NationStates Jolt Archive

I don't often go to the internet for major life decisions, but I've been looking for some different perspectives for this one:

I'm a high school senior whose lived in Brooklyn New York all of my life. I attend a very high pressure school; one of the top high schools in the U.S, apparently. Earlier this school year, I suffered alittle bit of a breakdown and didn't go to school for a week and a little, just because. I've been attending the school since seventh grade, so this is my sixth year, and I have made many good friends there, even if I am struggling to keep my composure with all of the stress and pressure that the school (both the administration and the students) place upon me. Generally, I am not a high stress, high pressure kind of person, but I've been getting better since my breakdown.

My family owns a small house in a town on the Hudson river that we bought a couple of years ago for a studio for my father and a future home for my parents for when I graduate high school. They are planning to move up after I graduate. However, in light of my troubles at school, they offered me the option of moving up now, and finishing my year at a local high school up there.

In a way, I would love to move to the house upstate. I like having a real bedroom, and windows (I sleep in a sometimes cockroach infested basement room). I love having a yard, and green outside my house. I can learn to drive upstate, which is something I can't do in the city. I feel so much more relaxed whenever I go up for the weekend, the house is so pleasant and I can feel my troubles seep out of me. I like the town and the surrounding area aesthetically; it's a gorgeous place.

However, I there are things that I would miss like crazy about living in Brooklyn. My friends, both at my school and in my neighborhood, for one. I could still see them, as we would keep the apartment for awhile, and I could go back to the city on weekends, or invite them upstate, but still, some of these people are people that I've lived next to for my whole life, and it would suck to be away from them. There is also a ton more freedom where I live than I can invision upstate. I'm a subway ride away from so many things, it's really amazing the things that I can do in this city.

Thanks for reading my rant, any suggestions or comments? Describing "normal" high schools might be very helpful, I have no idea what to expect from the school upstate. I really want to read different perspectives into the pros and cons of moving. Thanks.

What are your future plans? Do you plan to go to a high pressure college? Have you been accepted in college already?

heh...bearing in mind I went from an AP student to a drop out (ang got into college anyway)- your high school friends are about to scatter to the four winds. I talk to 1 in 20 of mine at all. if you like the environment better upstate...move. none of your friends are going to stay behind for you once college starts.

that said...who in their right minds would move OUT of NYC??? haha...I've spent the last 6 months saving to get back up there....

and a few words of advice. high pressure school is not worth it unless you're going into medicine. of you take out a loan, do it for grad-school. community or public college is a much better expierience, in my mind, than private schools full of snobs - and much more informative.

What are your future plans? Do you plan to go to a high pressure college? Have you been accepted in college already?

I'm in the college aplication process and I'm looking for more low pressure and far away colleges. I'm pretty sure I'm going to take a year off after high school, I'm pretty young for a senior and I don't think Im mature enough to take full advantage of whatever college I attend yet. Nothing is set in stone yet.

The apartment in Brooklyn which has skyrocketed in price over the last few years is probably going to pay for my education.

I'm in the college aplication process and I'm looking for more low pressure and far away colleges. I'm pretty sure I'm going to take a year off after high school, I'm pretty young for a senior and I don't think Im mature enough to take full advantage of whatever college I attend yet. Nothing is set in stone yet.

The apartment in Brooklyn which has skyrocketed in price over the last few years is probably going to pay for my education.Ah. In that case, I'd suggest moving. The only reason (I can see) to stay is if the new school is significantly worse than the one you're currently in.

I'm in the college aplication process and I'm looking for more low pressure and far away colleges. I'm pretty sure I'm going to take a year off after high school, I'm pretty young for a senior and I don't think Im mature enough to take full advantage of whatever college I attend yet. Nothing is set in stone yet.

The apartment in Brooklyn which has skyrocketed in price over the last few years is probably going to pay for my education.

the fact you say that actually makes you sound way more mature than most college freshmen. low pressure is good! it's the same history/math/science/language/whatever weither you learn it in your underwear off wikipedia or in a suit from a pompous, overpaid professor.

it depends on how you are mentally right now.

you have, in essence, half a year left. it would suck to go to a new highschool for the last half of your senior year. you dont have time to make close friends and youll have a diploma from a school that means nothing to you. its not like there is NO stress involved in going to a new school.

if you are mentally strong, i would stay in brooklyn. if you are headed for another breakdown, move upstate.

even if you stay in brooklyn, drop as many of the high pressure classes as you can. coast as much as possible. youll have more fun and be more mentally ready for college in the fall.

it depends on how you are mentally right now.

you have, in essence, half a year left. it would suck to go to a new highschool for the last half of your senior year. you dont have time to make close friends and youll have a diploma from a school that means nothing to you. its not like there is NO stress involved in going to a new school.

if you are mentally strong, i would stay in brooklyn. if you are headed for another breakdown, move upstate.

even if you stay in brooklyn, drop as many of the high pressure classes as you can. coast as much as possible. youll have more fun and be more mentally ready for college in the fall.

