NationStates Jolt Archive

As Dempublicents was being sexist and narrow-minded (and possibly a few other people, though generally not)* in my post related to the father who couldn't help a kid because of his worries about being branded a paedophile, I've decided to make this poll.

What would you think if you looked out of your window, saw a girl whom you knew crying in the street, and a man whom you didn't know stood in front of her asking her to get into his car?

*Note that most people disagreed with the general theme of your posts - doesn't that tell you something? Nope? Didn't think so.

Depends, what's the girl crying about?

BTW, starting a thread just to attack another poster is bad juju.

in my post related to the father who couldn't help a kid because of his worries about being branded a paedophile, I've decided to make this poll.

How would you react if you looked out of your window, saw a girl whom you knew crying in the street, and a man whom you didn't know stood in front of her asking her to get into his car?



I would head out and find out why she was crying.
I would take down his licence plate number and make/model of car.

and I would try to strike a friendly conversation with him. I would be polite to him.

Um, Dempublicents wasn't being sexist.

A child I know is crying - this concerns me.

There is no one that I know who is around to find out why the child is crying - this concerns me also.

I wouldn't immediately jump to the conclusion that the person is a paedophile. There are many other things that the adult good be. Some good, some bad. So it would be silly to jump to a conclusion.

I would, however, be less concerned if there adult was had another child with him or her who seemed content, but I's still wander over to find out was happening.

edit: your grammar is quirky in the poll. I'd normally put the 'NOT' before 'paedophile' and not 'think'.

It'd depend on the situation. Thankfully people communicate lots & lots thru bodylanguage, so unless the guy was a paedo, the thought would likely never cross my mind.

Well seeing as the guy is asking her to get in his car I would be like “zomg kidnap” and probably go and find out what’s going on

I would probably have some nightmarish image of the man in my head but other than that I’d be a rational guy who is pissed off with bloody kids on my lawn

It'd depend on the situation. Thankfully people communicate lots & lots thru bodylanguage, so unless the guy was a paedo, the thought would likely never cross my mind.

how would a Pedo move?

how would a Pedo move?

Generally, like anyone else. Real paedos don't look or act like what people may think they look or act like (dodgy looking people hanging around near playgrounds) - they look like nice charming men/women who may even be happily married with kids. According to statistics, most victims of paedophiles are related to the abuser.

It would probably be best to shoot them both just to make sure I reckon.

Generally, like anyone else. Real paedos don't look or act like what people may think they look or act like (dodgy looking people hanging around near playgrounds) - they look like nice charming men/women who may even be happily married with kids. According to statistics, most victims of paedophiles are related to the abuser.

I know.. but the way Sim posted, sounds like he could tell a pedo by the way he moves. :p

If I see something that looks suspicious or unusual enough to warrant my attention, I take a 'mental picture' of what's going on. I note what people are wearing, my location, their location, distinguishing characteristics and the time. That way, if I hear that something happened, I can call the police and the information I can provide can help. I don't automatically jump to the conclusion that a crime is being committed. I'm not a detective.

But then again, when the hell did I become the voice of reason?!? :D

But then again, when the hell did I become the voice of reason?!? :D

Well, if we assert that the world is mad (which seems reasonable), and you are madder than most, maybe you went all the way out of the other side?

The poll is flawed, but I voted option one. If I knew the girl and there was a stranger there telling her to get into his car I wouldn't necessarily think he was a pedaphile but I would be concerned that he may be up to something.

how would a Pedo move?Like Michael Jackson :D

In my experience, people usually don't intimidate their crying children, especially not if the children are already cowering. What I meant above is that unless it was somehow obvious the guy's a paedo, I'd never assume anything of the sort. Unfit for being a parent, perhaps, but that's about it. Then again, I don't need to know the nature of what a guy's up to, if it's clear he's up to no good.
And if it isn't clear, why would I intervene?

EDIT:I know.. but the way Sim posted, sounds like he could tell a pedo by the way he moves. I actually meant just the opposite. The OP makes it sound like it's a perfectly normal thing to suspect any male near any child of being a paedophile. I disagree. Hell, I'm inclined to think that sort of mentality says more about the OP than anything else.

