NationStates Jolt Archive

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

what do you want to do? Take him out to a date of some sort?

If he's shy and likes you he's probably wanting to ask you out and lacks the nerve. Go up to him at one point, ask him if you can talk to him for a moment after class, find him, make sure not many people are around, and ask him out.

If he's shy and likes you he's probably wanting to ask you out and lacks the nerve. Go up to him at one point, ask him if you can talk to him for a moment after class, find him, make sure not many people are around, and ask him out.

That's exactly what I was thinking.

Save him the embarassment by doing it yourself, in a non-public way.

the fact is, any painfully shy guy is shy often because of self doubt. If you want to "subtly drop the hint", it won't work.

It won't work because you can be as subtle as a brick to the face, and he STILL won't believe you are actually showing signs of liking him. She's being friendly, she does that to everyone, etc etc. Shy, introverted people will believe that no matter how much it can POSSIBLY look like you like him, that you really don't.

So spare any type of doubt and just ask him yourself, because no matter how obvious you want to be, it's not gonna work.

Jump on his head.












Sorry about that.

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

if you ask him out you'll most likely make his year, save him all the worry and nerves about trying to do it himself. trust me if he likes you theres no way he'll be embarassed.

the fact is, any painfully shy guy is shy often because of self doubt. If you want to "subtly drop the hint", it won't work.

It won't work because you can be as subtle as a brick to the face, and he STILL won't believe you are actually showing signs of liking him. She's being friendly, she does that to everyone, etc etc. Shy, introverted people will believe that no matter how much it can POSSIBLY look like you like him, that you really don't.

So spare any type of doubt and just ask him yourself, because no matter how obvious you want to be, it's not gonna work.

Hes not that shy. I mean he talks to girls, he is just more of a quiet person all around, and Im pretty sure he can take a hint, instead of a brink I might say more of a baseball(?)

Anyway its 11:48 pm an I have to go to school tommorow. Ill read and maybe reply to your posts in the morning.

the fact is, any painfully shy guy is shy often because of self doubt. If you want to "subtly drop the hint", it won't work.

It won't work because you can be as subtle as a brick to the face, and he STILL won't believe you are actually showing signs of liking him. She's being friendly, she does that to everyone, etc etc. Shy, introverted people will believe that no matter how much it can POSSIBLY look like you like him, that you really don't.

So spare any type of doubt and just ask him yourself, because no matter how obvious you want to be, it's not gonna work.

Aye. I can tell you this from the guy's point of view. I'm one of those shy guys who can't see any sort of hint and refuse to believe such a hint is there. It's self-doubt. Even knowing that intellectually doesn't keep me from doing it.

Besides, it's a serious boost to such a shy guy's confidence to have a girl actually ask him out. Usually a shy guy like that won't be one of those who think only a guy can ask a girl out. You know, sexist idiots. Shy guys tend to be tolorant guys.

Hes not that shy. I mean he talks to girls, he is just more of a quiet person all around, and Im pretty sure he can take a hint, instead of a brink I might say more of a baseball(?)
Sounds like myself growing up. Don't use a brick, use a mallet, applied to the back of his head, and then drag him off to where you want to go to. Trust me, it might be the only way he'll get it. :D

Seriously though, don't play the hinting game, if you like him, ask him out directly. If you hint and hope you're just going to be waiting and confusing the hell out of him.

Ah, young love. I remember back when that young man was me ... way back in the old days ... my, the years seem to go by, don't they?

Hide in the bushes. Then, when he least expects it, you pounce!

:)

Im pretty sure he can take a hint

Don't. If you want to save him embarassment, don't "hint." Be direct.

Hide in the bushes. Then, when he least expects it, you pounce!

:)

yeah crash tackle him, school boys are like dogs they enjoy a bit roughed and tumble

Sex him. Sex him hardcorez.

Sex him. Sex him hardcorez.

Quoted for truth.

asking means making yourself vulnerable to a rejection
being asked means having control over the situation
so if you really like him, let him off the hook and take the risk yourself

the game of "it's the guy who has to take the risk" really sucks for quiet guys - especially in school where there are so many loud and brash guys who'll just drown them out - and it's not always safe for a quiet guy to draw attention to himself either

You know what would be classic, is if the dude she's talking about is this guy. (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=517165)

If NSG was a movie, that would totally be the case.

Chicks could hire marching bands and sky writers and I'd still think she was just being nice. I suck that way.

You know what would be classic, is if the dude she's talking about is this guy. (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=517165)

If NSG was a movie, that would totally be the case.

Chicks could hire marching bands and sky writers and I'd still think she was just being nice. I suck that way.

That would not be cool at all, because it would mean that the movie was a lame teen drama.

the fact is, any painfully shy guy is shy often because of self doubt. If you want to "subtly drop the hint", it won't work.

It won't work because you can be as subtle as a brick to the face, and he STILL won't believe you are actually showing signs of liking him. She's being friendly, she does that to everyone, etc etc. Shy, introverted people will believe that no matter how much it can POSSIBLY look like you like him, that you really don't.

So spare any type of doubt and just ask him yourself, because no matter how obvious you want to be, it's not gonna work.
QFT
asking means making yourself vulnerable to a rejection
being asked means having control over the situation
so if you really like him, let him off the hook and take the risk yourself

the game of "it's the guy who has to take the risk" really sucks for quiet guys - especially in school where there are so many loud and brash guys who'll just drown them out - and it's not always safe for a quiet guy to draw attention to himself either
Also QFT

It's all about using the right line. I suggest: "You. Pants off. Now!"

It's all about using the right line. I suggest: "You. Pants off. Now!"

Ya know… sometimes a guy can have such low confidence that even that wont work.
He will just think you are joking. Seriously, there was a period of about a year in college when women would blatantly throw themselves at me and I was completely oblivious.

The day after a party people would talk about how unbelievably slutty some girl was acting and that it was a good thing I didn’t go for it because she was obviously skanky by the way she was behaving – and here I was attracted to the girl but thought she was just being friendly. Had no idea whatsoever. Fortunately that didn’t last too long, as I now have at least a 50/50 chance of picking up on subtle hints like “Let’s go back to your place and crawl into bed”.

Seriously though… stop dropping hints and just tell him you like him. Instead of waiting around for him to ask you out, which you already know isn't likely to happen anytime soon, go ask him out.

No reason why a girl cannot tell a boy that she likes him.

As a shy guy myself, let me help you both.

If your certain this guy likes you, you are going to have to make the first move, becuase if you dont, he probably wont.
This guy wants you to like him, and doesnt want to make an ass of himself, in case you may be only a little interested in him.

Its a confidence thing.

All you need to do is be cool.
Just go over to him and ask if you could talk to him about something "really quick".
Just immediately ask if he'd like to go out on a date with you, and make it very casual sounding.
He'll immediately say yes, and his day will be made.

If he is as shy as you say he is, he probably doesnt catch subltety well.
I myself often require blatant messages up to an including neon signs that say "Do me, you moron!", that flash above a girls head, before I "get the hint".

The bonus to us "Shy Guys" is that we tend to treat the girls we really dig like Queens.

Ouch; this takes me back to my best-forgotten teenage days as a shy guy. To give you an example of how utterly oblivious we can be, I was outside once with a group of people, and a girl I was rather attracted to suddenly took me by the arm and walked off with me, pressing herself against me and saying nice things about me. All the while I was thinking: "I really like her. She seems to like me... Nah, she's probably just being friendly." And I did nothing.

I spent years kicking myself over that, and other examples.

I also had an ex-girlfriend once who had been trying to get me back again, and one day gave up being subtle about it and told me outright that she'd been dropping constant hints and that I hadn't noticed any of them.

So, as others have said, don't drop "hints". Not even obvious hints. Not even unmistakable hints that aren't even hints at all. Tell him you're interested, explicitly, and if possible in words of one syllable.

That's exactly what I was thinking.

Save him the embarassment by doing it yourself, in a non-public way.

I've yet to meet a girl who would ask a guy out. Sadly, it's always (or almost always) us doing the work. And if you're painfully shy (as I am), it can tend to make things very frustrating.

*sighs*

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

i've been the 'shy guy' in that situation before, and my best advice is to find an opportunity to be alone with him. i don't mean anything naughty by that, just that when i was in that situation the thing that stopped me from ever talking to the girl i liked, yet alone managing to ask her out or anything, was that she was always with friends or whatever. i felt i could deal with it if i just talked to her, but it was impossible to ever get the courage when she was always with other people.

plus it'd just be rude to but in between her and her friends :P

so make an opportunity somehow - subtle or not - for him to talk to you

I'm not really that shy with girls but from experience the greatest barrier is mustering enough courage as well as her friends. It makes us feel a lot more confident when her friends aren't around. Wether they like us or not it doesn't matter, it just makes me uncomfortable to say anything to a girl I like when the unrelenting judging eyes of her friends are on me. When a girl is easy going it makes me feel more comfortable when it comes to approaching her. being alone with him and just talking is the best way.

As a shy guy myself, let me help you both.

If your certain this guy likes you, you are going to have to make the first move, becuase if you dont, he probably wont.
This guy wants you to like him, and doesnt want to make an ass of himself, in case you may be only a little interested in him.

Its a confidence thing.

All you need to do is be cool.
Just go over to him and ask if you could talk to him about something "really quick".
Just immediately ask if he'd like to go out on a date with you, and make it very casual sounding.
He'll immediately say yes, and his day will be made.

If he is as shy as you say he is, he probably doesnt catch subltety well.
I myself often require blatant messages up to an including neon signs that say "Do me, you moron!", that flash above a girls head, before I "get the hint".

The bonus to us "Shy Guys" is that we tend to treat the girls we really dig like Queens.
Hear, hear!

Besides, "subtle hints" that women send out are not recognized as such (at least that's what I believe). We men (I can only speak for myself...) simply don't get it. Same goes with saying something in a roundabout way - if you (women) want us to do something, tell us what it is. It saves all of us (men and women) a lot of time and trouble.

Please keep us updated on how it went! ;)

... just ask him out yourself.

I don't know. I've been asked out, told that a certain person was interested in me, etc., but I rejected pretty much every attempt, even the most blatant ones (while I never received precisely a "Let's remove our clothes and do naughty things in bed", I would've rejected that too, even from someone I liked). There are some people who just aren't interested in relationships or sex or friendship or anything like that. I suggest making sure this person isn't one of them.

Er. Moving on.

Walk up to him and whisper in his ear "Want a blowjob?".

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

go over and talk to him. you'll probably end up curing his shyness. there's no law that says it has to be the boy that makes the first overt move.

Maybe he’s just not that into you.
If he’s just shy and he like you, and he isn't doing anything about it, then he’s a pathetic person. I’ve known chicks who thought they’d be happy with the “smart, shy sensitive” type. It never works out.
Well, unless you’re unattractive or something. Beggars can’t be choosers.

As a shy guy myself, let me help you both.

If your certain this guy likes you, you are going to have to make the first move, becuase if you dont, he probably wont.
This guy wants you to like him, and doesnt want to make an ass of himself, in case you may be only a little interested in him.

Its a confidence thing.

All you need to do is be cool.
Just go over to him and ask if you could talk to him about something "really quick".
Just immediately ask if he'd like to go out on a date with you, and make it very casual sounding.
He'll immediately say yes, and his day will be made.

If he is as shy as you say he is, he probably doesnt catch subltety well.
I myself often require blatant messages up to an including neon signs that say "Do me, you moron!", that flash above a girls head, before I "get the hint".

