NationStates Jolt Archive

Clicky (http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/stories/18)

Have you ever wondered what ever happens to weapons that people curse or condemn to Hell once they are destroyed? Of course not, if you did you would immediately stop doing so. At least that's what a group of Navy chaplains are saying regarding the phrase "damn the torpedoes." Every time somebody does so a torpedo is condemned to go to Hell.

Now I know what some of you are thinking, that sending a torpedo to Hell is a good thing. That the all weapons should be subject to suffering. But guess again. Once a weapon is sent to Hell it will indeed be tortured and can even be used to torture others. However in the cases of explosive weapons they are doomed to be continuously exploded. That means that if the devil were to launch an invasion, they would have an infinite supply of explosive weapons. The demon torpedoes could destroy a target then reconstruct itself to go seek out another target.

Any other cursed weapon could also be sent to Hell to help arm the demon horde. Could you even imagine what it would be like to be shot by a cursed weapon?

Look, the point I'm trying to make is to stop sending the bloody weapons to hell by constantly cursing them. We're only doing ourselves in by doing so.

What the hell are you smoking... I want some:D

One Army chaplain explained his indifference thus:

"It's just not canon."
Love that part.

Would you rather bless the torpedoes and send them to heaven to blow up innocent angels?

Isn't Hell supposed to suck? :p

Yes, hell is supposed to suck. But do you really want to be arming the demons at the same time?

So when the Apocalypse comes, and there is the final war between Heaven and Hell, Hell will win because of humanity?

Yep, I can believe that...

Yes, hell is supposed to suck. But do you really want to be arming the demons at the same time?

I think we're safe. At least untill someone says, "damn a torpedo launcher".

:eek: oops! :eek:

So when the Apocalypse comes, and there is the final war between Heaven and Hell, Hell will win because of humanity?

Yep, I can believe that...

Yay humanity http://209.85.12.231/1424/192/emo/banana.gif

I think we're safe. At least untill someone says, "damn a torpedo launcher".

:eek: oops! :eek:

:eek: What have you done?!?!?!?!?!?!?! :p

I think we're safe. At least untill someone says, "damn a torpedo launcher".

:eek: oops! :eek:

What did you just do? :eek:

One Army chaplain explained his indifference thus: ...

I still have an entertaining vision of a military chaplain being asked to bless a M3A1 Satan tank back in WWII.

http://www.corazzati.it/lanciafiammeusa_fotobn.jpg

:eek: What have you done?!?!?!?!?!?!?! :p

What did you just do?

I... um... doomed us all. *blushes*

I... um... doomed us all. *blushes*

Thanks for that

So when the Apocalypse comes, and there is the final war between Heaven and Hell, Hell will win because of humanity?

Yep, I can believe that...

well given that god is suppposed to be omnipotent, therefore surely capable of winning by farting in the general direction of the devil, i think it's only fair that the hordes of hell be given a fighting chance.

Wouldn't most of the times people 'damn' a weapon be when they're mad at it for not functioning? Like "damn gun won't fire" or something.

Nah, there are people who curse guns in general all the time.

Oh, oh wait! Could we damn a supermassive black hole?

hell dont have nukes yet

I... um... doomed us all. *blushes*

Not quite. They still can't launch the explosive shells, seeing as they are always exploding. all they'll do is blow themselves (and the torpedo launchers) up.

Good thing the (literally) damned torpedos do not stay together long enough to be fired at people... or carried.

Clicky (http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/stories/18)

Have you ever wondered what ever happens to weapons that people curse or condemn to Hell once they are destroyed? Of course not, if you did you would immediately stop doing so. At least that's what a group of Navy chaplains are saying regarding the phrase "damn the torpedoes." Every time somebody does so a torpedo is condemned to go to Hell.

Now I know what some of you are thinking, that sending a torpedo to Hell is a good thing. That the all weapons should be subject to suffering. But guess again. Once a weapon is sent to Hell it will indeed be tortured and can even be used to torture others. However in the cases of explosive weapons they are doomed to be continuously exploded. That means that if the devil were to launch an invasion, they would have an infinite supply of explosive weapons. The demon torpedoes could destroy a target then reconstruct itself to go seek out another target.

Any other cursed weapon could also be sent to Hell to help arm the demon horde. Could you even imagine what it would be like to be shot by a cursed weapon?

