NationStates Jolt Archive

Some naked dude was spotted lying on a tree stump and masturbating by a Bay Area Rapid Transit station. Now here's the weird part. He had a sharp six inch awl stuffed into his ass. He's been charged with possession of a concealed weapon.

You would think that if you're on parole from prison you'd refrain from appearing naked in public and masturbating out in the open. You would think that anybody would refrain from stuffing six inches of sharp steel into his own ass. So what do you think, is this guy a criminal or just crazy?


http://cbs5.com/local/local_story_307192756.html

A new use for your ass, concealing a dangerous weapon when naked. Nature's pocket indeed.



'Make sure he doesn't pick your pocket'

So what do you think, is this guy a criminal or just crazy?

Neither, he's my new hero and role model. I am impressed.

He is both a criminal and crazy. Remember he's out on parole, so he must be a convicted criminal. I'm wondering whether the masturbating in public thing is in breach of his parole terms...

This is wrong on so many levels.

This is wrong on so many levels.
For once, this is actually true.

Crazy? Sounds like he were just plain horny.

Some naked dude was spotted lying on a tree stump and masturbating by a Bay Area Rapid Transit station. Now here's the weird part. He had a sharp six inch awl stuffed into his ass. He's been charged with possession of a concealed weapon.

You would think that if you're on parole from prison you'd refrain from appearing naked in public and masturbating out in the open. You would think that anybody would refrain from stuffing six inches of sharp steel into his own ass. So what do you think, is this guy a criminal or just crazy?


http://cbs5.com/local/local_story_307192756.html

Maybe someone in jail was paying him to get arrested and smuggle the awl into jail so they could excape, or maybe the dude is just crazy. Who knows, who cares?

Maybe someone in jail was paying him to get arrested and smuggle the awl into jail so they could excape, or maybe the dude is just crazy. Who knows, who cares?



thats actually not that far off?....but six inchs, damn!

Neither, he's my new hero and role model. I am impressed.
Hah! This is indeed my favourite story of the week. Thanks Drunk Commies!

Wow. His ass came in pretty handy... :rolleyes:

Presumably the awl was visible since he was masturbating. So how can it be considered concealed?

A new use for your ass, concealing a dangerous weapon when naked. Nature's pocket indeed.



'Make sure he doesn't pick your pocket'

Futurama references FTW.

Presumably the awl was visible since he was masturbating. So how can it be considered concealed?

Hearing this really makes me wish he wants to challenge the charges. I want to see this trial so much.

I was at a prison last night, and they have this chair which is designed to recognize pieces of metal hidden in your body. Apparently, this guy wasn't the first to think of using his rear as a repository for potential weapons. How frightening is that?!

Hearing this really makes me wish he wants to challenge the charges. I want to see this trial so much.

Presumably you'd get some interesting photographic evidence, anyway.

Some naked dude was spotted lying on a tree stump and masturbating by a Bay Area Rapid Transit station. Now here's the weird part. He had a sharp six inch awl stuffed into his ass. He's been charged with possession of a concealed weapon.

You would think that if you're on parole from prison you'd refrain from appearing naked in public and masturbating out in the open. You would think that anybody would refrain from stuffing six inches of sharp steel into his own ass. So what do you think, is this guy a criminal or just crazy?


http://cbs5.com/local/local_story_307192756.html

The stuff up his ass isn't as weird as you might think at first. It's a masturbation technique designed to stimulate the prostate and drastically increase the level of orgasm.

However, considering his choice of impliment and his choice of locale, methinks the guy is just crazy.

Only in America.

Only in America.

http://i12.tinypic.com/4dbnps3.jpg

Ah yes, Don King. His quotables have served me well.

Neither, he's my new hero and role model. I am impressed.

Why is he your hero?

Presumably the awl was visible since he was masturbating. So how can it be considered concealed?

:confused: :confused: :confused:

Hearing this really makes me wish he wants to challenge the charges. I want to see this trial so much.

Maybe Court TV will run the trial.

