NationStates Jolt Archive

http://www.rte.ie/arts/2007/0124/cruiset.html

Apparently Cruise is now the Scientology "Christ". So does this mean we can nail him to a cross now and see if he rise three days later?

:rolleyes:

He needs slapped. And then he needs to be set down and have a long talking-to.

http://www.rte.ie/arts/2007/0124/cruiset.html

Apparently Cruise is now the Scientology "Christ". So does this mean we can nail him to a cross now and see if he rise three days later?

Different religions have different meanings.

Hell, maybe Tom Cruise is really like Christ, a figment of our imagination.

What next, Oprah as the pope of television?

What next, Oprah as the pope of television?
She isn't?

Wouldnt a better title be:
"Oh, God."
;)

what in space :rolleyes:

:rolleyes:

He needs slapped. And then he needs to be set down and have a long talking-to.

Do you have something against Scientology? It helps people by removing large amounts of money from believers' hands that would otherwise be used to purchase soul-rotting drugs. Blaspheme the Church all you want, but the thetans are still within you.

Tom Cruise will make a good Christ. He is a skilled samurai, and can defeat an entire motorcade of bad guys.

Do you have something against Scientology? It helps people by removing large amounts of money from believers' hands that would otherwise be used to purchase soul-rotting drugs. Blaspheme the Church all you want, but the thetans are still within you.

Tom Cruise will make a good Christ. He is a skilled samurai, and can defeat an entire motorcade of bad guys.

Wait...I thought Thetans were evil...

Wait...I thought Thetans were evil...

They are. You need Scientology to get them out of you.

They are. You need Scientology to get them out of you.

R2-45, much?

May I be the first to say: "Jesus Christ..."

Now that you're Christ, I've got it all ready Tom (http://www.otley.co.uk/churches/churches_together/newsletter_1999/images/chevin_cross.jpg)

Do you have something against Scientology? It helps people by removing large amounts of money from believers' hands that would otherwise be used to purchase soul-rotting drugs. Blaspheme the Church all you want, but the thetans are still within you.

Tom Cruise will make a good Christ. He is a skilled samurai, and can defeat an entire motorcade of bad guys.

You forgot to mention the evils of the horrible nazi pseudo-science known as psychiatry and its lies about the existence of chemical inbalances :rolleyes:

R2-45, much?

That's only for Fair Game.

You forgot to mention the evils of the horrible nazi pseudo-science known as psychiatry and its lies about the existence of chemical inbalances :rolleyes:

What about it? Does it have anything to do with the reality that Tom Cruise is Jesus?

http://www.rte.ie/arts/2007/0124/cruiset.html

Apparently Cruise is now the Scientology "Christ". So does this mean we can nail him to a cross now and see if he rise three days later?

KHHHHAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNN!!! NNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! (http://starwarsnoooos.ytmnd.com/) :eek:

Will the cultist fallacies ever end?!?!?!:gundge: :headbang: :mp5: :sniper:

Will this mind melting, bloodthirsty, money grabbing lie cease?!

Do you have something against Scientology? It helps people by removing large amounts of money from believers' hands

Idiot tax, then?

Idiot tax, then?

Who are you calling an idiot? The critics of Scientology are the ones pumped up on mind-warping drugs, being brainwashed with psychiatric pseduoscience. Lord Xenu would be proud, wouldn't he?

She isn't?
She is? :eek:
Do you have something against Scientology? It helps people by removing large amounts of money from believers' hands that would otherwise be used to purchase soul-rotting drugs. Blaspheme the Church all you want, but the thetans are still within you.

Tom Cruise will make a good Christ. He is a skilled samurai, and can defeat an entire motorcade of bad guys.
But aren't you Jesus?

:confused:

:p

Edit: What A Raving Packrat!

http://www.rte.ie/arts/2007/0124/cruiset.html

Apparently Cruise is now the Scientology "Christ". So does this mean we can nail him to a cross now and see if he rise three days later?

/me grabs a 60 penny nail and a sledgehammer, and proceeds to hammer the nail into Tom Cruise's forhead.




