NationStates Jolt Archive

What do you think the most badass suicide would be?

If I off myself, I'm backflipping off of a skyscraper.

Anyone else?

What do you think the most badass suicide would be?

If I off myself, I'm backflipping off of a skyscraper.

Anyone else?

Nah, running straight for the moving gears of a combine harvester is way more bad-ass than that.

Shooting yourself in the heart with a pistol.

diving into a running jet engine would be pretty spectacular.

I think the most badass suicide would be like this:

I'm skydiving without a parachute. I have my MP3 player and a cape. What am I listening to you may ask?

The Superman Theme Song by John Williams. All the way down.

Nah, running straight for the moving gears of a combine harvester is way more bad-ass than that.

Strapping rockets to your back and... well you get the picture.

Nah, running straight for the moving gears of a combine harvester is way more bad-ass than that.

I don't know man... splat vs. squelsh? Plus, theres a much greater chance of taking a bystander or two with the skyscraper way.

convincing all of your followers to die along with you, a la Jonestown

I think the most badass suicide would be jumping off a building with a bomb of some kind strapped to you. That way, people remember you for years!

Firearms FTW
Suicide by cops. No! Special agents. No! The national guard!
Just walk into a crowd and start shooting and keep it up 'till the big guns are called in.
...
I got one better. It involves heights.
1. Get a LOT of explosives. The more the better.
2. Hook up a detonator to an altimeter. Set it for 100-200 feet. That will give you good dispersion.
3. Mix vaseline and gasoline in a bucket.
4. Find a really tall building. Something like the World Trade Center (not anymore, but you get the idea) is perfect and is in a sufficiently crowded area to generate the proper sized crowd.
5. Get an extra large trench coat, ski mask, duct tape and a lighter.
6. Bring your materials to the top of your building. Liberally apply the vaseline-gasoline mixture to your entire body. Duct tape the explosives around your legs, arms, head and torso. The more explosives you use, the better. Attach the altimeter to the explosives.
7. Put on the trench coat and mask so that the explosives are not visible.
8. Start ranting and throwing things so that you are sure to attract notice. Drag this part out as long as possible. Say anything that comes to mind but try to stay away from real problems. Your love life DOES NOT make for a good sound bite. Ask for news cameras from the major networks. Pace around a lot while waving your arms.
9. DO NOT let on that you have explosives on your body. The police will clear the area and you definitely don't want that.
10. When you've gotten the crowd to a fevered pitch, when the helicopters are hovering like vultures, whip off the jacket and set yourself on fire.
11. Wait until you are completely engulfed in flame then jump.
12. Try to steer yourself towards the crowd. That way flaming falling body parts will pelt the fleeing onlookers when you explode.
13. Congratulations! You've just made history.

An easier would be death by hairball.

Get a cat or a dog and brush it every day. Save the hair until you have a giant hairball. Plug up your nose then shove the hairball into your mouth.

Leave a cryptic note about how you believe little Fluffy or Rover was planning to kill you in your sleep.

Master Shake did it best.

Take an ass-load of sleeping pills; put your mouth around a hose leading to the muffler of a running car and jump into a pool full of starving piranhas.

Personally, the way I wanna go out is a chimera of the most badass deaths in existance.

Step one: Light self on fire. Fire is important because it makes you bright, highly visible, and with the next part gives you the appearance of the Human Torch from the Fantastic Four.
Step two: Run screaming off a skyscraper. Other high areas are potentially feasible, but they lack the traffic halting end of a good skyscraper.
Step three: Decapitate yourself on the way down. This is essential, because decapitation is old fashioned badassery.
Step four: Hit ground. Go boom. The higher the building, the more successful the final pasty touchdown. You wanna be like peanut butter on toast when you touch down. The street cleaners have got to be cleaning up your sorry ass for the next few weeks. Gives that lasting effect that'll have you remembered for longer than a few days.

If you're really lucky, your flaming head will hover away from your body and end up through the window of the skyscraper across the street, potentially causing mass chaos in two places.

I plan to die of old age, suicide by geriatricism (is that a word?)