Well, if we assert that the world is mad (which seems reasonable), and you are madder than most, maybe you went all the way out of the other side?

I flipped the game! :eek:

I'd get the registration of his car and get a good look at the bloke and the girl. Then if he did kidnap her I would have a top chance of getting any reward money offered by the police for information leading to an arrest!

I'd be quids in and hopefully the girl wouldn't end up with her skin all off.

Like Michael Jackson :D the Crotch grab is finally revealed!

EDIT:I actually meant just the opposite. The OP makes it sound like it's a perfectly normal thing to suspect any male near any child of being a paedophile. I disagree. Hell, I'm inclined to think that sort of mentality says more about the OP than anything else.The OP is trying to find out how many people will think Pedo at that situation. that's all.

considering that a kidnapper is not always a pedo... I put no. now if it asked if you thought the male was up to no-good...

I flipped the game! :eek:
:eek: You flipped something!

I know.. but the way Sim posted, sounds like he could tell a pedo by the way he moves. :p
Great. Now I've got "Something in the way she moves" going round in my head.

I would probably check on the girl to see why she was crying. I would be a little suspicious, but not because I'd think he's a paedophile, but because I'd be protective of the girl. Odds are he is probably just doing the same thing I'm doing: checking on her. Still, if he isn't...that's why I carry around the quality quarterstaff my parents got me for my birthday last year as a "walking stick." Let's me get away with taking it everywhere and I never have to worry about defending myself with that thing.

I carry around the quality quarterstaff my parents got me for my birthday last year as a "walking stick." Let's me get away with taking it everywhere and I never have to worry about defending myself with that thing.
Unless he has a gun of course.

Or is a lvl 12 Mage.

In today's world, assuming gets people into the most trouble and leads to lawsuits. Rather than simply assuming that the person will do harm, and yes, women can harm a child (as past trials have shown) and men are sometimes wrongly portrayed as a paedo simply for being concerned, it's better to be active and show the same level of concern by going over to the same child and making sure it's ok.

Unless he has a gun of course.

Or is a lvl 12 Mage.

You've never seen me weild my quarterstaff. I'm a bit too fast for someone to pull out a gun on me, especially if I'm already at close range, which I would be in this instance.

That said, if he was intentionally kidnapping her, he'd probably have the gun out already and I'd be screwed, but that wasn't the question asked in the original post. In the original post, the man is just asking the girl into his car. He isn't doing anything overt nor does he seem to be packing a weapon.

The poll is flawed, but I voted option one. If I knew the girl and there was a stranger there telling her to get into his car I wouldn't necessarily think he was a pedaphile but I would be concerned that he may be up to something.

Precisely.

I don't think I'd assume he's a paedophile, but I think I'd go out and see what's going on.

What would you think if you looked out of your window, saw a girl whom you knew crying in the street, and a man whom you didn't know stood in front of her asking her to get into his car?

If I knew her and I did not know him, I would go outside and ask what was going on.

I'd go and see what's wrong. If I couldn't, I'd note the license plate and car color, at least.

I would grab my cell phone and walk out onto the street and ask both what was going on, depending on the situation I would:

A: If both their stories match, I would offer to call the police to come pick up the girl, and stick with them until they arrived.

OR

B: If the man somehow insisted that she come with him, I would try to stop or stall him, and if that failed (I wouldn't let it, but hypothetically speaking) I would take down his LP number and call the cops.

As Dempublicents was being sexist and narrow-minded (and possibly a few other people, though generally not)* in my post related to the father who couldn't help a kid because of his worries about being branded a paedophile, I've decided to make this poll.

What would you think if you looked out of your window, saw a girl whom you knew crying in the street, and a man whom you didn't know stood in front of her asking her to get into his car?

*Note that most people disagreed with the general theme of your posts - doesn't that tell you something? Nope? Didn't think so.

I'd listen to in see what was going on.

I'd listen to in see what was going on.

Or, you could go out there and ask.

Or, you could go out there and ask.
*nods*

if he is not planning Ill will towards the child, you can get the information you need (why is the girl crying.) Especially when he finds out that you know her and she knows you.

if he IS planning ill will towards the child, your presence may chase him off. if he does stay to try and con you, you will gain information that will lead to his arrest.

