New story
Darknovae
07-10-2006, 02:04
Here's my new story. (http://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1165212)
Enjoy and discuss. ;)
Warning: Natalie Greene is a made-up character. And this story is weird. Don't sayI didn't warn you.
Liberated New Ireland
07-10-2006, 02:17
Sorry, but... meh.
Twizzlers Rule
07-10-2006, 02:22
wow... I do that all the time in like science class, i start thinkin' about all this stuff and it all relates back to the same subject. like when im doing something and i'm thinking about how if i do something else how ironic it would be, and then it happens, and it is even more ironic cuz i was thinking about how it would be so ironic and then it happens and that makes it even more ironic and when you think about it more it makes you feel like something is going to happen and its gonna be really ironic, and then it all happens and you feel like you have to pee.
Darknovae
07-10-2006, 02:24
wow... I do that all the time in like science class, i start thinkin' about all this stuff and it all relates back to the same subject. like when im doing something and i'm thinking about how if i do something else how ironic it would be, and then it happens, and it is even more ironic cuz i was thinking about how it would be so ironic and then it happens and that makes it even more ironic and when you think about it more it makes you feel like something is going to happen and its gonna be really ironic, and then it all happens and you feel like you have to pee.
Wow... there's more people with ADD than I thought. :eek: I'm not alone! :D
Grainne Ni Malley
07-10-2006, 02:30
My only constructive criticism, without digging into typos and such, is to use the word "sucks" a little less frequently. Otherwise, keep writing and have fun with it.
Wanderjar
07-10-2006, 06:50
Well......its not my type of story. I'll leave it at that.
No offense intended :)
Kiryu-shi
07-10-2006, 07:05
That story is ok, i guess.
Did you ever write that witch story?
Here's my new story. (http://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1165212)
Enjoy and discuss. ;)
Warning: Natalie Greene is a made-up character. And this story is weird. Don't sayI didn't warn you.
interesting... but I really have no taste for first person stories... sorry. :(