NationStates Jolt Archive

MOGADISHU - Somalia has been ruled by the Arabs, the French, the British and the Italians, but now power is in the hands of Canadians.

The interim government that took over this devastated East African country following a war that erupted in late December is made up of a remarkable number of former Ottawa and Toronto residents.

"Tim Hortons coffee, I like it," said Abdullahi Ahmed Afrah, the Minister of Trade, a Somali-Canadian economist who returned to Mogadishu to help turn around his disastrous homeland.

The Minister is one of 18 Somali Members of Parliament who are also Canadian citizens. Four members of the Cabinet are Canadians: the ministers of education, information, wildlife and trade.

The deputy ministers of agriculture and energy are also Canadians. President Abdullahi Yusuf Ahmed is not a Canadian citizen, but his wife and children are, and so is the powerful President of Puntl and state, General Ade Muse Hirsi.


Full article here (http://www.garoweonline.com/stories/publish/article_7172.shtml).

I think this qualifies as... odd. ;)

Full article here (http://www.garoweonline.com/stories/publish/article_7172.shtml).

I think this qualifies as... odd. ;)
This is Canada's secret plan to slowly take over the world. :p

Canadians do what?

I for one welcome our new Canadian overlords.......eh?

wow, I can't wait for the first wave of Somali-born players to hit the NHL..... Exciting times ahead.......

Why do you think we opened a Tim Hortens in Kabul? To boost troop morale? That's the cover story...

Canadians do what?
* this one needs to be purged from the system :p

Why do you think we opened a Tim Hortens in Kabul? To boost troop morale? That's the cover story...
My youngest son is earning his Timmy's ambassadorship wings here in Durham region. :D

Looks like Canada is ofering scholarships to african students, and these, after graduated, are going back to their countries to try to help.

you know the old saying, "Canadians are eh'holes"....

Very interesting. Very interesting indeed.

All Hail The New Canadian Empire, eh! (http://www.laurelcanyonthebook.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/08/Canadian%20flag.gif)

Why do you think we opened a Tim Hortens in Kabul? To boost troop morale? That's the cover story...

Kabul is in Somalia?

I invoke Michigan's honorary Canadian province status, eh?

They're only annexing Somalia so they can all go on holiday and drink Molson where it's not too freezing cold, eh?

eh?

eh?

Just smile and nod.

Full article here (http://www.garoweonline.com/stories/publish/article_7172.shtml).

I think this qualifies as... odd. ;)

They're just fleeing from the bloodthirsty Wampas that roam the great white north, eating everything that moves! But now they'll have to deal with Chimeras, which are more lethal, but more rare than the North American Wampa or Nerdus Sumpremus.

*hides*

Full article here (http://www.garoweonline.com/stories/publish/article_7172.shtml).

I think this qualifies as... odd. ;)

Weird. As long as they dont say 'eh?' and 'aboot' (Yeah, I know, it's pronounced 'aboat'), Somalia will be fine.

What's all this aboot, eh? There's no conspiracy here. Move along now.

As the Canadian comedian Jeremy Hotz once said, "Canada should just attack another country, no one would see that coming. Greatest coup in military history! Lay low for 275 years, then attack Turkey. Just show up, 'Fuck you we're taking it!" And we're calling it CHICKEN you assholes!"

Turkey? Screw it! Let's just take France; they'll surrender, we take it, and send over the separatists. Thus solving two problems at once.

But we'd still have those damn Albertans....

As the Canadian comedian Jeremy Hotz once said, "Canada should just attack another country, no one would see that coming. Greatest coup in military history! Lay low for 275 years, then attack Turkey. Just show up, 'Fuck you we're taking it!" And we're calling it CHICKEN you assholes!"
Turkey? Screw it! Let's just take France; they'll surrender, we take it, and send over the separatists. Thus solving two problems at once.

This is Canada's secret plan to slowly take over the world. :p

Central, this is Special Agent Dobbs. Suggest immediate recall of Operative code-named "CanuckHeaven" - he's spilling the beans...

But we'd still have those damn Albertans....

Yeah, but those are the family rejects who everyone still loves anyway because they liven up those dull family reunions, whereas the Quebecers just rain on the parade at every chance. :p

Why do you think we opened a Tim Hortens in Kabul? To boost troop morale? That's the cover story...

Shhhh! Don't let them know that the Timmy H is addictive!

Shhhh! Don't let them know that the Timmy H is addictive!

It's fair compensation for all the yummy Afghan hash we've been getting...

It's fair compensation for all the yummy Afghan hash we've been getting...

Hahahahha, true...I loved the recent kerfuffle about the rampant drug abuse amongst Canadian soldiers stationed in Afghanistan, and the resultant collective shrug it elicited in the military brass, "eh, it's not like we can replace the ones we'd have to run out if we made a big deal..."

