NationStates Jolt Archive

Warning: Don't read this if you don't want to know about my life.


I am in a weird situation and I am frankly a bit depressed about everything. It feels like I am having a mid-life crisis and I am nowhere near mid-life, I hope. I don't think this is really so much a cry for help, but just a complete venting to random strangers whom I will probably never meet. I really don't want to tell all of this to anyone I see in RL.

Several months ago, a close friend went abroad for what was going to be a summer trip, but he in turn liked it so much that he decided to become a permanent resident there. I'm not going to name the country, but because of the current socio-political situation it is very easy for him to relocate there legally, and he already has a job. And another friend of mine has decided that instead of going to college he will continue to invest his time into a business enterprise. It has been in existence for barely more than a fiscal quarter, but he is turning a healthy profit. (As per his request, I am not going to discuss his business. I assure you it is completely legal.) I am stuck at college and I am getting slaughtered by my classes. I love my subject of study (chemistry), but I look at my TAs, many of whom have been worked in industry or are graduate students, and frankly they have some of the most depressing existences.

I was going out with someone, but I just recently found out that she was, behind my back, going out with a friend of mine. Apparently neither could think of a nice way to tell me without hurting my feelings.

There is another guy who is gay, and I have been talking a lot with him lately. He is quite attracted to me, and I am very emotionally attracted to him (have been for a while), but I am not physically attracted to him.

Quite frankly, I have been in worse situations, but everything lately seems to be stacked against me. Every time I handle one of these situations, another something comes along and it is just as bad if not worse as the last thing.

Worse yet, I've noticed for the past couple years, everything always seems bleak and depressing at exactly the same time of the year. This seems to suggest that perhaps I have a psychological disorder (I already know that I exhibit textbook symptoms of many nervous disorders), but I can't stand the idea of seeking professional help (I had a bad experience as a kid), although I also know that self-diagnosis and self-treatment often ends up by worsening the condition.

Thoughts?

If it's any help, you can always ship the gay guy over to me and I'll take care of his physical needs for you >.>

Seriously, my friends, it's normal to be feeling a little depressed. You're simply questioning yourself and your deicions for the future, and are a little down because you lost two friends and a girlfriend. Heck, if you were all cheery and peppy, I'd b much more worried about your sanity.

Just try to stay calm and work on one thing at a time. There are things that are out of your control: like the two friends drifting apart, and the girlfriend leaving you. Instead work on what you CAN control, like trying to renew your circle of friends, your studies, and yourself and how you cope with loss.

Sometimes you just have a bad day. Other times you just have a bad year(happened to me last year). Better times are always around the corner, provided you're smart enough not to dwell on failures and instead focus on getting things right. Think of the solution, not the problem.

When the world changes around you, life often looks bleak and depressing. And at your age, late teens / early twenties, there are going to be changes. Though it's easy for me to say at a distance of at least 30 years, you should try to deal with the changes as the come along and not let them weigh on your mind. And if you feel like making a change, make one. It's easier when you're young and haven't as much baggage.

As for everything getting bleak at the same time of the year, it could just be SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seasonal_affective_disorder)). There are a number of different treatments but I find that when the Winter Blues get to me, I make sure I have all the lights on in the house (no sitting in the dark), and I do things I enjoy, like rereading a favorite book or watching favorite movies or just getting together with people.

Hang in there, after December 22nd, the days start getting longer and Spring isn't far behind!

Warning: Don't read this if you don't want to know about my life.


I am in a weird situation and I am frankly a bit depressed about everything. It feels like I am having a mid-life crisis and I am nowhere near mid-life, I hope. I don't think this is really so much a cry for help, but just a complete venting to random strangers whom I will probably never meet. I really don't want to tell all of this to anyone I see in RL.

Several months ago, a close friend went abroad for what was going to be a summer trip, but he in turn liked it so much that he decided to become a permanent resident there. I'm not going to name the country, but because of the current socio-political situation it is very easy for him to relocate there legally, and he already has a job. And another friend of mine has decided that instead of going to college he will continue to invest his time into a business enterprise. It has been in existence for barely more than a fiscal quarter, but he is turning a healthy profit. (As per his request, I am not going to discuss his business. I assure you it is completely legal.) I am stuck at college and I am getting slaughtered by my classes. I love my subject of study (chemistry), but I look at my TAs, many of whom have been worked in industry or are graduate students, and frankly they have some of the most depressing existences.

I was going out with someone, but I just recently found out that she was, behind my back, going out with a friend of mine. Apparently neither could think of a nice way to tell me without hurting my feelings.

