NationStates Jolt Archive

There is a theme park in Orlando Florida called Holy Land Experience. They put on a live crucifiction show daily, they have a museum where you can look at old scrolls, and you can chow down on authentic middle eastern food, like a Goliathburger. So what do you think? Will this new holy land conveniently located far away from Katyusha rockets take tourists away from Israel?

http://www.holylandexperience.com/

Isn't the term "Biblical Archaeologist" a bit of an oxymoron?

Isn't the term "Biblical Archaeologist" a bit of an oxymoron?

Not at all. You could dig up the sites of all those cities that are mentioned in the bible, like Jericho and stuff.

Not at all. You could dig up the sites of all those cities that are mentioned in the bible, like Jericho and stuff.

Yeah but that's just archeology, nothing biblical about it other than an arbitrary place name.

I visited the Very Large Array (http://www.vla.nrao.edu/) in New Mexico, once. It was a personal Holy Land Experience for me :)

I visited the Very Large Array (http://www.vla.nrao.edu/) in New Mexico, once. It was a personal Holy Land Experience for me :)

Yeah? Well can you get authentic middle eastern foods like a Goliathburger, Milk and Honey ice cream, or a Bedouin beef wrap at the Very Large Array?

why is Jesus white? :confused:

oh, and no, I don't think it will change much in Israel, my church has a group that goes on a trip every year to Jerusalem, they went last year, they went this year, they will go next year.........I would go too, but if I am going to spend $3k on a vacation I think I will opt for Disney World.

I'll have the Goliathburger with a side of Inquisition Fries and a Reformation shake to go, please. Oh, and Saviour-size the fries, willya? I'm late for the 12:30 Annunciation...

why is Jesus white? :confused:

oh, and no, I don't think it will change much in Israel, my church has a group that goes on a trip every year to Jerusalem, they went last year, they went this year, they will go next year.........I would go too, but if I am going to spend $3k on a vacation I think I will opt for Disney World.

Well it's in Orlando. You could hit the Holy Land park as well as Disney.

What kind of Holy Land doesn't have Katyusha rockets? That's blasphemy I tells ya.

Well it's in Orlando. You could hit the Holy Land park as well as Disney.

I don't think so. ;)

I want to go there.

There is a theme park in Orlando Florida called Holy Land Experience. They put on a live crucifiction show daily, they have a museum where you can look at old scrolls, and you can chow down on authentic middle eastern food, like a Goliathburger. So what do you think? Will this new holy land conveniently located far away from Katyusha rockets take tourists away from Israel?

http://www.holylandexperience.com/

These people must know that this is blasphemy. If not, then it's also irony.

What kind of Holy Land doesn't have Katyusha rockets? That's blasphemy I tells ya.

Hey, want to design a Modern Holy Land Experience? We could have random rocket attacks, exploding busses that take you to various points of interest in the park, a food court with suicide bombers, Palestineland (where you dodge bulldozers and throw rocks at Israeli tanks to win prizes), and all kinds of other fun stuff.

So, what makes this place Holy? Has the Pope blessed it? Did Mary appear in the Goliathburger? Maybe Jesus was seen in a brick?

I want to go there.

I kinda do too.

Yeah? Well can you get authentic middle eastern foods like a Goliathburger, Milk and Honey ice cream, or a Bedouin beef wrap at the Very Large Array?

Well, no. But the gift shop has some cool teeshirts . . .

Well, no. But the gift shop has some cool teeshirts . . .

I went to a "fun" brainwashing center and all I got was this lousy T-shirt and eternal salvation.

:D

Also coming to Florida

City of Revelation
Central Florida
Opening date TBA
Giant biblical theme park with attractions "from Genesis to Revelation"
- Ezekiel's "chariot of fire" ride
- "See an authentic Jewish wedding"
- Re-creation of destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah
Where are they going to find enough unmarried Jewish couples to do a daily "authentic" Jewish wedding? You would think that sooner or later they'll run out.

I went to a "fun" brainwashing center and all I got was this lousy T-shirt and eternal salvation.

:D

LOL!

why is Jesus white? :confused:


Because he was english.

Because he was english.

We all know that it's a big conspiracy fronted by the Bush Admin! If they acknowledge that Jesus was Arab (brown people) then they lose all reasons to tell people to be afraid of the brown people!

This is pretty much everything that's wrong with modern religion in a nutshell.

This is pretty much everything that's wrong with modern religion in a nutshell.

What, I think the mouse ears look rather fetching on Mary Magdelene.

What's next? Live reenactments of Sodom and Gomorrah's destruction?

Also coming to Florida

Where are they going to find enough unmarried Jewish couples to do a daily "authentic" Jewish wedding? You would think that sooner or later they'll run out.

Uh, this is Florida, remember?