As Dempublicents was being sexist and narrow-minded (and possibly a few other people, though generally not)* in my post related to the father who couldn't help a kid because of his worries about being branded a paedophile, I've decided to make this poll.

What would you think if you looked out of your window, saw a girl whom you knew crying in the street, and a man whom you didn't know stood in front of her asking her to get into his car?

*Note that most people disagreed with the general theme of your posts - doesn't that tell you something? Nope? Didn't think so.

I'd grab my cell and call the police. Then would approach the man and tell him what I've done.

If I've seen a girl crying in the street, I would NOT try to convince her to get into my car (even if I had one), I'd also call the police and tell them there is a lost girl.

what i would do would depend on if he is asking or shoving.

if i saw a little girl i knew crying "in" the street with a man offering her a ride. i would go talk to her to find out what was wrong. i wouldnt assume he was a pedo unless she seemed to be trying to get away from him. (assuming i would know her relatives too). i would figure that i could calm her down better than a stranger could and that he would rather pass responsibility for this child onto someone who knew her so that he could go on his way knowing he had done the right thing.

if i saw a girl in the street crying and trying to get away from a man i had never seen before, i would call 911, take down his licenseplate number and call her name so he would know he was being watched. its not like this kind of thing hasnt happened in my town before.

how would a Pedo move?

Obviously with slinking movements while curling their pedo-stache.

As Dempublicents was being sexist and narrow-minded (and possibly a few other people, though generally not)* in my post related to the father who couldn't help a kid because of his worries about being branded a paedophile, I've decided to make this poll.

:confused: Suddenly, NOT being sexist equates to being "sexist and narrow-minded"? Darling, I think you are a bit confused. I was pretty much the only person regularly participating in the thread who wasn't expressing sexist ideas. And most of those who weren't were basically saying that the majority of people in general are stupid.

What would you think if you looked out of your window, saw a girl whom you knew crying in the street, and a man whom you didn't know stood in front of her asking her to get into his car?

I'd think that the situation was strange, and that I should investigate further. Of course, I would think the same thing if I saw a young child I knew crying in the street and a strange woman seemed to be trying to get in her car.

Of course, this has little to do with the old topic.

*Note that most people disagreed with the general theme of your posts - doesn't that tell you something? Nope? Didn't think so.

People disagreed with me by saying that most people are sexist assholes. Forgive me if I give the majority of the human race a little more credit.

snip

QFT on every point. As a lurker in that thread, it seemed to me Dem was basically as much the opposite of sexist as you could be.

I'd grab my cell and call the police. Then would approach the man and tell him what I've done.

What, immediately, without checking out the situation first? That seems a little absurd, and belies an assumption that any man engaging with a child has designs on her, sexually. Which is equally as absurd.

Try answering this:

What would you think if you looked out of your window, saw a girl whom you knew crying in the street, and a woman whom you didn't know stood in front of her asking her to get into her car?

As Dempublicents was being sexist and narrow-minded (and possibly a few other people, though generally not)* in my post related to the father who couldn't help a kid because of his worries about being branded a paedophile, I've decided to make this poll.

What would you think if you looked out of your window, saw a girl whom you knew crying in the street, and a man whom you didn't know stood in front of her asking her to get into his car?

*Note that most people disagreed with the general theme of your posts - doesn't that tell you something? Nope? Didn't think so.
To be honest first thought with that situation was probably a father disciplining his daughter, or shortly there after

i would not think he was 'probably a paedophile' but i would go over to see if i too could be of help to the kid.

What, immediately, without checking out the situation first? That seems a little absurd, and belies an assumption that any man engaging with a child has designs on her, sexually. Which is equally as absurd.

Try answering this:

What would you think if you looked out of your window, saw a girl whom you knew crying in the street, and a woman whom you didn't know stood in front of her asking her to get into her car?

Same as with the guy -- I'd go outside and see what was up. And offer to call the cops or her parents as appropriate.

What, immediately, without checking out the situation first? That seems a little absurd, and belies an assumption that any man engaging with a child has designs on her, sexually. Which is equally as absurd.

