NationStates Jolt Archive

I'm fairly well a n00b for General posting, so forgive me if this has been done before.

Looking for people's worst drinking stories. Anytime you woke up in a strange city with a hangover the size of Texas and don't speak the local language would definitely count. Me, I've never had anything quite that bad occur, but there have been some doozies.

A few years back, on the weekend of my now-common-law-wife's birthday, I decided to teach her and another friend of ours how to play a card drinking game....and lost. Over and over and over again. Didn't help that she was drinking a mild liquer, our friend was drinking a rum cooler, and I was drinking Sambuca, straight. Needless to say, I ended up on the rough end of that deal. My own fault for teaching them how to play so well, I guess.

I've got a few more, at least one more involving sambuca (the evil mistress ramazotti), but I want to hear yours.

What have you got?

Uh... none, believe it or not. I don't drink, I do weed.

Uh... none, believe it or not. I don't drink, I do weed.

Been a while for me to have any weed. Any good stoner stories?

Don't drink
Don't Smoke
Don't do Drugs.

Don't drink
Don't Smoke
Don't do Drugs.

uhhhh....is that a statement of yourself or a command? I can't really tell.

Been a while for me to have any weed. Any good stoner stories?
I got plenty.

My favourite one is actually rather odd.

My boyfriend was out for the night at his friend's house, and I wanted to smoke. I can't roll so I have one of those funky glass pipes.

I filled it up, and went outside to smoke.

My dad had just rolled his cigarettes (he prefers to roll his own, and added in a little hash), and had come outside as well.

Most parents would hit the roof if they knew their child smoked marijuana. My dad knows I did, and didn't say anything when he sat down outside with me. It was nice smoking together, even if we didn't share my pipe.

It's usually a bad idea to call family members while drunk.

It's usually a bad idea to call family members while drunk.

The very idea of having to deal with family members other than my brother while I'm intoxicated sobers me up pretty quick.

Ok.

One night my then boyfriend and I went out to a bar. We had a lot to drink. I'm about 5'4" and 135 lbs. and had two beers, two shots of whiskey, and a Long Island iced-tea. We stumbled back to my apartment, and needless to say, I wasn't feeling very well when I got home.

Now, my boyfriend had my cell phone in his pocket, and it was the kind where the buttons were on the front. I started getting very very sick, crying, throwing up, etc., and my boyfriend, being the kind guy that he was, was helping me through my...uh...issue.

He was bending over and holding my hair back, but as the cell phone was in his pocket, the speed-dial key got pressed, dialing my dad in Washington state at 3 in the morning. He picks up, hears me weeping and saying "I wish I was dead!" and a male voice saying something (he couldn't make it out) and automatically assumed I was being raped or murdered or something. So he calls the police.

Now neither myself nor my boyfriend had any idea what was going on, so we were really surprised when the police showed up, separated myself and my boyfriend, and questioned us separately. They kept asking me if he had hurt me, if I wanted to tell them anything, etc. I think I passed out shortly after that and remember waking up the next day and having to call my dad and explain what happened.

Anyway, that's my worst drunk story. And also the longest post I have written. :D

uhhhh....is that a statement of yourself or a command? I can't really tell.

Statement of myself.

well the teenagers in my family get scared if they see me around bottles of drink

Morganatron: That is an awesome story. Would've sucked to have been there, but that's one to remember.

Wilgrove: Congradulations. I don't know too many who have the strength of personality to avoid them all. Good for you.

Imperial isa: If it's not too personal, why do the teens not like you around alcohol? If it is too personal, just say so and I'll shut up about it.

It's usually a bad idea to call family members while drunk.

Or prospective girlfriends when you're fucked off your face on mushies. Or your mate who's also got the fear on the bus home.

"Get high on sports, not drugs. But if there are no sports in your area, fuck it; get high on drugs." -George Carlin

"Get high on sports, not drugs. But if there are no sports in your area, fuck it; get high on drugs." -George Carlin

Now that's wisdom I can live by!

Morganatron: That is an awesome story. Would've sucked to have been there, but that's one to remember.

Wilgrove: Congradulations. I don't know too many who have the strength of personality to avoid them all. Good for you.

Imperial isa: If it's not too personal, why do the teens not like you around alcohol? If it is too personal, just say so and I'll shut up about it.

will this what i think by going on what they have told me

get me pissed,drop me behind front lines with lots of ammo and i may win the war

as i have no idea what i did i just go by what they have told me

i all so say they lucky that the sword i got on my 21st was not at my home at the time this happen

Wilgrove: Congradulations. I don't know too many who have the strength of personality to avoid them all. Good for you.

All it takes is a strong distaste for anything containing alcohol. Beer tastes like sewage, and wine...ugh. And the only thing I ever smoke, and this is once in a blue moon, is a fine cigar. And those things are actually kind of nice.

I don't know too many people who don't touch any of them...I was at a social event Friday night and someone looked at me like I had three heads when I asked for a Pepsi instead of something with liquor in it...mind your own business and pour my Pepsi, fucker.