Damn you all. I've got to think of a more original idea. Skyscrapers all of a sudden seem all too common.

Perhaps a mine-shaft?

Slamming your head into the pavement until death is the manliest way to kill yourself, if I can remember correctly.

Slamming your head into the pavement until death is the manliest way to kill yourself, if I can remember correctly.

What about eating a bath tub full of beans?

I think the most badass suicide would be like this:

I'm skydiving without a parachute. I have my MP3 player and a cape. What am I listening to you may ask?

The Superman Theme Song by John Williams. All the way down.

I think that one wins.

Damn you all. I've got to think of a more original idea. Skyscrapers all of a sudden seem all too common.

Perhaps a mine-shaft?
The point of a spectacular suicide is to grab the attention of the masses and scare them shitless. Jumping down a mineshaft will look like a retarded accident.

Try finding a sausage making company that has a giant meat grinder. Set up a hidden video camera to tape your death. Leave a will with explicit instructions that it not be read until one year after the night of your grinding. In it, detail the way you died and the location of the hidden camera.

Sneak in at night naked and turn on the video camera. Climb into the grinder and take massive amounts of pills of your choice. Make sure it is enough to kill you.

In the morning you will be ground up and made into sausages. One year later your will, will be read to the news media and people all around the nation will vomit simultaneously.
---
The abundance of media outlets these days has afforded a nearly infinite number of ways to relay your message of doom and despair while consequently minimizing the impact. No longer can you be assured a sizable audience for the ranting and pontificating that so often accompany political/ecological/religious movements.

"Oh, whatever can I do?!" you may be wailing. "The world is coming to an end. Death and despair loom on the horizon. [Insert your hated adversary's name here] is the embodiment of evil. He/she/they/it is/are/will be the antichrist/destruction of us all/black death come to haunt us/etc."

"How can I get my cause the attention it deserves?" you ask. The answer is simple: A futile pointless violent act displayed to millions on the evening news.

Chop Your Own Head Off While Standing Next to a Major World Leader

1. Ingratiate yourself with your chosen mark. Get his/her/its confidence. Become a trusted member of the inner circle.
2. Sew a hand ax into a coat or jacket so that it is easily removable but not particularly visible.
3. Make a statement. Video tape is preferable because the TV news shows love visuals. The more visual material they have the better. The next best thing would be audio tape. It won't hold an audience as well but at least it can be played under the video of your death. Never write a letter. No one reads anymore. No one will care. Make sure your message will be easily found on your corpse.
4. On the day of a major rally, with hundreds or thousands of attendees and lots of television cameras, wear the coat with the hand ax attached.
5. Send backup copies of your message to as many news outlets as you can on the appointed day.
6. Stand in the background as you remove the ax from the coat. When you are finished move slowly toward your dignitary.
7. As the event reaches its climax, whip out the ax and lop off your own head. If possible try to run around like a chicken. Make sure to get as much blood on the famous person as possible. Aim well. That will be the image that gets the news coverage.
8. Bask in your glorious death. You've made the supreme sacrifice to save the world and have ended the torment that was your existence.
---
Sometimes you want to do something violent and bloody but you just don't have the wherewithal to assemble a cache of assault weapons. This method is simple and convenient for those on limited budgets.

1. Make a small incision in your stomach.
2. Pull out your intestines.
3. Hang yourself with the intestines.
4. A cryptic note about aliens might be a nice touch.
---
Anyone with half a brain hates the Thanksgiving to Christmas season. There is too much family. Too many happy annoying people demanding things from you. Too much forced joy specials on television. And WAY too many repetitions of songs you've been listening to since childhood.