The bonus to us "Shy Guys" is that we tend to treat the girls we really dig like Queens.
QFT. i'm told that i am completely oblivious to hints. but people only tell me a girl's been hinting at me after the fact. why won't people just tell me at the time!? it would make things so much easier!

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

I'm a shy guy. Take my advice.

Find out where he hangs out during lunch. If it's not like, in a small area, move your group that you hang out with during lunch there. At first make it seem like you're just sitting there because of the convenience of... Something. Just don't make it seem like you're trying to talk to him. Ever-so-often talk to him. Don't like "talk to him", per se in like, chatting with him. But like, you know. Talk to him. Don't do the whole "Hi" thing to him while you're passing or he's passing you. Believe me, shy guys get totally freaked out at that. Just like, notice he's there, maybe look at him (NOT in a way that would make him think you want to talk to him). After a while, invite him over to eat with your group. If he's more secure about your group now than he was before, you'll succeed and probably make a new friend. If he's not, it's better to have tried and failed then to have never tried at all. Also, if someone in your group has any classes with him, try to get them to make friends with him so that he would be more inclined to sit with you during lunch.

Now if he has a group of friends that he hangs out with during lunch, that is something ENTIRELY different. Believe me, pack animal ideology DOES spread over to humans. The best way to break down the protective barrier of friends is to have someone in your group make friends with one of his friends. Eventually his friend will tell them to sit with your group, and voila. Easy enough.

Of course, if you have any classes with him, you could try the more direct approach and partner up with him (subtly) in any group or pair projects in classes. Don't request it ALL the time, or he will know something is up. Just like, have your friends all be in one group so that you can't be in it, then ask him if he would be in your group with him. Of course, don't do that EVERY time you end up needing a partner, or, yes, he WILL know something is up. Go to him like, every other time. And believe me, if he's smart, the best way to get to him during these group situations is to allow him to work on the project or whatever. Don't just chit-chat with him all the time, or he will get annoyed with you. Also, this may seem like it might hurt him, and on the surface he himself will actually take hurt to it, but believe me, this makes him enjoy you more. Point out his mistakes on the project or whatever it is. Any little mistake you can find. This will show your intelligence to him, and, even though it may not look like it, he does appreciate it.

Well, that's all I can think of right now. Tell us how this goes.

QFT. i'm told that i am completely oblivious to hints. but people only tell me a girl's been hinting at me after the fact. why won't people just tell me at the time!? it would make things so much easier!
Because those people are full of it. You’d know it.

Because those people are full of it. You’d know it.

shush you! :p

Its kind of lame, but it may work.

Tell your best friend to go to HIS best friend and say she thinks you like his friend. Then he will go talk to his friend and tell him that your friend came to him and said her friend liked him. (Hey, english sucks :mad: )

I hope you understood. Anyway, just go and ASK HIM OUT. Dont say its a date, dont say you want to be his girlfriend or he will freak out. Just ask him out to go see a movie.

Or go on a double date. Go and talk to his friend and say you and your friend want to go out with him and his friend. Then you have 4 people, you talk with your friend so you can sit next to the guy you´re interested.

Tell your best friend to go to HIS best friend and say she thinks you like his friend. Then he will go talk to his friend and tell him that your friend came to him and said her friend liked him. (Hey, english sucks :mad: )
Doesn't usually work. I wouldn't even consider someone who did that, male or female, because it's a sign that said person doesn't have the balls to tell me him/herself, and if so how will we ever talk about anything really interesting? (because that's a rather important part of a relationship, at least in my opinion.)

Its kind of lame, but it may work.

Tell your best friend to go to HIS best friend and say she thinks you like his friend. Then he will go talk to his friend and tell him that your friend came to him and said her friend liked him. (Hey, english sucks :mad: )

I hope you understood. Anyway, just go and ASK HIM OUT. Dont say its a date, dont say you want to be his girlfriend or he will freak out. Just ask him out to go see a movie.

Or go on a double date. Go and talk to his friend and say you and your friend want to go out with him and his friend. Then you have 4 people, you talk with your friend so you can sit next to the guy you´re interested.

Somebody tried that on me once. Didn't work.

Of course, I should mention that it was a bloke delivering the mesage, and I didn't know WHO he was talking about. I believe he may have pointed at her, but my sight's hopeless. I dismissed it and walked away.

To the OP: Are you sure he's straight? I've had girls hit on me at high school, quite overtly. I just was not interested and acted the part too. Most of them thought I was simply being shy, even though the truth of the matter was that I didn't want to send false signals.

I hope you´re women, because once my friend comes to me and says there is a girl interested in me, I go to her at once. And I do think asking your friend to ask a girl out is stupid.

Unless she is ugly (what did happened a few times).

Anyway, I do think its stupid to ask someone else to ask people out, but well, these are kids.

Ok. I have a question...

Why does this have to start out as dating? What if...You just went and started hanging out? Then you could give him the time to adjust and get his bearings.

I really think if he is that quiet withdrawn type that making the first move is probably a really bad idea. Possibly unforgiveable in his mind.

You already know what you want. Let him figure out for himself.

Ok. I have a question...

Why does this have to start out as dating? What if...You just went and started hanging out? Then you could give him the time to adjust and get his bearings.

I really think if he is that quiet withdrawn type that making the first move is probably a really bad idea. Possibly unforgiveable in his mind.

You already know what you want. Let him figure out for himself.

TERRIBLE ADVICE ALERT, WEEEE-OOOO,WEEEE-OOOO.


Newsflash: To guys, a girl asking him to just "hang out" is considered a date. Quiet withdrawn types cannot make the first move, so they rely on girls to do so. The advice to "let him figure it out for himself" is such terrible advice, I'm really trying my hardest not to just yell at you.

ASK HIM OUT.

ASK

HIM

OUT.

That's the only way! Don't drop hints, don't tell your friends to tell his friends, don't just hope he'll ask you out first, JUST ASK THE DAMN GUY OUT.


ASAP. BECAUSE HE'S PROBABLY LONELY.

I wonder why I imagined cheerleaders raising boards with the ASK HIM OUT letters and doing the ASK HIM OUT dance when I readed Szanth post.

Well, I guess any reason is good to imagine cheer leaders.

TERRIBLE ADVICE ALERT, WEEEE-OOOO,WEEEE-OOOO.


Newsflash: To guys, a girl asking him to just "hang out" is considered a date. Quiet withdrawn types cannot make the first move, so they rely on girls to do so. The advice to "let him figure it out for himself" is such terrible advice, I'm really trying my hardest not to just yell at you.

ASK HIM OUT.

ASK

HIM

OUT.

That's the only way! Don't drop hints, don't tell your friends to tell his friends, don't just hope he'll ask you out first, JUST ASK THE DAMN GUY OUT.


ASAP. BECAUSE HE'S PROBABLY LONELY.

Yes. You could jump the gun. And you'll probably get some dates out of it and maybe stay steady for a year or so...It could work.
But you're stripping the romance and the chase. And you're probably going to end up losing some respect. His self-respect in the relationship and some slight amount of your respect from him. Whether you admit it or not. And don't give me the "This is 2007" speech cause I don't think the mechanics of emotion are moving as fast as politics would like. Most of the really quiet but still confident guys I've known are very intense and very serious. And wear their pride on their sleeve. I'm not saying it couldn't work, but give the guy some time.

And yes. Guys consider it a date to hang out. But without the stress. That's the point.

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

Speaking FROM EXPERIENCE OF BEING A SHY GUY IN HIGH SCHOOL, my advice is do EXACTLY what made me (almost, until she annoyed me the next day by perving on me in the boys' changing rooms) admit I liked a girl:

DO flirt with him. LOTS. Keep it up. He might move away from you, even tell you to fuck off at first or even insult you, even if he does fancy you (I did it to hide the fact that I fancied a particular girl). If he does insult you, beat him up. If he really doesn't like you, he'll just continue insulting you and telling you to fuck off

DO flirt with him when you're both on your own. He's not going to admit his feelings in front of a group of people.

DO continue the flirting, and eventually say something like "don't move away, I know you like me" (the important bit is "I know you like me" - you're helping to get him to admit it by letting him know that you already know he likes you so there's no point him acting otherwise. Not too long after this (day or few), gently get him to admit he likes you - I can't remember what this particular girl said to me, but I think it was just basically something along the lines of "You fancy me don't you?"

DON'T pressure him into admitting he likes you too early. Follow the above IN THAT ORDER (remember I'm speaking from experience). DON'T only flirt with him when there are other people around. And DON'T perv on him in the changing rooms (seriously, I would love that now, but as a shy kid I hated it)

Oh yeh and whilst flirting, make it clear that you like him. NO subtleties. TELL him you fancy him (or whatever the words for "fancy him" are in your country).

Yes. You could jump the gun. And you'll probably get some dates out of it and maybe stay steady for a year or so...It could work.
But you're stripping the romance and the chase. And you're probably going to end up losing some respect. His self-respect in the relationship and some slight amount of your respect from him. Whether you admit it or not. And don't give me the "This is 2007" speech cause I don't think the mechanics of emotion are moving as fast as politics would like. Most of the really quiet but still confident guys I've known are very intense and very serious. And wear their pride on their sleeve. I'm not saying it couldn't work, but give the guy some time.

And yes. Guys consider it a date to hang out. But without the stress. That's the point.

No, seriously. You're pushing it. You're probably that idiot friend who gives the worst possible advice to people who don't know any better, and if you were this girl's friend, you'd be ruining it for both her and this guy.

He will NOT lose respect for you if you ask him out. NOT AT ALL. I REPEAT. DO NOT BE STUPID. I cannot BEGIN to imagine where you thought this crazy shit up.

Middle school. High school. Even right now, somewhat. I was the shy guy. I'm a hopeless romantic, but I had shit for self-esteem and simply could NOT ask a girl out. At one point a girl came up to me and said the words "If you were a drug, I'd do you" and I didn't know wtf to say because I'd never acknowledged any positive feedback from girls before. But I still weasled out of it, I convinced myself she was making fun of me, because she never actually asked me out.


In the name of all that is good and holy, SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE YOU AND EVERYONE LIKE YOU RUINS THE TEENAGE WORLD WITH YOUR BULLSHIT ADVICE.


ASK HIM OUT. ASK HIM THE FUCK OUT. COME OUT AND SAY IT.


Jesus Christ, kiss him if you need to! I don't think you people really "GET" how low people can sink and imagine themselves to be to where they don't even want to see the hints.

To review: STFU.

Also, I think you're confusing the "quiet badass" with the "quiet shy guy". HUGE mistake.

TERRIBLE ADVICE ALERT, WEEEE-OOOO,WEEEE-OOOO.


Newsflash: To guys, a girl asking him to just "hang out" is considered a date. Quiet withdrawn types cannot make the first move, so they rely on girls to do so. The advice to "let him figure it out for himself" is such terrible advice, I'm really trying my hardest not to just yell at you.

ASK HIM OUT.

ASK

HIM

OUT.

That's the only way! Don't drop hints, don't tell your friends to tell his friends, don't just hope he'll ask you out first, JUST ASK THE DAMN GUY OUT.


ASAP. BECAUSE HE'S PROBABLY LONELY.

No, seriously. You're pushing it. You're probably that idiot friend who gives the worst possible advice to people who don't know any better, and if you were this girl's friend, you'd be ruining it for both her and this guy.

He will NOT lose respect for you if you ask him out. NOT AT ALL. I REPEAT. DO NOT BE STUPID. I cannot BEGIN to imagine where you thought this crazy shit up.

