NationStates Jolt Archive

So, this is the question that all Y chromosomes want to know, but (to my knowledge) none has ever discovered: Why, why, oh why in the name of God do all females between the ages of 11 and 18 (and many others, but those especially) have an inability to use indoor plumbing in the absence of a companion?

I have asked literally dozens of girls about this. Some didn't know. Some gave honest but unsatisfactory replies. Mostly involving socializing. But why would you socialize while pooping? I just don't understand it.

Some of the answers I've gotten:

>So they don't miss out on the socializing that's going on
>Safety in numbers (yeah, because high school bathrooms are THAT scary)
>They spend most of the time primping anyway
>To make guys paranoid
>Girls have a greater tendency than guys towards interdependency
>Some sort of female bonding ritual :fluffle:
>To gossip

Others, too...

But that question still bothers me. Even if I stipulate that I am motivated by all those factors, I still can't see the bathroom as a major conversation spot.

Do any girls want to shed light on this? Do any guys want to commiserate with me?

I would normally do that when I wanted a word in private with the other girl. It can be very important to exchange opinions away from the group for a moment.

Bonding? Man, bathrooms sure need desegregation. Why should the guys have to drill holes just for some hardcore lesbian action? :( :mad: :fluffle:

I would normally do that when I wanted a word in private with the other girl. It can be very important to exchange opinions away from the group for a moment.
But why the bathroom? There are usually plenty of other places away from the group...

I'm male but I'm thinking its a logical place for women to gossip where men can't hear.

I'm male but I'm thinking its a logical place for women to gossip where men can't hear.
Yeah, that's certainly true in some instances. In other instances, Avika is listening through the hole he drilled...

It is done by some and not all women for the sole purpose of getting a male to bring it up as a generalised female behavior. The other females lurk in the background waiting until enough males point out and question this female behavior and then the Amazons leap out of the woodwork with claims of stereotyping and sexism aimed at the person who brooked the subject and any who agreed with him. I think it is some sort of behavior meant to keep men on their heels and confused about females..

But why the bathroom? There are usually plenty of other places away from the group...

Because it's a cnvenient excuse. You can hardly say "I'm going over there with her now to have a word alone, don't disturb us", can you? It would make the whole thing sound like a conspiracy

I'm so glad that my dorm has co-ed bathrooms. It eliminates a lot of the practice in question.

Desegregate all bathrooms.

I'm so glad that my dorm has co-ed bathrooms. It eliminates a lot of the practice in question.

Desegregate all bathrooms.

I have a friend in college in Co-ed Dorms. His dorm mate is an extremely attractive woman (Lucky sonofabitch!!!)

I stopped thinking about the reasons why a long time ago.

My usual reaction consists of a http://www.studip.uni-goettingen.de/pictures/smile/nixweiss.gif and the mumbled sentence "That's women for you."

I think it's because when somebody announces that they need to go, it makes me realise that I need to pee too. That's why I usually go to the bog with my girl friends.

I do have this one friend though, who insists that I go even when I don't need to.
Jenny: I'm going to the toilet.
Me: Okay, I'll wait for you.
Jenny: I'm going to the toilet. *Glares*
Me: *Sigh.* Alright, I'll come along too. *Get's up*

Btw, bathrooms are just called toilets here. I suppose it sounds a little weird to you lot across the pond. :p

:confused: I always go to the bathroom on my own...and I'm a girl.

In the guys toilets, talking is almost forbidden and you must never use the middle urinal. Whats with that?

In the guys toilets, talking is almost forbidden and you must never use the middle urinal. Whats with that?

In the ladies toilet you cant use the urinals at all.

It is done by some and not all women for the sole purpose of getting a male to bring it up as a generalised female behavior. The other females lurk in the background waiting until enough males point out and question this female behavior and then the Amazons leap out of the woodwork with claims of stereotyping and sexism aimed at the person who brooked the subject and any who agreed with him. I think it is some sort of behavior meant to keep men on their heels and confused about females..


