NationStates Jolt Archive

One of my professors is batshit obsessed with the JFK assassination, and it got me wondering if there's any way we'll ever know who killed the ol' boy. I'm sure some of you out there have some good opinions on this, so please do share.

Last I'd heard, Bush Senior was somehow involved...

Castro did it.

Poll's up, so have at it.

I did it.


What? Someone had to say it...might as well get it out of the way.

I think it was Bob Dole.

I did it.


What? Someone had to say it...might as well get it out of the way.

good. Now the healing can begin.

Are the answers meant to be mock-funny (Sam Fisher, Marilyn Monroe...SUICIDE?!

I cannot beleive you'd leave out Illuminati/Majestic-12/Military-Industrial Complex.

Where's the Smoking Man option?

You also left out the variouse goverment offices that have een accused at different points like the CIA or LBJ.

The poll options are my sad attempt at humor (gimme a break, I could only have 10!). Your serious written answers, however, I await with intrigue.

Invisible aliens.

I did it.

No, I'm Spartacus!

I did. With a remote-controlled bullet that could change its direction in flight. Thus I shot him from different angles using just one bullet... err... two bullets.

According to the Rolling Stones, it was you and me.

ETA: Why isn't the poll multichoice?

Last time this poll was conducted on NSG, it was unanimous. Refused Party Program killed JFK.

He's not dead.

You know, I looked at this thread, and I saw "Who killed JFK?"... today 8:43pm by Lunatic Goofballs
And then, everything clicked together in my head. And it all made sense.

so who is this JFK guy then? :D




Suicide, it's his fault for going round in an open topped car.

Where's the option for Jackie hireing hitmen to take him out for getting his jollies from Marylin?

It was a game of bullet tag between JFK, RFK and MLK, otherwise known as the "KKK: K'special K Krew."
What they didn't count on was a jealous LBJ (He wasn't allowed to join the KKK, even when he briefly changed his name to "K'Johnson") killing RFK after he had won.

He's not dead.

You would say that. I notice your name wasn't among the options either... coincidence? Conspiracy?

You would say that. I notice your name wasn't among the options either... coincidence? Conspiracy?

Um...

*drops container of crazy purple knockout gas*

*bolts*

Myrth.

Lee Harvey Oswald, acting alone as he had in his previous attempt to assassinate a general in the Texas National Guard, killed John F. Kennedy. Using a 6.5x52mm M91/38 Mannlicher-Carcano Bolt Action Rifle, which he purchased through a mail order catalog for $19.95, Oswald went off and put three shots in the air, killed Kennedy, wounded Governor Connally, and due to a ricochet, wounded James Tague, a random bystander, as well. Mr. Oswald fled the scene, and wound up shooting a police officer, this shooting drew the attention of the police, who surrounded and arrested him in a theater.

Lee Harvey Oswald, acting alone as he had in his previous attempt to assassinate a general in the Texas National Guard, killed John F. Kennedy. Using a 6.5x52mm M91/38 Mannlicher-Carcano Bolt Action Rifle, which he purchased through a mail order catalog for $19.95, Oswald went off and put three shots in the air, killed Kennedy, wounded Governor Connally, and due to a ricochet, wounded James Tague, a random bystander, as well. Mr. Oswald fled the scene, and wound up shooting a police officer, this shooting drew the attention of the police, who surrounded and arrested him in a theater.

Hey, that's not a conspiracy! This 'truth' nonsense has no place here!

Original thread:
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=368230

Do not grave-dig. The link is provided for educational purposes only.

Lee Harvey Oswald, acting alone as he had in his previous attempt to assassinate a general in the Texas National Guard, killed John F. Kennedy. Using a 6.5x52mm M91/38 Mannlicher-Carcano Bolt Action Rifle, which he purchased through a mail order catalog for $19.95, Oswald went off and put three shots in the air, killed Kennedy, wounded Governor Connally, and due to a ricochet, wounded James Tague, a random bystander, as well. Mr. Oswald fled the scene, and wound up shooting a police officer, this shooting drew the attention of the police, who surrounded and arrested him in a theater.