Middle school. High school. Even right now, somewhat. I was the shy guy. I'm a hopeless romantic, but I had shit for self-esteem and simply could NOT ask a girl out. At one point a girl came up to me and said the words "If you were a drug, I'd do you" and I didn't know wtf to say because I'd never acknowledged any positive feedback from girls before. But I still weasled out of it, I convinced myself she was making fun of me, because she never actually asked me out.


In the name of all that is good and holy, SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE YOU AND EVERYONE LIKE YOU RUINS THE TEENAGE WORLD WITH YOUR BULLSHIT ADVICE.


ASK HIM OUT. ASK HIM THE FUCK OUT. COME OUT AND SAY IT.


Jesus Christ, kiss him if you need to! I don't think you people really "GET" how low people can sink and imagine themselves to be to where they don't even want to see the hints.

To review: STFU.

Uh... Szanth? You might want to take a deep breath and step away from the computer for a minute or two before you start seriously flaming someone over this. o.O

Uh... Szanth? You might want to take a deep breath and step away from the computer for a minute or two before you start seriously flaming someone over this. o.O

-_-

I know, I'm sorry. I apologize.

I get worked up when I see the same stuff that happened to me happen to other people. I tried to be somewhat collected in the first post but then he/she had to go and try to be all high and mighty like... okay I'm getting heated again.


Sorry.

-_-

I know, I'm sorry. I apologize.

I get worked up when I see the same stuff that happened to me happen to other people. I tried to be somewhat collected in the first post but then he/she had to go and try to be all high and mighty like... okay I'm getting heated again.


Sorry.
*pats* :p

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

Drop your pants and bend over the table in front of him.





What?

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

speaking as a shy guy, ask him for school help. say a couple of problems here and there, talk about the assignment...

from there, you can steer the conversation towards other things. find out his interests and what not (be prepared for one word answers... that doesn't mean he's not interested.)

keep it at that point for about a week or so, then set up a study date. that will get me... him... used to seeing you outside of school.

if you find that he is interesting and you return his feelings, then go to the movies (dutch) that will continue to build up his confidence. when he's ready, he'll start asking you out.

Shy people, or at least in my experience, tend to lack self confidence in social settings. go slow and he'll catch on.

Throw an Onion at him.

Drop your pants and bend over the table in front of him.





What?

Seriously, I don't think that would work. If anything he'd think she was making fun of him or being dared to do that by someone else.

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

Get his phone number.
Call him. Don't ask him out, just talk.
Exchange email, MSN, whatever addresses, keep talking to him.
If he doesn't enjoy talking to you ... you lose.
Anyway.

Get his phone number.
Call him. Don't ask him out, just talk.
Exchange email, MSN, whatever addresses, keep talking to him.
If he doesn't enjoy talking to you ... you lose.
Anyway.

Phail.



You're all just making it far more complicated than it needs to be. Really. Just ask the guy out, and be sincere about it. That's all you need to do.

Hes not that shy. I mean he talks to girls, he is just more of a quiet person all around, and Im pretty sure he can take a hint, instead of a brink I might say more of a baseball(?)I talked to girls in High School, I interacted "normally" with them, but I could never bring myself to asking them out. (still can't).

Seriously though, don't play the hinting game, if you like him, ask him out directly. If you hint and hope you're just going to be waiting and confusing the hell out of him.Agreed.

As a shy guy myself, let me help you both.

If your certain this guy likes you, you are going to have to make the first move, becuase if you dont, he probably wont.
This guy wants you to like him, and doesnt want to make an ass of himself, in case you may be only a little interested in him.

Its a confidence thing.

All you need to do is be cool.
Just go over to him and ask if you could talk to him about something "really quick".
Just immediately ask if he'd like to go out on a date with you, and make it very casual sounding.
He'll immediately say yes, and his day will be made.

If he is as shy as you say he is, he probably doesnt catch subltety well.
I myself often require blatant messages up to an including neon signs that say "Do me, you moron!", that flash above a girls head, before I "get the hint".Agreed.... (glad I wasn't/am not alone with this problem.)

The bonus to us "Shy Guys" is that we tend to treat the girls we really dig like Queens. QFT!!!

TERRIBLE ADVICE ALERT, WEEEE-OOOO,WEEEE-OOOO.

Newsflash: To guys, a girl asking him to just "hang out" is considered a date. Quiet withdrawn types cannot make the first move, so they rely on girls to do so. The advice to "let him figure it out for himself" is such terrible advice, I'm really trying my hardest not to just yell at you.

ASK HIM OUT.

ASK

HIM

OUT.

That's the only way! Don't drop hints, don't tell your friends to tell his friends, don't just hope he'll ask you out first, JUST ASK THE DAMN GUY OUT.

ASAP. BECAUSE HE'S PROBABLY LONELY.but becareful. I would say build up his confidence by "hanging out" with him. as in just be nearby, talk to him about school, television programs, computers, whatever. Then ask him out. that way, he won't be afraid of trying to live up to whatever image he thinks you have of him.

Yes. You could jump the gun. And you'll probably get some dates out of it and maybe stay steady for a year or so...It could work.
But you're stripping the romance and the chase. And you're probably going to end up losing some respect. His self-respect in the relationship and some slight amount of your respect from him. Whether you admit it or not. And don't give me the "This is 2007" speech cause I don't think the mechanics of emotion are moving as fast as politics would like. Most of the really quiet but still confident guys I've known are very intense and very serious. And wear their pride on their sleeve. I'm not saying it couldn't work, but give the guy some time.

And yes. Guys consider it a date to hang out. But without the stress. That's the point. Not a problem, the Romance can be inserted at any time. the point of the matter is to build up his confidence enough for him to start romancing her.

Oh, and no matter how funny his romancing gets, show appreciation. smile, but try not to laugh... while in public... and with anyone near.

DO continue the flirting, and eventually say something like "don't move away, I know you like me" (the important bit is "I know you like me" - you're helping to get him to admit it by letting him know that you already know he likes you so there's no point him acting otherwise. Not too long after this (day or few), gently get him to admit he likes you - I can't remember what this particular girl said to me, but I think it was just basically something along the lines of "You fancy me don't you?"

DON'T pressure him into admitting he likes you too early. Follow the above IN THAT ORDER (remember I'm speaking from experience). DON'T only flirt with him when there are other people around. And DON'T perv on him in the changing rooms (seriously, I would love that now, but as a shy kid I hated it)

Oh yeh and whilst flirting, make it clear that you like him. NO subtleties. TELL him you fancy him (or whatever the words for "fancy him" are in your country).That would've made my HS life easier...

No, seriously. You're pushing it. You're probably that idiot friend who gives the worst possible advice to people who don't know any better, and if you were this girl's friend, you'd be ruining it for both her and this guy.

He will NOT lose respect for you if you ask him out. NOT AT ALL. I REPEAT. DO NOT BE STUPID. I cannot BEGIN to imagine where you thought this crazy shit up.

Middle school. High school. Even right now, somewhat. I was the shy guy. I'm a hopeless romantic, but I had shit for self-esteem and simply could NOT ask a girl out. At one point a girl came up to me and said the words "If you were a drug, I'd do you" and I didn't know wtf to say because I'd never acknowledged any positive feedback from girls before. But I still weasled out of it, I convinced myself she was making fun of me, because she never actually asked me out.

In the name of all that is good and holy, SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE YOU AND EVERYONE LIKE YOU RUINS THE TEENAGE WORLD WITH YOUR BULLSHIT ADVICE.


ASK HIM OUT. ASK HIM THE FUCK OUT. COME OUT AND SAY IT.

Jesus Christ, kiss him if you need to! I don't think you people really "GET" how low people can sink and imagine themselves to be to where they don't even want to see the hints.

To review: STFU.... while I would've worded it differently, I gotta ask...

are you my twin or something?
:p

Reminder: My post was from experience. LISTEN TO ME!!! :D

... while I would've worded it differently, I gotta ask...

are you my twin or something?
:p

Possibly.


<3

Just immediately ask if he'd like to go out on a date with you, and make it very casual sounding.
He'll immediately say yes, and his day will be made.
Why does everyone automatically assume this?

I've been in situations like that. I turned down the date. Not because I didn't like the person in question, but because I was too afraid of relationships and emotional contact. If you end up with a person like that... well, I can only advise you to wait a few years.

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

Shit man, stop trying to guess how he may feel, and just go ask him out.

Shit man, stop trying to guess how he may feel, and just go ask him out.

QFT.

Ask him out. Now.

Seriously, Right now. DO you know where he lives? Go there now.

Why does everyone automatically assume this?

I've been in situations like that. I turned down the date. Not because I didn't like the person in question, but because I was too afraid of relationships and emotional contact. If you end up with a person like that... well, I can only advise you to wait a few years.

Not even a few years. A girl once asked me out and I said "yes" just because, but at the time my parents were going through crap and my mom was cheating on my dad and I was living with my grandparents, so I had a lot of stuff on my mind, and I was running on mostly autopilot for those few years. I said yes because she was cute and I was lonely. After I said yes, though, it went downhill. I was unresponsive, didn't talk to her much, didn't see her outside of school, never kissed her, never hugged her - horrible boyfriend, just because I was in a bad frame of mind and didn't have the mental capacity to really understand or care about what was going on around me.

So yeah, sometimes quiet guys are quiet for a reason. Most of the time, though, they're just shy as hell and need you to take the first step. I'm fairly certain the relationship would've been better if the girl had tried to talk to me and find out if something was wrong. Just roll initiative and hope for a natural 20.

Ask him out. Now.

Seriously, Right now. DO you know where he lives? Go there now.

Finally, more people with the right idea.


<3

Finally, more people with the right idea.


<3

Cause most of us are shy guys :p

Finally, more people with the right idea.

Most of them have the "right idea" because they're sexually frustrated, have difficulties asking females out, and thus wait for the females to ask them out. Of course they'd recommend their fantasies to the few females out there silly enough to ask them (no offence intended to such females of course).

Finally, more people with the right idea.


<3

it's not the "right" Idea.

it's an idea.

if a girl, even one I do like, were to suddenly ask me out on a date out of the blue, chances are I would refuse. however, if that girl took the time to get to know me first. then that would up the probablity of me saying yes. Also, it gives her a chance to know who I am. then she can decide wether or not I'm worth the effort, and it is an effort to crack the shell of shyness.

Cause most of us are shy guys :p

Indeed. SHYGUYS, UNITE!

http://andros.webblogg.se/images/shyguy_1134306477.jpg

Most of them have the "right idea" because they're sexually frustrated, have difficulties asking females out, and thus wait for the females to ask them out. Of course they'd recommend their fantasies to the few females out there silly enough to ask them (no offence intended to such females of course).

Of course - god forbid you ask the shy guys what to do with a shy guy. Seriously. That'd be fucked up, getting the right perspective and all.

Indeed. SHYGUYS, UNITE!

http://andros.webblogg.se/images/shyguy_1134306477.jpg

... err... idunnoIgotthisthingIgottadomaybelater.

Indeed. SHYGUYS, UNITE!

http://andros.webblogg.se/images/shyguy_1134306477.jpg

It was only a matter of time before something like this popped up in this thread...

This oen girl totally fell for me after I ''broke the ice'' at a party. Here's how to break the ice the next time you go to a party that isn't ''happenin'''

http://www.coldbacon.com/pics/nicosia/nicosia-violence.jpg

This oen girl totally fell for me after I ''broke the ice'' at a party. Here's how to break the ice the next time you go to a party that isn't ''happenin'''

http://www.coldbacon.com/pics/nicosia/nicosia-violence.jpg

My god, what a small room and what an ugly woman.