Do you wimmin folx not understand that you don't need to do this, we are confussed enough already!

*sigh* wimmin and their whilley ways;)

In the ladies toilet you cant use the urinals at all.

what even thoose fancy urinals they have for ladies

In the guys toilets, talking is almost forbidden and you must never use the middle urinal. Whats with that?

The rule is, you have to stand as far away from eachother as possible. Hence the end ones are frequently used, and the middle one(s) rarely.

If you talk to someone, you usually look at them. It's considered poor form to look too closely whilst at the urinals, so as a consequence there's not much chatter.

In the guys toilets, talking is almost forbidden and you must never use the middle urinal. Whats with that?

Or that's just plain wrong. A lot of men don't want to talk whilst their dick is in their hand(at least not to another bloke) but if your in the bog with a mate it is not forbided to talk(just don't look)

In the guys toilets, talking is almost forbidden and you must never use the middle urinal. Whats with that?It's hard enough to aim without the distraction, surely that's common knowledge ;)

Yop
It reminds me of "happy day" and the boy's office, in the bathroom...
What's new dude?

Simple. Cos wimmins is kerazy.

what even thoose fancy urinals they have for ladies

Those are sinks!

I would normally do that when I wanted a word in private with the other girl. It can be very important to exchange opinions away from the group for a moment.

see... that thought's never, ever come into my head while i'm out in a social setting.

"come on dude, you're coming to the shitter with me so we can exchange opinions on people and things behind their back..." :confused:

see... that thought's never, ever come into my head while i'm out in a social setting.

"come on dude, you're coming to the shitter with me so we can exchange opinions on people and things behind their back..." :confused:

Men usually are more direct with things like that. If a dude's pissed AT ANOTHER dude, there will not be as much doubt.

At least that is my experience...

Men usually are more direct with things like that. If a dude's pissed AT ANOTHER dude, there will not be as much doubt.

At least that is my experience...

well yeah... i remember many girl-friends of mine who would say 'i hate hanging out with her cos i can't stand the bitch' (or words to that effect)... to which my reply would be to tell her she's a bitch and stop fucking hanging around with her then. simple! :rolleyes: :p

see... that thought's never, ever come into my head while i'm out in a social setting.

"come on dude, you're coming to the shitter with me so we can exchange opinions on people and things behind their back..." :confused:

We don't have to do that because women all go off and leave the men alone to exchange opinions.

We don't have to do that because women all go off and leave the men alone to exchange opinions.

lol true :p

even so, when people go to the bathroom, i've hardly noticed the peeps left round the table suddenly take up the opportunity to talk about them or whatever. in my experience, we just keep drinking ;)

lol true :p

even so, when people go to the bathroom, i've hardly noticed the peeps left round the table suddenly take up the opportunity to talk about them or whatever. in my experience, we just keep drinking ;)

It would take something very important to make people stop drinking.

I didn't read the thread so that my answer would be pure....

primary reason- to be able to talk in private with my friend (not around the guys)

secondary reasons- so that she can hold my stall door closed, so that she can fetch me TP from the other stall that is too dirty to squat in, so that I can loan her feminine products should she need them (or a quarter to get some), so that she can check my makeup, so that I can hold her door shut and fetch TP, so that we can leave the boys to talk about us in private and I can find out what the other guy says about me from my husband later. ;)

well yeah... i remember many girl-friends of mine who would say 'i hate hanging out with her cos i can't stand the bitch' (or words to that effect)... to which my reply would be to tell her she's a bitch and stop fucking hanging around with her then. simple! :rolleyes: :p

Ah, but sometimes you have to hang out with people you hate, because people you like want to hang out with them... social life for girls is a complex matter.