Try answering this:

What would you think if you looked out of your window, saw a girl whom you knew crying in the street, and a woman whom you didn't know stood in front of her asking her to get into her car?

So what? Worst case scenario, cops come and there is an interesting scene. And they let the man and child go after couple questions. It's actually the best case scenario, better to be safe than sorry. Besides, how can I investigate the situation?

If the child is not offering any resistance, that doesnt mean the guy is her parent. Children may be non-violently deceived.

It's much more likely that a crying child will also get into his/her parents car and continue crying there rather than being tried to be persuaded to get in while crying on a street, even if the problem lies on the child, like s/he's trying to have his/her parents buy a toy. Besides crying children usually indicate bad parents. So I wouldnt feel bad about calling the cops in any case.

And yeah, I'm more biased against men and I am male. It's quite logical to be more cautious given almost all rapes are committed by men.

So what? Worst case scenario, cops come and there is an interesting scene. And they let the man and child go after couple questions. It's actually the best case scenario, better to be safe than sorry. Besides, how can I investigate the situation?

If the child is not offering any resistance, that doesnt mean the guy is her parent. Children may be non-violently deceived.

It's much more likely that a crying child will also get into his/her parents car and continue crying there rather than being tried to be persuaded to get in while crying on a street, even if the problem lies on the child, like s/he's trying to have his/her parents buy a toy. Besides crying children usually indicate bad parents. So I wouldnt feel bad about calling the cops in any case.

And yeah, I'm more biased against men and I am male. It's quite logical to be more cautious given almost all rapes are committed by men.
Crying kids indicate bad parents WTF?

Maybe the kid just tripped? oh wait they MUST be bad parents! :rolleyes:

Crying kids indicate bad parents WTF?

Maybe the kid just tripped? oh wait they MUST be bad parents! :rolleyes:

Notice *usually* :rolleyes:

So what? Worst case scenario, cops come and there is an interesting scene. And they let the man and child go after couple questions. It's actually the best case scenario, better to be safe than sorry. Besides, how can I investigate the situation?

OK, the cops come, the man turns out to be entirely innocent. Congratulations, you've just held the police away from dealing with more serious problems. At least if you go over and speak to the man, speak to the child, and are fully satisfied by their story, you don't waste police time. If you aren't fully satisfied, sure, call the police in.

Of course, it's most likely that if a paedophile was trying to get a kid into his car he would shit himself at the first sign of another person intervening.

If the child is not offering any resistance, that doesnt mean the guy is her parent. Children may be non-violently deceived.

It's much more likely that a crying child will also get into his/her parents car and continue crying there rather than being tried to be persuaded to get in while crying on a street, even if the problem lies on the child, like s/he's trying to have his/her parents buy a toy. Besides crying children usually indicate bad parents. So I wouldnt feel bad about calling the cops in any case.

Crying children usually indicates bad parents? That's a ridiculous thing to say. My nephew cries when he doesn't get sweets in the shop. He cries when he doesn't get to stay in the park longer than his mum has time for. He cries if he has to go outside wearing his coat (which he doesn't like, but my sister can't afford to get him a new one). Bad parent? No, he's just being a kid.

And yeah, I'm more biased against men and I am male. It's quite logical to be more cautious given almost all rapes are committed by men.

But to do what you're saying you would do is more or less proposing that a man who cares about a child, who is not theirs, must have an ulterior motive.

If you were the Principal of a primary school, would you be happy employing a male teacher for the P2s? Or a male carer in a nursery? Or would your apparent automatic assumption that all males interested in children must have a sexual motive lead you to refuse to employ males in such positions?

Notice *usually* :rolleyes:

Kids cry all the time, they don't get the toy they want they get a scrape or are tired ... using crying in general as an indicator of bad parenting (meaning not excessively over time, something you are not in a position to do a rode side evaluation of) is just silly

Maybe parental reaction to it sure, but nothing was given in the OP to suggest their reaction to crying

OK, the cops come, the man turns out to be entirely innocent. Congratulations, you've just held the police away from dealing with more serious problems.


I dont think there is much crime in Halifax.


