NationStates Jolt Archive


Just When I Thought Boy Band Members Couldn't Get Any Gayer

New Domici
07-09-2006, 19:09
It had to happen sooner or later. I finally have an opinion that has nothing to do with politics.

Ok, so since Air America (http://www.airamericaradio.com) moved from 1190AM to 1600AM here in NYC I've been listening to a lot more music radio, because my car radio doesn't pick up 1600 very well for some reason.

The other day I started to hear this song in which, as far as I could tell, some aggresivly sexual pop-tart was singing about how sexy she is to the accompaniment of a rapper who was rapping his agreement with her sexy thesis and the urges to which it motivates him.

Just from listening to the song it seemed to be something along the lines of "the Ill Nana" or that "Milkshake" that "brings all the boys to the yard." But this morning I was flipping through channels and was shocked to discover that MTV was playing music. After that shock I was only mildly perplexed at what this musical interstitial had in store for me. The song I described above was playing. The "aggresivly sexual pop-tart" was none other than Justin Timberlake. He was singing this sexy duet with the rapper Timbaland.

It seems that his post boy-band metrosexual makeover has not rendered him the macho-man that his publicists intended. More, the other kind (http://www.rotten.com/library/culture/village-people/).

Perhaps this board has a member or two who would like to defend Justin? "But Domici, there was a sexy woman in her underwear in the video, doesn't that mean you probably misunderstood the intention of the lyrics?"

No it doesn't. Pay attention. He's terrified of this woman and her sexy, demi-cupped boobies. He spends the whole video cowering in his room. To showcase the threat that sexy women pose to Timberlake the video concludes with her trying to kill him.

Even the title of the song is a double entendre of homosexuality.

The line "I'm bringing sexy back," might strike the listener as meaning "I'm going to bring back sexy the way Quentin Tarrentino brought back John Travolta and the way that Billy Ray Cyrus did not bring back the mullet." But to the viewer it becomes apparent that he plans to bring "sexy back" the way one brings back a set of designer chardonnay glasses to Pier 1 because one of them had a chip on the rim.

The way those words are parsed for the title are also telling. Most would have constructed a title from these lyrics as "Bringing Sexy Back." It makes for a much less ambiguous meaning. "Sexy Back" sung as a duet with another guy makes it clear that "sexy back" is not an incomplete verb, but rather a description of his own back, which he is presenting to Timbaland.

I suppose I should have some sort of conclusion other than to simply end with Justin Timberlake is gay. I could just as well end with "the sky is blue," though I will dispense with a criticism of conservative politics that I would find equally obvious which is more my hallmark.

I guess I'll ask "Why does Justin Timberlake still pretend he's straight?"
Deep Kimchi
07-09-2006, 19:17
I guess I'll ask "Why does Justin Timberlake still pretend he's straight?"

Because being gay is bad for his target market, young girls who fantasize about him while reading Tiger Beat.
Andaluciae
07-09-2006, 19:18
Once again my juvenile claims that "boy bands are gay" to my little sister, regarding her music listening habits 7 years ago, hold true.



"I have been to the top of the mountain, and you shall worship me as a God"

*gets shot in face*
Edwardis
07-09-2006, 19:19
I thought this was going to be a very late thread about Lance Bass or whatever his name is.
Deep Kimchi
07-09-2006, 19:21
I thought this was going to be a very late thread about Lance Bass or whatever his name is.

Also gay. Ever notice a trend in young male stars who are marketed to young girls?

I could go back to George Michael and Wham!
Edwardis
07-09-2006, 19:23
Also gay. Ever notice a trend in young male stars who are marketed to young girls?

I could go back to George Michael and Wham!

All the attention from girls drive them the other way.
Isidoor
07-09-2006, 19:25
couldn't they just market him to gay men?
Deep Kimchi
07-09-2006, 19:25
All the attention from girls drive them the other way.

No, I think their masculinity is somehow tempered in a way that is non-threatening (or appears so) to young girls.
Farnhamia
07-09-2006, 19:28
Step carefully away from the AM radio ... :p
Andaluciae
07-09-2006, 19:29
couldn't they just market him to gay men?

There's a lot fewer gay men than there are pre-pubescent girls.
Edwardis
07-09-2006, 19:29
No, I think their masculinity is somehow tempered in a way that is non-threatening (or appears so) to young girls.

