NationStates Jolt Archive

Ok so most of yall know from my Soul Searching thread (which I have linked) that I have some issues to work out.

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=514153

So I thought I would try therapy (again). I've already tried it twice but I dunno if I actually got anywhere with it. Both time it was just some guy nodding and saying "How does that make you feel." and "Tell me more." God if I wanted useless babbling and nodding, I would buy a talking bobble head doll. I would like a therapist that can offer real answers and real advice. However, I do have a fear that he would want to do some test and those test would find that I have a chemical imbalance, like bi-polar, etc. I do not want to take any such test because, well, there are certain things that can ban a person from flying, and being diagnosed with certain mental condition can do that. I do not want to give up the one thing that may be keeping me sane.

So, have anyone here ever taken therapy and how did it work out for you guys?

You should seriously use a talking bobble head doll.

In essence; no.

I need, it, but can't quite face actually booking it. Any advice would be geuinely warmly recieved....

nope, never gotten therapy. tried getting just a counsellor but in this area the NHS sucks for mental health stuff, and i can't be bothered to go private. i'd like to but i don't really need it - i'm starting to figure stuff out on my own, particularly with the help of meds from my doctor, allowing me to objectively think about stuff.

Ok so most of yall know from my Soul Searching thread (which I have linked) that I have some issues to work out.

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=514153

So I thought I would try therapy (again). I've already tried it twice but I dunno if I actually got anywhere with it. Both time it was just some guy nodding and saying "How does that make you feel." and "Tell me more." God if I wanted useless babbling and nodding, I would buy a talking bobble head doll. I would like a therapist that can offer real answers and real advice. However, I do have a fear that he would want to do some test and those test would find that I have a chemical imbalance, like bi-polar, etc. I do not want to take any such test because, well, there are certain things that can ban a person from flying, and being diagnosed with certain mental condition can do that. I do not want to give up the one thing that may be keeping me sane.

So, have anyone here ever taken therapy and how did it work out for you guys?

I actually just got back from seeing a shrink. If you think you really need it, then book an apointment and see how it goes. You might like it and want to go back, if not then you could just forget about the whole experience.

Ok so most of yall know from my Soul Searching thread (which I have linked) that I have some issues to work out.

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=514153

So I thought I would try therapy (again). I've already tried it twice but I dunno if I actually got anywhere with it. Both time it was just some guy nodding and saying "How does that make you feel." and "Tell me more." God if I wanted useless babbling and nodding, I would buy a talking bobble head doll. I would like a therapist that can offer real answers and real advice. However, I do have a fear that he would want to do some test and those test would find that I have a chemical imbalance, like bi-polar, etc. I do not want to take any such test because, well, there are certain things that can ban a person from flying, and being diagnosed with certain mental condition can do that. I do not want to give up the one thing that may be keeping me sane.

So, have anyone here ever taken therapy and how did it work out for you guys?

I hadn't heard that you have to present your medical history before purchasing an airline ticket but it has been two years, almost, since I flew in the US, so I suppose it's possible. Anyway, I wouldn't worry about that.

Choosing the right therapist is not easy. If you don't want to take tests, you don't have to. Remeber whose name is on the check that will be going to the therapist after every session. This may mean moving from one to another or another still before you find someone you're comfortable with. You need patience. And you may still gain some understanding from sessions with therapists you don't choose to continue with.

I actually just got back from seeing a shrink. If you think you really need it, then book an apointment and see how it goes. You might like it and want to go back, if not then you could just forget about the whole experience.

Good advice, just don't expect instant results. I suspect a great many people go into a therapist's office thinking, "Hey, one, two sessions and I'll be good to go." It takes time.

I hadn't heard that you have to present your medical history before purchasing an airline ticket but it has been two years, almost, since I flew in the US, so I suppose it's possible. Anyway, I wouldn't worry about that.


Umm, I actually fly the airplanes.

Umm, I actually fly the airplanes.

Wilgrove, just because you have a boxcutter with you doesn't mean you get to fly the airplane. Well, actually it does, but still.