The only way to escape this recurring nightmare is to:

1. If you have any investments, convert them to money. Take all your money and loose it playing online poker. This is especially important if you are well off. Don't tell family members and other greedy people that would profit from your demise. After you die, they will go crazy trying to find the missing money. They may even kill each other. This will bring you some satisfaction, in hell.
2. Now, stick your head in the turkey just after it comes out of the oven, preferably during the Christmas Day family gathering but a Thanksgiving Day end may also serve your purposes. Your timing really depends on your own peculiar circumstances.
3. Run around banging into family members all the while flailing your arms. You can never go wrong flailing your arms when trying to kill your self. The more flailing the better.
4. Go into a room that can be easily locked so you won't be accidently saved by well meaning but inconsiderate friends or family members.
[Alternatively you can just flee the house and run through the streets aimlessly until you pass out. NO ONE in a large city will ever go near someone with a steaming turkey on his head. If you live in a wooded or rural area the best thing to do would be to run off into the wilderness so your body can be found with all sorts of gnaw marks on it from the multitude of animals that will flock to your decaying carcass (and the turkey's too).]
5. An interesting footnote to this holiday might be to swallow a large number of Christmas ornaments (lights, small Santa dolls, actual fruit cake) before you follow your bliss. Give your family and friends (if you have either) something to discuss the following year.

If TV and teh interwebz have taught me anything it's that suicide is funny.

Holding you're breath.

1. Clawing off your own face with a hammer.

or

2. Go to KFC. Order 1000 pieces of original recipe. Eat till your colon explodes.

From bash.org (http://bash.org/?488793):

<evilada>: Best suicide plan ever
<mcm310>: what is it?
<evilada>: you go up to the top of a roof
<evilada>: string piano wire tight across the front edge at neck level
<evilada>: tie a cord to your foot and the other end to the building so that you'll be above sidewalk level when its fully stretched
<evilada>: then you put super glue on your hands
<evilada>: and put your arms around the front of the wire and then back to touch your head
<evilada>: then you lean forward, so the piano wire cuts your neck but not your elbows
<evilada>: when the cord goes taut, youll be hanging upside down with no head....except your head will be in your outstretched arms thanks to gravity and the glue, staring at someone upside down and spewing blood everywhere.
<evilada>: And some poor bastard will be traumatized for LIFE.
<mcm310>: i dont think i can be your friend anymore

Muahahahaha...

From bash.org (http://bash.org/?488793):



Muahahahaha...

That's classic.

shotgun to the back of the head. quick and painless, pretty badass.

From bash.org (http://bash.org/?488793):



Muahahahaha...

Thats up there.

Autoerotic asphyxiation, Michael Hutchence style.


Only with the intention of suicide.

From bash.org (http://bash.org/?488793):

Muahahahaha...

Beautiful.

My original favorite is to toast marshmallows under the rocket exhaust of the space shuttle as it takes off. :)

But I think streaking onto a NASCAR track and getting obliterated by twenty cars at 180 mph would be pretty groovy. :)

I always thought opening your bely with a knife was badass enough. And then getting all your bely contents outside of your body and show everyone. And you end it by asking a friend to cut your head with a katana.

Custers last stand.

Aiming a waterpistol at the president.

Be Envy, and goad a cop into becoming Wrath (by decapitating his pregnant wife).

How to commit suicide for most people, but not for a Toyota Hilux.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRZzkrLSXj0

I'd probably go for jumping off a tall building, but that wouldn't work for the Hilux either.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h0Fzrsf4G2I

I plan to die of old age, suicide by geriatricism (is that a word?)
My prefered method.

My sister has sworn for years that when she turns 45 she's going to get drunk on ouzo and jump off a cliff in Greece.

Forcibly buggering a male member of the Saudi Royal family in Mecca during Ramadan...

Setting yourself on fire in protest of oppression.

Going back in time and killing your younger self.

But as that was not on the poll, I think I'll go for the backflipping off a skyscraper.

http://www.uberg33k.com/albums/bunnies/0175ep.sized.jpg

There's more here: http://www.uberg33k.com/gallery/view_album.php?set_albumName=bunnies

...at least no one has mentioned Chuck Norris yet...

Here's mine:

Set up a Pancor Jackhammer to fire all of it's rounds when I press a button. I stand in front of the Pancor at a distance so that I will be hit full force by each round.

You know that'd be cool.

Now then...

*Runs away before people start remembering his emo days*

I think that one wins.

