NationStates Jolt Archive

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

So I drafted a letter, that explicitly states I am very attracted too her, and would love a chance too get too know her better. Dont get me wrong, in addition too being very pretty, shes quite intellient, and very polite.

So i'll probably slide it into her back pack on tueday...Is this a good idea?

no.

you should just ask her out.

Haven’t you seen enough movies to know that what is going to happen is she is going to think someone else gave her the letter, which will make her bold enough to approach that person, and then a whirlwind romance will ensure, causing you to be eternally bitter about being the catalyst?

no.

you should just ask her out.


-.- Im not really the most confident guy. Yes yes, im using the cliche' "fear of rejection" excuse here, but thats really what it boils down too.

Haven’t you seen enough movies to know that what is going to happen is she is going to think someone else gave her the letter, which will make her bold enough to approach that person, and then a whirlwind romance will ensure, causing you to be eternally bitter about being the catalyst?

....

....

....

My god. My god... I better move too the abandon opera house attic now, and dawn my mask, eh?

no.

you should just ask her out.

I agree, just ask her out. I hate to be a grammar Nazi, but if you do go with the letter, please don't write "too" where you mean "to" and please review the proper use of the apostrophe in English. And the first person promoun ("I") is always capitalized. If I were the recipient of an anonymous letter and it contained as many errors as the OP, it'd go straight into the trash.

-.- Im not really the most confident guy. Yes yes, im using the cliche' "fear of rejection" excuse here, but thats really what it boils down too.

if you are really afraid of rejection you should just forget about the whole thing, people who don't put themselves out there to be rejected, almost never do.

If you go out with her, you are going to end up talking, anyway - may as well start practicing, eh?

I agree, just ask her out. I hate to be a grammar Nazi, but if you do go with the letter, please don't write "too" where you mean "to" and please review the proper use of the apostrophe in English. And the first person promoun ("I") is always capitalized. If I were the recipient of an anonymous letter and it contained as many errors as the OP, it'd go straight into the trash.

Erm, are you referring too me? I know I'm not quoted here, but those do sound like common grammatical mistakes I make.

Erm, whats a promoun?

If you go out with her, you are going to end up talking, anyway - may as well start practicing, eh?

From what I've experience, I don't thin shes really interested in me, as conversation between us, no matter how much I attempt too step it up from a standard "classmate" conversation, never really happens. =/

I find them to be lame.

Okay heres what you should do. Keep the letter. Sign your name. Ask her to meet you in a park or something where you can talk to her in the letter then slip it in her backpack. At worst rejection is delayed. At best she'll at least try out having a relationship with youy. Hope that helps.

Erm, are you referring too me? I know I'm not quoted here, but those do sound like common grammatical mistakes I make.

Erm, whats a promoun?

Ahem ... proNoun. And yes, I was referring to you. I know the interwebs are all about speed and fastness and such, but the bandwidth or whatever the hell is sufficient to type correct English. You do get allowance if English is not your first language.

Ahem ... proNoun. And yes, I was referring to you. I know the interwebs are all about speed and fastness and such, but the bandwidth or whatever the hell is sufficient to type correct English. You do get allowance if English is not your first language.

If it makes you feel better, the letter i've drafted has been revised- down too a science really. (My OCD induced "too" does not appear)

I find them to be lame.

I did too. But, it's a fairly straightforward, indirect approach.

From what I've experience, I don't thin shes really interested in me, as conversation between us, no matter how much I attempt too step it up from a standard "classmate" conversation, never really happens. =/

this is an indication that she's not into you. you cant change that with a letter. no one wants a love letter from someone they arent interested in.

dont do it.

love letters are for when you are in an actual relationship with someone. without a relationship they are just creepy.

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

So you do not actually know her at all, and it is quite possible that spending some time alone with her would be a turn-off ?

Just aks her out. Worst thing that can happen is that she says no and starts mocking you, together with some classmates. Still much better than your letter being copied and spread.

So you do not actually know her at all, and it is quite possible that spending some time alone with her would be a turn-off ?

Just aks her out. Worst thing that can happen is that she says no and starts mocking you, together with some classmates. Still much better than your letter being copied and spread.


No, no no. She knows a bit about me, as I too her. I wouldn't send her such a letter if I didn't know things as basic as her name, age, likes/dislikes, grades, all that ruff.

As for the letter being copied, shes a very nice and polite girl, but thats still a danger...But if the letter remains unsigned, and she wishes too mock the author, good luck breaking my "never seen it before, you just try and prove it" defense.

I stand by my hypotheticals. Worked out a lot better than the flowers.

Start practicing with girls you don't feel attraction to (you're just going to invite them out, not propose to them) and work your way up on the attractiveness scale. By the time you get to her you will have worked up enough confidence to ask her out. Or met someone more interesting along the way. Either way, it's a win-win.

this is an indication that she's not into you. you cant change that with a letter. no one wants a love letter from someone they arent interested in.

dont do it.

love letters are for when you are in an actual relationship with someone. without a relationship they are just creepy.

Thats a good point. Why start a relationship so indirectly, when in truth, a romantic relationship is the closest you can be too someone.

I had that same problem this summer...apathetic one word responses. I eventually went for it, but was too late...

So just ask her, as hard as it may seem...

If you want to tell her without telling her, maybe find a friend of hers or someone who knows her to somehow leak it...consult others about this...I'm not sure if it's a good idea...

May as well not do anything. Much easier, with as much chance of a dare as an anonymous love letter.

Start practicing with girls you don't feel attraction to (you're just going to invite them out, not propose to them) and work your way up on the attractiveness scale. By the time you get to her you will have worked up enough confidence to ask her out. Or met someone more interesting along the way. Either way, it's a win-win.

Now thats a good plan. But what if I ask a girl out i'm not too into too, and she pursues one of those "lack of space" relationships, (IE constant calls, switches classes too just be with you, etc)

From what I've experience, I don't thin shes really interested in me, as conversation between us, no matter how much I attempt too step it up from a standard "classmate" conversation, never really happens. =/

Then you're sunk, dude. Move on. You're not going to get it right on the first try. If all you've had is cursory conversation an anonymous love note is either going to freak her the fuck out, assure her that you are a little off, or-worst case scenario, show it to pretty much everybody and it will follow you like a little storm cloud for the rest of the time at that school. Of course this is assuming that she figures out it's you. If she doesn't, I don't know what the point is...I guess if she does start making fun of it you can join in like it wasn't you...just seems like a silly idea. I don't see it working out in any way. Except the way Neesika outlined.

I had that same problem this summer...apathetic one word responses. I eventually went for it, but was too late...

So just ask her, as hard as it may seem...

Apathetic one word responses, exactly the boat i'm in.

And by, "went for it" what do you mean?

"Too late"?

From what I've experience, I don't thin shes really interested in me, as conversation between us, no matter how much I attempt too step it up from a standard "classmate" conversation, never really happens. =/

Use active listening. Ask an open-ended question (not one that can be answered with yes/no) and then follow up with another question based on what she said.

Girls love that sort of thing. Actually, pretty much everybody likes to know they're being paid attention.

Now thats a good plan. But what if I ask a girl out i'm not too into too, and she pursues one of those "lack of space" relationships, (IE constant calls, switches classes too just be with you, etc)

Then you're rather screwed. You can't ask a girl out yet, can you break up with one?