This oen girl totally fell for me after I ''broke the ice'' at a party. Here's how to break the ice the next time you go to a party that isn't ''happenin'''

http://www.coldbacon.com/pics/nicosia/nicosia-violence.jpg

So you falcon punch the host while your designated driver makes off with the only woman?

As a quiet guy, I tend to still gravitate towards the idea that it's pathetic if a girl has to ask me out and not me ask them.

...then again...maybe that's why I'm still single.

Seriously, wtf's your problem.

Lack of emotions are the last vestige of manliness I retain.

As a quiet guy, I tend to still gravitate towards the idea that it's pathetic if a girl has to ask me out and not me ask them.

...then again...maybe that's why I'm still single.

Seriously, wtf's your problem.

Lack of emotions are the last vestige of manliness I retain.

*shrugs* I wouldn't recommend a girl ask a guy out if he thinks less of her for doing so. Not to make him like her, but because he seems like a dick.

As a quiet guy, I tend to still gravitate towards the idea that it's pathetic if a girl has to ask me out and not me ask them.

...then again...maybe that's why I'm still single.

I don't... a girl asking me out is my only hope. :(

In my experience, being a "shy guy" who dosn't ask girls out, but can talk with them easily, what worked was when a girl started to hang out with my group of friends for a little while, and then asked me out (she was going to do it when we were alone, but chickened out and passed me a note in class...I said yes anyway.. *shrugs*). I knew her, and I knew that I liked hanging out with her, and so I said yes. On the other hand, there have been a couple girls that have asked me out and I've turned them down, but that was more my personal issues than how they approached me.

Just as a side note, and I know it's an Internet forum and everything, but if I were that guy I'd be more disturbed by your complete lack of control when it comes to writing coherent, correct missives. Try to at least spell a few of the words in a sentence correctly, then we can move on to grammar. What is the world coming to? :headbang:

*shrugs* I wouldn't recommend a girl ask a guy out if he thinks less of her for doing so. Not to make him like her, but because he seems like a dick.

Not less of her, less of myself.

Not less of her, less of myself.

Ah. Still, though, it reflects badly because you're incredibly insecure about your masculinity, so the relationship would never work out anyway.

It makes me feel better when a girl takes the lead in wanting to date. It means she's interested in me and want to go out. It makes me feel more confident especially when I've already known her on a friend basis. When I get the hint she wants to take it in another direction then it gives me the courage to finally ask her out.

How do you tell if a guy likes you anway..? :rolleyes:

Phail.



You're all just making it far more complicated than it needs to be. Really. Just ask the guy out, and be sincere about it. That's all you need to do.

As a shy guy myself, I would definately agree with you on all of your posts on the topic. It's that simple.

Ah. Still, though, it reflects badly because you're incredibly insecure about your masculinity, so the relationship would never work out anyway.

Well, I'm not THAT insecure about my masculinity. After all, I have this (http://www.newgrounds.com/audio/view.php?id=7373&sub=25907) song on iTunes. I just shun displaying any type of sensitivity publicly...

It doesn't matter too much to me now, anyway, seeing as at this age most "I like you more than a friend" attraction to girls is purely sexual in nature (I've yet to meet a straight girl I like just because). Damn testosterone.

How do you tell if a guy likes you anway..? :rolleyes:

Typically, erections. *nod*

Typically, erections. *nod*

On a more serious note? :p
Yeah, I like this guy, and his writing matches a Valentines card I got last February, but I don't know what to do.
We make lots of eye contact, and hug a lot, but still.. I am confused.
I don't know whether I should go for the direct approach or not, but I think I will.
What is the best way to tell him? :confused:

Don't ask me. I've never had the balls to ask a girl out, though considering the girls I liked, it's a good thing I didn't ask them out.

"You wanna hang out sometime after school?"

That's a good line

Don't ask me. I've never had the balls to ask a girl out, though considering the girls I liked, it's a good thing I didn't ask them out.

Hmm..
Girls often wonder, "WHY won't they just tell us they like us?!"
It's true, it would make things a whole lot easier, and save us a lot of embarrassment, but lots of girls don't stop to think that they're shier than some of us are..

What about when: you don't have a car, and the people in question come from cultures which aren't too accepting of women dating without parental consent (or at all at this age), or dating outside of their ethnicity, or are extremely suspicious of young teenage men in general?

"You wanna hang out sometime after school?"

That's a good line

Have been debating whether to invite him over for a game of pool..

Have been debating whether to invite him over for a game of pool..

That's a great one. It doesn't imply anything drastic but it gives the two of you some alone time to just talk, play a game, and hang out.

Hmm..
Girls often wonder, "WHY won't they just tell us they like us?!"
It's true, it would make things a whole lot easier, and save us a lot of embarrassment, but lots of girls don't stop to think that they're shier than some of us are..

Boys fear rejection and embarassment from the awkward moment that follows when a girl says ''no''. We have no plan B when a girl says no or brush us off. We fumble and try to play it off.

That's a great one. It doesn't imply anything drastic but it gives the two of you some alone time to just talk, play a game, and hang out.

I think I will ask him.
Or there's a club that my friends and I sometimes go to on Saturday nights, I could ask casually if he's interested in coming.
Lots of dancing, space to talk, music, computers..

-_-

I know, I'm sorry. I apologize.

I get worked up when I see the same stuff that happened to me happen to other people. I tried to be somewhat collected in the first post but then he/she had to go and try to be all high and mighty like... okay I'm getting heated again.


Sorry.

That explains a lot. Somebody got burned....Congratulations. You earned the flaming asshole award.

But I'm glad you've got it all figured out now. *pats on the head* Run along, honey..

There is much to be said for a little subtlety and tact in a relationship...(I.M.H.O. no need to flame. You're allowed to disagree...It won't hurt. I promise.) You might be surprised with what happens when you actually give things a little bit of time instead of trying to rush.

Boys fear rejection and embarassment from the awkward moment that follows when a girl says ''no''. We have no plan B when a girl says no or brush us off. We fumble and try to play it off.

I often feel like I'm the only girl in our group who understands that.

That explains a lot. Somebody got burned....Congratulations. You earned the flaming asshole award.

But I'm glad you've got it all figured out now. *pats on the head* Run along, honey..

There is much to be said for a little subtlety and tact in a relationship...(I.M.H.O. no need to flame. You're allowed to disagree...It won't hurt. I promise.) You might be surprised with what happens when you actually give things a little bit of time instead of trying to rush.

I know what happens when things are given time. Nothing. Why? Because most of the time, the shy guy does just that. Nothing. Because he's shy. Really quite simple. Look at all the people agreeing with me.

EDIT: Also, there is no relationship at this point. You're acting like both of them know they like eachother and are just playing a game. They're not. Talk about jumping the gun, most relationships start off with "you wanna go out".

I know what happens when things are given time. Nothing. Why? Because most of the time, the shy guy does just that. Nothing. Because he's shy. Really quite simple. Look at all the people agreeing with me.

First of all...I didn't say do nothing. I said spend time with him and get to know him a little. I even made a statement to use "subtlety and tact". Which does imply doing...something. Just not everything at once.;)

First of all...I didn't say do nothing. I said spend time with him and get to know him a little. I even made a statement to use "subtlety and tact". Which does imply doing...something. Just not everything at once.;)

And you've ignored all the people on here who've contested that guys, especially shy ones, do not pick up on subtlety or hints.

I think I will ask him.
Or there's a club that my friends and I sometimes go to on Saturday nights, I could ask casually if he's interested in coming.
Lots of dancing, space to talk, music, computers..

That's a perfect opportunity!

I often feel like I'm the only girl in our group who understands that.

I wish more girls understood:(

And you've ignored all the people on here who've contested that guys, especially shy ones, do not pick up on subtlety or hints.

You're right. I've ignored that. I never took that into consideration. Guys do take hints. They're just a little slow at it. And you can lead someone along without busting out and stepping on their toes just because you're impatient. You know, you don't really HAVE to jump right into a full-blown relationship right away. You could get to know someone first. See if maybe there's anything worth pursuing.

I wish more girls understood:(

Indeed.

That's a perfect opportunity!

I get shy though, but I'll try.

I wish more girls understood:(

Aww.. Sometimes, so do I.

On a more serious note? :p
Yeah, I like this guy, and his writing matches a Valentines card I got last February, but I don't know what to do.
We make lots of eye contact, and hug a lot, but still.. I am confused.
I don't know whether I should go for the direct approach or not, but I think I will.
What is the best way to tell him? :confused:

"say, wanna go to the movies this weekend?"

I get shy though, but I'll try.



Aww.. Sometimes, so do I.

Well, you'll be in a friendly and social atmosphere where you can get to know him better. It's a good way to test the waters.

The one thing is that girls don't realize how much of a blow it is to a boy when they reject or brush him off. It's a sever blow to our masculinity as well as our confidence. Now, I'm not trying to guilt women into saying yes just so that they don't hurt the poor bastards feelings. But when a girl takes charge we don't have to be put in an uncomfortable situation and we get to save grace.

"say, wanna go to the movies this weekend?"

I'll see if I'm feeling brave enough!
I'm shy-ish..

I'll see if I'm feeling brave enough!
I'm shy-ish.....
can't help you there... since I'm in the same boat. :p

...
can't help you there... since I'm in the same boat. :p

Can't help feeling a bit self concious. Just got a brace fitted..

Can't help feeling a bit self concious. Just got a brace fitted..

Well, don't let the braces bother you. If he really likes you, he won't give a damn about the braces. In fact, I don't see why anyone would care if you had them or not.

Well, don't let the braces bother you. If he really likes you, he won't give a damn about the braces. In fact, I don't see why anyone would care if you had them or not.

I'll try my best. Thanks.
Do you think it's a plus that we're already good friends already?
Sadly, his NationStates account got deleted because his dad was using his computer for work..

I'll try my best. Thanks.
Do you think it's a plus that we're already good friends already?
Sadly, his NationStates account got deleted because his dad was using his computer for work..

Yes it is a plus. and suggest that he asks for a Nation Rezz.

I'll try my best. Thanks.
Do you think it's a plus that we're already good friends already?
Sadly, his NationStates account got deleted because his dad was using his computer for work..

That's a great thing that the two of you are already good friends. That means you two already are comfortable around each other and know each other. So, there's no awkward ''getting to know you'' phase. I knew this girl back in high school, we were friends for years and over time grew closer to each other. We'd subtly flirt with each other, hang out, talk constantly. Then, over the summer she made her move and we talked for a long time about how we felt about each other. Her boyfriend was cold and distant to her and I was always around to cheer her up. So, we began to date and everything was great. We were friends who became something more.

That's a great thing that the two of you are already good friends. That means you two already are comfortable around each other and know each other. So, there's no awkward ''getting to know you'' phase. I knew this girl back in high school, we were friends for years and over time grew closer to each other. We'd subtly flirt with each other, hang out, talk constantly. Then, over the summer she made her move and we talked for a long time about how we felt about each other. Her boyfriend was cold and distant to her and I was always around to cheer her up. So, we began to date and everything was great. We were friends who became something more.

That also makes me feel better. We're always hugging.
Should I do anything for Valentines day or leave it?

Yes it is a plus. and suggest that he asks for a Nation Rezz.

Will do.

Valentines Day, hmm...Will you invite him to this ''get together'' before Valentine's Day? If not, then yes, do something with him.