I didn't read the thread so that my answer would be pure....

primary reason- to be able to talk in private with my friend (not around the guys)

secondary reasons- so that she can hold my stall door closed, so that she can fetch me TP from the other stall that is too dirty to squat in, so that I can loan her feminine products should she need them (or a quarter to get some), so that she can check my makeup, so that I can hold her door shut and fetch TP, so that we can leave the boys to talk about us in private and I can find out what the other guy says about me from my husband later. ;)

All very good reasons. That's pretty much my answer, minus the bit about the husband. :p

Ah, but sometimes you have to hang out with people you hate, because people you like want to hang out with them... social life for girls is a complex matter.

very. They kept telling me that it would get better out of highschool, but it really hasn't.

very. They kept telling me that it would get better out of highschool, but it really hasn't.

It never will... and coping with it is one of the single most important lessons school teaches you.

Social pre-conditioning, protocol or an innate female instinct?

It is rather frustrating at times.....

I'm so glad that my dorm has co-ed bathrooms. It eliminates a lot of the practice in question.

Desegregate all bathrooms.

You attend school in the fantasies of a Japanese businessman?

It is done by some and not all women for the sole purpose of getting a male to bring it up as a generalised female behavior. The other females lurk in the background waiting until enough males point out and question this female behavior and then the Amazons leap out of the woodwork with claims of stereotyping and sexism aimed at the person who brooked the subject and any who agreed with him. I think it is some sort of behavior meant to keep men on their heels and confused about females..

Okay, who told Not Bad about this? :mad:

So, this is the question that all Y chromosomes want to know, but (to my knowledge) none has ever discovered: Why, why, oh why in the name of God do all females between the ages of 11 and 18 (and many others, but those especially) have an inability to use indoor plumbing in the absence of a companion?

I have asked literally dozens of girls about this. Some didn't know. Some gave honest but unsatisfactory replies. Mostly involving socializing. But why would you socialize while pooping? I just don't understand it.

Some of the answers I've gotten:

>So they don't miss out on the socializing that's going on
>Safety in numbers (yeah, because high school bathrooms are THAT scary)
>They spend most of the time primping anyway
>To make guys paranoid
>Girls have a greater tendency than guys towards interdependency
>Some sort of female bonding ritual :fluffle:
>To gossip

Others, too...

But that question still bothers me. Even if I stipulate that I am motivated by all those factors, I still can't see the bathroom as a major conversation spot.

Do any girls want to shed light on this? Do any guys want to commiserate with me?
I spent a number of years as a teenage female, and I never behaved as you described. None of my female friends did so. Some girls do the bathroom-herd thing, but most that I know of don't.

When I got older and started going to pubs, it became more common for me to go to the bathroom with a companion, but this was mostly for safety reasons (as we would usually be pretty well loaded as the night went on and it was nice to have somebody to keep you from drowning yourself in the sink or something).

If you find yourself hanging out with people, male or female, who do crazy or annoying things, perhaps you should ask yourself why you are so interested in hanging out with crazy/annoying people. If you find yourself dating girls who do things that you simply cannot understand, perhaps you should consider speaking to those girls and asking them to explain themselves. Most female teenagers are quite able and willing to speak for themselves, and you shouldn't be dating any girls who aren't.

Ah, but sometimes you have to hang out with people you hate, because people you like want to hang out with them... social life for girls is a complex matter.

see, I get the having to hang out with someone you dislike to see someone you like thing, but several girls I know act like best friends when they're around eachother. On the drive over, all I hear is "god she's such a bitch. I can't stand her. Do you know what she did to me twelve years ago?!"...we enter the door, and its giant hugs and "I love you"'s all around.

I've hung out with guys I don't like to see people I do. I either don't talk to them, or, if they don't seem to understand that I have no interest in enjoying their company, I make it blatantly clear in as few words as possible

In the guys toilets, talking is almost forbidden and you must never use the middle urinal. Whats with that?
No talking - because you're not in a position to talk, you're urinating, this is all.

Middle urinal - you will knock the others/barge them a bit and that equals piss on their / your trousers - not a good thing.

Ah, but sometimes you have to hang out with people you hate, because people you like want to hang out with them... social life for girls is a complex matter.Why not just cease all that mindless socializing and do something meaningful, like sitting in front of your computer all night? But then, perhaps the gossip-&-small-talk withdrawal would drive you insane...