At least if you go over and speak to the man,


What? The pedo may try to kidnap me as well! :D


speak to the child, and are fully satisfied by their story, you don't waste police time. If you aren't fully satisfied, sure, call the police in.


They are not reliable. If the man is a pedo, obviously he is not. If the child is stressed and somehow intimidated, she may lie as well tho that's paradoxal with her refusal to get into the car, but human psychology is weird anyways.


Of course, it's most likely that if a paedophile was trying to get a kid into his car he would shit himself at the first sign of another person intervening.


Just an assumption of yours.


Crying children usually indicates bad children? That's a ridiculous thing to say. My nephew cries when he doesn't get sweets in the shop. He cries when he doesn't get to stay in the park longer than his mum has time for. He cries if he has to go outside wearing his coat (which he doesn't like, but my sister can't afford to get him a new one). Bad parent? No, he's just being a kid.


It's probably because they submit to his demands when he cries so he knows his tactic is useful. And as I said, it's much more likely that a regular kid cries in the car rather than in a street. It's suspicous that she is i) crying ii) crying in a street iii) being tried to be persuaded to get into car iv) by a man


But to do what you're saying you would do is more or less proposing that a man who cares about a child, who is not theirs, must have an ulterior motive.


If he cares about the child, he shouldnt scare her further by inviting her to a stranger's car. He should call the police so they can start to try to locate her parents.


If you were the Principal of a primary school, would you be happy employing a male teacher for the P2s? Or a male carer in a nursery? Or would your apparent automatic assumption that all males interested in children must have a sexual motive lead you to refuse to employ males in such positions?

I'm not a principle of a primary school and that's not a career I'm interested in, so it's irrelevant.

Kids cry all the time, they don't get the toy they want they get a scrape or are tired ... using crying in general as an indicator of bad parenting (meaning not excessively over time, something you are not in a position to do a rode side evaluation of) is just silly

Maybe parental reaction to it sure, but nothing was given in the OP to suggest their reaction to crying

If a kid cries because he wants a toy, that may indicate bad parenting. Bad parenting doesnt just mean hitting the kids or not taking them to soccer practice. Good parents usually try not to reward bad behaviour (buying the toy to shut the kid up). Hence, yeah, crying *usually* indicates bad parenting.

If a kid cries because he wants a toy, that may indicate bad parenting. Bad parenting doesnt just mean hitting the kids or not taking them to soccer practice. Good parents usually try not to reward bad behaviour (buying the toy to shut the kid up). Hence, yeah, crying *usually* indicates bad parenting.
And you've had HOW many kids?

Kids cry, sometimes they cry for no apparent reason. Adults are wired to respond to it, but that doesn't mean bad parenting.

If a kid cries because he wants a toy, that may indicate bad parenting. Bad parenting doesnt just mean hitting the kids or not taking them to soccer practice. Good parents usually try not to reward bad behaviour (buying the toy to shut the kid up). Hence, yeah, crying *usually* indicates bad parenting.

Would the kid not having a toy indicate that they were not rewarding bad behavior?

Or you assuming second level wierd unsupported inferences such as only the kid of a bad parent would cry because of a toy because they were bought off with toys in the past

pfft still un substantiated claims about "usually"

One would wonder if you had ever actually been around a kid in a supporting roll, but asking you would be pointless I am sure there will be some (in my view) likely made up personal story of taking care of kids all the time

Would the kid not having a toy indicate that they were not rewarding bad behavior?

Or you assuming second level wierd unsupported inferences such as only the kid of a bad parent would cry because of a toy because they were bought off with toys in the past


Can you not read? When have I said: "only the kid of a bad parent would cry because of a toy because they were bought off with toys in the past "

If a kid cries because he wants a toy, that may indicate bad parenting. Bad parenting doesnt just mean hitting the kids or not taking them to soccer practice. Good parents usually try not to reward bad behaviour (buying the toy to shut the kid up). Hence, yeah, crying *usually* indicates bad parenting.

Again, can you not read or not understand "may indicate" differs from "always indicates"


pfft still un substantiated claims about "usually"

One would wonder if you had ever actually been around a kid in a supporting roll, but asking you would be pointless I am sure there will be some (in my view) likely made up personal story of taking care of kids all the time

And you were talking about "second level wierd unsupported inferences"? :rolleyes:

In any case, I'm bored with you.