:confused: :confused: :confused:

6 inches of awl in one mans anus. I can't see it all going in...not while he's lying on a tree stump, masturbating.

The stuff up his ass isn't as weird as you might think at first. It's a masturbation technique designed to stimulate the prostate and drastically increase the level of orgasm.

However, considering his choice of impliment and his choice of locale, methinks the guy is just crazy.

I want nothing, absolutely nothing up my rectum when I have an orgasm. I don't even like the doctors finger up there when he does the old prostrate check, and if they didn't put me into lala land for the old colon scope, well...

In New York City, the guy would've been doing it right on the subway and all anybody would do would be change cars. :p

Poor guy. He was just out, enjoying the weather and taking a load off his...mind. How would any of YOU like it if you were interrupted while you were masturbating in public? Did he at least get to finish?

Poor guy. :(

on the topic of sticking things into ones anus I thought that this might be of some related interest, its quite inspiring and poignant

BME: When did you first realize that your ass could be the source of pleasure?

While watching porno films I saw women getting dick in their ass all the time and they seemed to like it a lot, so I thought I'd give it a try.

BME: What was it like the first time you stuck anything in your ass?

I was about twenty at the time the first time I tried it. The first time -- actually most of the first year -- I took no pleasure from it. But, I knew that the porn stars seemed to enjoy it, so I stuck at it and grew to love it as well.

BME: Why did you start putting larger objects in?

I saw gay films where men who were taking whole arms up their ass were getting pleasure from it. I learned to take pleasure from stretching my ass, and the wider I opened it, the more pleasure I took.

BME: How quickly were you able to move up to bigger items? Do you have a training regime?

It took me about two years to be able to take a wine bottle, and four years to take a 32cm ball. Recently I've been able to take a big ball, much bigger than the bottle. To pass that level I had to first train my ass with bigger bottles, like 1.5L pop bottles. There were a number of painful sessions with a lot of blood and ass-hurt for about four days after each session.

Because I am not comfortable writing in English, I will tell you my personal method in French.

BME: Thanks, I'll do my best to translate it for the readers. (Note: The following answer was translated by BME -- I apologize for errors in the translation.)

When I first started, I was using small bottles of shampoo. After that, I tried small apples, and then bigger ones. At this point I'd put a year of stretching in, and bought myself a large dildo.

My method was to dilate my ass as often as I could -- every day, even if just for a short while. Before starting it's important to use a large dildo; use it to both warm up and clean your ass, so make sure you stick it up all the way. When you find that you can take this large dildo without any work-up or preparation, then you know that you're ready to take it to the next step.

Then, in each session, to get your bottom prepared, put in a big cucumber. Soon you'll arrive at a point where even the biggest cucumbers you can buy at the grocery fit easily in your ass. Now you're ready to get serious. Buy a small Coke bottle, and use that in your ass. When that passes in and out easily, move on to bottles of wine. Once you can take wine bottles easily, you can move on to even bigger things.

If at this point you're having trouble with the 1.5L Coke bottle (just try not to force it out because the bottle is very hard), you can also have slower stretching fun with candles. Try putting them in one by one and seeing how many you can fit in -- at this time I was putting in about fifteen at the same time. The candles are great because they allow your anus to stretch very slowly.

Once the 1.5L Coke bottle can enter your ass, train every day or two (use a large dildo first, then the bottle every session). Most of the time I use Vaseline, but don't do what I do in this case. I think that the best lubricants are the ones you can buy for this in a sex shop.

When the 1.5L bottle is passing easily, go out and buy plastic balls that start at a diameter a little bigger than the bottle. Play with those, and with time, and a little luck, you'll arrive at my level too. (Don't feel bad if you're just beginning -- when I first started, I could barely shove a finger in my ass).

What I'm going to tell you now is very important if you plan on doing extreme sessions and taking large gauge. Do not bandage your ass. Do not tighten your buttocks. Try not to get an erecection -- you want the blood to be in your ass lips, not in your cock. It's not easy, but it's important that you think of nothing and empty your mind. It's absolutely necessary that you concentrate on your breathing. Don't think of the pain; know that it will pass. The real secret though is to breath -- and remember, without the pain, it's IMPOSSIBLE TO TAKE THE BIG ONES!