Then you're sunk, dude. Move on. You're not going to get it right on the first try. If all you've had is cursory conversation an anonymous love note is either going to freak her the fuck out, assure her that you are a little off, or-worst case scenario, show it to pretty much everybody and it will follow you like a little storm cloud for the rest of the time at that school. Of course this is assuming that she figures out it's you. If she doesn't, I don't know what the point is...I guess if she does start making fun of it you can join in like it wasn't you...just seems like a silly idea. I don't see it working out in any way. Except the way Neesika outlined.

Perhaps i've ben too modest concerning her feelings toward me, but I just don't know how too tell....Or measur eit as it were.

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

So I drafted a letter, that explicitly states I am very attracted too her, and would love a chance too get too know her better. Dont get me wrong, in addition too being very pretty, shes quite intellient, and very polite.

So i'll probably slide it into her back pack on tueday...Is this a good idea?

Bad, bad, bad, bad idea.

1. First of all, it's stalker-like and creepy.

2. The girl WILL wonder why you wrote the letter instead of talking to her. (Even if you attempt to explain in the letter.) And the conclusions she will come to will not be favorable to you.

3. Did I mention it's stalker-like and creepy? When you're a kid that might not be much of a problem... then again, in this day and age, it might well be. You could get charged with sexual harassment. Restraining orders are inconvenient.

4. You're not avoiding rejection at all. She can reject you just fine by letter. Only in this case, she can take your letter and show it to all her friends for a laugh. Then when she's done she can publish it electronically or physically to the entire school and all YOUR friends will have a laugh. If it's a small enough town eventually you'll find that everyone you know, knows about it and will be laughing at you for the rest of your life.

5. Dude, it's like some Norman Bates kinda thing.

6. It's not romantic, it's sappy and frankly childish.

Anyway, from what little info I have, it seems like the problem is you and her don't have any real personal connection. You like her, but she's "polite" to you. You're not even a friend. In all probability, you don't know her very well at all and she thinks of you as "that one guy." So proclamations of love at this point are only fooling yourself.

What you need to do is develop a real relationship with her. This is not the way to go about it. If you are too shy to talk with her now, you will also be too shy to talk to her after she's read (and laughed at :p) your letter. The only way you will get over this is by talking with her.

Apathetic one word responses, exactly the boat i'm in.

Not uncommon.

And by, "went for it" what do you mean?

Asked her out?

"Too late"?

Found a boyfriend, likely. Also common, for those that stall.

Then you're rather screwed. You can't ask a girl out yet, can you break up with one?

...the hypothetical is key...

I suppose I could.

Perhaps i've ben too modest concerning her feelings toward me, but I just don't know how too tell....Or measur eit as it were.

Again, welcome to the world of...Every other guy your age. Ever.

Now thats a good plan. But what if I ask a girl out i'm not too into too, and she pursues one of those "lack of space" relationships, (IE constant calls, switches classes too just be with you, etc)

Not to be rude or anything, but the probabilities of that happening are very low, not because of you, it simply happens rather rarely (though I had a stalker for a time, and I barely ever said hi to her!) and you can always give them the "lets just be friends" talk.

...the hypothetical is key...

:confused:

Bad, bad, bad, bad idea.

1. First of all, it's stalker-like and creepy.

2. The girl WILL wonder why you wrote the letter instead of talking to her. (Even if you attempt to explain in the letter.) And the conclusions she will come to will not be favorable to you.

3. Did I mention it's stalker-like and creepy? When you're a kid that might not be much of a problem... then again, in this day and age, it might well be. You could get charged with sexual harassment. Restraining orders are inconvenient.

4. You're not avoiding rejection at all. She can reject you just fine by letter. Only in this case, she can take your letter and show it to all her friends for a laugh. Then when she's done she can publish it electronically or physically to the entire school and all YOUR friends will have a laugh. If it's a small enough town eventually you'll find that everyone you know, knows about it and will be laughing at you for the rest of your life.

5. Dude, it's like some Norman Bates kinda thing.

6. It's not romantic, it's sappy and frankly childish.

Anyway, from what little info I have, it seems like the problem is you and her don't have any real personal connection. You like her, but she's "polite" to you. You're not even a friend. In all probability, you don't know her very well at all and she thinks of you as "that one guy." So proclamations of love at this point are only fooling yourself.

What you need to do is develop a real relationship with her. This is not the way to go about it. If you are too shy to talk with her now, you will also be too shy to talk to her after she's read (and laughed at :p) your letter. The only way you will get over this is by talking with her.

1. I always though "stalker creepy" entailed her never speaking too me, nor knowing my name, and me having a disfunction with ny nasal passages in which I breath unusually loud...

2. Thats very true.

3. You can now be charged for sexual harrasment for writing a letter that does not have anything mildly sexually explicit in it? My god what have we come too...

4. Quite the optimist aren't you?

5. *Wikis*

6. Erm, yes I suppose...

Thanks for the advice mate. :)

:confused:

Sorry, I was just being weird. When dealing with these things I tend to use 'hypothetical' questions that obviously aren't. It's makes me comfortable and often gets a laugh out of the girl. *shrug*

:confused:

He means I should visualize and predict which course of action would suit me best. *Massages temples and looks into future*

He means I should visualize and predict which course of action would suit me best. *Massages temples and looks into future*

Actually, no...Never run through it it your head, that's baaaaad.

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

So I drafted a letter, that explicitly states I am very attracted too her, and would love a chance too get too know her better. Dont get me wrong, in addition too being very pretty, shes quite intellient, and very polite.

So i'll probably slide it into her back pack on tueday...Is this a good idea?

being the LAST person to give such advice...

since Valentines day is near, sign your letter (don't make it annonymous), put your letter in a card, and give it to her with a chocolate rose or something on Valentines Day.

Apathetic one word responses, exactly the boat i'm in.

And by, "went for it" what do you mean?

"Too late"?

I eventually did ask her...on AIM...which brings up another thing: NEVER ASK A GIRL OUT IN AN IM! Even if you're desperate, it's better to not do it at all than use an IM.

Too late means she had a boyfriend already.


*inconspicuously, pokes MSN Messenger...*

1. I always though "stalker creepy" entailed her never speaking too me, nor knowing my name, and me having a disfunction with ny nasal passages in which I breath unusually loud...

That too. But this works just fine on that end, trust me.

3. You can now be charged for sexual harrasment for writing a letter that does not have anything mildly sexually explicit in it? My god what have we come too...


Well, you can probably be charged for sexual harassment for saying, "Hey there, sugartits" too. Only with a letter, there's hard evidence, so conviction is more likely.


4. Quite the optimist aren't you?

Well, let's just say I speak from experience on this one.

It wasn't nearly *that* bad, but when you're a kid it's bad enough.


Thanks for the advice mate. :)

No problem. I would also add that just... well. A love letter, no matter how well-written, is still too much, too soon. It would actually be safer and put much less pressure on her just to ask her to hang out sometime. You can always pass that off as ... just asking to hang out - no need to make it "asking out on a date" which is in reality just a social construct anyway.