And you were talking about "second level wierd unsupported inferences"? :rolleyes:

In any case, I'm bored with you.

Yup I was, basing it on my knowledge of kids and parents, your reactions appear to support it.

And what does your boredom matter?

Edit because you had a weird quoting style

Can you not read? When have I said: "only the kid of a bad parent would cry because of a toy because they were bought off with toys in the past "


Where did I say that you said that I was asking (clear in context though maybe I should go fix my punctuation mistake to make it clearer for you)?

If that is not what you are meaning how would a kid crying for lack of a toy indicate being bought off with toys by a bad parent? your original supposition

asking the kid (of either sex) to go inside the car of a stranger, would make me think its a pedophilia attempt. it would had to have some real discernity, such as, the kid being away from home, by a very long distance. and definitely the adult would have to call the parents before anything... that unless the kid didn't knew the phone number.

however, if the man/woman walked outside the car, closed it, etc, and then talked with and comforted the kid and escorted him/her to school, playground, home, etc, i would see no harm in that. then again, in a long distance, phone again. if someone responsible (ie, parent of a friend of the kid) the kid knew was around, they should hand the kid over to them.

alas, ive done that once before and the mom thanked. cant remember anymore if the kid was lost or had a fight or anything, but i wasn't portrait ed as a sexual predator that time, even though im a man.
then again, i wasn't older than 16 or 18 or so at the time. people wouldn't probably trust me now (that im 22) as with most other adults, seeing how weird the world is becoming (or well, it was before, just being more noticed now):headbang: they just can't trust anyone. heck, if they don't trust teachers and educators and caretakers and babysitters enough, why would they trust a perfect stranger?

id guess most people would be fine if it was a woman who talked with the kid, rather than a man. for that same reason, maybe pedophile networks use too womans to get children, as womans are seen less of a threat to kids

as a side note, i don't think this poll reflects the thoughts of adults living on cities. on small towns people have more trust, but not on large cities for sure...

asking the kid (of either sex) to go inside the car of a stranger, would make me think its a pedophilia attempt. it would had to have some real discernity, such as, the kid being away from home, by a very long distance. and definitely the adult would have to call the parents before anything... that unless the kid didn't knew the phone number.

however, if the man/woman walked outside the car, closed it, etc, and then talked with and comforted the kid and escorted him/her to school, playground, home, etc, i would see no harm in that.

alas, ive done that once before and the mom thanked. cant remember anymore if the kid was lost or had a fight or anything, but i wasn't portrait ed as a sexual predator that time, even though im a man.
then again, i wasn't older than 16 or 18 or so at the time. people wouldn't probably trust me now (that im 22) as with most other adults, seeing how weird the world is becoming (or well, it was before, just being more noticed now):headbang:
How would you judge just by seeing them weather the man was a stranger or not? and if so how is a person walking away with a kid (to home, something you may not know where it is located) any more suspicious?

If a kid cries because he wants a toy, that may indicate bad parenting.


Go have yourself some kids before you post nonsense.

How would you judge just by seeing them weather the man was a stranger or not? and if so how is a person walking away with a kid (to home, something you may not know where it is located) any more suspicious?

if im a neighbor and know the kid and family more or less well, i would sort of know. anyways, nothing wrong with asking. so id guess id approach them and ask "whats up" if i sensed something fishy. then again, if i saw the kid crying i would almost definitely approach him/her before any stranger did, while still giving time to relatives do that before i did. that unless i had a BIG grudge with her/him, for whatever reason. maybe on that case i would just call the parents

As Dempublicents was being sexist and narrow-minded

Yeah, I'm just going to stop here. Because a notorious bigot like yourself, calling Dempublicents SEXIST...causes the rest of your thread to lose all credibility.

*poof it goes*

I seem to recall that, in the other thread, quite a few people insisted that women were responsible for perpetuating the idea that any man who approaches a child must be a pedophile.

Funny how this poll seems to be suggesting something rather different...

