NationStates Jolt Archive

Something along the lines of "What's the stupidest thing you've heard this week", but now it's "What's the stupidest thing you've seen someone do". Share your tales of utter Stupidity.

My story is of a simple server, Gaming Neelix BC, in a simple game, True Combat: Elite (It's a CS clone). I was playing on there, when I noticed something pecular. One of the moderators kept TKing me. I asked him to stop, and he kept doing it. I told the other moderators what they were doing. They started TKing me. Then they started blabbing out everything the stereotypical pre-adolescent with too much time on their hands will start blabbing out. (I.E. Lolzors, uze ass just got pwn3d, lolz!!11!!!11ONE) Yep. God damned stupid pre-adolescents...

Anyways, now share yours!

Once I broke my wrist by surfing on a trombone case.

*wins thread*

Once I broke my wrist by surfing on a trombone case.

*wins thread*

You tried to surf on a trombone case? On a frickin' trombone case?

You tried to surf on a trombone case? On a frickin' trombone case?

Yes. As I said, I win the thread.

I convinced a girl at my high school that mexicans will die if exposed to mustard(the condiment not the gas) and that we could defend the border by smearing it with mustard...

I convinced a girl at my high school that mexicans will die if exposed to mustard(the condiment not the gas) and that we could defend the border by smearing it with mustard...

She really thought that? Dear god I have to try something like that. I'm sure the large majority of students at MY High-School are sufficently more stupid than yours.

My history teacher spelled Afghanistan with a ph once.
Ummm...
I once corrected a test in that same class where some idiot selected 'Ghandi' as the leader of the Persian forces at the battle of Thermopolae (mispelled, most likely). It was a multiple choice test to.

Okay back story, my dad and I built a steam table for a restruant that my family used to own, to save time and money we put the water pump and the heat lamps for the food on the same breaker, meaning if the water was pumping the heat lamps were off and if the heat lamps were on that the water wouldn't pump.

Which btw isn't a problem since you only fill it at the begining of the day and empty it at the end so you don't need the heat lamps on when you are pumping water.

Well, enter this idiot my dad hired. He does something (at the time we aren't sure what) that is making the water level go down in the steam table, now since the heating elements must be wet if they are on (otherwise they burn out) my dad installed a water level reader that if the water level dips below a certain amount the pump adds more in until it's "safe".

So, as you probably have figured out the water level during the day kept going below the point so the heat lamps would turn off and the pump would turn on, now the idiot (his name was Justin, if you wanted to know) decided that he would trouble shoot, and this part is important so I bold after I told him 3 times in detail why the heat lamps were going off anyway, long story short, I walk in from the walk-in freezer and see him with his hand in the water, holding a plug into a socket trying to get the water to pump while the heat lamps are on...........

yeah, he electrocuted himself. I had to get a broom and pull his dumbass off the steam table and perform CPR until the paramedics arrived, and then 4 days later in the hospital he says "did you put the plug back in the steam table?"

apparently the idiot unplugged it so he could figure out how it works. :headbang:

he sued us, we counter sued, he got his doctors bills paid $3000 and we won a judgement for the replacement of the steam table $6000

She really thought that? Dear god I have to try something like that. I'm sure the large majority of students at MY High-School are sufficently more stupid than yours.

I would disagree with you there, a kid at my school, while dashing to the cafeteria, tried to jump over a 6-step-stairway and smashed his head right into the ceiling, breaking his skull and knocking himself unconscious. The school was put on code red.(blood all over the stairs)

Hmmm I'd have to say the stupidest tale I've ever heard is of a guy who was cleaning a deep fryer while there was still boiling hot grease in it. Long story short while cleaning the top part of it he fell in and deep fryed his legs.

apparently the idiot unplugged it so he could figure out how it works. :headbang:

he sued us, we counter sued, he got his doctors bills paid $3000 and we won a judgement for the replacement of the steam table $6000

did justin happen to be a chimpanzee? :rolleyes:

stupidity like this makes me question darwin...

I would disagree with you there, a kid at my school, while dashing to the cafeteria, tried to jump over a 6-step-stairway and smashed his head right into the ceiling, breaking his skull and knocking himself unconscious. The school was put on code red.(blood all over the stairs)

my freshman year two girls got into a fight and one pushed the other through a pane glass window, and instead of the teacher trying to help her put pressure on her arm and calling for help on the intercom he sent her to the nurses office, there was a trail of blood down the hallway, down the stairs and through the other end of the school. We were on "lockdown" for 4 hours.........

idiots.