:D

i think it is different for different people. for me, at the time, it didn't work. but i am considering trying again. i have some friends who had to try several different people until they got someone they truly connected with and made progress. it's all a matter of finding the right person, in my eyes. so, give it a try. you may like it, you may not. but at least you're acknowledging you have a problem and are willing to try to resolve it. and about the flying issue, i can understand why you are scared. but in all honesty, would you rather live your life miserable, but be able to fly, or be content, which can lead to discovering other things you enjoy, but not be able to fly? also, if it is a serious problem, it can interfere with and very well may ruin your career, and i don't think you'd wanna take that chance. i understand that flying is one thing that makes you happy, but i promise you it isn't the only thing. best of luck to you. :)

a therapist will only give you back what you put in. If you aren't "feeling it" wioth the one you have, discuss it with him. Use his reply to gauge what you think about him--and make a decision to stay or find another one based upon this. I have seen four so far, the first three were useless, the fourth actually helped me a lot.

-

One more thing about seeing a shrink... It's nice to have someone to talk honestly to without fear of them thinking less of you. Everything is confidential unless its child abuse, suicidal thoughts, or thoughts of harming another person. Other than that you don't have to worry about anything. I talk to mine about stuff I would never bring up with my friends or family.

Umm, I actually fly the airplanes.

Oh. Yes, well ... It really depends on whether your troubles consist of seeing things that aren't there or relating to other people. If it's the former, you might have a problem.

Wait, isnt this the chronic masturabters discussion group?

Wait, isnt this the chronic masturabters discussion group?

No.

I've been to therapy twice. The first time was really successful and helped me get over my problem of getting nauseous whenever I was around people, and the second time is still in progress.

Wait, isnt this the chronic masturabters discussion group?

No that's down the hall in the semen and gooey covered room.

No that's down the hall in the semen and gooey covered room.

THEY BROUGHT FREE SNACKS! HOORAY!

*Runs down hall*

there are different types of therapists, most of the ones you will find will ask you "and how do you feel about that?" but they should get to the point when you say "I feel pissed off" that they ask "why?" which is the whole point of going to therapy, to find out why you feel like crap so you can fix it.

Yes I have, and yes it works if you honestly give it a go ... but you have to take that step

I've never been to therapy, but I have a feeling I may need it soon. I'm falling apart at the seams.

I imagine I'll start it, just because it can be immensely beneficial to talk about things even if you don't have any particular problems. It might even find some things that you didn't even know about.

I've never been to therapy, but I have a feeling I may need it soon. I'm falling apart at the seams.

Maybe you just need to go clothes shopping. ;)

Maybe you just need to go clothes shopping. ;)

Bum bum tsch.

I've never been to therapy, but I have a feeling I may need it soon. I'm falling apart at the seams.

I can beat you in that department.

I've contrived to fuck up my entire life in the space of one and a half school years. I've lost two relatives in 8 months. I'm actually living to pass the time until university......:(

Maybe you just need to go clothes shopping. ;)

Shopping=teh lose. I hate shopping, it would make things worse :p

Shopping=teh lose. I hate shopping, it would make things worse :p

It was the best I could do, I don't know any good tailors in Bovingdon.

I can beat you in that department.

I've contrived to fuck up my entire life in the space of one and a half school years. I've lost two relatives in 8 months. I'm actually living to pass the time until university......:(

I lost my grandad in July, the day before I went on holiday, but he died less than a month after he got diagnosed with lung cancer-so he didn't suffer. But I'm failing courses at school and, despite being sixteen, I still get teased and bullied. Other things that I won't divulge on here are driving me insane.

No that's down the hall in the semen and gooey covered room.

Covered in semen and gooey? Whats the gooey?

Covered in semen and gooey? Whats the gooey?

cum.

It was the best I could do, I don't know any good tailors in Bovingdon.

Well, it's a tiny little village with a high street. I work in one of the shops on that high street. It's a hectic life. :rolleyes: :p

I lost my grandad in July, the day before I went on holiday, but he died less than a month after he got diagnosed with lung cancer-so he didn't suffer. But I'm failing courses at school and, despite being sixteen, I still get teased and bullied. Other things that I won't divulge on here are driving me insane.

