NationStates Jolt Archive


Tesco stores help little girls get a head start on a lucrative career.

Drunk commies deleted
27-10-2006, 15:27
Parents are complaining about a toy sold in Tesco stores. It's a portable pole similar to the one dancers use at titty bars.

The £49.97 kit comprises a chrome pole extendable to 8ft 6ins, a 'sexy dance garter' and a DVD demonstrating suggestive dance moves.

So is this a disgusting violation of children's innocence or is it just a great way to get girls started in a future career?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=412195&in_page_id=17
Monkeypimp
27-10-2006, 15:30
I can see why they're upset. How can a girl get a good grip to flip upside down on a pole like that? They needs something solid. "Unleash the sex kitten inside.." indeed..
Khadgar
27-10-2006, 15:32
Heh.. That's funny, what's next? The Paris Hilton Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset?
I V Stalin
27-10-2006, 15:33
And this (http://www.guardian.co.uk/g2/story/0,,1930619,00.html) is why I read the Guardian and not the Daily Mail. Note the sarcastic tone and lack of outrage in the Guardian's story as opposed to the Mail.

"This should only be available to the most depraved people who want to corrupt their children."
Surely it should be made available to anyone who wants to corrupt their kids?
Iztatepopotla
27-10-2006, 15:34
"Now you can be just like mom!!! Entertain your daddies just like she does Thursdays through Tuesdays!!!"
Cluichstan
27-10-2006, 15:34
DCD, I've gotta wonder about your search terms on news sites. First, the teenage girls dressed as Captain Underpants, and now this? :eek:
Andaluciae
27-10-2006, 15:40
And amazing fake money!
Laerod
27-10-2006, 15:41
Not that I want to sound prude, but that seriously doesn't belong in the toys section...:p
Iztatepopotla
27-10-2006, 15:42
Shouldn't there be something for boys too? Like how to be a pimp?
The Gallifrey Republic
27-10-2006, 15:43
Heh.. That's funny, what's next? The Paris Hilton Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset?

Stupid Spoiled Whore video playset, show the whole world what a slut you are!
Nadkor
27-10-2006, 15:43
As far as I'm aware it's only for those over the age of consent. Not "little girls"

Good old Daily Mail....never let the facts get in the way of sensationalism
Baratstan
27-10-2006, 15:44
It seems poledancing over here is starting to be encouraged as an innocent means of keeping fit and a more serious form of dancing. Did you hear about that woman who was offering poledancing lessons to girls about 10 years old?
LiberationFrequency
27-10-2006, 15:45
Shouldn't there be something for boys too? Like how to be a pimp?

The have Rap CDs, does that count?
Laerod
27-10-2006, 15:46
As far as I'm aware it's only for those over the age of consent. Not "little girls"

Good old Daily Mail....never let the facts get in the way of sensationalismBut it was advertised in the toy section.
Drunk commies deleted
27-10-2006, 15:46
Stripper pole exercise video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msdefvqjK1A
Laerod
27-10-2006, 15:47
Shouldn't there be something for boys too? Like how to be a pimp?Does it come with a cane, a big feather hat, and fake jewelry? :D
Drunk commies deleted
27-10-2006, 15:51
Does it come with a cane, a big feather hat, and fake jewelry? :D

http://www.zoogstercostumes.com/landing/pimp.php?source=Google-PimpCostumes
Demented Hamsters
27-10-2006, 18:05
"I'm no prude"
really?
http://img.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2006/10/poledance_228x433.jpg
Then why have you got a face like someone's just welded your fanny shut?
Daemonocracy
27-10-2006, 18:24
yeah i saw this earlier. As if there weren't enough pedophiles in the world.

when is Nickelodeon releasing their instructional video of little girls gone wild?
Cluichstan
27-10-2006, 18:28
Then why have you got a face like someone's just welded your fanny shut?

Yeah, cuz you can really know everything about a person simply by looking at her face. Nice going, ignoramus. :rolleyes:
IL Ruffino
27-10-2006, 18:29
I want one!
Khadgar
27-10-2006, 18:47
What kind of warped motherfucker would buy that for their kids anyway?
Drunk commies deleted
27-10-2006, 18:48
What kind of warped motherfucker would buy that for their kids anyway?