Of course, if you want to be stalker-like, you can just find out where she goes after class or on the weekends, and arrange to just 'coincidentally' happen to 'bump into' her there sometime. Then you can be all, "Whoa, you like to watch Turkish belly dancing too? SO DO I!"

to me an anonymous letter would be really creepy and i'd start to worry about a stalker. if you're going to do this, sign your name. i've no idea if love letters work having never actually managed to send one myself but i've written a few and i think it is a good thing to get your feelings down on paper, if only for some peace of mind.

Then you can be all, "Whoa, you like to watch Turkish belly dancing too? SO DO I!"

Mmmm....Turkish girls... :D

Actually, no...Never run through it it your head, that's baaaaad.

Why? Your mind will automatically run through the worst case scenarios? It's not really happening for me, i'm pretty sensible when it comes too foresight.

I eventually did ask her...on AIM...which brings up another thing: NEVER ASK A GIRL OUT IN AN IM! Even if you're desperate, it's better to not do it at all than use an IM.

Too late means she had a boyfriend already.


*inconspicuously, pokes MSN Messenger...*

You ask'd someone out...online?

*Prepares shoulder too cry on*


(I know better mate. :) )

if you are really afraid of rejection you should just forget about the whole thing, people who don't put themselves out there to be rejected, almost never do.

I like the cut of your jib. :)

to me an anonymous letter would be really creepy and i'd start to worry about a stalker. if you're going to do this, sign your name. i've no idea if love letters work having never actually managed to send one myself but i've written a few and i think it is a good thing to get your feelings down on paper, if only for some peace of mind.

Thats true, I suppose that could be the purpose of what i've written now.

Why? Your mind will automatically run through the worst case scenarios? It's not really happening for me, i'm pretty sensible when it comes too foresight.

Nah. Well maybe. I dunno. I know the more I imagine doing something, the less imperative I have to do it. It's useful, for imagining say...pounding someone's face in, or stuff like that.

That too. But this works just fine on that end, trust me.



Well, you can probably be charged for sexual harassment for saying, "Hey there, sugartits" too. Only with a letter, there's hard evidence, so conviction is more likely.



Well, let's just say I speak from experience on this one.

It wasn't nearly *that* bad, but when you're a kid it's bad enough.



No problem. I would also add that just... well. A love letter, no matter how well-written, is still too much, too soon. It would actually be safer and put much less pressure on her just to ask her to hang out sometime. You can always pass that off as ... just asking to hang out - no need to make it "asking out on a date" which is in reality just a social construct anyway.

Of course, if you want to be stalker-like, you can just find out where she goes after class or on the weekends, and arrange to just 'coincidentally' happen to 'bump into' her there sometime. Then you can be all, "Whoa, you like to watch Turkish belly dancing too? SO DO I!"

..."Hey sugartits?" Erm, I SOMEHOW managed too refrain from such explicitives.

Sorry for your little expierience....Care too share the story, or are you still drinking a bottle of vodka every night too repress the thought?

You ask'd someone out...online?

*Prepares shoulder too cry on*


(I know better mate. :) )

Yeah...I couldn't get it together and knew it was wrong, but was sort of pushed by evil demons, so to speak...

*again inconspicuously, pokes MSN Messenger...*

Nah. Well maybe. I dunno. I know the more I imagine doing something, the less imperative I have to do it. It's useful, for imagining say...pounding someone's face in, or stuff like that.

Ah yes...The typical "beat the fuck out of the guy who made fun of you in gym class" fantasy....Oh the nostalgia....

Yeah...I couldn't get it together and knew it was wrong, but was sort of pushed by evil demons, so to speak...

*again inconspicuously, pokes MSN Messenger...*

Maybe not so much evil demons, perhaps an alternate personality, or a fist sized brain tumor?

*Sends virus that kills your MSN*

Its for your own good mate.

EDIT: I have too do this. 1500 posts WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT

Society seems to have moved past love letters. And from the sound of it, it's likely that she doesn't like you, at least not in that way, and giving her a letter, even though she mightn't tell anybody else (often, though, it gets out and that can be embarassing), would make her rather uncomfortable around you. Maybe you should try becoming good friends, and see if anything happens from there. Perhaps, even then, if she doesn't like you, she'll introduce you to an equally nice friend, although that may be taking it too far.

Maybe not so much evil demons, perhaps an alternate personality, or a fist sized brain tumor?

*Sends virus that kills your MSN*

Its for your own good mate.

EDIT: I have too do this. 1500 posts WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT

Nah, part of it was this fellow who was sick of hearing my whining...

I meant get on MSN so we can converse live. :)


Society seems to have moved past love letters. And from the sound of it, it's likely that she doesn't like you, at least not in that way, and giving her a letter, even though she mightn't tell anybody else (often, though, it gets out and that can be embarassing), would make her rather uncomfortable around you. Maybe you should try becoming good friends, and see if anything happens from there. Perhaps, even then, if she doesn't like you, she'll introduce you to an equally nice friend, although that may be taking it too far.

I think he tried that...and so did I. It only works if she wants a friend...

..."Hey sugartits?" Erm, I SOMEHOW managed too refrain from such explicitives.

Too bad. Now that I think about it, that kind of letter might be worth writing.

...

Well, probably not.

Sorry for your little expierience....Care too share the story, or are you still drinking a bottle of vodka every night too repress the thought?

It was real big when I was 11. Now it's just sorta amusingly naive.

There was a girl I liked and for reasons much like yours, I wrote a letter. I think it was anonymous, but it didn't stay anonymous. At least, everyone in my little world wound up knowing about it. Too bad I don't still have it - its probably hilarious.

Anyway, its just one minor experience of mine that helped to show that letter-writing is not the right way. Same with, as others have said, MSN or AIM or anything. All for the same reason - if you want to get with a girl, you have to do two things:

1. Interact. Reading and writing is good for information transmission, but bad for personal interaction.

2. Show confidence. I don't think writing anonymous (or even non-anonymous) letters does that and most girls I know would agree.

3. Show initiative. You're doing that by taking the first steps here, so that's good.

There are other things too I could list but you get the idea. Mainly I'm just trying to steer you away from writing a letter. Love letters are really for when you already have a relationship.

Society seems to have moved past love letters. And from the sound of it, it's likely that she doesn't like you, at least not in that way, and giving her a letter, even though she mightn't tell anybody else (often, though, it gets out and that can be embarassing), would make her rather uncomfortable around you. Maybe you should try becoming good friends, and see if anything happens from there. Perhaps, even then, if she doesn't like you, she'll introduce you to an equally nice friend, although that may be taking it too far.

A perfectly sensible statement. Thank you.

Nah, part of it was this fellow who was sick of hearing my whining...

I meant get on MSN so we can converse live. :)




I think he tried that...and so did I. It only works if she wants a friend...


I am on MSN...

Too bad. Now that I think about it, that kind of letter might be worth writing.

...

Well, probably not.



It was real big when I was 11. Now it's just sorta amusingly naive.

There was a girl I liked and for reasons much like yours, I wrote a letter. I think it was anonymous, but it didn't stay anonymous. At least, everyone in my little world wound up knowing about it. Too bad I don't still have it - its probably hilarious.

Anyway, its just one minor experience of mine that helped to show that letter-writing is not the right way. Same with, as others have said, MSN or AIM or anything. All for the same reason - if you want to get with a girl, you have to do two things:

1. Interact. Reading and writing is good for information transmission, but bad for personal interaction.

2. Show confidence. I don't think writing anonymous (or even non-anonymous) letters does that and most girls I know would agree.

