NationStates Jolt Archive

It's true! No it's not - it's a satire.

Japan’s National Institute of Advanced Industrial Science and Technology debuts wanking machine

Finally. The wanking machine we've all demanded. The left hand is soft and cupped for your balls, the right hand has articulated fingers for shaft grip and/or anal stimulation. Perfect.

http://img247.imageshack.us/img247/4580/wankingmachinedc7.jpg

It'll be marketed on shopping channels as a shoulder massager for stressed businessmen.

Source. (http://www.idiottoys.com/2006/10/japans-national-institute-of-advanced.html)

I don't know about you, but I don't want to be jerked off by a masculine looking bulky robot.

I read this message and I thought sure Drunk Commies Deleted had posted it, but no.

I don't know about you, but I don't want to be jerked off by a masculine looking bulky robot.
Pretty much exactly what crossed my mind when I read it.

I'd rather not have my penis ripped off, thank you.

bit of a mare if it malfunctions...

Leave it to the Japanese to invent something wild and outrageous!

how I love the feeling of cold steel around my shaft.

Damn it, I thought this had to do with another step towards uploading our minds in to gigantic computers that can simulate an infinity of realities for us to be "born" in to.

Damn it, I thought this had to do with another step towards uploading our minds in to gigantic computers that can simulate an infinity of realities for us to be "born" in to.
C'mon, what do you expect from the people who perfected the art of games and anime?

I mean, they did develop Rez for Dreamcast...