There is a bar in Milwaulkee, called the "Safe House." A theme bar based on spies. The ladies room is on the second floor. (The men's and ladies rooms are on opposite sides of the bar each with an opposite but false door, that is next to the men's room is a false door - it doesn't open - marked ladies and vice versa for the ladies room.) The ladies room (so I've been told, I'm a guy and I can't personally vouch for it) had a one way mirror that allowed the ladies to look down from the sinks on the tables below ... so they could spy on their dates while their dates thought they were doing what ladies normally do in ladies rooms.

Note there is such a thing as "female urinals" developed for some outdoor events, but it's a complex thing and involves disposable funnels.

Meanwhile, there is a secret hidden in every men's room that fill ladies with fear and disgust. Yes, they are urinal cakes.

Or ice cubes. But that wierds out the guys as well.

My explanation would be thus:
For the girls who do ask others to go to the loo with them, it's often because they don't want to be seen as "loners".
And because it's become an expectation that "all girls go to bathrooms in pairs", if you do go alone, it's assumed you have no friend to go with you. Continuing the stupid habit, because most people don't want to be seen that way.

Just like with guys, if a guy asked a guy to go to the loo with them, they'd probably get strange looks.
It could be a perfectly normal thing, and there's nothing wrong with it in itself, but because it is accepted that "guys go to the loo alone", if they did ask, it seems like they must have a kinda creepy reason...

Because these habits are just expected, if they aren't followed, assumptions are made, so people are made to follow the expectations.



Anyhoo, calmness gone, this thread makes me want to scream.
Why, oh why, do people continually insist on grouping all of a gender together based on the similarity of their reproductive organs?? Why do I have to be grouped with some weird habits that some females follow, just because I have ovaries?

Personally, I don't give a damn about how I'm seen, and I'm perfectly comfortable going to the loo alone (probably moreso than when I have someone standing outside listening....). The only reason I'd ask is for safety reasons.

And I don't gossip or bitch - people know if I'm annoyed or don't like them. And I'm not interested in peoples' personal lives. If they're my friend, I care, and will be helping them and respecting any privacy they ask for. Otherwise... I'm just not interested. And if I have to hang around with someone I dislike... I'll deal with it, and I still won't go and bitch about them and then act all friendly. (Again, because this is accepted behaviour, when it should be discouraged, it continues...)

The females who do act like this, I really don't get.
Perhaps this is why I generally get on better with guys....

have you ever been in a womans bathroom?

i mangaed to get a look once, i was undercover as an operative. its like a lobby in there. they have chairs and sofas. and in some places the floor is even carpeted. its their very own lounge that they use to plot against us with the xy

I have a friend in college in Co-ed Dorms. His dorm mate is an extremely attractive woman (Lucky sonofabitch!!!)

Wow, even ours aren't that co-ed (males and females are often neighbors but not roommates). That would be cool by me, though I'd try to avoid becoming romantically involved with a female roommate, as it could lead to issues down the road if there was a break up.

In the guys toilets, talking is almost forbidden and you must never use the middle urinal. Whats with that?
That's not true, especially not the second point.

Okay, who told Not Bad about this? :mad:

Sorry Im sworn to secrecy about the source.;)

That's not true, especially not the second point.

I'm a guy, I know that you can't use the middle urinal at least in this culture.

Anyhoo, calmness gone, this thread makes me want to scream.
Why, oh why, do people continually insist on grouping all of a gender together based on the similarity of their reproductive organs?? Why do I have to be grouped with some weird habits that some females follow, just because I have ovaries?



.


See post 7;)

Yeah, sorry to Glitziness and Bottle (and I think one other) about the stereotyping. I know it's not an absolute trend, since I have met at least two girls who don't do it.

LiberationFrequency has a point. Unless the bathroom is really busy and all the other urinals are taken and you really have to go and there are no stalls available, one generally does not take the middle urinal. I suppose it's mostly because it feels weird to have your schlong out while the guys on either side of you do too.