My condolances, sympathies, and other such emotions.

I'd love to say it will get better in Sixth form, but my life got worse.....

My condolances, sympathies, and other such emotions.

I'd love to say it will get better in Sixth form, but my life got worse.....

Oh it's on a downhill trend already, I already noticed that one. I don't have high expectations.
And condolences to you too. Sounds like a few NSers have had a rough time.

Oh it's on a downhill trend already, I already noticed that one. I don't have high expectations.
And condolences to you too. Sounds like a few NSers have had a rough time.

I'd say looking for normal people on NS is like seeking the Holy Grail really....:p

Victim of the middle classes?

I lost my grandad in July, the day before I went on holiday, but he died less than a month after he got diagnosed with lung cancer-so he didn't suffer. But I'm failing courses at school and, despite being sixteen, I still get teased and bullied. Other things that I won't divulge on here are driving me insane.

Condolences on your grandad. As for the bullying, I can't say much about that, but you could talk to Darknovae, she puts up with it in her school and might have some insights.

To reiterate what I said above, the first hard part of therapy is finding someone you feel comfortable with. It's hard later on, too, when you actually deal with issues, but that's also progress, so it feels good.

Condolences on your grandad. As for the bullying, I can't say much about that, but you could talk to Darknovae, she puts up with it in her school and might have some insights.

I've been bullied for about ten years now. It sucks arse.

To reiterate what I said above, the first hard part of therapy is finding someone you feel comfortable with. It's hard later on, too, when you actually deal with issues, but that's also progress, so it feels good.

Right now, I know it sounds weird, but I'm far too busy to have therapy. Exams, coursework, my job, I actually have no spare time. Another thing that's driving me up the fecking wall.

Right now, I know it sounds weird, but I'm far too busy to have therapy. Exams, coursework, my job, I actually have no spare time. Another thing that's driving me up the fecking wall.

Could be you're just damned tired, too. That'll screw you up pretty good.

Therapy is something that takes time to work. And you may need to try diferent therapists, because the bond between the therapist and client is very important for the treatment.

Could be you're just damned tired, too. That'll screw you up pretty good.

I've been told I look physically exhausted. I'm starting to feel it too.

I've been told I look physically exhausted. I'm starting to feel it too.

Well, to quote that great American philosopher, Andy Rooney, go to bed. Whatever you're staying up for isn't worth it.

Wait, isn't this the chronic masturbater's discussion group?

Have you ever noticed that no one ever shakes anyone else's hands at the meetings?
Not that I have ever been...

I think I may have said too much :eek:

Back to the topic at hand...hehehe

I am in therapy now and I have made some progress.
I tried it several years ago and did not make much progress then.
But I literally had to do something as I was severely depressed and basically a huge mess.

I know how you feel about intimacy also Wilgrove.
After my wife dumped me and I discovered that she cheated on me and got an abortion behind my back when we were together I did not think I would ever be able to trust another woman.

I am finally coming to terms with her betrayals (which hit me very hard because I thought she was the one person in this world I could truly trust and count on) and I am looking forward instead of backwards.

If you think therapy may help you I advise you to give it a try.

Ok so most of yall know from my Soul Searching thread (which I have linked) that I have some issues to work out.

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=514153

So I thought I would try therapy (again). I've already tried it twice but I dunno if I actually got anywhere with it. Both time it was just some guy nodding and saying "How does that make you feel." and "Tell me more." God if I wanted useless babbling and nodding, I would buy a talking bobble head doll. I would like a therapist that can offer real answers and real advice. However, I do have a fear that he would want to do some test and those test would find that I have a chemical imbalance, like bi-polar, etc. I do not want to take any such test because, well, there are certain things that can ban a person from flying, and being diagnosed with certain mental condition can do that. I do not want to give up the one thing that may be keeping me sane.

So, have anyone here ever taken therapy and how did it work out for you guys?

Talking to me can drive you into therapy.....