Hahahahha, true...I loved the recent kerfuffle about the rampant drug abuse amongst Canadian soldiers stationed in Afghanistan, and the resultant collective shrug it elicited in the military brass, "eh, it's not like we can replace the ones we'd have to run out if we made a big deal..."

The brass should consider itself lucky they have anybody to command at all. Free access to top-quality yet inexpensive black Afghani hashish should be used openly by the CAF as an inducement to recruit...

The brass should consider itself lucky they have anybody to command at all. Free access to top-quality yet inexpensive black Afghani hashish should be used openly by the CAF as an inducement to recruit...

And a thorougly Canadian way to go about things, really. We don't appeal to nationalism, we appeal to the Canadian love of all things pot related. *does some blades*

*head explodes from overload of Canadian jokes*

*head explodes from overload of Canadian jokes*

Oops.

And a thorougly Canadian way to go about things, really. We don't appeal to nationalism, we appeal to the Canadian love of all things pot related. *does some blades*

For all non-Canadians, Neesika is referring to a process called hot-knifing, which involves squeezing a small portion of cannabis product between two red hot knives. The resulting smoke is then sucked into the lungs. The trick is to keep yourself from touching the red hot knives with your lips.

Why do canadians do this, you ask? Because it is the most cost-effective manner to get high when there is a limited quantity of drugs, a common situation in rural canada during the winter.

The OP is also an excellent example of another benefit of immigration: the return of educated immigrants who can then use their education to help their original community.

all your eh jokes are not funny.

For all non-Canadians, Neesika is referring to a process called hot-knifing, which involves squeezing a small portion of cannabis product between two red hot knives. The resulting smoke is then sucked into the lungs. The trick is to keep yourself from touching the red hot knives with your lips.

Why do canadians do this, you ask? Because it is the most cost-effective manner to get high when there is a limited quantity of drugs, a common situation in rural canada during the winter.

The OP is also an excellent example of another benefit of immigration: the return of educated immigrants who can then use their education to help their original community.
Why don't you just by more pot?

This looks like a great way to get away from the cold in the winter, and all of those meddlesome Americans!

Why do canadians do this, you ask? Because it is the most cost-effective manner to get high when there is a limited quantity of drugs, a common situation in rural canada during the winter.

The OP is also an excellent example of another benefit of immigration: the return of educated immigrants who can then use their education to help their original community.

Were those two sentences intentionally put together? ;)

http://img187.imageshack.us/img187/1294/somcan8xz.png
The Canuck Republic of Somalia

Why don't you just by more pot?

It's often a question of supply, if not a question of finances. As Gift-of-God mentioned...in rural areas, supply can sometimes be iffy. It usually works out that you have a tonne of product all at once, and then nothing for a great long time. As a result, hot-knifing has developed into a high art, and much as one who was raised on gruel as a child because of financial straits, yet grows up fond of the stuff nonetheless, hot-knifing simply remains for me one of my favourite methods of smoking hash.

Hahahaha...but you should see what happened one day when we experimented with metal burger flippers having no knives about...the burn marks didn't fade for a good three weeks...

Were those two sentences intentionally put together? ;)

http://img187.imageshack.us/img187/1294/somcan8xz.png
The Canuck Republic of Somalia

Hehehe, our next conquest is Japan for all its cultural effed-upness. It shall be a glorious addition!:D

This is Canada's secret plan to slowly take over the world. :p
Yes, start where nobody expects.

For all non-Canadians, Neesika is referring to a process called hot-knifing, which involves squeezing a small portion of cannabis product between two red hot knives. The resulting smoke is then sucked into the lungs. The trick is to keep yourself from touching the red hot knives with your lips.
Did Canadians invent that? Also, you should not put the knives near your lips. You must cut off the bottom of a large plastic drink bottle. Have your friend hold the hot knives with the hash between them at the cut end, so the smoke floats into the bottle. You put your mouth to the neck and inhale! Works great and gets ya really high, eh?

I myself have quit buying weed and will grow it myself. I am concerned about the fact that buying illegal drugs is funding violence and guns both here in Ireland and in the source countries.

Did Canadians invent that? Also, you should not put the knives near your lips. You must cut off the bottom of a large plastic drink bottle. Have your friend hold the hot knives with the hash between them at the cut end, so the smoke floats into the bottle. You put your mouth to the neck and inhale! Works great and gets ya really high, eh? Agreed, this is the best method of all, but not always possible. You can also invert the cut off bottom, poking a few holes in it, and use it to hold some icecubes in place. This helps stop waste due to hackage.

And no, I doubt we invented it.

Agreed, this is the best method of all, but not always possible. You can also invert the cut off bottom, poking a few holes in it, and use it to hold some icecubes in place. This helps stop waste due to hackage.

And no, I doubt we invented it.