I would probably check on the girl to see why she was crying. I would be a little suspicious, but not because I'd think he's a paedophile, but because I'd be protective of the girl. Odds are he is probably just doing the same thing I'm doing: checking on her. Still, if he isn't...that's why I carry around the quality quarterstaff my parents got me for my birthday last year as a "walking stick." Let's me get away with taking it everywhere and I never have to worry about defending myself with that thing.

But WHY would you be protective of the girl if you didn't think the guy was a pedophile?

I'd grab my cell and call the police. Then would approach the man and tell him what I've done.

If I've seen a girl crying in the street, I would NOT try to convince her to get into my car (even if I had one), I'd also call the police and tell them there is a lost girl.

The situation I described is similar to one I linked to in another post. Thus you would be one of ther persons, apparently, who is likely to make other people wary of helping kids by calling the cops on them. People assume things. Guy talks to kid and cops turn up, every neighbour isn't going to come up to you to find out the reality of the story, especially if they believe the no smoke without fire rubbish - they would automatically assume the guy must be dodgy and probably try to ruin his life.

Also if you were the man referred to and you didn't try to help the kid (I never put the reason for her crying), she could end up dead. She could be trying to get away from a dangerous person and the nearest police station isn't within walking distance (and the kid may not want to stay where you found her). She may somehow be really far from her family (which may be no fault of theirs) and need to be driven to them. Etcetera.

So what? Worst case scenario, cops come and there is an interesting scene. And they let the man and child go after couple questions. It's actually the best case scenario, better to be safe than sorry. Besides, how can I investigate the situation?

Worst case scenario: see above. You can investigate by asking questions of the child. If th man is a paedophile, he will most likely want to disapppear ASAP once someone else shows up.

If the child is not offering any resistance, that doesnt mean the guy is her parent. Children may be non-violently deceived.

True. Which is why you investigate.

It's much more likely that a crying child will also get into his/her parents car and continue crying there rather than being tried to be persuaded to get in while crying on a street, even if the problem lies on the child, like s/he's trying to have his/her parents buy a toy. Besides crying children usually indicate bad parents. So I wouldnt feel bad about calling the cops in any case.

I'm guessing you don't have kids or many (or any) brothers and/or sisters. A few members of my family, as kids, have been annoyed st something reasonable (like playtime's over) and refused to get in my Dad's car, whilst crying. You don't know much about kids, so quite making assumptions. I have several brothers and sisters and have worked in a school before.

And yeah, I'm more biased against men and I am male. It's quite logical to be more cautious given almost all rapes are committed by men.

Wrong. The majority (but not "almost all") of REPORTED rapes are comitted by men, but how many men are likely to report that a woman has raped them? Just look at some of the reactions on a much earlier thread (not started by me) about a woman who had forced oral sex on a guy. Plus some countries don't even recognise female-on-male rape as rape.

I dont think there is much crime in Halifax.

Just your opinion. You've no idea how much crime there is. http://www.westyorkshire.police.uk/ (and if you mean Halifax in America, http://www.halifax.ca/Police/PressReleases/index.asp )


What? The pedo may try to kidnap me as well! :D

No. Paedophiles don't want to be caught. He'd most likely find an excuse to disappear quickly.

They are not reliable. If the man is a pedo, obviously he is not. If the child is stressed and somehow intimidated, she may lie as well tho that's paradoxal with her refusal to get into the car, but human psychology is weird anyways.

Children are very reliable when it comes to situations where an adult has attacked or tried to harm them (unless the adult HAS done that and has had chance to threaten the child not to tell anyone - but in taht case the kid would almost certainly just not say anything rather than lie). She would almost certainly tell you if the man had hurt her or threatened her and that's why she was crying.

Just an assumption of yours.

Wrong. See above.


It's probably because they submit to his demands when he cries so he knows his tactic is useful. And as I said, it's much more likely that a regular kid cries in the car rather than in a street. It's suspicous that she is i) crying ii) crying in a street iii) being tried to be persuaded to get into car iv) by a man

Or maybe it's because he/she THINKS IT WILL WORK THIS TIME and it hasn't sunk in yet that crying is useless. Or maybe the kid has fell and grazed their knee. Like I said, quit making assumptions about kids when you clearly know nothing about them.