Horror stories:

1st serious drinking experience: several shots of straight liquor, a couble of beers, some more straight liquor, a wine cooler, crappy wine, mixed liquor, pass out, wake up, vomit. Repeat the last three steps.

Getting dumped and embarassed by my 1st serious girlfriend: 3/4 of a fifth of Jack in under 30 minutes. On an empty stomach. While still a relatively inexperienced drinker. I burst some blood vessels around my eyes sockets.

A bad New Years Eve: in the space of about 32 hours, I downed 2 pint sized beers, 2 liter sized beers, a shot of Jack, and 2 double shots of Jose. Again, on an empty stomach.

A friends horror story: An old friend from Texas, who was not too long out of the US Navy and a general all around nut, came to visit. After several bars, we stopped in at a place just down the street for a final wind down beer (at about 1:30 am). A couple of Japanese guys sat down with us. Long story short, my friend J. took offense when one of the Japanese guys said Japanese could drink more than Texans. A bottle of Tequila was called for. Shots were traded. A second boittle was called for. More shots were traded. J "won" when he could actually stand up and the Japanese guy couldn't. His reward was a pretty nasty case of ethanol poisoning. :(


Don't drink
Don't Smoke

what do you do?

Don't drink
Don't Smoke

what do you do?

Subtle innuends follow
There must be something inside

(Heh. That reference'll likely go over some heads, as well as dating - me for sure I point out that song came out when I was not much older than you, Wilgrove, and i'm somewhere in the neighborhood of twice your age. ;))

I got plenty.

My favourite one is actually rather odd.

My boyfriend was out for the night at his friend's house, and I wanted to smoke. I can't roll so I have one of those funky glass pipes.

I filled it up, and went outside to smoke.

My dad had just rolled his cigarettes (he prefers to roll his own, and added in a little hash), and had come outside as well.

Most parents would hit the roof if they knew their child smoked marijuana. My dad knows I did, and didn't say anything when he sat down outside with me. It was nice smoking together, even if we didn't share my pipe.

Nice one. Not a horror story (as per the OP) but still a nice one.

I'm a fairly serious drug addict and alcoholic, so I have plenty of horror stories. The last really bad one was back in the summer. I was in a bar drinking scotch and shooting pool, when the girl I was there with starts feeding me xanax. I woke up the next day around noon, in a pool of dried vomit, beat all to hell. I couldn't find my wallet so I went outside to see if it was in my truck. My truck was beaten up worse than me. Evidently I had sideswiped something large and concrete on the drive home. Both passenger side wheels were fucked up, the mirror and window were gone on that side also. I swore to never mix pills and alcohol again, but you know, I probably will.

(Heh. That reference'll likely go over some heads, as well as dating - me for sure I point out that song came out when I was not much older than you, Wilgrove, and i'm somewhere in the neighborhood of twice your age. ;))

Pity the 'don't smoke/don't drink' lines were in the wrong order.

Personally my first thought was 'Out Of Step'.

Evidently I had sideswiped something large and concrete on the drive home. Both passenger side wheels were fucked up, the mirror and window were gone on that side also. I swore to never mix pills and alcohol again, but you know, I probably will.

Feel free to fuck up your own body as much as you want, but don't get behind the wheel when you do it. That's just murder waiting to happen.

i all so say they lucky that the sword i got on my 21st was not at my home at the time this happen

Somewhat frightening. Luck is not a bad thing sometimes.

mind your own business and pour my Pepsi, fucker.

Testify! I enjoy the occassional drink, but I can't look down on those who don't.


(Heh. That reference'll likely go over some heads, as well as dating - me for sure I point out that song came out when I was not much older than you, Wilgrove, and i'm somewhere in the neighborhood of twice your age. ;))


Goody Two Shoes? Adam Ant I think.

Feel free to fuck up your own body as much as you want, but don't get behind the wheel when you do it. That's just murder waiting to happen.

Good logic. When you're already all fucked up, logic takes a vacation, though. Not condoning it. I usually cab it since I don't drive.

I was hoping there would be more 'horror' involved in these stories e.g. "I had just bought my second pint of bitter when a gang of chainsaw wielding zombies burst in to the public bar of the Ferret and Balloon..."

Good logic. When you're already all fucked up, logic takes a vacation, though. Not condoning it. I usually cab it since I don't drive.

Taking your truck with you when you go out drinking spirits in a bar is hardly just a case of a drunken slip.

...Goody Two Shoes? Adam Ant I think.

Thanks. Now I can't get that song out of my head. :P

Don't drink
Don't Smoke
Don't do Drugs.

Same here:cool:

Well had a friend that climbed into the back of someone’s truck when drunk down town. In January in Minnesota, The guy left there and drove down to the cities the next morning (about a 90 mile trip or so)

He woke up and had to wait for the guy to get done with work so he could get a ride back up to St. Cloud. Damn lucky he did not get frostbite riding in an unheated truck all night

Nice one. Not a horror story (as per the OP) but still a nice one.
Actually, he asked if I had any GOOD stone stories, after I had originally said that I don't drink, I smoke weed.