If you find yourself hanging out with people, male or female, who do crazy or annoying things, perhaps you should ask yourself why you are so interested in hanging out with crazy/annoying people. If you find yourself dating girls who do things that you simply cannot understand, perhaps you should consider speaking to those girls and asking them to explain themselves. Most female teenagers are quite able and willing to speak for themselves, and you shouldn't be dating any girls who aren't.
It's not so much annoying as confounding. I'm annoyed by the fact that I can't understand it, but I've accepted for a long time that the inability to understand the opposite sex is a natural part of being human.

I'm perfectly aware, as well, that guys engage in many behaviors which are illogical in a roughly equivalent degree (most of those have to do with machismo).

I'm interested in hanging out with crazy people because I'm crazy. Everybody's crazy, at some level or another. I am just drawn to those who proclaim it loud and proud. And yes, I'm dating a girl who is quite willing to speak for herself. She probably gave me the most comprehensive assessment of the phenomenon out of any of the girls I've talked to about it.

My explanation would be thus:
For the girls who do ask others to go to the loo with them, it's often because they don't want to be seen as "loners".
And because it's become an expectation that "all girls go to bathrooms in pairs", if you do go alone, it's assumed you have no friend to go with you. Continuing the stupid habit, because most people don't want to be seen that way.

Just like with guys, if a guy asked a guy to go to the loo with them, they'd probably get strange looks.
It could be a perfectly normal thing, and there's nothing wrong with it in itself, but because it is accepted that "guys go to the loo alone", if they did ask, it seems like they must have a kinda creepy reason...

Because these habits are just expected, if they aren't followed, assumptions are made, so people are made to follow the expectations.



you already know i agree, but still... you make far too much sense ;) :D :fluffle:

I'm a guy, I know that you can't use the middle urinal at least in this culture.

I gotta agree. It's one of those unspoken "guy" rules...use the urinal closest to the wall. If those are both taken, leave one urinal between you and the next guy. Eyes ahead, either up at the celing, or down at your feet. Don't talk unless you are both in the same situation...ie, both on line, but don't talk if you can avoid it...angle your body away from the other person if there is no space between you and him

they aren't so much about being weird, its more out of courtesy...give each person his personal space. I don't want someone invading my space (male or female) while I'm going to the bathroom, so out of courtesy, I mind their space and my own.

No, I don't have to keep one urinal between me and the other person, but it is more polite, particularly if there aren't dividers between each.

In the last two years, I have only used a public bathroom once.

Couldn't tell you what the hell goes on in them..

There's this girl who goes to the bathroom at 12:30 everyday.. we wonder about her..

a men's room monolouge (http://www.malerestrooms.com/)
^ is so true, there is a link to one about female restrooms, but I can't vouch for it's veracity. (No porn, nothing bad said.)

Why, why, oh why in the name of God do all females between the ages of 11 and 18 (and many others, but those especially) have an inability to use indoor plumbing in the absence of a companion?

All girls? I'm 14 but I go alone. I read plenty of opinions written in the bathroom stalls. I don't have many girl friends to gossipo with anyways, and I hate gossip.

I've been trying to figure that out too...

girls travel in number to go to the bathroom because they need to gossip. theres no other reason to go with someone else

Meh pops and me...more him...have always wondered that. It may be a vestigial trait or something hardwired into them or a cultural adaption because of rapes and stuff. OR it may be a bit of both. Also two females together in a bathroom makes more sense than two males...but thats likely cultural...

Doors to women's bathrooms are several times heavier than those to men's bathrooms, so it takes several people to open them.

True fact.

Men need to band together more. We need to use our bathrooms as a collective meeting ground/staging area as well.

We could learn a lot from observing this female behaviour.

I will selflessly volunteer for a recon mission.

I'm a guy, I know that you can't use the middle urinal at least in this culture.
That's stupid and I've never found that. The middle urinal is there for a reason. I live in Ireland, though there are plenty of morons who won't respond to you when you're both pissing at urinals. And I say morons because you're probably a retard if pissing requires your full, undivided attention.