3. Show initiative. You're doing that by taking the first steps here, so that's good.

There are other things too I could list but you get the idea. Mainly I'm just trying to steer you away from writing a letter. Love letters are really for when you already have a relationship.

*Hands shot glass full of vodka*

Start repressin mate!

*Hands shot glass full of vodka*

Start repressin mate!

lol, there may be things I'd like to repress, but that's really not one of them.

Like, I could tell you more about real restraining orders. But I won't. Cuz I'm gonna go drink now. :p

lol, there may be things I'd like to repress, but that's really not one of them.

Like, I could tell you more about real restraining orders. But I won't. Cuz I'm gonna go drink now. :p

=/

I recommend that you ask her out directly...a little bribery in the form of a cute gift never killed anyone either.

I recommend that you ask her out directly...a little bribery in the form of a cute gift never killed anyone either.

And exploiting Valentines day would be none less than perfect. Ill elect too do that. Now for the cute gift....

Some ideas:

*Dildo
*Buttplug
*Blow-up doll
*Porn mag

Bonus points if any of these items are previously used.

Have a star named after her

And exploiting Valentines day would be none less than perfect. Ill elect too do that. Now for the cute gift....

Well Cradle of FIlth and Killswitch Engage are both on tour....both would be perfect for a first date.

http://2.forumer.com/uploads/metanet/post-17-1165900502.jpg

I recommend that you ask her out directly...a little bribery in the form of a cute gift never killed anyone either.

i don't really get what's so special about asking someone you already know out to a bar or something. if she's in your class can't you say something like: "everybody is going to a bar/pub (how do you call that kind of establishment anyway) don't you want to come too?"

(Pic)

Where the hell do you get pics with that border?

Some ideas:

*Dildo
*Buttplug
*Blow-up doll
*Porn mag

Bonus points if any of these items are previously used.

Erm, I was thinking chocalete, or a flower. I can tell you have some interesting relationships...

Love letters from someone you've been dating for a while are sweet and romantic. Love letters from someone you vaguely know are creepy and rather pathetic. If you like this girl, ask her to hang out sometime. Don't buy her flowers, write odes to her beauty, or sing love songs outside her window; these things will most likely just serve to make her very uncomfortable. Just say something like "Hey, I'm going to go get some ice cream after class; want to come along? My treat!" If you're nervous about asking her on anything which might be interpreted as a date, start even smaller - recruit some friends to go do something with you and invite her as part of the group, then take advantage of that social time with her to get to know her better.

Erm, I was thinking chocalete, or a flower. I can tell you have some interesting relationships...

The best way to give my kind of gift is to carry it, unwrapped and uncovered, through class and walk right up to her desk and then just plunk it down obnoxiously and loudly. Mumble something incoherent with a wide, crazy-man grin, and then walk away. Later, if the police haven't been called yet, start humping her chair.

It's not worked for me yet but I'm convinced the idea is sound.

I think you should go out with her before valentines day, its not a good time to have a first date, theres too much pressure to be romantic and wonderful. Like Poli says get to know her first

The best way to give my kind of gift is to carry it, unwrapped and uncovered, through class and walk right up to her desk and then just plunk it down obnoxiously and loudly. Mumble something incoherent with a wide, crazy-man grin, and then walk away. Later, if the police haven't been called yet, start humping her chair.

It's not worked for me yet but I'm convinced the idea is sound.

I think I burst a lung reading that post....Wlecome too my siggy

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

*snip*


Sounds like she's not interested.

Sounds like she's not interested.

Thank you for reiterating that.

And exploiting Valentines day would be none less than perfect. Ill elect too do that. Now for the cute gift....

Danger Will Robinson! Danger!

Valentines isn't really a new relationship thing, it's for ones that have been going. A new date on that day, or related, is WAYYYYY too much pressure. Hell, it's almost too much pressure for people already dating...

Danger Will Robinson! Danger!

Valentines isn't really a new relationship thing, it's for ones that have been going. A new date on that day, or related, is WAYYYYY too much pressure. Hell, it's almost too much pressure for people already dating...

last year, in high school - in front of everybody, this guy walks to a girl. you could see how nervous he was, sweat dripping from his forehead etc. he kneels in front of the girl and gets a rose from his pocket and probably asks if she wants to be his girlfriend, or whatever it is that people ask in that kind of situations.
you can imagine it was the talk of the day, and not really nice for the girl or the boy. i think he is still desperatly searching for a girlfriend. but one has to admire his courage.

last year, in high school - in front of everybody, this guy walks to a girl. you could see how nervous he was, sweat dripping from his forehead etc. he kneels in front of the girl and gets a rose from his pocket and probably asks if she wants to be his girlfriend, or whatever it is that people ask in that kind of situations.
you can imagine it was the talk of the day, and not really nice for the girl or the boy. i think he is still desperatly searching for a girlfriend. but one has to admire his courage.

Did she accept his offer?

Did she accept his offer?

no, or not that i remember. she did become really red. i think they stayed 'just friends'. they had talked before that though and i think they still talked after that too.

really never try that, ever.

no, or not that i remember. she did become really red. i think they stayed 'just friends'. they had talked before that though and i think they still talked after that too.

really never try that, ever.

Don't kneel, at the very least. And put some thought into that flower!

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

So I drafted a letter, that explicitly states I am very attracted too her, and would love a chance too get too know her better. Dont get me wrong, in addition too being very pretty, shes quite intellient, and very polite.

So i'll probably slide it into her back pack on tueday...Is this a good idea?

As long as you don't chicken out like I did.

(is mad at self for being a wimp)

As long as you don't chicken out like I did.

(is mad at self for being a wimp)

Eh, you'll forgive yourself eventually.

As long as you don't chicken out like I did.

(is mad at self for being a wimp)

if i'm not mistaking (and sorry if i am) you are rather young, so you'll probably learn in the long run. not being a wimp isn't something you learn in a few days.

My method: Just be nice to her, then eventually in a week start a conversation. It always works. Theoretically.

My Method: Take the money you were going to spend on her, or any effort, and go buy a hooker.

Eh, you'll forgive yourself eventually.

Yeah, but I'm not getting another chance. She moved.

if i'm not mistaking (and sorry if i am) you are rather young, so you'll probably learn in the long run. not being a wimp isn't something you learn in a few days.

Yeah. I'm in middle school, so I still have a lot to learn about girls. I'll tell you one thing, though. Some of the sixth-graders (who are practically midgets) have gone farther than I have. Now that's adding insult to self-flagellation, yeah.

My Method: Take the money you were going to spend on her, or any effort, and go buy a hooker.

Lets see, the paper....plus the ink I printed on the paper....Ok So I would've spent 6 cents on her. Can you refer me too a hooker in my price range perhaps?

really never try that, ever.

Yup, I'd agree. Back in college, I had a guy set up a whole big Valentine's surprise for me - he bought me chocolates, made reservations at a fancy restaurant, told me he'd been pining for me for months, and so forth. I felt like the worst person in the world for turning him down, but I couldn't possibly do anything else, because I simply wasn't interested in any relationship at the time (and, to be honest, even if I had wanted a relationship, it wouldn't have been with him). I was honestly pretty angry with him for putting me in a position where I was made to feel guilty for not wanting a boyfriend. Just like with love letters, sweeping a girl off her feet with a grand romantic gesture can be fantastic when the girl in question is either dating you or married to you, but it is an extremely bad idea otherwise.