Pity the 'don't smoke/don't drink' lines were in the wrong order.

Personally my first thought was 'Out Of Step'.

Err.... I haven't heard it in a while, but I pretty sure it was "don't drink, don't smoke", not the other way around...

Goody Two Shoes? Adam Ant I think.

Indeed - off Friend or Foe. It was a UK #1 hit, and hit #12 in the US.

Thanks. Now I can't get that song out of my head. :P


Blame Wilgrove.

In the morning, I'll post the horror story of "Rum and Pills" and a major trauma center ER on a busy Saturday night...

I have 3 good ones:
1) Drinking on the lake I got totally trashed and offered a DNR officer a beer(underage drinking charges were dropped thankfully)
2) Let's just say Cold Duck should be known as Hangover in a Bottle. and drinking 2 bottles along with another giant bottle of cheap white zinfadel. and when I ran out, I started on the rum runner. That was the only time I've ended up barfing, after my fellow drunk friend decided to clean the shower in my bathroom with an entire gallon of clorox. :upyours: but ya, people decided to add onto that by throwing firecrackers at me to watch me try to grab them and throw them back at them.
3) Went out to this cool little island type deal up at my lakehouse for july 4th with my marine and army buddies. Between the five of us, we killed a handle of rum handle of vodka, half a fifth of silver rum, and a handlesized margarita mix(of course with tequila in it). All of that we did before midnight, when we decided to move the fire from the beach up into the woods. We got that fire started and somehow my bro's boxers ended up in the fire. He then managed to pull his shirt off and throw it on the fire 10 minutes later with this goofy smile on his face. So I decided he shouldn't take the medicine he was on for something or another. He tried to get them from me a little while later, and managed to get a giant aerosol can of something out of the bag and threw it into the fire for some reason. So after throwing him behind a log and waking up the army guys and watching them do the run and dive exactly like you see in the movies I got to see the biggest explosion I have ever seen. at least a 15 ft radius ball of fire, kind of sparking a forest fire that I was the only one sober enough to put out...We heard people on the other side of the lake applauding it, then they tried to outdo us with fireworks as a response...BEST NIGHT EVER!!!!!!!!!

Somewhat frightening. Luck is not a bad thing sometimes.

iam with you on that one
luck indeed not a bad thing sometimes

I was hoping there would be more 'horror' involved in these stories e.g. "I had just bought my second pint of bitter when a gang of chainsaw wielding zombies burst in to the public bar of the Ferret and Balloon..."
Actually... I might have an interesting one.

Like I said previously, I usually don't drink, except on St Patrick's Day. My boyfriend likes to humour me, and joined me as we went to two or three bars on this past St Paddy's day.

Now, he's what one might consider a 'lightweight'.

He can't handle alcohol very well, and easily gets three sheets to the wind (and he still doesn't get what that means). I can take mine pretty well, and this is considering I'm about 5'4" 1/2, 175 lbs, and he's over 6", well over 240.

I like hard liquor and hate beer, except for imported stuff from Europe. I prefer vodka.

He's a beer guy.

Anyway, he decided to try a Long Island Ice Tea. I can down two and feel almost nothing. He's a lightweight and gets slightly tipsey after half a pint.

Now, onward.

We were out drinking and we ordered a pitcher of green beer. This is after I had a cooler and an Long Island. He had finished one beer at another pub. We ordered some local pale ale (tastes like swill!).

He only got through the first one, and half of one in the time I had two. He couldn't finish the latter half, so I wound up having it.

We then went to another place, I had an After 8 Martini and he had a speciality coffee...

About 30 minutes later back at my apartment, we were sitting around and he says to me, "let's shave my back."

He's really hairy and I found that hair disgusting.

Despite being intoxicated (since I was at this point as well) we went ahead and shaved his back anyway, and then did the front!

He mourned the lost of his chest hair the next morning.

I was hoping there would be more 'horror' involved in these stories e.g. "I had just bought my second pint of bitter when a gang of chainsaw wielding zombies burst in to the public bar of the Ferret and Balloon..."

I'll see if I can accomodate you, on that one. More is style of story than actual event, but bear with me.

It was this past summer. I was at camp with the family and the in-laws. We had been there for under an hour, at about 5 in the afternoon, when I get offered a beer by my father in law, Sam. He barely even speaks to me, so I'm not going to turn down a beer. Finish that off in about 10 minutes, so that it doesn't have a chance to get cold.

Dinner time. We eat. Relax. Unpack enough to sleep that night. Get the fire started in the firepit.