Here's a cheesy line to use: "I have no one to spend Valentine's Day with, wanna go _____"

Valentines Day, hmm...Will you invite him to this ''get together'' before Valentine's Day? If not, then yes, do something with him.

Here's a cheesy line to use: "I have no one to spend Valentine's Day with, wanna go _____"


I won't have time to do the get together before it. I'm going to a birthday.

And, wow, is that cheesy :p :D

Sadly, several months ago she broke up with me. She'd been suffering from some emotional problems coupled with the fact I was so far away for training in the Navy. Now, I'm single and she's dating some wrestler who's six years older than her:(

I've given up on love. But don't you!

I won't have time to do the get together before it. I'm going to a birthday.

And, wow, is that cheesy :p :D

Then seize the opportunity!

Sadly, several months ago she broke up with me. She'd been suffering from some emotional problems coupled with the fact I was so far away for training in the Navy. Now, I'm single and she's dating some wrestler who's six years older than her:(

I've given up on love. But don't you!

Wow.. that is sad :(
You're in the Navy?

I won't.

Then seize the opportunity!

Don't worry, I will.:D

Wow.. that is sad :(
You're in the Navy?

I won't.

Yes, a tragic tale of star crossed lovers and unseen powers working to rip them apart...and succeeding. Now I'm an irrate cynic who's stationed in Sicily.

Yes, a tragic tale of star crossed lovers and unseen powers working to rip them apart...and succeeding. Now I'm an irrate cynic who's stationed in Sicily.

:eek: Sicily.
Northern Ireland so owns Sicily :D

:eek: Sicily.
Northern Ireland so owns Sicily :D

Fuck off!:upyours:

Just kidding, I always wanted to go to Ireland. Sicily is going pretty well for me.

Fuck off!:upyours:

Just kidding, I always wanted to go to Ireland. Sicily is going pretty well for me.

:eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:
Rude! :p

Ireland is nice.. pretty green.
I've never been to Sicily. You from there?

:eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:
Rude! :p

Ireland is nice.. pretty green.
I've never been to Sicily. You from there?

No, I'm from Pennsylvania.

In my dealings with love a tall, lean young man with rougishly good looks and an infectious personality is always left in the dust. The girl of my dreams seemed more interested in an assholish knuckle dragger *sighs*

No, I'm from Pennsylvania.

Interesting :rolleyes:

Complete subject change, what music do you like?

In my dealings with love a tall, lean young man with rougishly good looks and an infectious personality is always left in the dust. The girl of my dreams seemed more interested in an assholish knuckle dragger *sighs*

Aww..:(

Interesting :rolleyes:

Complete subject change, what music do you like?

I like rock n' roll for the most part, however; basic training denied me any music and now I'll listen to just about anything except for country. You?

I like rock n' roll for the most part, however; basic training denied me any music and now I'll listen to just about anything except for country. You?

I'm a rock and roll fan too, but I like some heavier stuff too.

I'm a rock and roll fan too, but I like some heavier stuff too.

Cool. Sorry for having to listen to me wallow in self pitty. It's been a trying few days for me.

Cool. Sorry for having to listen to me wallow in self pitty. It's been a trying few days for me.

Don't worry about it, I understand.
Any upsides in the past few days?

Don't worry about it, I understand.
Any upsides in the past few days?

I successfully cooked a meal today. Huzzah! Now I don't need a woman. I can already clean, sew, do laundry and now I have conquered the art of cooking.

I successfully cooked a meal today. Huzzah! Now I don't need a woman. I can already clean, sew, do laundry and now I have conquered the art of cooking.

Great. What meal? :p

Edit: You sew? :eek:

I successfully cooked a meal today. Huzzah! Now I don't need a woman. I can already clean, sew, do laundry and now I have conquered the art of cooking.

Ramen ftw.

I have been living off a diet of Red Bull and Ramen soup. One day I stood up and shouted "I'm going to die eating like this!" so I decided to bear down and cook. I broiled two chicken breasts and added some seasoning. Nothing special but it was a success. I don't feel sick so I cooked it properly which is a bonus.

I have been living off a diet of Red Bull and Ramen soup. One day I stood up and shouted "I'm going to die eating like this!" so I decided to bear down and cook. I broiled two chicken breasts and added some seasoning. Nothing special but it was a success. I don't feel sick so I cooked it properly which is a bonus.

Good for you! :D
:eek: .. Red Bull.. :p

Great. What meal? :p

Edit: You sew? :eek:

Yes, I learned how to sew in boot camp. One morning I sewed four buttons back onto my only clean uniform. We were going to have a uniform inspection that day so I hid in a stall in the bathroom, speed sewing the buttons back on my shirt before the drill instructors came in to wake us up.

http://www.gamealbums.com/images/super-mario-brothers-2.gif

Yes, I learned how to sew in boot camp. One morning I sewed four buttons back onto my only clean uniform. We were going to have a uniform inspection that day so I hid in a stall in the bathroom, speed sewing the buttons back on my shirt before the drill instructors came in to wake us up.

Yay. I hate sewing. We're doing it in art right now, and I have some to do for homework in for next Monday.. Can't wait..

Yay. I hate sewing. We're doing it in art right now, and I have some to do for homework in for next Monday.. Can't wait..

What I would give to only have to do that. I have to get up at 4am tomorrow, I am a Master-at-Arms, the Navy's version of military police. My shifts are 12 hours long.

I have been living off a diet of Red Bull and Ramen soup. One day I stood up and shouted "I'm going to die eating like this!" so I decided to bear down and cook. I broiled two chicken breasts and added some seasoning. Nothing special but it was a success. I don't feel sick so I cooked it properly which is a bonus.

If you do it right, ramen is -hardly- soup. :P

What I would give to only have to do that. I have to get up at 4am tomorrow, I am a Master-at-Arms, the Navy's version of military police. My shifts are 12 hours long.

Sadly, I'd love to be in the army.. Swap places please?
I'm an earlybird too. :D

Sadly, I'd love to be in the army.. Swap places please?
I'm an earlybird too. :D

Sure:rolleyes:

I'm not an early bird. I'm more of a mid-aftrenoon person.

Sure:rolleyes:

I'm not an early bird. I'm more of a mid-aftrenoon person.

I wake up in the middle of the night, put it that way. I don't need much sleep.
Ah, you like a lie-in.. :p

I wake up in the middle of the night, put it that way. I don't need much sleep.
Ah, you like a lie-in.. :p

I wish I was like you then.

Ah, young love. I remember back when that young man was me ... way back in the old days ... my, the years seem to go by, don't they?
LoL, you are such an ass Ginny. And I :fluffle: u

Hide in the bushes. Then, when he least expects it, you pounce!

:)
LG is never wrong. Never.

I've yet to meet a girl who would ask a guy out. Sadly, it's always (or almost always) us doing the work. And if you're painfully shy (as I am), it can tend to make things very frustrating.

*sighs*
Hello! *shakes hand* I'm Dubsy, and it's a pleasure to meet you. I would and have asked guys out. For me, its a confidence thing, too, actually. The way I figure it, I'd never go out with anyone if I didn't ask guys out. Also, I'm a firm believer in the rule that it is okay for girls to make the first move, but if they do boys have to make the second. Also, I'm too impatient to be willing to wait for guys to grow the balls to ask me out.

Hear, hear!

Besides, "subtle hints" that women send out are not recognized as such (at least that's what I believe). We men (I can only speak for myself...) simply don't get it. Same goes with saying something in a roundabout way - if you (women) want us to do something, tell us what it is. It saves all of us (men and women) a lot of time and trouble.

Please keep us updated on how it went! ;)
omg, i totally agree. My main rule that I try to remember when dating is "Boys are stupid." Because I don't want to assume that u idiots (I use that term in the most loving way possible) will somehow know what it is I want. I feel especially strongly about this when a guy is doing something you don't like. Tell him he's screwing up, there's no way he's bright enough to figure it out. It isn't his fault. It is just that boys are stupid.

Oh yeah, back on subject of the thread. Walk up to him and ask: "Does this rag smell like cloraphorm?"

That's a sure fire way to get him:D

BACK ON SUBJECT.

LOOK YOU, YOU WOMAN YOU, YOU NEED TO ASK HIM NOW. I'M 17 AND I NEVER HAD A GIRLFRIEND DARN IT, NEVER EVEN KISSED ONE. BY DOING THIS YOU ARE SAVING HIM FROM A LIFE OF MEHNESS. MEHNESS SUCKS. HORRENDOUSLY. GO ASK HIM NOW, LIKE, RIGHT NOW. GO, "LOOK YOU, I WANT YOUR SEX". AND THEN YOU PLAY THE GEORGE MICHAELS SONG THAT GOES I WANT YOUR SEX, AND THEN YOU PLANT A BIG FAT ONE.

I LIKE CAPS.

Well that was refreshing. Anywho, just ask him out, seriously, like right now. Log off. Get out. Go. Leave. >_>

Also, the best way to get to know someone is: to stalk them. You learn so much about someone by watching them from the bushes, taking pictures, rumaging through their garbage, and staring at them...alot

Oh yeah, back on subject of the thread. Walk up to him and ask: "Does this rag smell like cloraphorm?"

That's a sure fire way to get him:D

Love that. xD


BACK ON SUBJECT.
LOOK YOU, YOU WOMAN YOU, YOU NEED TO ASK HIM NOW. I'M 17 AND I NEVER HAD A GIRLFRIEND DARN IT, NEVER EVEN KISSED ONE. BY DOING THIS YOU ARE SAVING HIM FROM A LIFE OF MEHNESS. MEHNESS SUCKS. HORRENDOUSLY. GO ASK HIM NOW, LIKE, RIGHT NOW. GO, "LOOK YOU, I WANT YOUR SEX". AND THEN YOU PLAY THE GEORGE MICHAELS SONG THAT GOES I WANT YOUR SEX, AND THEN YOU PLANT A BIG FAT ONE.

I LIKE CAPS.

Well that was refreshing. Anywho, just ask him out, seriously, like right now. Log off. Get out. Go. Leave. >_>


Sounds good to me. I don't want him to end up.. I.. We.. I'm going to talk to him about it.

[QUOTE=Suzinessums;12300257]Love that. xD

I've done it before...works everytime:D

Sounds good to me. I don't want him to end up.. I.. We.. I'm going to talk to him about it.

For his mental health you should. And to get it out of the way, really. Only thing to worry about is he gives you that Stop lieing to me looks. Tell him you're serious, like, real serious.

omg, i totally agree. My main rule that I try to remember when dating is "Boys are stupid." Because I don't want to assume that u idiots (I use that term in the most loving way possible) will somehow know what it is I want. I feel especially strongly about this when a guy is doing something you don't like. Tell him he's screwing up, there's no way he's bright enough to figure it out. It isn't his fault. It is just that boys are stupid.

As offensive as that sounds, it's entirely correct, and I <3 you for realizing it.

BACK ON SUBJECT.

LOOK YOU, YOU WOMAN YOU, YOU NEED TO ASK HIM NOW. I'M 17 AND I NEVER HAD A GIRLFRIEND DARN IT, NEVER EVEN KISSED ONE. BY DOING THIS YOU ARE SAVING HIM FROM A LIFE OF MEHNESS. MEHNESS SUCKS. HORRENDOUSLY. GO ASK HIM NOW, LIKE, RIGHT NOW. GO, "LOOK YOU, I WANT YOUR SEX". AND THEN YOU PLAY THE GEORGE MICHAELS SONG THAT GOES I WANT YOUR SEX, AND THEN YOU PLANT A BIG FAT ONE.