Well, if you think homo/bisexuality is natural (in the sense that one is born so), then yes, of course so.
Isidoor
07-09-2006, 19:32
There's a lot fewer gay men than there are pre-pubescent girls.

wouldn't they have more money since they are probably older?
Deep Kimchi
07-09-2006, 19:32
Well, if you think homo/bisexuality is natural (in the sense that one is born so), then yes, of course so.

I do think that it's natural.
Edwardis
07-09-2006, 19:33
I do think that it's natural.

That's okay. You're allowed to be wrong. :p

Anyway, I think this is a discussion for another thread.
Andaluciae
07-09-2006, 19:38
wouldn't they have more money since they are probably older?

Not necessarily, espescially when compared to the consumption habits of pre-pubescent girls, and their sources of money: Mommy and daddy.
Isidoor
07-09-2006, 19:41
Not necessarily, espescially when compared to the consumption habits of pre-pubescent girls, and their sources of money: Mommy and daddy.

there goes my "get rich fast by becoming a boy band member mainly marketed to gay men"-plan :(
The Mindset
07-09-2006, 19:59
There's a lot fewer gay men than there are pre-pubescent girls.

Madonna seems to do okay.
Deep Kimchi
07-09-2006, 20:03
Well, if you think homo/bisexuality is natural (in the sense that one is born so), then yes, of course so.

Tell me, what springs into your mind when you see this picture:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/derek45/funny/114.jpg

Tell me the first thing that came into your mind.

If it had anything to do with the possibility that something large and cylindrical was being used for sexual penetration of someone who is bent over, you realize how natural the tendency can be. Even if you're a heterosexual.
Sonaj
07-09-2006, 20:04
Just When I Thought Boy Band Members Couldn't Get Any Gayer
They'll always find ways.
Wilgrove
07-09-2006, 20:33
Tell me, what springs into your mind when you see this picture:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/derek45/funny/114.jpg

Tell me the first thing that came into your mind.

If it had anything to do with the possibility that something large and cylindrical was being used for sexual penetration of someone who is bent over, you realize how natural the tendency can be. Even if you're a heterosexual.

Yea, but that sexual penetration is not going into the anus, but the vagina.

As for Boy Bands being Gay. I would like to quote Lewis Black

N*Sync, is gay! That's right Atlanta, you're alittle shock aren't you? Well they're gay; Gay, gay, gay, gay, fresh and fruity. I don't know who their manager is, but he's gay too.

Not an exact quote, but close enough.
Kraggistan
07-09-2006, 20:37
You know what is ironic?

WHen I oppened this thread the mp3 song that was playing was "Which backstreet boy is gay?" :)
Deep Kimchi
07-09-2006, 20:38
Yea, but that sexual penetration is not going into the anus, but the vagina.

Only an inch apart in the dark...
Wilgrove
07-09-2006, 20:44
Only an inch apart in the dark...

Yea, but usually you can tell, the anus would be tighter, and yea.
Deep Kimchi
07-09-2006, 20:45
Yea, but usually you can tell, the anus would be tighter, and yea.

Oh, like you would say no if she let you...
Wilgrove
07-09-2006, 20:46
Oh, like you would say no if she let you...

Actually I would, 1. To me personally, Anus is out traffic only. 2. Don't need a poo covered penis.
Deep Kimchi
07-09-2006, 20:47
Actually I would, 1. To me personally, Anus is out traffic only. 2. Don't need a poo covered penis.

She can have her ass cleaned up before you show up for service.
Khadgar
07-09-2006, 20:50
couldn't they just market him to gay men?

Justin Timberlake? No gay man with self esteem would nail that prissy bitch.
Glitziness
07-09-2006, 20:53
Why does anyone care? Seriously, how/why is it of any interest or significance or relevance to anything?

I just don't understand why celebrities or people's sexuality are so interesting...
Farnhamia
07-09-2006, 21:00
Why does anyone care? Seriously, how/why is it of any interest or significance or relevance to anything?

I just don't understand why celebrities or people's sexuality are so interesting...

It's a distraction from our own miserable, worthless lives ... *slumps down in a corner* :p
Sonaj
07-09-2006, 21:02
*Hands farnhamia a cookie* There there, cheer up :)
New Domici
07-09-2006, 21:08
Why does anyone care? Seriously, how/why is it of any interest or significance or relevance to anything?