It's getting dark. Beers all around. I've pulled out the guitar for a bit of plaing and singing. Grand old night. Sam pulls out a bottle of my arch nemesis Ramazotti. The Licorice Bitch. Soul Swallowing Sambuca. I can never resist the wiles of that evil temptress. There are three of us sharing the bottle: Myself, Sam, and a friend of the in-laws, Mary. Sam and Mary are making fun of the way each other wheezes and sputters after each shot. I'm taking this liquid down like a pro. Savouring the sickeningly sweet warmth as it slides down my throat. After a few shots, my vocals have been shot to a point where singing is no longer an option and my manual dexterity is not up to the challenge of basic chording, but I still feel fine. A few more shots. Have another beer. Ramazotti whispers in my ear that there's room for another shot or two in my belly. Lying whore. I take her in, engorging myself in that sultry aperatif.

Finally the bottle is gone. It's late. Time for bed. Crawl under the covers. Close my eyes.

Ramazotti:"WAKE UP BITCH! THIS NIGHT AIN'T OVER YET!!

What?

YOU HEARD ME. TIME TO PAY FOR WHAT YOU SWALLOWED!!

Oh Crap!

I charge outside, fall to the ground in a helpless heap, hearing the insane laughter of that sambucan slut as she comes barrelling out of my gut over and over and over again. I wanted to die. At one point, I look up, and there's my mother in law, just snickering at me. I couldn't even work up the strength to tell her to fuck off. I was sure I was dying, but that bitch ramazotti wouldn't let me. She held me just barely to life so that I could be tortured more. I finally passed out into the glorious relief that is oblivion. I could barely care if I was dead or not, I just wanted the pain to stop.

The morning dawns. I'm alive. And in bed. I don't really remember getting there, but who cares. My head isn't too bad. Go get some coffee that someone was generous enough to have already brewed. It's over. I can rest peacefully knowing that I've gotten it out of my system. Sip away at the coffee. Sit in the shade and have a smoke.

OH SHIT! SHE'S BACK!!

Ramazotti has returned for her final payment for the previous night's entertainment. The bitch has turned pimp, beating me from the inside out one more time, just to be sure that I got the message. Another half hour of expelling what remains of the liquid harlot from my now aching entrails and I crawl back into bed.

I survive through the day. Barely.

Another fire gets started the next night. Mary pulls out another bottle of Sambuca.

"You want a shot?"

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Taking your truck with you when you go out drinking spirits in a bar is hardly just a case of a drunken slip.


Fair enough. I won't argue against that at all.

Kiv, as you can probably imagine, I've got stories that would fill this thread beyond belief, my friend. We'll save 'em for chats, though. ;)

Kiv, as you can probably imagine, I've got stories that would fill this thread beyond belief, my friend. We'll save 'em for chats, though. ;)

I wouldn't doubt it at all, my good man. Forgot that you venture into General every now and then.;)

Hmm? Which time?

Well the one that makes me still cringe is simply this:

Pissed off at a girl + One bottle of Wild Turkey = Much misery the next day.

I can't even stand the smell of it anymore. *cringe*

I wouldn't doubt it at all, my good man. Forgot that you venture into General every now and then.;)

Yeah, when the UN bores me and I'm wasted. ;)

Yeah, when the UN bores me and I'm wasted. ;)

I'm not wasted, since the baby's still running around, but the UN is being lame today. 'Swhy I came over.

Hmm? Which time?

Well the one that makes me still cringe is simply this:

Pissed off at a girl + One bottle of Wild Turkey = Much misery the next day.

I can't even stand the smell of it anymore. *cringe*


you can't stand the smell of Wild Turkey

will after what i did i can't stand the smell of Jim Bean
*oh i had it with out coke*

so i know how you feel

Not my worst, but most recent.

A couple Saturdays ago I tried my first Belfast car bombs and my first Jaeger bombs. Had more vodka than I care to remember, discovered that I actually like Tequilla.

I managed to climb up a very wobbly fire escape (can't climb up it while sober), puked my guts out off the roof of the building.

It gets confusing after that, but I woke up with my nails painted and a girlfriend.

Not my worst, but most recent.

A couple Saturdays ago I tried my first Belfast car bombs and my first Jaeger bombs. Had more vodka than I care to remember, discovered that I actually like Tequilla.

I managed to climb up a very wobbly fire escape (can't climb up it while sober), puked my guts out off the roof of the building.

It gets confusing after that, but I woke up with my nails painted and a girlfriend.

1# are you still with her
2# iam guesting she dont know how it happen too

I saw on the news once (in the 80s or 90s) where a man got drunk in Texas, got on his boat and woke up off the Florida coast! :eek:

My worst drinking horror story was when I decided I didn't want to drink anymore. I drank a lot in the early 80s and decided I really didn't like it anymore so I drank 3 bottles of Yeagermiester (took me about 30 hours) getting sick many times along the way but continuing nontheless. When I finally woke up with the worst hangover ever (and that horrible yeager taste in my mouth that lingered for months) I never wanted to get drunk again. Since the early 80s I have only had a couple of drinks on some New Years Eve's and 2 shots of whiskey (gargle one then spit it out then drink one) when my throat gets that itchy feeling, indicating the onset of a cold or flu. (I bought a fifth of whiskey for that very purpose 15 years ago and havn't gone through half of it yet)

If I was caught drinking in the early 80's my parents would have been arrested. I was born in the late 70's

Not exactly a drinking story, though we did start off by drinking. I was out with my brother when he scored a couple of hits of acid. I vaguely remember being out on the dance floor and later having to slap some guys hands off me several times.