That's not true, especially not the second point.

Never, under ANY cirumstances is the middle urinal EVER to be used.

That's stupid and I've never found that. The middle urinal is there for a reason. I live in Ireland, though there are plenty of morons who won't respond to you when you're both pissing at urinals. And I say morons because you're probably a retard if pissing requires your full, undivided attention.

Frankly I feel uncomfortable discussing... hell... I can't even get a stream going if someone else is in the room.

Frankly I feel uncomfortable discussing... hell... I can't even get a stream going if someone else is in the room.
I used to be like that but I told that irrationol part of my brain to STFU and my bladder just got on with it.

That's stupid and I've never found that. The middle urinal is there for a reason. I live in Ireland, though there are plenty of morons who won't respond to you when you're both pissing at urinals. And I say morons because you're probably a retard if pissing requires your full, undivided attention.

its weird talking to someone else with your dick in your hand. simple as that...

So, this is the question that all Y chromosomes want to know, but (to my knowledge) none has ever discovered: Why, why, oh why in the name of God do all females between the ages of 11 and 18 (and many others, but those especially) have an inability to use indoor plumbing in the absence of a companion?

I have asked literally dozens of girls about this. Some didn't know. Some gave honest but unsatisfactory replies. Mostly involving socializing. But why would you socialize while pooping? I just don't understand it.

Some of the answers I've gotten:

>So they don't miss out on the socializing that's going on
>Safety in numbers (yeah, because high school bathrooms are THAT scary)
>They spend most of the time primping anyway
>To make guys paranoid
>Girls have a greater tendency than guys towards interdependency
>Some sort of female bonding ritual :fluffle:
>To gossip

Others, too...

But that question still bothers me. Even if I stipulate that I am motivated by all those factors, I still can't see the bathroom as a major conversation spot.

Do any girls want to shed light on this? Do any guys want to commiserate with me?

Hot girl on girl action. It may not be true, but it makes me feel better thinking it's true.

its weird talking to someone else with your dick in your hand. simple as that...
No it's not. You're so repressed... it's just a dick, it's not like you're doing something gay/sexual with it, and it's not like you're looking at his or vice-versa.

When guys go into bathrooms and socialize alot, it's seen as an act of homosexuality. Few men want to be seen as having the sexuality they don't have, particularly straight men desperate for female, um, "hugging". Yes, hugging. >.> <.< hugging. That's what we want.

It's cultural, mostly. It's like how a few studies have shown that boys are just as emotional as girls, except almost everyone sees boys, particularly teenage boys, as sex-driven cavemen. It's an unwritten rule of the society, like making eye contact. Most of the West views eye contact as a sign of respect(meaning you actually give a damn about what the person is telling you). In other places, it's seen as rude, sometimes even hostile.

It's societies rules.

PS: I don't drill holes. Don't have a drill. :(

No it's not. You're so repressed... it's just a dick, it's not like you're doing something gay/sexual with it, and it's not like you're looking at his or vice-versa.

very true, and i don't feel i'm doing anything sexual with it. its just weird. its a private thing, and a bodily function.
i wouldn't talk to someone while i was taking a shit for the same reason


please don't judge me, as you don't truly know anything about me at all

In the guys toilets, talking is almost forbidden and you must never use the middle urinal. Whats with that?

Take the test and you will learn a lot:

http://gamescene.com/The_Urinal_Game_game.html

its weird talking to someone else with your dick in your hand. simple as that...
In a public bathroom when you're there to take a piss. There are other instances when that doesn't strike me as weird :D (which do not take place in public bathrooms I should add!)