Well, I saw two counselors from the university counseling center back in college, and that was okay I suppose. I tended to sabotage it by lying. Then about a year ago I tried a counselor recommended by the employee mental health program, and it was pretty much just some old lady that liked to give advice. Then I saw a counselor that some people I know went to and liked, and she seemed to be way too into bibliotherapy with fad psych books (like Dr. Phil, ugh). How intelligent could she have been?

Anyway, I'll be trying again soon. I think I'll look though my school's counseling center again with some referrals. I'm trying to find a systems counselor, I think that is what I really need. Therapy is different every time, depending on what you're going through, who you are at the time, and who you see. You have to find a good match and be willing to put in the work.

Did I mention that I intend to become an independant counselor? Right now I'm in school to become a school counselor, but I'm planning for that to be a stepping stone on my way to private practice.

Ok so most of yall know from my Soul Searching thread (which I have linked) that I have some issues to work out.

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=514153

So I thought I would try therapy (again). I've already tried it twice but I dunno if I actually got anywhere with it. Both time it was just some guy nodding and saying "How does that make you feel." and "Tell me more." God if I wanted useless babbling and nodding, I would buy a talking bobble head doll. I would like a therapist that can offer real answers and real advice. However, I do have a fear that he would want to do some test and those test would find that I have a chemical imbalance, like bi-polar, etc. I do not want to take any such test because, well, there are certain things that can ban a person from flying, and being diagnosed with certain mental condition can do that. I do not want to give up the one thing that may be keeping me sane.

So, have anyone here ever taken therapy and how did it work out for you guys?Therapists do not offer advice. At least they shouldn't. The whole point of a Therapist is that they will honnestly listen to what you have to say and will not tell you what to do. They are supposed to help you find the solution from within yourself.

It's like I could say in response to your post. 'You're angry. And you're angry because you're American. If you went to Canda and got a Canadian passport then you wouldn't be so angry anymore'.

I may has easily and completely misinterpreted the situation.

A therapist will ask you how're feeling, and then why you feel like that, and finally what do you think your options are in the situation. Except they will try to do it in a more round about way. They will take notes and if you seem to get stuck they might suggest that you talk about a certain topic which they sense is important.

I don't respond well to therapy. I want someone to give me a possible solution to which I can analyse, and then agree with or disagree with. If I disagree with it then it normally helps me to contruct my own solution to my problem.

And not everything you say to a therapist is confidential. For instance if you talk about a suspected terrorist or a terrorist plot to a therapist in the UK then the therapist is obliged to report this to the police immediately. As I remember there are other exceptions as well, but I forget them.

Therapists do not offer advice. At least they shouldn't. The whole point of a Therapist is that they will honnestly listen to what you have to say and will not tell you what to do. They are supposed to help you find the solution from within yourself.

It's like I could say in response to your post. 'You're angry. And you're angry because you're American. If you went to Canda and got a Canadian passport then you wouldn't be so angry anymore'.

I may has easily and completely misinterpreted the situation.

A therapist will ask you how're feeling, and then why you feel like that, and finally what do you think your options are in the situation. Except they will try to do it in a more round about way. They will take notes and if you seem to get stuck they might suggest that you talk about a certain topic which they sense is important.

I don't respond well to therapy. I want someone to give me a possible solution to which I can analyse, and then agree with or disagree with. If I disagree with it then it normally helps me to contruct my own solution to my problem.

You can find a therapist like that. As I said, it depends who you go to and what theory/standpoint they espouse. This guy was going to somebody who was a strict psychoanalyst or Rogerian. Most counselors are at least a little more interactive than that.

And not everything you say to a therapist is confidential. For instance if you talk about a suspected terrorist or a terrorist plot to a therapist in the UK then the therapist is obliged to report this to the police immediately. As I remember there are other exceptions as well, but I forget them.

Exceptions to confidentiality: Harm to self or others. If you tell your therapist you're going to go kill somebody, they can't keep that a secret anymore.

Well, I saw two counselors from the university counseling center back in college, and that was okay I suppose. I tended to sabotage it by lying. Then about a year ago I tried a counselor recommended by the employee mental health program, and it was pretty much just some old lady that liked to give advice. Then I saw a counselor that some people I know went to and liked, and she seemed to be way too into bibliotherapy with fad psych books (like Dr. Phil, ugh). How intelligent could she have been?