If the Mannlicher-Carcano was so good, we Italians should have won WW2 all by ourselves. Shooting 5 shots in so close sequence with a bolt-action, and having 2 bullets alone wounding/killing 3 people at that distance... really...
OR
Oswald was the best sharpshooter ever. But the US military don't agree. Source, that book written by that state prosecutor - cannot remember his name now.

My personal theory:

Kennedy knew that the Vietnam war was going to become an expensive and futile screw-up. France had been fighting there pretty much continuously for decades; how much better could America do? But America was already there and couldn't pull out without looking like a pussy. Therefore the war had to go on and escalate, but Kennedy didn't want to take the responsibility. Instead, he wanted to be remembered as one of the greatest presidents of the country, and cutting his term short before the bad reputation started piling up would do just that.

So, Oswald was hired to shoot some bullets around, while Hollywood special effects people were responsible for the injuries to the man's body. Another hitman, Jack Ruby, was hired to take out Oswald before he could be questioned.

These days, Kennedy is probably living in the Bahamas or somewhere under a false identity.

ZOMG! Does that mean...LG is JFK!!????!! :eek:

If the Mannlicher-Carcano was so good, we Italians should have won WW2 all by ourselves. Shooting 5 shots in so close sequence with a bolt-action, and having 2 bullets alone wounding/killing 3 people at that distance... really...
OR
Oswald received more than one lucky break in the incident, the angle that the car was moving at, the speed the car was moving at, where Kennedy was in the car and other factors made an exceptionally golden moment for him to pull the trigger when he did.


Oswald was the best sharpshooter ever. But the US military don't agree. Source, that book written by that state prosecutor - cannot remember his name now.

Jim Garrison made a disgrace of his office by his actions, and of the investigations into the matter that gave real evidence. He falsified information, openly lied and twisted evidence to suit his own needs. The odds are that he should have beens sued for Libel.

The Comedian, because noone watches the watchmen

"Homestar Runner, did you shoot JFK?"

"I suwe did."

Jim Garrison made a disgrace of his office by his actions, and of the investigations into the matter that gave real evidence. He falsified information, openly lied and twisted evidence to suit his own needs. The odds are that he should have beens sued for Libel.

But he wasn't sued and sentenced guilty of falsehood (or whatever) for that, was he? So I guess that his work about JFK is at least accurate, if not definitive.

Oswald received more than one lucky break in the incident, the angle that the car was moving at, the speed the car was moving at, where Kennedy was in the car and other factors made an exceptionally golden moment for him to pull the trigger when he did.


He allegedly didn't fire just one shot, did he?

Also, if you're going to try and kill the president of the US, you don't rely on lucky breaks, do you?

But he wasn't sued and sentenced guilty of falsehood (or whatever) for that, was he? So I guess that his work about JFK is at least accurate, if not definitive.

What the hell are you saying?

He wasn't sued for libel because he didn't libel anyone specific. If he had, he'd have found himself in court right away.

He allegedly didn't fire just one shot, did he?

Also, if you're going to try and kill the president of the US, you don't rely on lucky breaks, do you?

He fired three shots, with a bolt action rifle braced against a windowsill.

This is Lee Harvey Oswald we're talking about, he was certifiably more than a bit nuts, reality didn't work particularly well with him. Beyond that, if you want to kill the President, you HAVE to rely on lucky breaks, because of all the security that surrounds him.

You gotta remember, he tried to kill a General in the Texas National Guard previously, by sneaking up behind his study window and trying to shoot him through the window. Under those conditions, three well placed shots are not unlikely.

Uncle Sam.

Clearly it was Mittens and Snowdrop.

http://www.matazone.co.uk/animpages/kittens-through-time.html

He fired three shots, with a bolt action rifle braced against a windowsill.