I LIKE CAPS.

Well that was refreshing. Anywho, just ask him out, seriously, like right now. Log off. Get out. Go. Leave. >_>

<3 you as well.

Love that. xD

I've done it before...works everytime:D

Quoted for truth

For his mental health you should. And to get it out of the way, really. Only thing to worry about is he gives you that Stop lieing to me looks. Tell him you're serious, like, real serious.

I will, I will!

<3 you as well.

I try >>

Well, it has been a pleasure talking and I hope everything goes well with you and that guy. I have a date kit if you need it:

1 bottle of chlorophorm
1 rag
1 camera
1 pair of binoculars
An old van

Talk to you later, hope my advice serves you well...brace face!:p

omg, i totally agree. My main rule that I try to remember when dating is "Boys are stupid." Because I don't want to assume that u idiots (I use that term in the most loving way possible) will somehow know what it is I want. I feel especially strongly about this when a guy is doing something you don't like. Tell him he's screwing up, there's no way he's bright enough to figure it out. It isn't his fault. It is just that boys are stupid.
I prefer the term "men are wired in a very simple way". Thank you, though. :p You're absolutely right!

Maybe he’s just not that into you.
If he’s just shy and he like you, and he isn't doing anything about it, then he’s a pathetic person. I’ve known chicks who thought they’d be happy with the “smart, shy sensitive” type. It never works out.
Well, unless you’re unattractive or something. Beggars can’t be choosers.
Being shy doesnt make you pathetic :rolleyes:

Also, surely there is more to a girl than her appearance?


Throw an Onion at him.
This is the second best advice in this thread, after LGs. Well done.


How do you tell if a guy likes you anway..? :rolleyes:
THANK YOU!!!!

seriously. I need to know. To save myself from future embarassments.

On a more serious note? :p
Yeah, I like this guy, and his writing matches a Valentines card I got last February, but I don't know what to do.
We make lots of eye contact, and hug a lot, but still.. I am confused.
I don't know whether I should go for the direct approach or not, but I think I will.
What is the best way to tell him? :confused:

I wish I could give you advice. But the methods I use usually leave me looking like an idiot, so I'll do your pride a favor and keep my mouth shut and see what everyone else suggests.

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

As a shy guy, I would say go for it. He'll probably go nuts trying to talk to you. Hell, I did. But that's another story. You should save him the trouble.

Being shy doesnt make you pathetic :rolleyes:

Also, surely there is more to a girl than her appearance?



This is the second best advice in this thread, after LGs. Well done.



THANK YOU!!!!

seriously. I need to know. To save myself from future embarassments.



I wish I could give you advice. But the methods I use usually leave me looking like an idiot, so I'll do your pride a favor and keep my mouth shut and see what everyone else suggests.

How do you know if a guy likes you: Are you female? Is he straight? If so, you're already well on your way to a relationship. After you check those two requirements off your list, dry hump him. Go on, do it. Dry hump. If he humps back, and he usually will, you've got a winner. If not, call an ambulance because he's most likely dead.

Really, it's not too hard. Guys are generally very transparent when it comes to who they're interested in, and it's wide-sweeping, so for example, if you posted your picture on these forums and got good responses, chances are you have a chance with pretty much any guy you want.

I wish more girls understood:(
I do, if that is any comfort.

You're right. I've ignored that. I never took that into consideration. Guys do take hints. They're just a little slow at it. And you can lead someone along without busting out and stepping on their toes just because you're impatient. You know, you don't really HAVE to jump right into a full-blown relationship right away. You could get to know someone first. See if maybe there's anything worth pursuing.

Ok, I get what you are saying, but what about many people's concerns about going out with a friend for fear of ruining the friendship? That's where I always seem to get bitten - I honestly fall for guys' personalities, so I dont know I like them until we are firmly in the "Friend Zone" at which point, apparently, it is too late for many guys.

http://www.gamealbums.com/images/super-mario-brothers-2.gif
:confused:
As offensive as that sounds, it's entirely correct, and I <3 you for realizing it.


I realize it sounds offense, and I do it that way to make it lighter and funnier, but its the same both ways. No one is clairvoyant, no one can mindread, and what may be obvious hints to you are likely to be dismissed by the person u are hinting at.

And I <3 you too.

I prefer the term "men are wired in a very simple way". Thank you, though. :p You're absolutely right!
No way, men are not wired in a simple way! You guys are confusing. I think learning Martian would be easier than understanding guys. You just think differently from women and therefore don't see as obvious what we do. Just like we don't get the obvious things you guys do.

How do you know if a guy likes you: Are you female? Is he straight? If so, you're already well on your way to a relationship. After you check those two requirements off your list, dry hump him. Go on, do it. Dry hump. If he humps back, and he usually will, you've got a winner. If not, call an ambulance because he's most likely dead.

Really, it's not too hard. Guys are generally very transparent when it comes to who they're interested in, and it's wide-sweeping, so for example, if you posted your picture on these forums and got good responses, chances are you have a chance with pretty much any guy you want.

OK, yeah, I'm a girl, and yeah he's straight. (Well, technically, bi, but interested in girls, so I assume that is sufficient.) But how does one tell the difference between someone you spend hours talking to because he is a good friend and hours you spend talking to because you are both smitten with each other?

Hey, Dubsy! Get on Gabbly, it's no fun alone.

Being shy doesnt make you pathetic :rolleyes:
Pretty much, yeah. That's one of the determining factors of being pathetic.
Also, surely there is more to a girl than her appearance?
In this circumstance, trying to attract a guy that isn't a complete waste of humanity (though the jury's still out on whether or not this guy is), it is.

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

You know he likes you, but trust me, he doesn't know anything about how you feel about him. So pick a private moment (not in front of everyone) and talk to him. Try to engage him in some subject you both want to talk about. Once you've got that as a foundation, then you can start a little flirting, and shortly thereafter you should ask him out. Trust me, he won't understand that you like him until you make it almost painfully obvious. To a guy like this, rejection is a looming nightmare that threatens to eat your soul. Trust me, I was (and sort of still am) a guy like this.

Just get to the point where you can just walk up to him and talk to him without any discomfort on his part before you start the flirtyness. If you actually have much in common, this will maybe take a couple of weeks. This is also a good way to test if a relationship would actually work out.

No way, men are not wired in a simple way! You guys are confusing. I think learning Martian would be easier than understanding guys. You just think differently from women and therefore don't see as obvious what we do. Just like we don't get the obvious things you guys do.
Speaking Venusian ain't easy, either!

I understand guys get nervous asking guys. But what makes you think it is any less nerve-wracking for a girl? Trust me, it isn't. I mean, yeah, I do it anyway, mostly cuz I have no shame. But that doesn't make it less terrifying. Especially after having been unsuccessful. You shy guys seem so eager to pass of the burden to us girls. Which I mean, I kind of understand, but you need to remember, it is still a burden for us, too.

Also, when you go out one on one with someone, what makes it a date? I half-jokingly calls these outtings with guy friends in whom I am interested nondates. But when does it go from two friends seeing a movie together to being a date?

But yeah, I think the OP should ask him out. But not to a movie. Thats way to serious and date-like. Too much pressure on both of you. Ask him to hang out with you (and maybe some other friends?) where ever it is u like to hang out after school. Personally, I like anyplace where u can challenge him to a game of airhockey, but I'm a bit of an odd duck. Which is, btw, the understatement of the year.

LOOK YOU, YOU WOMAN YOU, YOU NEED TO ASK HIM NOW. I'M 17 AND I NEVER HAD A GIRLFRIEND DARN IT, NEVER EVEN KISSED ONE. BY DOING THIS YOU ARE SAVING HIM FROM A LIFE OF MEHNESS. MEHNESS SUCKS. HORRENDOUSLY. GO ASK HIM NOW, LIKE, RIGHT NOW. GO, "LOOK YOU, I WANT YOUR SEX". AND THEN YOU PLAY THE GEORGE MICHAELS SONG THAT GOES I WANT YOUR SEX, AND THEN YOU PLANT A BIG FAT ONE.

Dude. Seriously. You're 17. Never having had a girlfriend is NOT that tragic. That's what I'm trying to say. It seems a lot of people on here are looking at this from the RIGHT NOW viewpoint. Take it easy a little. Next thing you know, she'll be standing right in front of you with a shy little smirk on her face and you'll know it's time.

Also, the best way to get to know someone is: to stalk them. You learn so much about someone by watching them from the bushes, taking pictures, rumaging through their garbage, and staring at them...alot

It gets a little embarassing when they come out and start yelling about the garbage thing, but the law is the law, right? :D


Ok, I get what you are saying, but what about many people's concerns about going out with a friend for fear of ruining the friendship? That's where I always seem to get bitten - I honestly fall for guys' personalities, so I dont know I like them until we are firmly in the "Friend Zone" at which point, apparently, it is too late for many guys.
*shrugs* I guess that's their problem. I'm not really one to set rules and boundaries. I think it's silly to

No way, men are not wired in a simple way! You guys are confusing. I think learning Martian would be easier than understanding guys. You just think differently from women and therefore don't see as obvious what we do. Just like we don't get the obvious things you guys do.
Here! Here! I get tired of the "Men are just big dumb animals/kids" attitude. Thank you.


OK, yeah, I'm a girl, and yeah he's straight. (Well, technically, bi, but interested in girls, so I assume that is sufficient.) But how does one tell the difference between someone you spend hours talking to because he is a good friend and hours you spend talking to because you are both smitten with each other?Usually from what I've seen, it's a matter of a moment. Stepping a little too close. And somebody goes for it.

I understand guys get nervous asking guys. But what makes you think it is any less nerve-wracking for a girl? Trust me, it isn't. I mean, yeah, I do it anyway, mostly cuz I have no shame. But that doesn't make it less terrifying. Especially after having been unsuccessful. You shy guys seem so eager to pass of the burden to us girls. Which I mean, I kind of understand, but you need to remember, it is still a burden for us, too.

We understand that, but traditionally, all of the burden has been on us. We're calling for equality here. Also, girls are far more likely to not be rejected that guys are, while us poor guys usually have no clue whether a girl likes us or not.

A simple rule about men, If a guy is willing to spend time with you and be your friend, then he wants a relationship with you. Or he's gay. If you have a straight male friend, and he isn't in a relationship, he would probably start one with you in an instant if he thought you were interested.

girls are far more incomprehensible than guys

Well, yeah. If a girlfriend is gonna get mad at you, she should be able to yell at you without breaking down into tears.

Hey, Dubsy! Get on Gabbly, it's no fun alone.

Johnny! hiya babe!
Pretty much, yeah. That's one of the determining factors of being pathetic.

In this circumstance, trying to attract a guy that isn't a complete waste of humanity (though the jury's still out on whether or not this guy is), it is.
Perhaps patheticness is subjective? Perhaps one might think being judgemental of others and embracing archaic ideas of male dominance etc is pathetic?

Also, your second sentence does not make much sense to me. I shall try to infer that what u meant was if a girl wants to date someone who is not a failure at life and waste of oxygen then it is mandatory that she be "attractive." Of course, how one determines if a guy fails at life and if the
girl is attractive is completely subjective as well.

All in all, i think u are full of crap.
Speaking Venusian ain't easy, either!
Exactly. Which is why all guys should think "Girls are brainless" when dating them. Because we need it spelled out just as much as you need us to spell things out for you.