The next thing I remember was a very bright light in my face and someone forcing plastic between my clenched teeth. I tried to move my arms and they were tied down.

Turned out I was in the hospital emergency room and in restraints. They didn't know what I'd taken so they pumped me full of charcoal. The cops had brought me in, saying I was halucinating and being combative. They'd brought a couple of people in from the same club. Rather potent stuff. Anyway, I spent the rest of the morning puking up black crap. My mom had to pick me up at the hospital. Apparently my lovely brother had abandoned me and hitched a ride home, so mom also had to take me back to the club to get my car. Fun had by all.

BK, that qualifies as a truly shitty night. Well, morning after at least. You might've had fun that night. Who knows?

BK, that qualifies as a truly shitty night. Well, morning after at least. You might've had fun that night. Who knows?

If you can't remember it, it doesn't qualify as fun. :eek:

BK, I'm glad puking up charcoal was the worst of it. :)

If you can't remember it, it doesn't qualify as fun. :eek:

You do have a very good point.

Do I win a prize if I have the worst story?
I have one where I drank an entire bottle of vodka and woke up with a broken cheekbone and looked like I'd lost a fight to a bunch of Hell's Angels. Come to think of it, I was with my brother that night too. :rolleyes:

Do I win a prize if I have the worst story?
I have one where I drank an entire bottle of vodka and woke up with a broken cheekbone and looked like I'd lost a fight to a bunch of Hell's Angels. Come to think of it, I was with my brother that night too. :rolleyes:

I think you win a bottle of whatever you were drinking when the story happened. And as the Armenians say, "If brothers were a good idea, God would have one."

Do I win a prize if I have the worst story?
I have one where I drank an entire bottle of vodka and woke up with a broken cheekbone and looked like I'd lost a fight to a bunch of Hell's Angels. Come to think of it, I was with my brother that night too. :rolleyes:

I, unfortunately, have no prize to offer, other than my heartfelt sympathy that you have had some very rough experiences.

You should maybe consider less intoxication time with your brother.

Do I win a prize if I have the worst story?

You're only gonna have the worst story if I don't chime in. ;)

I have one where I drank an entire bottle of vodka and woke up with a broken cheekbone and looked like I'd lost a fight to a bunch of Hell's Angels.

Yeah, you'd lose. :p

Come to think of it, I was with my brother that night too. :rolleyes:

Might wanna reconsider hanging out with your brother. ;)

Don't tease. Tell them the nice stories if you're going to say that yours are better.

How about the one involving B&E with intent to sleep?:P

Don't tease. Tell them the nice stories if you're going to say that yours are better.

How about the one involving B&E with intent to sleep?:P

Damn you! You know too much. You must be exterminated.

http://freespace.virgin.net/steve.redfearn/Graphics/JPG/Renegade%20Daleks%20(22).jpg

Exterminate! EXTERMINATE!

You don't want to exterminate me. Then you'd never find out wher I hid the booze.

You don't want to exterminate me. Then you'd never find out wher I hid the booze.

No need. I've got a case of beer sitting next to me right now. :p

:D I know my 'drinking' story was a horro one, but does it win for most stupid?

:D I know my 'drinking' story was a horro one, but does it win for most stupid?

Not even close. ;)

Not even close. ;)

C'mon, how many guys would let their girlfriend shave their backs and chest?

C'mon, how many guys would let their girlfriend shave their backs and chest?

How many guys have woken up in jail for trying to enter the wrong house to pass out? :p

EDIT: And I'm starting to think that Kiv started this thread for the sole purpose of dragging this story outta me...

KILL YOU, KIV! LOL

How many guys have woken up in jail for trying to enter the wrong house to pass out? :p

No idea. Uh... was it a smouldering crater?

No idea. Uh... was it a smouldering crater?

No, my real name's not Kal El. :p

EDIT: And I'm starting to think that Kiv started this thread for the sole purpose of dragging this story outta me...

KILL YOU, KIV! LOL


I had no way of knowing that this would be a day you'd come to general.

No, my real name's not Kal El. :p

Stoned weasel says what?

I had no way of knowing that this would be a day you'd come to general.

I'm usually here Monday through Friday. You knew. You did this on purpose! :p

I will say this - just because I myself never got drunk doesn't mean I haven't heard a few good stories...all from fellow college students. And all of them serve as warnings.

One that I recall was a fellow student confessing to one time when he drank an entire bottle of Southern Comfort during a commercial break, or something like that. I imagine he didn't drink the WHOLE thing in just a couple of minutes, but he was hammered enough that, when he woke up from the whole ordeal, he was naked and his head was in a cat's litter box. Not exactly how I want to wake up.