This is Lee Harvey Oswald we're talking about, he was certifiably more than a bit nuts, reality didn't work particularly well with him. Beyond that, if you want to kill the President, you HAVE to rely on lucky breaks, because of all the security that surrounds him.

You gotta remember, he tried to kill a General in the Texas National Guard previously, by sneaking up behind his study window and trying to shoot him through the window. Under those conditions, three well placed shots are not unlikely.

Speaking of security, the movie JFK brought up an interesting point about the lack of security around the motorcade. So far the people that say it was Oswald have only taken their hand at trying to prove that there was just one shot that did all those wounds and then the other that shot him in the head - they haven't said anything about the security or the other evidence that points to a government connection.

What the hell are you saying?

He wasn't sued for libel because he didn't libel anyone specific. If he had, he'd have found himself in court right away.

See? It wasn't "libel", after all.

hard to believe the magic bullet defied gravity and physics and was undeformed when found on thecot/stretcher/gurney thingy in parkland hospital

but i believe in science so what

personally i think the man on the grassy knoll and/or in the sewer culvert are/were players too

:headbang: :confused: :confused: :confused: :gundge:

Blame Ruffy!

ZOMG! Does that mean...LG is JFK!!????!! :eek:

Ask not what your clown can do for you, ask what you can do for your clown. :)

He's not dead.
Yes he is.
Died in 2002 in a small run-down retirement home deep in East Texas while fighting an evil Egyptian entity who was feeding off the souls of the residents.

Yes he is.
Died in 2002 in a small run-down retirement home deep in East Texas while fighting an evil Egyptian entity who was feeding off the souls of the residents.

Shit! :(

hard to believe the magic bullet defied gravity and physics and was undeformed when found on thecot/stretcher/gurney thingy in parkland hospital

but i believe in science so what

personally i think the man on the grassy knoll and/or in the sewer culvert are/were players too

:headbang: :confused: :confused: :confused: :gundge:

It only becomes a magic bullet when you screw with analysis of trajectories. In reality, the situation was are simpler.

Furthermore, the bullet was far from undeformed, the marks that are transferred from the rifling to the outside are clearly visible, and the back half of the slug is squashed into an oval shape.

Beyond that, the round had a full metal jacket, which kept it from deforming, the way a FMJ is supposed to do.

Nixon! (just how many people that ran against Nixon, during his political career, got shot or shot at?)

We all killed JFK. He died for our sins.

I did.

Because I want to be someone who repeats the same old joke whilst not reading the entire thread to check that it hasn't been done yet.

I have read the entire thread but that's besides the point.

JFK is dead?! but he was a macho, womanizing stud who conquered the MOON!!

This will be the work of the baby-eating canadians...

Ask not what your clown can do for you, ask what you can do for your clown. :)

What can I do for you?

Marylin Munroe. Yes.

The clues are all there, people, I don't think I need to explain myself... *cycles away*

I put LHO, but only because of the glaring oversight in failing to include "other."

You see, senior members of MI6, Mossad, and other similar organisations involved in the Defence of Humanity have recently determined that while Lee is responsible, there never actually was a "Lee Harvey Oswald". He was inserted into federal records by a careful manipulation of existing data and was in fact a robot piloted by one of the infamous Shamrock Guard, Leprechaun assassins who take suicide pills before a vital mission and are as such very rarely captured for interrogation. Careful measures involving the Leprechauns' partial ability to clone humans (the results are biologically normal, but of vegetable intelligence) concealed the deed.

This is not an isolated event: it is part of a wider conspiracy to enslave humanity instigated by Saint Patrick himself, which in turn dates back to the earliest chapters of the Old Testement. The link between Leprechaun and Lucifer is clear to any theologist with prior knowledge of our malevolent neighbours on Earth and their tampering in our affairs.

The following events and people have all been conclusively linked to Leprechaun scheming:

1)Bush getting power
2)Ariel Sharon falling comatose
3)Stalin
4)Hitler
5)The American Revolution
6)The War of the Spanish Succession
7)Original sin

On a more positive note, I feel it is my duty to debunk the malicious rumours (most originating with our little green antagonists themselves) that any of the participants in the French Revolutionary and Napoleonic wars, or indeed the wars themselves, were Patrick's doing.

