NationStates Jolt Archive

It seems some guys who are dissatisfied with the size of their hogs have decided that injecting them with vasoline or industrial lubricants will plump them up. Turns out that it causes ulceration of the skin and necrosis of the tissues. Who would have thought that injecting industrial lubricants into your mule was a bad idea?


http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/2006042.stm

couldn’t you just put a giant rubber penis over the top?

Well, actually, there is a thing called "sounding" and, well, during which the lube is supposed to go into the urethra... *shall not elaborate further, because it scares him to even talk about it*

I think if you are that stupid and superficial, you probably deserve for your penis to die.

;)

Well, actually, there is a thing called "sounding" and, well, during which the lube is supposed to go into the urethra... *shall not elaborate further, because it scares him to even talk about it*

how did you find this out :p

how did you find this out :p

Let's just say I've been a few times around the block and seen things up close one should never see or assist in, and leave it at that, shall we?

Let's just say I've been a few times around the block and seen things up close one should never see or assist in, and leave it at that, shall we?

what did it sound like? :D

what did it sound like? :D

It doesn't make all that much sound, a fleeting "splodge" here or there at the most.

they should just tie a rock to it

This is one thread I really wish I hadn't read. DCD, you have once again excelled yourself. You too Fassigen, but for entirely different reasons...

This is one thread I really wish I hadn't read. DCD, you have once again excelled yourself. You too Fassigen, but for entirely different reasons...

Just in case you want to learn more about what Fass was talking about

George is one of our 'unstable' inmates, and among other things, he enjoys sticking things into his penis. As with the other guys who are into penile penetration, I call George a 'pipe-fitter'. He'll put anything in there. Pens, batteries, fingers, it doesn't matter. I guess he gets some form of sexual gratification from it. Or maybe he just likes pissing us off. Either way, he shouldn't have had a razor in his cell in the first place. http://www.fireontheline.com/

Just in case you want to learn more about what Fass was talking about

http://www.fireontheline.com/

*goes to cry*

I think if you are that stupid and superficial, you probably deserve for your penis to die.

;)

Agreed.

Just in case you want to learn more about what Fass was talking about

http://www.fireontheline.com/

This post makes my penis very sad. :(

Ouch I'm feeling pain and I don't even have a penis. Poor George...

Hmm... I wonder why this trend started in Asia? Gangrene? Ugh..

Seriously, why do some men find penis size so important? It's not even like you walk around with them on display (well, most men don't...). Now breasts; there's something you notice the presence or lack of...

Ouch I'm feeling pain and I don't even have a penis. Poor George...

Hmm... I wonder why this trend started in Asia? Gangrene? Ugh..

Seriously, why do some men find penis size so important? It's not even like you walk around with them on display (well, most men don't...). Now breasts; there's something you notice the presence or lack of...

Guys with big dicks are just compensating for having crappy slow cars.



Wait, something seems off about that sentence.

Just in case you want to learn more about what Fass was talking about

http://www.fireontheline.com/

My imagination is burning. :(

BUMP for those who missed this one.

Wow, for some reason I keep thinking of that gif from discharges.org...

Fucked Up Beyond All Recognition.:eek:

enjoys sticking things into his...I guess he gets some form of sexual gratification from it...he shouldn't have had a razor in his cell in the first place.

Just the thought of that makes me hurt, really hurt. looks in pants...oh shit...it hid..:eek:

It seems some guys who are dissatisfied with the size of their hogs have decided that injecting them with vasoline or industrial lubricants will plump them up. Turns out that it causes ulceration of the skin and necrosis of the tissues. Who would have thought that injecting industrial lubricants into your mule was a bad idea?


http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/2006042.stm

If people weren't set on engaging in sort of sexual perversion and deviancy we wouldn't have this problem.

If people weren't set on engaging in sort of sexual perversion and deviancy we wouldn't have this problem.

Indeed. Could you imagine a world like that?

It's horrific!

Tis unfortunate that we must be so insecure and resort to such deadly tactics. Like, you have one freaking penis. You make one mistake and then -BAM!- your dick is dead. Sad, indeed.