Also in college during my second year, a freshman walked up to me and my best friend and told us that he needed help because someone was after him. He says he got into a fight or something in the laundry room with a guy he called "Dr. Pepper" for no other reason than that he was wearing a Dr. Pepper shirt. He also uttered the phrase, referring to aforementioned "Dr. Pepper", "He tried to put a drill bit in my ear." I don't think my body could withstand the amount of crack I would have to smoke to have that sentence make the least bit of sense to me. Needless to say, for the rest of the time he was in our hall, we called him "Drill Bit." Sadly, he graduated from my high school.

Another person got completely smashed at a conference and started talking insane nonsense...I believe her exact words were, "Jesus' teeth were so white; he must have dentures!" In my most sleep-deprived times, I couldn't imagine making sense of that. Apparently she also made reference to knowing George Washington and tried to fall asleep in a little wedge of floor between the bed and the wall that was about a foot wide. At the conferences I went to in college, people got loaded out of their minds on a nightly basis and were magically up and sober the next day at 9 AM. On a weekend. When the average student gets up at noon on weekends. Or at least I did.

I'm usually here Monday through Friday. You knew. You did this on purpose! :p

I'm almost never here. Honest and for true, dude. Or maybe I'm lying and was trying to lure you in....:cool:

I will say this - just because I myself never got drunk doesn't mean I haven't heard a few good stories...all from fellow college students. And all of them serve as warnings.

One that I recall was a fellow student confessing to one time when he drank an entire bottle of Southern Comfort during a commercial break, or something like that. I imagine he didn't drink the WHOLE thing in just a couple of minutes, but he was hammered enough that, when he woke up from the whole ordeal, he was naked and his head was in a cat's litter box. Not exactly how I want to wake up.

That is one of the worst ways I can imagine waking up. Not the worst, but right up there.


Another person got completely smashed at a conference and started talking insane nonsense...I believe her exact words were, "Jesus' teeth were so white; he must have dentures!" In my most sleep-deprived times, I couldn't imagine making sense of that. Apparently she also made reference to knowing George Washington and tried to fall asleep in a little wedge of floor between the bed and the wall that was about a foot wide. At the conferences I went to in college, people got loaded out of their minds on a nightly basis and were magically up and sober the next day at 9 AM. On a weekend. When the average student gets up at noon on weekends. Or at least I did.

I think Jesus had his own special heavenly toothpaste. He wouldn't need dentures.:p

I'm almost never here. Honest and for true, dude. Or maybe I'm lying and was trying to lure you in....:cool:

Wouldn't surprise me a bit. :p

Would anything about me surprise you at this point?;)

once i went to a foam-party with 4 friends and because the party was to far away to cycle we slept in the house of a girl one of my friends knew. her parents were building some extra rooms on their house and we could sleep in the new building, wich was only brick (no windows etc.).
me and 3 friends slept on one matras and the girl slept on another matras with a nother girl.
so we went to the party and got soaking wet and i got very drunk. all my friends went home pretty fast, but i stayed till the end.
when i did go to the house i first followed a group of people that i didn't know and followed them till their car, but i continued when they asked me what i was doing in their car.
thanks to another friend who was assisting me i fortunatly found the way home. when i arrived i was still soaking wet, so i took of all my clothes in front of everybody, right in the only spot there was light from the street. according to my friends (i have no memories from that night) i stood there for about 5 minutes, saying "look away, i'm naked".
then when i finaly got in my sleeping bag i had to puke really hard. fortunatly they had forseen this and had a bucket. after that i had to pee and because i couldn't go to the toilet because of my inability to walk i peed in the room everybody was sleeping, wich is now the girl her bedroom.

it sucked to wake up and find everybody staring at you and telling what you did.

on newyears eve i once got home on my knees for probably more than 100 meters. and then vomited everywhere in my room and badroom.

another time i got home but when i laid down naked on my bed to sleep the world started spinning and i felt like i was going to puke, so i sat up for a second with the lights on to make the feeling go away. unfortunatly i fell asleep. a few hours later my dad woke up and when he walked past my room he saw that the light was still on. i guess he was rather surprised when he engtered my room to see what was going on.

the stupidest thing i did was probably going to work for 8 hours and then going to a party, without eating a lot. after 4 duvels i felt i could use some cocktails. 4 cocktails later i passed out and the people who organised it put me in a sleeping bag while they were cleaning up (amongst other things my puke). they tried to contact my parents but i didn't have any contact info on me.
around 8am they came to look for me. that sucked really hard for them, and for me when they made me feel very guilty (and when i had to go to work without eating and still puking twice there)
since that night i don't think i did anything worth mentioning here, so that's pretty good.

Would anything about me surprise you at this point?;)

Not much, no. ;)

In the morning, I'll post the horror story of "Rum and Pills" and a major trauma center ER on a busy Saturday night...

Almost beaten by BK's ER story! (BTW, this is the only good drinking story where I remain stone cold sober. That's part of the reason it's a horror story... :p )

Anyway, here's the horror story of "Rum and Pills" and a major trauma center ER on a busy Saturday night:

This was my junior year of college. I had these friends who were twin sisters - T. and G. T. was the "responsible" one and G. was, shall we say, less responsible.