That was Osama bin Laden.

Who cares?
The guy who killed him may not be dead, but is most likely hobbling around a retirement home playing bingo and listening to elevator music.

Anyhow, the real question is...Who Killed

Wenceslaus I, Duke of Bohemia?????

FARC. Don't ask me how I know, I just know.

I'm inclined to the House Select Committee finding that though Lee Harvey Oswald fired the killing shots; he wasn't the only gun man and that a second on the grassy noll fired a single shot that missed.

To answer the question; the mafia was responsible but LHO fired the killing shot.

I say the goverment.

No bullets. His head just did that.

No bullets. His head just did that.
That . . . is . . . AWESOME.

JFK is dead?! but he was a macho, womanizing stud who conquered the MOON!!

This will be the work of the baby-eating canadians...

Clone High right?

As for JFK, I dunno, I kinda have doubt that Oswald acted along, I mean unless the gun had a clip, you would have to pull the bolt back, it ejects the casing, and you have to do the whole reloading thing. Alot of time would've passed. There's no way you could've gotten 3 shots off with all of that. Of course I could be wrong.

I would have to say either the CIA or The Mafia.

J Edgar Hoover & the FBI.

J Edgar Hoover & the FBI.

I'd guess Hoover was the one guy not involved.

After I heard Alex Jones make a royal ass of himself by insulting Noam Chomsky, I had finally heard the evidence that I always suspected must exist that Jones is prone to such lunacy. Taking this into account, I still do not discredit Jones' dedicated endeavors to reveal truths concealed by the ultimately organized criminals who inhabit the US gov; while I am still skeptical of his presentations, I am happy to hear such a critic. One in particular of Jones' films elaborately draws numerous connections that links Bush Sr to others more directly involved in the JFK knock-off. According to the film, Hoover was Kennedy's go-to guy when the CIA invaded Cuba without Kennedy's prior knowledge. Kennedy instructed Hoover to locate the CIA's secret training facilities in the US and determine who was responsible for the invasion. When Hoover came back with names, Kennedy canned them all. The theory then goes on to describe a plot of revenge by deposed CIA special forces leaders who took their would-be Castro-assassins to Texas for a reckoning. The GHWBush tie-in is his alleged status as a CIA secret agent who operated a "civilian" oil platform off the coast of Cuba while planning were unfolding for the invasion. Hilariously, according to the documentary, Bush was never officially affiliated with the CIA until becoming director of the organization, in '74 or some such year. Even more clever was the Nixon tie-in, but Jones can explain that one for you...

Many of Jones' films (of which there may be more than 20) are available to download from Bittorrent. Another that I thought was interesting concerns the NY twin towers. Jones argues, elaborately as always, that the buildings were bombed from the inside: effectively, they were professionally demolished. He attempts to discredit the Bush Administration's official conclusions about how the buildings collapsed by interviewing throngs of relevant experts including the designers and builders of the towers...and on and on. The complete substance would be topic for another thread.

"Government and political theory are not dirty; they are at once idealistic and idyllic--clean like a white canvas, and it is thusly why the very same institutions are so vulnerable to being defiled by the illimitable corruptibility of the human spirit by greed." --Jack Sublime

Im about 65% convinced that George Bush Sr was an accessory before the fact in the killing of JFK.
He very probably put together the team that did the actual killing.
During his tenure at the CIA, this is the sort of thing he did.

It seems Prescott Bush, and his son George Sr, had a certain agenda that dealt mainly with Vietnam, and global imperialization that JFK and his brother RFK opposed.

So, essentially, you have one very powerful family removing members of another very powerful family to gain freedom to persue a particular political agenda.

They were successful.

http://www.jfkmurdersolved.com/bush.htm

Not sure about JFK, but the BBC has this interesting article about RFK (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/programmes/newsnight/6169006.stm)