Tis unfortunate that we must be so insecure and resort to such deadly tactics. Like, you have one freaking penis. You make one mistake and then -BAM!- your dick is dead. Sad, indeed.

I am comfortable with my "average size manhood" and my sexual partners and I have always been satisfied.

We have never felt the necessity to invite Bob http://www.enzyte.com/images/home_hl.gif into our life.

I am comfortable with my "average size manhood" and my sexual partners and I have always been satisfied.

We have never felt the necessity to invite Bob http://www.enzyte.com/images/home_hl.gif into our life.

I love those commercials.

Owowowowowow...

I am comfortable with my "average size manhood" and my sexual partners and I have always been satisfied.

We have never felt the necessity to invite Bob http://www.enzyte.com/images/home_hl.gif into our life.

is it just me or does "Bob" look constipated?

Owowowowowow...



is it just me or does "Bob" look constipated?

Maybe that's one of the side effects of "natural male enhancement".

is it just me or does "Bob" look constipated?

Mmm...no, I think he just has a pickle stuck up somewhere. :p

Owowowowowow...



is it just me or does "Bob" look constipated?

Side effects.....

It seems some guys who are dissatisfied with the size of their hogs have decided that injecting them with vasoline or industrial lubricants will plump them up. Turns out that it causes ulceration of the skin and necrosis of the tissues. Who would have thought that injecting industrial lubricants into your mule was a bad idea?


http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/2006042.stm
This thread is too hard on me. :eek:

Maybe that's one of the side effects of "natural male enhancement". I GET IT... the skin is so stretched that it eventually pulls his mouth into that ebil grin... I guess it's like a non surgical face lift.

This thread is too hard on me. :eek:LOL...

that is if you were joking... :eek:

LOL...

that is if you were joking... :eek:
I was. :D

I have never in my life been so happy to have a vagina

I have never in my life been so happy to have a vagina

Agreed... I am also happy with the knowledge that you have a Vagina! :D

Well, actually, there is a thing called "sounding" and, well, during which the lube is supposed to go into the urethra... *shall not elaborate further, because it scares him to even talk about it*

No - sounding is like a long, rounded, one-pronged tuning fork entering the urethra. The sound (long metal wand) is bent slightly at the end in order to reach the bladder. Surgical lube is used to make the sound slide easily.

I'm not sure if this is used as a tuning fork afterwards (hit with a small hammer)

Some time, when you're not too scared, look up some medical sex toys websites.

There are whole sections dedicated to surgical sounds.

There's only one thing that need be said about this topic...


EWWWW!!! :(

I think if you are that stupid and superficial, you probably deserve for your penis to die.

Your penis will burn in hell!

Your penis will burn in hell!

LOL!!!

psst... Smunkee's a she. ;)

No - sounding is like a long, rounded, one-pronged tuning fork entering the urethra. The sound (long metal wand) is bent slightly at the end in order to reach the bladder. Surgical lube is used to make the sound slide easily.

How does this contradict anything I said? I mean, why start the sentence with a "no?" Because I don't see how what I said is different from what you just said, except that I didn't go into details, on purpose.

Some time, when you're not too scared, look up some medical sex toys websites. There are whole sections dedicated to surgical sounds.

Umm, I work in medicine and I'm a fag. I've seen things a lot worse. "Scared" was more a sarcastic allusion to moderation action should I go on to describe the intricacies of sounding.

I have never in my life been so happy to have a vagina

Consider yourself lucky.

"Scared" was more a sarcastic allusion to moderation action should I go on to describe the intricacies of sounding.

I love how intellectual he sounds when talking about shoving lubes up a penis.

I have never in my life been so happy to have a vagina
Agreed, as long as nobody tries to stick foreign objects up there...:S

I have never in my life been so happy to have a vagina

You said it sister! And yet so many males bring up the topic of penis envy... Personally I'd rather have freedom between my legs!

Agreed, as long as nobody tries to stick foreign objects up there...:S

:eek:


Someone was bound to say it.

You said it sister! And yet so many males bring up the topic of penis envy... Personally I'd rather have freedom between my legs!
I know. I can't imagine having something there. It's be so awkward to move around or sit with one leg on top of another. It'd be like you sacking yourself repeatedly! :eek:
:eek:


Someone was bound to say it.
I meant things like pens and stuff.