An easier cooling tool is very simple to make:

Take a used toilet-paper roll, then pierce the roll through sides (close to one end or the other) with toothpicks to form a rough "X" inside the roll. Then fill the roll with large ice-cubes, and voila. Ice-cold smoking pleasure, with no burned lips to be seen.

Knifing works best with an acetylene torch, IMO.

Anyone ever do bottle-tokes, or "BTs", as we used to call 'em?

car cigarette lighter always worked for me...nasty burns are inevitable once you lose mental concentration

car cigarette lighter always worked for me...nasty burns are inevitable once you lose mental concentration

Losing mental concentration happens to uh - other kids, or something. No toke-a-dots on my silks, thanks all the same.

I never ceased to find it hilarious every time I'd hear that sssst sound as someone yet again branded their lips:D

So...Eh? is the only funny stereotype people can think of Canada, eh?

So...Eh? is the only funny stereotype people can think of Canada, eh?

And aboot.

I knew it! Canada is building the greatest empire the world's ever seen. Roflcopter@ The british and french and spanish empires of the 16th, 17th, 18th, 19 and 20th centuries. The Canadian Empire will rule the world. And OMFG we should have tested our nukes on canada and not our own desert in 1945. If we took em out then we wouldn't have this country that is starting wars for no reason just to make outposts of tyranny. After Iraw, screw Iran, Syria or North Korea, we gotta take down Canada...

So...Eh? is the only funny stereotype people can think of Canada, eh?
I think I was 30 before I ever heard anyone say "eh", it's an eastern canadian thing...


And aboot.

and I've never heard anyone say "aboot"...

I knew it! Canada is building the greatest empire the world's ever seen. Roflcopter@ The british and french and spanish empires of the 16th, 17th, 18th, 19 and 20th centuries. The Canadian Empire will rule the world. And OMFG we should have tested our nukes on canada and not our own desert in 1945. If we took em out then we wouldn't have this country that is starting wars for no reason just to make outposts of tyranny. After Iraw, screw Iran, Syria or North Korea, we gotta take down Canada...

forget Canada, it's the dutch you gotta worry about they're undercover imperialists...they own everything...

An easier cooling tool is very simple to make:

Take a used toilet-paper roll, then pierce the roll through sides (close to one end or the other) with toothpicks to form a rough "X" inside the roll. Then fill the roll with large ice-cubes, and voila. Ice-cold smoking pleasure, with no burned lips to be seen.

Knifing works best with an acetylene torch, IMO.

Anyone ever do bottle-tokes, or "BTs", as we used to call 'em?
Hmmm, not sure, used bottles as pipes though in theatres, so the smoke wouldn't escape... Ha, we also improvised with an apple, (used as a pipe often) as a cooler, it was rather convoluted and difficult to aim properly. The only time we used an acetylene torch was in the garage of a friend whose father was RCMP...that used to give us the greatest kick. Rest of the time it was electric stoves, used to hate waiting for the knives to heat up. What are kids going to do these days when electric stoves are more and more that ceramic top? Buy hotplates in Chinatown I say.

They used their warship (http://www.satirewire.com/news/feb02/warship.shtml) :eek:

I never ceased to find it hilarious every time I'd hear that sssst sound as someone yet again branded their lips:D

It never actually happened very often...only once that I witnessed. Why is my damn mouth watering?

I think I was 30 before I ever heard anyone say "eh", it's an eastern canadian thing... Oh come on now, you aren't listening then. I'll admit freely I say it constantly in speech. It's a fantastic way to end a question, a rhetorical statement, or...really any other sentence. Once someone brings it to your attention, it's really quite embarrasing how often if falls from the lips of pretty much any Canadian I've ever met...though the Newfies are the worst for it:)

Everybody says 'eh?' even if only once every so often. But this 'aboot' thing is just silly. I haven't even heard a Newfie pronounce 'about' as 'aboot', other than on South Park.

What do I notice is how we'll say we're 'sorry' (sore-ee)for something, while Americans'll say they're 'sari' (sahr-ee).

I invoke Michigan's honorary Canadian province status, eh?

No we shall be a Sovereign nation of our own before that happens.

Oh come on now, you aren't listening then. I'll admit freely I say it constantly in speech. It's a fantastic way to end a question, a rhetorical statement, or...really any other sentence. Once someone brings it to your attention, it's really quite embarrasing how often if falls from the lips of pretty much any Canadian I've ever met...though the Newfies are the worst for it:)
very eastern, it spread to the west by migration, I know very few native westerners who use it...when I was young I was quite puzzled when I heard this supposedly Canadian term was used by all Canadians(Ontario doesn't represent all Canada), I just never heard it where I lived... and I am listening, only one person in my family uses it...

http://www.pumpkinsoft.de/covershots/3906.jpg
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO:eek: (http://lukevaderreversal.ytmnd.com/)

I knew Canada would soon begin to take over the world!!!!! :O :D

Very good movie :D

It's time we took a stand against Canadian imperialism ...