Well, if she hates school and she's probably going to end up pole dancing anyway you can get it for her and help her prepare for her career. She can show off what she's learned at the next school talent show or family reunion
Free Soviets
27-10-2006, 18:57
so how is this expandable pole not going to just fall over when some kid swings around on it?
Szanth
27-10-2006, 18:59
so how is this expandable pole not going to just fall over when some kid swings around on it?

Maybe it's a sick joke to keep kids from getting on poles because they'll keep falling on this one.
Poliwanacraca
27-10-2006, 19:03
And BHS and others came under fire for selling padded bras embellished with a "Little Miss Naughty" logo and t-shirts with a Playboy-style bunny that said "I love boys...They are stupid."

The heck? I've seen that t-shirt. It does not feature a "Playboy-style bunny." It features "Happy Bunny."

Playboy bunny:

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/9/96/Playboy_logo_png.png

Happy Bunny:

http://www.blackjackinc.com/ProductImages/ihb/stickers/ihb_iloveboys_sticker_s.gif

You couldn't really confuse one of those with the other, now could you?
Bitchkitten
27-10-2006, 19:03
That's just... insane.
Smunkeeville
27-10-2006, 19:05
The heck? I've seen that t-shirt. It does not feature a "Playboy-style bunny." It features "Happy Bunny."

Playboy bunny:

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/9/96/Playboy_logo_png.png

Happy Bunny:

http://www.blackjackinc.com/ProductImages/ihb/stickers/ihb_iloveboys_sticker_s.gif

You couldn't really confuse one of those with the other, now could you?

hey! I have a happy bunny shirt, someone bought it for me....it says "not listening" :)
Szanth
27-10-2006, 19:08
hey! I have a happy bunny shirt, someone bought it for me....it says "not listening" :)

We demand pictures of you modeling it! :p
Smunkeeville
27-10-2006, 19:09
We demand pictures of you modeling it! :p

no way. it's pretty cute though happy bunny has it's little happy bunny hands over it's little happy bunny ears.....so very cute.

it's a sweatshirt.
Poliwanacraca
27-10-2006, 19:12
hey! I have a happy bunny shirt, someone bought it for me....it says "not listening" :)

I have one, too - mine features Happy Bunny in a straightjacket, and says "cute but psycho." :)
Free Soviets
27-10-2006, 19:12
Maybe it's a sick joke to keep kids from getting on poles because they'll keep falling on this one.

but think of the liability!
Smunkeeville
27-10-2006, 19:13
I have one, too - mine features Happy Bunny in a straightjacket, and says "cute but psycho." :)

http://us.st11.yimg.com/us.st.yimg.com/I/villagestreetwear_1918_297775327

yep, there it is....see? very cute.
Drunk commies deleted
27-10-2006, 19:13
but think of the liability!

What are the odds that "think of the liability" was posted before "think of the children" on this thread?
Angry Fruit Salad
27-10-2006, 19:17
This doesn't shock me --- I saw the damn thing in Spencer's Gifts, right next to the vibrators, about a year ago.

I'm tempted to ask my fiance for one for Christmas..
Free Soviets
27-10-2006, 19:22
What are the odds that "think of the liability" was posted before "think of the children" on this thread?

i think it was sort of paraphrased earlier. but swinging around on poles is fun for all ages - though markedly less so when the pole just falls over when you try it. if i was gonna sell portable stripper poles, i'd be damned worried about getting sued if that happened. and this looks to me like an expandable shower rod that happens to come with some ridiculous accessories, at best.
Gauthier
27-10-2006, 19:24
Nice to see companies are still encouraging little girls to turn into overdressed and overprecocious Jon-Benet Ramseys.

Not.
Drunk commies deleted
27-10-2006, 19:27
Nice to see companies are still encouraging little girls to turn into overdressed and overprecocious Jon-Benet Ramseys.

Not.

Actually I think in this case they're encouraging them to be underdressed.
Qwystyria
27-10-2006, 19:33
Stupid Spoiled Whore video playset, show the whole world what a slut you are!

Complete with webcam and paypal startup information...
Daemonocracy
27-10-2006, 20:13
Stripper pole exercise video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msdefvqjK1A



Then again, starting them young could prevent injuries in the future...(click) (http://www.break.com/index/soyouthinkyoucandance.html)
Ultraviolent Radiation
27-10-2006, 21:32
Big deal. A home pole dancing thing got put in the kid's section due to an administrative mishap. It must be a sign of the apocalypse.
JuNii
27-10-2006, 21:50
He added: "Children are being encouraged to dance round a pole which is interpreted in the adult world as a phallic symbol.