About seven o'clock on a Saturday night, T. called and invited me over for some videos. When I arrived, G. was out. T. said she'd gone to a party over at the quad dorms.

Everything was going swimmingly until about nine thirty, when the phone rang. The side of the conversation I heard went something like this:

"Hello. Yes, this is she. Excuse me? Pardon me? Why do you want to know? WHAT!?!"

She looked at me and said her sister had been taken to Ben Taub hospital. For those who don't know, Ben Taub is one of the busiest trauma centers in the US.

After a bit of discussion, the caller wasn't really willing to fill her in on the details, and wanted her to come downstairs. So I accompanied her. It was the campus police, with the friend from the quad who's party G. had been too. We got a scetchy version of the details.

At the party, they'd been playing quarters, with shots of rum. G. was a totally inexperienced drinker, and went way over the top. The friend decided he'd take her home. Halfway accross campus, she passed out, and he panicked and called the campus cops. By the time they got there, she in and out of consciousness. They wanted to drop her off at the dorm to sleep it off. But being in a drunken panic, he insisted they call an ambulance. Because the only ID she had on her was her campus ID, she was taken to Ben Taub (no proof of insurance).

And that's when the cops had called. We went back upstairs and called the hospital, who could only tell us that yes a person had been admitted under that name, and that we should come down immediately.

When we got there, at about ten thirty, it was, as you might imagine, chaos. We had trouble finding anyone to help us. Finally a priest noticed T. (who was now in tears) and helped us out. He went and looked up G. When he came back, he told us she'd been admitted as an OD and we could come back at two am to check up on her.

We went back to the dorm, called their parents, and waited.

At two, we were back at the waiting room. T. was able to go in and see her sister and talk to the docs. She came back pissed off.

It turns out that in the ambulance, G. had still been in and out of consciousness. When the paramedic asked her what she'd taken, she said "Rum." Then she remembered some aspirin she'd taken that morning , and added "...and pills."

So she got taken in as an OD, and had the same sort of treatment as BK. The doctor was none too happy when the lab results showed that the "pills" were aspirin.

No real horror stories, just some mildly amusing ones.

One night, I did 100 shots of beer in 100, with about half a dozen friends. During the course of the game we all spewed, most of us just ran into the back yard because it was closer. It was a pretty ordinary sight the next morning though, to watch our dogs fighting over our half digested spaghetti bolognese.

After a massive night on the Guinness, I woke up about 3am with the certain knowledge that I had to vomit. I jumped out of bed, startling the dog (she liked to sleep next to my bed). She got confused, baulked in the doorway & tripped me over. I was on my hands & knees, desparately trying to shovel her out the door, when the most foul smelling black torrent came gushing out. My poor dog was totally covered in the most disgusting vomit I've ever produced. She was standing there looking wretched, with an expression that said "What have I done to deserve this godawful punishment?". It got worse for her when I took her outside in the cold, dark night & hosed her down with icy water. I felt very sorry for her.

I gave a friend a pot of beer, laced with a shot of aftershave (Blue Stratos in fact). He skulled it straight down, so didn't notice the smell/taste until he'd finished. He spent the rest of the night bringing up his guts & hasn't yet forgiven me (it was about 12 years ago). We're still really good friends, but whenever we have a few drinks together, he has a go at me for the aftershave cocktail I administered.

oo, where to begin? i once passed out and fell on a smouldering bonfire. i have fallen out of several trees, once into the path of speeding car. i once threw a stick at a car for no reason at all only discover as it got nearer that it was a police car, so i ran off and hid for several hours. i have woken up in several hedgerows where i decided to rest on the walk home from parties or nights out. i got kicked out of a club three times in one night, once for being involved in a ruckus, twice for falling asleep on the dancefloor, then went missing for 3 or 4 hours as i had walked the wrong direction out of the club before my friends could catch up with em; by the time i made it home my jeans were ripped to shreds and i was covered in mud, vaguely remember climbing a fence into someone's garden and trying to sleep under a bush. after a free bar at a staff party i got kicked out of a nightclub twice for being wasted then wandered off through town winding up getting arrested for kicking up a fuss with a bouncer, a night in a cell and charges for assault and breach of the peace followed (recently overturned). that's about it i think. can't remember anything else just now apart from the usual puking in funny places, but if i listed all the places i've barffed from drinking we'd be here all day.

How many guys have woken up in jail for trying to enter the wrong house to pass out? :p

EDIT: And I'm starting to think that Kiv started this thread for the sole purpose of dragging this story outta me...

KILL YOU, KIV! LOLI have an uncle who was arrested for attempted rape when he entered the wrong house on an Air Force base and passed out on top of a woman. Charges were later dropped.

I'm fairly well a n00b for General posting, so forgive me if this has been done before.

Looking for people's worst drinking stories. Anytime you woke up in a strange city with a hangover the size of Texas and don't speak the local language would definitely count. Me, I've never had anything quite that bad occur, but there have been some doozies.