Take the test and you will learn a lot:

http://gamescene.com/The_Urinal_Game_game.html



*lol Cool game. And people still think women ar ethe onse behaving weird... :D

That's stupid and I've never found that. The middle urinal is there for a reason. I live in Ireland, though there are plenty of morons who won't respond to you when you're both pissing at urinals. And I say morons because you're probably a retard if pissing requires your full, undivided attention.

so given the option, you would choose to go to the urinal right next to another person? No one is saying you can never use the middle urinal. What we ARE saying is that given an option, give each other space. Sorry, but if there are 10 urinals, and I'm at the one on the farthest left, there is no reason you need to take the one right next to me.

and I don't exactly feel like discussing live, love, and all that whilst urinating. Give me my minutes peace, and then you can talk. Not to mention the fact that there are generally several other people in the bathroom who really don't need to or want to hear your conversation. There is no reason why you can't pause a conversation at the very least to be polite to others.

I am 24 and I still do it.

It is usually to debrief about what is going on in that specific social situation. For example, if my sister and I are out with family, we'll go to the bathroom together to get a break from the rest of the people and to say things like, "God, is mom picking on me again?! And did you get a load of Aunt Amy's pupil's? She is obviously high as a kite."

The other reason to do it is to get to know girls you are just meeting or aren't close with yet. For example, about a month ago I went out with my boyfriend, my close guy friend, and his new girlfriend for dinner. When I went to the bathroom, she went too. I told her how happy I was that my friend finally had a girlfriend and that he is obviously so happy now, and she told me how much he'd talked about me. We also discussed his sloppy dressing habits, his sloppy housekeeping habits, and what he is like in bed (she was enlightening me on that last point, cause I'd never tried).

In conclusion, you are right to be paranoid, because when girls go to the bathroom together they are indeed talking about you.

Hey Ilie ;)

Your aunt sounds like a lot of fun to be around :D

Hey Ilie ;)

Your aunt sounds like a lot of fun to be around :D

I'm just glad she's not my sister. My mom gets a headache from jaw-clenching when we hang out with my aunts.

I spent a number of years as a teenage female, and I never behaved as you described. None of my female friends did so. Some girls do the bathroom-herd thing, but most that I know of don't.

That's your experience. Doesn't invalidate the OP's experience which demonstrates the exact oposite.

(Incidentally, I've never witnessed this herding behavior either, but I believe people when they say they've seen it.)

When I got older and started going to pubs, it became more common for me to go to the bathroom with a companion, but this was mostly for safety reasons (as we would usually be pretty well loaded as the night went on and it was nice to have somebody to keep you from drowning yourself in the sink or something).

As much as I know it's going to annoy you, if you're blitzed enough to drown yourself in a sink without precautions, you've probably taken the social drug use a bit too far. Still, far be it for me to come between you and your darwin award.

If you find yourself hanging out with people, male or female, who do crazy or annoying things, perhaps you should ask yourself why you are so interested in hanging out with crazy/annoying people.

It was this sentence that made me realise it was you, Bottle. (I hardly ever read the names.) Is this a canned response whenever someone suggests female behavior differs from male behavior?

If you find yourself dating girls who do things that you simply cannot understand, perhaps you should consider speaking to those girls and asking them to explain themselves.

Didn't you get the part where he tried to get them to explain themselves, but came away with half answers that didn't significantly improve his understanding of the behavior?

Most female teenagers are quite able and willing to speak for themselves, and you shouldn't be dating any girls who aren't.

So, you don't think girls who don't express themselves well should date? You feel every girl should behave in a certain way because you say so, lest their personal relationships meet with your disaprooval?

As to the original question, I don't know why they do it. I've honestly never seen that behavior in the first place.

That's your experience. Doesn't invalidate the OP's experience which demonstrates the exact oposite.

(Incidentally, I've never witnessed this herding behavior either, but I believe people when they say they've seen it.)
I've said (largely in response to Bottle) that I know not everybody, by a long shot, does this. As such, I was stereotyping, because that makes a thread more fun ;)

Didn't you get the part where he tried to get them to explain themselves, but came away with half answers that didn't significantly improve his understanding of the behavior?
And they did their best to explain it. But I honestly think that many of the girls I talked to just hadn't thought about it very much. It seems that the social aspect of it is almost on a subliminal level (the instinctive need to continuously be a part of the social going-on), so it is rarely consciously noticed. Going to the bathroom with somebody is so routine that it ceases to be something that is reasoned through and justified each time it is done. You just do it.