I would disagree with you there, a kid at my school, while dashing to the cafeteria, tried to jump over a 6-step-stairway and smashed his head right into the ceiling, breaking his skull and knocking himself unconscious. The school was put on code red.(blood all over the stairs)

Ha ha at that. Now it's my turn. This was a little after school. My parents were taking a while. I look into the parking lot. There are these guys who have set up a ramp. They are planning to skateboard-jump over ten cars. I think that's all that needs to be said. And they didn't try it just once.

this thread is making me wonder if humans aren't just apes with pants...

did justin happen to be a chimpanzee? :rolleyes:

stupidity like this makes me question darwin...

he smoked a lot of pot.......and was probably stupid on top of that.

He missed 3 weeks of work once because he had 3rd degree burns on his face and chest because his car had overheated and the idiot got out and opened the radiator to see if it had any fluid.

:rolleyes: Like the little lid on it says "don't open if hot" and he just ignored that, I bet he couldn't read.

We fired him, twice, my dad just felt bad for him. I can't say I was ever very patient with him, he annoyed me so much.

Ever wonder why some blenders have the "do not stick hand in to touch blades while this blender is on" label on them that seem to insult your intelligence? Even though there were almost always handy bandaids nearby, some people can't resist a good lawsuit. Catch my drift?

Hmm, stupidest thing I've ever seen. Well I don't know if this would count, but here goes. I used to be in the Boy Scout, and as a BS you went on alot of camping trips. Well one Summer we were on a week long trip. Now this guy is usually a smart guy. Well he decides to put up a green clothes line. Now we were in real woods, so there's alot of green around. Later that day, another guy was chasing him, and apparently his green clothes line blended very well into nature, and well BAM!

I dunno if you just call that stupid or what. He lived he just had a shock.

[snip]
So, as you probably have figured out the water level during the day kept going below the point so the heat lamps would turn off and the pump would turn on, now the idiot (his name was Justin, if you wanted to know) decided that he would trouble shoot, and this part is important so I bold after I told him 3 times in detail why the heat lamps were going off anyway, long story short, I walk in from the walk-in freezer and see him with his hand in the water, holding a plug into a socket trying to get the water to pump while the heat lamps are on........... I had a classmate in the 8th grade named Justin...

Every day after science class he'd leave his books, notes and other stuff on the set of lockers as he left... when he came into class, he'd pull the books down from the same lockers. meaning he never took his books, homework nor notes home (our science class was at the end of the day.)

one day, after getting his Mid-term report card, (failing by the way... Go figure :rolleyes: ) he complains in a loud voice that he really doesn't belong in the class with all the Brains.

The Teacher (a very funny man who made science fun!) heard this and commented, "Why? Don't you have a Brain?"

Clueless Justin replied, (seriously and straight faced): No.
The Teacher just paused... stared at him and said. "You sure you don't have a brain?"
Justin: no, I don't.
Teach: I'm sure everyone has a brain... (turns to the other students and randomly selects people.) Don't you have a brain? (to which the reply was yes... everyone was trying not to laugh btw) see... so I'm sure you have a brain too.
Justin: (finally understanding the joke.) well, yes, I have a brain but I'm not smart like these people.
Teach: really... Do you own a spare set of text books?
Justin: No
Teach: I see... so you say you're not smart... you don't own a set of books at home, and everyday you place your books over there (points to the set of lockers) and leave... here I thought you knew all this stuff... so why arn't you taking your books home?
Justin: because it doesn't look cool for me to take books home.
Teach: (stunned, one of the few times I've seen that expression on his face.) doesn't look... I'll tell you what, I'll wrap a second text book in a plain bookcover and let you sneak it home. then you can study and still look "cool" and you won't fail.

after practically being scolded for his lack of trying... the bell rang and guess what... he still left with his books on the lockers...


and don't get me started on his lighting of the Bunsen burner... :rolleyes:

1) Open vent on bunsen burner
2) Light match.
3) While holding match over burner, slowly open gas valve untill burner is lit.
4) Adjust Valve on Burner to alter flame.

and our teacher did demonstrate the dangers of letting the gass build up then lighting it. (My first memory of watching a controlled fireball.)

Guess what order of steps he took....

If you guessed,
1 Open vent on bunsen burner
2 open gas valve all the way...
3 Light match... actually, look for match box, get match... attempt to light match.... break match... get next match... attempt to light that match... (remember, the gas is traveling throught the tube, and out of the burner all the time he's doing this...)

Fortunatly, the teacher noticed what he was doing and shut the valve at his table before anything major happened...

I had a classmate in the 8th grade named Justin...

Every day after science class he'd leave his books, notes and other stuff on the set of lockers as he left... when he came into class, he'd pull the books down from the same lockers. meaning he never took his books, homework nor notes home (our science class was at the end of the day.)

one day, after getting his Mid-term report card, (failing by the way... Go figure :rolleyes: ) he complains in a loud voice that he really doesn't belong in the class with all the Brains.