...but I'm a bit of an odd duck. Which is, btw, the understatement of the year.


No, really? ;)

We understand that, but traditionally, all of the burden has been on us. We're calling for equality here. Also, girls are far more likely to not be rejected that guys are, while us poor guys usually have no clue whether a girl likes us or not.

A simple rule about men, If a guy is willing to spend time with you and be your friend, then he wants a relationship with you. Or he's gay. If you have a straight male friend, and he isn't in a relationship, he would probably start one with you in an instant if he thought you were interested.

girls are far more incomprehensible than guys

This is NOT always true, and completely not the case for me. I've been asked out by girls I'm not interested in, and am currently friends with many girls I don't want to go out with. This kind of thinking annoys me so much...

Exactly. Which is why all guys should think "Girls are brainless" when dating them. Because we need it spelled out just as much as you need us to spell things out for you.
Yeah, but when a guy says something, he means what he says (unless it's something stupid that upsets you girls - then we meant something completely different!).
If a girl says something, I have no clue whatsoever what exactly she wants to say!

I mean, I've finally understood that "It would be nice" means "I want you to", but other than that... "Some time" could mean either "now" or "never", and so on...

This is NOT always true, and completely not the case for me. I've been asked out by girls I'm not interested in, and am currently friends with many girls I don't want to go out with. This kind of thinking annoys me so much...

then either you are very much an exception, or my perceptions are very skewed indeed. This has always been true of myself and most of the other guys I know.

We understand that, but traditionally, all of the burden has been on us. We're calling for equality here. Also, girls are far more likely to not be rejected that guys are, while us poor guys usually have no clue whether a girl likes us or not.

A simple rule about men, If a guy is willing to spend time with you and be your friend, then he wants a relationship with you. Or he's gay. If you have a straight male friend, and he isn't in a relationship, he would probably start one with you in an instant if he thought you were interested.

girls are far more incomprehensible than guys

Even if what you say is true, it doesn't matter if the girls don't recognize that they are less likely to be rejected. The fear of rejection is very real, even if the threat of it may not be.

Besides which, we (ok, maybe just I) fall for guys that are way outta my league. Experience tells me that there are straight, single guys who are more discriminating than you seem to think all men are. And the continuation of this false myth could lead some with already worrisome self esteem to think that someone would not want to go out with her, despite being single and friends, means that there is something hideously wrong with her.

So please, unless you honestly believe 100% of the time that it is true, stop continuing this myth.

Even if what you say is true, it doesn't matter if the girls don't recognize that they are less likely to be rejected. The fear of rejection is very real, even if the threat of it may not be.

Besides which, we (ok, maybe just I) fall for guys that are way outta my league. Experience tells me that there are straight, single guys who are more discriminating than you seem to think all men are. And the continuation of this false myth could lead some with already worrisome self esteem to think that someone would not want to go out with her, despite being single and friends, means that there is something hideously wrong with her.

So please, unless you honestly believe 100% of the time that it is true, stop continuing this myth.

Ok, I suppose you're right, though the poster above is the first time I've heard of it being false.

No, really? ;)
Oh shuddup geezer. You know you <3 me. :fluffle:

This is NOT always true, and completely not the case for me. I've been asked out by girls I'm not interested in, and am currently friends with many girls I don't want to go out with. This kind of thinking annoys me so much...
Thank you!

Yeah, but when a guy says something, he means what he says (unless it's something stupid that upsets you girls - then we meant something completely different!).
If a girl says something, I have no clue whatsoever what exactly she wants to say!

I mean, I've finally understood that "It would be nice" means "I want you to", but other than that... "Some time" could mean either "now" or "never", and so on...
You need a girl translator. *nods* It should be noted, there are many dialects of Girl, so even if you have a translator, it isn't fullproof. Your best bet, though, is to date a girl who tries to say what she means. Otherwise it is virtually hopeless.

Cause most of us are shy guys :p
QFT

Ok. I have a question...

Why does this have to start out as dating? What if...You just went and started hanging out? Then you could give him the time to adjust and get his bearings.

I really think if he is that quiet withdrawn type that making the first move is probably a really bad idea. Possibly unforgiveable in his mind.

You already know what you want. Let him figure out for himself.

Listen people, I'm a shy guy, and I can tell you completely that THIS WORKS. Shy guys like me don't like to be asked out if we don't even know the person! You have to start out as friends of us, otherwise you will get absolutely NO WHERE.

You need a girl translator. *nods* It should be noted, there are many dialects of Girl, so even if you have a translator, it isn't fullproof. Your best bet, though, is to date a girl who tries to say what she means. Otherwise it is virtually hopeless.
http://www.studip.uni-goettingen.de/pictures/smile/cry3.gif I know...

http://www.studip.uni-goettingen.de/pictures/smile/cry3.gif I know...

No worries. Eventually girls usually realize its their fault for forgetting that Boys are Dumb, and they dont hold it against you, because you cant help being dumb, and they shouldve remembered to make it clearer. If they don't, i'd write them off as idiots and bitches on not mind the loss. But thats just me . . .

Perhaps patheticness is subjective? Perhaps one might think being judgemental of others and embracing archaic ideas of male dominance etc is pathetic?
Male dominance? Hardly. Ideas of assertive dominance, perhaps, but that's how things tend to work out anyway.
Someone, anyone, who is too "shy" to get out and seize what they want is pathetic. They'll never have anything worth having.
Also, your second sentence does not make much sense to me. I shall try to infer that what u meant was if a girl wants to date someone who is not a failure at life and waste of oxygen then it is mandatory that she be "attractive." Of course, how one determines if a guy fails at life and if the
girl is attractive is completely subjective as well.
It's the same for guys as well, except we have the good fortune of being more likely to be independently wealthy, which for some reason makes people more attractive.
As an extremely unattractive individual, I can say that I don’t much like it, but that’s the way things are.
All in all, i think u are full of crap.
Live in a fantasy world. Whatever.

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

NO! Do not go for subtlety. He won't get it at all, unless he is exceptionally perceptive for a high school boy when it comes to women. I was a shy guy in high school, and I know I didn't understand any subtle clues or anything like that at all. If you want him to ask you out, your best bet is to make your flirtations fairly blatant. From what you say, it sounds like he's probably like I was and trying to get up the nerve to go talk to you is... well... scary. If you already want to go out with him, you could even ask him out yourself. At the very least, if you're sure he likes you and you like him back to some extent and want to encourage him, go and make pleasant conversation with him. Be sure to smile a lot, such will boost his confidence.

I know it's a generalization, but in my experience, it's true. Guys, especially those in high school, rarely read subtle hints and such. For the most part, in our society, we are not conditioned to be particularly subtle, since from an early age, males tend to be direct with each other and so are not trained to send or understand subtle messages. It isn't to say that no guys can, just that most guys in high school don't. It's not inherent, just in how we grow up in our society.

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.
Ask him out or if you're in a particularly impatient mood just give him a kiss in a private moment.

Ask him out or if you're in a particularly impatient mood just give him a kiss in a private moment.

Yeah, both of those are pretty clear indicators of one's interest.

If he’s just shy and he like you, and he isn't doing anything about it, then he’s a pathetic person.
How, exactly, young man?

I hope you understood. Anyway, just go and ASK HIM OUT. Dont say its a date, dont say you want to be his girlfriend or he will freak out. Just ask him out to go see a movie.

Going to a film isn't a great one when you don't know him that well.

Being shy doesnt make you pathetic :rolleyes:

Also, surely there is more to a girl than her appearance?

Take it with an industrial-sized barrel of salt. This is the same boy who said that "women never get together with their friends unless they were attracted to them from day 1."

Walk up to the guy and ask him out. I used to be shy, but now I'm just like fuck it and ask people I like to go out with me.

Of course, I'm a guy, so I'm stereotypically supposed to do this.

Take it with an industrial-sized barrel of salt. This is the same boy who said that "women never get together with their friends unless they were attracted to them from day 1."

That's really just patently false. Seriously, it's US patent number fucking two-thousand-fifty-nine. That's how patently false it is. It's copyrighted too, the Disney company owns it and that's how they keep getting copyright extensions.

speaking as a shy guy, ask him for school help. say a couple of problems here and there, talk about the assignment...

from there, you can steer the conversation towards other things. find out his interests and what not (be prepared for one word answers... that doesn't mean he's not interested.)

keep it at that point for about a week or so, then set up a study date. that will get me... him... used to seeing you outside of school.

if you find that he is interesting and you return his feelings, then go to the movies (dutch) that will continue to build up his confidence. when he's ready, he'll start asking you out.

Shy people, or at least in my experience, tend to lack self confidence in social settings. go slow and he'll catch on.


this is great advice!
i wish a certain girl had been given this exact advice when i was young and shy.
i only found out 15 years later...after a divorce..that the girl i dreamed of,really liked me for me.
oh well.

great advice there junii.

Male dominance? Hardly. Ideas of assertive dominance, perhaps, but that's how things tend to work out anyway.
Someone, anyone, who is too "shy" to get out and seize what they want is pathetic. They'll never have anything worth having.
Agreed. It'd be easier for me to do so though if I were straight (or simply female)... with guys it's hard to tell what their sexuality is, except in the case of extremes (and even that is now becoming a nonfactor).

It's the same for guys as well, except we have the good fortune of being more likely to be independently wealthy, which for some reason makes people more attractive.
As an extremely unattractive individual, I can say that I don’t much like it, but that’s the way things are.
Unattractive as in not wealthy, or what?

Live in a fantasy world. Whatever.
Adopting my indifference tactic? :D

http://www.gamealbums.com/images/super-mario-brothers-2.gif

:confused:

what? somebody asked what to do about shy guys. i graphically illustrated.

this is great advice!
i wish a certain girl had been given this exact advice when i was young and shy.
i only found out 15 years later...after a divorce..that the girl i dreamed of,really liked me for me.
oh well.

great advice there junii.

Awwwwww. Did she still like you?

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

I shall now propose my 2 theories, each with a different approach.

Method 1- Shy but direct: Talk to the guy for some time alone about a topic. Then, when you are about to leave, ask him to go out sometime, making it seem like it's awkward for you.

Method 2- Direct and respectful: Take the guy aside and ask him to go do something (MOVIE) and try your luck there. Less awkwardness than 1 but still respectful.

what? somebody asked what to do about shy guys. i graphically illustrated.

*hands you the biggest bag of weed ever*

*hands you the biggest bag of weed ever*

now that sounds like a challenge

what? somebody asked what to do about shy guys. i graphically illustrated.

Jump on shy guys so that they fall off log bridges? That doesn't seem very nice. . .

Jump on shy guys so that they fall off log bridges? That doesn't seem very nice. . .

Actually, you jump on them, grab them, jump, and lift them over your head, then you toss them off the bridge.

Or toss them off of anything, really.

Jump on shy guys so that they fall off log bridges? That doesn't seem very nice. . .

actually, jumping on their heads just allows you to ride them. you have to physically pick them up and throw them off the bridge.

actually, jumping on their heads just allows you to ride them. you have to physically pick them up and throw them off the bridge.

Actually, you jump on them, grab them, jump, and lift them over your head, then you toss them off the bridge.

Or toss them off of anything, really.

well played

Actually, you jump on them, grab them, jump, and lift them over your head, then you toss them off the bridge.

Or toss them off of anything, really.

Unless you are playing Yoshi's Island in which case you can eat them or jump on them.

Unless you are playing Yoshi's Island in which case you can eat them or jump on them.

