NationStates Jolt Archive

Ok, we all know the interwebs is full of strange stuff... but sometimes it will still surprise you. When doing some research on period pain today, I came across this :

http://us.st11.yimg.com/us.st.yimg.com/I/flat-d_1915_1522000

Looks harmless, doesn't it? Well, here's what it does:

Here is the item you have been looking for!
The Flatulence Deodorizer - Reusable is an activated charcoal cloth pad that is worn taped inside the underwear next to the buttocks. The wearer is virtually unaware of its presence because it thin and comfortable, and you insert it inside the undergarment or panties.
The activated carbon cloth pad is washable and reusable.
You can get several weeks use out of a single pad, depending on usage.

http://www.flat-d.com/flatdreusable.html

I know most of you came across similarly odd products, and I know you can't wait to share.... :D

Ok, we all know the interwebs is full of strange stuff... but sometimes it will still surprise you. When doing some research on period pain today, I came across this :

http://us.st11.yimg.com/us.st.yimg.com/I/flat-d_1915_1522000

Looks harmless, doesn't it? Well, here's what it does:



http://www.flat-d.com/flatdreusable.html

I know most of you came across similarly odd products, and I know you can't wait to share.... :D

I've heard of that one. They have a charcoal-filtered pillow, too, that's 99% effective. I heard the underwear is only about 25% effective.

I've heard of that one. They have a charcoal-filtered pillow, too, that's 99% effective. I heard the underwear is only about 25% effective.

Oh, dear. Someone mistranslated "Kissenfurzer", it would seem :D

http://www.coloplast.de/ECompany/DEMed/Homepage.nsf/(VIEWDOCSBYID)/174349F2980D3D92C1256F3900288C39

yeh, it's an anal tampon. :eek:

http://www.coloplast.de/ECompany/DEMed/Homepage.nsf/(VIEWDOCSBYID)/174349F2980D3D92C1256F3900288C39

yeh, it's an anal tampon. :eek:

Oh... my... *speechless* :eek:

http://www.coloplast.de/ECompany/DEMed/Homepage.nsf/(VIEWDOCSBYID)/174349F2980D3D92C1256F3900288C39

yeh, it's an anal tampon. :eek:

.... while I can imagine it being inserted... pulling it out...


eeewwwwwww!

.... while I can imagine it being inserted... pulling it out...


eeewwwwwww!

Ick, ick, ick and it's hours before I can leave and go take a shower! :eek:

Ick, ick, ick and it's hours before I can leave and go take a shower! :eek:

mwahahaha... i didn't even know they were real til i searched for them just now, i just heard about them. i think they're hilarious, lol

The "fleshlight" alway just made me...feel wierd inside thinking about people actually buying it and using it. Idk why.

Somehow that anal tampon reminds me of a South Park episode, though....

Somehow that anal tampon reminds me of a South Park episode, though....

It certainly sounds like something that would be in a South Park episode. And the guys at jackass would probably devote some air time to it.

How about an immortality device?

http://www.alexchiu.com/

And guess where I found that ;)

http://www.alexchiu.com/

Einstein invented E=mc² that fiend!

Einstein invented E=mc² that fiend!

If only he had invented teleportation as well

Teleportation must be invented. If we don't invent teleportation, China will throw nuclear bomb everywhere. Especially now everyone can live forever.

http://www.alexchiu.com/spacestation/teleport.htm

How about an immortality device?

http://www.alexchiu.com/

And guess where I found that ;)

He quotes a guy convicted of fraud. Gives me warm fuzzy feelings. . . .

forever! :p

http://www.flat-d.com/flatdreusable.html


That actually looks useful. I knew a guy back in high school who suffered from Irritable Bowel Syndrome. He could have used the heck out of that thing.

they make a Jackhammer Jesus, as well as a baby jesus butt plug. I would link or show a picture, but I'm pretty sure that would get me in trouble.

hangover pills, for when you don't want to give up partying, but you can't stand the headaches. Seriously, the headaches are your body's way of telling you to stop getting drunk. Why ignore your body? What has it ever done to you that you didn't tell it to?

hangover pills, for when you don't want to give up partying, but you can't stand the headaches. Seriously, the headaches are your body's way of telling you to stop getting drunk. Why ignore your body? What has it ever done to you that you didn't tell it to?

the annoying thing about them is you have to remember to take them before you start drinking when you're not even feeling ill yet.

hangover pills, for when you don't want to give up partying, but you can't stand the headaches. Seriously, the headaches are your body's way of telling you to stop getting drunk. Why ignore your body? What has it ever done to you that you didn't tell it to?