:eek:


Someone was bound to say it.

Ah yes. That reminds me that the only advantages my male friends could think of for being female were "multiple orgasms and an extra mars bar compartment"... :rolleyes:

Agreed, as long as nobody tries to stick foreign objects up there...:S

well.....

ive read about women who put things like bobby pins into their urethra. *shudder* ive never tried it myself but i suppose it must be similar to what fass was talking about.

Behold, penis-related Darwin Awards!
http://darwinawards.com/personal/personal1999-33.html
http://darwinawards.com/stupid/stupid1999-16.html
http://darwinawards.com/personal/personal1999-15.html
:p

well.....

ive read about women who put things like bobby pins into their urethra. *shudder* ive never tried it myself but i suppose it must be similar to what fass was talking about.
*wince*

Reading about the penis mutilation was pretty bad, but this is a thousand times worse. I don't get how some people can get that region pierced. :S

*wince*

Reading about the penis mutilation was pretty bad, but this is a thousand times worse. I don't get how some people can get that region pierced. :S

it seems pretty dangerous to me. think of the times that an earring gets caught on something and then imagine that problem with a genital piercing.

it seems pretty dangerous to me. think of the times that an earring gets caught on something and then imagine that problem with a genital piercing.

A friend of a friend of mine got her gentital pierced, and was about to have sex with a guy who had his penis pierced. But the two rings got caught and couldn't be moved, so the two of them had to be shipped to the hospital to get the rings removed. Imagine the embarrassment of having to go to the hospital like that!

No - sounding is like a long, rounded, one-pronged tuning fork entering the urethra. The sound (long metal wand) is bent slightly at the end in order to reach the bladder. Surgical lube is used to make the sound slide easily.

I'm not sure if this is used as a tuning fork afterwards (hit with a small hammer)

Some time, when you're not too scared, look up some medical sex toys websites.

There are whole sections dedicated to surgical sounds.

Wait. Wait. Are you saying FASS is wrong about something medical? Isn't he a Doctor or at least a medical student? :confused:

Ah yes. That reminds me that the only advantages my male friends could think of for being female were "multiple orgasms and an extra mars bar compartment"... :rolleyes:

Please, please multiple orgasms. Maybe in my next life I will be graced with an innie instead of an outie. :D

Wait. Wait. Are you saying FASS is wrong about something medical? Isn't he a Doctor or at least a medical student? :confused:

http://forums3.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12061954&postcount=40

By the way, it's not called "sounding" when it's used to treat urethral stenosis.

Medically speaking, one does insert rods made of titanium into the urethra of people who have a narrowing (stenosis) in it to gradually widen it, but that is done under anaesthesia (sometimes general) by a urologist and is continued at home most often with catheters by the patient. The stenosis often recurs, meaning that the procedure must be periodically repeated.

Sounding, on the other hand, is a form of masturbation/genital stimulation in which similar rods are inserted into the urethra, but of course not with an anaesthetic and instead with a lubricant (if a lubricant is even used - some do with, some do without, but it was the lubricant part I was alluding to, not the details of the sounding itself, but as it seems that I am going to be forced to explain the entire procedure because some people obviously cannot read that I was trying not to, here goes), and manipulated back and forth in a sort of penetrative/repenetrative action reminiscent of intercourse. Some sounders insert larger and larger sounds (as the rods are called in the context) to make their urethral lumen wider and wider, and some even use electrical stimulation devices that they hook up to the sound.

There, happy?

*goes to cry*

I've heard of this before...but...*joins you*

There, happy?

Thank you for the explanation.

It seems some guys who are dissatisfied with the size of their hogs have decided that injecting them with vasoline or industrial lubricants will plump them up. Turns out that it causes ulceration of the skin and necrosis of the tissues. Who would have thought that injecting industrial lubricants into your mule was a bad idea?


http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/2006042.stm
http://209.85.12.227/1381/85/emo/laugh.gif

http://forums3.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12061954&postcount=40

By the way, it's not called "sounding" when it's used to treat urethral stenosis.