Anyway, I'll be trying again soon. I think I'll look though my school's counseling center again with some referrals. I'm trying to find a systems counselor, I think that is what I really need. Therapy is different every time, depending on what you're going through, who you are at the time, and who you see. You have to find a good match and be willing to put in the work.

I get a lot of help from cognitive therapy, although that's mostly because my thought patterns are flawed, so changing them really changes my situation.

nope, never gotten therapy. tried getting just a counsellor but in this area the NHS sucks for mental health stuff, and i can't be bothered to go private. i'd like to but i don't really need it - i'm starting to figure stuff out on my own, particularly with the help of meds from my doctor, allowing me to objectively think about stuff.

VIOLATION: You're not allowed to say that NHS sucks. Stand by to be fined for your violation.

I get a lot of help from cognitive therapy, although that's mostly because my thought patterns are flawed, so changing them really changes my situation.

I can certainly see that. Pretty much any cognitive therapist will come at you with the angle that you are unhappy because your thought patterns are flawed, and help you correct them. That's a pretty directive therapy right there.

Whatever happened to the idea that sometimes, people get depressed and are unhappy - and that it's perfectly natural?

I can certainly see that. Pretty much any cognitive therapist will come at you with the angle that you are unhappy because your thought patterns are flawed, and help you correct them. That's a pretty directive therapy right there.

it's really helped me, before when someone would say something I would take it personally, now I don't.

for example a random conversation

"what's for dinner?"
"I don't know yet"
"oh, so what did you do today?"

what I used to hear was "you never do anything right, you are a bad wife, you can't even get dinner on the table, look at this house"

what I hear now is


"what's for dinner?"

"oh, so what did you do today?"

I'd quite like to go to a therapist. I firmly believe that my stance is an entirely rational and sound one in its despair at the stupidities of this world, and would rather like professional backing on that. However, as has been said before, Public mental health bodies generally aren't that good.

Whatever happened to the idea that sometimes, people get depressed and are unhappy - and that it's perfectly natural?

I don't like to be unhappy, if something I am doing is causing it, then I want to change it.

I don't like to be unhappy, if something I am doing is causing it, then I want to change it.

Sure. But where does this cross the line where people say, "ooh, I feel sad today, so I'm going to see a therapist and make it stop" or "I'll take some Prozac or Xanax and I'll feel better"?

Terrible, chronic depression, yes - by all means get help. But a little down? Occasionally unhappy? Actual life events taking place that are beyond your control?

Sure. But where does this cross the line where people say, "ooh, I feel sad today, so I'm going to see a therapist and make it stop" or "I'll take some Prozac or Xanax and I'll feel better"?

Terrible, chronic depression, yes - by all means get help. But a little down? Occasionally unhappy? Actual life events taking place that are beyond your control?

part of therapy (for me at least) was learning how to analyze the situation, figure out what was really going on, and what I could control and what I could not.

as far as the drugs, just about everyone self medicates in one way or another.

I've thought about it in the past, but came to the conclusion that they probably would dose me up on meds even if they didn't find anything wrong with me (because I have perfectly normal and seemingly well-adjusted friends who became virtual zombies after being put on cocktails of anti-depressants...yeah, not for me.)

Anyway, i'm perfectly capable of self medication. ;) (and i'm actually feeling good at the moment anyway)

Ok so most of yall know from my Soul Searching thread (which I have linked) that I have some issues to work out.

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=514153

So I thought I would try therapy (again). I've already tried it twice but I dunno if I actually got anywhere with it. Both time it was just some guy nodding and saying "How does that make you feel." and "Tell me more." God if I wanted useless babbling and nodding, I would buy a talking bobble head doll. I would like a therapist that can offer real answers and real advice.

Sounds like you had some bad therapists. There are bad therapists, just like there are lousy doctors or crappy lawyers, but you shouldn't assume that all of them suck.