This is pretty much everything that's wrong with modern religion in a nutshell.

Relax. It's just an amusement park. It's kind of christian-kitschy, but it's not abortion clinic bombing school or something.

Uh, this is Florida, remember?

I get it. They cruise the old age homes to find an old Jewish couple with Alzheimers and convince them that each wedding is their very first one.

What's next? Live reenactments of Sodom and Gomorrah's destruction?

Yeah, actually that's planned for a new bible theme park that is currently looking for investors.

Yeah, actually that's planned for a new bible theme park that is currently looking for investors.

Jesus H. Christ... >_<

All right, what about... Garden of Eden?

Jesus H. Christ... >_<

All right, what about... Garden of Eden?

Yep. It will be in the planned theme park along with a Noah's ark ride and an Ezekiel's Chariot ride.

Yep. It will be in the planned theme park along with a Noah's ark ride and an Ezekiel's Chariot ride.

No surprise here. OK, Book of Revelations?

Gimme a couple of hours at the Limbo Spa to shake off the night spent at the Communion Wine Bar... I could use some time in stasis...

No surprise here. OK, Book of Revelations?

I don't know, but it is going to be called "City of Revelation", so I guess that's not out of the question.

Relax. It's just an amusement park. It's kind of christian-kitschy, but it's not abortion clinic bombing school or something.

Granted it's not as bad as suicide bombers or the like, but frankly I find it a little disgusting and completely antithetical to the teachings of Jesus to charge people 35 bucks a pop to go to the Jesusland theme park when they could, say, go to church if they want to celebrate Jesus and maybe donate that 35 bucks to charity? That seems like it would be a fairly Christian thing to do. I'm sure someone is making big bucks off of the faithful at this theme park, just like Pastor Ted and Jimmy Swaggart and those types do.

The hypocrisy of religion is what drove me from it.

Bah, next thing you know they'll have people in gigantic Adam/Abraham/Moses/David/Solomon/Jesus suits having their pictures taken with people.

http://mirrorimageorigin.collegepublisher.com/media/paper654/stills/3unf0c26.jpg

Yeah but that's just archeology, nothing biblical about it other than an arbitrary place name.

You could dig up bibles there.

http://mirrorimageorigin.collegepublisher.com/media/paper654/stills/3unf0c26.jpg

Exactly.

Jesus God, sometimes I'm embarassed to be an American.

http://mirrorimageorigin.collegepublisher.com/media/paper654/stills/3unf0c26.jpg

Rod Flanders: Are you jealous of Brother Homer?
Ned Flanders: Maybe just a little bit.
Rod Flanders: I'm jealous of girls 'cause they get to wear dresses.
Ned Flanders: One problem at a time, boy.

There is a theme park in Orlando Florida called Holy Land Experience. They put on a live crucifiction show daily
This is a disgrace, and should be boycotted by everybody.

Oh, we've all got to go to this City of Revelations theme park when it opens. We can have an NS hookup there and become the atheist invasion. :D

There is a theme park in Orlando Florida called Holy Land Experience. They put on a live crucifiction show daily, they have a museum where you can look at old scrolls, and you can chow down on authentic middle eastern food, like a Goliathburger. So what do you think? Will this new holy land conveniently located far away from Katyusha rockets take tourists away from Israel?

http://www.holylandexperience.com/

I thought the Holy Land Experience was living in a hut on a small, crummy patch of desert and then getting kicked out by other people, then trying to kick them out and reclaim it, repeated over and over again until you either die of thirst or Pope Urban II and his army kill you both, burn your hut down, and take the land.

Because he was english.

Cockney, too be exact on the accent. "Right ho, that bloody judas, damn 'im to hell!"

Jesus H. Christ... >_<

All right, what about... Garden of Eden?Before the fall.
Off with the figs leaves, everyone.

Could be the best part of the park.

So, what makes this place Holy? Has the Pope blessed it? Did Mary appear in the Goliathburger? Maybe Jesus was seen in a brick?

I once sneezed at it. Does that help?

These people must know that this is blasphemy. If not, then it's also irony.
While we are on the subject of blasphemy I found a very interesting website (http://www.blasphemychallenge.com/) today while on another forum.
You too can get a free DVD for damning yourself to an eternity in Hell!
What a bargain ;)

While we are on the subject of blasphemy I found a very interesting website (http://www.blasphemychallenge.com/) today while on another forum.
You too can get a free DVD for damning yourself to an eternity in Hell!
What a bargain ;)

Do they deliver overseas?

Edit: "*Sorry, no free shipping outside the United States on DVDs. But international blasphemers will receive $35 worth of Rational Response Squad radio show downloads instead, or you can opt to pay the $8 shipping and handling for the DVD."

Oh. Bummer.