Yeah, but I'm not getting another chance. She moved.

*raises hand* So? I moved to Luxembourg, remember? I'm about six time zones off from three loose ends back in Michigan. You'll forgive yourself.

Yup, I'd agree. Back in college, I had a guy set up a whole big Valentine's surprise for me - he bought me chocolates, made reservations at a fancy restaurant, told me he'd been pining for me for months, and so forth. I felt like the worst person in the world for turning him down, but I couldn't possibly do anything else, because I simply wasn't interested in any relationship at the time (and, to be honest, even if I had wanted a relationship, it wouldn't have been with him). I was honestly pretty angry with him for putting me in a position where I was made to feel guilty for not wanting a boyfriend. Just like with love letters, sweeping a girl off her feet with a grand romantic gesture can be fantastic when the girl in question is either dating you or married to you, but it is an extremely bad idea otherwise.

exactly, turning people down sucks, especially when you're not really good in it/ don't really know what you want/ find it hard to communicate feelings/ the girl or boy in question is a good friend you don't want to loose/ etc.

Better idea:

Tell her that if she doesn't go out with her, you will abduct her parents.
I got that one from the Fairly Odd Parents.

Better idea:

Tell her that if she doesn't go out with her, you will abduct her parents.
I got that one from the Fairly Odd Parents.

If you ever want too see your parents again-

Why? Your mind will automatically run through the worst case scenarios? It's not really happening for me, i'm pretty sensible when it comes too foresight.

If I'm any indication, you will not be able to play through the encounter the way you imagined it.

Anyway, I'm certainly not the guy to ask for advice about this kinda topic, but if you can't just move on, ask her, and ask her FAST. First off - you may miss a chance. She may be single now, but not tomorrow. Or the day after that, if you go on putting it off.
Secondly, in my experience, if you do something and it doesn't work out (worst case being her laughing), you'll have a bad time for a short time. On middle terms, the experience will help you, though. However, if you DON'T do anything, you'll probably regret that for way longer... Even if you were to meet someone else a month later, having asked somebody out before will help you; not having done anything, on the other hand, means you'll be in the same situation as now...

*raises hand* So? I moved to Luxembourg, remember? I'm about six time zones off from three loose ends back in Michigan. You'll forgive yourself.

Yeah, I know I will. Thanks for the motivational speech, D. I'm definitely getting off the woe is me kick.

PS: Get on Gabbly, for Christ's sake.

Better idea:

Tell her that if she doesn't go out with her, you will abduct her parents.
I got that one from the Fairly Odd Parents.

(Yawns)

That's gonna be real helpful.

(Yawns)

That's gonna be real helpful.

*shrug* She could be a fan of cartoons...

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

So I drafted a letter, that explicitly states I am very attracted too her, and would love a chance too get too know her better. Dont get me wrong, in addition too being very pretty, shes quite intellient, and very polite.

So i'll probably slide it into her back pack on tueday...Is this a good idea?

As long as you don't imply oral sex. The last time I gave a girl a note that implied oral sex, she started being really friendly towards me... >.>

As long as you don't imply oral sex. The last time I gave a girl a note that implied oral sex, she started being really friendly towards me... >.>

1. Why would you write a note that implies or hints oral sex.

2. Why the hell would she become excited, reading some random note that implies oral sex (unless your a really good looking guy of course)

Better idea:

Tell her that if she doesn't go out with her, you will abduct her parents.
I got that one from the Fairly Odd Parents.

It would be just as legal and probably safer if you were to just rape her in public.

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

So I drafted a letter, that explicitly states I am very attracted too her, and would love a chance too get too know her better. Dont get me wrong, in addition too being very pretty, shes quite intellient, and very polite.

So i'll probably slide it into her back pack on tueday...Is this a good idea?
I don't know if love letters never work, but this sounds like a pretty pointless activity, especially considering that you're going to do it anonymously.

Also remember that actually asking her out will make you look more attractive.

Don't fear rejection. It's actually much better to know sooner than to have this uncertain feeling taking over your mind.

It would be just as legal and probably safer if you were to just rape her in public.

Nothing says "I love you" more than a brutal, humiliating sex crime. :p

Re the OP: Just go for it and tell her what you feel. It's better to know than to play games, especially if it ends up giving off a creepy vibe rather than a romantic one. An anonymous note could backfire in a lot of ways, whereas a direct shot is going to get you an unequivocal answer.

I mean, what happens if you give her the note and she thinks it's from someone else? Oops!

1. Why would you write a note that implies or hints oral sex.

It was an accident. Err... Really! I swear! I meant to imply something else.

2. Why the hell would she become excited, reading some random note that implies oral sex (unless your a really good looking guy of course)

Well, she was a teenager.

this has got to be the dumbest idea I ever heard. Not as dumb as some ideas I came up with as a teen, but definitely the dumbest I ever heard that I didn't make up. If you can't get her attention forget it. You'll just make a fool of yourself. Ask her for a picci, it will last longer and go farther than she will.

this has got to be the dumbest idea I ever heard. Not as dumb as some ideas I came up with as a teen, but definitely the dumbest I ever heard that I didn't make up. If you can't get her attention forget it. You'll just make a fool of yourself. Ask her for a picci, it will last longer and go farther than she will.

It works somewhat if you don't give it anonymously, and you're a very, very good writer.

It works somewhat if you don't give it anonymously, and you're a very, very good writer.

Well, I'm a damn good writer...the problem is, I'm only really good at writing nonfiction, analysis, and research papers. I can write beautiful treatises on the relationship between consumer expectations and inflation, but when it comes to anything approaching poetry, I'm rather useless.

It would sound like a love letter from Alan Greenspan...

Of course, that's exactly why I prefer to say things rather than write them.

It would be just as legal and probably safer if you were to just rape her in public.

Hencefourth, I will no longer be entertaining rape suggestions.

I did too. But, it's a fairly straightforward, indirect approach.
That's a contradiction. You're not thinking straight!!! How old are you anyway?

Thats a good point. Why start a relationship so indirectly, when in truth, a romantic relationship is the closest you can be too someone.
Listen to her; she's a wise old dragon. :)

Anyway, from what little info I have, it seems like the problem is you and her don't have any real personal connection. You like her, but she's "polite" to you. You're not even a friend. In all probability, you don't know her very well at all and she thinks of you as "that one guy." So proclamations of love at this point are only fooling yourself.

What you need to do is develop a real relationship with her. This is not the way to go about it. If you are too shy to talk with her now, you will also be too shy to talk to her after she's read (and laughed at :p) your letter. The only way you will get over this is by talking with her.
quoted for troof

..."Hey sugartits?" Erm, I SOMEHOW managed too refrain from such explicitives.
lol, I was once on the bus and I heard some guy talking on his mobile, addressing his partner with that phrase!

Well, I'm a damn good writer...the problem is, I'm only really good at writing nonfiction, analysis, and research papers. I can write beautiful treatises on the relationship between consumer expectations and inflation, but when it comes to anything approaching poetry, I'm rather useless.

It would sound like a love letter from Alan Greenspan...

Of course, that's exactly why I prefer to say things rather than write them.

