norden
19-03-2007, 16:46
Twenty-one here and never even been on a date.
Wow, I thought I was the only one.

:eek:

Is there a club for people like us?
Newer Kiwiland
19-03-2007, 16:48
Is there a club for people like us?

I feel a fear lurking nearby that this is it....

Nah I think/hope that this is quite normal :D
Intangelon
19-03-2007, 16:49
Put simply, the answer to the OP's question is:
YES.

I was a virgin until I was 21. I saw all the drama sex caused among my friends and peers and, aside from being tactless and homely, I decided it wasn't worth all the energy just to get laid.

Really, it isn't all that it's built up to be. It's great, don't get me wrong, but there's an inordinate amount of attention paid to the whole concept of virginity, from religion to popular culture. It's an obsession, frankly, and it's not healthy. When you're ready, you'll know, and if either one of you ISN'T, the other needs to understand and respect that.
Bottle
19-03-2007, 16:52
*prints this post*

sorry, but I have been telling this to a girl for ages, she thinks I say it because of my "puritanical values", I can print this and some of your other posts and maybe she will listen........
I've been constantly shocked by the number of people who regard these sentiments as radical or revolutionary. The idea that people should have sex when they want to have sex is, apparently, a really nutty notion.

We're all supposed to deny ourselves things, I guess. We're supposed to make sure we don't use our bodies the way we want to, because that would be selfish. Instead, our bodies exist to be used by others. Maybe it's men who are supposed to use our bodies for us. Maybe God owns our bodies and is supposed to use them for us. Maybe we have a duty to The Fatherland to use our body for the service of our country. Maybe we're supposed to use our bodies to serve our racial or ethnic group.

But whatever form the designated owners may be, the constant is that we do not own our bodies. We are NOT supposed to simply use them as we believe they should be used. We are NOT supposed to use our own judgment to decide what is best for us, as individuals.

Fuck that noise, I always say.
Hamturwinske
19-03-2007, 17:33
Well, I'm 16 and a virgin, too, but it's definately not for any religious reason.
Harlesburg
20-03-2007, 09:12
Is it normal to be a virgin at 16

My question to you, the all knowing residents of NS, is this.

Is it normal to be a virgin at 16 years of age?

Personally, I am raised in two different ways, my Oma and Opa (Grandparents) are Jehovahs Witnesses and have always hinted towards me that you should wait until marraige. In this age I dont honestly believe that this is practical. (Feel free to criticize) Second is my parents, my father maintains the usual father attitude towards it, while my mother almost has a heart attack when I even joke about it.

I will make a poll for this.
At the needless expense of bumping this, i say yes.
Nova Boozia
20-03-2007, 09:15
Well, I'm thirteen, so I'm in no position to comment. But I like pressing buttons, so:

Purple Monkey Dishwasher! Huzzah!
Gaithersburg
20-03-2007, 09:20
From what I've heard from my friends, sex has just way too much drama for me to deal with at this point in my life. 18, by the way.
Fachistos
20-03-2007, 10:54
Wow, I thought I was the only one.

:eek:

Perhaps you should meet each other? ;)
Kiryu-shi
20-03-2007, 14:51
I know, I know. I called it that for the benefit of the US posters, mostly.

There be calzones in the U.S.
Bottle
20-03-2007, 16:59
From what I've heard from my friends, sex has just way too much drama for me to deal with at this point in my life. 18, by the way.
Abstaining from sex doesn't insulate you against drama. Romantic relationships create drama, regardless of whether or not you're actually fucking. It's true, there are a lot of people who choose to make sex a point of drama, but I strongly advise against ever sleeping with that sort. It's like living in an episode of Melrose Place before too long.
Letila
21-03-2007, 16:17
In my area, at least, it's certainly unusual as far as I know, though admittedly, I don't know well enough to be sure. I am still a virgin at 19, but that is due to my Aspergers syndrome, which takes away my ability to interact socially with any degree of success. If you aren't hindered by that, then by all means don't let outdated pleasure-phobic rules hold you back.
The Treacle Mine Road
21-03-2007, 17:16
I'm 16, a virgin and never been on a date. It doesn't bother me a great deal, the world is full of female geeks and nerds, handy for me that. In have dyspraxia but I don't believe it affects me a huge deal socailly, not any more at any rate.
Proggresica
21-03-2007, 17:56
Bart:Now for Operation Strike-Make-Go-Longer. You know, I heard Skinner say the teachers will crack any minute.
Teacher: Skinner said the teachers will crack any minute purple monkey dishwasher.
Edna: Well! We'll show him, especially for that "purple monkey dishwasher" remark.

One of my favourite Simpsons lines ever.
Drunk commies deleted
21-03-2007, 18:19
Don't worry. It's not all about sex.

http://www.moviewavs.com/php/sounds/?id=gog&media=MP3S&type=Movies&movie=40_Year_Old_Virgin&quote=justpleasestop.txt&file=justpleasestop.mp3
Kanabia
21-03-2007, 19:07
Wow, I thought I was the only one.

:eek:

Is there a club for people like us?

We should start one. :p
Andaluciae
21-03-2007, 19:09
Very much so.

I was a virgin at sixteen, and am still one at 21, entirely by choice. It's not a religious deal with me...I just haven't gotten to the point in a relationship where I would feel comfortable with taking that step.
Bottle
21-03-2007, 21:29
Very much so.

I was a virgin at sixteen, and am still one at 21, entirely by choice. It's not a religious deal with me...I just haven't gotten to the point in a relationship where I would feel comfortable with taking that step.
Hmm, this raises an interesting question for me:

How many people here deliberately chose to wait until they were in a serious relationship before having sex? How many people deliberately chose to have sex with somebody they were NOT in a relationship with? How many people just did it when it was convenient?

Myself, I specifically chose to have sex the first time with a person I was not dating and for whom I did not have any particularly romantic feelings. We had great physical chemistry and a great friendship (which still persists today), but there was no interest in a romantic relationship.
Europa Maxima
22-03-2007, 01:10
In my area, at least, it's certainly unusual as far as I know, though admittedly, I don't know well enough to be sure. I am still a virgin at 19, but that is due to my Aspergers syndrome, which takes away my ability to interact socially with any degree of success. If you aren't hindered by that, then by all means don't let outdated pleasure-phobic rules hold you back.
What is it exactly about AS that makes it so hard to interact with others? As I said before, I think I have it, but I'm just curious what causes it. Or is this still a mystery?
Luipaard
22-03-2007, 01:21
Its not abnormal at all, its probably more abnormal NOT to be a virgin at 16. Yes, i wasnt a virgin at 16 but i was damn close! (i just couldnt wait that extra 4 days). Most of my friends from school are still virgins tho and they are all 18/19.