I am 24 and I still do it.

It is usually to debrief about what is going on in that specific social situation. For example, if my sister and I are out with family, we'll go to the bathroom together to get a break from the rest of the people and to say things like, "God, is mom picking on me again?! And did you get a load of Aunt Amy's pupil's? She is obviously high as a kite."

The other reason to do it is to get to know girls you are just meeting or aren't close with yet. For example, about a month ago I went out with my boyfriend, my close guy friend, and his new girlfriend for dinner. When I went to the bathroom, she went too. I told her how happy I was that my friend finally had a girlfriend and that he is obviously so happy now, and she told me how much he'd talked about me. We also discussed his sloppy dressing habits, his sloppy housekeeping habits, and what he is like in bed (she was enlightening me on that last point, cause I'd never tried).

In conclusion, you are right to be paranoid, because when girls go to the bathroom together they are indeed talking about you.
I knew it! :D

On the other hand, many of them talk quite directly to me (saying things like how stupid they thought I was for ever going out with my ex, and so on). I know there's worse they could say, and probably do, but it leads me to believe that I might not be as much a victim of bathroom-gossip as other guys. Maybe.

Of course, I'm just being naive. It's all a giant female conspiracy.

It's mostly to have a private chat about the guys they're with or who are trying to get with them.

That and for a bit of girley talk.

so given the option, you would choose to go to the urinal right next to another person? No one is saying you can never use the middle urinal. What we ARE saying is that given an option, give each other space. Sorry, but if there are 10 urinals, and I'm at the one on the farthest left, there is no reason you need to take the one right next to me.

and I don't exactly feel like discussing live, love, and all that whilst urinating. Give me my minutes peace, and then you can talk. Not to mention the fact that there are generally several other people in the bathroom who really don't need to or want to hear your conversation. There is no reason why you can't pause a conversation at the very least to be polite to others.

There is also the stage fright / performance anxiety aspect of it for a significant percentage of men, where if somebody is in their personal space or looking at them they cannot easily begin to urinate.

There is also the stage fright / performance anxiety aspect of it for a significant percentage of men, where if somebody is in their personal space or looking at them they cannot easily begin to urinate.
I've never felt that way, but I suppose it probably does play a role in the maximizing of space between urinaters.

I've never felt that way, but I suppose it probably does play a role in the maximizing of space between urinaters.

I had it in Jr High. It is mostly just anxiety Id say, but some peeps suffer it their whole lives.

I had it in Jr High. It is mostly just anxiety Id say, but some peeps suffer it their whole lives.
Hmm... come to think of it, I didn't like using the school bathrooms when I was in elementary school. Interesting. Guess I'd forgotten about that.

It was this sentence that made me realise it was you, Bottle. (I hardly ever read the names.) Is this a canned response whenever someone suggests female behavior differs from male behavior?
It's pretty sound advice really... and so few people follow it. It deserves repeating *nods*

So, you don't think girls who don't express themselves well should date? You feel every girl should behave in a certain way because you say so, lest their personal relationships meet with your disaprooval?
*tries to untwist Bottle's words*

I think she was getting more at the idea that people should be healthy on their own before getting into relationships and expecting them to be healthy, or expecting to be able to cope with relationships healthily. A view me and her probably differ a bit on, but which is pretty rational, understandable and makes a fair amount of sense.

There is also the stage fright / performance anxiety aspect of it for a significant percentage of men, where if somebody is in their personal space or looking at them they cannot easily begin to urinate.

definatly. Back when I used to have modesty, I definatly had trouble going to the bathroom with others close by.

Thank you college for killing all modesty I once had. Something about sharing a bathroom with 20 other guys, only having two urinals, two showers, and two stalls makes you alot more comfortable with yourself and others.