Look, the point I'm trying to make is to stop sending the bloody weapons to hell by constantly cursing them. We're only doing ourselves in by doing so.
I was thinking about when that quote was first made by Whats his face at the battle of New Orleans(Or Summin) in the American Civil War...
They weren't actually what many people think of as being Torpedoes at all, but underwater mines.

He sent his ship into a minefield. :cool:

Thanks for that

I guess the kids in High School were right about my role in the end of the world. :(

hell dont have nukes yet
Really? How many people have damned nukes? Quite a few, I'd say.

I was thinking about when that quote was first made by Whats his face at the battle of New Orleans(Or Summin) in the American Civil War...
They weren't actually what many people think of as being Torpedoes at all, but underwater mines.

He sent his ship into a minefield. :cool:

John Paul Jones, War of 1812 actually. The rest is accurate though.

So we are talking about a submarine, armed with torpedos of the dammed, launching aformentioned hellpidios across a lake of fire, to blow something up, that is already blowing up.

Yup. I see your point. A total waist of ammo! If too many get dammed then somebody is going to have to answer to the Armed Services Commision. Those things are rather expensive you know. :eek:

Really? How many people have damned nukes? Quite a few, I'd say.

thank you for the bad news

thank you for the bad news

*evil grin* You're welcome.

*evil grin* You're welcome.

what your him
oh no he here posting in NSG :)

what your him
oh no he here posting in NSG :)

Sorry I'm not Satan. He was deated along time ago. I am just his evil replacement.

Sorry I'm not Satan. He was deated along time ago. I am just his evil replacement.

just as bad ;)

just as bad ;)

Actually worse, but who am I to brag?

*Just to avoid any confusion: I am not the old nation of Satan. We were contemporaries tho.*

Actually worse, but who am I to brag?

lot
now iam going to start daming soft things

dam pillows

dam blankets

Considring how many people have scheduled all sorts of fun events to happen when Hell freezes over, I damn liquid nitrogen!

lot
now iam going to start daming soft things

dam pillows

dam blankets

You'd be surprised the damage that can be done with pillows etc. *evil Grin become a chuckle*

Considring how many people have scheduled all sorts of fun events to happen when Hell freezes over, I damn liquid nitrogen!

w00t! the Hell Freezes over Icecapades. Coming soon to an apocalypse near you!

I was thinking about when that quote was first made by Whats his face at the battle of New Orleans(Or Summin) in the American Civil War...
They weren't actually what many people think of as being Torpedoes at all, but underwater mines.

He sent his ship into a minefield. :cool:

John Paul Jones, War of 1812 actually. The rest is accurate though.

:::bbuuuzzzz::: Wrong answer. Thank you for playing.

1) It's popularly attributed to Admiral David Farragut at the Battle of Mobile Bay.

http://www.bartleby.com/59/11/damnthetorpe.html

2) This version (like many other popular quotations) seems to be inaccurate.

Take, for example, "Damn the torpedoes! Full speed ahead," a rallying cry supposedly uttered by Farragut during the American Civil War battle of Mobile Bay on August 5, 1864.

According to Fred R. Shapiro, a Yale librarian and editor of "The Yale Book of Quotations," it was a comment either never said or at least never heard on the day of battle. The first appearance of a partial version of the phrase came in a book published in 1878 but reports from the day of the battle never mention the phrase.
http://today.reuters.com/news/articlenews.aspx?type=oddlyEnoughNews&storyID=2006-10-25T141127Z_01_N24206601_RTRUKOC_0_US-ARTS-QUOTATIONS.xml

:::bbuuuzzzz::: Wrong answer. Thank you for playing.

1) It's popularly attributed to Admiral David Farragut at the Battle of Mobile Bay.

http://www.bartleby.com/59/11/damnthetorpe.html

2) This version (like many other popular quotations) seems to be inaccurate.


http://today.reuters.com/news/articlenews.aspx?type=oddlyEnoughNews&storyID=2006-10-25T141127Z_01_N24206601_RTRUKOC_0_US-ARTS-QUOTATIONS.xml

Damn! The one thing I was awake for in history class turns out to be wrong. Just my damn luck.

Damn! The one thing I was awake for in history class turns out to be wrong. Just my damn luck.

Damn the history teachers? (Hell needs more of them...)

Damn the history teachers? (Hell needs more of them...)

Actually, damn being awake.

Damn! The one thing I was awake for in history class turns out to be wrong. Just my damn luck.

Considering John Paul Jones died in Paris 20 years before 1812 started...yeah. Unless he was part of the hushed-up "zombie fleet."