OOPS, forgot the cross! :D

C'mon guys! You really aren't going to support this (http://ytmnd.com/list/?search=unfunny+scientology&action=login&x=0&y=0) are you? Refusing psychology is like refusing medicine to someone who need it. Killing people whether they'll waste the money or not?! Stealing from the US government?! Gorey murder? Whether I object to Scientology or not the fact remains that we humans have free will and can choose and shouldn't be pushed around by groups saying "join us or an evil entity will eat you" forcing religion is wrong, people should be able to choose freely without being scared into a belief.

You might say that, but it would be because of the thetans. You have to get rid of those bad thetans, and the only way to do that is to join Scientology. Tom Cruise and John Travolta did it, and they're enormously successful Hollywood actors in amazing movies like Swordfish and Battlefield Earth. The money you own is destroying your soul, and the best way to get rid of it is to pay it to the Church, go and see Tom Cruise's movies, or to buy a copy of Dianetics at your local bookstore.

They are. You need Scientology to get them out of you.

C'mon guys! You really aren't going to support this (http://theunfunnytruth.ytmnd.com/) are you? Refusing psychology is like refusing medicine to someone who need it. Killing people whether they'll waste the money or not?! Stealing from the US government?! Gorey murder? Whether I object to Scientology or not the fact remains that we humans have free will and can choose and shouldn't be pushed around by groups saying "join us or an evil entity will eat you" forcing religion is wrong, people should be able to choose freely without being scared into a belief.

Hell, maybe Tom Cruise is really like Christ, a figment of our imagination.Would that mean that the time I saw Days of Thunder was just a bad dream? That would be nice.

Would that mean that the time I saw Days of Thunder was just a bad dream? That would be nice.

Exactly!

Would that mean that the time I saw Days of Thunder was just a bad dream? That would be nice.

Those are the thetans talking, again. Tom Cruise was the star, wasn't he? So it had to be a good movie.

Those are the thetans talking, again. Tom Cruise was the star, wasn't he? So it had to be a good movie.

I always thought the Thetans were that frat down the street.

Oh, you have no idea how proud I...er...Lord Xenu am...er...is.
Would you like a shrine dedicated to you, my lord? :p

She is? :eek:

But aren't you Jesus?

:confused:

:p

Edit: What A Raving Packrat!

Maybe ... :eek:

<.<
>.>

Who are you calling an idiot? The critics of Scientology are the ones pumped up on mind-warping drugs, being brainwashed with psychiatric pseduoscience. Lord Xenu would be proud, wouldn't he?

Oh, you have no idea how proud I...er...Lord Xenu am...er...is.

My ability to freely say no is evidence that I still have a soul, and I barely have money so I have nothing to give. And though I did get greedy at times I learned of my ways and will donate the money to medical research. They at can learn to cure almost anything once funded properly.

That's a lie, the so-called "medical" drugs never helped anyone, and are a perversion of medicine. The TRUE cure for your troubles is a $2000 counseling session in which the reasons for your unhappiness are addressed and dealt with. Don't let the thetans control you.

You might say that, but it would be because of the thetans. You have to get rid of those bad thetans, and the only way to do that is to join Scientology. Tom Cruise and John Travolta did it, and they're enormously successful Hollywood actors in amazing movies like Swordfish and Battlefield Earth. The money you own is destroying your soul, and the best way to get rid of it is to pay it to the Church, go and see Tom Cruise's movies, or to buy a copy of Dianetics at your local bookstore.

My ability to freely say no is evidence that I still have a soul, and I barely have money so I have nothing to give. And though I did get greedy at times I learned of my ways and will donate the money to medical research. They at can learn to cure almost anything once funded properly.

Oh, you have no idea how proud I...er...Lord Xenu am...er...is.

huh? :confused: This seconds my theory that drugs are evil when used to get high in that they cause human suffering.

Maybe ... :eek:

<.<
>.>
Wait...Jesus = Tom Cruise, and Jesus = Ginny...


Therefore, logic tells me Ginny = Tom Cruise.

I want my money back for the Minority Report! :mad:

I always thought the Thetans were that frat down the street.

Perhaps you're thinking of the Epsilon Kappa Iota Lambdas, or EVIL, which is what thetans are? If they are confusing you to this degree, may I suggest that you get to the nearest church and have yourself audited, before they make you do something reprehensible, like consume Tylenol.