There is another guy who is gay, and I have been talking a lot with him lately. He is quite attracted to me, and I am very emotionally attracted to him (have been for a while), but I am not physically attracted to him.

Quite frankly, I have been in worse situations, but everything lately seems to be stacked against me. Every time I handle one of these situations, another something comes along and it is just as bad if not worse as the last thing.

Worse yet, I've noticed for the past couple years, everything always seems bleak and depressing at exactly the same time of the year. This seems to suggest that perhaps I have a psychological disorder (I already know that I exhibit textbook symptoms of many nervous disorders), but I can't stand the idea of seeking professional help (I had a bad experience as a kid), although I also know that self-diagnosis and self-treatment often ends up by worsening the condition.

Thoughts?

I doubt you have a psychological disorder. You've most likely had to stomach a lot of crap, and the effects are manifesting only just now. I prescribe that you leave the girl, take a semester off, and think about how to pursue your love of chemistry without destroying yourself.

everything always seems bleak and depressing at exactly the same time of the year. This seems to suggest that perhaps I have a psychological disorder

That's not a psychological disorder. That's what's called November. :p

Seriously, though. I can't really offer any helpful hints towards a "solution" of any of this, because I think that every single one of these issues is something that you unfortunately have to figure out for yourself - what do I want to do with my life; whom am I attracted to; am I what one would call "sane"? :p

But hey, since these questions never really change no matter how old you get, I'll offer at least one piece of advice: lighten up.
Things have a tendency to sort themselves out one way or another, even if it doesn't seem so and even if it takes time. :fluffle:

Take a deep breath, step back from the issue a little bit, and try to see things as objectively as you are able.

It does suck to have your friends leave, but there are always new friends to be made, and you can keep in contact with the old ones.

Life is change. The faster we can learn to adapt to it, the better off we're going to be.

That's not a psychological disorder. That's what's called November. :p

Seriously, though. I can't really offer any helpful hints towards a "solution" of any of this, because I think that every single one of these issues is something that you unfortunately have to figure out for yourself - what do I want to do with my life; whom am I attracted to; am I what one would call "sane"? :p

But hey, since these questions never really change no matter how old you get, I'll offer at least one piece of advice: lighten up.
Things have a tendency to sort themselves out one way or another, even if it doesn't seem so and even if it takes time. :fluffle:

*forehead slap* November!

And yeah, what WYTYG said.

Clarification: I'm not so depressed that my friend left the country/did not go to college. It just seems like they are having the time of their lives and I am pissing away my youth.

Clarification: I'm not so depressed that my friend left the country/did not go to college. It just seems like they are having the time of their lives and I am pissing away my youth.

So take some time off from school and go move in with one of them. :p Or tell them to shut up about how great their lives are. Seriously, there must be something good about your life. NS General? Okay, maybe not that, but ...

Frankly, I just wanted to vent.

I appreciate the advice. It really helped most to put it all out. I really don't care that I may never meet any of you. I just felt like venting everything on my mind.

Frankly, I just wanted to vent.

I appreciate the advice. It really helped most to put it all out. I really don't care that I may never meet any of you. I just felt like venting everything on my mind.

Nope, sorry, we're running your life now. Did you ever see the "Sorceror's Apprentice" episode from Fantasia? You've animated the brooms, we're going to sweep you up and carry you away now.

So, tell me, have you been eating right? What did you have for dinner? When was the last time you called your parents? :D

I'm going to be firm, no wishy washy crap:

You are not insane or have a disorder, being a hypochondriact will not help anything.

People get dumped all the time, you will foget about it in a while.

A Chemistry Degree is a fantastic one which offers a large number of oppertunities. My brother in law has become an executive in a BIG company, and the only qualification he had was one in bio-chemistry.

oooh with a chemistry degree you can work as a chemical warfare expert sounds like allot of fun to me:)

And yeah I know the feeling all to well of having your friends move away to foreign countries (though all there plans have fallen to shit which I can‘t decide whither to be glad about:D/:( ) either way you have a gay friend now so life is now a sitcom in other words get a job at B&Q and spend all your money at nightclubs!!!

Frankly, I just wanted to vent.

I appreciate the advice. It really helped most to put it all out. I really don't care that I may never meet any of you. I just felt like venting everything on my mind.

That's okay, we all need to vent sometimes :)

It sounds like the seasonal depression thing though, I'd get it checked out if it's happened before now aroud the same time of year. However you are goign through a lot of stuff, so that also may be it.

To get off subject, I just found out my ,er, Pancakea's ex is bisexual. :eek: