NationStates Jolt Archive

ok everyone, prepare for one of the most philosophically challenging dillemas of our age. i just found a tub of anne summer's 'pleasure gel' ("takes you to clit tingling heaven") with the lid off under one of my cushions by the sofa in my living room. my flatmate, who it obviously belongs to, doesn't come home til sunday evening, there's no way i could not notice it before then (i noticed it within an hour of returning home from work), what shall i do with it? it's currently on the coffee table just by where it was found with the lid about 2 metres away unmoved. (don't wish to touch this tub any more than necessary).

p.s. i need another bottle of wine now :(

I guess you could just hold on to it or get rid of it, and force them to broach the subject if you don't want to. After all, if neither party speaks of it it might as well not exist.

ok everyone, prepare for one of the most philosophically challenging dillemas of our age. i just found a tub of anne summer's 'pleasure gel' ("takes you to clit tingling heaven") with the lid off under one of my cushions by the sofa in my living room. my flatmate, who it obviously belongs to, doesn't come home til sunday evening, there's no way i could not notice it before then (i noticed it within an hour of returning home from work), what shall i do with it? it's currently on the coffee table just by where it was found with the lid about 2 metres away unmoved. (don't wish to touch this tub any more than necessary).

To avoid embarassment you should just bin it and never mention it.

On the other hand, this is a great opportunity for winding up your housemate.

To avoid embarassment you should just bin it and never mention it.

On the other hand, this is a great opportunity for winding up your housemate.

there's not much of it left. either it travelled from france or it was used a lot in the last 8 hours i was at work.

*is disturbed*

it's luminous green as well.

i'm just glad i can't see any stains on the sofa.

there's not much of it left. either it travelled from france or it was used a lot in the last 8 hours i was at work.

*is disturbed*

it's luminous green as well.

Just get rid of it...

*can't believe the OP did not state "for a Klondike bar"*

Well, presumably you can't use it, as you would have thought of thaat already. I say set up video cameras.

Well, presumably you can't use it, as you would have thought of thaat already. I say set up video cameras.

Technically, it hasn't been established yet that we would want to see the woman in question use this stuff.

Pictures plz.

*can't believe the OP did not state "for a Klondike bar"*

Well, presumably you can't use it, as you would have thought of thaat already. I say set up video cameras.

*is contemplatively wondering what a klondike bar is*

if i had a clit to use it on you can *almost* guarantee it would be used already.

*is not a voyeuar*

*doesn't know how to spell it for a start*

Technically, it hasn't been established yet that we would want to see the woman in question use this stuff.

Pictures plz.

the women in question has already been subjected to this forum. i don't know how to work the search function but i guess it can be used to find posts that old...

*is contemplatively wondering what a klondike bar is*

if i had a clit to use it on you can *almost* guarantee it would be used already.

*is not a voyeuar*

*doesn't know how to spell it for a start*

You don't have to watch it. The internet is for porn, no?

I guess it depends on how much you want to embarass your flatmate.

I have 4 ideas, each of them less socially acceptable than the previous.

*is contemplatively wondering what a klondike bar is*

Behold, the power and the glory, now and forever (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Klondike_bar)

the women in question has already been subjected to this forum. i don't know how to work the search function but i guess it can be used to find posts that old...

Well, resubject, eh?

I guess it depends on how much you want to embarass your flatmate.

I have 4 ideas, each of them less socially acceptable than the previous.

i'll hear all of them :D

i still don't get the choc ice reference.

*is somewhat sheltered*

ok everyone, prepare for one of the most philosophically challenging dillemas of our age. i just found a tub of anne summer's 'pleasure gel' ("takes you to clit tingling heaven") with the lid off under one of my cushions by the sofa in my living room. my flatmate, who it obviously belongs to, doesn't come home til sunday evening, there's no way i could not notice it before then (i noticed it within an hour of returning home from work), what shall i do with it? it's currently on the coffee table just by where it was found with the lid about 2 metres away unmoved. (don't wish to touch this tub any more than necessary).

If it works on clits it will work on whatever you've got!
Give it a try I say :)

If it works on clits it will work on whatever you've got!
Give it a try I say :)

Aye, we do have an equavalent body part...

If it works on clits it will work on whatever you've got!
Give it a try I say :)

i'm not sure i want to touch even the pakaging, let alone the goop inside.



shit, that's what i think of actual people too. i'm probably just a bit fucked up.

a) use some if it yourself
b) put it back where you found it
c) leave it on the table

I'd go with A. :)

i still don't get the choc ice reference.

*is somewhat sheltered*

"What would you do for a Klondike Bar" was a jingle used in commercials for the company. I actually haven't seen one in a while, but that's what they used to be.

"What would you do for a Klondike Bar" was a jingle used in commercials for the company. I actually haven't seen one in a while, but that's what they used to be.

ah, along the same lines as "kids'll do anything for dairylea (optional michael jackson referenence)" then?

ah, along the same lines as "kids'll do anything for dairylea (optional michael jackson referenence)" then?

Pretty much.

Thanks for the wiki entry. I had no idea what a "Klondike bar" was.
I'd imagined a drinking establishment full of identical women in overalls. :confused:

geez whats the problem?

put the cover on it. leave it on the table. when your flatmate comes back tell her that you never want to see and have to handle one of her intimate products again. im sure she'll comply.

geez whats the problem?
i'm afraid of confrontation...?

im sure she'll comply.

i'm sure she will but that's not really the point. i'd rather retain amicable relations above anything else. ever.

i'm sure she will but that's not really the point. i'd rather retain amicable relations above anything else. ever.

there is no need for it to be caustic.

all you really have to do is (put the cover on) leave it on the table. when she comes home you look at it then look at her. message given.

you are both adults, it no different than letting her know that you dont like used tissues or dirty panties left on the couch.

there is no need for it to be caustic.

all you really have to do is (put the cover on) leave it on the table. when she comes home you look at it then look at her. message given.

you are both adults, it no different than letting her know that you dont like used tissues or dirty panties left on the couch.

it is like that isn't it? especially opened. i'm not being overly prudish am i?

it is like that isn't it? especially opened. i'm not being overly prudish am i?

Maybe a tad bit. Or squeamish. Or something ish.

In addition to the look, I'd say give her a raised eyebrow and a grin. Possibly a snappy one-liner.

i'm sure she will but that's not really the point. i'd rather retain amicable relations above anything else. ever.

Well, pretend you don't know what it is. Like, put it in the fridge or something as if it was food.
If she leaves it out again, or puts it by your bed or something ... you might be getting a hint. Just maybe ;) Aw hell, you're getting a hint right now it sounds like.

If you're really sure you're not going to play, make sure she knows that or amicable relations are pretty unlikely in the future. "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" as the adage goes.

Well, pretend you don't know what it is. Like, put it in the fridge or something as if it was food.
If she leaves it out again, or puts it by your bed or something ... you might be getting a hint. Just maybe ;) Aw hell, you're getting a hint right now it sounds like.

If you're really sure you're not going to play, make sure she knows that or amicable relations are pretty unlikely in the future. "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" as the adage goes.

hah! i may be sheltered but i'm not stupid! and a girl with a gorgeous french boyfriend who she's completely besotted with is not going to even think of me like that! besides i wouldn't have agreed to live with her again if i hadn't already got over that particular infatuation.

Well, resubject, eh?

heh! all that'll happen then is you'll all tell me she's hot and that won't solve a thing! .... well not for me anyway.

What would I do?
I'd try it. Immediately.

What would I do?
I'd try it. Immediately.

it's smells like menthol chewing gum. and i don't know precisely where it's been.

*Is oddly disturbed by those who do not know what a Klondike bar is*

However, York Peppermint Patty's are by far supperior. I imagine I'm on a luge, rocketing at 100 miles an hour, with the air blowing threw my fface! WHOOOSH!
heh! all that'll happen then is you'll all tell me she's hot and that won't solve a thing! .... well not for me anyway.

Ah, but it would give us further insight on the situation.

And perhaps she is leaving hints as her boyfriend is... "lacking"... in certain areas, if ya catch my drift? I could go into a detailed explanation...

*Gets ready to Freud myself up*

it's smells like menthol chewing gum. and i don't know precisely where it's been.LOL
Okay, maybe not.

it's smells like menthol chewing gum. and i don't know precisely where it's been.

Taste test? That might help. And take a picture as you are doing it, for reference purposes.

it's smells like menthol chewing gum. and i don't know precisely where it's been.

I'll bet you have a pretty damned good idea. :D

Try it.

[breaks into chanting voice]

Try it! Try it! Try it!

*Is oddly disturbed by those who do not know what a Klondike bar is*

However, York Peppermint Patty's are by far supperior. I imagine I'm on a luge, rocketing at 100 miles an hour, with the air blowing threw my fface! WHOOOSH!


Ah, but it would give us further insight on the situation.

And perhaps she is leaving hints as her boyfriend is... "lacking"... in certain areas, if ya catch my drift? I could go into a detailed explanation...

*Gets ready to Freud myself up*

heh, i've seen (accidentally, well it was an accident for me cuz i looked up as he walked into the living room) him semi aroused in his boxers. didn't get my eye poked out but he certainly isn't 'lacking'.

I'll bet you have a pretty damned good idea. :D

i was trying not to think about it dammit! :p

Taste test? That might help. And take a picture as you are doing it, for reference purposes.

ewww!!!1

use it?

heh, i've seen (accidentally, well it was an accident for me cuz i looked up as he walked into the living room) him semi aroused in his boxers. didn't get my eye poked out but he certainly isn't 'lacking'.

Ah, then perhaps she prefers the plantain to the banana? The banana is satisfying, but the plantain is gratifying. Heh heh heh. This is fun.

heh, i've seen (accidentally, well it was an accident for me cuz i looked up as he walked into the living room) him semi aroused in his boxers. didn't get my eye poked out but he certainly isn't 'lacking'.

Not to sound terribly clichéd, but size really isn't everything.

There are other attributes which are far more important. Namely, those having to do with manual dexterity, and, ah, lingual finesse.

Not to sound terribly clichéd, but size really isn't everything.

There are other skills which are far more important. Namely, those having to do with manual dexterity, and, ah, oral finesse.

Not to mention being able to hit some the size of a pea(or smaller) with a banana, while completely blind as to where said pea is. Takes a good deal of skill.

Heh. Produce rules!

Oh, another good oneliner:

It's not the size of the boat, it's how you row. But it would take a helluva long time to get to England in a rowboat.

Not to sound terribly clichéd, but size really isn't everything.

There are other attributes which are far more important. Namely, those having to do with manual dexterity, and, ah, lingual finesse.
Manual dexterity. It's why I dated so many guitarists.:D

Not to sound terribly clichéd, but size really isn't everything.

There are other attributes which are far more important. Namely, those having to do with manual dexterity, and, ah, lingual finesse.

heh! don't worry, i'm not concerned about that, i was just responding factually and relevantly to the post i quoted.

to be honest i wouldn't be quite as pissed about this if i hadn't had to spend a whole waking week stuck in the living room with the tv or stereo turned up so i wouldn't hear them shagging. the mention of the penile eyeful was an extension (excuse the vague pun) of that ire.

Manual dexterity. It's why I dated so many guitarists.:D

hmm are guitarists actually better at that?... *wanders off trying to remember spanish guitar lessons*

Make a joke of it. Replace it in the sofa and place a few other toys next to it. See if she says anything about it.

Manual dexterity. It's why I dated so many guitarists.:D

Note to self: Learn to play the guitar.

Ever date a trombone player? If so, how do they compare? Out of curiosity.

Liberty EKB;11899871']Make a joke of it. Replace it in the sofa and place a few other toys next to it. See if she says anything about it.

heh, i like that the best! :D even if it is the expensive option.

heh, i like that the best! :D even if it is the expensive option.

Or you could fill some tissues with hair conditioner, and put it next to the bottle, which you will leave unopened.

That could work.

Note to self: Learn to play the guitar.

Ever date a trombone player? If so, how do they compare? Out of curiosity.

And the possibility of taking up trombone?

And the possibility of taking up trombone?

It's the only instrument I play, so thus is why I ask.

I have been told, however, that I'm an exceptional kisser. Perhaps it has to do with my strong lips from the workout of the good ol 'Bone...

Perhaps it has to do with my strong lips from the workout of the good ol 'Bone...

Hahahaha! That was awesome.

heh, i've seen (accidentally, well it was an accident for me cuz i looked up as he walked into the living room) him semi aroused in his boxers. didn't get my eye poked out but he certainly isn't 'lacking'.

:eek:

Not to sound terribly clichéd, but size really isn't everything.

There are other attributes which are far more important. Namely, those having to do with manual dexterity, and, ah, lingual finesse.

lol..."lingual finesse" - I'll have to remember that one.

I vote for putting it in the fridge, or possibly next to the shampoo in the shower. after trying it.

"not even herbal essences feels quite so fresh and tingly as this! I love what it does for my hair!! where do you buy this?"

and you know, she doesn't have to be unsatisfied with her frechmen to be hinting you...menage a trois anyone?;)

:fluffle::eek::fluffle::eek::fluffle::eek::fluffle:

:eek:



lol..."lingual finesse" - I'll have to remember that one.

I vote for putting it in the fridge. after trying it.

and you know, she doesn't have to be unsatisfied with her frechmen to be hinting you...menage a trois anyone?;)

:fluffle::eek::fluffle::eek::fluffle::eek::fluffle:

in a perfect world these fantacies might not be so absurd. fact is, i only know one person with as little guile as me and that's her. and, gorgeous as he is, i'm certainly not in to having a threesome with them even if they suggested it. that would creep me out.

in a perfect world these fantacies might not be so absurd. fact is, i only know one person with as little guile as me and that's her. and, gorgeous as he is, i'm certainly not in to having a threesome with them even if they suggested it. that would creep me out.

haha, I actually sincerely doubt she had anything of the sort in mind. I just had to say it, though. at least it wasn't your parents - my best friend found a huge carton of sex toys under his parent's bed...*shudder*

haha, I actually sincerely doubt she had anything of the sort in mind. I just had to say it, though. at least it wasn't your parents - my best friend found a huge carton of sex toys under his parent's bed...*shudder*

hahahaha! i'm glad my parents are seperated! although it might be worse to find such a thing now :eek:. *pukes behind furniture*

hahahaha! i'm glad my parents are seperated! although it might be worse to find such a thing now :eek:. *pukes behind furniture*

no kidding. I'm glad my parents think sex toys are sinful.

...

actually...no I'm not. I wish they were kinky. I have *absolutely* no desire to see or even know about that, but it might make them a bit more accepting towards gay people...

I'll bet you have a pretty damned good idea. :D

Try it.

[breaks into chanting voice]

Try it! Try it! Try it!

use it?

What would I do?
I'd try it. Immediately.

If it works on clits it will work on whatever you've got!
Give it a try I say :)

a) use some if it yourself
b) put it back where you found it
c) leave it on the table

I'd go with A. :)


results are in go for it big fella!!

geez whats the problem?

put the cover on it. leave it on the table. when your flatmate comes back tell her that you never want to see and have to handle one of her intimate products again. im sure she'll comply.

I agree 100%. That'll learn her to never leave her 'private bits' exposed again.

It's not your fault that she left it out to be found. Unless she wanted you to see it? Hmmmm?

I agree 100%. That'll learn her to never leave her 'private bits' exposed again.

It's not your fault that she left it out to be found. Unless she wanted you to see it? Hmmmm?

Meh, that's already been brought up, along with references to various skills in bed, fruit, mariners, and musicians.

That, and I let the secret slip that I'm a great kisser, according to first hand accounts. But that's beside the point.;)

Note to self: Learn to play the guitar.

Ever date a trombone player? If so, how do they compare? Out of curiosity.
Sax player. He had other skills.

haha, I actually sincerely doubt she had anything of the sort in mind. I just had to say it, though. at least it wasn't your parents - my best friend found a huge carton of sex toys under his parent's bed...*shudder*
I learned not to be snoopy when I was 14. Inot only found one of my step-mothers toys, but nude pictures of she and my dad. EEWWWW!!

Meh, that's already been brought up, along with references to various skills in bed, fruit, mariners, and musicians.

That, and I let the secret slip that I'm a great kisser, according to first hand accounts. But that's beside the point.;)

yeah, just don't get out of practice. happens to the best of us.


i've decided i'm just going to put the lid on it and leave it where it was. i'm beginning to think the cushion might have been a drunken attempt to hide the thing, so i not going to draw attention to it. it's probably better that she thinks i saw it but was uncurious about it and don't know what it is. that way she can be embarrassed if she wants or not. we'll probably have a good laugh about it next time we get drunk anyway.

yeah, just don't get out of practice. happens to the best of us.


Last time I kissed a girl was... wait for it... a year ago. I don't get out much.

However, I am told I give great backrubs. So I still have that going for me as a backup.

I'm hopeless, methinks.

And fine, if you want to be all nice about it, and not use it as a humorous volley, I suppose it's fine...

*grumbles*

i've decided i'm just going to put the lid on it and leave it where it was. i'm beginning to think the cushion might have been a drunken attempt to hide the thing, so i not going to draw attention to it. it's probably better that she thinks i saw it but was uncurious about it and don't know what it is. that way she can be embarrassed if she wants or not. we'll probably have a good laugh about it next time we get drunk anyway.

And pass up the opportunity for clit-tingling fun? You make baby jesus sad....

I learned not to be snoopy when I was 14. Inot only found one of my step-mothers toys, but nude pictures of she and my dad. EEWWWW!!

:( you have my sincere condolences.:(

And pass up the opportunity for clit-tingling fun? You make baby jesus sad....

baby jesus?, he makes me sad! :(

What would I do? I'd close it up & leave it on the table. When they got home, I'd say, "By the way, I capped your fucklube so it didn't dry out. I left it there because I don't know where you keep it."

Of course, anyone who has lived or will live with me of either gender would know that I wouldn't care. It doesn't squick me.

Rut it all over a tarp and slide down a hill.