I feel the love :D

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=manly_suicide

BAM.

End of discussion.

Suprised I haven't heard this one come up. The less sick minded; look away now.

Death by a thousand cuts:

1) Make a sorta net out of cheesewire, big enough that you can stretch yourself out on it no problem.
2) Get large batteries (not enough p.d. to kill you though) and connect them to the cheese wire.
3) Lie on the cheesewire.

The result is that the electric current makes your body jolt all over the place, meaning you cut yourself all over MANY MANY times. Quite quickly you will fall unconscious, but keep jolting, leaving an excessively bloody mess for your family to come home to. What could be more hardcore?

1. have sex with hundreds of women/men till you die

2. just will yourself to drop dead

3. go on a killing spree, see how many people you can take out till the cops take you down

Suprised I haven't heard this one come up. The less sick minded; look away now.

Death by a thousand cuts:

1) Make a sorta net out of cheesewire, big enough that you can stretch yourself out on it no problem.
2) Get large batteries (not enough p.d. to kill you though) and connect them to the cheese wire.
3) Lie on the cheesewire.

The result is that the electric current makes your body jolt all over the place, meaning you cut yourself all over MANY MANY times. Quite quickly you will fall unconscious, but keep jolting, leaving an excessively bloody mess for your family to come home to. What could be more hardcore?

Hold your breath:
Manliness: 9 Style: 3 Awesomeness: 8 Mess: 0


What you need: balls.

How to do it: this is similar to strangling yourself, but the difficulty level is hard. Harder than a priest at a playground.


Step 1: Hold your breath.
Step 2: Wait 10 minutes, then go to step 3.
Step 3: If you are reading this, you have failed.

Feeding yourself feet-first through a meatgrinder while drinking a Jim Beam and muriatic acid cocktail and beating off to a bikini girls with machine guns video.

The Prime Minister or President of somewhere in the West meeting with the entire government of China. He is wearing a massive bomb. He lets it fly. He has it planned out so that his blood will spell out "Now they are gone... REBEL!" And democracy is brought to China...

Or World War Three starts.

Still, causing World War Three would be pretty badass....

The point of a spectacular suicide is to grab the attention of the masses and scare them shitless. Jumping down a mineshaft will look like a retarded accident.

Try finding a sausage making company that has a giant meat grinder. Set up a hidden video camera to tape your death. Leave a will with explicit instructions that it not be read until one year after the night of your grinding. In it, detail the way you died and the location of the hidden camera.

Sneak in at night naked and turn on the video camera. Climb into the grinder and take massive amounts of pills of your choice. Make sure it is enough to kill you.

In the morning you will be ground up and made into sausages. One year later your will, will be read to the news media and people all around the nation will vomit simultaneously.
---
The abundance of media outlets these days has afforded a nearly infinite number of ways to relay your message of doom and despair while consequently minimizing the impact. No longer can you be assured a sizable audience for the ranting and pontificating that so often accompany political/ecological/religious movements.

"Oh, whatever can I do?!" you may be wailing. "The world is coming to an end. Death and despair loom on the horizon. [Insert your hated adversary's name here] is the embodiment of evil. He/she/they/it is/are/will be the antichrist/destruction of us all/black death come to haunt us/etc."

"How can I get my cause the attention it deserves?" you ask. The answer is simple: A futile pointless violent act displayed to millions on the evening news.

Chop Your Own Head Off While Standing Next to a Major World Leader

1. Ingratiate yourself with your chosen mark. Get his/her/its confidence. Become a trusted member of the inner circle.
2. Sew a hand ax into a coat or jacket so that it is easily removable but not particularly visible.
3. Make a statement. Video tape is preferable because the TV news shows love visuals. The more visual material they have the better. The next best thing would be audio tape. It won't hold an audience as well but at least it can be played under the video of your death. Never write a letter. No one reads anymore. No one will care. Make sure your message will be easily found on your corpse.
4. On the day of a major rally, with hundreds or thousands of attendees and lots of television cameras, wear the coat with the hand ax attached.
5. Send backup copies of your message to as many news outlets as you can on the appointed day.
6. Stand in the background as you remove the ax from the coat. When you are finished move slowly toward your dignitary.
7. As the event reaches its climax, whip out the ax and lop off your own head. If possible try to run around like a chicken. Make sure to get as much blood on the famous person as possible. Aim well. That will be the image that gets the news coverage.
8. Bask in your glorious death. You've made the supreme sacrifice to save the world and have ended the torment that was your existence.
---
Sometimes you want to do something violent and bloody but you just don't have the wherewithal to assemble a cache of assault weapons. This method is simple and convenient for those on limited budgets.