Yeah. I gave a love note to one of my friends two months ago because I stutter randomly, and am not very good at talking. I think the note said it better than I could have, though she told me she doesn't like me in that way.

Yeah. I gave a love note to one of my friends two months ago because I stutter randomly, and am not very good at talking. I think the note said it better than I could have, though she told me she doesn't like me in that way.

Well, at least you went through with it. It's always better to know than to remain wracked by doubt.

last year, in high school - in front of everybody, this guy walks to a girl. you could see how nervous he was, sweat dripping from his forehead etc. he kneels in front of the girl and gets a rose from his pocket and probably asks if she wants to be his girlfriend, or whatever it is that people ask in that kind of situations.
you can imagine it was the talk of the day, and not really nice for the girl or the boy. i think he is still desperatly searching for a girlfriend. but one has to admire his courage.

Damn, that's bad.

I gave a card and a poinsetta flower to a girl once. I had to nick the damn thing from my dad. Guess what that came to. JACK SHIT.

It was an accident. Err... Really! I swear! I meant to imply something else.



Well, she was a teenager.

How can you accidently imply oral sex?

"Oh how beautiful your lips would look on my... Tootsie pop I just bought for you!"

As for being entertained by a sexually explicit letter, I can imagine a girl being more disgusted, and contacting the authorities, really.

That's a contradiction. You're not thinking straight!!! How old are you anyway?


Listen to her; she's a wise old dragon. :)


quoted for troof


lol, I was once on the bus and I heard some guy talking on his mobile, addressing his partner with that phrase!

What an interesting relationship they must garner, anywho...

Im not really contradicting myself, though it would seem that way. It easy, and straightforward, as in easy too do and understand, while the method im using is indirect and annonymous.

*shrug* She could be a fan of cartoons...

Kiddie cartoons? I doubt it. My older bro thinks they're funny, but he can be a little crazy. I only watch that shit when I'm bored out of my skull.

exactly, turning people down sucks, especially when the girl or boy in question is a good friend you don't want to loose
I've never understood this statement? How exactly do you lose a friend by initiating a romantic relationship with them?

Well, I'm a damn good writer...the problem is, I'm only really good at writing nonfiction, analysis, and research papers. I can write beautiful treatises on the relationship between consumer expectations and inflation, but when it comes to anything approaching poetry, I'm rather useless.

It would sound like a love letter from Alan Greenspan...

Of course, that's exactly why I prefer to say things rather than write them.

Or a romantic note as dictated by Brit Hume?

How can you accidently imply oral sex?

"Oh how beautiful your lips would look on my... Tootsie pop I just bought for you!"

As for being entertained by a sexually explicit letter, I can imagine a girl being more disgusted, and contacting the authorities, really.

I meant I implied that I would be willing to give her oral sex. And it was very ambigious like "The things I would be willing do to you are for me to know and you to find out" or something like that.

Or a romantic note as dictated by Brit Hume?

Pretty much. At least it wouldn't be in legalese...

I've never understood this statement? How exactly do you lose a friend by initiating a romantic relationship with them?

Trust me, if a good friend of mine suggested a relationship romantically, i'd be rather shocked, and distance myself. Certainly not too the point of severing communications, but nonetheless, it would be ever so akward...

It would be just as legal and probably safer if you were to just rape her in public.

Go join Kiryu and TMH. They suggested that to me once.

Well, at least you went through with it. It's always better to know than to remain wracked by doubt.

Yeah. But it's depressing 'cause I still am in love with her even though I have a girlfriend...

I meant I implied that I would be willing to give her oral sex. And it was very ambigious like "The things I would be willing do to you are for me to know and you to find out" or something like that.

If that was how you said it, the way you phrased that statement was not ambiguous at all.

If that was how you said it, the way you phrased that statement was not ambiguous at all.

Ohh. Well, at least it wasn't very specific..

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

So I drafted a letter, that explicitly states I am very attracted too her, and would love a chance too get too know her better. Dont get me wrong, in addition too being very pretty, shes quite intellient, and very polite.

So i'll probably slide it into her back pack on tueday...Is this a good idea?

Nah. She'd probably be scared of a stalker or something...

Nah. She'd probably be scared of a stalker or something...

A restraining order is the typical way to reply to a love letter.

Yeah. But it's depressing 'cause I still am in love with her even though I have a girlfriend...

Thats never good =/

I meant I implied that I would be willing to give her oral sex. And it was very ambigious like "The things I would be willing do to you are for me to know and you to find out" or something like that.


Ah, I can see the misconception now, though it still falls far short of a hint of oral sex in my opinion, as the interpertations can be fairly broad.

Thats never good =/

Yeah. And she's still one of my best friends too.

Pretty much. At least it wouldn't be in legalese...

That, and it probably wouldn't drone on into civil strife in Bangladesh, or rising inflation in Europe. =/

Yeah. And she's still one of my best friends too.

Well, theres your backup girlfriend, that is, if you ever need one.

Well, theres your backup girlfriend, that is, if you ever need one.

Well, the thing is she's still not attracted to me and I'm not really attracted to my girlfriend... I don't even know why I'm staying with my girlfriend other than because I don't want to hurt her...

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

So I drafted a letter, that explicitly states I am very attracted too her, and would love a chance too get too know her better. Dont get me wrong, in addition too being very pretty, shes quite intellient, and very polite.

So i'll probably slide it into her back pack on tueday...Is this a good idea?
The letter will work wonderfully...

...if you sign it.

Look, she'll like you more if she knows you desire her. Give her the letter (signed), and then back off and wait for her to come to you.

Well, the thing is she's still not attracted to me and I'm not really attracted to my girlfriend... I don't even know why I'm staying with my girlfriend other than because I don't want to hurt her...

Thats never a good reason for cultivating- more too the point keeping a relationship alive. =/

The letter will work wonderfully...

...if you sign it.

Look, she'll like you more if she knows you desire her. Give her the letter (signed), and then back off and wait for her to come to you.

Oh please...He'd look too desperate. He should find a friend of his who know him AND the girl and make the friend introduce them to eachother.

I think anonymous love letters are very romantic, as long as they don't end up being stalker-ish. But, then again, you'll want to make sure she's the right kind of girl for that sort of courting. Some girls aren't, and should be asked out right away. Maybe one letter, and then be bold, and tell her to her face? If she's at all worth it, she'll be flattered by your attention, even if it's not the right time for her to have a relationship with you (aka: she's drooling over the latest football quaterback).

They're good when you're in grammar school (lol).

Oh please...He'd look too desperate. He should find a friend of his who know him AND the girl and make the friend introduce them to eachother.

Hmmm...

Trust me, if a good friend of mine suggested a relationship romantically, i'd be rather shocked, and distance myself. Certainly not too the point of severing communications, but nonetheless, it would be ever so akward...
I have rejected and been rejected by friends and this has never happened. It's only awkward if you (at some level) want it to be.

I have rejected and been rejected by friends and this has never happened. It's only awkward if you (at some level) want it to be.

Or perhaps you REALLY just didnt see it coming?

Thats never a good reason for cultivating- more too the point keeping a relationship alive. =/

Well, I never was very good with relationships. Which is kinda depressing because she's the first girl I've ever kissed, much less the first girl I kissed and never was quite attracted to. I think she's in love with me though...