Medicine has helped me much thank you or why else do people die when they don't take the meds they need?

Because they haven't used their E-meters often enough?

Wait...Jesus = Tom Cruise, and Jesus = Ginny...


Therefore, logic tells me Ginny = Tom Cruise.

I want my money back for the Minority Report! :mad:

Be reasonable. War of the Worlds, I might grant you. Minority Report kicked ass.

That's a lie, the so-called "medical" drugs never helped anyone, and are a perversion of medicine. The TRUE cure for your troubles is a $2000 counseling session in which the reasons for your unhappiness are addressed and dealt with. Don't let the thetans control you.

Medicine has helped me much thank you or why else do people die when they don't take the meds they need?

Because they haven't used their E-meters often enough?

the whats?

the whats?

This shows that you need to be educated in the Church. If you don't know the basic terminology, how can you hope to exorcise your thetans? ... How is your bank account?

Mr. Cruise, come out of the closet

This shows that you need to be educated in the Church. If you don't know the basic terminology, how can you hope to exorcise your thetans? ... How is your bank account?

Sorry I recognize these "counseling meetings" and "educational films" propaganda and subliminal messaging meant to strip me of my natural rights and reduce me to a golem that obeys his mater's bidding, sadly enough I know other poeple of other religions who talk like you let they oppose your beliefs, Baptists in use these techniques too. And I don't have a bank account and as I said before I barely have money. And assuming you live in America you are infringing on the natural rights of people by trying to indoctrinate them against their will and by using intimidation tactics. And lets remember the US Constitution is based on the teachings of John Locke and his views on the rights a human has from birth.

blah blah blah I don't have a bank account and as I said before I barely have money

Okay, never mind, it turns out we don't need you anyway.

http://www.rte.ie/arts/2007/0124/cruiset.html

Apparently Cruise is now the Scientology "Christ". So does this mean we can nail him to a cross now and see if he rise three days later?

...apparently Scientology has decided that it no longer wishes to be taken seriously.

Why declare an actor who can't find work (because he's too fucking crazy) to be your "Christ" figure?

There are many ways for a religion to spread it's message to others and increase the size of it's congregation...

This is NOT one of them! :p

Okay, never mind, it turns out we don't need you anyway.

Whether I had one or not why would it matter? I got screwed over by different cult previously and now I'm a neurotic paranoid loser.

This shows that you need to be educated in the Church. If you don't know the basic terminology, how can you hope to exorcise your thetans? ... How is your bank account?

Give me you home address.

Mr. Cruise, come out of the closet

No! I'm never coming out!

...apparently Scientology has decided that it no longer wishes to be taken seriously.

Why declare an actor who can't find work (because he's too fucking crazy) to be your "Christ" figure?

There are many ways for a religion to spread it's message to others and increase the size of it's congregation...

This is NOT one of them! :p

That's what they said about Jesus, too, but look what happened. Just be grateful that Jesus has been reincarnated as Tom Cruise, during your lifetime! I sure am.

:eek:

Oh great L. Ron, deliver me from the internet stalking drug-dealing evil-doers!

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12250318&postcount=61

See, I'm not evil. :)

Whether I had one or not why would it matter? I got screwed over by different cult previously and now I'm a neurotic paranoid loser.

Pssst. I'm not really a Scientologist.

Give me you home address.

:eek:

Oh great L. Ron, deliver me from the internet stalking drug-dealing evil-doers!

Oh, thank Hubbard. :)

:fluffle:

Tom Cruise is really the devil, his people that chase him round are obviously going to hell and are like Ruffy, except not shit.:)

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12250318&postcount=61

See, I'm not evil. :)

Oh, thank Hubbard. :)

i like to beat him up and get my money back

Cmon guys, scientology can't be all bad.

After all, Ling-Ling is a member. :D

Cmon guys, scientology can't be all bad.

After all, Ling-Ling is a member. :D

Who?

Who?


Ling-Ling, a psycopathic pickachu parody from Drawn Together.

Maybe we can make a musical of his life. We can call it Thomas Cruise, Superstar.