Medically speaking, one does insert rods made of titanium into the urethra of people who have a narrowing (stenosis) in it to gradually widen it, but that is done under anaesthesia (sometimes general) by a urologist and is continued at home most often with catheters by the patient. The stenosis often recurs, meaning that the procedure must be periodically repeated.

Sounding, on the other hand, is a form of masturbation/genital stimulation in which similar rods are inserted into the urethra, but of course not with an anaesthetic and instead with a lubricant (if a lubricant is even used - some do with, some do without, but it was the lubricant part I was alluding to, not the details of the sounding itself, but as it seems that I am going to be forced to explain the entire procedure because some people obviously cannot read that I was trying not to, here goes), and manipulated back and forth in a sort of penetrative/repenetrative action reminiscent of intercourse. Some sounders insert larger and larger sounds (as the rods are called in the context) to make their urethral lumen wider and wider, and some even use electrical stimulation devices that they hook up to the sound.

There, happy?
The reality is no one is happy for knowing that.

Aren't there REAL, professional procedures to enlarge the penis via surgery?

Aren't there REAL, professional procedures to enlarge the penis via surgery?

Yes, involving injection of fat or implantation of AlloDerm (cadaver skin; nota bene not approved for this use and shunned by more serious plastic surgeons), or the freeing of suspensory ligaments and so on. It can be easily googled.

So why not actually have the... more professional surgery?

I mean, I have no problem with people wanting bigger cocks, I just prefer them not getting horrible infections unless for some bizarre reason they WANT an infection.

This reminds me of the guy who injected cocaine into his urethra. His penis and a good deal of his skin rotted off.

So why not actually have the... more professional surgery?

That costs money and someone else has to do it for you.

That costs money and someone else has to do it for you.

Ugh. So you're trying to tell me these people are doing this either because they don't have the money for this or because they are too embarassed to go to a doctor?

Hint:

Do-it-yourself-surgery is not a good idea.

It seems some guys who are dissatisfied with the size of their hogs have decided that injecting them with vasoline or industrial lubricants will plump them up. Turns out that it causes ulceration of the skin and necrosis of the tissues. Who would have thought that injecting industrial lubricants into your mule was a bad idea?


http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/2006042.stm

Penis+necrosis=unhappy goofball. :(

Ugh. So you're trying to tell me these people are doing this either because they don't have the money for this or because they are too embarassed to go to a doctor?

Or because they are simply dolts. Take your pick.

Or because they are simply dolts. Take your pick.

Is there a D: All of the above option?

Is there a D: All of the above option?

Multiple choice is so un-Swedish.

Multiple choice is so un-Swedish.

A minor flaw. Sweden is still a delightful country. They're the Home of the Sex Toy. :)

OMG. This is the first thread I had to see, pre-breakfast?

OMG. This is the first thread I had to see, pre-breakfast?

Better then immediately post-breakfast. :)

Better then immediately post-breakfast. :)

It's quite put me off sausage and eggs. :-p

Or because they are simply dolts. Take your pick.

Yes, I meant to say that anybody that does... THIS for those reasons is an idiot.

I apologize for being unclear.

It's quite put me off sausage and eggs. :-p

http://www.abestweb.com/smilies/browcho_marx.gif

It's quite put me off sausage and eggs. :-p

what no bacon

A minor flaw. Sweden is still a delightful country. They're the Home of the Sex Toy. :)

True, all true.

Hahahaha!

Ah, the delights of humanity's idiocy.....this is why we have something called "satire" and "irony and wit" and "hypocrisy."

Amusing.....

You said it sister! And yet so many males bring up the topic of penis envy... Personally I'd rather have freedom between my legs!

Mines called "Freedom"! What a coincidence that is....

It seems some guys who are dissatisfied with the size of their hogs have decided that injecting them with vasoline or industrial lubricants will plump them up. Turns out that it causes ulceration of the skin and necrosis of the tissues. Who would have thought that injecting industrial lubricants into your mule was a bad idea?


http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/2006042.stm

Yeah, who would have thought? ;)

Lol

"The man had used a high-pressure pneumatic grease gun to inject his penis.
I couldn't help but laugh. :D