Well, I never was very good with relationships. Which is kinda depressing because she's the first girl I've ever kissed, much less the first girl I kissed and never was quite attracted to. I think she's in love with me though...

At the risk of coming off as a perverse internet rapist, your story is fairly interesting. Add me on MSN messanger.

Having a friend ask her out for you is probably a good idea. I had a friend of mine do that for me once; she said no, but we've remained good friends ever since. I think that, if you ask her out through a third party, you're less likely to suffer any bad repercussions if she rejects your offer, wheras if you ask her out directly she may feel embarrassed, intimidated, confused etc., and your friendship may decline because of it.

Having a friend ask her out for you is probably a good idea. I had a friend of mine do that for me once; she said no, but we've remained good friends ever since. I think that, if you ask her out through a third party, you're less likely to suffer any bad repercussions if she rejects your offer, wheras if you ask her out directly she may feel embarrassed, intimidated, confused etc., and your friendship may decline because of it.

True.

If you want to scare her, send her that anonymous letter. I never got one, but I know someone who did, she decided she had a stalker and gave it to the police.

If you want to scare her, send her that anonymous letter. I never got one, but I know someone who did, she decided she had a stalker and gave it to the police.

Erm...I take it the letter was explicit in one way or another....Or the writer was similar too the guy in my sig...

Erm...I take it the letter was explicit in one way or another....Or the writer was similar too the guy in my sig...

It was the anonymous part that did it. She figured that anyone who wouldn't sign his name to a letter was either kinky or had something to hide.

It was the anonymous part that did it. She figured that anyone who wouldn't sign his name to a letter was either kinky or had something to hide.

ah, right o.

I've never understood this statement? How exactly do you lose a friend by initiating a romantic relationship with them?

i don't really know exactly. but we used to talk a lot and do stuff together, like most friends do i guess. but now we don't do that stuff anymore, it's been months since i talked to her.

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

So I drafted a letter, that explicitly states I am very attracted too her, and would love a chance too get too know her better. Dont get me wrong, in addition too being very pretty, shes quite intellient, and very polite.

So i'll probably slide it into her back pack on tueday...Is this a good idea?

I'd say go for it, but at least not anonymously.

Lets see, the paper....plus the ink I printed on the paper....Ok So I would've spent 6 cents on her. Can you refer me too a hooker in my price range perhaps?

There's your love letter, right there. Insert her name in place of "her" and you're in.

There's your love letter, right there. Insert her name in place of "her" and you're in.

Alright mate. ;)

I talked this over with my daughter. Her take on it is this: girls like confidence (not arrogance) and courage. An anonymous letter indicates a lack of confidence and courage. The best reaction you would get from her is that she'll toss the letter because she would feel that you are too timid. The worst reaction you'll get is that she'll turn the letter over to the police. Anonymous letters are not a good move.

I talked this over with my daughter. Her take on it is this: girls like confidence (not arrogance) and courage. An anonymous letter indicates a lack of confidence and courage. The best reaction you would get from her is that she'll toss the letter because she would feel that you are too timid. The worst reaction you'll get is that she'll turn the letter over to the police. Anonymous letters are not a good move.

So true....Wait you have a daughter? ...Sorry, out of my age group really =/

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

So I drafted a letter, that explicitly states I am very attracted too her, and would love a chance too get too know her better. Dont get me wrong, in addition too being very pretty, shes quite intellient, and very polite.

So i'll probably slide it into her back pack on tueday...Is this a good idea?
Bad idea.
I'll tell you why.
Write a letter bury it in an old Indian burial ground wait 2 weeks and she will ask you out!

That always works.

Bad idea.
I'll tell you why.
Write a letter bury it in an old Indian burial ground wait 2 weeks and she will ask you out!

That always works.

Or possibly and anguished Native spirit will eat my flesh? Meh its worth a shot. *Gets shovel*

For NA, and any of you who's experience I know just too well.

*The Patent-Pending Chellian Method of Getting with Girls*

Getting with a girl isn't hard. There are multiple ways to go about it. There's the fast way, there's the moderate way, and there's the near-guaranteed way. We will be discussing the Near-Guarenteed way today, boys and girls.

First off, try to hang out with the same people that the girl you want to get with does. The best way of doing this is to become friends with a guy that hangs out with her a lot(preferably in a decently sized group, but it works either way).

Show more interest in other people in the group. Not relationship wise, but just show more interest in them in general. Talk around her, not to her.

This may take a while. It helps if you seem confident in general. Also, if she talks to you, talk back, but don't try to start conversations. Let her push for conversations. She'll want them simply because you're around her, but not giving it to her.

She'll begin to become interested in you, and not even realize it. Because you're right in her face, yet not showing interest in her. She wants what isn't being given to her. When you don't jump on an occasion to talk to her, she'll feel even a stronger wish to get to know you, talk to you, etc.

Slowly give her rope. Talk to her more when she starts conversations. Maybe go somewhere with her, if you have a legitimate reason to go(Both want to get something to eat, etc).

She'll want you, pretty bad, after long enough. This is the longest method, but the most sure-fire one. Its never failed for me. Now, this is just for starting. You're on your own keeping them. I suck at that part.

Of course, you can do the quick and dirty. You start the same way as the guarenteed one. But when they start to try to get you to pay attention to them, you do it. Then you have a rapport with them. Soon after, you try to get them to hang out with you. It can be as easy as walking home with them(at least live in the same general direction, don't have to backtrack to school to actually get home). Find some way to hang out with them, alone, even if its not for too long.

Then, kiss them. Not while you're in the middle of walking, or talking. Either get her to stop for a second, to talk to her real quick, or find some pause in whatever you're doing. Then kiss them. This has also never failed for me, and I've done it more than the long method. Don't seem nervous when doing it, either. You want them to think you're really confident. To relate a small story...

I did the above method on a girl who I wasn't really interested in at first, but while trying to pursue someone else, she started vying for my attention. So, I gave her attention. Then we started hanging out at school, and soon after, I noticed she walked home, the same way I get home(though I was getting rides home at that point). So, one day, I told her I didn't have a ride, and we walked home together.

Well, we stopped real quick at the park, because we both smoked, and didn't want to smoke on the sidewalk of a fairly popular street. Anyways, I scooted up close to her on a bench we were both on. I had my hand resting on the bench table behind her, then I moved it up and started playing with her neck. Girls love shit like that(though it helped I was flirting alot, though descreetly, before we got there). I could tell she liked it too, but she asked "Why are you playing with my neck?"(not in a creeped out way, but just sort of inquisitive). I told her "Because I know you like it". She asked "How do you know that?". So I replied "Because I know you'll like this", and I started making out with her.

This was my first time ever kissing a girl, mind you. But I seemed confident as hell, and got her attracted. We were making out the whole way home.

Of course, she was obsessed with her ex-boyfriend, and promptly ended things. But alas, that was out of my control. I got better results than the majority of others who went after her.

Anyways, that was a pretty long winded lesson... We'll reconvene on monday, children.

So i've had this rather large crush on this girl in my english class for awhile now. I've tried striking up conversation, but im given a polite response, and she goes back too what shes been doing.

So I drafted a letter, that explicitly states I am very attracted too her, and would love a chance too get too know her better. Dont get me wrong, in addition too being very pretty, shes quite intellient, and very polite.