I wonder if they still dance around the Maypole...


Seriously.. that is F*%ked up... really F*%ked up...
Ifreann
27-10-2006, 22:21
i think it was sort of paraphrased earlier. but swinging around on poles is fun for all ages - though markedly less so when the pole just falls over when you try it. if i was gonna sell portable stripper poles, i'd be damned worried about getting sued if that happened. and this looks to me like an expandable shower rod that happens to come with some ridiculous accessories, at best.

I agree. Tescos should be required to give those poor girls a proper replacement stripper pole. Won't someone think of the children?!
Yootopia
27-10-2006, 23:30
Shouldn't there be something for boys too? Like how to be a pimp?
Fo' shizzle!

"Hey boys - something new for christmas - the 'Tap Dat Ass' playset!

It comes with a purple suit suitable for 8-11 year olds, and a matching purple hat, with a non-allergy feather!

Also comes with instructional videos including the correct method to lift a girl's bra strap suggestively without snapping it, and authentic drive-by dodging training videos!

Just 69.99 at a store near you!

Don't play it like a sucka, get pimpin', mutha fucka!"
Myrmidonisia
27-10-2006, 23:36
Inappropriate, yes. But whether or not to purchase one of these things is a parent's decision. Or the store manager. Or the store buyer. If we, acting as the state, are allowed to decide that this is inappropriate and should be banned, where is the final line drawn on what is or is not appropriate for kids to play with?

I say toy machine guns and Barbie dolls.
Drunk commies deleted
27-10-2006, 23:38
Inappropriate, yes. But whether or not to purchase one of these things is a parent's decision. Or the store manager. Or the store buyer. If we, acting as the state, are allowed to decide that this is inappropriate and should be banned, where is the final line drawn on what is or is not appropriate for kids to play with?

I say toy machine guns and Barbie dolls.

I say real machine guns and prostitutes. You should have to be an adult for those things.
Free Soviets
27-10-2006, 23:40
Won't someone think of the children?!

indeed. safety first, you bastards. everyone knows that a pole has to be properly secured in order to be functional. that does not consist of wedging it against the ceiling.
Drunk commies deleted
27-10-2006, 23:45
indeed. safety first, you bastards. everyone knows that a pole has to be properly secured in order to be functional. that does not consist of wedging it against the ceiling.

Actually it does. Hustler Hollywood stores sell the Lil' Mynx brand of stripper poles for Adults and the kit comes with a friction ceiling mount if you don't want to bolt it in. They're sturdy enough for adults and good enough quality for Hustler.
Ifreann
27-10-2006, 23:49
Fo' shizzle!

"Hey boys - something new for christmas - the 'Tap Dat Ass' playset!

It comes with a purple suit suitable for 8-11 year olds, and a matching purple hat, with a non-allergy feather!

Also comes with instructional videos including the correct method to lift a girl's bra strap suggestively without snapping it, and authentic drive-by dodging training videos!

Just 69.99 at a store near you!

Don't play it like a sucka, get pimpin', mutha fucka!"

I approve of the above post.
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y239/NuGo1988/word.jpg
Yootopia
27-10-2006, 23:50
I approve of the above post.
Niggaz fo' life, RIP 2Pac etc.
Free Soviets
28-10-2006, 00:08
and good enough quality for Hustler.

someday, that will take over for underwriters laboratories as the standard in product testing
Free Soviets
28-10-2006, 00:22
Actually it does. Hustler Hollywood stores sell the Lil' Mynx brand of stripper poles for Adults and the kit comes with a friction ceiling mount if you don't want to bolt it in.

according to http://www.lilmynx.com/dancepoles.php there are two mounts. the hardcore one bolts in to a joist (and is disguised as a plant hook - classy as hell), while the friction one "cannot withstand as large a side load as the bolted mount". aka, you go swinging from that too much and it might just fall over. and i assume it's friction mount is higher quality than the lil' tykes stripper pole's.
Kradlumania
28-10-2006, 10:41
Big deal. A home pole dancing thing got put in the kid's section due to an administrative mishap. It must be a sign of the apocalypse.

