NationStates Jolt Archive

Some dude in Florida was rescued from the jaws of an 11 foot long alligator. He had been smoking crack naked in a lake when the thing attacked him. Hopefully he'll serve as an example to others. If you're going to smoke crack naked do it indoors, not in alligator infested waters.

http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/local/southwest/orl-gator11292006-bk,0,1463816.story?coll=orl-home-headlines

Don't get naked and smoke crack with an alligator.

:(
Thats the most profound thing I've heard all morning. I need a new morning.

*takes note*
Don't smoke crack naked in alligator infested waters. So that's where I've been going wrong all these years.

It wouldn't have attacked him if he'd shared his crack. *nods*

It wouldn't have attacked him if he'd shared his crack. *nods*

Damn crackhead gators...

Damn crackhead gators...

You should see them once they start onto the really hard stuff.

Found my blog post for the day. Score! ;)

You should see them once they start onto the really hard stuff.

The ones on steroids are really scary. You think an aligator is scary as it is? Imagine it with shrunken genitals, roid rage and about twice as big.

The ones on steroids are really scary. You think an aligator is scary as it is? Imagine it with shrunken genitals, roid rage and about twice as big.

http://www.postercrazy.com/fun/parodies/animals/cats/godzilla-cat.jpg

<ohsnip>

http://nodwick.humor.gamespy.com/cats/stoned.jpg

http://nodwick.humor.gamespy.com/cats/stoned.jpg

Oh look. A cat.

Found my blog post for the day. Score! ;)

Throw in this, Nazz ... from His Royal Hipness' rap on Alvar Nunez Cabeza de Vaca, the Gasser ...

And Florida in fifteen hundred and ten was Crocodile City.
You couldn't sit stoop or squat they snap, snap, snappin' all over the place.
And every bug in the jungle is dive bombin' these cats,
and the ones that ain't dive bombin' 'em is hitch hikin' rides on 'em,
and they're beat, bent, flapped, trapped, and de-gigged.

For "Crocodile City" read "Alligator City" :p

Oh look. A cat.


http://www.emerchandise.com/images/p/ALF/pdPOALF0001.jpg

This is why alligators don't make good JW's.

http://neveryetmelted.com/wp-images/alligator-at-door.jpg

The doorbell is over to the right, man. :D

This is why alligators don't make good JW's.

http://neveryetmelted.com/wp-images/alligator-at-door.jpg

The doorbell is over to the right, man. :D

"Goddamned evolution! I need longer arms damn it!

"Goddamned evolution! I need longer arms damn it!

That's the real problem--JW's don't believe in evolution, so that gator will never get the arms he needs to reach the doorbell and preach the word.

That's the real problem--JW's don't believe in evolution, so that gator will never get the arms he needs to reach the doorbell and preach the word.

It should use it's tail.

I suppose there is no chance that this was David Caruso?

Some dude in Florida was rescued from the jaws of an 11 foot long alligator. He had been smoking crack naked in a lake when the thing attacked him. Hopefully he'll serve as an example to others. If you're going to smoke crack naked do it indoors, not in alligator infested waters.

http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/local/southwest/orl-gator11292006-bk,0,1463816.story?coll=orl-home-headlines

Damn. Why did that seem like such a good idea at the time?

This is why alligators don't make good JW's.

http://neveryetmelted.com/wp-images/alligator-at-door.jpg

The doorbell is over to the right, man. :D

Okay, how many of you thought "Land Shark" when you looked at that picture.

[incidentally, does it seem strange that 'Okay' isn't in the Firefox spelling checker?]

Okay, how many of you thought "Land Shark" when you looked at that picture.

[incidentally, does it seem strange that 'Okay' isn't in the Firefox spelling checker?]

Only those of us old enough to know what you're talking about. *nods*

Only those of us old enough to know what you're talking about. *nods*

Candygram.

Isn't it amazing how that show was funny without being insipid, demeaning, or vulgar? I mean for the first few years.

Welcome to Florida Happy Sunshine Tours

If you look on the right, you will see the Old Church built in 1712 by Spanish Settlers and if you see on your left, there is a naked man smoking crack and getting attack by an alligator.Now if you see up ahead.....

I feel sad because I live in Florida, and that happend not to far from UCF ;/



UN :sniper:

I hope he didn't mistake the Alligator for a mermaid :p

Only those of us old enough to know what you're talking about. *nods*

And now, another episode of..."Samurai Alligator"!

I hope he didn't mistake the Alligator for a mermaid :p

I've had the beer goggles on myself before, but an alligator? That's a 3 slab minimum.

I saw in the paper today that animal control killed the Gator.

Why?

That's the dumbest thing I ever heard. Like the police destroying a gun because a guy used it to shoot himself in the head... but even dumber.

I saw in the paper today that animal control killed the Gator.

Why?

That's the dumbest thing I ever heard. Like the police destroying a gun because a guy used it to shoot himself in the head... but even dumber.

But once its dead, the gator is more or less ....controlled

Some dude in Florida was rescued from the jaws of an 11 foot long alligator. He had been smoking crack naked in a lake when the thing attacked him. Hopefully he'll serve as an example to others. If you're going to smoke crack naked do it indoors, not in alligator infested waters.

http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/local/southwest/orl-gator11292006-bk,0,1463816.story?coll=orl-home-headlines

Hey, I don't need you & your "rules" man. ;)