1. Make a small incision in your stomach.
2. Pull out your intestines.
3. Hang yourself with the intestines.
4. A cryptic note about aliens might be a nice touch.
---
Anyone with half a brain hates the Thanksgiving to Christmas season. There is too much family. Too many happy annoying people demanding things from you. Too much forced joy specials on television. And WAY too many repetitions of songs you've been listening to since childhood.

The only way to escape this recurring nightmare is to:

1. If you have any investments, convert them to money. Take all your money and loose it playing online poker. This is especially important if you are well off. Don't tell family members and other greedy people that would profit from your demise. After you die, they will go crazy trying to find the missing money. They may even kill each other. This will bring you some satisfaction, in hell.
2. Now, stick your head in the turkey just after it comes out of the oven, preferably during the Christmas Day family gathering but a Thanksgiving Day end may also serve your purposes. Your timing really depends on your own peculiar circumstances.
3. Run around banging into family members all the while flailing your arms. You can never go wrong flailing your arms when trying to kill your self. The more flailing the better.
4. Go into a room that can be easily locked so you won't be accidently saved by well meaning but inconsiderate friends or family members.
[Alternatively you can just flee the house and run through the streets aimlessly until you pass out. NO ONE in a large city will ever go near someone with a steaming turkey on his head. If you live in a wooded or rural area the best thing to do would be to run off into the wilderness so your body can be found with all sorts of gnaw marks on it from the multitude of animals that will flock to your decaying carcass (and the turkey's too).]
5. An interesting footnote to this holiday might be to swallow a large number of Christmas ornaments (lights, small Santa dolls, actual fruit cake) before you follow your bliss. Give your family and friends (if you have either) something to discuss the following year.

If TV and teh interwebz have taught me anything it's that suicide is funny.


seriously, do you think about this alot? Maybe you need help?

I remember reading this story, it was given at a law enforcement conference.

A man jumped off the roof of his building. as he passed one window, a gunshot rang out. the slug, from a shotgun hit his head and he died before he hit the ground.

Investigators questioned the elderly couple living in that apartment and the Husband amitted to threatening his wife with the shotgun, but both thought the shotgun to be unloaded (the state it's normally kept in.) and the Wife never felt threatened because 1) The husband never loaded the shotgun 2) he always Threatens to shoot her with the empty gun.

after gathering all the information, Investigators peiced together this tragic tale.

The Jumper was their son. After loosing his job and ending up in Debt, he was desperate for cash. the Father favors the son while the mother did not. she threated to cut off his funding to force him to find a job.

The son knew the father's habit of threatening his wife with the empty shotgun, so he obtained one shotgun slug, and loaded the gun. (his prints were on the spent cartridge.) then he waited.

after months of no argument. the son, depressed that his plan didn't work, decided to end it all... so he climbed to the roof, drank a couple of beers and then jumped off the roof. Not knowing that his parents were right then and there arguing about him and his finacial status.

The husband did his usual routine of grabbing the (now loaded) shotgun and treatened the wife. When he pulled the trigger, tho. the gun went off, however, since the husband was not aiming, the slug went past the wife, through the window at the exact moment that the son's body fell past it.

after much deliberation, these facts were considered.

1) both the husband and wife (and everyone who knew them) kept the gun unloaded.
2) the only shotgun shells in the apartment were in the son' room.
3) The only prints inside the shotgun and on the shells were the son's.

so since the son loaded the gun himself, and was killed by that gun while committing suicide, it was ruled Suicide.