So i'll probably slide it into her back pack on tueday...Is this a good idea?

I find that talking to her directly is a better approach than writing love letters. Bonus points if you can say what you have to say with wit. At least in the 21st century United States. If you live in Victorian England or a modern-day country that has a set of elaborate courting rituals (i.e. The Philippines), then your plan will be more effective. Really, if you can just get over your shyness and talk to her candidly about your feelings in a private, love-conducive atmosphere, you will usually come out ahead.

However, if you are dead set in doing what you have originally intended, just know that it is possible, but rare. A friend of mine has done what you are contemplating and he succeeded. A love letter can work for you, but it depends on how comfortable the two of you are with each other. The letter ought to be signed and personally delivered to her. If you can do so, deliver the letter to her when the two of you are alone. That will eliminate peer influences and allow both of you to concentrate on the moment.

I find that talking to her directly is a better approach than writing love letters. Bonus points if you can say what you have to say with wit. At least in the 21st century United States. If you live in Victorian England or a modern-day country that has a set of elaborate courting rituals (i.e. The Philippines), then your plan will be more effective. Really, if you can just get over your shyness and talk to her candidly about your feelings in a private, love-conducive atmosphere, you will usually come out ahead.

However, if you are dead set in doing what you have originally intended, just know that it is possible, but rare. A friend of mine has done what you are contemplating and he succeeded. A love letter can work for you, but it depends on how comfortable the two of you are with each other. The letter ought to be signed and personally delivered to her. If you can do so, deliver the letter to her when the two of you are alone. That will eliminate peer influences and allow both of you to concentrate on the moment.

Whatever you do, don't tell her "your feelings for her". Makes you sound like a loser. If you aren't confident enough to just make a move, try to get her to hang out with you. Tell her you want alone time with her. Tell her you want to go out with her some time.

Anything but going on about how much you like them, and want to be with them, etc. It sounds pathetic.

Whatever you do, don't tell her "your feelings for her". Makes you sound like a loser. If you aren't confident enough to just make a move, try to get her to hang out with you. Tell her you want alone time with her. Tell her you want to go out with her some time.

Anything but going on about how much you like them, and want to be with them, etc. It sounds pathetic.

Your techniques work if Ausha wants the girl for a quickie. The way I see it, Ausha loves the girl big time. If you love someone and you want to know if they feel the same for you, you ought to be direct about it. It saves time for all parties involved.

Your techniques work if Ausha wants the girl for a quickie. The way I see it, Ausha loves the girl big time. If you love someone and you want to know if they feel the same for you, you ought to be direct about it. It saves time for all parties involved.

Saves time by getting rejected.

Really though, you won't get with a girl if they don't get a chance to find out they like you. Telling them all your deep feelings is going to turn them away.

They almost never will feel the same way you do about them, at that point, unless things have slowly been growing between you for a while. You know, the classic way.

Every piece of advice I've given NA has been how to start something with a girl. That can be expanded into a quickie, or a relationship, or something inbetween. Thats all in what you do after what I've suggested.

Love letters never work, sky-writing however......

Saves time by getting rejected.

Really though, you won't get with a girl if they don't get a chance to find out they like you. Telling them all your deep feelings is going to turn them away.

They almost never will feel the same way you do about them, at that point, unless things have slowly been growing between you for a while. You know, the classic way.

Every piece of advice I've given NA has been how to start something with a girl. That can be expanded into a quickie, or a relationship, or something inbetween. Thats all in what you do after what I've suggested.

I figure that NA and the little lady had plenty of class time to find out if they dig each other. All that NA has to do is break the ice with her by asking if she would like to go out with him and find out more about each other. I do not see the need for him to spend his time being her friend only to find out from her that some other guy has gotten together with her.

My advice (applies to pretty much every case of someone seeking a relationship) would be as follows:

Give it up. Crush that silly illusion of having found 'someone important'. The relationship very, very likely, as is the case with most ones, wouldn't last anyway, should you manage to succeed, and is pretty much bound to blow up in your face sooner or later. It'd, in the end, just be a useless waste of time and resources. You might just as well do something productive instead, something that benefits you in one way or another without coming at any significant cost or involving any significant risk.

For example: Play a game, dork around on the internet, or create something of value. There are many meaningful activities to spend your time by yourself with.

Bad idea.
I'll tell you why.
Write a letter bury it in an old Indian burial ground wait 2 weeks and she will ask you out!

That always works.

Not always, but more often than sending the letter :D

Give it up. Crush that silly illusion of having found 'someone important'. The relationship very, very likely, as is the case with most ones, wouldn't last anyway, should you manage to succeed, and is pretty much bound to blow up in your face sooner or later. It'd, in the end, just be a useless waste of time and resources. You might just as well do something productive instead, something that benefits you in one way or another without coming at any significant cost or involving any significant risk.

i used to think the same, why bother with all those relations when you can have the same amounts of fun when you're alone and when you don't have to take someone else in account you are much more free to do what ever you want.

but nowadays i'm wondering: what if i'm wrong and all those other people are right? (i know there is little chance but you can't know that unless you try ;))

You have Onegina. Save face, befriend her and make her feel like she has to earn her friendship with you, tell her lets just be friends, ironically she should find you very attractive and hump you there and then. Don't take me literally, but something along those lines. Oh don't forget to take the p**s out of her, in a non malicious way. Watch the 'Tao of Steve'.

Yeah, NA, don't focus too much on one girl. That really doesn't work well, until you're actually, you know, going out.

The best relationships are the ones that happen by chance. For instance, I was waiting for the bus today near my college, because I'm still trying to figure out my schedule, etc. Anyways, I'm smoking, and this cute asian girl comes and asks if she can borrow my lighter. I let her, she starts talking to be about how their going to stop letting people smoke in the quad, etc.

Anyways, we're talking, and its fun. Her bus gets there, and she asks me if I want to hang out sometime, and we exchanged numbers. I'm not really confident enough to walk up to girls and try to flirt with them, but I'm pretty good at doing it once the ice is broken. If I had tried to start a conversation with her, I would have been nervous, and I probably wouldn't have come off as I did.

She came up to me though, so I felt more confident, and also at ease because I wasn't trying to achieve anything, I was just having a good time talking with a cute girl. My point is, don't try so hard. Girls don't want a guy that pursue's them, contrary to common thought. They just want guys to pursue them. They want the guys that they have to pursue.

For instance, I was waiting for the bus today near my college, because I'm still trying to figure out my schedule, etc. Anyways, I'm smoking, and this cute asian girl comes and asks if she can borrow my lighter. I let her, she starts talking to be about how their going to stop letting people smoke in the quad, etc.

Anyways, we're talking, and its fun. Her bus gets there, and she asks me if I want to hang out sometime, and we exchanged numbers.

She's probably a prostitute, a drag queen, a shemale, a slut, or involved in an exclusive relationship.

Or all of them at once.

She's probably a prostitute, a drag queen, a shemale, a slut, or involved in an exclusive relationship.

Or all of them at once.

Anyone who's that skilled at multitasking...

lol Chellis... You never learn, do you? :p
-snip-
^ Agreed.

She's probably a prostitute, a drag queen, a shemale, a slut, or involved in an exclusive relationship.

Or all of them at once.

Yeah, but she's asian. That makes up for all of those at once.