I just don't understand why celebrities or people's sexuality are so interesting...

1. Hypocrisy. I don't care if you're gay. I care if you're gay and deny it, or deny it and chastize real gays for being gay (not really relavent here).

2. I wouldn't have given it another thought if not for the fact that I thought it was a duet between a man and a woman and was surprised to discover it was a Justin Timberlake song.
Farnhamia
07-09-2006, 21:09
*Hands farnhamia a cookie* There there, cheer up :)

Cookie! :D Much better now, thank you!

And come on, let's all admit we love hearing a little gossip about famous people now and then, shall we? What's the line from the movie of Amadeus, where Mozart is trying to convince the Court to let him put on The Marriage of Figaro? "Which of you wouldn't rather listen to your hairdresser than to Hercules?" We can't be serious all the time, and goodness, celebrities do seem intent on providing entertainment with their private lives (or just their privates), so what the heck?
New Domici
07-09-2006, 21:09
She can have her ass cleaned up before you show up for service.

Or a couple of your soapy fingers for her in the shower can make for a nice prelude.
New Domici
07-09-2006, 21:12
No, I think their masculinity is somehow tempered in a way that is non-threatening (or appears so) to young girls.

That's exactly it. It's also why anthropologists say that Mister Clean is bald and that "the Brawny Man" recently got replaced by an unmustachioed successor (who was introduced as "the softer side of Brawny" during the interlude).
Glitziness
07-09-2006, 21:47
It's a distraction from our own miserable, worthless lives ... *slumps down in a corner* :p
Because their life is worth so much more than other peoples? Yeah...

1. Hypocrisy. I don't care if you're gay. I care if you're gay and deny it, or deny it and chastize real gays for being gay (not really relavent here).
Why do you care if someone denies it? Denying it and chastizing, yes, but simply denying it? Taking into account so many peoples' attitudes, I'd find it understandable. Either way, I still don't see why it's an issue.

2. I wouldn't have given it another thought if not for the fact that I thought it was a duet between a man and a woman and was surprised to discover it was a Justin Timberlake song.
Yeah, sure. I just don't see understand it would be interesting enough, and be on your mind enough, to go to the effort of writing a long thread about it. I'd just think "huh - he has a more feminine voice than I remember" and the possibility of him being gay cross my mind. I wouldn't start gathering evidence from his song and lyrics to prove this point on a forum...

Then again, I do understand the powers of boredom, randomness and procrastination... all acceptable reasons :p
Deep Kimchi
07-09-2006, 21:51
Then again, I do understand the powers of boredom, randomness and procrastination... all acceptable reasons :p

The boy bands are marketed primarily to young girls. Young heterosexual girls, who fantasize about the boys in the band.

Kinda hard to fantasize, when you know for a fact the guy is gay.

It's rather like the guy is pretending to be someone he is not. Just to sell records.
Greyenivol Colony
07-09-2006, 21:52
Meh, its not necessarily gay - its just "bi chic", like when Madonna snogged Britney Spears.
Khadgar
07-09-2006, 21:53
Meh, its not necessarily gay - its just "bi chic", like when Madonna snogged Britney Spears.

Doesn't work for guys.
Glitziness
07-09-2006, 21:56
The boy bands are marketed primarily to young girls. Young heterosexual girls, who fantasize about the boys in the band.

Kinda hard to fantasize, when you know for a fact the guy is gay.

It's rather like the guy is pretending to be someone he is not. Just to sell records.
And? That's hardly unusual in any kind of media, business, marketing of any kind... People who are truly themselves in the public eye.... that's damn rare, I'm sure.

I don't support it, and don't like it - one of the reasons I have no interest in celebrities is because it's all fake - but it's hardly news to anyone that people in the music industry will create images and manipulate to sell records...
IL Ruffino
07-09-2006, 21:59
I guess I'll ask "Why does Justin Timberlake still pretend he's straight?"
:rolleyes:
Greyenivol Colony
07-09-2006, 22:01
Doesn't work for guys.