A few years back, on the weekend of my now-common-law-wife's birthday, I decided to teach her and another friend of ours how to play a card drinking game....and lost. Over and over and over again. Didn't help that she was drinking a mild liquer, our friend was drinking a rum cooler, and I was drinking Sambuca, straight. Needless to say, I ended up on the rough end of that deal. My own fault for teaching them how to play so well, I guess.

I've got a few more, at least one more involving sambuca (the evil mistress ramazotti), but I want to hear yours.

What have you got?
The only time I ever had a drink--one shot of wiskey--I promptly fainted, fell down a flight of stairs and shattered my right leg against the wall. I was lucky; had I fallen just slightly differently, I'd have smashed my head against the wall instead and possibly killed myself.

I have an uncle who was arrested for attempted rape when he entered the wrong house on an Air Force base and passed out on top of a woman. Charges were later dropped.

Cluich, I think that beats B&E with intent to sleep.:p

The only time I ever had a drink--one shot of wiskey--I promptly fainted, fell down a flight of stairs and shattered my right leg against the wall. I was lucky; had I fallen just slightly differently, I'd have smashed my head against the wall instead and possibly killed myself.

That is probably about as bad of a first experience you can have without illegalities or fatalities occuring.

I'm fairly well a n00b for General posting, so forgive me if this has been done before.

Looking for people's worst drinking stories. Anytime you woke up in a strange city with a hangover the size of Texas and don't speak the local language would definitely count. Me, I've never had anything quite that bad occur, but there have been some doozies.

A few years back, on the weekend of my now-common-law-wife's birthday, I decided to teach her and another friend of ours how to play a card drinking game....and lost. Over and over and over again. Didn't help that she was drinking a mild liquer, our friend was drinking a rum cooler, and I was drinking Sambuca, straight. Needless to say, I ended up on the rough end of that deal. My own fault for teaching them how to play so well, I guess.

I've got a few more, at least one more involving sambuca (the evil mistress ramazotti), but I want to hear yours.

What have you got?
Jägermeister.

I cannot begin to describe the evil.

I have never been so explosively puking drunk before (or since).

I don't drink or smoke or any of that on which you crazy kids do nowadays. But my Ex did very badly beat my friend when us three went out once. She was stone drunk, and I honestly did not know what was going on in her mind. Thankfully my friend was nice enough not to press any form of assault upon her.

A quote I came across today that is oddly appropriate for the subject.

"I can’t think of anything worse after a night of drinking than
waking up next to someone and not being able to remember their
name, or how you met, or why they’re dead."
---Laura Kightlinger

A quote I came across today that is oddly appropriate for the subject.

"I can’t think of anything worse after a night of drinking than
waking up next to someone and not being able to remember their
name, or how you met, or why they’re dead."
---Laura Kightlinger

well that cover some things

Well, there's a tie here for me. First time I drank, I became convinced a young lady I was with was just as into me as I was into her. Groping ensued. Surprised the hell out of her, it turns out. Lucky for me she was chill, since she was on the rugby and wrestling teams for our school. Been kind of ashamed ever since, and much more careful around liquor.

And one time when I was not careful around liquor: some buddies and I were at a bar. 2$ highballs, which I took full advantage of. Had some shots that (to this day) I wish I could remember the name of. Something with pineapple, I think. Anyways, I was having a grand time until being reminded of a young lady (absent.... very, very absent) who had temporarily slipped my mind.

So reminded, I had a great deal more to drink. Ended in me being kicked out of the bar, throwing up beside the public trains (and, incidentally, a bunch of times in the bar washroom), and being walked home by my one buddy because the rest didn't trust me to get home in one piece.

Awright. Giggity giggity.

This title should have been named - Drinking Stories: The Amazing Stupid Shit We Do that We Would Never Tell Our Moms About, But Will Brag About it on NSG!

This title should have been named - Drinking Stories: The Amazing Stupid Shit We Do that We Would Never Tell Our Moms About, But Will Brag About it on NSG!

Totally.

This title should have been named - Drinking Stories: The Amazing Stupid Shit We Do that We Would Never Tell Our Moms About, But Will Brag About it on NSG!

my mum knows what i did she had to came back to save the teenages

my mum knows what i did she had to came back to save the teenages

Just because she knows doesn't mean you would have necessarily told her...

Just because she knows doesn't mean you would have necessarily told her...

no i would not have told her i got pissed
hey i went to bed and one of them was a dumass to throw water in to my face
they got what got

no i would not have told her i got pissed
hey i went to bed and one of them was a dumass to throw water in to my face
they got what got
Nothing like a 'refreshing' glass of water. ;)

Nothing like a 'refreshing' glass of water. ;)

not to them,they end up with a nut
now they are scard to see me near drink

not to them,they end up with a nut
now they are scard to see me near drink
'Near'? So, if you look at it, they call in the bomb squad and evacuate the area? :p

'Near'? So, if you look at it, they call in the bomb squad and evacuate the area? :p

if they could, i say they would :D