The Teacher (a very funny man who made science fun!) heard this and commented, "Why? Don't you have a Brain?"

Clueless Justin replied, (seriously and straight faced): No.
The Teacher just paused... stared at him and said. "You sure you don't have a brain?"
Justin: no, I don't.
Teach: I'm sure everyone has a brain... (turns to the other students and randomly selects people.) Don't you have a brain? (to which the reply was yes... everyone was trying not to laugh btw) see... so I'm sure you have a brain too.
Justin: (finally understanding the joke.) well, yes, I have a brain but I'm not smart like these people.
Teach: really... Do you own a spare set of text books?
Justin: No
Teach: I see... so you say you're not smart... you don't own a set of books at home, and everyday you place your books over there (points to the set of lockers) and leave... here I thought you knew all this stuff... so why arn't you taking your books home?
Justin: because it doesn't look cool for me to take books home.
Teach: (stunned, one of the few times I've seen that expression on his face.) doesn't look... I'll tell you what, I'll wrap a second text book in a plain bookcover and let you sneak it home. then you can study and still look "cool" and you won't fail.

after practically being scolded for his lack of trying... the bell rang and guess what... he still left with his books on the lockers...


and don't get me started on his lighting of the Bunsen burner... :rolleyes:

1) Open vent on bunsen burner
2) Light match.
3) While holding match over burner, slowly open gas valve untill burner is lit.
4) Adjust Valve on Burner to alter flame.

and our teacher did demonstrate the dangers of letting the gass build up then lighting it. (My first memory of watching a controlled fireball.)

Guess what order of steps he took....

If you guessed,
1 Open vent on bunsen burner
2 open gas valve all the way...
3 Light match... actually, look for match box, get match... attempt to light match.... break match... get next match... attempt to light that match... (remember, the gas is traveling throught the tube, and out of the burner all the time he's doing this...)

Fortunatly, the teacher noticed what he was doing and shut the valve at his table before anything major happened...

He sounds like a Darwins Award waiting to happen.

LOL... I dug into the dregs of my memory and found this gem...


One of my former co-workers boasted loud and long, when she was first hired, about her certifications... her awards and honors in the field of Computer Science... (why she was working tech support is beyond me. :rolleyes: ;) ) while most of us didn't... she seemed to like to lord it over me...

one day, we get a new computer, complete with a CD drive (the old ones where the cd needs to be put in a cassette and the whole thing inserted into the drive... yes it was THAT long ago.

I was helping a user while she was setting this pc that would be used as a server. so, when she was ready to install the server programs, she asked for the CD.

I grabbed the only copy of the cd (already inside the cd cassette) and handed the whole thing to her and she proceeded to take the CD out and try to insert it into the drive sans cassette...

I yelled at her (knowing that it was the only copy we had) and showed her how the cd drive worked.

Later, one of our other co-workers... one who isn't as tactful as I am... asked her out loud "So, you still keeping all your certifications up to date?"


The silence was deafening... :D

LOL... I dug into the dregs of my memory and found this gem...


One of my former co-workers boasted loud and long, when she was first hired, about her certifications... her awards and honors in the field of Computer Science... (why she was working tech support is beyond me. :rolleyes: ;) ) while most of us didn't... she seemed to like to lord it over me...

one day, we get a new computer, complete with a CD drive (the old ones where the cd needs to be put in a cassette and the whole thing inserted into the drive... yes it was THAT long ago.

I was helping a user while she was setting this pc that would be used as a server. so, when she was ready to install the server programs, she asked for the CD.

I grabbed the only copy of the cd (already inside the cd cassette) and handed the whole thing to her and she proceeded to take the CD out and try to insert it into the drive sans cassette...

I yelled at her (knowing that it was the only copy we had) and showed her how the cd drive worked.

Later, one of our other co-workers... one who isn't as tactful as I am... asked her out loud "So, you still keeping all your certifications up to date?"


The silence was deafening... :D

lol! ouch!

Dumbest thing I've seen recently:

I went to the local Wal-mart, and this woman is creaming about kleenex, of course, i couldn't resist getting right up close... turns out Kleenex had stopped making a certain box design, and she had decorated her bathroom, bedroom and kitchen to match the tissue boxes...

Does that count for stupidity?

I had a classmate 2 years ago (7th grade) who wanted to take over the world. Not as a joke. He was completely serious. He became convinced I was the smartest person in the grade, and was constantly badgering me about theoretical weapons. He also liked this girl in our class, and told her when he ruled the world he'd give her Hawaii. As if he wasn't insane enough, he also wrote down a rambling theory that, although I don't remember the exact point, boiled down to the idea that he had very simply proved the all geometry up until him was, in fact, incorrect.