Full article here (http://www.garoweonline.com/stories/publish/article_7172.shtml).

I think this qualifies as... odd. ;)

http://www.pumpkinsoft.de/covershots/3906.jpg
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO:eek: (http://lukevaderreversal.ytmnd.com/)

I knew Canada would soon begin to take over the world!!!!! :eek: :D

very eastern, it spread to the west by migration, I know very few native westerners who use it...when I was young I was quite puzzled when I heard this supposedly Canadian term was used by all Canadians(Ontario doesn't represent all Canada), I just never heard it where I lived... and I am listening, only one person in my family uses it...

Blame the Newfies then...they're the ones spreading westward...

Then again, it's also a very Indian thing to say :P

Blame the Newfies then...they're the ones spreading westward...

Then again, it's also a very Indian thing to say :P

even the newfies have different speach patterns, St Johns vs Bay Boys...almost need a translator for Bay Boys english...

Indians,(natives I assume), ya I hear it a lot from them...

Does this mean the Barenaked Ladies will be touring in Somalia?

I only know 2 people that use eh other then when they are joking, one is Calgarian(crazy Albertans) and one is an ex-Newfie.

and one is an ex-Newfie.

There's no such thing. I'm ashamed you'd even suggest it.

Does this mean the Barenaked Ladies will be touring in Somalia?

More importantly, can we send Nickelback there, and then not let them return?

I only know 2 people that use eh other then when they are joking, one is Calgarian(crazy Albertans) and one is an ex-Newfie.

I use it occasionally, and I often hear other people use it too. (I'm from Saskatchewan)

More importantly, can we send Nickelback there, and then not let them return?

A fine question indeed!

"NOBODY EXPECTS THE CANADIAN GOVERMENT!"

now deploy the beaver death squaron.

Yes indeed. We have some fine beaver here, just ready to attack.

"NOBODY EXPECTS THE CANADIAN GOVERMENT!"

now deploy the beaver death squaron.

So, Somalia is now under the Pax Canada? Wow, didn't see that one coming.

LOL

Actually, I think Canada is bigger than the Roman Empire...

It's just a jump to the left...

All Hail The New Canadian Empire, eh! (http://www.laurelcanyonthebook.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/08/Canadian%20flag.gif)

LOL

It's just a jump to the left...

And then a step to the right...

And then a step to the right...

LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!!!!!!!!


everybody now.

http://www.pumpkinsoft.de/covershots/3906.jpg
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO:eek: (http://lukevaderreversal.ytmnd.com/)

I knew Canada would soon begin to take over the world!!!!! :eek: :D

Lol, that movie is a classic.

It's often a question of supply, if not a question of finances. As Gift-of-God mentioned...in rural areas, supply can sometimes be iffy. It usually works out that you have a tonne of product all at once, and then nothing for a great long time. As a result, hot-knifing has developed into a high art, and much as one who was raised on gruel as a child because of financial straits, yet grows up fond of the stuff nonetheless, hot-knifing simply remains for me one of my favourite methods of smoking hash.

Hahahaha...but you should see what happened one day when we experimented with metal burger flippers having no knives about...the burn marks didn't fade for a good three weeks...
:eek:
No supply! That is cruel and unusual. You should have the government step in and assure that there is always adequate supply.

So, Somalia is now under the Pax Canada? Wow, didn't see that one coming.
From the sounds of the article, its just a few Canadians, not the Canadian government.

Hail Canada! They Shall Rule The World!

Hail Canada! They Shall Rule The World!

Well, you just won't notice it too much when we do...

An easier cooling tool is very simple to make:

Take a used toilet-paper roll, then pierce the roll through sides (close to one end or the other) with toothpicks to form a rough "X" inside the roll. Then fill the roll with large ice-cubes, and voila. Ice-cold smoking pleasure, with no burned lips to be seen.

Knifing works best with an acetylene torch, IMO.

Anyone ever do bottle-tokes, or "BTs", as we used to call 'em?

The most Canadian method of all goes like this:

1. Get a beer bottle. Canadians may merely finish the one they are currently drinking, while you foreigners may have to open one, or even possibly buy one...

2. Get a pair of toenail or fingernail clippers. Set them up like you would if you were cutting your nails.

3. Squeeze the clippers thin enough that they will pass through the neck of the bottle. Plop them in.

4. Place your thumb over the bottle neck and shake. The toenail clipper should pop out the bottom of the beer bottle, leaving the rest intact.

5. While your knives are heating up on the element or propane torch, place the bottle in the snow. Non-Canadians may have to use a freezer or other technological contrivance.

6. (crucial step removed to protect innocent minds)

7. Enjoy the frosty smoke of the roach.