Never took any of those, but they do sound rather handy.

Hahaha, that alexchiu thing is hillarious! If you're looking for a bit of random insanity, look no further than their forum.Alex,

I just stumbled (Ha! Ha!) onto your website and was wondering if your "Super Chi Flush" will help regenerate my brain stem. I was involved in a horrific accident where a blunt impact to the base of my skull resulted in the pulpification of my brain stem. I can barely type this e-mail due to the absence of my brain stem. Will the Super Chi Flush help me, or should I simply consider the Power rings?

Thanks,
Hector

-------------------------
ANSWER: Chi Flush removes scar tissues. I think if you use Chi Flush enough time, some stem can be fixed. I am improving the Chi Flush formula all of the time. I am waiting to add extracts in Chi Flush to boost the effect.

http://www.coloplast.de/ECompany/DEMed/Homepage.nsf/(VIEWDOCSBYID)/174349F2980D3D92C1256F3900288C39

yeh, it's an anal tampon. :eek:


What the hell is it for?

An anal what-pon!? Dear God, that was one thing that I didn't never needed to know existed. :eek:

Noticed this on the Alex Chiu site.
So people who take Gorgeouspil don't want kids. (You still can have kids. But you just don't want one.) A person who takes Gorgeouspil likes to concentrate his soul within his own body and does not wish to scatter his soul on to other bodies. So making babies is not desirable for people who take Gorgeouspil. Gorgeouspil allows a person to achieve unlimited beauty and unlimited youth. Meanwhile, it stops humans from unnecessary reproductions of more human beings.
Heh... if that were real, it'd be slightly disturbing. Would anyone who wanted kids in the first place even bother to buy something that repressed that desire?

What the hell is it for?

Erm... what do you think it is for?

TimeCube. You're all educated stupid.

Erm... what do you think it is for?

To stop your bum from leaking?

To stop your bum from leaking?

Congratulations, you won our quiz.
May I present you with a lifetime supply of our most popular product, the anal tampon? Enjoy!


:D

Congratulations, you won our quiz.
May I present you with a lifetime supply of our most popular product, the anal tampon? Enjoy!


:D

Cool! Has anyone got a fleshlight that I can borrow? ;)

Erm... what do you think it is for?

Well, normal tampons are for absorbing menstrual flow. However, there is no menstrual flow in the anus/rectum... at least... I hope not...

I mean, the obvious answer would be that it's for absorbing shit... but I was under the impression that you got rid of your feces by pooping it out... why a tampon would be necessary or even the least bit beneficial I have no idea.

Well, normal tampons are for absorbing menstrual flow. However, there is no menstrual flow in the anus/rectum... at least... I hope not...

I mean, the obvious answer would be that it's for absorbing shit... but I was under the impression that you got rid of your feces by pooping it out... why a tampon would be necessary or even the least bit beneficial I have no idea.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fecal_incontinence

:p

oh dear....

The "fleshlight" alway just made me...feel wierd inside thinking about people actually buying it and using it. Idk why.

buying it....using it....then


Cleaning it? :p


it wrong....

Well, normal tampons are for absorbing menstrual flow. However, there is no menstrual flow in the anus/rectum... at least... I hope not...

I mean, the obvious answer would be that it's for absorbing shit... but I was under the impression that you got rid of your feces by pooping it out... why a tampon would be necessary or even the least bit beneficial I have no idea.

Maybe to stop it from making its grand exit at a time thats not convenient for you or your associates.

Maybe to stop it from making its grand exit at a time thats not convenient for you or your associates.You just gave me a mental image of someone trying to avoid farting during sex, and ending up shooting plastic pellets instead.

You lot wouldn't happen to know some handy product for washing one's brain, would you?

The weirdest thing I came across was a USB fondue set, but apparently, that doesn't exist afterall. ;)

Baby pattern baldness need not be a lifelong problem...

http://www.babytoupe.com/

Ok, we all know the interwebs is full of strange stuff... but sometimes it will still surprise you. When doing some research on period pain today, I came across this :

http://us.st11.yimg.com/us.st.yimg.com/I/flat-d_1915_1522000

Looks harmless, doesn't it? Well, here's what it does:



http://www.flat-d.com/flatdreusable.html

I know most of you came across similarly odd products, and I know you can't wait to share.... :D

But if my farts don't stink anymore how will I ever get a seat on the subway?

