NationStates Jolt Archive

A Long Island man was recently rescued from under a pile of bags filled with his feces and jars filled with his urine. He'd been trapped for four days. Now a lot of people have odd collections. Serial killer memorabilia, bones and body parts, clothing from your victims, whatever. This collection is the worst. He not only collected feces and urine, but he only collected his own. Not only is it a smelly and uninteresting collection, but it even lacks variety.

http://www.nypost.com/seven/12102006/news/regionalnews/man_trapped_4_days_regionalnews_frank_ryan.htm

I wanna know what the "other debris" was.

...

...on second thought, maybe I don't.

Well, considering he'd been collecting them, maybe it wasn't such an ordeal for him to be trapped under them all.
He might have enjoyed it.

I feel sorry for the poor sods who had to wade in and rescue him.

And the ones down at the hospital.

Stories like this make me glad I never became a medic and/or rescue person.

ewwww....

"...check up on the 64-year-old veteran who hadn't been seen in days"

Best anti-war campaign ever!

JOIN THE ARMY AND END UP COVERED IN BAGS OF YOUR OWN FECES!

This collection is the worst. He not only collected feces and urine, but he only collected his own. Not only is it a smelly and uninteresting collection, but it even lacks variety.
Well...maybe not.
Maybe he had them catelogued according to what he had eaten a day earlier.
That way he could see what went in and what came out.

(thinks about this)

Nope.

still ewwwwww....


I tried to put a postive spin on this, but failed. Anyone else want to have a go?

MAN TRAPPED 4 DAYS
Heh. Pun. Heh, heh.

Why would you need 'heavy rescue equipment' to get someone out from under a pile of bags and jars? :confused:

I wonder how much his collection is worth?

Well...maybe not.
Maybe he had them catelogued according to what he had eaten a day earlier.
That way he could see what went in and what came out.

(thinks about this)

Nope.

still ewwwwww....


I tried to put a postive spin on this, but failed. Anyone else want to have a go?

Perhaps he was......nevermind. I can't do it either. :(

Well...maybe not.
Maybe he had them catelogued according to what he had eaten a day earlier.
That way he could see what went in and what came out.

(thinks about this)
I dunno, that'd be quite interesting...

What? It would be. Only if it were your own shit, though, I can't imagine it'd be very nice to examine someone else's.

Well...maybe not.
Maybe he had them catelogued according to what he had eaten a day earlier.
That way he could see what went in and what came out.

(thinks about this)

Nope.

still ewwwwww....


I tried to put a postive spin on this, but failed. Anyone else want to have a go?

*spins room rapidly*
*looks*
Nope, that didn't help in the slightest :(

A Long Island man was recently rescued from under a pile of bags filled with his feces and jars filled with his urine. He'd been trapped for four days. Now a lot of people have odd collections. Serial killer memorabilia, bones and body parts, clothing from your victims, whatever. This collection is the worst. He not only collected feces and urine, but he only collected his own. Not only is it a smelly and uninteresting collection, but it even lacks variety.

http://www.nypost.com/seven/12102006/news/regionalnews/man_trapped_4_days_regionalnews_frank_ryan.htm

As a member and acting president of the AFUCA, the American feces and urine collectors association, I resent your classifying our vast collections as "smelly and uninteresting", and worse yet lacking in variety! By consuming massive ammounts of beats, food colorings, pepto bismo, and dark green vegetables we at the AFUCA have been able to produce a myriad of collectable in all different sizes, colors, textures, and odors. Feces and urine collecting is not some idle pass time, it is an art! Much akin to wine making. I believe a formal apology is in order.

[QUOTE=Neesika;12073358]"...check up on the 64-year-old veteran who hadn't been seen in days"

QUOTE]

Is this where Eut went??

I wonder if his collection was insured?

Did he have the jars of urine labeled?

I wonder if he'll offer any advice for budding collectors?

I didnt know you could stack shit that high.

He must have been really pissed after they rescued him.

You know those firemen and EMTS have no respect for your shit.

Heh. Pun. Heh, heh.

Why would you need 'heavy rescue equipment' to get someone out from under a pile of bags and jars? :confused:

maybe he'd been shitting bricks?

A police Sgt on the scence was interviewed and said it was good this victim kept his jars of semen and zip lock bags of boogers in a safer location.

I didnt know you could stack shit that high.

Nice. FMJ quote FTW.

Nice. FMJ quote FTW.

your name sounds like royalty....

wait til they discover this guy has bales of pubic hair and barrels of dingleberries in his shed.

A man's home is his castle,though. He can collect that stuff until he is buried in it.