Jeez. If I were forced to choose between Christ and Cruise, I'd take Christ any day.

http://www.rte.ie/arts/2007/0124/cruiset.html

Apparently Cruise is now the Scientology "Christ". So does this mean we can nail him to a cross now and see if he rise three days later?

This is just wrong on so many levels.

This is just wrong on so many levels.

Yes it is.

http://www.rte.ie/arts/2007/0124/cruiset.html

Apparently Cruise is now the Scientology "Christ". So does this mean we can nail him to a cross now and see if he rise three days later?

As good an excuse to nail him up as any. :)

No! I'm never coming out!

You mean "I'm not in the closet" ;)

Eh I could think of other reasons, but at least now we can't say that we're just being skeptical.

Hey Tom!
Tom: Hey guys, umm what are you doing with that cross, hammer, and nails?
Well Tom, you are the "Christ" of Scientology and as we all know, the last Christ was nailed, died, and three days later rose from the dead. Now it's your turn!
Tom: I don't want to be the Christ of Scientology anymore. :(
Too bad Tom. Someone tie him to a pole and we can beat the living crap out of him for awhile.

:D

As good an excuse to nail him up as any. :)

Eh I could think of other reasons, but at least now we can't say that we're just being skeptical.

Hey Tom!
Tom: Hey guys, umm what are you doing with that cross, hammer, and nails?
Well Tom, you are the "Christ" of Scientology and as we all know, the last Christ was nailed, died, and three days later rose from the dead. Now it's your turn!
Tom: I don't want to be the Christ of Scientology anymore. :(
Too bad Tom. Someone tie him to a pole and we can beat the living crap out of him for awhile.

Well Tom, you are the "Christ" of Scientology and as we all know, the last Christ was nailed, died, and three days later rose from the dead. Now it's your turn!

Pity that technically is not correct. There were thousands of people with the title Christ after all...
But lets not tell Tom that.

:D

Am I cynical, yes
Am I distrusting of pretty much everyone except those closes to me: Yes
Can I be sadistic: I believe I've just proven that.
Am I somehow a cute lovable fuzz ball that despite your best effort, you just can't help but laugh along with his sick and sadistic jokes? Hell yes!
:D

Pity that technically is not correct. There were thousands of people with the title Christ after all...
But lets not tell Tom that.

*hits you on the head with the hammer and knocks you out*

Don't pay any attention to him Tom, he's just having a bad drug trip. Now quit your bitching and take these cat-o-nine whipping like a man!

I believe in the existence of Tom Cruise.

I’m not too sure about JC though.

/me grabs a 60 penny nail and a sledgehammer, and proceeds to hammer the nail into Tom Cruise's forhead.

OOPS, forgot the cross! :D

I never got that. Does the size of a nail measured in 'pennies' decrease progressively with inflation? Or is it just cheaper to make nails out of legal tender than stock metal now?

Why don't I just look it up?
Great idea. Why didn't I think of that?
This classification system was still used in England in the 18th century, but is obsolete there. :p

Right, finished not making sense.

Do you have something against Scientology? It helps people by removing large amounts of money from believers' hands that would otherwise be used to purchase soul-rotting drugs. Blaspheme the Church all you want, but the thetans are still within you.

Tom Cruise will make a good Christ. He is a skilled samurai, and can defeat an entire motorcade of bad guys.

:eek:

Repent!

*Throws Bible* :p

I disagree with Scientology, but my problem is more with Tom Cruise. Everything he does is all one big publicity stunt. I wouldn't be surprised if his conversion to a typically looked-down-upon religion is just another part of that.

http://www.rte.ie/arts/2007/0124/cruiset.html

Apparently Cruise is now the Scientology "Christ". So does this mean we can nail him to a cross now and see if he rise three days later?

Shouldn't the thread title be "oh L.Ron..." ?

Shouldn't the thread title be "oh L.ron..." ?

Very good point.

Isn't this a total ripoff of a South Park episode or something?

I believe in the existence of Tom Cruise.

Oh come on... has anyone actually seen Tom Cruise? I mean, really? Tom Cruise is blatantly a metaphor for the Roman god Moronus Maximus. Wake up people! :eek:

the link does not work for me :(