(as far as I know, no one disputed the ruling.)

DEATH BY SNU-SNU!

Fucking filter.

Standing under the next shuttle launch with a marshmellow on a stick. :D

I always figured if I ever got so old, and decrepited that I couldn't walk, I'd put an engine on my wheelchair, along with a few pounds of high explosives, and go over the edge of the grand canyon. Blow up 3/4 of the way down.

I'd have somebody videotape this too, sell the footage to Rotten.com,and (Assuming I have kids) use the profits for my kids inheritence. If not I want the money dumped out an airplane over some major city, who wouldn't enjoy raining money?

I always figured if I ever got so old, and decrepited that I couldn't walk, I'd put an engine on my wheelchair, along with a few pounds of high explosives, and go over the edge of the grand canyon. Blow up 3/4 of the way down.

I'd have somebody videotape this too, sell the footage to Rotten.com,and (Assuming I have kids) use the profits for my kids inheritence. If not I want the money dumped out an airplane over some major city, who wouldn't enjoy raining money?

Make the raining money happen over a Slum of Calcutta or something. That'd be cool

What do you think the most badass suicide would be?

If I off myself, I'm backflipping off of a skyscraper.

Anyone else?

I'd go to the train tracks with a stereo. I'd set it down and play 'Locomotive Breath' by Jethro Tull. Then I'd wait for the train to run me over. (Hopefully during the chorus)

But I'm not gonna off myself any time soon.

Listening to an ENTIRE Kylie Minogue album.
Only a true man would put himself through that torture.

Attempting to single-handedly invade Area 51 (yes, I know that's not its real name).

Listening to an ENTIRE Kylie Minogue album.
Only a true man would put himself through that torture.

... I did that... willingly...

DEATH BY SNU-SNU!err... Suicide is a solo action... doing it yourself... I just got an image of a person lying in bed thinking...

"Arms... so... tired... can't... finish... killing... myself..."

Fucking filter.Fucking a Filter? careful, don't strain yourself. :D

I would head-butt a sidewalk repeatedly in front of an elementary school until my skull busted open.

... I did that... willingly...

And you lived to tell the tale?!
You are truly a God among men.

And you lived to tell the tale?!
You are truly a God among men.

Or a zombie.

Suicide Bombing...may as well get my name in the newspaper and do something more than kill myself...

. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Th%C3%ADch_Qu%E1%BA%A3ng_%C4%90%E1%BB%A9c)

I remember reading this story, it was given at a law enforcement conference.

A man jumped off the roof of his building. as he passed one window, a gunshot rang out. the slug, from a shotgun hit his head and he died before he hit the ground.

Investigators questioned the elderly couple living in that apartment and the Husband amitted to threatening his wife with the shotgun, but both thought the shotgun to be unloaded (the state it's normally kept in.) and the Wife never felt threatened because 1) The husband never loaded the shotgun 2) he always Threatens to shoot her with the empty gun.

after gathering all the information, Investigators peiced together this tragic tale.

The Jumper was their son. After loosing his job and ending up in Debt, he was desperate for cash. the Father favors the son while the mother did not. she threated to cut off his funding to force him to find a job.

The son knew the father's habit of threatening his wife with the empty shotgun, so he obtained one shotgun slug, and loaded the gun. (his prints were on the spent cartridge.) then he waited.

after months of no argument. the son, depressed that his plan didn't work, decided to end it all... so he climbed to the roof, drank a couple of beers and then jumped off the roof. Not knowing that his parents were right then and there arguing about him and his finacial status.

The husband did his usual routine of grabbing the (now loaded) shotgun and treatened the wife. When he pulled the trigger, tho. the gun went off, however, since the husband was not aiming, the slug went past the wife, through the window at the exact moment that the son's body fell past it.

after much deliberation, these facts were considered.

1) both the husband and wife (and everyone who knew them) kept the gun unloaded.
2) the only shotgun shells in the apartment were in the son' room.
3) The only prints inside the shotgun and on the shells were the son's.

so since the son loaded the gun himself, and was killed by that gun while committing suicide, it was ruled Suicide.