Well one of the problems is Im in three AP courses, a course at a local college, and James Joycess Ulysses, which is harder than all of the other courses combined. It's hard to drop courses at my school.
Some days I feel good, somedays I can barely get myself up in the morning to do anything. I'm a partial insomniac, which seems to be cured whenever I'm upstate. It's very up and down mentally, I'm a teenager after all.

Also, what do kids do not in a city? Do they actually hang out at malls? When I'm upstate I just relax, I don't know what other kids do for fun.

Also, what do kids do not in a city? Do they actually hang out at malls? When I'm upstate I just relax, I don't know what other kids do for fun.

Heh, I thought it was rather funny that you assumed there'd be a mall nearby. If the town is big enough to have a mall I consider it a city.

I grew up in a rather small town (9,000 people and no mall within 50 miles) and we'd usually just hang out at friends' houses and play videogames, paintball, etc.

Well one of the problems is Im in three AP courses, a course at a local college, and James Joycess Ulysses, which is harder than all of the other courses combined. It's hard to drop courses at my school.
Some days I feel good, somedays I can barely get myself up in the morning to do anything. I'm a partial insomniac, which seems to be cured whenever I'm upstate. It's very up and down mentally, I'm a teenager after all.

Also, what do kids do not in a city? Do they actually hang out at malls? When I'm upstate I just relax, I don't know what other kids do for fun.

fuck your school. go to your councillor and lay it on the line. if you have to, go to the school psychologist and get him on your side. theyll change your schedule. if they still give you a ration of shit, threaten to sue. they'll do something. your parents are your best allies in this.

theres the thing. do you have any friends upstate? without friends, its going to be hard to have any social life. you might find a similar minded friend or 2 that you can hang out with and do whatever it is that they do for fun. if you need to be a member of a crowd, its pretty hard to fit in in the last semester of highschool.

although, as vegan said, youre going to be on your own soon enough. as soon as highschool is over, your friends scatter. if you are going to follow your parents upstate when they move, you might consider moving now as building toward that year off from school. take a light load, get an afterschool job that you can justify continuing after graduation. live a totally different life than the one you are living now.

Don't move. Going to a good school is a privilege, it would be selfish of you to drop out when there are so many others elsewhere who would rather have your place. Someone somewhere and viewed you worthy of that education, and the least you can do is see it untill the end.

Don't move. Going to a good school is a privilege, it would be selfish of you to drop out when there are so many others elsewhere who would rather have your place. Someone somewhere and viewed you worthy of that education, and the least you can do is see it untill the end.

Is it better to finish somewhere else with good grades, or drop out from a prestigious school with your grades in the toilet?

Don't guilt someone for thinking that leaving might be the best idea because someone else would have wanted the spot -- if it's not right for him and it is going to cause more mental stress and academic difficulty, then that should be the ONLY consideration.

(teacher here, for those of you who forgot.)

threaten to sue.
This has to be the worst advice in the thread. Threatening legal action over problems that have nothing to do with legality is incredibly dumb. Threats like that turn reactions from "What can I do to help this guy find his way?" to "OK, fuck him. He's playing the legal card. Out the door with him."

Bad advice, Ashmoria. Bad.

finish school. But when your done, go upstate. Its beautiful up there.

This has to be the worst advice in the thread. Threatening legal action over problems that have nothing to do with legality is incredibly dumb. Threats like that turn reactions from "What can I do to help this guy find his way?" to "OK, fuck him. He's playing the legal card. Out the door with him."

Bad advice, Ashmoria. Bad.
I cant find where she said this. Is it an inside joke I don't know about?

Is it better to finish somewhere else with good grades, or drop out from a prestigious school with your grades in the toilet?

Don't guilt someone for thinking that leaving might be the best idea because someone else would have wanted the spot -- if it's not right for him and it is going to cause more mental stress and academic difficulty, then that should be the ONLY consideration.

(teacher here, for those of you who forgot.)

It's better to finish a prestigious school with alright grades than to finish an alright school with good grades. It may not be right, but prestige still counts for something in this world.