Yeah, but rabid fools won't let a little bit of common sense get in the way of a good story.

On the otherhand, one for the boys - "Elite Operations Role Play Set: Police" (http://www.kwtx.com/home/headlines/4491681.html), mo'fo.
Le Franada
28-10-2006, 11:20
Eh, I have seen people bring their toddlers into Ann Summers with them. Granted, they probably wouldn't understand as much as an 11 year-old, but that has to be awkward if they ask questions. "Mummy, what do you need a whip for?"

I don't think this "toy" was meant to be targeted to 11-year olds but to people 16 and older. You see worse things than that on High Street in shop windows in most UK cities. If it bothers you so much, don't buy it.
Ardee Street
28-10-2006, 11:33
This is outrageous... why can't these unscrupulous capitalists leave families alone??? Well done to the Guardian for pointing the fact out:

sod piano lessons - the Peekaboo pole-dancing kit will prepare your little angel for the real world, where capitalism reigns supreme and a woman can get anything she wants, so long as she's wearing a sexy garter and knows how to writhe around a chrome pole.
Yootopia
28-10-2006, 11:55
This is outrageous... why can't these unscrupulous capitalists leave families alone??? Well done to the Guardian for pointing the fact out:
You might also want to realise that The Guardian points out that it was meant for those aged sixteen and over. The Mail does not, because it's a reactionary rag.
Hamilay
28-10-2006, 11:57
He added: "Children are being encouraged to dance round a pole which is interpreted in the adult world as a phallic symbol.
... WTF? Poles as phallic symbols? Firemen are depraved now?
I V Stalin
28-10-2006, 11:58
You might also want to realise that The Guardian points out that it was meant for those aged sixteen and over. The Mail does not, because it's a reactionary rag.
How dare you sully the names of Britain's reactionary rags! The Sun and the Mirror will be taking you to court soon, you mark my words. The Mail is nothing better than bog roll. Bog roll, I say! :)
Becket court
28-10-2006, 12:06
You might also want to realise that The Guardian points out that it was meant for those aged sixteen and over. The Mail does not, because it's a reactionary rag.

It is in the toy section, and so far I see no evidence that the Tesco's staff would stop it being sold to someone under 16
I V Stalin
28-10-2006, 12:12
It is in the toy section, and so far I see no evidence that the Tesco's staff would stop it being sold to someone under 16
So far I see no evidence that Tesco's staff wouldn't stop it being sold to someone under 16.
Yootopia
28-10-2006, 12:28
How dare you sully the names of Britain's reactionary rags! The Sun and the Mirror will be taking you to court soon, you mark my words. The Mail is nothing better than bog roll. Bog roll, I say! :)
Ach, but it would make poor bog-roll for the ink might run, leaving black skidmarks. Which would be very sad.
I V Stalin
28-10-2006, 12:31
Ach, but it would make poor bog-roll for the ink might run, leaving black skidmarks. Which would be very sad.
I seem to recall hearing that the Daily Mail uses ink that doesn't smear - and that they were using this as part of an advertising campaign...

I guess nobody buys it for the news.
Yootopia
28-10-2006, 12:32
I seem to recall hearing that the Daily Mail uses ink that doesn't smear - and that they were using this as part of an advertising campaign...

I guess nobody buys it for the news.
Maybe they just buy it for the calligraphy, then, perchance?

Who knows?
Cannot think of a name
28-10-2006, 13:01
really?
http://img.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2006/10/poledance_228x433.jpg
Then why have you got a face like someone's just welded your fanny shut?

I was thinking something similar. Also, wha-?
...This should only be available to the most depraved people who want to corrupt their children."

They get their own store or something?
Yootopia
28-10-2006, 14:07
They get their own store or something?
Yes, "The Adult Shoppe", which only opens 8pm-2am.
Ardee Street
28-10-2006, 15:24
You might also want to realise that The Guardian points out that it was meant for those aged sixteen and over. The Mail does not, because it's a reactionary rag.
Oh right OK, I have no problem with adults buying this.
Yootopia
28-10-2006, 15:34
Oh right OK, I have no problem with adults buying this.
Excellento.
Free Soviets
28-10-2006, 17:52
... WTF? Poles as phallic symbols? Firemen are depraved now?

it's worse than that even. fire hoses, man, fire hoses.