I'm lucky because my mother is a PhD therapist herself, so when I needed a therapist of my own she was able to recommend several individuals who she knew professionally. She also knows my personality, so she was able to suggest people who were more likely to be a good fit to me and my needs. That's a big part of successful therapy: you have to be able to work well with your therapist, or it's not going to work. You could have a great therapist but have a lousy time because their style conflicts with yours too much.


However, I do have a fear that he would want to do some test and those test would find that I have a chemical imbalance, like bi-polar, etc. I do not want to take any such test because, well, there are certain things that can ban a person from flying, and being diagnosed with certain mental condition can do that. I do not want to give up the one thing that may be keeping me sane.

While I completely understand your fear, you have to be aware that you're not going to be able to really solve major problems if you refuse to even allow yourself to be tested thoroughly. You can't blame a doctor for failing to treat you well if you refuse to let her run the necessary tests.


So, have anyone here ever taken therapy and how did it work out for you guys?
I had mixed success. I went into therapy for help with several problems, the main one being clinical depression. I also began drug therapy to help the depression during this time. I think the therapy helped me deal with some problems that drugs could not possibly address. I think my sessions with my therapist made me feel better, and helped me identify some things I needed to change or work on.

I still have depression. I probably always will. Therapy didn't "cure" me of that, and I don't think it ever could. But therapy helped me to find a way to live with myself and be happier within my own mind. I guess it helped me attain some balance, which is what I really needed. It didn't magic away any problems or make me suddenly perfectly happy and sane, but it did help me feel like I'm in control of myself again.

I actually have to give it out a bit in my Students' Union to people who want it, being the Ed. and Welfare officer. It's quite taxing work, but it's quite rewarding too, I suppose.

Whatever happened to the idea that sometimes, people get depressed and are unhappy - and that it's perfectly natural?
It's perfectly natural for people to get headaches, too. And it's equally natural for them to dislike having a headache and seek to alleviate the pain.

It's perfectly natural for people to get headaches, too. And it's equally natural for them to dislike having a headache and seek to alleviate the pain.

Here's a shot of Demerol, and some clean sheets.

Sure. But where does this cross the line where people say, "ooh, I feel sad today, so I'm going to see a therapist and make it stop" or "I'll take some Prozac or Xanax and I'll feel better"?

Terrible, chronic depression, yes - by all means get help. But a little down? Occasionally unhappy? Actual life events taking place that are beyond your control?
The idea with therapy is that the individual wants to address something that is bothering them. A good therapist will be careful in assessing whether the "something" is an external issue (i.e. actual life events taking place that are beyond their control), something internal (i.e. a physiological problem that needs to be addressed with drug therapy or medical intervention), or a combination of the two.

Most often the answer is that it's a combination of the two. People have external events in their life that need to be dealt with, and their internal mental state is muddled or disrupted in a way that is interfering with their ability to cope. It doesn't matter how "objectively" serious the issues are, it just matters how much the individual wants to deal with them. It's like how you are allowed to go to the doctor for your sore throat, even though another person might shrug it off as nothing. If your throat is sore enough to bother YOU, then you should deal with it however you feel is appropriate.

My own depression would flare up in response to very real problems and stresses in my life. However, my therapist helped me to identify how my mental state would spiral out of control in response to normal issues and problems. For instance, if I was worried about making a tuition payment, I would soon find myself literally unable to eat, sleep, or function because I was consumed with envisioning the various ways in which my entire life would be ruined forever because of my payment being one day late. It is completely normal and reasonable to worry about making a tuition payment; it is not normal to go bonkers the way I did.

A good therapist helped to spot the several issues in play with my situation. First, I absolutely was experiencing a chemical imbalance that needed to be addressed with medication. However, I also had to learn some coping strategies and ways to deal with stress. I had to "relearn" how to feel stressed without going crazy over it. I had to learn how to feel sad without spiraling down to near-suicidal levels. I'm still working on a lot of this!

Real-life problems are still going to be a part of my life. Drug treatment isn't going to change that. That's why therapy was helpful to me: it helped me to understand how to deal with my depression as a chronic disease, while also helping me to cope with my real life problems as they come along.