BME: What does it feel like? Is it sort of like getting fucked by a really well hung guy?

I want to make it very clear that I'm not gay -- I LOVE WOMEN!

BME: I'm sorry -- I imagine people must make this mistake all the time?

All the time, yes. Frankly I'm getting fed up with it.

BME: But you didn't tell me you'd gotten the idea for the bigger play from watching gay porn?

Yes, but the gay aspect never aroused me -- just the ass part. The films only helped show me that men enjoyed anal play as much as the women did.

I just want to find a woman who wants to play fisting with me (to fist me, or to let me fist her). I'm searching for one or two or more women to join me in my play -- I want them to stretch my ass with four hands at the same time while my body is supported. If there are any French women reading this, please write me -- it's my dream to do this performance.

Back to your earlier question, playing with a very large object feels a lot like having to take a shit very urgently. Even though you feel like you need to shit, that's just your imagination, and you can get extreme enjoyment with your ass so full.

BME: Do you like the way your ass looks when it's all purple and blown out?

Not at all, I prefer it when my ass accepts the stretching without any damage.

BME: Have you ever bled from the bigger objects?

Maybe eight or ten times I've had blood, but it was mostly because I didn't use enough lubricant.

BME: So... how big do you think you can go?

I'm looking for a bigger ball right now. I want to push my stretching as far as my body can physically support. I go slow though, because I never use drugs or anesthetics of any kind; I prefer feeling all the pleasure and the pain!

BME: What's the difference between pleasure and pain?

When I reach the limits of stretching, the pleasure and pain merge into the same feeling -- the pleasure this brings is amazing! Just two days ago I managed to put in a ball 37cm around (that's almost 15"). The feeling of pushing that out of my ass was indescribably pleasurable. Next time I do that I'm going to be sure to video tape it -- I'm sure I could probably even make money with that one!

BME: What are some of the objects you've stuck up your ass?

I've stuck up two big cucumbers at the same time, 1.5L and 2L Coke bottles, balls of all sizes, every size of wine bottle, lots of big butt plugs, etc.

I had a lot of trouble taking the 2L bottle because it doesn't fit in the ass gently. I can take a bigger ball, but a big rubber ball deforms to fit the shape of the ass -- it doesn't get smaller, but it's an easier fit.

BME: After a session, how long does it take for your ass to go back to normal?

Just five or six hours usually.

BME: Does it hurt afterwards?

No, not at all, but for the next few hours I can feel the ass's big lips.

BME: Are there permanent effects?

Yes -- my ass is bigger than ever!!!

BME: Do you need to wear a diaper? Does everything still work?

I'm not a baby!!! Everything is normal for me. All of the "anal destruction" I've done was done by me with care, and my ass is as normal as yours is... Although sometimes when I'm taking a crap it's huge because I've now got the capacity to really stock up. My digestion is trouble free though, and I've had no problems at all.

BME: What sorts of emails do you get from your fans?

Well, I don't know that many people online, but mostly admiration, asking for advice, and I've met a few other ass stretchers who've sent me pictures of their stretching.

BME: If someone wants to starting putting bigger things up their ass, how should they get started?

Take it slow. Start with little toys, and take your time growing your ass.

BME: Have you told any of your friends or sex partners about your ass play?

Oh, no! Up until now it's been TOP SECRET!

Why is he your hero?

He had a sharp six inch awl stuffed into his ass. Sure, I have had larger objects stuffed in mine, but those have always been relatively blunt.

I want to see Nancy Grace cover this.

He had a sharp six inch awl stuffed into his ass. Sure, I have had larger objects stuffed in mine, but those have always been relatively blunt.
I can imagine.

...didn't you leave NS for good?

I can imagine.

I bet you can.

...didn't you leave NS for good?

No.

I can imagine.

...didn't you leave NS for good?

Nobody leaves NS for good. Many have tried.