(as far as I know, no one disputed the ruling.)

great movie (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jemzNrf2yvM) (watch it gets relevant after the first half)

Meatgrinders are for wimps...we need woodchippers...feet first...with the 'exhaust' aimed at a vegetarian eatery....

Get a job cleaning pigguts. Pigs have these huge, pink parasites worming about inside. It's one of the most disgusting things I've ever had the displeasure of seeing.

Anyway, collect a few bags of the vile things (they're just thrown out, so no one'll mind)
Order a fuckload of fireworks over the interwebs & build 5+ meduim sized pipebomb.
Ducktape plasticbags filled with the parasidic worms to yourself, on top of the pipebombs, as many as you can hide beneath your clothes.
Rig an electric fuse to a device you can keep in a pocket.
Walk into parliament & detonate yourself, spraying every one of those fucked up tux'ed parasites, with the real thing, as well as your own blood & guts.

If done correctly, you've not just snuffed yourself, you've also made the clearest, most unmistakable political statement in recorded history.

Skydive without a parachute. Over the open ocean.

Get a job cleaning pigguts. Pigs have these huge, pink parasites worming about inside. It's one of the most disgusting things I've ever had the displeasure of seeing.

Anyway, collect a few bags of the vile things (they're just thrown out, so no one'll mind)
Order a fuckload of fireworks over the interwebs & build 5+ meduim sized pipebomb.
Ducktape plasticbags filled with the parasidic worms to yourself, on top of the pipebombs, as many as you can hide beneath your clothes.
Rig an electric fuse to a device you can keep in a pocket.
Walk into parliament & detonate yourself, spraying every one of those fucked up tux'ed parasites, with the real thing, as well as your own blood & guts.

If done correctly, you've not just snuffed yourself, you've also made the clearest, most unmistakable political statement in recorded history.

and...what statement is that exactly?

and...what statement is that exactly?That they're fucking parasites..

Hmm.. PErhaps that wasn't as obvious as I thought. Or you're thick. Hmmmm...

Skydive without a parachute. Over the open ocean.

I think thats only reserved for Chileans...

That they're fucking parasites..

Hmm.. PErhaps that wasn't as obvious as I thought. Or you're thick. Hmmmm...

Ah....I thought it had someting to do with mistreatment of pigs...

Ah....I thought it had someting to do with mistreatment of pigs...*thinks* Nah.. I don't really see it working as a metaphore for that. Anyway, if the symbolic value is lost on some, I'll just have to rethink my pension plan. Fortunately I should have another 40 years or so to perfect it, hehehe.

self-disection. Take a knife and disect yourself. See what you can take out before you kick the bucket.

self-disection. Take a knife and disect yourself. See what you can take out before you kick the bucket.Depending on how intimate (haha) you are with human anatomy, that could get pretty fucking hardcore, pain-wise.

But!! New idea, same theme as that last one; nick huge amounts of hospital leftovers, preferably human blubber. Wire explosives to self in an obvious fashion & get into parliament while in session, with explosives, blubber & all.

Forcefeed politicians the shit 'til you're shot & killed. Note the bomb isn't meant to kill anyone, it's just incentive for the politicians to eat the blubber & the police/special forces to blow your brains out.

Woodchipper.

I''d jump off a plane in a crowded city, and just as I was about to hit the ground I'd turn sideways and punch some sucker in the face; the force of the blow would hopefully blow his head clean off.

Either that or extreme anal rupture.

Standing under the next shuttle launch with a marshmellow on a stick. :D

I like that one.

The point of a spectacular suicide is to grab the attention of the masses and scare them shitless.then I guess you are all fighting for second place..

http://www.preyerplanning.com/images/newyorkpics/wtcmissing/wtc05before.jpg

I remember seeing a newspaper article once about a man in Poland (I think) who in an act of drunken bravado claimed he was so hard he could cut his own head off. He then proceded to grab an axe and do just that.

There was also a man who hammered seven six-inch nails into his own skull, though remarkably he survived.