What the hell is it for?

tamponing your anus.......:confused: :confused:

Here's one that gives females the ability to pee standing up. (http://www.femalefreedom.ca/) I found it a little while ago.

I cant post a link to it, because theres nekkidness on the site.

However, its not actual human nekkidness.

Do a Google search on "Real Doll", only all one word, instead of two, like I just did.

Whats so wierd about a sex doll?

A pulse.

muscle contractions.

Body temperature.

a fully articulate skeleton.

Here's one that gives females the ability to pee standing up. (http://www.femalefreedom.ca/) I found it a little while ago.

My girlfriend says those are useful for backpacking trips (you know, when you piss behind trees and such).

I cant post a link to it, because theres nekkidness on the site.

However, its not actual human nekkidness.

Do a Google search on "Real Doll", only all one word, instead of two, like I just did.

Whats so wierd about a sex doll?

A pulse.

muscle contractions.

Body temperature.

a fully articulate skeleton.

oh my...

oh my...

yeah..pretty much.

TimeCube. You're all educated stupid.

I agree, because I am much dumber for having read Gene Ray's website.

How about an immortality device?

http://www.alexchiu.com/

And guess where I found that ;)

Alex Chiu? He is hilarious!


Now you must be saying, "Alex Chiu, this Chinaman, you're crazy!"
I like to speak German.
I have only one patent in hand which was issued in October 1999, which is the most important patent in the world! [Immortality]
But unluckily most Germans here are too smart. They all speak good English and won't be able to speak German to me.
I have studied Japanese for ten years. I have to admit Japanese people are very nice and thoughtful.
Lastly, I am proud to be an American. If I were born and raised in China, I would not have become an inventor for Chinese people don't have open minds.

I offer for your consideration the decapitatible barbie flash memory.

http://blog.wired.com/weirdusb/thumbnails/400x300/barbie.jpg

Duuuuuude.

I offer for your consideration the decapitatible barbie flash memory.

http://blog.wired.com/weirdusb/thumbnails/400x300/barbie.jpg
Where'd you find that? I want one!!!

Well, normal tampons are for absorbing menstrual flow. However, there is no menstrual flow in the anus/rectum... at least... I hope not...

I mean, the obvious answer would be that it's for absorbing shit... but I was under the impression that you got rid of your feces by pooping it out... why a tampon would be necessary or even the least bit beneficial I have no idea.

in the sanfran area of kali - maybe it is used to keep the gerbils in????

:eek:

I offer for your consideration the decapitatible barbie flash memory.

http://blog.wired.com/weirdusb/thumbnails/400x300/barbie.jpg

wonder where ken keeps his???

:(

wonder where ken keeps his???

:(

they call it RAM for a reason, ya'know.

Where'd you find that? I want one!!!


http://www.b3ta.com/board/4577623

Used 'Panties' Vending machines...

wonder where ken keeps his???

:(
The Whore dumped Ken awhile ago, she is now seeing an Australian Surfer dude...

How about an immortality device?

http://www.alexchiu.com/

And guess where I found that ;)

Wow, he's like, Oscar Wilde gone totally insane.

Wow, I'm dithering around on his website, and, uh, well, I came across this:

I was born in San Francisco in 1971. Since my parents were already talking about a divorce, right after my birth I was sent to Taiwan where my grand parents raised me up. I am not a Taiwanese. I am Chinese, and I wish China will one day take Taiwan back, peacefully or by force, at any cost! A Taiwanese who does not consider himself to be Chinese does not deserve to become immortal. So if that's you, my product is not for you. I only have an AS degree which I got in City College of San Francisco. After that, I worked for a few years and then filed a patent for Immortality Device. I practice Iching (Chinese astrology) and Chinese medicine. I worked for Japanese companies as sales and as a sushi chef for nearly 8 years before I started my own business. I have only one patent in hand which was issued in October 1999, which is the most important patent in the world! (immortality)

AaaaammmmmmaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaazing!

how about an adaptor that enables ducks to smoke? that would be useful.

how about an adaptor that enables ducks to smoke? that would be useful.

I can see so very many uses for that.