Sure it does. I know loads of girls who find the image of two guys kissing sexy, granted a lot of them think that bumsecks is gross - the fact is that bi chic is increasingly becoming an effective way to garner public support, especially amongst the target audience.
Not bad
07-09-2006, 23:29
It's a distraction from our own miserable, worthless lives ... *slumps down in a corner* :p

*ateempts a feverishly difficult slapstick pratfall with banana peel to cheer Farny up*

* fails to execute pratfall properly but still lands on his butt on the floor*

*Gets up grinning and bowing to Farny pretending it's what I meant to do*
Irate Moas
07-09-2006, 23:31
Meh. Not that I like Justin Timberlake enough to care about the OP, but why is being gay a negative?
Deep Kimchi
07-09-2006, 23:37
Meh. Not that I like Justin Timberlake enough to care about the OP, but why is being gay a negative?

The boy bands are marketed primarily to young girls. Young heterosexual girls, who fantasize about the boys in the band.

Kinda hard to fantasize, when you know for a fact the guy is gay.

It's rather like the guy is pretending to be someone he is not. Just to sell records.

Sheesh. That's the third time I've said it in this thread.
Liberated New Ireland
07-09-2006, 23:41
The boy bands are marketed primarily to young girls. Young heterosexual girls, who fantasize about the boys in the band.

Kinda hard to fantasize, when you know for a fact the guy is gay.

It's rather like the guy is pretending to be someone he is not. Just to sell records.

Sheesh. That's the third time I've said it in this thread.

*Gives DK a big ol' hug* I hope the fact that I'm bi makes you really uncomfortable. If not, meh.

And, once again, a surprising number of lil' girls find boys kissin' on each other to be "hawt".

Which is probably the main reason bands like My Chemical Romance got super-popular... and turned their backs on their actual fans in the process... (I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU, MR. WAY!!!)
United Chicken Kleptos
07-09-2006, 23:42
"I have been to the top of the mountain, and you shall worship me as a God"

*gets shot in face*

*throws sniper rifle away*

....

What? I didn't do it.
Intestinal fluids
07-09-2006, 23:44
Its time to buy Sirius Satellite Radio. It really cuts down dramatically on the crap content.
Deep Kimchi
07-09-2006, 23:46
*Gives DK a big ol' hug* I hope the fact that I'm bi makes you really uncomfortable. If not, meh.

I hope the fact that I'm a bisexual Republican Pentacostal Christian who is married and still plays with men (my wife and I both swing) really makes you uncomfortable.
Drunk commies deleted
07-09-2006, 23:49
Its time to buy Sirius Satellite Radio. It really cuts down dramatically on the crap content.

Go for XM and you get access to Opie and Anthony as well as the Ron and Fez show. Or maybe not. If you can't stand effeminate men Fez "Marie" Watley would probably make you shoot your radio.
Liberated New Ireland
07-09-2006, 23:50
I hope the fact that I'm a bisexual Republican Pentacostal Christian who is married and still plays with men (my wife and I both swing) really makes you uncomfortable.

*shrug* Why would it?
Deep Kimchi
07-09-2006, 23:50
*shrug* Why would it?

For some strange reason, you thought it would bother me.

Obviously, you haven't been on this forum very long.
Liberated New Ireland
07-09-2006, 23:53
For some strange reason, you thought it would bother me.

Obviously, you haven't been on this forum very long.

*snort*

I was kidding, retread.
Intestinal fluids
07-09-2006, 23:57
Go for XM and you get access to Opie and Anthony as well as the Ron and Fez show. Or maybe not. If you can't stand effeminate men Fez "Marie" Watley would probably make you shoot your radio.


Howard Stern > O&A= Easy choice
Drunk commies deleted
07-09-2006, 23:58
Howard Stern > O&A= Easy choice

HOO HOO, Robin, I invented everything.

Howard was funny into the early nineties, but he's lost his edge.

Hoo Hoo's Myspace http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=39634535
Intestinal fluids
08-09-2006, 00:08
HOO HOO, Robin, I invented everything.

Howard was funny into the early nineties, but he's lost his edge.



Have you heard anything he has done since being unhindered by the FCC? His show is hysterical.
Wilgrove
08-09-2006, 00:10
HOO HOO, Robin, I invented everything.

Howard was funny into the early nineties, but he's lost his edge.

Hoo Hoo's Myspace http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=39634535

Even the sharpest edge must get dull sometimes.