If he cares about the child, he shouldnt scare her further by inviting her to a stranger's car. He should call the police so they can start to try to locate her parents.

See above

I'm not a principle of a primary school and that's not a career I'm interested in, so it's irrelevant.

It's very relevant, as you said you are biased towards males as as it relates to the reason for this thread, which is to see how many people (and what genders those people are) would automatically assume "paedophile!" just because a man (rather than a woman) was present in a situation that could be entirely innocent.

If a kid cries because he wants a toy, that may indicate bad parenting. Bad parenting doesnt just mean hitting the kids or not taking them to soccer practice. Good parents usually try not to reward bad behaviour (buying the toy to shut the kid up). Hence, yeah, crying *usually* indicates bad parenting.

See above.

asking the kid (of either sex) to go inside the car of a stranger, would make me think its a pedophilia attempt. it would had to have some real discernity, such as, the kid being away from home, by a very long distance. and definitely the adult would have to call the parents before anything... that unless the kid didn't knew the phone number.

But would you think it was a paedophilia attempt if the adult involved was a woman? As for the rest, see above.

however, if the man/woman walked outside the car, closed it, etc, and then talked with and comforted the kid and escorted him/her to school, playground, home, etc, i would see no harm in that. then again, in a long distance, phone again. if someone responsible (ie, parent of a friend of the kid) the kid knew was around, they should hand the kid over to them.

On the flip side, how would you know he wasn't escorting her somewhere to abuse her?

alas, ive done that once before and the mom thanked. cant remember anymore if the kid was lost or had a fight or anything, but i wasn't portrait ed as a sexual predator that time, even though im a man.
then again, i wasn't older than 16 or 18 or so at the time. people wouldn't probably trust me now (that im 22) as with most other adults, seeing how weird the world is becoming (or well, it was before, just being more noticed now):headbang: they just can't trust anyone. heck, if they don't trust teachers and educators and caretakers and babysitters enough, why would they trust a perfect stranger?

Why "alas"? And I didn't ask about trust, or whether you would think the man was suspicious. I asked whether you would think he was a paedophile or not.

id guess most people would be fine if it was a woman who talked with the kid, rather than a man. for that same reason, maybe pedophile networks use too womans to get children, as womans are seen less of a threat to kids

I've been on an adult chat site before. One that specifically bans incest, paedophilia, and rape chat. But there have been quite a number of women wanting to chat to me (about sickening stuff frankly) when I've logged on with a dodgy-sounding name to see what would happen (and to send them the US or UK link to the Child Abuse prevention organisation 'Stop It Now!'). There are certainly some sick women out there.

as a side note, i don't think this poll reflects the thoughts of adults living on cities. on small towns people have more trust, but not on large cities for sure...

Considering how varied nationstates posters are, I think it reflects lots of people, though of course I doubt everyone on nationstates voted and I don't know the male-to-female ratio on nationstates, but I do know that over 44% of respondents would consider the man to be a paedophile when the situation could be entirely innocent. And only 49 people voted, not even the usual minimum of 100 that is used in statistics.

Yeah, I'm just going to stop here. Because a notorious bigot like yourself, calling Dempublicents SEXIST...causes the rest of your thread to lose all credibility.

*poof it goes*

Egomanics aren't worth responding intelligently to.

I seem to recall that, in the other thread, quite a few people insisted that women were responsible for perpetuating the idea that any man who approaches a child must be a pedophile.

Funny how this poll seems to be suggesting something rather different...

Yes, but only a total of NINE females voted, whilst FORTY males voted, so it's not exactly evened out or representative (yet)

This topic is so asking for people to post what they know they should think rather than how they would actualy respond.

As Dempublicents was being sexist and narrow-minded (and possibly a few other people, though generally not)* in my post related to the father who couldn't help a kid because of his worries about being branded a paedophile, I've decided to make this poll.

What would you think if you looked out of your window, saw a girl whom you knew crying in the street, and a man whom you didn't know stood in front of her asking her to get into his car?

*Note that most people disagreed with the general theme of your posts - doesn't that tell you something? Nope? Didn't think so.

Tell ya what. Try again, this time without the flamebait.

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