True, true. But, the image was from SMB 2, so I went with that method. :p

Unless you are playing Yoshi's Island in which case you can eat them or jump on them.

the eating them method is hereby declared "also acceptable"

Awwwwww. Did she still like you?


actually...yes,which makes it even more pathetic.

a few months back
i ran into her at a bar,i was a bit loose,i told her from 8th grade on i worshipped her from afar,that i often thought about her.
she is married now,but felt the same way..back then the guy had to make the first move..i did not.
we spent the night talking,we have so much in common it kills me.we have kept in touch since.
she is not happy with her marriage(ergo being in the bar by herself)but has a child,and wants to make it work for the kid(her parents divorced and pulled the games idiots pull with kids)
and i will never be "that" guy...the guy that breaks up a marriage.

keep in mind,we have had mutual friends all these years,and have seen eachother at parties and such..but i never told her how i felt till recently....pretty sad.

i just wish i had told her how i felt all those years ago,which i think the girl here(op)should.
nowadays it is ok to have a girl ask a guy out,back when i was young,it wasn't.
i should have manned up in retrospect...but i didn't and regret it to this day.

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

Erm, do you live in the US perhaps?

actually...yes,which makes it even more pathetic.

a few months back
i ran into her at a bar,i was a bit loose,i told her from 8th grade on i worshipped her from afar,that i often thought about her.
she is married now,but felt the same way..back then the guy had to make the first move..i did not.
we spent the night talking,we have so much in common it kills me.we have kept in touch since.
she is not happy with her marriage(ergo being in the bar by herself)but has a child,and wants to make it work for the kid(her parents divorced and pulled the games idiots pull with kids)
and i will never be "that" guy...the guy that breaks up a marriage.

keep in mind,we have had mutual friends all these years,and have seen eachother at parties and such..but i never told her how i felt till recently....pretty sad.

i just wish i had told her how i felt all those years ago,which i think the girl here(op)should.
nowadays it is ok to have a girl ask a guy out,back when i was young,it wasn't.
i should have manned up in retrospect...but i didn't and regret it to this day.


Aw, man, I'm sorry to hear that. I may have missed opportunities in high school, but from the way it sounds, nothing like that. I guess your experience serves as a lesson to the young then.

Very honorable of you to refuse to be "that" guy though. Don't blame yourself if her marriage doesn't work out anyway, though.

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

How old are you? Geesh, what is with the writing? If you are writing your age, you have extra hormones to be thinking about dates already.

It should be thus:
"My dilema is this: a guy at school (I'm/I am a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He won't just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likely going to get imtimidated by me if I just go over to him because we haven't/have not talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment."

I know my writing is full of mistakes, but geesh, you must have been in a hurry.

A simple rule about men, If a guy is willing to spend time with you and be your friend, then he wants a relationship with you. Or he's gay.

Nonsense. I've liked lots of females independently of wanting a relationship with them.

We're not that simple, sorry.

girls are far more incomprehensible than guys

I'm pretty sure it's for the most part only males who make this claim.

Most of the time people, male or female, are comprehensible with a little common sense and empathy. (Now, the will to act on that comprehension... that's another story entirely.)

How old are you? Geesh, what is with the writing? If you are writing your age, you have extra hormones to be thinking about dates already.

It should be thus:
"My dilema is this: a guy at school (I'm/I am a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He won't just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likely going to get imtimidated by me if I just go over to him because we haven't/have not talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment."

I know my writing is full of mistakes, but geesh, you must have been in a hurry.

That said, I STRONGLY approve of your nation.

Nonsense. I've liked lots of females independently of wanting a relationship with them.

We're not that simple, sorry.



I'm pretty sure it's for the most part only males who make this claim.

Most of the time people, male or female, are comprehensible with a little common sense and empathy. (Now, the will to act on that comprehension... that's another story entirely.)

Well, they think on a differnt level. Men and women reason differntly. Women are much more sensitive.

Well, they think on a differnt level. Men and women reason differntly.

The difference is not great enough to make the usual tools of understanding others useless.

Of course, you can't simply ask "What would I do in this situation?", but then, you never really can. You are much better asking, "What would I feel in this situation?" and then actually being honest with yourself, and taking into account the fact that people respond to emotions in different ways.

Women are much more sensitive.

Maybe... or maybe men just like to pretend they aren't sensitive when they really are.

Maybe... or maybe men just like to pretend they aren't sensitive when they really are.

Well, being one, I have to say they are sensitive about dumb things. But sensitive like women? Well, no-one can put half of the human race in a box, but I'd say overall, they aren't as affected by things.
A women for instance, is much more likely to cry, while men are more susceptable to emotions like anger, which women have relatively no trouble with.

FIRST OF ALL WHEN THE #%#@@ DID I POST THIS?
I am not a girl...
I like girls...
I have no recollection of ever starting this thread at all. But holy crap the response is amazing.
OMG...wait a minute...How the hell did she get my password? I just read a bunch of those posts and realized, the only person I know that could have geussed my password is the girl that I like...
Well this development is actually a benefit then. I geuss that I dont have to worry about her saying 'No' when I ask her out tomorrow.

That said, I STRONGLY approve of your nation.
Thank You Very Much.

A women for instance, is much more likely to cry,

This does not necessarily mean they are more sensitive. It could just as easily mean that they are more likely to express their feelings in certain ways - and since crying is highly socially taboo for males, it makes perfect sense that that would be the case.

which women have relatively no trouble with.

:confused:

FIRST OF ALL WHEN THE #%#@@ DID I POST THIS?
I am not a girl...
I like girls...
I have no recollection of ever starting this thread at all. But holy crap the response is amazing.
OMG...wait a minute...How the hell did she get my password? I just read a bunch of those posts and realized, the only person I know that could have geussed my password is the girl that I like...
Well this development is actually a benefit then. I geuss that I dont have to worry about her saying 'No' when I ask her out tomorrow.

If this is true, it's the most amazing plot twist ever....

If this is true, it's the most amazing plot twist ever....
I know.
It is true, unless I have schizophrenia (Sorry about bad spelling) and typed it up during some sort of episode...
Well, Im not really as shy as she said. During the week we got off school for exam week (I only had one) I went to the city with my parents for my Mom's 40th B-Day. While I was there we stayed at my Dad's friends house and I slept with his daughter 3 nights in a row. I made out with her, but nothing more...I am speaking the truth. (<--BEST WEEKEND EVER)

I declare shenanigans. :rolleyes:

If this is true, it's the most amazing plot twist ever....


damn...this could be a movie of the week,after school special and what not.

joking aside...

it is very difficult to pigeon hole men and women,as much as we like to.
i am pretty confident now,but i never was when it realy mattered..my bad.

i cry at movies,and i try to hide it from my son if he is around.i weep like a bitch(theres a stereotype)when i am alone.
i am sensitive about most things,but act like i am mister cool in public.
that alone requires a special someone to understand the nuances of me..and that is not around the corner,and i am pretty confident..i cant imagine a youngster that is shy,especially nowadays.
it is difficult for the tougher ones amongst us,let alone the shy guy.

i am not saying girls are not insecure or shy..but it is fucking hard for a guy to exspress their inner self..moreso then it is for girls.

i am listening to kiss me, by sixpence and none the richer at the moment.
i wish i had the balls or the confidence to ask my friend to just kiss me..when i was young...it may have changed my life.
but i didnt,so i am sitting alone,crying about what could have been....other things have been good,and i do love my ex....but i cant stop thinking that my friend was the one...and all i needed to do was just ask her.
we were a match made in heaven....but alas...it was not to be...because i was to chicken shit to open my mouth.

i have had enough of self flagellation for the night..lol...i hope the op tells the boy/girl she likes them..you never know how happy you can be.
or at least you never know till you try.
the momentary rejection you might feel is nothing compared to the i shoulda 10 years from now.


now i am listening to dreams from the cranberries...i must like pain..lol

ask him out,ask him for help...all guys want to help...real guys that is.

Walk up to him and whisper in his ear "Want a blowjob?".

Hot.

I declare shenanigans. :rolleyes:

Well...
I dont care whether you believe me or not. I know the truth.
I am not attempting to insult you in any way by this:
Why would I do that? Pretend I was a girl then change later. It makes no sense.
OR
If you are refering to the event in the city. As I said earlier I know the truth.

I'm not buying any of this. Sorry.

*reads last pages*

...

LIEZZZ!

Like I said I dont care if you believe me or not.
I know the truth.
I lie as little as possible and I assure you that I speak the truth about this. The girl I like is the only person that could have geussed my password.

Just so you all know Im not going to respond to any arguements about whether this is a truth or lie. I will allow you to believe what you will.

...

Liezzz...

Like I said I dont care if you believe me or not.
I know the truth.
I lie as little as possible and I assure you that I speak the truth about this. The girl I like is the only person that could have geussed my password.

Just so you all know Im not going to respond to any arguements about whether this is a truth or lie. I will allow you to believe what you will.

Haha.

You're really bad at lying.

If this is true, it's the most amazing plot twist ever....

and makes my mario 2 reference all the better

Take it from me, i'm a shy guy. If he is shy and doesn't speak with you, or willining interact with you, let him be.

My dilema is this. A guy at school (im a girl) I can tell he likes me. He is smart and all that, but he is really shy when it comes to girls. He wont just come over and flirt becuase of it. He is most likly going to get imtimdated by me if I just go over to him because we havent talked much in the past two years at school. I was wondering if there was a more subtle way I could go about it to save him any embarassment.

Maybe you should make friends with Jesus first so he can save your soul when you have pre-martial sex.

Jump on his head.












Sorry about that.
Which one?;)

On the upside, if OP is actually telling the truth, he might be getting a blowjob soon...

On the upside, if OP is actually telling the truth, he might be getting a blowjob soon...
Gay action?:eek:

Gay action?:eek:

No, the OP is apparently a guy, whose account was hacked by a girl. The girl wanted advice on how to approach the OP, and someone advised her to give him a blowjob...

FIRST OF ALL WHEN THE #%#@@ DID I POST THIS?

WTF?? Same thing happened to me today! I log on for the first time since last October and somebody has made over 3000 dumbass posts with my logon!

WTF?? Same thing happened to me today! I log on for the first time since last October and somebody has made over 3000 dumbass posts with my logon!

sorry about that

roffle.

Don't be afraid to experiment young man.

Just stay away from my bum.

FIRST OF ALL WHEN THE #%#@@ DID I POST THIS?
I am not a girl...
I like girls...
I have no recollection of ever starting this thread at all. But holy crap the response is amazing.
OMG...wait a minute...How the hell did she get my password? I just read a bunch of those posts and realized, the only person I know that could have geussed my password is the girl that I like...
Well this development is actually a benefit then. I geuss that I dont have to worry about her saying 'No' when I ask her out tomorrow.
:eek: Wow. That is so cool!

No, the OP is apparently a guy, whose account was hacked by a girl. The girl wanted advice on how to approach the OP, and someone advised her to give him a blowjob...
Neat.
FIRST OF ALL WHEN THE #%#@@ DID I POST THIS?
I am not a girl...
I like girls...
I have no recollection of ever starting this thread at all. But holy crap the response is amazing.
OMG...wait a minute...How the hell did she get my password? I just read a bunch of those posts and realized, the only person I know that could have geussed my password is the girl that I like...
Well this development is actually a benefit then. I geuss that I dont have to worry about her saying 'No' when I ask her out tomorrow.


Thank You Very Much.
I wish i knew someone who cared about me this much...
So i could reject them, suckers.